Hello :P It is the first Wednesday of November so that means I am uploading all Ash and Misty themed stories this month starting today. Like every year, this tradition follows the themes from Tumblr's PokeShipping Week. There were lots of themes to choose from this year but today's chapter is "Mermaid Misty and Aura Guardian Ash". I knew what exactly I wanted this fic to be as soon as I read that prompt and it turned out pretty close to how I imagined. It shows one of the occasions that Ash sneaks into where Misty is sleeping when she's having her intermittent unconscious spells during the darkness saga. I hope you enjoy!
Ages:
Ash: 30
Misty: 30
Disclaimer: I own the story and the OCs only :3
I clenched my jaw together hard to stop my teeth from chattering together and I pulled my back legs closer to my chest, cuddling as close to the sleeping body as I could. I was under the duvet but still, I couldn't get warm. It was the middle of the night but still, I couldn't sleep. My body was shivering. My brain was alive. My heart was aching. I felt sick. It was one of those horrible moments when it is only you awake during the witching hour and everything feels wrong. You want to drift off into peaceful sleep but you can't. Everything is wrong. Nothing is right. And so, you lie awake, and you try to stop your thoughts from lingering on times when it was actually happy.
James had fallen asleep in the other quarter of the private hospital room with Rey hours ago. I knew that he had dealt with a brain and heart that was racing just like mine was but somehow he had managed to switch off. With the dark chestnut haired new-born baby lying close to his side, he had headed off to sleep and experience a world that was much happier than ours was.
No one else was around. It was just me. It was just me. It was just me and Misty. My heart throbbed even further at the thought of the orange haired woman and my closed eyelids pricked with tears. I snuggled closer to her, the pang in my chest getting all the worse. It was unfair. It was so unfair. I just wanted her to be awake. I just wanted her to be okay. I just wanted things to be different. But they weren't. Things weren't different. And I was having a hard time letting go of the fantasy that things could have ended up different.
James had felt the same way. Even though he had climbed into bed with a frown on his forehead and a whimpering baby at his side, he had fallen into a rather peaceful sleep. It hadn't always been that way. It hadn't always been that easy-going. In fact, that day he had gotten into a fight with his orange haired best friend while she was actually awake.
Needless to say, it wasn't a very passionate fight, but it had been a heart-aching one nonetheless. They had argued. They had disagreed. They had begged. It was all rather silly, really. Misty was certain that she was right. James was certain that he was right. I didn't know how to know who was right. I was caught in the middle.
I sniffed. Looking back, I wished that I had sided with the orange haired woman. It would have been unfair on the lavender haired male, I know, but still. If I had, then maybe she would have drifted off into another bought of sleepiness okay. Maybe she would've drifted off peacefully. Maybe she wouldn't have slipped away from us all over again with a frown on her face.
I gulped. I wished that things could have been different. I wished that it could have all been different. But it wasn't. It wasn't different. It was the middle of the night. I was awake. There were no human sounds to me that I could hear. Apart from my own heart hammering in my ears. Apart from the sadness that seemed to speak to me. Those were the only noises. I wished that there would be more noises than just the ones that I was making. And that was one of my wishes that actually came true.
I heard it right away. In fact, I felt it right away. I didn't need to hear it at all. I felt it. I felt a presence so strong and so familiar that it caused my heart to swell in my chest. I felt that way when he was just coming down the hall. I felt even more that way when he paused outside the door and lightly put his hand on the doorknob. My heart swelled so much that I almost couldn't breathe. But I had to keep breathing. I had to see what was next.
I exited out of the duvet and climbed up onto Misty's pillow instead. There, I waited. My heart-rate seemed to slow down. It thudded in my ears still but it was slower than before. It was waiting. It was hopeful. It was sensing something. It knew that something was about to happen. And it was.
The door handle turned properly with a squeak. The door clicked as it unlocked. A cold breeze from the hospital halls entered as the door properly opened. It was presently shut as soon as the person entered. I didn't dare look. I didn't dare open my eyes. Though more than ever in my entire life, I wanted to spring my eyes open and spring to life and see what was shockingly actually happening, I didn't do any of those things. I did the right thing. That time, I did the right thing. I pretended to be asleep.
