AN: Yes, it's been a while. Sorry! I miss writing too, but baby keeps me busy. Updates will hopefully be closer to once or twice a month from now on. Hope you enjoy!

Also, I couldn't figure out when the Wronski feint was popularized so I took liberties with that.

The rest of the month of February and into March was filled with frantic studying for N.E.W.T.s, application writing for post-graduation jobs, and general panicking.

This was true of all the seventh-year students apart from Hermione. She would join the study sessions of course; however, she had come to admit more and more that she didn't need them in the same way the rest of the students did, which was both reassuring and frightening all at once. Reassuring in that exams were one less thing to worry about and frightening in that she found herself once again topsy turvy from her own sense of normality. Hermione Granger not need to study? Ha!

Yet Hermione was intently studying human behaviour, mannerisms, and interactions. She hadn't been a poor judge of character prior to time traveling, hadn't she? She'd been able to deduce certain secrets before being told outright. Lupin was a werewolf, Umbridge was a ministry plant, the Department of Mysteries was a trap…

Now it felt a lot more difficult. Despite Hermione having come from the future and theoretically being "ahead of the game" timewise, she was in the dark to quite a few people's motives. She had even gone to Dumbledore about it.

After sharing her suspicions and concerns about some of the girls' actions- Lily, Calliope, even Elpida, who had been oddly too trusting of her given the circumstances- Hermione waited for the headmaster's commentary.

He didn't appear concerned. He merely stroked his beard and looked across the room at nothing in particular.

"Anything with Professor Karkaroff?"

Hermione hesitated. She didn't want to get Severus in trouble, but… he was already on the path to getting himself in trouble for the next few years without her interference. "He appears to have given Severus Snape a very valuable item." At Dumbledore's inquisitive look, she continued. "A Firebird feather."

"I see." If Albus Dumbledore was surprised to hear this information, he didn't show it. "Did Mr. Snape tell you how this occurred?"

It was an exchange, Severus had told her. It sounded like a typical Slytherin barter. But what the Firebird feather was given in exchange for, he wouldn't say.

"Not really," she answered.

Dumbledore did not appear put out, simply walking leisurely around the office. "Any plans for the summer then, Miss Perri?"

Hermione shuffled her feet. "Still deciding," she answered finally.

"Well, once you decide, do let me know. I may have some work for you… if you don't go too far."

"I shall need to save up funding. I have gotten confirmation."

Hermione and Severus were in the library together at a table late one evening in mid-March. Severus looked weary and slightly gaunt in the face, clearly sharing in the same tired and frantic energy that was sweeping the student body. Despite her assured job offer, Elpida had made herself scarce recently due to studying, Lily and Calliope had each sported bags under their eyes the last time Hermione had seen either, and even Arabella was concerned about flunking her Potions N.E.W.T. and being unable to advance as far as she wanted in healing, pestering Slughorn for extra review sessions.

"Confirmation?"

"I have received an acceptance letter for a potions mastery programme."

"That's so wonderful, Severus!" Hermione jumped up excitedly, though Severus hushed her and quickly indicated she should sit again.

"It's from Michel de Grasse, the French potioneer. He's the best in Europe. Now is the time to pursue an apprenticeship with him, especially as he's 130 now and unlikely to take on many more apprentices in future years." Severus said this flatly and still looked exhausted, not appearing pleased at the news.

"Why is it you don't look happy about this?" Hermione whispered confusedly, her face falling slightly.

"Well firstly, the acceptance letter is conditional. I mentioned previously that many of these mastery programmes require books and ingredient banks in order to begin." He glanced up at Hermione and she nodded in recognition. "One of the reasons Monsieur de Grasse is so prominent is that he only takes on apprentices who possess the rarest ingredients or potions in their banks. The apprentices aren't made to use them or give them up to him during their training, but the rarity of the potions act as a boost of the students' credentials. It is simply another way of de Grasse ensuring his pupils are seen by all as crème de la crème, and it naturally keeps him known as the best Potions Master in this part of the world."

"Do you not have anything rare enough to qualify you to him?"

"No. Not to start an apprenticeship within the year, at least. I told you I might have to work and save up the funds. It may also be the case that I have to prove my value by presenting a potion that takes at least six months to brew, which I would also need to delay for."

Hermione frowned, puzzling out this newfound dilemma. "You said 'firstly' earlier. Was there another problem?"

