Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Trial and Error
Trial and Error is a method one can use to verify if a choice they made was right or wrong. In math, this is a rudimentary way to find the numerical values of variables by plugging the numerical value into an equation and seeing if it gives us the solution we want. This is also a fancy way of saying, "we're going to guess and hope for the best".
The mission halls always made my nose itch due to the heavy scent of ink and paper. And not in a comfortable way like how a library smells. More like how a freshly printed newspaper smelled. It was just too… busy.
When team seven checked in, missing cat in tow, the hall was mostly empty. There were no teams ahead of us or behind us as Naruto happily handed over the cat to the awaiting noblewoman. "He he he. Stupid cat", he snickered as he watched the feline being smothered by his owner who clearly didn't know how to hold him.
Kakashi stood behind us as we stood in front of the Hokage and the mission clerks. And for some reason, Iruka-Sensei was there as well; filling in for someone. But… why? Wasn't teaching a bunch of brats already a full-time job?
My focus was on the tall glass windows; looking out. "Now, then. Let's see what we have available", said Lord Hokage as he referred to a sheet of paper he held in his hand. It was a nice day, as most days tended to be in Konoha. Clear skies. Light breeze. Not too hot. Not too cold. "Babysitting, shopping, digging up potatoes", The Hokage started to list.
Naruto didn't allow him to continue. "No!" he complained. Personally, I think we lost him as soon as the Hokage mentioned babysitting. "I want a real mission. An exciting mission!" Naruto declared as his team and sensei looked on with wary yet unsurprised expressions. Ooh, look. A bird just flew by. Long wings. I wonder what species of bird it was. "Come on old man, give us something good!"
The Hokage didn't react. He didn't need to. Not when he had Iruka-Sensei there to take care of that for him. Slamming his hands on the tabletop, Iruka-Sensei stood up; an angry reprimanding snarl on his scarred face. "You idiot!" Iruka-Sensei yelled. "You're just a Rookie. Still mastering the basics. These missions are the ones that will help you achieve that!"
Fascinating. So, Iruka-Sensei will yell at Naruto outside of the academy. This consistency across settings is excellent data. I hypothesize that if we were to stay in Iruka-Sensei's presence for the length of a school day in any setting, he'd yell at Naruto at least four more times. Though that would be hard to test since we didn't cross paths with our old academy instructor too often. Although, if I manage to wrangle my old notebook away from where ever Ibiki is keeping it, I might update the section I have on Naruto.
Still feeling the aftermath of Kakashi's 'game' from earlier, I yawned loudly and widely as Naruto spat right back at Iruka-Sensei, "Babysitting isn't a mission! It's just stupid- Aaah!" Naruto's sentence turned into a yowl as Kakashi-Sensei's fist met the top of his head. The floor under my feet shook as Naruto's face slammed into the hardwood with a resounding thump.
"Knock it off", Kakashi ordered as he glowered down at his loudest student with Sakura and Sasuke looking on.
Thankful to Naruto for directing all attention to himself, I started taking small steps away from team seven. Never taking my eyes away from the windows in the process. Better to not be associated with them for what is to come next.
"Naruto", Lord Hokage spoke calmly; cutting off this display before it could escalate. "Let me explain how a shinobi village thrives". Naruto only caught the tail end of what he said; too busy rubbing his abused noggin as he picked himself up to sit cross-legged on the floor. I took another step. "The village receives requests of all sorts. Ranging from babysitting to assassinations. Once we receive the requests, they are…"
As the Hokage explained the hierarchical organization system Konoha uses to reduce the odds of its manpower from dying, Naruto turned his back to the table and somehow ended up on the topic of ramen. Not sure how. Or why the others went along with it. I wasn't paying attention when it happened; too busy inching away undetected.
