I knew you'd fight until the war was won
But you deserve a chance to meet your son

Tonks hadn't slept the night before. It had been a month since Remus returned, only a few days since he had woken. She had sat up all night, staring at the full moon outside her window. She worried all night that Remus was too weak, that werewolves would show up.

She had visited Remus the night before, but he had told he didn't want to see her after the full moon. The idea had been insulting to her and she felt like he was pushing her away again. She wondered, if he knew about Teddy, if he would continue to push her away or if he would somehow remember their time together.

As she got ready for work, part of her hoped a letter would arrive from Remus, asking her to come see him. Tonks knew better.

It was too quiet in the department when she arrived at her desk. It was strange. There was a cup of coffee on Roofie's desk, a few cubicles away, that was still steaming.

Whoever worked this morning had left in a hurry and she wondered if there was a raid happening somewhere. She had slowly been realising over the last few weeks how much she missed raids and the more active Auror duties. She was eager to get Harry and Neville into more practical aspects of training but things kept getting in the way. The boys were receiving threats from different sources daily and Dawlish was now against the idea of them working any patrols yet.

Tonks heard footsteps approaching her, but it wasn't until he spoke that she realised who it was.

"Nymphadora Tonks. How lovely to see you made it through training. You look a little peaky, though, the dark hair washes you out."

She could feel her blood boiling as Tristan MacIver stopped beside her. "MacIver." She said curtly. "It's Auror Lupin now, by the way."

"Oh, yes, you're married. Poor man, have you calmed your temper?"

"Fuck off." She spat.

"Ah, you haven't."

Tonks had realised that there was a chance she'd run into Tristan, there was no way she could completely avoid him even though she had been lucky enough to avoid him for nearly a month now, but she had hoped to never be alone in the department with him.

"Where is everyone?"

"Savage has his trainees in the training room, Dawlish had to lead a raid. Williamson, Smith and Fitzpatrick are at trials and some of my Aurors are patrolling."

"And you weren't invited anywhere?" She asked, her tone tense.

"Someone needs to watch the department in case of an emergency." Tristan said, leaning against her desk, looking her up and down. "You look good."

"And you look like an ass. Leave my desk."

"So hostile, is that really necessary?" He asked, crossing his arms. She noticed he was wearing a wedding ring and felt a surge of pity for his wife. "I'm trying to be civil, Nymph. You look so grown up, so professional. A proper Auror-"

"Go fuck yourself, Tristan." She said, grabbing her books and turning to leave. "Stay away from me."

"Is that anyway to speak to your boss?" He asked, stepping in front of her. "Or are you jealous that I'm married and we can't pick up where we left off?"

"I'm married too, moron."

"Yes, I know very well you are... a werewolf." Tristan said, leaning towards her. "Still like it rough, eh? Does he leave marks on you like I did?"

"No, he's more of a gentleman than you'll ever be." She said, stepping around him.

He grabbed her waist, pulling her back towards him. "If you ever want another go, my wife won't have to know, but I bet your dog would smell me on you, wouldn't he?" He whispered against her ear, pressing against her side.

Tonks shoved him, whipping out her wand. "If you ever put your hands on me or say anything like that again, I will curse your bollocks off." She said. "It's Auror Lupin, by the way. Don't ever call me 'Nymph' again."

"Do keep in mind that I'm your boss now, Lupin."

"Unfortunately."

"You know, as Deputy, I have the ability to delegate the Senior Auror title as I see fit. Remove it, if necessary." Tristan said. "And I worry your work ethic has been suffering lately. Why does it seem your trainees are behind the rest?"

"Do you know who my trainees are, MacIver? They're not behind, all of the trainees have fought the same damn war. John and I discussed it and decided it would be better for Harry and Neville if we work through the practical aspects a little slower, considering everything they've had to go through."

