Oh boy, Oh Boy

Chapter 28 – Bounty Hunter Bean Part 1

"Oh my goodness, Is she dead?"

"Isn't that how she always looks?"

"What about that green thing next to her? Isn't that the elf?"

"Aww, that poor dead kitty…."

"Wait, I think she's coming to…."

Bean, let out a sluggish groan as she opened her eyes. At first, her eyes met the blinding sunlight in the blue sky, and then her eyes began to adjust to the crowd of people hovered her, Elfo and Luci. "Ooooh man…my head is killing me…" She said as she rubbed her forehead. "What the hell happened?" She slowly lay's up, and her blurry vision began to focus. Bean was staring at the shocked faces of Dreamland citizens that were staring at her. She looked to the left, seeing Elfo still passed out. She then looked to the right, seeing Luci, who was also still passed out. That's when Bean began looking at her surroundings.

Bean, Elfo, and Luci were all laid out in front of a destroyed royal carriage in the middle of the Dreamland plaza. "Oooh…oh man…." She said in a worried tone. "Oh, I'm so dead…." Elfo and Luci were now beginning to wake up. Elfo lets out a yawn and then looks at everyone. "Hi everyone! Ow, my head!" He then looks at the broken carriage. "Oh man, what a crazy night we had!" Luci laughed. "Nice job on the carriage leap, Bean! You weren't kidding when you said you drive better when you're drunk!"

The trio and the crowd of people heard clanking footsteps coming their way. It was the knight's of Dreamland, followed by an angry-looking older woman. "There they are! Those are the ruffians that stole my carriage when I was still in it!" said Lady Lingonberry, pointing at the three. Bean, Elfo, and Luci gasped, then Bean said, "Come on, guys it's time to book it!" She said hastily as the trio quickly got to their feet and were about to run but were surrounded by more knights that appeared. "Ah crap…" said Bean as she slumped.

"Oh wow, we're screwed!" said Elfo with a laugh.

Bean, Elfo, and Luci were all escorted back to the castle and were taken straight into the throne room where her father, King Zog of Dreamland, stood with his fist against his lips, baring his usual angry expression. "Well, what do we have here?" He said as he stepped away from his throne and got closer to Bean. "The spoiled, ungrateful brat who decides to leave her princess duties to go out and get drunk with her two weird little friends!"

Bean rolled her eyes. "Daddy, please, I'm sorry ok? We drank way too much, and we got carried away. It won't happen again, and I'm going to cut back on drinking!"

"You're drinking right now!" said Zog, pointing to Bean's right hand, which had a Beer mug.

Bean looked to her right. "Where did that come from?" She asked. Luci would then say, "You're welcome!" with a smirk across his face. Bean would shrug and chug the mug whole, which further angered her father.

"What in the hell am I going to do with you, Bean? You go out and cause trouble. Why can't you be like your older brother and start taking your duties as royalty seriously!"

"And be a pretentious dick like him? Yeah, no thanks," said Bean, "I'm going to go inside and get a hot emerald message." Bean walked past her father, but Zog grabbed Bean by her arm, stopping her.

"Oh no, you don't, wise guy!" said Zog, "You aren't going anywhere because I am banishing you from this castle! You're a good-for-nothing, and you're going for nothing! And you aren't returning to this castle till you appreciate all the money I poured into you!"

"FINE!" Bean yelled. "I don't need you! I don't need ANYBODY!" She screamed at the top of her lungs before she marched off. Elfo and Luci follow close behind.

Bean would march down the stone road while ranting the whole time. "What the hell does he know? I don't need his help! I can make it fine on my own!" She said while kicking a stone rock that was in her way.

"Spoken like a true homeless teenager!" said Luci.

Bean would then shoot a glare at Luci, causing Luci to chuckle at Bean. The trio would then go to the Bar, where Bean would order a few drinks. Bean would continue to rant about Zog. "What does Zog know anyway?" She said as she took a big chug out of her beer. "I'm probably good at a lot of things. I probably don't know it yet!" A smile would then appear across her face. "This isn't so so bad. No, no, no, this is great! This is an opportunity to start fresh!" She said happily, as she finished her first mug of beer. Suddenly the doors of the Bar were kicked open, making everyone look towards the entrance. Koga stepped through, carrying a man over his right shoulder.

The bar owner sighed. "Do you have to kick open the doors every time?"

"I gotta make a dramatic entrance!" said Koga, as he dropped the man to the floor with a thud. Koga would sit down and then say, "Give me the usual."

The bar owner would roll his eyes and reply, "Let me guess, a water?"

"You know it,"

"When are you ever going to order an actual drink?"

"Just give me the water already!"

"Can I get a drink too?" asked the tied-up man.

"Shut up!" said Koga.

