AN: I actually uploaded this chapter to AO3 two days ago, but didn't upload it here until now. So if you want to see the more consistent updates, I recommend you go to my AO3 account. (You can find it in my profile.) Anyways, here is Chapter 2! It's a bit longer than I'd usually write, but I hope you like it!
Disclaimer: I do not own Warriors. Erin Hunter does.
"Leafpool and Crowfeather?"
Squirrelflight has been repeating the same three words over and over again, and Lionpaw wonders when this will ever end.
"You — you — my sister… had kits?" the she-cat is pacing around the clearing, her ginger pelt bushed up in alarm. "Leafpool's alive?"
"Yes," Hollypaw says calmly, looking at the agitated she-cat with an expression akin to pity. "She's alive, and she's our mother."
"It's not real," Squirrelflight insists. "It can't be real."
Spiderleg, the wiry brown and black tom accompanying the patrol, sighs. "Calm down," he says, without looking at Lionpaw and his littermates. "We can deal with these three later." The way he says these three makes Lionpaw's body turn cold. This tom, whom they have never met before, already has something against them. And why? Because of their blood? Because of the way their parents shattered the warrior code? Maybe we shouldn't have come here, Lionpaw thinks with a sense of rising dread.
"No!" Squirrelflight paces up and down the clearing, oblivious to everyone and everything. "Why didn't she tell me? She didn't need to run away. I would've helped her—"
"I'm sorry," Lionpaw says — the first time he has spoken since their arrival on ThunderClan territory. He does not know what possessed him to speak up, but the words escape his lips before he can catch them.
"What?" The ginger she-cat looks up at him, surprised.
"You lost your sister," Lionpaw says. "I would be upset, too."
Jaypaw turns around and shoots him a Lionpaw-are-you-crazy-what-are-you-doing look. Although his brother cannot see, it does not make his expression any less chilling. He knows exactly what Jaypaw is trying to tell him. Don't mess this up.
"I — " Squirrelflight's voice breaks, and the look in her eyes (green — green like Hollypaw's) are that of a cat who is struggling with all of her might to keep herself from breaking. "I'm sorry, I — I can't do this right now."
"Then it's settled," Spiderleg says, his tone detatched, "We'll bring them to camp and let Firestar decide what to do with them. It shouldn't take long."
Squirrelflight nods wordlessly. Lionpaw notices that her lips are quivering slightly, as if there are words that she cannot get out.
"Are you going to join the Clan?" Mousepaw asks, causing a break in the thick silence. The gray and white apprentice's voice is cheerful and bright, a clear contrast to that of his companions. "It'd be really cool if you did. It's so boring around here."
Spiderleg faces the apprentice with a stern stare. "Mousepaw," he says, his voice cold. "These cats are not going to join the Clan unless Firestar says so, and I see absolutely no reason for him to allow such a thing."
Squirrelflight makes a noise, as if she is about to say something, to protest. But she stops, thinking better of it. Does she want us here? Lionpaw asks himself. When his mother told him stories about the she-cat, she'd always said that Squirrelflight was brave and determined, never letting anything get in her way. But if she doesn't want us in the Clan, she'll stop at nothing to make us leave.
He is only vaguely aware of his surroundings as he follows the ThunderClan cats through the forest, to where their camp is located. The sky is dim, and so it is difficult for him to make out the details of everything that is around him. But the ThunderClan forest is familiar to him in a way he cannot understand. It is as if he is finally returning to a home he has never known, and it both excites and scares him.
When their companions are not looking, Hollypaw shoots Lionpaw and Jaypaw a look. After more than six moons of his every waking moment spent with his littermates, Lionpaw is able to decipher most expressions of theirs. And in this case, Hollypaw's green eyes are telling them to stay-to-the-script-or-you'll-regret-it.
Jaypaw, (who Lionpaw swears can read minds), shoots her a the-script-is-dumb-and-you-know-it look.
Hollypaw makes a face at him, and Lionpaw has to hold in a purr of amusement. Even though they're in such a grave situation, his littermates will keep on arguing until the world burns down.