The raven haired male was holding his breath as soon as he entered the hospital room. Straight away, he noticed how cold it was. All of the windows were shut tight to protect the new-born baby and her vulnerable mother but it was still so cold. It was chilling. It was ghostly.
He rubbed his gloveless hands together before his fingers moved to his arms to rub them. Then, he tiptoed towards the bed. His breath held even more. I swore that I could hear or at the very least, I was imagining his heart thudding slowly throughout his body. It was almost in slow motion, like mine was. Nothing really seemed to be happening for him. Nothing really seemed to be happening for me either. But it was. It was happening. Slowly but surely, things were happening.
Ash moved closer to his bed where his unconscious wife lay and after lingering over her for a few moments, his shaky legs guided him so he was sitting down on the bed next to her. He gave me a brief glance. I know he did. I wanted more than ever to open my eyes for him. My eyes were watering and stinging and shaking from behind closed lids. But I persevered. I kept them tightly shut and pretended to keep on sleeping. It felt the wrong thing to do for me. But I knew it was the right thing to do for him. It was the right thing to do for them.
My raven haired best friend looked away from me almost as soon as his gaze had glanced my way. Even though it pained him, even though it made him want to shake and cry and curse or perhaps even yell or scream, he looked at his wife. He looked at his sleeping wife. He looked at her as she slept and breathed and knew that she was in that position because of him. There was no escaping it.
"Oh, Mist…" he breathed out hoarsely and stopped his fingers from lingering on his own arms and, trembling, reached out to hold her hand. It was soft and warm and James had painted her nails. It was smooth and it was small. It was home. Ash quickly got more choked up. But he almost sucked all of his emotions back in and forced himself to continue numbly. "I wish that you were awake like how for the past few times I've come, you've begun to open your eyes. But it's for the best. No one can know. Maybe we both can know. But no one else can."
My eyes urged me and were desperate to open but I remained strong. I remained in control. That's how I felt, but a bigger part of myself felt something else. I felt the urge to gasp. I felt the urge to weep. Misty had been right. I had been right by wanting to believe that she was right. Ash had been visiting.
While no one else was around and while his orange haired love of his life was dozing, he had been visiting. I loved him for that. It made me understand that despite everything he was going through, he was still in there. I disliked him for that also. My eyes filled with confused tears. If he could visit her once or twice, why couldn't he come back for good?
"I will never ever forgive myself for doing this to you or for our little baby either. And that's making my head hurt more. That's making the darkness worse. But I deserve it. I hurt you. I damaged you. I endangered you." The raven haired male's voice squeaked with remorse at the end of his words and as he bowed his head down towards his wife's hand, a tear fell on it. It was just one tear. It was just one tiny tear. But it was enough. Nobody had noticed. But it was enough. "Why couldn't things be different? Why did things end up the way they did? Why can't they be different?"
The next sound that filled our ears sounded like happiness and sadness all in one. It was a strange mixture. But it was a mixture that got our attention right away.
All of Misty's fingers twitched moved as she came back out of one of her deep sleeps and even though, apart from that, she didn't move in any way, she spoke to her husband. In a slow and groggy voice, she spoke to her husband. She spoke to Ash.
"They could be different…" she murmured to him and while I fought back a gasp, the raven haired male didn't share the same reaction as me. I didn't know why. Maybe it was too soon for him to react. Or maybe it was because he'd had conversations with that orange haired woman for the last twenty years of his life. It was like coming home. Even though everything was wrong between them, she was still his home. "Things could be different…"
"B-But how…?" my best friend asked his wife desperately and huskily, holding onto her hand tighter than he ever had before while making sure he wasn't being too forceful or clumsy. His eyelids were shaking. They were about to drip tears. He shook his head at himself. He couldn't believe that he was getting advice from her even after everything. I couldn't either. "H-How Mist?"
The orange haired woman was slow to answer him and it was torture to the raven haired Pokémon Master. But she didn't do it out of spite, of course she didn't. She had just woken up. She had fallen asleep insisting to her best friend that her husband had visited her a few nights before and she had woken up to that being true all over again. It was a lot to focus on. It was a lot to absorb.