Severus glowered. "Monsieur de Grasse runs a tight regimen. His apprentices graduate quickly- I should certainly finish within two years, perhaps sooner. The workload allows only one weekend a month off…" Severus trailed off and eyed her meaningfully.

"That's a tradeoff of completing the programme faster I suppose," Hermione reasoned, nodding.

"I am loathe to accept, though I know it is a great opportunity. It would mean little time off." Severus looked pained. "Little time to see you."

Hermione blanched, feeling guilty. "You shouldn't make a decision on my account!"

There was a slight pause. "Why not?"

Because you shouldn't rely on my sticking around. I have a future to return to.

She couldn't say that.

"I… I don't want you giving up opportunities for my sake." She didn't meet his eyes.

"Why not?" No pause this time.

She looked up at him then. Severus was still even-toned and still looked exhausted, yet despite no change in his manner, Hermione felt the conversation was slowly gaining importance.

"If you recall," he continued slowly, "pursuing a potions mastery now was your… very fervent suggestion."

"Suggestion! Only a suggestion!" Hermione gaped, trying not to become affronted at the implication. "You cannot say that I am forcing you into it-"

"I've said nothing of the kind," he continued evenly, refusing to be enveloped by any hasty emotion in his tired state. "I enjoy the study of potions- I always have- and the choice makes sense based on my aptitudes and future career prospects."

Severus' eyes locked into Hermione's fiercely and intently during the pregnant pause before he spoke again. "However," he drawled silkily, "it is a decision I do make on your account, and I fully expect to give up other opportunities for your sake."

Hermione bit down hard on her lip. He was only making his intentions towards her quite clear again. The longer she spent in a relationship with Severus, the stronger her elation at being cared about so deeply and the more magnified her guilt at her own deceptions to him.

She could give him no such promise in return, could she?

No wonder he would go back to loving Lily. Hermione could hardly even blame him for that.

"Well," Hermione cleared her throat. "I have an idea then about the rare ingredient- so you don't have to waste any time working to save up money for purchasing one."

"Go on."

"I'll just give you back the Firebird feather. It's supposed to be a catalyst in spells and potions, right? You wouldn't even have to use it up since the potions master just takes it as a good mark on a CV, so it would still be fine for future use. That should be enough proof…"

Hermione trailed off as Severus got to his feet and collected his things hastily. His patience had clearly held out long enough.

"I gave it to you," he hissed at her as he angrily made to leave. "Are you rejecting the reassurances you begged me for? I swore to you that you are more than my consort, that you are precious to me… it is now that you say not to make you promises, not to change my plans for you, and you try to return the most valuable thing I have ever laid eyes on which I gifted to you?"

Severus stormed off. After the initial surprise wore off, Hermione was left feeling far guiltier and stupider than she had felt in quite a while.

The next time they saw each other was also the next time the rest of the weary, overly-exhausted students came up for air briefly from their studies and applications. It was finally time for the next "special event" Dumbledore had appointed in honour of the visiting transfer students- the March vendor weekend and the Hogsmeade trivia contest. On Saturday morning after a late breakfast, the students all began to gather in the chilly courtyard, bundled up with hats and gloves and a few warming charms.

While previously, the students would receive free mugs of butterbeer for correctly answering year-appropriate questions, now the prize would be in galleons. The winner of the trivia contest would earn a credit of 100 galleons to the Hogsmeade shop of their choice. Honeydukes and Zonko's were the top preferences for the monetary credit if you polled the chattering gatherers in the Hogwarts courtyard, with Gladrags Wizardwear and Spintwitches Sporting Needs close behind.

It was decided that each house would first whittle down the competitors internally before presenting one final contestant. Hermione made her way to the corner of the courtyard designated for the Gryffindors, near the Dogweed and Deathcap vendor cart. Professor McGonagall addressed the crowd of students.

"I suggest, for the sake of expediency and a house victory, we limit the competition to 5th year students and above." There were groans and heated protests in response to this and the woman didn't blink. "Can any 1st through 4th year can tell me the five ingredients involved in a rejuvenation draught?" She paused for a brief moment to allow answers. "No? What about the difference between the transfiguration methods of metamorphizing and altercomposing? How about the best spell to use if you are trapped in a maze while blindfolded?" At the lack of responses, she grimaced slightly but nodded, the reaction expected. "Well then, let's begin by having a line of those upper years. Form a line behind Mr. Peakley here!"

