Coming Clean


Renee was in the middle of cooking dinner for herself in her apartment when she heard a knock at her door. She turned down the pots, wiping her hands on a kitchen towel and making her way to answer the door.

When she opened it up she saw AJ standing with a bag and a puffy face from all her tears, which were still pouring.

"Hey." AJ said with a lump in her throat.

"Hey." Renee shook her head with confusion, "What's wrong? Are you ok?" She guided AJ into her apartment, closing the door over.

"Would it be ok if I stayed here for… a little while?" AJ asked, drying her tears.

"Of course." Renee said, "But what's going on? Did you and Jason have a bad fight?" She figured.

"I slept with Phil." AJ's lip quivered as Renee raised her eyebrows, "And I had to tell him. I couldn't… I couldn't lie like that to him." She shook her head.

"You… You slept with Phil?" Renee asked, "When?"

"Last night." AJ said as Renee looked at her, trying to find the words but not being able to. She was shocked just because it didn't seem like something her friend was capable of doing, not because she wasn't attracted to Punk.

"Ok… ok, you sit your bag down and come through to the kitchen." Renee nodded, taking the bag from AJ and sitting in the hallway, walking through to the kitchen as AJ followed.

She kept drying her tears but more kept coming out.

"Smells nice in here." AJ mumbled, taking a seat at the table as Renee looked at her with confusion, "What?" AJ shook her head.

"You slept with him?" Renee whispered, "I mean… full blown sex? Not just another kiss or anything?"

"Slept with him means I slept with him." AJ said, "And you can judge me all you want, I judge me." She assured her.

"I just… I thought you would end things with Jason first." Renee said, "Cause I know you like Phil. Well… you like him a lot-"

"Don't." AJ closed her eyes.

"How did you both… how did you end up sleeping with him?" Renee wondered.

"Do you want the truth?" AJ asked.

"Yeah." Renee nodded.

"Cause I wanted to sleep with him." AJ nodded, tears in her eyes, "And I know that makes me a terrible, terrible person. But I went to his apartment, told myself I was just checking up on him, because of what happened with his mom's house… but I knew why I was going there." She shook her head.

"Was it awkward?" Renee wondered. Asking the important questions, of course.

"No." AJ shook her head, "No, it was amazing." She nodded, "And I didn't want it to end. But then it did and I realised just what an awful thing it was to do to someone I love. Someone I want to marry." She sighed, "And now it's all ruined."

"What did Jason say?" Renee cringed.

"At first he said nothing. I don't think he actually believed me. I didn't tell him it was Phil. I just said he didn't know the guy." AJ nodded, "But then he got mad and started yelling." She said, "Said he wanted me out of the house and that I should probably take off my engagement ring because there's not gonna be a wedding anymore." AJ shrugged, "Pretty much what I deserve and what I expected."

"Did you tell him that you had feelings for Phil?" Renee asked.

"No." AJ shook her head, "No, I just… I made it out like it was a cheap mistake. I don't know what I was expecting. It would be insane if he forgave me. I wouldn't forgive him if he did this to me." AJ shrugged.

"So… you guys are broken up?" Renee asked as AJ nodded.

"Well yeah, I mean… no one wants to stay with a cheater." AJ shook her head, "I wouldn't."

"You shouldn't be so hard on yourself." Renee sighed.

"Why shouldn't I?" AJ questioned, "I love Jason. Things have been hard these past few weeks but that's no excuse. He deserves better than me and I… I just can't believe I did this to him." She shook her head.

"April, do you not realise why you did it?" Renee asked, "It seems like everyone else around you does."

"What?" AJ shook her head.

"You're falling for Phil." Renee nodded, "You have been all this time. Did that make it ok for you to sleep with him? Hell no. But you did and now you have decisions to make." She said, "I see it. When you're around him. You're like a… teenager with a crush. You're happy." She nodded.

"It's just different." AJ sighed, "He makes me feel things I've never felt before. Like when he looks at me… makes me feel like I'm the only one in the room." She nodded, "And last night…"

"Was it good?" Renee nodded as AJ sighed to herself.

"It was more than good." AJ shook her head, "But then that made me feel worse after because I should have felt like it was wrong. Being with another man like that… it should have felt weird and odd but it didn't. I didn't even wanna leave him." She admitted.

"Can I ask you something?" Renee asked as AJ nodded, "Do you see yourself marrying Jason?" She asked.

"He's not gonna marry me now. He was so upset… so angry." AJ shook her head.