But she wasn't fixating on any of that. She was focusing on him. She was focusing on giving him the answers that he needed. She spoke slowly and gathered her thoughts slowly but everything she did was from the heart.
"M… Make them different, Ash." She told the love of her life as she leaned back against her pillow and surprisingly showed off a tiny smile. I could see it from the sliver-like crack in my eyelids. She had positivity. She had positivity for her husband. Even in that situation. Even after everything he caused her. And this caused him to become very overwhelmed suddenly.
"I can't, okay?!" he snapped towards her rather loudly and dropped her hand before he was instantly filled with regret. Misty had barely reacted or barely cared but he shook his head at himself to shake away the dark part of himself that had taken over him briefly. And as soon as he had gotten rid of him completely, his eyes quickly filled with even more tears. And they dripped down his face. "I-I can't, Mist, okay? I… I wish I could, but I can't. It isn't that easy. It's not easy for me. It's not easy for anybody. So just drop it!"
And drop it Misty did. Even though she had only mentioned it once, she dropped it. And her shoulders dropped also. They slumped. Her eyes shut all over again. She stopped smiling. She started shaking. And even though it was Ash who had caused her to react like that and had caused almost every single emotion in her in the past few weeks, she reached her hand back out to him.
She still had memories of him apart from all of his dark aura problems. She still had many wonderful memories. And even though he didn't sometimes look like him, he was still the man that she married. He was still the man that she adored. He was still in there. He was still positive and warm and gentle and encouraging. Or at least, he would be that when he shook away his demons for good.
Misty continued shaking all over, even though she tried to block it how. That was how she had dealt with most of the things she came up against since Ash left. She blocked it out. She knew that he was hurting and broken and it was easier to focus on being sympathetic towards him than it was to be loving towards herself. But in that moment, despite the fact she still knew that the raven haired man was her beloved, she had come face to face with how broken she was as well.
Her husband had run away from her and her family the minute that their new baby had entered the world. He had taken off. He had been taken over by a cloud of darkness and he had fled somewhere. She had slipped into unconsciousness right away. James had been forced to take care of the baby. Everybody in the situation was broken too. But she was as well.
She had to deal with another man running out on her after her father had done the same. She had to deal with another man giving up because of the demons that they faced. It happened to her a second time. And because they had both given up, she had given up too.
She had pulled through bit by bit and day by day since. She had started to have some hope back. But it wasn't enough. Only Ash was enough. And in that moment, I didn't think that I would ever feel the same way about him again until he put everything that was wrong, to rights.
"I-I'm sorry, Mist, okay? I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. But I can't change what I did. And I can't come back either. There's so much to fix and I'm not ready to do it. I'm not ready to do it alone. I deserve to be alone and I will have to do it alone but I'm not ready. I want to help you but I need helping. I-"
"I need helping…" the orange haired female opened her eyes once again and whispered to her husband and this was almost the moment where I had to give up and stop pretending to sleep. I had to help her. But luckily, like she often did with her own personal strength, she helped herself. She explained herself. She whispered a second time while Ash frantically wiped his eyes. "Tell me a story where it's all different."
Ash had heard many things come out of his former Pokémon Journey companion's mouth many times in his life. But somehow, that was the thing that stunned him. That was the thing that silenced him. I had to try even harder to pretend to keep on sleeping when he briefly glanced at me for answers. I didn't give him anything. I wasn't giving him anything. He looked back at his wife again. And because he was so confused and so vulnerable, even more tears came.
But he didn't express it. He didn't express them. Something inside him clicked. He was vulnerable. He was confused. He didn't know what was what. But one thing he did know was that his wife was strong. The mother of his children was strong. And when she needed something, she asked for it. She asked him for a story. So instead of telling her that he didn't know any stories or that he wasn't very good at making up stories, he complied for her. He complied for the loyal love of his life.
Slowly, he nodded his head and moved closer on the bed to her. She was still clinging onto his hand and since dropping it, he had entwined it in his all over again. And he was using his other hand to softly and tenderly brush the bangs away from her eyes.
