To Wear Armour in Times of Peace: Chapter 3
Gohan exhaled deeply as he caught Videl looking at him again. "Can I help you, Videl?" He whispered.
No reply.
Not expecting anything less from the strange girl, Gohan turned to face their teacher again. He had never really understood girls. In fact, he hadn't really paid much attention to them at all until this past year. He had found himself increasingly interested in the fashion magazines Bulma received through the mail, and he often found his dreams gravitating to the scantily-clad women who graced the covers. Such simple admiration, however, didn't compare to the difficulties of interacting face-to-face with an attractive woman. Erasa's naturally flirtatious nature, Videl's gawking, and now the tight pencil skirt his professor had chosen to wear today...
He buried his face in his textbook. He had been struggling to pay attention all morning, and to no avail. He rubbed his knees together, trying to ignore the persistent bulge in his red jeans. He had woken up late this morning and hadn't had time to take care of himself in the shower. The warm sensation had faded on his flight to Orange Star High, only to come back more persistent than ever when Erasa had greeted him.
"Gohan?" The teacher asked, her expressive hands pausing in mid-air.
The hot and bothered teen straighten in his seat, face burning. "Uh, yes?"
"Please solve this problem for us," She commanded. She held a piece of chalk in her hand, silently beckoning him to the blackboard.
"Well…" he started, not sure how to refuse his superior.
The young teacher raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"
"I- I don't know how?" he lied unconvincingly. The teacher looked at him, doubtful, and Gohan released a nervous chuckle.
"Nerd Boy doesn't know something?" Sharpener called out. "Someone call the press!" Laughter rang out as the blonde jock soaked up the attention.
"One more comment like that and I'll be seeing you in detention," the teacher snapped at Sharpener.
Videl looked at Gohan oddly. She could tell his declaration hadn't been truthful, but she couldn't figure out why. Turning her focus back on the mysterious boy, she watched him carefully for another clue.
"May I use the restroom?" The half-Saiyan asked instead.
The teacher blinked in disappointment, instead hoping the boy genius would contribute to her discussion. "Sure," she relented. "After you come up here and demonstrate a proper chi square test."
Knowing he had no way out, Gohan sprang from his seat and took the stairs two at a time as he made his way down to the bottom of the amphitheater-style classroom. "Hopefully I was fast enough to avoid detection, but slow enough to not arouse suspicion," he thought, but winced at his poor word choice.
The boy scribbled his work on the chalkboard with an obvious haste. Sending an apologetic glance to his teacher, he sidestepped toward the door. "Thanks, bye!" He said, hurtling out the door without waiting for a response.
Black dress shoes clacked softly on the linoleum floors, echoing slightly throughout the empty hall. Gohan wandered for a minute, trying to remember where he last saw a boy's bathroom.
"Ah, there you are," he told himself as he entered the small, deserted washroom. He found a sink and splashed his face with icy water. Sufficiently cold and wet, he shut his eyes in an attempt to clear his mind. He seriously didn't want to go back to class with an erection. It would be impossible to hide as he climbed the stairs to his seat!
Across the hall, his delicate hearing picked up the sound of someone milling about in the teacher's lounge. He concentrated on it, hoping to keep his mind occupied for the time being. Several moments of static filled his eardrums when he heard a radio turn on. The unknown teacher promptly raised the volume before changing the station. After an assortment of music was heard from various channels, Gohan finally heard, "Traffic on 4th Avenue from Satan City Mall to Orange Star High School is being held up by a high-speed car chase. Authorities say-"
Gohan groaned in displeasure. "Why is the home of the supposed world saviour so crime-ridden?" He complained. "With all of his outrageous claims, you'd think people would actually be scared of that buffoon!"
"Who you calling buffoon?" A voice asked.
Gohan whirled around to see that two boys his age had entered the bathroom. "Uh, sorry, I was just talking to myself," he managed to say.
"Really," the larger of the two said. He whipped his OSH baseball cap off of his head, revealing a mess of brown curls. He ran a hand through his hair, as if thinking. "I always heard the smartest people were a little insane. Guess you didn't fall from that tree, huh?" His thinner friend snickered before cracking his knuckles. "Maybe if you do our chemistry homework, we can keep this our little secret," the sidekick smirked. "What do you say, brainiac?"
Gohan's fists clenched. He didn't have time for this. His hard-on had finally slipped away, and now he had to defend an entire highway of innocent people! He expanded his senses past the perimeter of the school to feel for any distressed energy signals. He found several, all in relatively close proximity.
"I'm sorry," Gohan said, a sincere apology shining through his adolescent voice.