"Dark Wizards don't wait, we need Aurors now." Tristan said. "If they can't keep up with the practical aspects,-"

"It's between me and the Head Auror, which you are not." Tonks spat, walking off towards the training rooms. "Why don't you find something useful to do?" She called over her shoulder.

She reached the training room just as Savage, Ron and Seamus were leaving. Ron and Seamus were deep in an argument about the Chudley Cannons and didn't seem to notice her as they passed.

"Where's Spinnet?" Tonks asked Savage.

"Left the program yesterday, as did Wood." Savage said. "Are both of yours holding on?"

Tonks nodded. "They are, but adding six Aurors still won't be enough for our department."

"It'll be years before we're anywhere near what we used to be." Savage said. "How is Remus?"

"Not well enough to be questioned."

"That's not why I was asking." Savage said. "The longer the Capture Unit waits to question him, the better. They're being forced to gather evidence but-"

"They won't find anything on Remus."

"Nothing recent." Savage said. "Remus does have a bit of a history, though, did you know?"

She shrugged. "He's a werewolf, the Ministry spent the entire last war trying to arrest them for every little thing." Tonks said. "This time around,-"

"Do you honestly not know about the riot of '81? That's what I mean. The Capture Unit knows he was there and-"

"I don't remember hearing about any riot, and he was in the Order at the time."

"Tonks, he's on the list of prisoners from Brutum. He was there." Savage said, leaning against the door to the training room.

"Brutum existed?" She asked, frowning. She had briefly come across mention of Brutum during research for a History of Magic at Hogwarts but numerous Minsitry officials had always issued statements to the Daily Prophet that it had never actually existed, claiming that it was nothing more than a rumour. She had mentioned it to Alastor once during training and he had rebuffed her, saying it wasn't to be talked about, or people would get the wrong idea.

It had been formed right at the end of the last war, rumours spreading quickly through the November after Voldemort's death and Harry's survival. She had known attacks by werewolves and other beasts had lessened but because she had been a child, she really only knew about these types of things if she overheard her parents mention it or if she caught a glimpse of one of the Ministry's denials in the Daily Prophet. All she ever found was that it was reportedly a prison that housed giants, werewolves, centaurs and various other non-humans that were deemed a threat by the Ministry.

"We're not supposed to talk about it but it did. Our departments had nothing to do with it, Magical Creatures controlled the entire thing. As soon as people heard about it, we were all forced to issue statements saying the Ministry would never do that." Savage said. "No one really knows what happened, only that there was a large riot on the first full moon after everyone was imprisoned there. Only specific Aurors and Hit Wizards were deployed, and then reportedly had memories of that night erased."

"But if he was there, it would have been against his will."

"I'm not sure the Capture Unit cares."

"But what actually happened? What can they say about him?" Tonks asked.

"No idea. I imagine the only ones who know are the ones who escaped during the riot." Savage said. "Tonks, I'm asking this as a friend so don't be upset, but how well do you actually know Remus? It doesn't sound like you know much about-"

"He doesn't like to talk about his lycanthropy or his time in Greyback's pack, I can't fault him for that."

"Maybe you should insist." Savage said, and then he straightened up, nodding behind her. "Trainees."

Savage gave a nod to Harry and Neville as he left.

"Good morning." Tonks said to the two younger men. Harry was sporting a bruise on his cheek, and Tonks frowned. "What happened, Harry?"

"Nothing, it's fine." Harry said quickly, brushing at his cheek as if he could make the bruise vanish. "How's Remus?" He asked, sounding eager to avoid any more questions.

"I imagine the same, or I'd have gotten an owl." Tonks said. "I didn't go to see him this morning. He asked me not to. The moon is coming up so he's in one of his usual moods."

"When are you going to tell him about Teddy? If he knew-" Harry said.

"That's complicated." Tonks said as they entered the room. "I'm going to see what this full moon does and decide from there. Healer Davis said it's likely temporary anyway. He may wake up one morning and remember everything."

"What if he doesn't?" Harry asked.