After what seems like an eternity of trekking through wooded clearings, the six cats approach the front of what looks to be a thorn barrier. Clearly, this is a measure taken by ThunderClan to prevent outsiders from getting inside the camp. In this case, we're the potential threats that the barrier wants to keep out, Lionpaw realizes with a pang.
(This doesn't help his nerves at all.)
"Squirrelflight," Spiderleg gestured at the ginger she-cat coolly. "You can take them to Firestar. I'm going to get some sleep. Mousepaw, you come with me. I don't want you stirring up any trouble."
Squirrelflight nods once, her expression indecipherable. Lionpaw realizes that her flame-colored pelt is pressed tightly to her skin, as if she is wary of something, someone…
But then they are alone, just the four of them, and her expression changes. She stares at them, her eyes as wide as two moons.
"Where is she?" she demands. "Leafpool — where is she?"
"She's not here," Hollypaw replies, still calm — so calm. "She sent us here so we could be Clan cats, like we've always wanted."
"But she's alive," Squirrelflight breathes, as if she's unaware of Hollypaw's words. "I knew she had to be alive."
Her gaze darts to the three of them, slowly passing through them one by one. "And you're actually her kits?"
"Obviously," Jaypaw says. "Just look at Lionpaw."
Lionpaw feels her gaze land on him, and his pelt prickles with tension. "You look just like her." The ginger she-cat's eyes cloud over with the weight of a thousand memories. "Your tabby markings. Your ears. Your eyes."
He knows that out of his littermates, he is the one who most takes after his mother, after ThunderClan. It has always been nothing more than a simple fact to him. But to hear Squirrelflight say it means more to him than anything, because it is as if in a small way, he actually belongs to ThunderClan.
"If you're here," Squirrelflight says suddenly, "then where is she?"
"She let us come here so we could join ThunderClan," Hollypaw says, "but she's happy where she is."
"No." The she-cat's eyes are filled with an intense longing. "No, no, no, no. I have to see her. I have to talk to her again."
Lionpaw finds himself speaking up once again, against his will. "She said to tell you," he mews, his voice slightly rough, "that she misses you and loves you so very much."
"If she really loved me," Squirrelflight says with a hard edge to her voice, "why doesn't she come home?"
Neither Hollypaw, Jaypaw, nor Lionpaw have an answer to that. Instead, Lionpaw finds his heart aching with grief for the two seperated sisters. As a kit, he'd always wondered why Leafpool always seemed sad when she told stories about her sister. But now, he understands everything. He can't imagine the pain that would come with losing Hollypaw or Jaypaw, who are so essential to his very being.
"I'm sorry," Squirrelflight says quickly, catching herself. "It's not your fault. You're just kits."
"She loves you so much," Hollypaw says, her voice soft. "She told us stories about you."
Squirrelflight purrs weakly, "Which ones?"
"The ice story, for one," Hollypaw says, green eyes glowing as she relives the countless hours spent listening to their mother's soft voice tell stories. "We all enjoyed hearing about the time you decided to go hunting on ice —"
"All right, that's enough!" At this point, there is definite laughter in the ginger she-cat's voice. She purrs, moving over to where the three apprentices are standing. Lionpaw feels surprised when she curls her bushy tail around him and his littermates and presses her nose to their cheeks, as if they were her kits, but he welcomes the action. It makes him feel like he is a kit again, with his mother who smells so much like Squirrelflight, wrapped around him.
"Lionpaw. Hollypaw. Jaypaw." Squirrelflight repeats their names one by one, letting them roll off of her tongue. "I'm actually offended she didn't name one of you Squirrelpaw."
"She wanted to," Lionpaw says, "but she thought one of you was already too much for the world."
The ginger she-cat purrs with amusement, giving Lionpaw a lick on the cheek, touching their flanks together. And then the four cats settle into a brief period of period of comfortable silence as the sky grows darker and darker, and the stars start to come out, illuminating the sky. It is only then when they realize how late it is.
"We should get going," Jaypaw says irritably. "I want to get some sleep."
Squirrelflight stands up, gesturing towards the direction of the ThunderClan camp. "I'll take you to camp, then, and introduce you to Firestar and Sandstorm. They'll be so glad to meet you."