Unfortunately, my escape wasn't as subtle as I wished it to be. As Naruto went on about the importance of selecting the right kind of broth, Kakashi's arm shoot out as he grabbed a fistful of my shirt by the shoulder part; preventing me from putting any more distance between me and his team. "Yesterday I had pork broth yesterday, and I'm thinking I'll go back to miso today-" As both the Hokage and Naruto talked, Kakashi tilted his head in my direction and gave me one of his crinkling-eye expressions as a way of communicating. In return, I gave him my best disingenuous smile. Oh, how I loathed this battle of wills we've been playing since this morning. At least it was just for today. Better yet, he'll be out of the village for quite some time after we get through this. I just had to endure until then. "And I think once I compare the pork to the miso I can-"
"Silence!" Lord Hokage barked once it clicked that no one was listening to his offered wisdom.
Unapologetically, Kakashi did his best to come off as genuine. "Sorry", he tried as he let go of my shirt and nudged Naruto with his foot.
But Naruto didn't perceive the nudge to be a correction. If anything, he took it as encouragement. Doing what he needed to face the Hokage once again; still in a cross-legged position, Naruto fervently exclaimed. "Stop lecturing me! I'm a bonafide ninja now and I need a real ninja mission".
Sakura held her face in one of her hands as she dealt with the embarrassment caused by association as Sasuke stood stationary and expressionless by her side. Kakashi sheepishly rubbed the back of his head as he studied Naruto's pouting form. And I was back to trying to get away from the impending nonsense. Or at least, I was until Kakashi pinned me with another look.
The Hokage began to chuckle as he placed his pipe between his teeth and folded his hands under his chin. "Fine", he caved. "Since you're so determined, I'll assign team seven a C-ranked mission".
Sasuke and Sakura were startled in their stillness. As if they couldn't believe at Naruto throwing a tantrum worked. Naruto couldn't either, "Really?" He asked as he perked up.
"It'll be an escort mission. You'll help our client return safely home", the Hokage continued; a wisp of a smile on his face.
Leaping to his feet, Naruto could barely contain himself. "Who is it?" he demanded to know; his bodying leaning towards the Hokage. "Someone famous? A Lord?"
"I'll introduce you to him", the Hokage promised. "But first, Rion Aburame, would you like to extend your time with team seven?" The old man's eyes swung in my direction. As did everyone else's at the sound of my name. "This mission would take several days, but it is an experience you cannot get in your current placement".
Crap, I thought as I did my best to not let my thoughts darken my demeanor. "Oh, so sorry. But I'm scheduled to torture someone in the morning. Can't skip that". Slowly, I started moving away from team seven; this time in the direction of the mission table rather than the door. "I'll take that potato mission though. I love D-rank missions. Can't get enough of them".
Iruka-Sensei was frowning at me; unimpressed feelings clearly etched on his brow. Which I felt was hypocritical of him. He yelled at Naruto for not being appreciative of a D-Rank workload. But when I talk about grunt work in a favorable manner, he acts all disappointed. There is no pleasing this man.
I barely took two steps before Kakashi stopped me by swinging an arm over my shoulders and looming over me. "That's a great idea". His voice was light and airy. Not at all matching the oppressive force I sensed as he leaned some of his weight on me. "I'm sure Ibiki would be open to re-arranging his plans. It is for the sake of Rion's training after all". I tried to wiggle out from under Kakashi's arm. But the man had such a presence, I couldn't. Not unless I was willing to break my façade. "Besides, it would be good to have a pair of extra hands for my team's first C-Rank. And I have more to teach Rion". The last part was said darkly. So dark, that a shiver shot up my spine, and my gut filled with dread.
Although, no one else seemed to hear the change in tone. Least of all Naruto. "Yeah", he agreed; beaming at everyone now that things were going his way. "Rion should come with us. Think of all the stories we can tell Anzu when we get back" he said, trying to get me on board.
Grinding my teeth, I tried to come up with a plausible reason why a fourth genin wasn't smart. "I wouldn't want to get in the way", I finally settled on as I looked at the Hokage and Iruka-Sensei. Judging by their impassive faces, I wasn't succeeding. "I mean, Naruto and the others have had weeks to learn how to work together. You know, teamwork. I'd just slow them down". My eyes flashed in Sakura's and Sasuke's direction in the hope one of them would speak up. Surely, they agreed with me. After all, if memory serves, Sasuke was disappointed with having to be on a team at all. While Sakura and I didn't have anything between us. Good or bad. But I'd be another girl around her precious Sasuke. We couldn't have that… right?