"What are you-" The bigger bully tried to ask, but he soon found himself unable to think. Both bullies lost consciousness, dropping face-first onto the wet floor directly in front of the urinals. Standing behind them with his hands still outstretched in a chop, Gohan shuddered. "I really hope that's sink water," he muttered.
It was nearly 20 minutes later when Gohan finally returned to his classroom. Yet the class itself had been released for lunch, and few students remained.
"Gohan," the teacher called. The dark-haired boy looked around the room, seeing only his teacher and a few of his peers. Videl, one of the few stragglers, looked at him with great interest. Gohan swallowed hard before turning his attention back on the teacher.
"Miss," the boy began, "I apologize for taking off so quickly-"
"Nonsense," the teacher said. She looked up at the other students before lowering her voice. "I'm the one who should be apologizing. I wouldn't have made you come to the front if I had known you had something you needed to… take care of."
"Um," Gohan said stupidly, eyes wide in a panic. "Damn it," he mentally told himself. "You've been the Gold Fighter for two days and your secret identity has already been compromised!"
The teacher nodded. "This is Biology class, Gohan. Let's just say it's perfectly natural, okay? The same thing happened to a boy in my class last year."
Gohan's face burned bright red, possibly a shade or two darker than his pants, as he realized she had been talking about his erection. "Wait, what! I don't know what you mean, I swear!" He practically yelled, waving his hands in front of his face.
"Next time," the teacher said, kindly, "just tell me you're feeling sick and I'll let you go to the bathroom sooner. Alright? You didn't miss much, so it's not that big of a deal so long as you keep your grades up. Or better yet, you can even answer from your seat if you don't want to risk getting up. I can't say I know what it's like, but I certainly don't want to embarrass you in front of everyone."
Mortified beyond belief, the tongue-tied teenager simply nodded, eyes glued to the floor in shame as his female teacher talked to him about his penis.
"Like I said, you're at that age where it just happens," she whispered with a shrug. "Also, for homework, I'm assigning all of the problems on page 79 in your text. They're all chi square problems to practice, so you shouldn't have any issues. Now go get some lunch, dear." The curvy woman gathered her leather briefcase in one hand before strolling out of the classroom, completely calm about the entire ordeal.
Large, calloused hands covered Gohan's face as he struggled to compose himself. "I saved a dozen lives today, and this is the thanks I get." It dawned on him that he had spoken out loud, and he quickly removed his hands. Only the empty classroom stood before him. "Well," he thought, "at least that secret is safe."
Videl stood in the crowded hallway, grinning as she saw their biology teacher leave the classroom. "So that's what he's hiding," she mumbled. "Or at least, one of the things he's hiding."
She ran to catch up to Sharpener and Erasa, but not before resolving to confront Gohan at lunch.
"Hey, Gohan!" Erasa chriped. "What took you so long?"
Gohan took a seat next to Sharpener, across from Erasa and Videl. Sharpener scooted away slightly, but Gohan pretended not to notice.
"Oh, nothing," he said. "Just had to talk to the teacher." He laughed, dismayed at how bad his lying truly was.
"Really, Gohan?" Videl spoke up. "What about?"
"Ah," he said, racking his brain for a suitable answer. "She just wanted to tell me what work I missed is all."
"Really?" Videl retorted, a mischievous look flashing across her face. "Because I heard the Gold Fighter struck again."
Gohan tilted his head in confusion. "Gold Fighter?"
"And he was reportedly around six feet tall, with spiky hair. He was even said to be wearing the same red jeans as you are," she told him. "Coincidence?"
Sudden realization hit him, and Gohan felt his heart pound in his throat.
"Oh, that mysterious fighter in the news?" Erasa piped up. "I know what you're thinking, Videl. There's no way Gohan could be the Gold Fighter! He doesn't have golden hair, silly."
"What do you say, Gohan?" Videl asked, leaning over her lunch tray to get a better look at the half-Saiyan. "Why weren't you in class at either of the times he was spotted?"
"Videl," Sharpener scoffed. "Have you seen how his clothes hang off him? I doubt he even knows how to throw a punch, let alone catch bullets."
"Well?" Videl insisted, still staring at the sweaty, dark-haired boy. She pulled out her cell phone, showing Gohan a breaking news bulletin that flashed across the screen.
"Well," he muttered. "The first day was a little overwhelming. I kind of had a panic attack and got sent home."
"Oh! I'm sorry, Gohan," Erasa comforted, eyes wide in concern. "Are you feeling okay now?"
Gohan smiled gratefully at her. "I am, thanks," he said, and he meant it. "Today, I…" He trailed off, realizing he couldn't tell Videl why he had initially left the classroom.
"Yes?" Videl persisted, a thin arch raised above one blue eye.