Relief, pure unfiltered relief floods over Lionpaw. Maybe they've gotten off to a rough start, but at least Squirrelflight is on their side. Squirrelflight, who is brave and persevering and whom they have heard so many stories about. But whether it is enough, he does not know.
"But what if the Clan doesn't accept us?" Hollypaw echoes Lionpaw's thoughts.
Squirrelflight's eyes burn bright with green fires. "Then they've got another thing coming."
The first emotion that goes through him when he enters the ThunderClan camp is sheer wonder at the amount of cats. For most of his kithood, Lionpaw lived alone with his littermates and parents, and only occasionally would they meet other cats. The few fleeting times they had gotten to play with the kits of passing loners seemed like gifts from StarClan.
And now… now there are dozens of cats right in front of them. They are of all ages, from two kits, one ginger tabby and one white, playing outside, to an older dusky brown she-cat, sitting with a disgruntled look on her face. Despite it being nighttime, the bustling nature of the ThunderClan camp shocks Lionpaw to his core. And by the way that Jaypaw's ears are flattened and Hollypaw's eyes are wide in alarm, he can tell that his littermates feel the same.
There is no lack of stares and whispers directed at them as they enter the camp. He can sense dozens and dozens of narrowed eyes on him and his littermates, judging them. Although the stares and whispers make him nervous, he tries his best to ignore them and look straight ahead, dignified and noble like a warrior should be.
"Mousepaw!" A small gray tabby she-cat is bounding towards the group. Her excited blue eyes shine as she looks Hollypaw, Lionpaw, and Jaypaw up and down. Lionpaw's pelt grows hot with embarrassment from the attention, but he doesn't let it show. "Are these the cats you were talking about?"
"Of course! Just look at them, Cinderpaw!" replies Mousepaw, who has apparently not finished regalling his fellow apprentices with the exciting tale. "They're the cats we found at the border! And guess who their parents are?"
Squirrelflight flicks Mousepaw's shoulder with her tail. "Not now," she hisses, causing Lionpaw to feel a rush of gratitude towards his mother's sister.
"Squirrelflight!" Now it is a pale ginger she-cat running towards them. She is older, with green eyes that are paler than that of Hollypaw's and Squirrelflight's. But there is something excruciatingly familiar about her, something that Lionpaw cannot place.
"What's the meaning of this?" the pale ginger she-cat asks, screeching to a halt in front of them.
"Sandstorm, I need to talk to Firestar," Squirrelflight says. "Now."
Sandstorm. The meaningful glances that Hollypaw and Jaypaw are sharing tell him that they have realized the same thing. Sandstorm is slender and lithe with glossy fur like Leafpool — just like Leafpool. The pale ginger fur is so reminiscent of Lionpaw's own golden pelt that it is like he is looking at a reflection of himself in a puddle. Sandstorm. This is his mother's mother, the cat that Leafpool spoke about with so much love and affection.
"I'll come with you," Sandstorm says, fixing Lionpaw, Jaypaw, and Hollypaw with an intense stare.
Squirrelflight nods, and flicks her tail, leading the cats to the base of what looks like a rockfall.
At first glance, it is disorganized and haphazard, but upon closer inspection, it is easy enough to maneuver one's way up and down. Lionpaw and Hollypaw both look at Jaypaw in concern, but the blind tom glares at them, likely resenting them for their offers of help. Nevertheless, Lionpaw rests his tail on his brother's flank, guiding him up the rockfall.
At the top of the rockfall is a ledge large enough for several cats to stand on, one that overlooks the entire camp. There is a sense of importance surrounding it, but neither Squirrelflight nor Sandstorm stop to explain it. Instead, Squirrelflight stops at the entrance of a crevice in the rock wall and calls, "Firestar!"
From inside, a voice sounds. "Come in."
Without hesitation, Squirrelflight walks into the den, leading in the other four behind her.
Inside, there is the most majestic tom that Lionpaw has ever seen. His shiny pelt is bright ginger, flame-licked, like Squirrelflight. And just like his daughter, his eyes are twin emerald fires. The way he poses himself gives him a sense of nobility that Lionpaw can only hope to achieve in nine lifetimes. This is Firestar — the leader of ThunderClan, and Lionpaw's kin.