"We're going to do some dueling practice today, I think, do more work on your defensive spells." Tonks said, quickly switching the subject. "Specifically for arrests. Neville, you're the Dark Wizard. Resist Harry's attempt to arrest you."

An hour later, she was still watching them duel. Neville was resisting Harry easily, and while she could have intervened, she knew it was good to make them duel for long periods because standoffs could last hours and they had to have the stamina. She didn't doubt them, of course, because they were far more experienced with Dark Wizards than most Auror recruits.

Both were managing to block each other's spells, and she could tell they were focused completely on each other. That was, in theory, a problem. They had to be able to focus on their duel but also be aware of their surroundings.

Wordlessly, she cast Incarcerous towards Harry's legs, ropes appearing around his legs, tripping him.

"What the-" Harry began, as he landed on the floor.

"You have to watch your back, Potter." She said, vanishing the ropes with a wave of her wand. "Don't worry, I'll pick on Neville next time."

Harry rolled his eyes, pushing himself to his feet. "So, Tonks, you said before that most Aurors revert back to Stunning. If that's true, why do we use Flipendo? Why learn half of these?"

She shrugged. "Half of these will just be spells from Hogwarts textbooks, I guess it's just the Ministry's idea that it's good to know them. Find a spell that works for you, and use it. Me? I love using Incarcerous when I'm actually arresting someone. Stunning works too, because they're usually rendered unconscious by that. I personally wouldn't Disarm someone unless they were about to cast an Unforgivable. I feel it wastes time when you might already have an opening to restrain them some other way."

"And if we have to learn all these spells, why do we also have to learn how to fight like a Muggle?" Neville asked. "Without magic?"

"If you get Disarmed, or are being physically held by someone, you are your only defense at that point. And I'm not just saying only do the fighting you're taught here to do- I bit a guy once and Alastor didn't teach me that. Rely on your instincts on how to get out of the situation." Tonks said. "Sometimes you end up having to do terrible things, but you have to do what you have to do."

"Were you always caught in these types of situations?" Neville asked. "Is being an Auror really that violent? Violent enough to bite a bloke?"

"I became a qualified Auror in the first few months of the war, I have no idea what it's like when there's no war." She said. "I can only hope it's a little easier- a little less deadly... but with the amount of Death Eaters still loose, I don't know."

"Your Dad said you've been in plenty of tight spots, how bad did it actually get for the Aurors?" Harry asked.

"There were times that I should have died, that others should have died... it wasn't pleasant, but you get used to it." She said slowly. "But you two, you've seen more than I ever did- I don't doubt you'll do great when you do actual missions."

"When will that be, though?" Neville asked. "Doesn't seem like Dawlish is too eager."

"I don't know that, either. I'm trying to convince Dawlish to let us get to the more practical aspects but it's hard... He did mention that the French Ministry is willing to help us train, and he is considering sending you two for six months."

"With you?" Harry asked. "Or will we have different mentors there?"

"I'm not sure yet." Tonks said. "I wouldn't be able to go for six months, not with Teddy and Remus here. You'll have to learn French, but if there's another language you'd prefer, maybe we can set something up with those Ministries instead."

"But we're training here, with you."

"Sometimes Aurors don't get to stay with their mentors the entire time, and it might be safer to send you two to a country where there isn't still a price on your heads. It's not decided yet, don't worry about it." Tonks said. "Now, switch your roles. Harry, try to resist Neville."

Her mind drifted back to Brutum while she watched them duel and then she remembered Kingsley- he had said he met Remus for some business after the first war. Did he know about Brutum? Kingsley was extremely adept at blocking memory charms and could easily lie about having his memory modified. She sent a quick patronus to Kingsley while the boys weren't looking.

Ten minutes later, just as Neville managed to restrain Harry, the silver lynx appeared beside her.

"One O'Clock, my office, tomorrow."

It vanished as fast as it appeared but she felt better. She could talk to Kingsley and perhaps he'd give her answers.