The bartender would shrug, pour a glass of water, and slide it to him. Koga would take the glass and chug it with one gulp. "Ahh…good ol cold water!"

"Hey, Koga!" said Elfo, waving over at him.

Koga turns around and sees Bean, Elfo, and Luci approaching him. "Sup, dorks! What are you stooges up to?"

"We're watching Bean rant and drown her sorrows in Alcohol because she got banished from the castle!" said Elfo, with his big happy grin.

"What?" Koga said, looking from Elfo and then up to Bean. Koga would start laughing while smacking his knee. "Oh my god, that is hilarious! What princess gets kicked out of her Kingdom? Man, oh man, Bean, you're a tragedy!"

"Oh, shut up!" Bean said, annoyed, as she crossed her arms. She then stared down at the man Koga had tied up. "What, did you catch another sweetroll thief or something?"

"Nope, this is not a part of the usual knight jobs. This guy is my bounty catch for the week!" said Koga, grinning at the tied-up man.

Bean raised a brow. "Bounty hunting?"

Luci hops onto Bean's shoulder. "It's a job where you go and hunt down other people and get paid for it," He explained.

"Dead or alive," Koga added in. "Mainly dead, depending on how much trouble they gave me."

"But doesn't Zog pay you for working in the castle?" Elfo asked.

"Yeah, because being paid one gold Zog is supposed to do anything," said Koga

"So you're technically working two jobs?" Elfo asked.

"I guess," Koga said with a shrug.

"Wait a minute..." said Bean, her eyes widening slightly. "Oh my god, a job! That's what people do all day!"

"You wanna get a job? Where are you going to work?" asked Luci. "Most importantly, how will you keep it?

"I don't know if I don't try! I'm sure if I try something, It'll stick!" Bean said optimistically

"You wanna bounty with me?" Koga asked her.

"Me? Bounty hunt? That wasn't my first job choice, but I don't know," said Bean, rubbing her left arm, unsure. "I mean, you always say that my sword fighting skills are subpar and not up to snuff with yours sooo…"

"They are!" Koga nods as he tosses the tied-up man over his shoulder. "That's why I'm going to take this opportunity to teach you how not to suck!"

"Oh, thank you so much Koga…" said Bean rolling her eyes

…

"Wait…there's a place where we can turn them in?" said Bean, as she looked at the large wooden building in front of them. "YUP!" Koga replied as he kicked open the doors to the building. The trio stepped into the building and saw an older woman with dirty blond hair and a brown and black dress standing behind the counter. "Koga stopped kicking the goddamn door open all the time!" She spat.

"Hello, Debra!" said Koga happily as he plopped the bounty catch onto the counter. "Caught this dumbass right here!"

Debra looked at the man, surprised. "Wow, this one doesn't have his head cut off. I guess he didn't give you too much trouble?"

"Eh, I felt like being nice today," Koga replied with a shrug.

Debra then looked at the trio Of Bean, Elfo, and Luci. "Oh, Princess Tiabeanie, I see you're sober this time and not puking all over the room." Bean looked at Debra, confused. "Wait, I've been in here before?" She asked. Debra nods. "Yeah, you stumbled in here asking for a bathroom and then threw your guts up." Bean blinked a few times. "I don't remember any of that…" Debra shrugs. "Not surprising. Anyways," Debra reached under the counter and grabbed the bag of gold, handing it to Koga. "So what brings you three in here?"

"Bean's going to be bounty hunting with me!" said Koga as he pocketed the gold.

Debra raises a brow. "Oh. Is that right?"

"Yeah, freckles over here got kicked out of her kingdom, and she's homeless now."

Debra snorts. "Well, how unfortunate for you! You picked the right man to help you!"

"Hey Debra, you still got that old armor in the back?" Koga asked.

"OH! I DO! Be right back!" said Debra as she hurried to the back.

"Armor? I don't really need that do i? I've always done well without it," said Bean.

"Yes, you're going to wear armor. You're not walking around wearing nothing but a blue shirt and tacky brown pats while we go bounty hunting!" Koga stated.

"Tacky?" said Bean looking down at her brown pants.

"Yeah, those pants look meh on you," Luci chimed in.

Debra would return. She stepped around the counter and placed the armor on the table. "Here you go, princess! Try it on!"

Bean examines the armor a bit before taking it and placing it on. It was leather armor. Its base color was brown, with blue straps around the waist and arms. "Wow…this isn't bad!" She said as she looked at herself. "Bounty hunter Bean is ready to go!" She said excitedly. "Alright, so who's our first target?"

Koga walks over to the wall that has some bounty posters on it. Koga snags a wanted poster and shows it off to Bean. "Let's go after this guy! Someone with a smaller bounty shouldn't be too much for you!"

"Sounds good to me! NOW LET'S ROLL!"

And so, Bean would start her first day as a bounty hunter.