Roshi: Welcome back. Today's chapter is very special. Today, I take up the pen and paper and I'm writing the chapter!

Cell: Roshi, you are not.

Roshi: YES I AM GODDAMN IT!

Just let him believe.

Cell: Fine...

Roshi: Now then, today, I will be telling you all about my date with a lucky gal, and my most faithful supporter who is not Jesus...

Chapter 6:

Roshi's Date

So there I was, standing back to back with Jesus. A bible in my right hand, a can of Coke in my left, drinking on the streets of what used to be the streets of my empire of Cooch. I was down to my last can, so I asked Jesus from the seat where I sat. I said, "Jesus, this is the last can of Coke."

Jesus said, "Shit. Did we really drink all of it?"

I nodded. "We drank all 24 cans of Coke my dear friend... yes we did..."

Jesus sighed. I couldn't blame him. After the Coochie Wars, our lives went to shit. I was no longer king. He lost most of his empire. All we had left were each other... well, Jesus still had the Christians, but even they weren't enough for him.

The event of the Coochie Wars scarred us for life, and left us broke... mostly.

"Roshi..." My dear friend began, "maybe it's time to... I don't know... give up on rebuilding the empire."

I looked at my friend, my lone supporter, in shock. "You don't really think we should give up the dreams of rebuilding the Coochie Empire?"

"Roshi, look around you," he said. "Everyone here has their own cooch. Even if it isn't the best like we once had, but everyone now has cooch. Maybe... Maybe this is how it's supposed to be."

He was right... everyone did have cooch. Sure, they were all different. One guy had a average beautiful high school girl, another had a beautiful women who looked like one of my slaves who was in their mid-twenties or thirties yet the boy looked like a 15 year old high school boy. Hell, a man had a girl who was a furry and looked hot as hell.

I sighed. "Maybe... maybe..."

My friend nodded as he stood up. I stood up too as we finally parted ways.

That was before the scream.

At first, I thought my daydreams of the Coochie Wars were making that scream. It happens a lot. But then, I heard it again and I looked up. I knew that was not a daydream. It sounded too real.

I immediately started running with my plastic bag filled with empty cans of Coke towards the scream. It was in a back alley, I saw three men with a familiar mask on.

The mask of the Eight Precepts of Cooch; my sworn enemies in the Coochie Wars.

These bastards killed all women who were hot as hell. They lure them into back alleys, and then killed them. Simple as that.

"So, you bastards are still around," I said, really pissed at what they were trying to do.

They turned. "Shit, it's that Roshi guy from the Coochie Wars!" One of them said.

"You mean that guy who stood next to Jesus?!" Another questioned.

"Yeah! We're fucked if he's here!" The first said.

"You bet damn right you are!" I yelled as I threw my bag at the first, took him out instantly.

"Shit! He killed Billy!" The second exclaimed.

"You bastard!" said the third.

"Yet you three were the ones who were killing someone just like you did in the Coochie Wars," I said.

The two grunted, as they knew they were royally fucked. The second grabbed Billy. "Just wait! Our boss will hear about this! And then you're fucked!" The two ran away.

"Th-Thank you for saving me..." the fourth person, the women, said.

"You're wel-" I began before I saw the hot babe she was.

She had long green hair that went to her waist, and my god, she looked like she worked out a lot. Jesus, it felt like a hot summer day. Her eyes were honest, sincere, and looked deep and mesmerizing. She wore white T-Shirt, a blank one that showed a bit of her bust. She wore jeans that were tight on her ass, but made her look good. She had a cut on her arm though, a fresh knife cut.

"-come..." I finished. She was super hot!

"I-Is something wrong?" She asked. A innocent women. Nice.

"N-No. It's just, those people were apart of a group that I was the main enemy of back in the Great Coochie Wars," I explained.

Her eyes widened. "Wait, the Coochie Wars? I've been researching that war for awhile now. Were you apart of it?"

"I was the one who ended that war sweetheart. Yessirree I remember it like it was yesterday," I said.

Her eyes sparkled as she ran up to me. "Could you please tell me the war? I've been researching it for a long time and I never found an accurate story about it." Then she stopped for a moment. "Oh, my apologies. I'm Ibara Shiozaki... mister...?"

"Master, Roshi... I am Master Roshi, ex-king of the Coochie Empire that fell and became this here city," I said.

Her eyes widened. "You're that war hero from the war!" She realize which I nodded to confirm. She was clearly excited. Really excited.

"Yes I was..." I said.

"Can... you please tell me the story?" She asked.

"Young women, this story is longer than 1 day, and besides... it's not that interesting..." I admitted.

She pulled out her phone. "Then can you put in your number so we could meet up and I could listen to it? I want to hear the whole story," she said, and much to my surprise I actually did put in my number.

"I suppose we'll meet up write up the street, next to the orphanage," I said.

"Okay," she said.

And then she kissed me on the cheek and left.

I woke up in the hospital later that day... and I realized I had a date.

It's been two weeks now, and we finished the story yesterday. Shiozaki was a amazing lady might I say. She really was. In fact, today, she asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with her. I never had went to the mobies before so I accepted. And now we both sat in a movie theater watching a movie.

At first, I wondered why she asked me to come out to the movies... I honestly thought she just wanted to hang out...

Until the movie had ended... and we went to the lake.

She stood at the water's edge and looked like an angel. The way the sun had set and the wayer glistened just made her seem more angelic. I smiled.

"Never have I had so much fun before in my life," I said.

"Not even during the Coochie Wars?" She asked as she looked at me.

"No, not at all..." I admitted.

She walked next to me and sat down right next to me. "Roshi..." she began. "I've been wondering..."

"Yes?"

"Have you given up on your empire?"

I was silent. "...almost. Jesus talked with me about it and I've been thinking on it. I think it might be time for me to let go. Not a single ounce of cooch has come to me and I'm broke. So yes... yes I-" I was then silenced by something amazing.

Shiozaki kissed me.

I woke up two days later in the hospital, freshly out of a coma. I looked at Shiozaki who was with me.

"Then how about I be your cooch?" She said with a bright smile. I passed out again.

I had me some cooch... and I think she was my lover now.

Roshi: It went down in history, as chapter 6...

My god...

Cell: ...damn.

Shallot: Wow, talk about plot development. Wonder when DevilArtemis will find out about this fanfic and like the bullshit in it.

When he wants... or somehow it gets leaked... eh, doesn't matter.

Roshi: Thank you all for reading today's chapter. I'm Roshi, and we're signing off. Remember to follow, favorite, and also review. See you crazy son of a bitches later.