Chapter 4

Sophia POV

There was an insistent buzzing under my pillow that made my entire head vibrate, forcing me out of my peaceful sleep. I slowly blinked my eyes open as I woke up, squinting as the morning sun hit them perfectly. My limbs stretched and reached as far as they would go before I decided to roll over and finally get up. Mornings were silent affairs for me, I'd creep around my house trying to make as little noise possible, hence the morning alarm put on vibrator mode, and leave before my mother even had a chance to notice me.

My hands did all of the work as I ran on autopilot, dressing in my usual style: black, brushing my teeth, and sitting back down in my bed to brush my long hair. I'd thought about cutting it more than once, but Henrietta encouraged me to keep it long for the aesthetic; something about it making me look mysterious or like the Grudge? I can't really remember but I don't have plans to cut it anytime soon. I combed down my bangs and sighed as I tied on my black sneakers, frowning as I noticed how worn out they were starting to look. Looks like I'll have to save up to buy some new shoes soon... I picked up my backpack and pulled it on as I walked to the kitchen, heating up some water over the stove and preparing a travel mug that I could take with me.

"Two spoons of coffee, three spoons of sugar..." I muttered to myself as stirred around the sugar and instant coffee mix. Once the water was steaming with little air bubbles at the bottom, I turned off the stove and poured some into my mug. The spoon stirred around my coffee until I was sure the grains at the bottom were fully dissolved. Putting the lid on the mug and grabbing a granola bar, I made my way to the front door, closing it silently behind me and locking it. I walked out of my house with a cup of coffee in hand and grabbed my bike before slowly walking to school.

It was really early, school wouldn't be starting for another hour or so but I couldn't stand being in my house any longer so I left before my mom even woke up. The crisp morning air was cold against my cheeks so I pulled the hood of my hoodie up and closer to my face. I didn't feel like riding my bike yet so I pulled it along by the handle bar as my legs warmed up. My days usually consisted of me leaving the house before my mother woke up, going to school, and going to work. I was able to get early dismissal by opting out of taking electives and replacing them extra core classes while also taking classes during summer school. By no standards was I an over achiever, I just wanted to be done with my education as soon as possible, one of the perks being the option of early dismissal since I've been getting so many classes out of the way. That's how I was able to maintain a job during the week which helped buy stuff that my mom wouldn't give me money for.

"Hello Kenneth." I said softly as I came closer to the train tracks, a boy in an orange parka was coming out of his house just as early.

"Hey." He muffled a greeting as he fell into step with me. I've known Kenneth since I moved here. My mom has been raising me on her own for a while so we couldn't afford to live in the nicer part of town across the train tracks. After the first few nights and a random encounter, we realized we had a lot in common that not many others in our social groups do. We're not exactly friends, I would say, since we never hang out, more like confidants - he scratches my back and I scratch his. I think he's more relieved than anything to have a girl around that Karen can run to for female troubles or general girl advice, even if I'm not so good with that. Speaking of the brunette, she doesn't seem to be around this morning.

"Where's Karen?" It wasn't rare to see him walking hand-in-hand with his little sister. She was a pretty cute kid, just really shy, nice as hell though. I'm pretty sure Henrietta has a soft spot for her too.

"She slept over at a friend's house and is getting a ride to school." I nodded and sipped my coffee as we walked for a few more yards before he seemed to have suddenly gotten an idea. "Hey! You're one of the goth kids!" I raised an eyebrow, not that he could see.

"Yeah, I thought you knew that already." Another sip of my coffee and he shook his head.

"No, I think you could help me and my friends." He started walking a little faster and took out his phone. He called two numbers and told them hurriedly to meet him at the bus stop, keeping it short before hanging up.

"Help with what?"

"We think one of our friends is turning goth." He was fidgeting anxiously as he led me to the bus stop where he usually waited to be taken to school. "We're worried about him since this isn't how he usually acts."

"Oh?" I stood next to him and sipped on my warm coffee, glad that it had cooled down enough to be drank comfortably.

"They should be here any second." He fidgeted and I sighed as I leaned my bike against the pole with the bus stop sign. We waited in silence and neither of us bothered trying to fill it with awkward small talk. The comfortable silence ended all too soon as whiny voice called out.