"Squirrelflight," the tom says, puzzled. "Who are these cats?"
Sandstorm nods, settling herself down besides her mate. "What aren't you telling us?"
Squirrelflight takes a deep breath. "These—"
"Greetings. We are very thankful for your time," Lionpaw blurts out suddenly, without thinking.
Hollypaw glares at him murderously in the way that only Hollypaw can when some cat gets in the way of her plans. "Lionpaw!"
He shrugs. "What? I'm just following the script like you said."
"You're not supposed to follow the script right now!"
"Oh. Sorry."
"You two are mousebrains," adds Jaypaw helpfully.
"Anyway," Hollypaw says, casting a sideways glance at her brothers. "What we'd like to say is that we're here because we want to join the Clan."
"Your names," Firestar says. "They're apprentice names. Clan names."
"We turned six moons old half a moon ago," Hollypaw explains. "Our parents gave them to us."
"And your parents are —?"
This time, it is Squirrelflight who answers for them.
"Leafpool and Crowfeather," she says, green eyes shining with a thousand multi-layered emotions.
For a moment, there is silence as Firestar and Sandstorm stare at them. With every passing second, Lionpaw's heart pounds with dread. Would they be angry with them? Would they demand that the three of them leave the territory immediately? Would they banish them and forever dispel their hopes of becoming Clan cats? Would this entire journey turn out to be a waste of time? But it is Sandstorm who finally breaks the silence.
"She's alive." The pale ginger she-cat's voice is stung with relief. "She's alive. Oh, Leafpool."
She makes her way towards them, staring at them hungrily, as if she might never be sated. Briefly, Lionpaw feels uncomfortable at the attention of this total stranger. But the way she looks at them with so much warmth melts down the barriers in his heart.
"Is this true?" Sandstorm asks, her words thick with emotion. "You're Leafpool's kits?"
Lionpaw nods.
Sandstorm lets out a small choked noise, rushing over to the three apprentices, breathing in their scents. She presses herself against Hollypaw, and wraps her tail around Jaypaw and Lionpaw. She is warm, Lionpaw realizes. Warm like Leafpool, with the same sunshiny scent that remind him so much of home.
"I'm so glad she's all right," Sandstorm says, though Lionpaw can barely hear her over the purring. "She's coming home, isn't she? She has to be. And you three — you three remind me so much of her."
"Sandstorm —" Firestar has finally gotten his voice back. He swerves his head around, searching desperately for the daughter he cannot see. "We need to find her. I'll send a search patrol…"
"No!" Hollypaw says suddenly.
Firestar and Sandstorm look at her inquisitively. "What?"
"You can't look for her," Lionpaw says. "Not when she doesn't want to be found."
"She's happy." Jaypaw speaks for the first time since they entered the ThunderClan camp. His voice is quiet, but still decisive and clear. "She's happy with our father."
"Crowfeather," Squirrelflight says, with what seems to be a mixture of distaste and resignation in her voice. "Of course."
"He's a good father," Lionpaw says defensively.
"I'm not saying he isn't," Squirrelflight says. "I'm just saying —"
Saying what? That he shattered the code to pieces? That he took your sister from you? That you wish he had never met our mother? But Squirrelflight's next words are surprising.
"I'm just saying that you three look just like him." And then something changes in her gaze. "And her."
For some time, the room is silent as the six cats all struggle for words. Lionpaw cannot help but feel smug that Hollypaw's follow-the-script plan is not working out so well, but he doesn't express it. Instead, he sits in a den with the family he has never met before and thinks quietly.
"You said you wanted to join ThunderClan?" Firestar asks, breaking the long silence. Besides Lionpaw, Hollypaw immediately straightens up. This is what she is here for.
"We'd like to join ThunderClan so we can experience Clan life for ourselves," she begins. "We believe that the fundamental ideals of Clan life enriches and enhances—"
"What she means," Jaypaw interrupts, "is that yes, we would like to join ThunderClan."
