As I'm looking to the sky to count the stars
I wonder if you see them where you are

Harry watched as a tall figure rose from the ground but tonight, they did not remain a shadow. Smoke swirled around the figure as features began to materialize- long black hair carried by a breeze Harry couldn't feel, long robes that were pitch black and flowing. Her eyes caught Harry's attention the most, empty and plain white.

Her voice was soft and melodic, somehow comforting. "I am owed four and I will take them. One by one, four will repay."

"Repay what?" Harry asked.

"The debt." She said. "For the souls that were taken back."

"That wasn't anyone else's fault." Harry argued. "No one- none of us- made that happen."

"You are correct." Death said. "Except you are also wrong. My gifts have not been that close together in many decades. They came so close, and for the first time, belonged to one person- you."

"I have never had all three in my possession-"

"Not in your possession, no, but in your control, yes." Death said. "And when you died that night, facing Tom Riddle, you caused a ripple. I do not like ripples. The four that you brought back with you, have you ever wondered their significance?"

He always had, but hadn't wanted to obsess, so he assumed it was mere chance. Death seemed to hear this answer, even if Harry hadn't said it.

"It was not chance." Death said. "When you went back, as it was always decided you would, you pulled them with you. Those four in particular, you called them back out of your love for them. Even if you did not know. You felt the loss on behalf of little Teddy, so you recalled his parents. You felt the loss of a brother, so you recalled Fred Weasley. You felt the pain of an innocent, yet brave, life being ended and that recalled Colin Creevey. It was not your fault, but you made it happen."

"And now, the repayment?"

"Tom Riddle was claimed in your place, as it was always meant to be. You or him, one of you would be mine." Death said. "The others were also meant to become mine. There is a balance, Harry, as much as you dislike it. When one is meant to die, they must die. There is no escaping me, not forever."

"Will it be them, again?"

"I do not know. I do not choose who dies and when. I simply collect." Death said. "Four will die. One by one, four souls will repay the debt."

Harry woke with a start, fumbling for his glasses. For a brief moment, he could remember the dream in detail, but details began to fade rapidly.

He could remember the figure of Death, but not what had been said, except for one thing- four will die.

Usually, he remembered more, but not today. It still made him feel uneasy.

It was still dark and Neville was still asleep in the other bed. Harry was glad he had woken up in his bed today, unlike the day before when he woke up on the floor in the hallway to Tonks saying he had been sleep walking.

It was now the third time she had found him on a floor and he really wished it didn't keep happening.

The rest of the flat was quiet when he left the room and the clock in the kitchen told him it was nearly three in the morning.

He would have to be up soon anyway, so he started to make breakfast. He liked cooking when it was by his own choice. He considered himself good at it too, but often burned the Dursleys' food out of sheer pettiness. It was the only thing he could really do to 'get back at them', though it was hardly revenge for how they treated him.

He sometimes wondered about them, he couldn't help it. He wondered if they had moved home, if they had gotten rid of any evidence of Harry. Maybe they told neighbours he finally truly lost his mind and was locked away somewhere.

He could imagine it clearly- Aunt Petunia would be horrified and embarrassed as Uncle Vernon loudly proclaimed that his nephew was a certified madman locked in a hospital somewhere.

Sometimes he found it funny, how terrified they seemed of magic.

As he got older, he did understand. It was easy to fear what someone didn't understand, he saw it in the wizarding world too.

As he went to sit at the table, he noticed Tonks was sitting on the balcony. He grabbed a second plate and went out to join her. It was raining and cold, but he could also feel the presence of a light heating charm that was keeping the area barely chilled.

She looked up as the door opened and gave him a small smile. "You're up early."

"So are you."

"I didn't sleep. Neither of us feel well tonight. Bill said it gets better after a few months." She said, gesturing to Teddy, who was fast asleep against her chest. "Teddy definitely doesn't sleep well on nights like these, I think it being genetic must be different than how me and Bill are affected. It's cooler out here even with a warming charm, seems to have soothed him finally."