But they stood still; mouths closed. Evidently, they weren't impulsive or foolhardy enough to speak their minds around Lord Hokage.
"What are you talking about?" Naruto asked. "You worked with Sasuke and me all the time at the academy. You know, once Iruka-Sensei made that dumb seating chart. And Sakura's cool and smart. I know you two will get along". Oh, Naruto… that was way too much misguided faith.
"You see", Kakashi said good-naturedly as he continued to hang over my shoulder. "The more the merrier".
"Maybe I should talk to Ibiki-Sensei first", I made one last attempt to save my ass as my left eye started to twitch.
Blowing a puff of smoke from his pipe, the Hokage talked over me as if I hadn't said anything at all. "Rion will join team seven for their mission", he decided. "Now, let me introduce you to your client. Send him in".
Satisfied with his victory, Kakashi finally left me alone. Leaving me free to cover my face with my hands as the sounds of a door sliding open filled the room. Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. If I had known today was the day team seven would be meeting the bridge builder, I might have chosen not to antagonize Kakashi. Maybe then I could've slinked back to the bowels of T&I unscathed.
"What the hell?" A new voice made itself known. His tone was rough and his words were slurred. "It's just a bunch of brats. Still wet behind the ears. Do you really expect me to believe they're ninjas? Especially the pipsqueak smiling like a doofus".
I raise my head just in time to see a tanned older man with a towel draped over his shoulder raise his hand to point to the doofus he was referring to. What to do? What to do? I asked myself as Naruto started looking between himself and his teammates; trying to determine who the old man was talking about. This mission wasn't a true C-rank. I remembered that much. A logical conclusion was to reveal as soon as possible that the bridge builder was misleading us. Could I accomplish that before we left the village?
"Hey!" Naruto yelled; completely offended once he figured out who the doofus was amongst us. "Why I oughta-" Naruto threatened as he charged forward.
Though Kakashi caught him before he could get too far. "We'll leave tomorrow", Kakashi announced. "At first light. That will give us time to collect our supplies and prepare". Time… I could work with time.
I formed multiple plans about how to get out of this debacle. Plan A had me sprinting to T&I as fast as I could as soon as I could; only slowing down when security required me to do so. "Where's Ibiki?" I asked as I slammed open the door leading to the department's main office space. "I need a favor".
"No slamming doors!" Shinobu immediately responded without looking up from his paperwork.
From the desk across from his, Anko seemed to welcome the distraction. Her head perked up and she dropped her pen as if she hadn't been using it at all. "Hey, kid. You're back early. How was team seven? Any more stories to share?" Her signature grin was on her face as she waited for me to answer. No doubt expecting some tale about how I made things challenging for my team of the day.
But I was too goal-oriented to be sidetracked. "Where's Ibiki?" I repeated.
Intrigued, gabbed her thumb in the direction of the door on the other side of the room. "In his office", she said. I was already scooting my way around her; heading toward the aforementioned door when she thought to add, "He has a guest right now".
Something in her voice had me pausing. "Who?" I asked, looking back at her from over my shoulder.
Ibiki's office door opening answered my question without Anko having to say anything else. "I'm surprised to see you here, Rion", a falsely cheery voice said. "I thought you'd be preparing for our mission".
With my left eye twitching, I forced a smile before robotically facing forward. Standing shoulder to shoulder with Ibiki was Kakashi. They made an interesting pair. Ibiki with his broad shoulders. Kakashi with his hunched shoulders. Ibiki with his cloth-covered head. Kakashi with his full head of hair. Ibiki with his non-nonsense militant posture. And Kakashi with his relaxed form. "Not as surprised as I am. What do you need that involves T&I".
"Oh, nothing", said Kakashi as he pulled out his book from… somewhere. Opening it to a seemingly random page, he said, "I just wanted to make sure Ibiki was okay with me taking his student for a couple of weeks".