The three questions McGonagall had posed to the younger students also stumped a few of the older ones and it was no surprise at all to Hermione that only the seventh year Gryffindors were able to answer her questions correctly. McGonagall seemed to believe the best method was to focus on academics, though Hermione believed the butterbeer contests had previously involved general wizarding trivia. Even if she ended up winning for Gryffindor, there could be a Quidditch question later that would trip her up.

Sure enough, following a few successful rounds of narrowing the Gryffindors down, Madam Hooch chastised McGonagall for the subject favoritism and a few flying and Quidditch-themed questions were added.

This is what tripped up Lily, putting Hermione down as the final Gryffindor female. Lupin was the final male Gryffindor, but there was finally a question with the answer of "Wolfsbane potion" which he appeared that he would rather not answer correctly. Professor McGonagall narrowed her eyes, but otherwise showed no reaction to his choice to feign ignorance. Hermione was therefore declared the Gryffindor representative and made her way to the center of the courtyard.

The Hufflepuff representative, a sandy-haired male Hermione didn't recognize, was waiting there already. Ravenclaw and Slytherin were still deciding on their choices. The Ravenclaws appeared to have offered the opportunity up to all years, so the questioning was taking longer than it had for Gryffindor. Slytherin House, meanwhile, had formed a circle and there seemed to be a heated argument going on amongst the upper years.

Finally, Calliope emerged as the Ravenclaw winner, though it appeared she had only just edged out Elpida and Mateo Reinero, both looking disappointed and frustrated with themselves. As Callie came to stand beside Hermione, she followed Hermione's confused frown in the direction of the Slytherins. Severus was snarling at John Avery III, who was wearing a smug look on his face.

Calliope said, "They're going to lose."

Hermione turned toward her. "Confident, aren't you?"

"Not as much about my own ability as I am about their methods. Watch. You'll see what I mean." Hermione looked back to see Snape stalking away from the courtyard angrily and Regulus Black emerging as the representative.

"He's a sixth year." Hermione commented, cocking her head in assessment. "He must be very bright to beat out all the others."

"No, they didn't use the same methods. He was elected by popular vote," Callie explained. "Weren't you elected too, Thornburg?" She asked the Hufflepuff nearby.

"That's right!" Thornburg said brightly. "I'll do my best for my house."

"He'll probably lose too," Callie whispered to Hermione. "Popularity won't determine skill."

Because Regulus is in charge of recruitment, perhaps? Hermione thought to herself. This way the whole school will know his name even if he doesn't win in the end? No wonder Severus is upset. Regulus doesn't need the money even if he does win.

Professors Flitwick, Sprout, McGonagall, and Slughorn began the questioning as all of Hogwarts looked on and cheered on their own House representative.

As Callie so astutely predicted, the boys were quickly wheedled out. First Thornburg on a fairly simple Charms question, then after a few rounds, the younger Black on a somewhat more difficult question regarding runes.

Hermione was given the Quidditch question, and she could feel Callie's smirk from two yards away.

"This seeker for the Grodzisk Goblins recently had a move named after him and added to the book, Quidditch: An instructive guide." Professor Sprout read the question off a piece of parchment that had just been shoved into her hands by Hooch, who was cackling with excitement somewhere to Hermione's left.

Great, well… might as well guess since I don't know the answer. I do know the name of one move. It's not Wonky, that Viktor kept doing- what was it? Ron kept telling me…

"Wronski?"

"I…er…" Sprout didn't seem to know the answer either.

"YES! JOSEF WRONSKI!" Hooch shouted with glee.

"Well done, Miss Perri." McGonagall interjected, glaring at Hooch for interrupting the proceedings. "Though if current and historical events are allowable subjects…" Minerva McGonagall narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips, looking quite catlike in her pondering state. "Miss Cohen, who is…"

Hermione suddenly had trouble concentrating as her eyes drifted upward. As livid as he had been, Severus hadn't left completely. He was just beyond the courtyard, hovering above one of the covered walkways on his broom. Perhaps not close enough to hear, but close enough to see her.

"And you, Miss Perri?"

"Hmm?" Hermione's gaze shot back to Professor McGonagall.

"Attention, Perri. Miss Cohen does not know the answer to the question. If you do, then you will be our winner."

"I apologize, Professor. Can you please repeat the question?" Even before she heard the question, Hermione felt that slight vertigo pull she had become familiar with.

She suspected fate gave her the win.

Flitwick repeated it instead. "Who is the French potioneer and alchemist that is known for the creation of the Philosopher's Stone?"

