Chapter 20: Small differences

James was woken up by a crash and a shout. He sat up, bolt upright, in his bed and listened with his heart beating. He'd just about managed to convince himself that it had all been in his dream when an almighty wail brought him to his feet.

Sam.

His thoughts immediately going to the Azkaban break-out, he grabbed his wand and rushed down the stairs, meeting a dishevelled Violet on his way down.

"Can't someone shut him up? Some of us are trying to sleep. SAM! Shut your trap!"

The normality of Violet's outburst served to calm James somewhat – maybe it was just an ordinary Saturday morning after all. A silly fight with Anna perhaps. Nothing dramatic.

With the assurance that he was going to see what was going on, he pointed Violet back to her room and took off down the stairs at a more sedate pace. He heard Anna's door open behind him – Sam's screams seemed to have woken up the whole house.

Skipping down the last couple of steps, he hissed at the cold of the hallway tiles under his bare feet and hopped awkwardly to the kitchen door.

His cheerful greeting died on his lips.

As he expected, Lily was comforting Sam. What he hadn't expected was for Lily herself to be visibly upset.

As he stood frozen in the doorway, Lily spotted him and got up from her seat. Walking up to him with a still-sobbing Sam in her arms, she pulled him into a fierce hug. James blinked and, reflexively, his arms went up to hold his wife and son while his eyes roamed the kitchen. But there was no clue as to what had so upset Lily and Sam.

Steadying himself against Lily, he kissed her hair gently and tilted his head to get a good look at her face.

"Everything alright, love?" he asked.

She gave a slight shrug, tightened her grip before letting go. Then, taking a deep breath through her nose, she wiped the tears from her face.

The door opened again, almost hitting James's back.

"What's going on?" Anna asked, looking between her parents.

She took one look at her mother's face, noticing the trace of tears, and instinctively moved closer, clinging to Lily's middle, her normally smiling face tight.

"I'm alright, darling, don't worry," Lily said, running a gentle hand through Anna's messy hair.

"But he said you died!" Sam suddenly wailed, tightening his grasp on his mother's neck. "He said you both died!"

James flinched at the unexpected loudness of Sam's scream so near his ears – before his mind registered Sam's words. He met Lily's eyes. She was blinking away fresh tears.

Still, her voice was level when she answered.

"Sammy, darling, look at me. I'm right here, I didn't die."

"B-b-but, h-he said…" Sam was sobbing so hard that he could barely push out the words.

"Mum? Dad?" Anna said, sounding teary and uncertain.

"Come on, let's sit down," Lily said. "This way, sweetheart. Mind the broken mug. There we go."

Baffled, James repaired the mug with a flick of his wand. Following Lily's lead, he sat down and pulled Anna into his lap. Lily, meanwhile, was trying to loosen Sam's grasp on her neck.

"Come on, darling, let me breathe a little."

Eventually, Sam conceded. His sob subsided to mere hiccups and he settled against Lily's chest. Seeing Sam had calmed down somewhat, Anna squirmed her way out of James's arms and started assembling her breakfast.

"Can I have chocolate on my toast?" she asked, her voice a little too loud and too bright.

"Only if you have a glass of milk with it," James answered mechanically.

Anna pulled a face but poured herself the instructed glass anyway.

James moved his feet to a sun-warmed spot on the kitchen's black and white tiles. Anna had scuttled back to her room, glass of milk and chocolate toast in hand – by the looks of it, Lily seemed more keen to have her out of the way to speak to James than worried about potential crumbs and chocolate stains, so he kept his mouth shut too. Exhausted by his earlier fright, Sam had fallen asleep on Lily's lap, a frown on his freckled face.

Everything was quiet once more and though James was loth to disturb the peace, he wanted to know what had happened to upset Lily so much. Most likely based on Sam's earlier outburst, it was something to do with Harry – the only other 'he' in this house and most conspicuous by his absence…

James assembled two cups of tea with a wave of his wand, took a sip and decided to speak first as Lily didn't seem inclined to.

"What happened?" James asked.

Lily sighed. Reaching for her cup, she took a sip before answering. "I was speaking to Harry. I told him about the spell."

"Ah," James said, taking a sip of his own cup to hide his nervousness. By the looks of it, the conversation hadn't exactly been a success.

"He recognised Petunia's handwriting," Lily carried on. She indicated a postcard on top of the pile of morning post. "So I asked him how he knew her so well, when the rest of the kids haven't even met her." She took a deep breath. "James, we died in his world. And god knows why, but Harry ended up living with Petunia."

Her hands started to shake. She had to put down her cup before she accidentally spilt it all over Sam's sleeping shape. She wiped the tears from her eyes.

Watching her, James felt an uneasy tangle of nerves build in his stomach.

"We did? Do you really think so? He wasn't just saying that, was he…?"

"James," Lily interrupted him. "Just think about it. He's been here for days, and not once have I felt like he recognised anything about us, about our life, about the kids. Petunia's card was the first sign of recognition. And his anger when I pushed him to tell me about his life – it was the first genuine emotion he's shown all week." She stopped, playing with Sam's hair. "I don't think he believed this was real – until now. And it's scared him. I saw the look on his face when he realised how terrified Sam was – how upset I was."

James ran a hand down his face.

"I don't know Lils… It all seems so messed up. How could things be that different in his world – I mean… what could've possibly happened to make it be so different?"

"I don't know," Lily said, sounding defeated. "It's probably a combination of things, small differences – maybe in Harry's world, Peter didn't end up slipping us a sleeping draught?"

James nodded, thoughtful. "That would explain why the blood wards worked. You'd have been awake to activate them…"

"Maybe…"

Sat together in their sunny kitchen, the Potters contemplated what was, and what might have been.

A/N: Happy weekend everyone!