"But if he… if he forgave you and he wanted to work it out… would you still marry him?" Renee asked as AJ looked across at her, "Even though you feel how you feel about Phil?"

AJ didn't get to answer as there was another knock on the door, which she knew would be Dean as they'd set up a date night at her place after he got off work.

She left the kitchen, opening up the door to him as he walked straight in.

"You have to leave." Renee told him.

"I just got here." Dean frowned sadly.

"April is here. She's probably gonna be staying with me for a while." Renee told him.

"So she told him?" Dean figured.

"You knew?" Renee gasped.

"I saw her literally leaving Phil's bedroom." Dean scoffed.

"And you never told me?" Renee questioned.

"I'm no gossip. I knew you'd find out eventually." Dean shrugged, "So he kicked her out?" He asked as Renee nodded.

"Yeah." Renee nodded, "She didn't tell him it was Phil specifically, though. Which I think is a good thing."

"Do I really have to leave?" Dean huffed.

"I need to be there for her tonight." Renee nodded, "I'll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise." She smiled.

"Yeah you will." Dean scoffed as she smiled.

"Go on, get out of here." Renee shoved him out the door as he left respectfully to let her be there for her friend.

Renee wandered back into the kitchen where AJ was still sitting, almost in a daze of shock.

"You didn't have to make him leave." AJ said, feeling bad.

"I can see him tomorrow." Renee shook her head, "You need me more tonight."

"I just can't believe I screwed this up so bad. I was… so happy with Jason. You know I was." AJ said.

"You were… but maybe somehow you know you can be happier." Renee said, "That doesn't make you a bad person."

"No but cheating does." AJ shook her head bluntly.

"What have you said to Phil?" Renee asked curiously.

"Not much." AJ said, "He probably just thinks I'm some whore who sleeps around, cheats on her fiancé-"

"No, of course he doesn't. I think he clearly see you're not like that." Renee said, "And I also think he really likes you." She nodded as AJ looked across at her.

"What the hell am I supposed to do?" AJ shook her head as Renee looked at her.

"Ok… we're gonna get into our pj's, and we're gonna order take out and watch shitty movies on the couch." Renee nodded, "That's what we're gonna do."

The girls did exactly that. Renee abandoned the food she was cooking in the kitchen and ordered them a pizza and some ice-cream for after. She had to be there for her friend right now in any way she could, and give the most truthful advice she could give her. That was what being a friend was.


AJ spent the night crying off and on, thinking back to how angry and upset Jason was, how he said he couldn't even stand the sight of her, and that was exactly how she felt about herself too.

"Was that why you were avoiding me all day today?" Renee asked, sitting on her sofa with AJ, a blanket covering them both whilst a movie played on the TV in the corner.

"Yeah. I just wanted to tell Jason first." AJ said, "How good of me, right?"

"Hey, you told him the truth pretty much right away. Not a lot of people do that." Renee said, "You can stay with me for however long you need." She assured her.

"Thank you." AJ nodded sincerely, "You must think I'm a mess."

"I think you're just confused and there's a lot going on." Renee said, "Give me the details about last night." She nodded, not being able to help herself.

"Renee." AJ rolled her eyes.

"What?" Renee chuckled, "Not too much detail but like… did you get to… you know…" She nodded.

"Yes. A lot." AJ assured her.

"Is he a giver?" Renee smiled as AJ nodded to her.

"Yeah. He gave a lot." AJ nodded to herself again, rolling her head back on the couch and sighing to herself, "It was amazing." She shook her head, "Every single second."

"Would it be so bad if you were falling for him and it just wasn't meant to be for you and Jason?" Renee asked, "Cause that's how it seems from my point of view."

"It wouldn't be bad but it… something about it doesn't feel right. I still love Jason." AJ nodded.

"Do you? Or do you just feel safe with him and felt safe at the idea of settling with him?" Renee asked her.

"What does it even matter now? We're pretty much over." AJ shook her head, "And I just know I don't wanna go running to Phil." She said.

"Cause of the guilt and shame?" Renee asked.

"Maybe." AJ nodded.

"I think you just need to give yourself some space from all of it for a little bit." Renee suggested.

"Yeah, me too." AJ nodded, "God, when my mom finds out she is going to flip." She shook her head.

"Screw your mom. That should be the least of your worries right now." Renee shook her head.

"I just wanna hibernate from all of it." AJ sighed, pulling the blanket to her tightly as Renee patted her on the arm. She sure as hell didn't envy her friend's current situation right now.