"Oh God Kenny, don't tell me you started fucking goth girls." I turned and saw a fat boy who had his breakfast in his hand and was scowling at me as if I had personally offended him. Kenneth visibly rolled his eyes.

"No asshole. Just hold on so I don't have to explain everything twice."

"Ugh fine, but it'd better be good, I didn't get to bring all my breakfast with me." He stood next to Kenneth and ate his breakfast in silence, except for his loud breathing.

"What's this about, Kenny?" A boy wearing a green hat yawned as he walked toward us from roughly the same direction, blinking a little confused as he saw me. "Oh, hello." He said a little awkwardly and I gave a small wave in return as I took another sip of my coffee.

"Spill it poor boy." The fat one spoke up as he finished his breakfast, receiving a glare from inside the orange parka.

"Fuck off. This is Sophia, she's my neighbor-"

"Ew! Goth and poor! What else could be wrong with you, you got AIDS or something?" Fat One yelled out and I glared, already not liking him.

"Shut up conformist, I'd rather be goth and poor than have a heart attack at nineteen." I crossed my arms and he glared.

"Ey! Im not fat, I'm buff!" Apparently someone doesn't know that you're not supposed to talk with your mouth full.

"Keep lying to yourself, aren't you aware that pig lard isn't on the food pyramid?" I scoffed and he took a step closer to me threateningly. I might have been scared if I wasn't so disgusted at seeing the chewed up food inside his mouth.

"Listen bitch-"

"Shut the fuck up and focus you asshole, this is about Stan! Finish what you were saying Kenny." The boy in the green hat glared at the fat one.

"As I was saying, this is Sophia and I think she can help us with Stan."

"How can she help?" Green Hat tilted his head.

"Well, she's a goth but she's pretty cool. Since she's on 'the inside' she can convince Stan that he's not really a goth and he'll go back to normal." Kenneth crossed his arms proudly and the other two thought it over.

"Yeah, that could work!" Green Hat smiled to me as I finished the rest of my coffee. "You just need to talk to Stan for us, he'll listen to you." That's fine and all, but I have no idea who they're talking about...

"Um, who's Stan?" I spoke up softly and they furrowed their eyebrows.

"I could have sworn he would have gone to you guys by now for sure." Kenneth tilted his head and scratched his cheek.

"He has black hair, dark blue eyes, and a hat with a puff ball on it, he's sad because his girlfriend broke up with him." Green Hat described and a lightbulb went off in my head as I thought of our new member.

"Oh, you mean Raven?" I kicked some snow and he nodded as Fat One scoffed.

"What a gay little name, did he pick it out himself?" He seems to enjoy being an asshole, I guess.

"No, that's what the others call him." I rolled my eyes, not that they could see.

"Yeah, I remember them calling him that last time." Green Hat nodded. "So how is he?" He asked concerned and I could instantly tell that him and Raven must be pretty close, his worry is enough to prove that. I'm sure he must be close with Kenneth and the fat one too, but they don't compare to green hat. Most likely the best friend.

"I haven't had a chance to spend much time with him, but he seems pretty tormented on the inside." I shrugged and looked away. "I can tell he's not truly dedicated to being goth, just depressed. From what I've seen, he's trying too hard to fit in with us." They nodded at each other.

"Alright, Sophia was it? We need you to talk some sense into our friend for us, he'll listen to you since you're on equal standing in his eyes. The last time this happened he kept calling us conformists and ignoring us." Green Hat said with a small edge of desperation in his voice and I sighed.

"I don't think that would really work, I don't think you guys understand what it means to be goth." I put my hands in my pockets and leaned against my bike.

"What do you mean? You just wear black and act like you're better than everyone else while at the same time being full of shit and crying about how the world sucks." Fat One rolled his eyes and I sighed.

"Being goth is about finding the beauty in things that others normally wouldn't. Sure, we all seem to dress the same and there are a bunch of posers who think being goth is more of a fashion statement, but that's not the point. When you're goth you stick together. We all have different reasons for being goth, perhaps trauma, sadness, or we were simply born with those ideals and views, but I'm no one to tell someone to stop being goth just because they aren't 'doing it right', that's something a conformist would do." I said softly as I grabbed my bike.

