A Well Paying Quest for this In-debt Adventurer!
It was early in the morning when I was rudely awakened by a screaming Aqua. We'd just returned from our traumatic trip to the Crimson Demon's village and had spent the entirety of last night celebrating subjugating yet another Demon King General.
"You shitty HIKI-NEET, give me back my fans!"
"No! I'm going to go to the nearest pawn shop around and seeing how much I can sell for. With all these fancy design features I'm sure it'll fetch quite a price!"
"No! Your evil scum-zuma evil evil evil! I've had these babies since day one in this world! I can't feel at rest if I don't know where they are!"
"Then maybe you should have thought before spending ALL OF OUR MONEY on some fancy booze, purifying everyone's beers on a drunken stupor and PUSHING ALL THE RESPONSIBILITY TO ME!"
At that moment a sleepy Megumin opened her door, rubbing her eyes vigorously.
Looking annoyed about the commotion that had awoken her.
She opened her mouth presumably to say something but promptly chose to reseal it. Prioritizing quickly making her way to the exit instead.
I snapped my neck around to face her.
"Oi Megumin, where do you think your going?"
"..."
"You're not safe from this either. After being told THAT MANY times to stay away from the alcohol, you still decided to steal a bottle from a wasted Aqua and drink it."
"I'm already 14 mind you! I'm old enough to marry and more than mature enough to drink."
"This world and its stupid rules. Is it because that you were SO MATURE enough to drink alcohol that you chose to blow up the entire southern section of the wall?"
"It couldn't helped! It was the perfect object at the perfect time! How was I supposed to hold myself back."
"You caused possibly permanent ear damage to those who were around it, and landed us a 500 million eris fine!"
"Hell you were stupider than Aqua last night because of you all of the money we earned from slaying 4 generals are ALL GONE. 4 DEMON KING GENERALS! And we're still 50 million eris in debt!"
Aqua and Megumin's eyes went wide as I pulled out a sheet indicating the amount of money we owed.
"Thankfully because we've killed so many generals they aren't going to rush in to our mansion and take all of our belonging again. But if we fail to pay back this debt within a month, in their words "drastic measures will be taken""
"Oi, what kind of bullshit is that? Even the most famous and well paid adventurers don't get 50 million eris in a month. How are we, a former rookie party with no connections supposed to make that debt back."
Megumin complained.
"Maybe by not causing enough trouble to lose 600 million dollars worth of money in a single night!"
That shut her up.
"Darkness left earlier this morning to appeal against you getting jail time Megumin. So I'm while I go to the pawn shop and see how much I can sell these fans for, you two, make yourselves useful and go to the guild. Check if there's quests worth doing."
Neither girls dared to interject my orders.
I walked through the streets of Axel, making my way to the pawn shop.
Apparently a new all you can eat meat restaurant had opened up around this street.
The meat in this world is surprisingly good considering the lack of technology so it was a shame I couldn't afford going.
I sighed.
Every time I dared to hope. Every time I allowed myself to believe life wouldn't be so bad in this new world my companions somehow find a way to prove me wrong.
Even with half a billion Eris worth of money.
"If I ever get enough money to leave this town and live comfortably again I SWEAR I will leave those idiot. Those stupid problematic money sinks... I'm dying to see their faces when I finally cut the line and leave them behind.
By the time I was standing in front of the pawn shop, I realized I had gathered up a ton of stares from onlookers.
Awkwardly trying to shift the attention of the street away from myself I meekly entered the store.
"Here again? If it's anymore of your so called "fancy beer bottles" I'm not buying anymore. Every single one of them turned out to be some cheap booze poured into an expensive bottle! I lost a ton of money because of those."
"S-sorry."
"So what are you here for this time? If it's another set of armor I'll gladly take it but by the way you didn't bring Darkness with you I think it's safe to assume that's not it."
"No, I was wondering if you'd like to buy these fans."
I spread out the fans in front of the storekeeper.
"Their indestructible and channel the spell "nature's beauty" well."
The storekeeper took the fan from me.
"I'll be the judge of that."
With a quick chant repeated under his breath, a mini blue spell circle formed around his eye.
Probably a kind of inspecting spell.
"The fans themselves appear normal but I can sense an intense holy aura surrounding these fans which I'm assuming is what makes them indestructible and channel "nature's beauty" well."
Closing the fan, he dissipated the spell circle.
"I'm willing to do you a favor to give you a maximum of 1 million. But if you ever do defeat the Demon King you better give me a shout out as the "most fair priced pawn shop that helped you on your journey to defeat the demon king"."
"Deal."
We shook hands and he handed me a sack of money.
I made my way out of the shop and counted the eris one by one, double checking to make sure I didn't get ripped off.