"Okay, Mist…" he spoke to her and it was a hushed and level tone that I hadn't heard in a while. Misty hadn't either. It bought butterflies to her stomach. It had the same effect on me. I pretended to slide back under the covers while I slept but really I was finally opening my eyes while I was hidden. Tears flowed out as soon as my pupils were revealed. But it was good. They were good tears. "Shall we see how different it is for Mermaid Misty and Aura Guardian Ash, then?"
The raven haired male's words were said thickly and half-jokingly but as soon as Misty nodded her head before nuzzling her forehead groggily against his hand, he knew what he had to do. Ash knew what he had to do. He had to give her what she wanted. He had to tell her a story. He had to distract them both by beginning to tell a story. He did it in his own way, of course.
"Well, Mermaid Misty was giving birth in a hospital and because she had been out of the water for quite some time, she had developed legs instead of her fins. You know how it is. She was okay with that. Anything for her new little baby." Ash recounted to Misty and he showed off a strong start. He started wavering when he came to the subject of doing anything for their new-born baby. That was something that he hadn't done. That's how he felt anyway.
But in that moment, it wasn't about him. Like he had to try and force away the dark aura from taking over his body and his brain, he had to keep his mind focused on story telling instead of the reality that we all were facing. It became a bit easier for him after Misty nuzzled his hand once again and he focused on her face.
"So as we join their story, Mermaid Misty is giving birth but it's going quickly because it's baby number five. She has her husband, Aura Guardian Ash at her side. He's a handsome fellow. Very strong and very stable. Pirate James is there too for moral support. He's a little annoying and a little stinky but they owe him thanks after he reunited Aura Guardian Ash with his Father."
And for the first time I had seen her do properly in many weeks, Misty smiled. She smiled for her husband. She smiled for the story that he was telling her and she smiled for the digs he was giving her best friend even in the fictional realm. Her eyelids crinkled at the side. She felt at home. She felt at home with Ash. She felt at home with Ash telling her stories. That was a new thing for them. But it was a good thing. And it was a moment that she would treasure forever.
"Mermaid Misty has just a few pushes left until their beautiful little baby is born. Aura Guardian Ash is ecstatic. Seeing his wife bringing into the world a child that they both made is the best moment of his life. Along with the other times that happened, of course. Pirate James is happy for them too. But all that really matters is the two new people who are about to be parents. And Aura Guardian Ash's loyal Pikachu too, of course."
I lump quickly filled my throat upon hearing this and my heart soared before it clenched when Ash briefly moved his hand away from Misty's to pat over the duvet where I had slipped under before. Even more tears filled my eyes. I tried not to gulp too loudly. But it was no good. I got the feeling that he knew I was awake. But he wasn't mad. He was silently appreciative. He knew that I was giving them their well-deserved moment. I was. I wanted more than ever to join them, but that's what love was. It was letting two people have their time together, despite the fact you wanted to be there as well. That's what love was. And love was also Ash doing his best to overcome his darkness, even though it had gone unnoticed and underappreciated.
"Pirate James wiped Mermaid Misty's brow for her. It was time for the last push. And when it was time for the last push, Aura Guardian Ash began to feel a little funny. He began to feel a sensation that he knew all too well. He tried to push it away but it was coming. It was coming for him and it was strong and it was scary and it was overwhelming and it was dark and-"
"Ash…" Misty whispered Ash and because I could feel my heart cracking all over again hearing my best friend describe in his own way how he had actually felt, I assumed that her voice would come out broken. But it didn't. It was calm. It was soft. It was loving. And that's why they were so perfect for one and other. Despite the imperfections and the imperfect times, they were truly right for one and other. They helped one and other. Without even intending to.
Just the sound of Misty saying his name and holding his hand tighter all over again gave Ash the courage to persevere through. At first, he blinked and tilted his head and it was apparent that he almost hadn't noticed what he had been saying. But he noticed after it was all over. And instead of blushing and getting embarrassed and making his snappy side take over again, he just exhaled. And he went back to telling the story like he had promised. He was starting to progress.