"Oh?" I asked. As if curious to hear Ibiki's response. Though when my eyes flashed over Ibiki, my supervisor/mentor maintained an unimpressed and unmoved demeanor.
"Yes", Kakashi said. His voice was absolutely pleasant and shouldn't give anyone one reason to suspect that there was subtext at play here. But I know better. Lazily, Kakashi turned a page before continuing. "I was worried when you said you had an assignment scheduled in the morning. But you're in luck. You misunderstood. There's no one waiting to be tortured".
In the background, Anko snickered as Shinobu absentmindedly stated, "No one's scheduled one of the interrogation rooms for tomorrow at all". As if he wasn't following this whole conversation.
"That's great", I said. It was becoming more difficult to keep up the act. Even I could hear the strain in my voice. "I was worried about that too".
Snorting as she tried to reign in her enjoyment, Anko managed to calm herself long enough to share, "Rion said there was a favor she needed to ask you, Ibiki. Probably something important. Since it looks like she ran all the way here".
Traitor, I inwardly seethed as I locked eyes with Ibiki. "A favor?" The man prompted; not sounding the least bit interested or curious.
"It's nothing, Ibiki-Sensei", I said; taking a small amount of satisfaction when Ibiki winced at the title. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay with me leaving for this mission. Since I know you don't like it when I don't pull my own weight. But I guess Kakashi-Sensei beat me to it". If I said the last bit a little angrily, no one commented.
Plan B didn't require running. Instead, I dragged my feet as I walked the familiar path to the Aburame compound. I moved even slower once I was there as I head to Shibi and Shino's house. No longer did I think it was a nice day as I walked. Sure. The skies were still clear and it wasn't hot or cold. But I wasn't in the mood to appreciate them.
Shibi was sitting crossed-legged on his porch when I approached. His back was straight and his hands were relaxed in his lap as he sat in a meditative form. Stopping in front of him with me standing on the grass, I waited. With his sunglasses, it was impossible to tell if Shibi's eyes were closed. But as a jounin, he should have been able to sense me before I ever got this close.
"Daughter", Shibi greeted after a moment. "You are supposed to say, 'I'm back'. Why?" Shibi said in his normal flat tone. He didn't sound at all surprised to see me. But that didn't make me suspect anything. For all I knew, Shibi didn't have the emotional range to express being surprised. "Because then I can reply, 'welcome home'".
Shibi waited. I waited. The both of us stared at each other in the hopes that the other would do something. Just like old times.
"Is Shino home?" I asked when I reached the end of my patience.
"No", Shibi answered as he unfolded his legs so they were hanging over the edge of the porch. "Why? Because it is the middle of the day and he is working with his team".
The heavy implication that I should be doing something similar hung in the air. I ignored it. "I need a favor". Shibi didn't offer me any signal that I had his ear. But his stillness was enough for me to elaborate. "I got assigned my first C-ranked mission. It's to the Land of Waves. Meaning it'll be a long time before I'll come back".
Slowly, Shibi nodded; his nose ducking behind his large upturned collar due to the action. "That is an important milestone".
Frowning, I scuffed the grass with the toe of my right sandal. "I don't want to go. I want you to get me out of it".
There was a pause. One long enough to fit in a sigh. Except neither of us did so. "I cannot", Shibi replied after the moment passed.
"What if I promised to call you dad for a month?" I tried. "Two months?"
"I cannot because I have no authority in assigning missions". Shibi explained. Though he did lean forward a little at my offer. At least, he hadn't been disinterested.
Groaning in defeat, I turned so I could lie down on the porch next to Shibi with my feet still on the ground. The wood of the porch felt warm. And it was a nice sensation to feel against my back. Completely worth it if any of the mud on my clothes dirtied them. "I should have gone to that fancy civilian school when I had the chance".
Shibi accepted my presence by not moving. "You would have been bored. Why? Because you would not have been challenged like you were in the academy".