Hermione grinned and looked up at Severus as she answered. "Nicholas Flamel."

The next few minutes were a haze of celebration from the Gryffindors, almost as excited as they were to win the House Cup or a Quidditch game. Hermione was rushed by jubilant friends, Marina shrieking happily, Lily and Arabella grabbing her and trying to tug her towards the cart they wanted her to choose. This was soon forgotten as Madam Rosmerta shouted out an offer of a free pint of butterbeer for all Gryffindors to celebrate. There was a roar of approval from the crowd and it began to be difficult to hear.

Snape was no longer floating above the courtyard, but Hermione's decision about the shop of choice had been made long before.

"Where do you want your 100-galleon credit, Miss Perri?" Flitwick shouted over the din.

"J. Pippin's Potions, Professor," she answered loudly. Only Elpida, who had appeared beside her, took notice of her choice and gave her an exasperated look.

After some obligatory celebration which included grabbing food for lunch from a few different carts and chatting with Elpida about the Department of Transportation's requirements, Hermione was able to sneak away into the darker cutouts of the covered walkway surrounding the courtyard, where she anticipated finding Severus.

He was waiting for her, leaning against the stone wall quietly, hands in his trouser pockets.

"Here!" Hermione excitedly thrust a scroll of parchment into his chest. He had to rapidly take his hands out of his pockets to hold both it and her smiling figure launched against him. "One hundred galleons should certainly be enough money to purchase an ingredient store and books for an apprenticeship!" She beamed up at him, pleased she could help in this way.

"No." Severus appeared touched, but unsurprised by her generosity. "I won't take an opportunity from you. You could use it for-"

Hermione barked out a surprised but congenial laugh. "What? You won't want me giving up opportunities for your sake?"

She grinned at him knowingly and he couldn't help but slowly smirk back at her, given their last argument.

"Please take it," she said softly, brushing his face softly with her glove. "Like I took the feather."

Severus crushed her against him fully and kissed her. After a few long and languid kisses, he slowly pulled away, keeping their foreheads together.

"Thank you," he said sincerely. His eyes held much expression, as if he had much more he wished to say but decided against it. After Hermione was nearly lost in those dark eyes, he pulled his head back and cleared his throat.

"However," he swallowed, "there is still the rare ingredient or potion. This," he held up the parchment, nodding to it before placing it in his inner robe pocket, "will be sufficient to purchase a basic ingredient bank, books, and perhaps even supplies to brew something rare enough to present for the apprenticeship…"

"But?" She frowned, wrinkling her nose.

"But there is still the time it would take to brew that. For example, Felix Felicis is six months if done perfectly the first time, let alone allowing for repeat trials of the initial stages. It is March now, and I would need to be prepared to begin the apprenticeship in August. July would be better." Severus sighed and brought his hand up to brush away a curl of Hermione's that was loose from the bun under her hat. "Delay may still be necessary."

"Are you trying to delay, Severus?" Hermione asked quietly.

Severus' lips tightened. "I would not toy with you-"

"No, no, I just mean… what do you prefer? Am I pushing a timeline on you?"

He relaxed. "No, I simply wish to do it all correctly." He paused before nodding slightly. "I do… I do loathe the thought of being parted from you… but I am not deceiving you about the necessary steps."

"Severus," she brought both hands up to his cheeks and held his face. "If you will not take the Firebird feather-"

"I will not," he said heatedly.

"Then I have a gift for you," Hermione continued without skipping a beat. "Please do not make me insist on your having it…This…gift… I will not beg…" Hermione had begun to blush and she had unwittingly succeeding in getting Severus to sport a confused look in response to her sudden change in demeanor.

"Hermione?" She was very red now and could not look him in the eye, and despite still holding his face in her hands she was looking off to the side.

When she finally spoke, it was quite rapidly. "If it is as you say that the rare ingredient must only be presented as credential and never need be used, then I freely offer it to you."

She buried her face in his chest, her hands slipping down to his shoulders. Severus rubbed her back gently but after a few moments, cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, darling… I don't believe you actually told me what it was you were offering me." He said, half-amused, half-baffled.

She whispered something into his cloak.

"Come again?"

"Sanguine Virginis," she whispered a little louder, turning her bright red face upwards and finally meeting his eyes. "Virgin's blood. Don't make me insist." She buried her face back into his chest as he held her closely.

Severus' face slowly went through phases of stunned shock, elation, and determination.

