Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of the witcher. Those are property of Mr Sapkowski and I using Netflix series canon mixed with the books and my twisted version of the lore.

Warnings : Blood. Burns. Discussions of sexual matters. Self-loathing. Dark past and bad coping mechanisms.

Notes :

The parts in italic are inner thoughts or memories.

I had to cut the chapter in two because it was too long. And I wanted to separate the fight from the rest. Enjoy !

Passiflora - Part 2

Weakness

###

From the shadows came a tall man. Black outfit, white hair, golden eyes, and a crooked smile on his face. Geralt was facing a perfect twin and he definitely wanted to fight.

He had anticipated that and it was the reason why he wanted everyone out of this. If the others would have been with him, the creature would have too many thoughts to play with and make the hunt a very traumatic event for everyone. Just with him, there were not many options. And copying him was the logical one. On the other hand, what disturbed Geralt was the will to fight. What a strange behavior for a Doppler, he thought.

- "Why are you here, in Novigrad ?" He asked.

- "As if I had a real choice." His double tilted his head. "Human world is almost the only world that exists now. You don't have much either, monster."

Geralt knew from the start that the Doppler would use his memories and feelings against him but somehow it worked better than he thought. He had to mute that very self depressive little voice in him to respond to his adversary.

- "I can understand that the loss of your bogs pushed you to extreme measures, even if you being in a city is very uncommon, but I don't get what you are doing with those purchases, taking the life of an honest gnome."

- "Dainty is a brilliant man with a mathematical brain for when it comes to affairs but a mushroom soup bowl in its place when it comes to actually using it to get a better life."

- "Having a life you like can be the better life."

- "I agree and Dainty doesn't like to breed horses even if he is very savy on that matter. This is a family heritage he had to take and follow by tradition. He needs a better life so I need a better life. I take what I can. He is a collateral damage as much as I am of the expansion of Novigrad."

Geralt squinted his eyes. This made no sense. The Doppler was clutching to something that didn't belong to him. Or did he plan on killing Dainty to take his place for good in the end ?

- "If you are planning actions against my client I would have to take your life, Doppler."

There was a strange expression on his double. He didn't seem sure but at the same time resolute to go to the end of it. Geralt could guess that the creature didn't see any other way to survive. He was going to play it all, even if it meant die… The witcher was having this uncomfortable hitch. This time there would be blood.

He pulled his silver sword out. His double did the same. They circled around. Each step Geralt made matched exactly the same from his ganger. He went for a quick attack that was totally blocked, to his surprise.

- "I am you, witcher. Your mutant super strength and super reflexes won't work on me. I know what you know. I can read your body language. You can't surprise me."

Geralt grunted. This was a trick. The copy couldn't be as good as the original. He attacked again. This was a longer combo, pressing on the balance points of the enemy. But then again the Doppler matched. He even managed to touch him on a mistake he made and Geralt lost his balance for a moment. His hat fell to the ground near some barrels. His defense was opened for a second but the Doppler didn't try to take him down. So he pressed again. Nothing. They were at the same level. The double smiled.

- "What did you think, witcher ? To have an easy fight against a poor Doppler." He was taunting him. "How do you feel ? Fighting against yourself ?"

Geralt attacked again. Trying to find the weakness in his own defense. But he couldn't pass himself. Every move, as fast as they were, was anticipated and blocked. This was humiliating when his adversary could just a few minutes ago. The Doppler had his knowledge and his strength apparently. He was reacting as he would do, even better.

Their sword dance led them to a metal stair and a platform passing above the crates, almost reaching the roof and the metal structure supporting the whole storage space.

He was about to charge again when he saw the immediate response of the creature reading his body language. He was preparing the perfect counter to his move. That was then the realisation hit him. This was not very different as the natural way Dopplers acted in nature. Defense mechanisms only. That was the reason why he didn't try to take advantage of his weakness when he could before.