"That was Kingsley's, yeah?" Harry asked. "Is it Order business?"

"Sort of." Tonks said. "He's going to help me with Remus."

"How do those messages work, anyway?" Harry asked. "I never could figure it out."

"None of Dumbledore's Army could manage it either, we just used the coins." Neville said.

"I suppose they'd be easier to communicate with than the summoned memos Aurors generally use. I find them faster, too." Tonks said. "I wonder if Dawlish would have an issue with all of the Aurors doing that- or the coin. I know he did mention that the communication options needed to be fixed. If I show you how the charm works, will you show me the coin? Maybe we could show Dawlish both options. Do you both know how to conjure a strong patronus? You'll need to have a good hold on the charm for this to work. Start casting, see how long you can control your charm for."

"Tonks?" Remus asked when he heard the door open.

"No, it's Harry."

"Where's Tonks?" Remus asked, slightly disappointed. "Is she here?"

"No, she's not." Harry said.

Remus felt bad that he felt disappointed at Harry's presence, and despite asking Tonks not to come for a few days, he had hoped she would come to see him the morning after his first full moon here.

"What time is it?" Remus asked.

"Nearly five in the evening." Harry said. "Healer Davis says you've been asleep all day, but the full moon was not as bad as they feared. He did write to Dora and told her you were okay, so she shouldn't be worrying."

"That's good, I imagine it wasn't doing her any good, worrying over me when she must have so much work." Remus said. "How are things at the office?"

"Difficult." Harry said. "There's only so much in-Ministry training we can do but Dawlish still doesn't believe it's safe to send us out for patrols."

"Is Tonks still only training or has she been given active work too?"

"Well, since Te-" Harry cleared his throat. "Uh, since the Ministry is so low on Aurors, Dawlish wants her just training us because the other trainees keep getting interrupted. I don't think the new deputy would give her cases anyway, he's a bit of an ass about her. He says some ridiculous stuff about her capabilities, and I didn't even think they'd ever met because I've never seen them around each other, but it sounds like he knew her before he transferred out."

"I don't think you should be calling your superior names."

"If you heard half of what he said, you'd think the same."

"That may be true, but in all jobs, there is unfortunately a level of professional respect expected-"

"I know that, Remus, I don't insult the man to his face!"

Remus let out a laugh before he could stop it. "I think Tonks is a bit of an influence on you. She said something rather similar once, right before..." Remus paused, frowning. "I know I've heard her say something to that effect before, but I can't remember when."

"Maybe she could remind you." Harry said.

"I don't imagine it's important enough to warrant a visit from her."

"I don't think she'd need a very important reason to visit you."

"I don't want her to get the wrong idea. It's better for her to be away from me, she doesn't need to be involved with a werewolf."

"Aren't you tired of thinking that way, Remus? The war is over, things are getting safer. It's not such a terrible idea-"

"I didn't say it was terrible, I said it was dangerous." Remus said firmly. "She's better off without me, without the shame. She's an Auror, it would hurt her reputation to continue this involvement with me-"

"Well, you married her-" Harry's sentence ended abruptly. "I- Remus, I mean-"

"What did you say?" Remus asked quietly.

Harry sighed and Remus could almost imagine him pinching the bridge of his nose, his glasses pushed upwards. He had seen Harry do it once before in class and it had been struck Remus as so James-like that he had struggled to continue his sentence.

"No one was supposed to tell you until she felt you were ready to know." Harry finally said. "You're married."

Remus didn't know how to respond. A mix of emotions rushed over him. It explained a lot, how he felt that pull for her every time she came by, how he missed her so much, how every fiber of his being screamed at him when he pushed her away... they were bonded through marriage.

Above all of the emotions, the worry and dread and the shock, another emotion seemed to be taking over and he realised that the idea was not so terrible after all.

Will you relish being a poor man's wife
Unable to provide for your life?
I relish being your wife