A. N. : This chapter is dedicated to Jeong Jeong, who I kindly invite to go fuck himself. If I see one more person call fire the element of destruction, I swear I'm going to break something. But yeah, this chapter went places, which was kind of unexpected but not unwanted.

Zuko has no idea what he's doing.

And sure that's a feeling he – well, maybe he's not quite used to it, but it's definitely not foreign to him.

He is honestly reminded of the first weeks with Lin. Though that was way worse in terms of what do I do, Uncle help me instead of laughing, what if I make a mistake –

There's less pressure here – just the fate of the world and spirits, why did he ever think that was a good idea ?

He's not even good at firebending, how is he supposed to teach it ?

The Avatar looks as lost as he is feeling, sitting on a rock and looking everywhere except at Zuko. He seems absolutely unmotivated – what, does he not want to learn firebending with a guy who's not even a master ?

Can he at least make a flame, or will they have to start with the very, very beginning ? If Zuko has to teach an Air master how to breathe, he will burn something.

Oh, so he learned things with Jeong Jeong already, good. Zuko remembers Uncle talking about his prowess out on the field – before he deserted, that is – so the Avatar at the very least saw the basics with someone who actually knows what he's doing. Great.

Less great is the absolute lack of energy in the Avatar's – in his everything really. What the hell, usually kids are excited to start bending and make flashy stuff and throw cool punches.

Zuko frowns, shows him how it's done – though that probably isn't the problem, but he has no idea what else to do so –

The fire feels different, and now that he thinks about it, it was already that way in Ba Sing Se, when he faced Azula. It feels… warmer, somehow. Which doesn't make much sense because Zuko knows the temperature of his fire, and he is sure it hasn't changed.

Still, it feels warmer.

The Avatar looks at him weirdly, asks him if there's something wrong, if he wants to stop – yeah nice try but that's not gonna do it.

Zuko can investigate the change in his fire later, so long as he can bend it's not that important. What matters right now is the moron in front of him who's supposed to save the world. Which is not going to happen anytime soon if he doesn't actually start putting some effort in this.

Spirits, he's a prodigy, what is he afraid of ? He's going to get it right after two tries and it will be infuriating, but since it's his fucking job, Zuko won't complain. So why, for the love of Agni, is he not trying ?

The Avatar stares at his feet and bites his lips, and he doesn't – doesn't want to burn anyone.

And Zuko can't help but ask who burned him, because fuck, he knows this, knows it way too well, and kid got struck by lightning, why is he even surprised – but the Avatar looks at him with confused eyes and he wasn't, no one burned, why is he asking that –

Zuko want to scream.

The Avatar isn't afraid of fire, doesn't get sick because of the smell of burned flesh, doesn't fucking recoil in front of a fire that's too close for comfort, he just – just doesn't want to burn anyone, like it makes some sort of difference whether he burns or drowns or crushes them, or even blows them from the roof and into the ground.

Like fire is somehow worse because it's fire.

And the Avatar mumbles something about control and rocks not moving on their own while fire burns everything, and he doesn't talk like usual, almost like he's repeating something he heard and –

Jeong Jeong the deserter. Emphasis on deserter.

And honestly, Zuko doesn't know if he wants to laugh or to cry, because of course the only person to teach firebending to the Avatar until now was possibly the worst person for the job. And that's counting Zuko.

He sighs. In – and out.

How do you explain to a kid who sees the world in shades of white that just because someone is a master doesn't mean he can't be wrong about – well, about a lot of things. He can even be wrong about his own element if he got fucked up enough. And spirits know you have to be fucked up by a lot of things to desert from the Fire Nation army.

Zuko has no idea what was the final straw for Jeong Jeong, but something tells him it had to do with killing and fire. With blood and murder and orphans and villages burning down until there's nothing left but ashes. The things that made Jeong Jeong are almost certainly the same that made Jet, and no one sane would ever ask Jet to teach them about fire.

Jeong Jeong may be a very competent bender, but he shouldn't teach anyone. Especially not the Avatar.

But obviously it's too late, the Avatar heard that and listened to it, and Zuko doesn't know how to make him unlearn that fire is bad because it's fire.

It's not. Just like the sea can and will try to drown you on its own, or like earth can shake and make houses crush the people living inside as they come down, fire can devour everything on its path.

But fire can also keep you warm on a stormy night, it can cook your food and turn rock into steel. Fire can make a baby laugh at how pretty it looks.

Somehow, just telling the Avatar about fire doesn't feel like enough, so Zuko grabs him by the arm and drags him to where the others are sitting, and he asks them all what they think of fire.

He has no idea why he did that, but he did, and now he looks at Jet with intent and specifies – fire, not Fire Nation. Jet doesn't look at him and keeps playing with his glass bead – and seriously, where did he get that thing ?

Toph says fire is warm and hits Sokka when he laughs. Fire keeps her feet warm and makes the world around her a bit fuzzy, but not as bad as sand.

She crosses her arms – your turn Snoozles !

Sokka makes a face and scratches his neck. Fire hardens spear tips, and the smoke is great for fish. Actually, grilling fish is also great. It leaves dark traces on the snow.

He looks over to Katara, who thinks for a second. She looks at her hands. Then at the Avatar. Fire burns – and the Avatar looks visibly upset at that – but without it the whole village would die from the cold. Telling horror stories around a firecamp is the best part of winter, and the shadows it makes on the snow and tents are mesmerizing.

Zuko nods. Not such a bad idea for something he didn't think through at all. But then everyone turns to Jet.

And he looks – he looks at them and grimaces. Frowns. Looks away and grits his teeth. Then he looks at Zuko, and at Lin, still in Katara's arms.

He makes a strangled sound, and Zuko opens his mouth to say it's fine, the lesson is done, there's no need to –

He doesn't know.

And it shouldn't be possible for a laugh to sound so horrible and broken, but still Jet manages to make these choked sounds like metal scraping against rock, and – he doesn't know, not anymore, he doesn't know anything– and he descends into hysterics, half laughing half crying, like someone opened a faucet and forgot how to close it.

And really, it's wrong, and Zuko just really wants it to stop, but he doesn't know how, he can't just shake Jet until he stops, but he can't bear that – the horrible choked laughter, and Jet curled up on the ground and broken –

Zuko doesn't know what you're supposed to do when you're on that side of the breakdown. So he just – ushers the others away and no Katara you can't stay please just go away. Sits in front of Jet in silence. Uncle would make tea, but Zuko doesn't have any and anyway he still can't manage to brew something that doesn't taste like mud.

Whatever happened to Jet today – because something obviously happened, if it wasn't clear before it is now, the old Jet would've just said something terrible and wouldn't be so torn up – whatever happened, Zuko will find out.

But first, he will wait.