Geralt understood that the doppler could fake being him but hadn't the same violence in him when need be and he was acting his will to kill. He was bluffing his way through this mess. This was the only thing that he needed to find the crack in his own defense. The next moves, he let his adversary take the advantage in the fight and at the last second returned his strength against him with an unmatched brutality. He was not using the efficient but almost dancing moves of the witcher sword art but only the sheer force of his body. There was nothing to read but incoming death in his moves.

He cornered the Doppler near the stairs they took before and he pushed him hard. His double fell, rolling down to the ground, hitting hard the metal steps in his descent. Geralt jumped from the upper stage directly to the bottom in a swift move over the ledge. His mutant body was made for these kinds of extreme shocks and tensions. He might be sore a few days but he would have no damage from the impact. His double struggled to get back on his feet. Geralt's sword found its way to his throat.

- "Game is over, Doppler." He said. It was strange to see fear in his own eyes. The fear to die. "I am not blindly killing monsters, you know, but you are a danger to this city and its citizens. Playing with the life of others you could push the Eternal Flame to kill innocent people as heresies."

- "I just wanna live…"

- "I know, but you won't."

The fearful Doppler morphed suddenly and smiled as Geralt's hand shook. He was now the perfect replica of Jaskier.

- "I see in your mind, witcher. Even if you know what I am, you cannot hurt him, am I right ? You really think you don't have feelings, don't you ? So why are you hesitating ?" The usually soft gray eyes of his friend were piercing. "Oh I see ! You love him..."

- "Shut up !"

- "Why do you want to ignore that ? This is beautiful and this is yours, witcher."

- "I cannot… love. Witcher's don't love."

There was nothing truer than that for Geralt but the doppler was right on one point. He was looking at an image of his young friend and he couldn't move, even if he knew what was in front of him in reality. Visualizing the next move, his muscles didn't respond. In his mind flashed old dreams. The white wolf biting the hand that tried to touch him. His friend badly hurt in a glade.

- "You are going to kill me anyway." Said the Doppler with his voice, echoing these distant evanescences of his mind. "Witchers live alone. That's the best way that is. Witchers are death machines. Accepting me by your side was a mistake. No humans on hunts." He enumerated thoughts he had deep down and believed. Things that he responded sometimes, almost like a machine, to justify his difference when asked. " Why did you let me come ? What changed ? You are lying to yourself because you found something precious. You are clutching to that and yet refuse to see... You need me. You're finding justifications to keep me, even if you know that this is not a life for me. Because you could have got me killed or… have killed me yourself in your beast rage. Monster !"

Geralt was beginning to breathe hard. He had to move. He had to kill but imagining his own sword taking the life of Jaskier was terrifying. The Doppler was right except for love. This couldn't be it.

When he was with Jaskier, there were a lot of emotions going through his mind. Many negative ones if he thought about his pure witcher life - he had changed things that shouldn't - but the counterpart was happiness, comfort, plenitude. And the other thing. The thing that was currently holding his hand back. The feeling with no name. The soft spot. His weakness. The strange feeling of emptiness when he imagined losing him. The pain in his heart that bloomed into a million things when they met again after the winter. The unexplainable soothing sensation when he was around. The strange sensation when he genuinely smiled at him. Was it love ? No...

- "This is not an unnamed feeling. You just don't accept it as part of you. And you refuse the bare definition."

- "I am a mutant. I don't feel what you are implying. This is something else. I don't have any attraction. You are just trying to manipulate me. That's what Dopplers do."

- "You are an idiot, buddy." The false Jaskier smiled and it was too close to the original.

He let out a shuddering breath. Why was he affected by that ? The Doppler got up slowly. Geralt's silver sword was pressing against its throat. The monster grunted as it burned its skin but it didn't stop him. On the contrary, he took the blade with his right hand. The skin smoked as the silver was burning him. He morphed into the version of Jaskier from the dream where he was hurt. Bruises darkened his skin in places. Cuts opened on his face, blood rushing suddenly from it and his mouth as he spoke.