"Aura Guardian felt all of these things. But instead of letting them engulf him, he looked around the room. He looked at Pirate James. He was a good person despite the past and his occupation and the name. He looked down and imagined the life that was about to enter the world. It was surely going to be yet another priceless addition to the family. And then he looked at Mermaid Misty. She was the love of his life. She was his home. She was his reason. She was his reason to think everything was okay. And everything would be okay because they were in love. They had their love. And as long as they were together, they would be okay. And they were…"
Upon hearing these words, Misty let out a contented sigh. Her eyes had fluttered shut all over again and she was beginning to feel very relaxed, especially when he husband stroked her bangs for a second time. But when she heard him trail off, she knew she had to open her eyes. He didn't sound very vulnerable. He didn't sound very broken. He just sounded rather thoughtful. And she knew that could lead onto other things. So she opened her eyes. At first, she didn't say anything and she just looked at her husband.
She looked at him. She properly looked at him. She had assumed that the next time she properly gazed upon his face, she would be filled with conflict and sadness and pain. But she didn't feel any of those things. Well, maybe she felt a shiver of a percentage of those things. But mostly she just felt empathy. And she just felt love.
He was broken. He was a broken human. But that was okay. He didn't have to be okay all of the time. He was still warm and genuine and encouraging and snarky. He was still Ash. And somehow from hiding under the covers, I could see that Ash was very slowly starting to come back.
Perhaps our raven haired dear Ash could feel the gaze from both of us. Or perhaps he could feel the love from both of us. Either way, it made him feel very overwhelmed. It was much more subtle that time compared to the first. It wasn't obvious. It wasn't dramatic. It just started off as a lump in his throat and then slowly came on from there. But soon enough, his expression was crumpling. His bottom lip was quivering. His eyes were about to dampen all over again. But Misty caught on. And she put a stop to it.
"Tell me more, Ashy…" she mumbled to him as she moved her head to nuzzle against his arm and she lingered her nose there. She didn't let go of him either. But it wasn't suffocating. It was reassuring. It was comforting. She breathed out. She held onto him. She somehow knew that she had to make the most of that bit of contact. "Tell me what happened next."
The raven haired male breathed out as he heard his wife's words and felt her loving hold and like he had done before, he tried to comply. He tried to continue telling her story and for the most part, he did. But he couldn't ignore the fog that was taking over his brain after a while. You could tell from the way his words had started to gradually quicken.
"Well, the baby was born, of course. Pirate James left the room to give the family some along time together and he went off to entertain the children in other wards. The baby was in both Mermaid Misty's and Aura Guardian Ash's arms. It was the most precious thing. So joyous. And because Misty was indeed a Mermaid, all she needed was a little spray of water for her legs to turn back to fins. And because of that, she felt no pain. She was ready to head on home. Under the sea..."
"Home…" Misty replied to her husband in a contented mumble and she clung onto him even more. She smiled. She moved her head to press a kiss to his arm and that was the final straw for Ash. Because he had been supressing them, his emotions came out stronger and quicker than ever. But they weren't dark emotions. They were genuine ones. They were Ash's. He was upset.
"Stop it. No matter how hard I try and sit here and tell stories to you, they won't come true. None of them are going to come true. What happened - happened. I need to deal with that. You need to deal with that. You're better off without me. So I think it's time that I went."
Ash started crying quietly to himself in suppressed and stifling ways and he moved away from his wife. He moved away from his Misty. He forced her to un-cling from him. He sat up off the bed. And he moved away. He moved towards the door. He really intended on leaving.
I glanced at Misty fearfully. I had never felt so sick with worry in all my life. I was certain that Ash going all over again was to cause her to slip back into unconsciousness for yet another time. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut. I braced myself. I braced my ears. The machines monitoring Misty were sure to start bleeping any minute as she started to slip away from us. I was certain of it. I waited. But nothing happened.
Ash continued crying vulnerably to himself but almost as if he was still sharing the same emotions as me like we often did, he was staring through his tears at Misty with wary eyes. He was almost ducking his head. He didn't want to see her fallen asleep in front of him. And he didn't have to.