"But you just said Stan isn't really goth!" Green Hat yelled frustrated as I swung a leg over my bike seat.

"He's not, but I can tell he's in pain and wants some sort of comfort, even if it means pretending to be something he's not for a little while. He may not be 'truly' goth, but he takes comfort in the darkness the same way we do, he doesn't want to deal with a bunch of conformists wannabes just like we don't. The others accepted him pretty easily, so I see no reason not to. If what you all say is true then he'll just get bored of us and go back to you, just be patient while his inner self has time to recover from what that girl did to him." I started pedaling and could hear green hat sigh frustrated behind me.

"Much help you were, you faggy bitch!" I could hear the fat one yell and rolled my eyes as I made my way to school. It was probably going to be a long day and I didn't want to deal with stupid teachers hounding me for being late. Once I got there, I chained my bike to the front and made sure the lock was properly in place. There weren't many thieves around here, but people are sometimes cruel just for the fun of it. I slowly made my way to the front doors and through the halls, stopping only at my locker to leave my clean uniform and a few other things that I could pick up again after school.

My locker wasn't overly crowded or decorated like I'd seen other girls', just a few packets of instant coffee and sugar here and there for when I really needed a cup during school, and a small whiteboard I bought at a thrift store that I wrote little reminders on. The little whiteboard was duck-taped to the back of the locker and had a dry erase marker hanging by a string next to it. There was nothing written on it today so it's safe to assume I didn't forget anything, hopefully. I left my travel mug next to a binder and made sure I wasn't forgetting anything that I'd need for today's classes. It was so annoying to have to come running back here every hour just because I was missing one thing or the other... Once I was done with that, I shut the metal door and once again checked that the lock was properly shut in place.

Opening my granola bar, I took a loud bite out of it and chewed slowly as I made my way to my first class. My friends weren't in any of my classes, not that I would have seen them if they were since they ditch so much anyways. Henrietta, Michael, and I were all in eleventh grade, Pete was in tenth and I'm pretty sure that Raven was the same grade as him. Of course, Firkle was still in the middle school part of campus, but he'll be able to join us in high school next year. The seat next to me stayed empty, the way it's been since the beginning of the school year, and every year actually. My gothic appearance was enough to push others away and I was okay with that I guess, moving around so much when I was younger made me sort of an introvert, but that was perfect for the crowd of friends I was currently a part of.

My classes passed by at a snail's pace and when lunch rolled around I went to my locker to grab my things. Maybe if I was quick enough, I'd have time for a quick smoke with-

"Sophia?" I turned around and saw a group of guys around me. There were the four from this morning plus two other ones, a kid with soft-looking blond hair that I couldn't help but notice had a scar over his left eye, and a brown haired kid using crutches. A sigh spilled out of my lips as I finished packing up my backpack.

"Yes?" I asked softly.

"W-w-we hear that Stan is friends with the guh-goths again." The one in crutches stuttered and I nodded slowly.

"Yes, I suppose that's true." I leaned back against my locker and the soft blond rubbed his knuckles together, a nervous habit I suppose.

"Oh hamburgers, poor Stan. He must be feeling pretty awful to go back to you guys." He frowned and I scratched the back of my head.

"I'm not sure what you expect me to do about it?" Green Hat crossed his arms.

"We just want you to talk to him."

"What makes you think that'd he'd listen to me, we don't even really know each other." I frowned and adjusted the straps of my backpack.

"We j-just need you to t-t-tuh-talk some sense into him." Crutches spoke up with a smile and I rubbed my arm. They were all staring at me expectantly.

"Come on Sophia, we don't expect you to change his mind." Kenneth said softly and raised his eyebrows a little. My fingers reached up and pinched the bridge of my nose.

"I promise nothing." I started slowly, opening my locker again. "And I'm not going to try to convince him of anything, but I might mention you guys and see what he says, that way you guys will know what to do in terms of being his friends." Green Hat seemed a little frustrated but Kenneth's eyes sparkled.

"Thanks Sophia." They all thanked me and walked away as I shut my locker door. I walked in the opposite direction to grab my bike and headed off to work.

Talk to Raven

"That whiteboard never stays clean for long." I muttered to myself.