- "You know the funny part is that when I become someone, I borrow memories and emotions. I just need a fraction to get what I need. A few hours, when we met in the market, was all I needed. I see who you are. And that boy - that you secretly picture as your sunshine but refuse to see the feelings you have for him - is so full of pain, very much like you. He just knows how to mute this as long as he can find happiness in the present. As much as you hide who you are to the world behind your inexpressiveness and the mutant factor. And he finds his happiness with you… You didn't push to know why he was in Oxenfurt, didn't you ? Because you saw his pain coming to the surface. You don't like it, seeing him sad and hurt, don't you ?"

Blood was dripping from his lips to his shirt. Not he didn't like it at all. This vision itself was like a punch in the guts.

- "Shut up…" How witchers used to hunt and kill Dopplers in the past with them messing up with their mind like that ? Maybe his human friend was his weakness.

- "He is not human. So kill him. Like you would kill any monsters. Kill me…"

- "What ?! You are lying." Geralt was disturbed by this statement.

- "I am not. He may be biologically human but he is not by other means." The Doppler as Jaskier closed his eyes. "A micro country with its own laws. A man of great influence. An evil contact put on the head of an unborn child." He opened his eyes again and seemed sad. "He is not human, in an even more twisted way than me trying to emulate a perfect citizen here will ever be. Poor little Julian. Forced to exist a denied existence before he was even born."

- "Shut up !" Screamed Geralt. He didn't want to know things Jaskier never wished to share.

The smell of burned flesh was hard to ignore now. Jaskier's mimic pushed the sword away - he didn't resist - and he closed the distance between them. In decades of hunts, Geralt never felt that lost and disturbed by a monster. He knew what to expect from a Doppler but they were so rare that he never had to fight them before and what was said about their abilities was far from the truth. They were creating an evil trap for the mind, nested in memories and hidden emotions.

- "You are both deeply tortured children. So much pain from your past in both of you. That's why you are so well together. You need each other to heal. But you are both doing things so wrong…"

- "I don't… witchers don't…" Why was he weak to that ?

- "Love… oh yes they do." Completed the Doppler as he was taking back the current appearance of Jaskier.

He was just a foot away. He leaned forward in a clear attempt to kiss him. Geralt moved backward just before the contact. His lips brushed his. For the fraction it lasted, he felt something he never experienced before. A surge, like an electric impulse, waking dormant parts of him. His whole being screamed love but he refused. Witchers cannot love. The mutation destroyed everything. At best this was the remains of genetic embedded behaviors. A reptilian reflex buried deep into human genetics. His brothers could feel arousal but they confirmed to him that they didn't love. So this was just that. The sudden acknowledgement of his heritage.

He discovered his mirroring pleasure response with Jaskier actually. The man was his total opposite for those things. In his former experiences in brothels, everything was bland. His body was responding to some of the stimulus but he had no real pleasure and he could tell the woman was always faking. Unlike his brothers, sexual attraction and flesh pleasure were out of his reach. But the first time he went to a brothel with Jaskier, this was a totally new thing. He was on another bed with his partner, at the other side of the room and it enhanced his own union somehow. This was the first time he felt aroused and had real pleasure in the act, not just a physical response.

They talked about it later. Jaskier was very open about those subjects and never saw his lack of libido as a problematic thing overall. That day, Geralt exposed his theory and his friend grinned and said : "you are so unromantic, buddy." But he had his own theory.

- "Some could say I fall in love like I breathe but this is not totally true. I am just attracted and I find a lot of pleasure in discovering people. Sex is the physical counterpart of that for me. When things go well… well.. I don't have to draw you the picture. The thing is, with some special people, the link is different and I feel a very strong bond that goes beyond all of that. And then sex makes for a whole new experience. This is very rare and I can't explain what is the trigger but I know the difference. Maybe you need some special triggers of your own to have a full experience too."