Harry knew Teddy didn't sleep well on full moons but had always figured a few smaller side effects was better than a full infection. He set the second plate down on the small table. "Made breakfast if you're hungry." He said, sitting in the other chair.

"Thanks, but you know you don't have to cook for us all the time. Neville and I know how to cook as well. Neville's been good at it since he was young too, he cooks for his Gran a lot." She said, but she shifted Teddy and picked up the plate. Teddy made a dissatisfied noise but didn't stir.

He shrugged. "I like cooking." He didn't know Neville also cooked a lot as a child. It made sense, he supposed. From what he understood, Augusta had kept very busy when Neville was younger so Neville would have had to learn to take care of himself at a younger age. He hadn't known until Auror training that Tonks had been his babysitter for a couple of summers when she was a teenager, however. She had made a joke that her Mum had offered her up to 'train her' into being more maternal and feminine. He personally didn't understand the obsession parents had with wanting their kids to be more masculine or feminine.

"Perhaps that's why you're so good at potions." Tonks said. "I've always heard there was a correlation, but Remus is terrible at potions and good at cooking, so maybe not."

"I was only good at potions when I had Severus' book."

"You were good when you realised the textbooks were wrong. He was good for not teaching from the book, otherwise it would have been a lot harder for students to get the NEWTs they needed. He always told me to consider how old a potion recipe is before continuing, it could change the outcome."

"Was he a good teacher to you?"

"During fifth year, I begged him to tutor me outside of class but he said I didn't need it, just more practice, because I relied on the book too much. Instinct plays a very important part of brewing potions, he said, just like instinct is important for Aurors too." She said. "But other than that, he was distant to all of us. Never cruel, but he made a few weird comments about my family, I think he confused my Mum with Bellatrix twice during my first year but... yeah, aside from a few remarks, he was okay. Always favoured Slytherin, of course. I did hear how awful he was to your year, though."

Harry found it weird that a man as brilliant as Snape would have confused her mother and Aunt. Harry had, during his first meeting with Andromeda, so perhaps it was a common mistake.

"Anyway, that's what he told me a few times. That it's important, knowing that things are not always as they seem. The truth is not always the obvious answer. Keep that in mind and solving cases will be easier." She said.

Harry made a hmm noise.

"Maybe it's an option if being an Auror doesn't work out. Cooking, I mean. You are good at it." She said, picking at the toast. "You might need a backup for when you inevitably retire, whether it's an injury or age. It's actually pretty common for Aurors to retire earlier rather than later. I think Alastor was one of the longest, and he made it nearly fifty years."

Harry realised he never knew how old Mad-Eye was. He wouldn't have known he was around seventy- the way wizards aged still confused him a bit.

"What's your backup?" Harry asked.

"I would have followed Charlie to Romania, worked with dragons."

"You'd trade one dangerous job for another?" Harry asked, clearly envisioning Charlie's scarred arms. He was starting to realise a lot of jobs in the Wizarding World seemed to cause a lot of injuries.

"Would have, not now. I would just focus on raising Teddy now. Maybe I'd go into Healing like Mum. Something quieter." She said. "But you know as well as I that life is dangerous, no matter your job. Depends on how many enemies you have."

"I find it's easy to make new enemies."

"Mm, yeah, definitely one of your more impressive skills, isn't it?"

Harry laughed. He was quiet for a moment after. "Speaking of skills, do you think you'll ever be able to... you know, change again?"

She shrugged. "I've never lost the ability this long before or so completely, so I don't know." She said. "It's been strange. I was so used to the person I made myself, I'm not used to the one I was born as."

"Did you change a lot, daily?" Harry asked. He was able to see a few differences from when he had first met her to now, but hadn't spent enough time around her before to know what had been changed and what hadn't been.

"Eye and hair colour the most, but my nose too. I wanted to look more like Dad." Tonks said. "Always thought I looked too much like Mum's side."