I don't have to tell you that Misty was happy to see Ash upset and about to leave because of course that wasn't the case. But like how Ash (even though it was incredibly different and no one was acting like it wasn't) had the choice of going along with the darkness or not, Misty had a choice over how she was going to act.
She had a choice. She could either break down and cry and feel even worse. Or she could accept it. Her husband was broken. Her husband was vulnerable. He needed space to heal before he could come back. She respected that. She had a choice.
She could use that time away from him by realising how strong she was with or without him and also remind herself of all the good times in their relationship. And convince others to think that way as well. And for the first time that hospital stay, she chose to do the healthier thing.
Misty lay back in bed and nodded her head. She shut her eyes and she continued nodding her head. Even though it did pain her and would of course cause her a little bit to ache in due course, she accepted what needed to happen. She breathed out. She knew what she had to do.
Seeing his wife filled with such togetherness and wholeness after their time together filled Ash with an emotion that he didn't expect that night. He didn't know exactly what it was. He didn't know what to call it. So instead, he just nodded his head back and turned towards the door. He was about to leave before he changed his mind when something stopped him. Misty stopped him. She hadn't intended to. But she needed to tell him what was in her heart.
"Be careful out there, won't you, Ashy? Take care of yourself." She told him first of all and I snuggled even further into her side right away. And for once, it didn't fill me with pain. Like how she felt, I was filled with almost a new beginning. It was like we had turned a whole new page. Ash continued stopping. Ash continued listening.
"You are wrong about one thing though. That story is real. You made it real. And you can make it as real as you want. That bit is up to you. But one bit you don't get to decide is the part of the story that is truly real. And that's the fact that Mermaid Misty and Aura Guardian Ash got through everything because of their love. The love for each other. The love for their children. The love for their families. Their families and their children's love for them. That part is real. As long as we stick together, we will be okay. And it doesn't matter if you're wherever you are and I'm here. We will stick together. We will love each other. And we will find a way out. Even you can't deny yourself that."
Ash heard Misty's words and he really heard her words. She kept her eyes shut and went to sleep after saying them but it was a natural sleep. It was a peaceful sleep. It was one because she was tired and needed rest rather than needing to shut the rest of the world out.
Ash still needed to leave the room and continue being a runaway. Part of me wished that it hadn't been like that and he had decided to stay but I soon realised that it was meant to be that way. But he had heard his wife's words. And he had absorbed his wife's words. And he showed this by giving her one last hand squeeze before he left for good for that night.
Misty's words went into her husband's ears and they made their way down to his chest. They caused his chest to ache. They caused his chest to clench. They caused his eyes to water. And they had this effect on him because they were true. He knew they were true. Even he and the darkest parts of himself couldn't deny them.
He had been filled with a new hope. It wasn't enough to come back and make everything right there and then but it was a start. It was the start of something new. It was the start of things beginning to turn around.
And things did turn around. It wasn't because of Aura Guardian Ash. It wasn't because of Mermaid Misty. It wasn't even because of Ash. And it wasn't even because of Misty. It was because of them together. It was because of them together, not separate. They were the best when they were together. And even when they weren't together, they were together.
They stuck together. They stayed in each other's minds. They stayed in each other's hearts. They stayed together even in fantasy. And this of course made them stay together in reality. Nothing could break them apart. They were even more real than Aura Guardian Ash and Mermaid Misty. They were even more true. And that is something that is very true.
The End.
There you go! Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed :3 As I've said before recently, I've been enjoying going back to the Ash aura darkness saga so much in recent weeks. It's such an important time and I love thinking about all of the different details. I loved writing this as well. Going back to Ash and Misty is always fun and even though this was a little angsty, it turned out full of hope. The idea for this has been brewing in my mind for a very long time and I finally got to sit down and tackle this moment here. It was strangely quite hard for me to write and I still don't really know why. But next weeks one is a lot lighter and I had fun with that one too! Thanks again for reading and I will be back next Wednesday with another PokeShipping themed chapter so see you then!
AmyBieberKetchum signing out :3