"Did Leafpool send you here?" Sandstorm asks.
"She did," Lionpaw says. "We've been begging her to let us see the Clans for ages. Now that we're six moons old, she finally let us go."
"I want to see her," Sandstorm says. For a moment, her eyes blaze with the same fire as Squirrelflight's. "She's my daughter. I have to see her."
Lionpaw sighs. "I'm sorry."
"She told us," Hollypaw says, "to tell you that she couldn't have had a better mother. And that she wishes things were different."
"I know," Sandstorm says, her eyes swimming with sadness. "So do I."
There is another period of awkward silence, as none of the cats know what to say. But the silence is broken by Hollypaw, who has clearly waited long enough for her moment to shine.
"So can we?" she asks, broaching the question that they had travelled all this way to ask. "Can we join the Clan?"
Firestar does not answer immediately. Instead, he leans down to lap at his shiny ginger pelt. "Clearly, the Clan wouldn't be very welcoming toward outsiders," he begins finally.
Lionpaw's heart drops. After they traveled all this way, for half a moon, this is how their journey is going to end. He opens his mouth to speak, to protest, but Squirrelflight beats him to it.
"You have to let them join the Clan!" she exclaims, striding right in front of her father. "They're Leafpool's kits! They have a right to be here! Who cares what other cats say? We've already lost her. We can't afford to lose more family!"
"These are our grandkits, Firestar!" Sandstorm adds. "They have a right to be here! And look at how young they are! You can't just turn them away!"
Lionpaw is frozen as he watches the back-and-forth between the three cats. He feels a sense of intense gratitude toward Squirrelflight and Sandstorm, whom they have known for less than a day, but are already vouching for them like they were family. Which we are.
Firestar purrs with amusement. "That's not what I was going to say. I was saying that these three apprentices can join the Clan, as long as they are willing to stay loyal to it for the rest of their lives."
He looks at them with intense eyes. "If you join the Clan, you will have to make many sacrifices. All of the cats you knew in your life before, you will likely not see again. Your parents — if they want to avoid contact with the Clans like you say — will not see you frequently. You will have to devote yourself to StarClan and the warrior code for the rest of your life. Are you prepared to do so?"
Hollypaw responds first. Her voice is crisp and clear, without any trace of hesitation. "I am."
Lionpaw envies her decisiveness, her lack of doubt. He can never be Hollypaw, all bright and confident and powerful, bending cats to her will with her metallic words. But he can be Lionpaw, and maybe that is enough.
He takes a moment to think, to reflect on his life before the Clans. He remembers Leafpool's warmth and her soft pelt, Crowfeather's calm blue eyes. The field dotted with trees that they grew up in. The moments he and his littermates spent playing in the sun as their parents watched and purred. Can I really leave that all behind? But as soon as he asks himself that question, he knows his answer. And so he says, "Yes."
"Jaypaw?" Hollypaw looks to their brother, whose tail is wrapped around himself.
The gray tom hesitates, and then nods wordlessly.
"Then it's settled," Firestar says, standing up. "We'll announce it to the Clan, and then you three can spend the night in the apprentice's den. In the morning, we'll figure everything out."
As they begin to leave the den, Firestar turns back to face the three littermates. His (Hollypaw's— always Hollypaw's) eyes are hollow and Lionpaw cannot stand seeing them this way.
"If you see your mother," Firestar mews, "please tell her to come home."
And then he leaves the den, taking with him the last memories of a lost daughter.
"Cats of ThunderClan! I have an announcement to make!"
If meeting Firestar and Sandstorm was scary, then being introduced to the entire Clan is completely terrifying, Lionpaw thinks. He can't help how his legs wobble slightly as he stands on Highrock, or how his fur presses close to his pelt, making him look abnormally small. There are dozens of cats staring up at them, wondering. He can hear them say things, things that do not make him feel any better about where he is.
"Who are they?"
"Are they rogues? Loners?"
"Are they going to join the Clan?"
Firestar straightens on Highrock, and all the cats fall silent. It is a testament to how effective he is as a leader, and it impresses Lionpaw to no end.