"You look like your Mum, not the others." Harry said.

"A stay in Azkaban will do that to someone." She said. "Bellatrix didn't look like she does until after Azkaban. Same with Sirius."

"Did you know Sirius before?"

"A little when I was young." Tonks said. "He used to babysit me a lot when Roofie's Mum couldn't. Never met Remus before I joined the Order, but Sirius and James had mentioned him a few times, he just never came with them when they babysat me."

"What about Wormtail? Or my Mum?"

"I met Peter twice, I think. Your Mum, only once. It was shortly after she married your Dad, but then they went into hiding."

They were interrupted by an owl swooping down, dropping a small bundle of letters onto their empty plates.

Harry picked up the bundle. All of the letters had a Ministry seal, which meant the Ministry had intercepted anything meant for them. He had mixed feelings about that.

There were two letters for each of them and Harry sorted them before opening his own.

One was from Ginny and Hermione. The other was from Dawlish.

Hermione and Ginny's letter was filled with details of their schooling, how much they disliked the current Defense Professor, how they hoped Harry would be back in London for Christmas. Harry briefly wondered who was teaching half of the classes at Hogwarts, considering the deaths of at last three teachers, but he hadn't asked Hermione or Ginny how the school had managed the issue. They were careful not to ask Harry anything about where he was, he noticed.

He would reply later, maybe with a joke saying one of them should take over the role of Defense teacher.

Dawlish's letter was basic, saying he'd be coming to assess them in two weeks and he'd have an assignment sent for them to have completed for part of his assessment. Harry wondered how many assessments and exams they'd be subjected to. Tonks had said she had only had two assessments and three exams, but since they had shortened training for the new recruits, she didn't know how they'd do it, but had mused there might be more testing to ensure they're keeping up with the condensed training.

It sounded like her training was very different from theirs, as she said they had often gathered all recruits together for bigger group exercises, but so far, they hadn't been gathered.

"Mm, not in the mood for letters yet." Tonks said, looking at hers. "Mum's probably written again because I didn't reply to her letter from the other day. Dawlish is probably just checking up on us."

"In my letter, Dawlish said he's coming in two weeks, what kind of assessment do you think he'll do?"

"I'm not sure. I think it's too early for most of them, but maybe dueling in the dark? They'd have to recruit someone for the lecture portion, but I'm sure Larry or a senior Auror here would do it." Tonks said. "They may just move all of the other big exercises to your end exams and do smaller tests throughout, I'm not sure. Either way, you'll pass the assessments, I'm confident."

At least someone is, Harry thought to himself.

"I don't feel very confident about it some days."

"You've only just started, you'll get there." Tonks said. "Do you like Larry's methods?"

"He's a bit intense sometimes but that's the idea, isn't it?"

She nodded. "I think he wants to see if either you end up cracking up. You two have been through a lot more than any other recruits in history."

"What if we do?" Harry asked.

"Crack up?" She asked and he nodded. "I dunno, I suppose you'll just be like most of the other Aurors. I've heard all Aurors do to some extent."

"Have you?"

Tonks laughed. "No one's told me as much, so I don't know, but maybe. I assume they will if it happens. I'll tell you if you start to go nutters and you tell me if I do, deal?"

"What if it happens at the same time, who tells us then?"

"I suppose no one, we'll just pretend to be sane."

Harry laughed, grabbing their empty dishes and going inside. He was glad, at least, that if he had to be stuck in hiding in a different country, he was with people he considered friends. He wasn't sure how he'd be able to do Auror training if it was just him and Larry. Neville and Tonks made it seem easy, but he could tell they missed their families just as much as he missed Ginny, Hermione and the rest of the Weasleys. He wondered if, when Dawlish arrived in two weeks, they could convince him to let them go home for Christmas.

Too proud to breathe
But all too scared to say
The things worth saying
Who knew this trip would be this hard