He sighed. "Look… it's embarrassing, okay? I don't want to talk about it." He grabbed his lunch capsule from his pocket and released his lunch onto the table. A stack of eight bento boxes appeared before him, and the friends at his table balked.
"You're not really going to eat all that, are you?" Sharpener said with a frown.
Videl rolled her eyes. "Don't try to lie to me and tell me you were actually in bathroom the whole time. I heard you talking to the teacher about 'taking care' of something!"
"Videl!" Erasa reprimanded, bringing a hand to her forehead in exasperation.
Gohan flushed, but reluctantly told himself he needed to lie in order to hide his real reason. "Damn, you caught me, Videl," he cringed. "I have... stomach issues. I mean, look how much I eat!" He laughed, hoping his answer would satisfy the curious girl.
"Gross, dude," Sharpener said. "No one needed to know that."
"Not buying it, Gohan," Videl informed him, her lean arms crossed. "So that means you must be the Gold Fighter. I don't know how, but your physical description fits almost perfectly."
"Really, Videl? I look like him, golden hair and all?" Gohan sighed sarcastically. "Okay, so I wasn't sick. But I really was in the bathroom."
"For twenty minutes?" She countered.
Before he could think of a retort, Sharpener burst out in hearty laughter, a cruel grin plastered to his chiseled face. All eyes turned to him as the others wondered what had their narcissistic friend in hysterics.
"Damn, Nerd Boy," he wheezed. "I didn't know you had it in you."
"What are you talking about?" Videl asked, put off by the sudden change in atmosphere. She clearly didn't like being out of the loop.
"I did the same thing once in middle school, dude," the blonde boy continued, turning to face Gohan. "You should know now to deal with it at our age, but I guess since you were always homeschooled, you didn't know what else to do, huh?"
Gohan, Videl, and Erasa simply blinked, none of them sure what Sharpener hinted at. Seeing their befuddled looks, Sharpener sobered up just enough to tell them. "Isn't it obvious?" He said. "Well, on second thought, maybe it's only obvious to me since I'm a guy, but… He left to jack off."
Though he had never heard that particular term before, Gohan knew he had been discovered for the second time that day. He from groaned and covered his face so the girls wouldn't see his flushed cheeks.
While Videl looked at Gohan in utter shock, Erasa stifled a laugh. "Aw, it's okay, Gohan," she said. "No wonder you looked so distracted during class."
"Yeah," Sharpener quickly agreed, elated he had found a way to humiliate the new boy. "But you really shouldn't try to take care of it everytime it happens. Not when you're in school, anyway."
"Please stop," Gohan begged, tears stinging his eyes as the shy teen mentally grasped for a change of topic. "I swear I wasn't, Sharpener! I was just waiting it out, I promise!"
Uncomfortable, Videl cleared her throat. She had really thought she had figured out Gohan's secret. He seemed like such a naive, innocent boy from the way he acted. She never would have guessed he had been masterbating while the Gold Fighter had been saving lives right across the street! She coughed once more, feeling rather embarrassed herself for jumping to such an outrageous conclusion. "Gohan, the Gold Fighter?" She mumbled. "Seriously, what was I thinking?"
Erasa nodded her agreement as she reached over to lightly tap one of Gohan's hands, which still clung tightly to his face. "Come on, cutie," she whispered. "He's only gonna make fun of you more if he sees how much it bothers you." Knowing she was right, the meek boy carefully peeled his hands from his face, which had turned bright red in the heat of the moment.
"I, uh, brought you some cake," he blurted out. His averted eyes rested on Erasa's surprised face. "You know… 'cause I ate your whole slice yesterday. Sorry about that."
She grinned. "It's okay," she laughed. "As long as it's chocolate, of course."
Feeling his face fade to it's normal milky shade, the boy unsheathed one of his bento boxes to reveal a fat slice of dark cake, drizzled in a sweet, caramel sauce. Erasa squealed in delight as she dove her fork into it.
"Mm," she moaned, licking her lips. "I love it, Gohan! Did you make this yourself?"
"Oh, of course not!" Gohan said. "My… grandma made it. She cooks all the time." Images of Bulma's mother stuffing his 12-year-old self with an assortment of treats filled his mind, and he beamed at the memories.
"Well, tell your grandma I love her," Erasa said through a wad of cake. "Oops. Sorry," she said, covering her full mouth as she spoke again.
The group soon moved onto more mundane topics, such as their heavy load of homework, but Gohan simply thanked Erasa for presenting an opportunity to change the topic of conversation. Videl, while still thoroughly ashamed about her blunder, largely ignored most of the talk flowing beside her.
"If Gohan isn't the Gold Fighter," she thought, "then who is?"