"You may have noticed," the ginger pelted tom begins, "that these three cats — Hollypaw, Lionpaw, and Jaypaw — have arrived at our camp."
Immediately, all the gazes of the ThunderClan cats fall back on Lionpaw, Hollypaw, and Jaypaw. He can feel the hot stares burning into him, but he is determined not to let it faze him. He will be like Hollypaw, who is upright and proud, green eyes shining with a sort of brave defiance. And so he straightens himself up, puffs out his chest, and repeats to himself over and over: I am a warrior, I am a warrior, I am a —
"They wish to join ThunderClan," Firestar continues.
The eruption of voices down below is immediate, and they are loud and raucous and hostile, burning Lionpaw like a raging fire. There are protests, insults, and other things he cannot and does not want to hear clearly.
"What right do they have to join the Clan?" a golden-brown tom with narrowed eyes shouts from below. "What will the other Clans think of us for taking in more outsiders? You saw Blackstar at the last Gathering…"
Firestar, despite all of the tension and hostility, retains his composure. "This is not the business of the other Clans, and we should not concern ourselves with how they view us," he replies. "And as for their right to be here…"
Besides him, he can hear Hollypaw take in a sharp breath, and he presses himself against her, telling her that everything will be okay, even though he knows he is lying.
"These are Leafpool's kits," Firestar says simply.
The shock on the faces of the cats below could be considered almost comical. For a few moments, the hollow is entirely silent as the cats try to comprehend what was said. The silence is short-lived, as the crowd then bursts into a string of shouts and questions and accusations.
"Leafpool's alive?"
"She had kits?"
"With Crowfeather?"
"That's against the code!"
Lionpaw wishes right there and then that the ground would open up and swallow him whole. He begins to question if he really wants to be here, in a Clan of cats who distrust him because of the blood running through his veins. He is not Hollypaw, who can persevere through any challenge based on sheer stubbornness, or Jaypaw, who simply does not care if others dislike him. No, he is Lionpaw: golden, bright, and fragile.
But down in the crowd, Squirrelflight is staring at him intensely with her green green eyes, and it is like she is begging him to stay, like she is retrieving the memories of her lost sister through him. And so he gathers the strength to sit through the din, to carry on.
"These apprentices have a right to be here, as they are half ThunderClan," Firestar says, once the hollow has (somewhat) quieted down. "And so we shall welcome them to the Clan."
"They're half-Clan," says a light brown tabby tom. "The kits of a medicine cat and WindClan warrior. Not only do they go against StarClan and the warrior code, but by letting them join the Clan, aren't we giving the other Clans the incentive to view us as weak?"
Lionpaw feels his blood run cold. They have been in the ThunderClan camp for such a short time, yet there are already cats with a strong dislike for them. And it isn't for anything we can help, either, he thinks bitterly. It's the blood that runs in our veins. He senses Jaypaw tensing up besides him, probably about to snap at the tom for his comment. But before he can, Squirrelflight interrupts him, her ginger fur bushed out so much that she looks twice her size.
"I'll have you know, Birchfall, that these kits have done nothing to deserve punishment. They didn't break the code. They are innocent," she says bitingly.
The tom blanches. "But —"
"They can stay here as long as they want," Squirrelflight continues. "They have ThunderClan blood in their veins."
She sits down, leaving the tom without words.
"I expect you to welcome these three apprentices into the Clan, as they are your Clanmates," Firestar says, pretending he didn't just hear the confrontation. "They will sleep in the apprentice's den tonight and will be assigned mentors first thing tomorrow."
Ignoring the storm of conversation that springs from the cats below, the ginger tom turns and walks back into his den, apparently satisfied with his speech. For a moment, the three apprentices are frozen with hesitation as the Clan looks up at them, scrutinizing every part of their beings.
But for the first time since his arrival, Lionpaw feels hopeful, like the future could go right. He and Hollypaw and Jaypaw are finally where they want to be, together, no matter the challenges of the future.
We made it. We've joined ThunderClan.
"Well," Lionpaw says, turning to Hollypaw with a smug grin on his face. "So much for following the script."
And that's a wrap! Please remember to review with your comments/feedback!
- likeaprilskies
