5/13/23: Edited and chapter order swapped

Chapter 12
Truth Severe

The suns setting over Mos Espa cast long shadows across the courtyard of Vader's shop. Vader crouched restlessly in a dim corner, sorting parts. His mind was far away, still in shock and unable to concentrate enough to formulate coherent thoughts. Kenobi had caught up to Leia in short order and brought her back to the shop, but, justifiably distressed by the revelation of his two previous identities, she had refused to speak to either of them.

Shrill beeping interrupted his introspection.

"Artoo," he whispered in a rough voice. In all the subsequent revelations, he had forgotten about this old friend.

The silver and blue droid rocketed across the courtyard, a flood of piercing binary blistering Vader's ears. When the droid drew close enough, he planted his forward wheel and surveyed Vader with his photoreceptor. For a droid, he gave an excellent impression of disdain. His tongue-lashing drew to a close with one final virtuosic series of insults.

Vader's head sank. "Yes. You're absolutely right. I was ten different kinds of fool."

Artoo flashed an image of Padmé lying on the pavement, hair fanned out around her. Vader quailed.

"Please. Don't. I see it every night in my dreams."

A blatted denunciation dwindled into a downcast whistle. Vader risked a glance back at the droid. The holo was gone. "Thank you. No doubt I deserve every moment of anguish, but I just can't…" He swallowed heavily. "You went with Kenobi?"

Artoo shrilled in accusation.

"Yes. I see that. It's just as well you did. I went back for you. Later. But if I'd found you, Sidious would never have let me keep you."

An inquisitive note.

"Darth Sidious. Palpatine. He didn't let me keep anything from my old life—not even…"

Artoo tootled an inquiry, but before Vader could answer, Kenobi approached. Now that he had attention to spare, Vader noticed how much the man had aged. His hair had thinned and his beard had grayed. He appeared reasonably fit, though his waist was thicker than it once had been.

"Is she all right?" Vader asked hesitantly, rising to his feet.

Kenobi nodded. "Irate, of course."

"Understandable."

Kenobi waved awkwardly at Artoo. "Getting reacquainted?"

"More like getting chewed out for my incredible stupidity."

The older man said nothing very eloquently. Vader shifted restlessly, then overturned a box and sat on it. After a pause that stretched uncomfortably, Kenobi sighed. "Artoo, why don't you stay with Leia? I think she could use some company, and she's rather angry with me right now."

The droid's dome circled once before he hummed a low tone in farewell and rolled back toward Vader's quarters. Kenobi seated himself on a convenient engine block.

Silence fell, broken only by the clink of metal as Vader continued sorting parts. At length, without looking up he said, "You had Artoo….Do you know what happened to Threepio?"

"Padmé's protocol droid? He came with me too."

"Leia has never mentioned him."

"He malfunctioned several years ago. I—I haven't been able to afford to repair him. Leia begged me not to disassemble him, though…"

The conversation ground to a halt again. The shadows deepened.

Vader cleared his throat. "Did you name her?"

"No. Padmé chose her name. I did choose to include Naberrie and Skywalker. I wanted her to have some remnant of her parents." Kenobi was now fidgeting with a pair of gears, rolling them round and round against each other.

Vader struggled with his resentment for a moment, but the man had sacrificed the past eighteen years to raise Leia. He spoke haltingly. "Thank you for taking care of her. For keeping her safe. I don't necessarily appreciate that you brought her to this dustball, but—" He could not quite bring himself to finish the sentence.

"She has been a delight. I do not regret a moment of it." Kenobi paused and looked down. "I wish I had done a better job with you. I would give anything to go back and do things better."

Vader twisted farther away from him. "Don't bother with your remorse, old man. I don't want to discuss it."

Kenobi kept silent a long time. Eventually he said, "All right. If you ever change your mind…" He trailed off, then started again. "But I do need to say that I regret much that happened. It all got away from me—from us—there at the end."

Vader gave a sharp nod and continued sorting parts, odds and ends clinking and rattling as he tossed them onto piles.

Another lengthy, uncomfortable pause. Kenobi set down the gears and looked directly at Vader. "I am wondering where you want to start in taking down the Emperor."