"Hermione," he said hoarsely, "you are… you…"

A shriek pierced the courtyard. Hermione gasped and immediately pushed away from Severus and took off running. After a muffled curse, he dashed after her, easily catching her up with his long strides. They came upon Lily and Marina crouched over Arabella, who was lying on the ground, shaking violently.

"She's been cursed!" Lily shouted. "It came from over there!" She pointed to Severus' left and he went running in that direction, wand at the ready.

"LILY! BEHIND YOU!" Marina screamed, pointing in the opposite direction.

A dementor was gliding toward Lily, head now turned around to see it. She was still crouched down over Arabella, and not in an easy position to twist and stand. Lily's mouth opened in further shock, clearly not yet prepared to leap into action.

"Expecto Patronum!" Hermione leapt in front of Lily, thrust out her wand, and shouted out without thinking, her heart pounding with adrenaline. A bright white light burst from her wand, quickly taking shape and pursuing the dementor head on.

The cloaked dementor retreated immediately but oddly turned into whisps of smoke, dissolving into a dark-haired figure which lay on the floor, bleeding profusely from the neck and spitting out blood.

"Riddikulus!" Hermione shouted quickly, hoping no one had figured out what she had. Nothing could make that scene funny for her, and it seemed the boggart knew it. With a pop the figure extinguished.

Hermione's patronus galloped up to her after performing its duty against the faux dementor and, still in shock from what had just happened, let alone the form she saw, she couldn't think what to do.

"Pomfrey." She turned to see Severus back at the scene, having heard the commotion and realized the perpetrator of the curse was long gone. He was gripping his wand tightly, looking almost angry. "Tell it to fetch Pomfrey," he said coldly.

"I- yes." Hermione turned back to the patronus. "Go tell Madam Pomfrey there's a student who's been cursed." She watched the silver stag gallop outward and upwards toward the hospital wing.

Lily and Marina were crouched over Arabella, muttering countercurses to no avail. Severus simply stood by watching Hermione stonily.

"I- it wasn't really a dementor, it was a boggart." Hermione said monotonously.

"I know!" Lily said exasperatedly over her shoulder as Marina took over trying spells. "I've always been afraid of them- heard about them since- well, before Hogwarts, at least. I'm sorry if that confused you, Annie, but you had a handle on it."

"What happened?"

"I can't figure it out, Lily!" Marina whined frustratedly. Lily glared at her and tried a few more spells as Marina explained, "we were all just chatting, the three of us and someone hit Arabella from behind."

"They must have released the boggart beforehand as a distraction- or gotten someone else to do it," Hermione frowned, trying to puzzle out the situation.

"Your patronus is a stag." Severus said flatly. The other girls must not have heard him, but Hermione blushed. She understood what that must mean.

Of course, it's a stag… because his is a doe. He's still in love with Lily… Severus will always be in love with Lily. And here I'm offering him my virginity…

Once the hospital matron arrived, Hermione followed Madam Pomfrey and the girls to the hospital wing silently, thoughts flooding her mind and nearly drowning her in anxiety and confusion.

Was this attack meant for Lily?

I should have been here! I need to be more… vigilant. Constant vigilance! Remember what the mission is for! Not for Severus, but for Lily. For Lily and James Potter.

So Harry can exist. So Harry can defeat Voldemort.

It was so easy to forget about all of that now.

Severus remained behind. He watched the Gryffindor girls hurry away as he was left in the cold, darkening courtyard.

Potter. Fucking potter yet again.

He slumped against the stone wall.

There was another, she said. Though nothing ever came of it. Potter is the bloke she knew from before. Must be with that patronus. How common could it be?

He snarled. She could have met him anywhere. Italy, England, bloody Antarctica with the money he comes from, he can travel the world and get any witch he wants.

I'll kill him, then she can get over him. I'm not having him as a rival anymore, the prat. He can't have all the women here. Yes, I'll kill him, that's it.

He exhaled deeply, trying to calm himself.

No, wait, Severus, don't burn the world down yet.

She's chosen you. Keep at the pursuit. She wants a full magical bond with you! An offer to join the bloodlines…

Yes, the patronus is a stag, but hearts can change. Even if she loved him before, even if she loves him now, her heart can change- she said she was in danger of falling… Surely her heart must be close.

Severus lifted himself up, his throat still tight, but his fear of losing Hermione had morphed just as quickly into determination.

He couldn't push Hermione away now out of resentment or fear, no matter what his instincts were telling him. After all, then he would lose her completely.

She must stay away from Potter.