Chpt 16

Heart Berserk

*Flashback*

Rangiku Matsumoto stood at the entrance of the infirmary, her heart heavy with grief. She had watched as her captain, Toshiro Hitsugaya, and Sayuri had just came to terms about what happened, their faces etched in sorrow. They had just lost their child, and the grief was unbearable. Rangiku wanted to do something, anything, to make them feel better, but all she could do was stand there, feeling helpless.

Byakuya Kuchiki stood a few steps behind her, his normally stoic expression replaced with one of deep concern. Rangiku could feel the tension emanating from him and knew that he too wanted to offer some comfort but was unsure how.

Rangiku turned around immediately, her voice echoing off the walls of the infirmary. "You have to respect their privacy!" she shouted, her fists shaking in rage.

Byakuya stood with his back to her, his hands clasped together in stoic resolve. He said nothing.

Rangiku's anger only seemed to grow. "Captain Toshiro and Sayuri just lost their child—they deserve respect!" she said.

Byakuya sighed. He turned to face her, his dark eyes gazing at her steadily. "Rangiku, you know I am not one to judge anyone," he said quietly. "I do not wish to cause them any more pain."

Rangiku's anger drained away, replaced by sorrow, and understanding. Tears gathered in her eyes as she shook her head. "No, Byakuya...they have already endured too much."

Byakuya nodded, a moment of sad reflection passing between them. "Yes."

Rangiku bowed her head and took a deep breath, forcing herself to be strong. "This is not just about them," she said. "It is about all of us. We must show compassion for those who have suffered a loss, especially those of us who have not had to endure it ourselves."

Byakuya nodded again, his face showing no emotion. "I understand," he said. "I will do my best."

Rangiku gave him a small smile of gratitude. "Thank you," she said. "I know this is not easy...for either of us."

Byakuya said nothing, but he gave her a slight nod of acknowledgement.

Rangiku looked around the infirmary, taking in the sadness that lingered in the air. She could feel the pain of grief that permeated the very walls. In this moment, it seemed like nothing would ever be the same again.

Rangiku walked slowly towards the door, pausing for a long moment before she opened it. She glanced back at Byakuya, her eyes sad and her mouth set in a grim line. Without a word, they both knew that things would never be the same again.

It was a moment of sad reflection, but it was also a moment of hope. It was a reminder that, no matter how deep the despair is, there will always be someone to lend a hand and provide comfort.

The silence was thick and oppressive, and neither of them spoke. Then, finally, Rangiku made the first move. She stepped forward and extended her hand towards Byakuya.

He looked at her hand, then up at her face, before taking it in his. He squeezed it tightly, and for a moment, they just stood there, united in their grief and sorrow.

Then, Rangiku said, her voice soft and gentle, "Let's give them some privacy."

Byakuya nodded. "Of course."

The two of them stepped away from the entrance to the infirmary, careful not to make a sound that could disturb Toshiro and Sayuri.

As they walked, Rangiku felt the warmth of Byakuya's hand in hers, a reassurance that he was still there for her. She looked up at him and realized that he was suffering just as deeply as she was. Tears formed in her eyes, and she was glad that, in that moment, they could share their pain together.

They moved away from the infirmary and into a shaded area of the compound. Rangiku leaned against the tree, and Byakuya stood beside her. Once again, they fell into a comfortable silence, the two of them just taking comfort in each other's presence.

Finally, Rangiku spoke. Her voice was soft and gentle, but her words were filled with conviction.

"We must give them space and time to heal," she said. "We must not intrude upon their grief."

Byakuya nodded in agreement. He knew that it was the right thing to do.

"They need to be able to grieve in their own way, in their own time," Rangiku continued. "We must give them the respect they deserve."

Rangiku felt a surge of admiration for Byakuya. Despite his usually stern demeanor, in that moment he was showing a side of himself that she had never seen before.

"Yes," he said. "We must."

Byakuya smiled, albeit sadly. "We will give them the compassion they need."

Rangiku smiled in return, her heart filling with warmth. She squeezed Byakuya's hand and, together, they stood there, beneath the tree, in silent contemplation of Toshiro and Sayuri.

Rangiku turned and started to leave, her chin held high and her heart heavy. Leaving behind the weight of grief and the emptiness of loss.

•• ━━━━━ ••✾•• ━━━━━ •••• ━━━━━ ••✾••

Toshiro's voice was a hoarse whisper as he spoke. "I thought of our child as a treasure, a precious thing that I had to protect. And now, it is gone." His voice was thick with sorrow as he spoke of his lost child, and the other captains began to understand why he had kept the news of the unborn a secret.

"In my foolish optimism, I had hoped that somehow I could keep our child out of harm's way; however, that hope came crashing down on us when I failed them both." "I should have never let her fight." Toshiro broke into tears as he spoke. With anguish he bowed his head in shame.

"Toshiro, we understand your grief. You did what was possible; but why didn't you inform us earlier of her pregnancy?" One captain finally spoke up.

Toshiro looked up at the captain, his expression one of intense hatred. "Do you not hear the gossip going around now in the seireitei! No one was supposed to know until the time was right for her safety! No one could have done anything. You could have done nothing to save our child that I could not. I chose to take on the burden alone and I will bare the consequences myself."

Toshiro's words were full of sorrow and determination; each captain could only look on in silence as Toshiro accepted responsibility for his loss himself, earning admiration and respect from them all.

Toshiro then turned his gaze towards Sayuri in the infirmary, where she lay sleeping since finding out the loss of their child and Kaien. The grief of it all may have been too much for her to bear. His gaze softened as he softly sighed. "We must do whatever we can to save her. I can only hope that the gods will spare her life, even if they could not spare our child's."

Toshiro stood back, gazing out into the night, still thinking. He had lost so much.