It's not like I'll defeat the demon king either way. All of the generals I killed were either because of luck or because of a really good match up.
I'm sorry Mr. pawn shop guy but I'm afraid your investment in me will never be returned.
I walked to the guild, the pawn shop was placed conveniently near the Guild, making it easier for adventurers to pawn of items obtained in quest if too lazy to sell it them selves.
Wondering if opening up my own pawn shop was a good idea, I opened the guild door.
I was immediately charged at by a screaming Aqua and a slightly more reserved Megumin, whose gleaming eyes gave away that she too was just as excited.
"KAZUMAAAA"
Aqua yelled holding up a piece of paper.
The contents included the following the quest itself, the story behind the quest and the reward for completing the quest. Classic RPG style.
"Let's see, the quest is... "Purify the Haunted Castle!" Objective, exorcise the scepters and potential other undead creatures roaming the castle. Story: centuries ago, a formerly flourishing kingdom, Fukushu was at its peak. Citizens were happy, the ruler was a benevolent and just ibex beloved by the people. And all the citizens of the kingdom were united under the belief of a single unnamed goddess. The kingdom was at peace and with security so tight everyone nothing could go wrong. Until one faithful day... yada yada yada I got the gist of it. Geez, cliche much? Another "everything was alright until it wasn't anymore story?... Ok let's see reward, 50 million eris."
"...what?"
I double checked the quest paper.
Then triple checked.
But the numbers on the paper didn't waver.
"Aqua did you use illusion magic?"
"Geez, Kazuma have some more faith in me! I only know holy magic. I wouldn't dare learn deception magic like illusion."
Megumin butted in.
"No need to be so spectacle all the time! This is our free ticket out of debt! Being able to purify specters isn't as easy as you think Kazuma. But we have Aqua, who's you could say one and only use is powerful holy magic!"
Ironic for you to say that.
"Nonono we definitely should be more spectacle, we get put in 50 million eris worth of debt after defeating a Demon King general and suddenly a quest, luring us into some unknown forgotten and abandoned castle with the least creative backstory ever is offering us the exact amount of money we need to get out of debt. We should as least consult with Vanir before accepting this."
"No! Me? A holy goddes adored by the world consulting a filthy creature like him? Never! Besides I already accepted the quest for us no need to consult Vanir about it."
"YOU WHAT?"
"What? I said I accepted the quest for us already."
"YOU DUMB BITCH didn't you consider the possibility of DOOMING US ALL into some trap set by the Demon King? We JUST killed another one of his generals. At this point we might as well have a billion Eris bounty in his army. You think when the perfect opportunity to bait us with money and get rid of us arises the Demon King ISN'T going to do anything?"
"..."
Aqua tried to argue but promptly froze after realizing what she had just done.
"Ughh, you two, go to that table and sit quietly, don't do ANYTHING until I come back. Understood?"
Aqua and Megumin eventually complied with my order and sulked away to the corner table I had told them to sit at.
~~~
The store was completely empty as per usual. When I opened the door, a daydreaming Wiz sprung awake into action.
I could swear I saw a flash of disappointment in her eyes when she saw it was me who entered.
Even so, she smiled and politely greeted me to the store.
"Hi Wiz-san do you know where Vanir is? I have some business with him."
Suddenly, a voice called out from the back of the store.
"I'm here brat, Moi knew that you'd come already."
"Sup! I'm here to consult-"
"Yes yes, I know, I know. Consult about thy little quest because the reward money is suspiciously high. Brat moi isn't a devil that one can come up to just for such trivial requests. Moi clairvoyance is an ancient gift granted to moi for being one of thy 7 Archdukes of Hell. Not some toy for a brat. However since thou's getting quite the pay from this quest I'd expect to get a portion of the pay, no?"
This shitty devil...
Ancient gift my ass.
You use it all the time just to fuck around with people.
Trying convincing your boss that THAT isn't using it like a toy. I'm sure whoever it is will be on my side.
"How much?"
"5 million eris, for just 10% of thy quest's reward thou shalt receive all thy knowledge thou would need to completely this quest with 100% certainly and safety."
5 million eris huh. That means I'll have to still completely another 5 million eris worth of quests in a month.
But at the same time, securing the completion of this quest is important.
If some hidden boss or trap causes us to fail this quest not only will we miss our only opportunity at escaping debt and we'll have to pay an extra fee for failing...
"I accept."
"Good choice."
The devil grinned. He then pulled out a crystal ball from his pocket.
This bastard knew I was going to accept the deal didn't he...
I'd undoubtedly fallen right into his hands, his help is undoubtedly crucial.
As much as it hurt my ego.
"Now brat, who is currently fighting thou inner dark emotions about being completely predicted my moi, worry not. Watch and witness moi absolute power of foresight."