I had my eyes fixed skyward. Not looking at Shibi made this easier to admit. "I'm probably going to die. I'm not prepared for this".
Of course, what I meant by that was not what Shibi interpreted. "It is normal to be nervous during your first out-of-village mission. Why? Because it is new and something you have not done before. However, you will be fine, daughter. The Hokage would not have assigned you to the roster if you were ill-fitted for the task".
Inhaling deeply, I held my breath with my lungs fully expanded. If only that were true. On the exhale I sat up so I could lean over long enough to pull off my sandals. It was time to move on to plan C. But first… "I'm going to leave a note for Shino", I shared as I left Shibi on the porch to do just that.
Hurrying into the house, I made a beeline for Shino's room. Nothing looked changed from when I moved out. Of course, that hadn't been that long ago. In Shino's room, I found a pen and notebook sitting on his desk. Tearing out a blank page, I wrote;
Shino,
I picked up an escort mission. I'll be gone for a while. Please make sure nothing happens to Anzu. Just introduce yourself before you try to help her with anything.
~ Rion
When I returned to the porch to collect my shoes, Shibi was standing on the grass; his shoes were already on. "Are you ready?" He asked.
"Ready for what?" I wrinkled my nose as I tried to think this through. Why did it look like Shibi was waiting for me?
"You require mission gear suitable for travel. I will purchase them for you".
… Okay… I guess this means I won't have to follow through with plan C.
Armed with a new water-proof travel pack that was stuffed with ninja tools, ration bars, a sleeping bag, and a paranoid amount of first aid supplies, the sun was setting by the time I made it home. "I'm back", I called out. Even though I could visibly see Naruto and Anzu occupying our table.
"Where have you been?" Anzu asked as she turned away from whatever conversation she and Naruto were having. "Naruto's been telling me all about it, your first big mission. This is so exciting!"
Sighing to force myself to not immediately disagree, I shrugged off Shibi's gifted gear and left it leaning against the wall so I could peel off my sandals. "I had things to take care of first".
But I might as well not said anything. Both Naruto and Anzu were too far gone. "It's going to be great", Naruto declared; matching my sister's enthusiasm as he reclaimed her attention. "I've never left the village before. And we have to go all the way to the Land of Waves. That's a whole other country!"
"Rion's never left the village either", Anzu related vicariously through me. "Oh, you guys are going to see so many new things and meet new people. Remember everything so you can tell me all about it when you come home".
"You bet!" Naruto promised; basking in the attention. Better him than me.
As Naruto and Anzu occupied each other, only asking for my input, I went about finishing plan C. With our budget notebook and savings in hand, I organized everything the best I could. We already had this month's rent set aside, so Anzu wouldn't have to worry about that. The usual amount we spend on food; I can split it in half since neither Naruto nor I would be here to eat. Anzu would have more than enough. Utilities were included in our rent. So that was one less thing to worry about. Looking at these sums, Anzu should be fine for a month without any income. Two, if she has to. And… and if I don't make it back, the money she'd get for my death would help support her. There was Shino too. I told him to watch out for Anzu. He'd do it. I know he will… That's why I wrote him that note in the first place. Anzu won't go backward. No matter what happens to me. I have to believe that.
By the time I had our finances in order, Naruto retired to his apartment. Even he prioritized a good night's sleep right before big events. That night, as I laid next to Anzu on our shared futon, I tried to come up with a course of action; calculate probabilities and predict the consequences. But it was hard. I felt like I didn't have all the variables. First, there would be the attack by the two enemy chunin. They presented my best chance at discrediting the bridge builder and canceling the mission before he manages to come clean and successfully pull on the heartstrings of team seven. If I failed there, then there would be Zabuza and Haku to contend with… If my goal was to take as little risk as possible, how do I deal with those two? How do I outsmart a prodigy and the demon of the mist? Or, an even better question, how do I survive this mission with Kakashi watching my every move? All day to day, he was one step ahead of me. And nothing I did seemed to throw him off. Not even Iruka-Sensei or Shibi managed to do that during the time I spent with them. Truly, the most dangerous person was Kakashi.