"I'm not sure yet. I'm still trying to get over the shock. I have a daughter." He brushed aside the objection Kenobi wasn't making. "Oh, she's not actually mine of course. She's almost grown. But…I can't quite…" He trailed off, picking up a pipe and fidgeting with it.

Kenobi waited for him to continue. "You need time. There's no rush, really. I was just curious what you had in mind." He paused. Almost spoke. Hesitated.

Brusque and impatient, Vader prompted him. "What is it?"

"I may know some people who could assist. I could ask them, if you'd like."

"They're trustworthy? No security risks?" Vader finally looked at him, blue eyes sharp and demanding.

"None. I would trust them with my life."

"Who are they?"

"I prefer not to say until I know they are willing. I can send a message—tomorrow, I suppose, since it's almost evening. It may be several days before they reply, though." He brushed at some sand clinging to his hem. "On a different topic—can you recommend a safe inn for us to stay at tonight? It's far too late for us to return home."

Vader dropped his eyes to the pipe he was turning over and over in his hand. "You may stay here. In fact, it would be best if you stay at least through Boonta Eve. It's three days from now and—Well, you'll be safer here."

"Boonta Eve? Why is that special?"

"There's the pod race that day. Jabba will be traveling into town, and there are all sorts of undesirables that have come for the race and the festivals. I—would feel more comfortable about Leia's safety if you stay here."

Kenobi considered the matter. "Very well. In any event, it will give Leia time to get to know you a bit."

Vader shifted uncomfortably. "Ah, I will not be here." Resolutely, he continued gazing at the pipe twisting between his hands. "I need to go somewhere."

After a small pause, Kenobi said, "Where?"

"I'm not sure." He shot a sideways glance at Kenobi. "I just—know I need to go."

Kenobi tilted his head, studying Vader, who continued to stare at the pipe. He gave a small shrug. "I see. Well, when will you return?"

"I don't know. When I do." Vader poked the pipe absently at a pile near his feet. "The shop can remain closed while I'm gone. If a man named Kitster Banai stops in, tell him if I'm not back, he can do it without me." At Kenobi's puzzled expression, he said, "Kit will understand. Just pass the message."

Kenobi nodded, and they were quiet for a time. The silence grew heavy. Vader stared unseeingly at the courtyard. Eventually he said with an air of abstraction, "I need to construct a new lightsaber."

"A new one? Don't you have one?"

Vader gripped the pipe tightly. "No. I jettisoned it and the suit after I left the medcenter. Most satisfying shot I've ever made, destroying that suit."

"I suppose it must have been gratifying." Kenobi studied his fingers spread on his knee as he said, "You look quite—healthy. I assume you would not have worn the suit if you had not needed it."

"No," Vader replied tersely. "Though Palpatine might have required it."

"But you're free of it."

"It was another of his lies—that I could not live without it. The medical staff told me it was barely adequate—and much bulkier than necessary." The two were carefully avoiding each other's eyes. "They replaced the prosthetics, too—shorter and lighter. Apparently the ones Palpatine installed were putting stress on my bones and muscles. They were too heavy and long. He wanted his monster to be as intimidating as possible." Vader's tone was bitter on the final sentence.

Kenobi was silent again. When he spoke, his voice was almost inaudible. "I don't know what to say. It was cruel to leave you to burn."

Vader cut him off with a gesture. "I already said I don't want to discuss it. Anyway, I don't have a lightsaber, so I need to make one."

Kenobi squirmed. "Err, I do have your old one…."

"You do?" Vader's head shot around. He jerked away again. "Of course you do…" A short pause. Then, "Leia's been using it?"

"A little. It's rather big for her, truth to tell. But I don't have another crystal and…Well, I didn't want to disassemble yours. Maybe this is why." Kenobi looked up at last.

Vader shook his head. "No. I can't use that one. It—doesn't feel right. The Force is telling me I need a new one." He surged to his feet.

Kenobi followed him. "But where will you get a crystal?"

"I don't know. I suppose I'll have to look for one."

"At Ilum? The Empire blockaded it."

"Not Ilum. Somewhere else. I don't know…" He bit his lip. "Please—stay here with Leia until I get back. I hope to return by Boonta Eve."

After another lengthy examination of Vader's face, Kenobi nodded slowly. Vader pivoted with almost military precision and strode out of the courtyard.