- "And a trigger would be you having sex in the same room as me. This is weird as fuck. I am telling you, there is no such thing in me."

- "Love is a spectrum, buddy. It doesn't have to be romantic or sexual. Parents loving their child is love. Strong friendship is love. It doesn't mean that because you don't feel it the same way as me that it is totally absent. I had some experience in the latter… but I tell you, you have something in you. Just different."

- "Bullshit. Like you could see that in others ?" He laughed. Jaskier pouted.

- "Well, you are a witcher with enhanced senses. You could smell my fart two streets away. Why can't you believe I am a human with enhanced empathy ? I can feel those kinds of things in people. Maybe there is a mirroring thing implied in your experience indeed, but I am telling you, what you are describing to me has nothing to do with only a mechanical and chemical response of your body. You can feel and you have a great variety of emotions, even love. You have to find your ways if you want to explore that."

- "This is stupid. I don't care about that. I am glad I am the way I am when I see the emotional wreckage you are when your lovers hurt your feelings. I am in a more comfortable place."

- "Well, that is another debate…"

The face Jaskier made that day was unreadable and Geralt didn't understand.

Maybe he did now...

Everything stopped instantly as the door of the warehouse banged open in a sudden deafening sound of metal. Was it someone or the wind he couldn't tell yet. Taking advantage of his confusion, the Doppler tried to run away but Geralt came back to himself just in time.

- "Yrden !" He mouthed, forming the sign and touching the ground as he kneeled at the same time. The whole surface around them, in a loose circle, glowed in blue as the chaos responded to his command. "You are not going anywhere. This is the time we settle this." He growled watching the Doppler losing his body coherence.

Soon what he was facing was a short indistinct humanoid form with gray complexion and a weird slick face. It had no nose, no lips, no expression and its eyes were just two big black marbles with a gray circle marking the iris. The only marks on its body were the burns from the sword on its neck and hand, but they were already began to fade.

Yrden was a matter and energy separative and rearranging sign spell. The hardest to master. Very efficient on cross-spheres creatures or to temporarily seal a zone. Nothing could cross the chosen space from this reality or another. The effect it had on his prey helped Geralt to focus. He switched his mind to analytical mode to get as much information as he could.

Did Vesemir know about that ? Did he fight one before ? Geralt knew nothing about them except what he had leant during his formation : common behavior and habitat - the things he said to Dainty and Jaskier. But the fact was that he had been truly underprepared to face one. There was so much to learn. His brain was hopefully running fast other gears than those implying his inner struggles.

The fact that the Doppler lost his ability to morph meant a lot about energy and spheres. The morphing was a complex and fascinating evolution. Several multidimensional creatures had been trapped on the Continent in a fluctuating state after the Conjunction. Usually they had no tangible form, like specters and djinns. Dopplers were then more complex beings than what it seemed.

Why didn't i think of that move first ? He thought. Yrden seemed almost too obvious now.

- "Because you hate yourself so much that you wouldn't do anything else than try to kill yourself at sight… You are the monster that kills monsters so..." Came the answer from the Doppler staring at him with its strange eyes. It was reading his surface feelings with an uncanny accuracy. Geralt focused again on the analysis.

Its psychic powers were not affected by the Yrden seal. Then that was from its entity and it had nothing to do with chaos.

Their staring contest was interrupted by a voice coming from the exit. It was too early to be Jaskier and Dainty. Geralt recognised the voice, asking where the gnome was. It was Chapelle. And by the sound of feet approaching, he wasn't alone. Geralt knew it meant troubles. Big troubles. The Eternal Flame cult being that obviously wronged by the existence of this situation alone was a straight path to death for both of them if they got caught.