As he said this,his eyes glowed a bright red and the crystal shined. He cackled madly grinning ear to ear.
Go preform at a play of something you show off...
But then he stopped.
His grin faded, replaced by a serious frown.
His cackling also stopped, coated over by choking heavy silence instead.
"D-did something go wrong?"
"Brat, I recommend you don't take this quest."
In contrast to his usual theatrics, his response was short and simple.
Whatever he had seen was terrifying enough to flip over his mood.
"I can't exactly do that without paying another fee."
"Brat you will die."
"Dying isn't much of a problem, I have Aqua around to revive me anyways."
Vanir let out a heavy sigh.
"Look brat, moi can't explain what will happen without the future changing, possibly for the worse so I'll keep it simple. If you are adamant with completing this quest moi shalt tag along with you."
"I refuse, if you come you'll definitely demand another fee and I can't afford sharing more than 5 million eris."
"Moi is not so petty as to change moi initial fee after being the one to offer help. However, if something were to happen that would have lead to the failure of the quest had moi not interrupted, moi will demand 10 million eris in return."
This isn't a bad deal at all. Granted he doesn't sabotage us himself, we have nothing to lose. If we don't need his help we get to keep 45 million eris as originally planned, and if a situation occurs where we need to pay him his 10 million eris, we wouldn't have gotten a single penny from the quest either way.
Besides I doubt he'll sabotage us considering how he reacted seeing his vision.
"Deal."
~~~
"Ne Kazuma, why is that parasite coming with us. NE"
"Can I put on your mask? My senses as a Crimson Demon are telling me to wear that."
"Y-you evil devil, if have any kind of desires you wish to enact upon my valued party members. Huff, huff. You must go through me first!"
"Crimson Demon with a strange obsession for a certain joke spell, moi only sells a replica of moi mask to lucky visitors of moi shop. If thou purchases 5 items in "Wiz's Magical Item Shop" thou chances at obtaining one may increase!"
Part 2:
The wagon stopped after reaching it's destination. The edge of a medieval gravel pathway to a gate,presumably leading to the ancient castle.
Like you'd expect in a classic rpg, the horse refused to move any closer towards the castle, meaning no free ride into it. Not that I particularly minded a short walk to the place.
It was nice to get some fresh air after that ride.
The entire ride was filled with torturous dialogue spanning from Aqua's endless complains to Darkness's hundreds of demon related... desires.
Like an unskipable cutscene filled with dialogue when your only there for the gameplay.
On the other side of the wagon, it appeared Vanir too, shared similar thoughts as mine, having a not so well masked expression of relief on his face.
Darkness's nonstop rambling on what she wanted him to do to her must have really affected him more than he let on.
Hell, I'd be terrified if I had to endure two hours of someone naming and vividly describing their messed up kinks about me.
Darkness is terrifying.
Megumin impatiently jumped out the wagon and the rest followed suit.
They'd all gotten tired by each others endless ramblings.
The irony...
When we reached the gate, Vanir simply kicked it down, claiming it wasn't helping as the quest technically hadn't started yet.
His time was money. And every minute he spent away from the shop was another minute risking the money he'd earned over the past few months.
I guess coming here was essentially a gamble to him. If he doesn't have to interfere here he's certainly lose at least some of his unprotected money back at the store.
Thinking about money made me harden my resolve.
As generous as the archduke's offer to bodyguard us, should things get out of control, I can't exactly afford paying him his defense fees with the amount of debt I'm in.
"Megumin, Aqua, Darkness, stick with me. We're in enemy territory now, be careful."
"Don't worry Kazuma, if any one of those specters show up I'll blow them away, just how I did to that devil."
"Who are you asking to be careful? All the enemies here are specters right? This is going to be a walk in the park for a goddess like you. You just sit and watch and you can never call me useless again!"
"E-enemy territory? H-help I'm a lost and defenseless pure crusader in enemy territory! Come ravish me with your hundreds of years worth of pent up desires with cowards!"
This is hopeless. These idiots are going to get us all killed.
During the ride on the wagon I'd been bored enough to partially read the lore behind this quest.
Although most of the lord was just a classic unoriginal rpg storyline, I discovered the specters were simply hardcore believers of a minor goddess.
Somehow their devotion was so great that they were able to refuse their own deaths to continue worshipping their goddess.
And if I was a immortal ghost that didn't require eat, sleep or any mortal desires, I'd probably spend my time doing what I loved most.
Which would be video games.
But if we were going to find and fight these specters we'd have to find the church.
"Guys if you see a church tell me! That's where we need to head!"
"You mean that giant castle thingy that has a church symbol on that we were heading towards anyways?"
I looked at Megumin, then at the castle.
"Oh."
Turns out it was a complete waste of time trying to play detective.
At least it kept me occupied during the trip.
The door to the castle opened with a loud screech. It certainly hadn't been used in a while.
I'd like to say we immediately found the specters and engaged in combat, but the castle was completely empty.
Instead we roamed through the castle, looking for any signs of life. Or I guess in this case signs of dead.
The more we walked through the tattered halls, the less sense this quest was starting to make.
It's not like this castle was previously owned by someone who wanted it back. It was also located in the middle of no where, and the specters seemed to be keeping to theirselves just fine. In fact, even deep in their territory we hadn't been approached by a single sign of hostility.
Was I just being paranoid or were we actually being setup by something?
And why did Vanir choose he had to stick with us as a bodyguard? It's unlikely he'd leave his cash alone with Wiz without reasonable suspicion of making more money than what could be lost.
Was I in danger? There's no way Vanir didn't account for Aqua's resurrections when considering how much trouble my party would be in.
The more time we spent silently walking with no conversations or distractions, the more I was beginning to regret taking on this quest.
But the worst case scenario is that I can't be resurrected and I get reborn back in Japan right?
Still better than living in poverty again, right?
Instinctively, I grabbed chunchunmaru out of his sheathe and held in with most hands.
"Is something here Kazuma?"
"No, nothing in particular. Just trying to be prepared just in case."
On the flip side, Aqua seemed completely nonchalant about this whole ordeal. Not really taking precautions or having second thoughts.
Actually now that I think about it that was the case for everyone but me.
Why was I worrying about the quest didn't make sense? All I have to do it leave everything to Aqua since I can't deal with spirits either way. And in return we leave with a fat bag of cash that'll mostly pay back our debts(counting Vanir's cut.)
With my detect enemy ability it's not like I'd be taken out by surprise either.
Was that a flag?
"Oi... Oi Kazuma?"
Megumin poked my ribs with her staff, snapping me out of my thoughts.
We had reached a massive door with a huge religious marking on it. It was pretty obviously a sacred part of the castle.
We tried pushing and pulling the door with all of our might but the door didn't move.
Not even Darkness's elephant strength was able to make this thing budge.
"Kazuma, can I blow it up?"
"No-"
Wait, this could actually work. It's not like we needed Megumin for the specters and ways. If anything she'd probably make more of a mess trying to hit non physical entities just because their swarm "seemed satisfying to blow up."
And if we can't open this door saving her explosion wouldn't matter much.
"Actually, sure go for it."
As discoordinated as we were, everyone understood to back off from the door.
Once we figured we were far enough, we gave Megumin the thumbs up to fire.
I never understood the science behind Megumin's chant for her explosion spell. She seemed to be saying different words every single time and improvised her chant mid sentence at times just because a different way of saying it was "cooler".
I'd once tried investigating with Aqua if she even needed her chant but the results we got from the tests were inconclusive. She refused to read the lines we made for her and instead improvised our lines on the spot while trying to make sure some of her lines contained a part of ours so we wouldn't feel bad.
If her improvising was required or not in her chants or if her chant itself was even required was a mystery to be uncovered.
"EXPLOOOOOOSION!!"
Not like it mattered if it got the job done.
Behind the huge hole blasted into the door a bunch of pale ghostly figures looked through, straight at up.
"WE'VE BEEN DISCOVERED. RETREAT!"
One of the specters made the cry and all the others went into a panic and scattered all around the castle.
Seriously... who paid 50 million just for these guys to be removed.
From the looks of it they seem like they'd willingly move theirselves, even if we don't do anything.
Of course Aqua, being the deranged anti undead maniac she was wasn't going to allow that to happen.
"Holy flash!"
"Exorcism!"
"Exorcism!"
"Sacred Exorcism!!"
In a blinding series of light specters we're deleted by Aqua's hands one by one.
I moved away from the scene to go fetch Megumin from the debris she was laying in. Seems like I over worried after all.
I guess specters could be pretty troublesome to remove without an arch priest.
Some noble probably just wanted to claim this castle as his own.
Once Aqua was satisfied we'll head back to the guild and claim our rewa-
Huh? Where is this... blood coming from. I looked at my hands soaked with a icky red liquid. I clutched my head, only to find half of it to be missing. How am I still functioning?
"Aqua? I think I need some-"
My words got stuck on my own blood.
Why is the ground moving towards me?
So... fast.
I think I could faintly hear the girls screaming. But one voice I clearly heard above all the rest. The voice of a certain crimson demon.
"KAZUMA?"
Hi! Author here just need to quickly talk about my posting schedule and stuff. 1, I'll try to post every 2 weeks or so. 2, I'm looking for an editor that could help review my work for me. 3, I'll try to respond to every comment if you have any questions or stuff that disturb you. 4. Enjoy!