- "Release the spell, witcher, and work this out together." The Doppler whispered urgently. "I can't escape. We need to pretend…"

There were far into the storage place but the inquisitors wouldn't take long to find them. Geralt hesitated a few seconds but did as told. He had no choice in reality. The Doppler was right. They needed to pretend. As soon as he released the Yrden sign, the creature morphed into Dainty. Himself just had the time to put back his sword on his back, a second later, Chapelle appeared with several guards of the Eternal Flame, in their white and gray official outfits.

- "Witcher ? What a surprise to see you there. Are witchers interested in commerce currently ?" He asked with a very not hidden suspicious inflection and a clear mocking tone.

- "I am more surprised to see you, Sir Chapelle." He replied.

- "The door wasn't locked. I feared for the precious acquisitions of Sir Biberveldt. That's why I asked the guards to follow me. You can be sure the safety of our citizens is our first concern."

- "And I am very touched by this nice attention." Said Dainty nervously, as convincingly as the original.

- "I am very interested in all those purchases you made those few last weeks. This is very strange to choose to sell your horses for…" Chapelle looked at some barrels. "... inflammable materials and powders."

The accusation was audible even in the silence.

- "Oh don't worry, this is not to make offensive things. The sole purpose of that is…"

- "To make the combustible for the Eternal Flame altars."

Geralt looked at the Doppler surprised. It was a genius and a total idiot. It was making Dainty rich in the most twisted way. The problem Chapelle had had nothing to do with the potential doubles even if he seemed uite suspicious about it. It was mostly an economic one. Becoming the only reseller of all those products was a strategic move. Dainty would have substantial guaranteed incomes if he could find the perfect producer of the final product.

His blood ran cold. He suddenly heard Jaskier's voice coming from afar, speaking loudly with the real Dainty. They were quite early too. What happened on their side ?

- "We may have a problem there." He said before the others noticed the new people coming. They were checkmat.

When they entered the space, both Jaskier and the real Dainty paled substantially, understanding the extent of the problematic situation in an instant. Geralt pulled out his sword again swiftly, ready to defend the group against the guards. But things didn't go as planned.

Chapelle looked at the two Dainty and offered a crooked smile. He looked at his guards and said.

- "Gentlemen, what a funny situation, isn't it ? Six months in the skin of Chapelle and I think I began to believe I am him. Who is the Doppler here ?" He asked looking at the two Dainty. No response. "We are not going to arrest you, don't be afraid ? We are alike."

In front of everyone eyes, Chapelle morphed back into its natural form. A grey small undefined humanoid was standing by his soldiers. Everyone was shocked by the revelation. Dainty Doppler morphed back too.

- "How can you do that in front of soldiers of the cult ?" It asked its comparse.

- "Well long story short. Chapelle died on the road in an unfortunate accident on his way to Blaviken, six months ago. He and his troops were passing near my bog. I came to push them out but when I found the agonizing man and felt the sheer terror of his men, I chose another turn. If they ever returned to Novigrad or went to Blaviken, they had no other choice than die. And they had to let their family suffer the same fate if they deserted. I learned from reading their minds that my bog was condemned to a short term anyway. A new route was due to cut my territory in two. And we all know a what it means... So I entered Chapelle's mind as he was dying to take everything that was him and took his place here. Why not try to survive our predicament together ?" It looked at the guards.

- "The substitute is even better than the real one was." Said one of them with a little smile.

- "There have been no death sentences since I have been here. Making people freak out is enough and quite fun actually." Chapelle had no expression on its slick face but its voice was joyful.

- "So it is all a lie ?" Asked Dainty in return to the men around, silently speaking about the cult, which they understood.

- "No, I still believe in the Eternal Flame. To me, The Eternal Flame is something more than just that simulacrum burning in the altars. Monsters are in the city already, even if they may not look like it. They have nothing to do with polymorphous living in bogs or what you could find ramping in the sewers. Our new Chapelle is a lovely creature that risked its life in the end. Now everything turned out fine but it was not guaranteed. It saved our lives and the lives of our families. We will protect the secret in turn."

- "And now I found a brother in my city doing weird stuff with my combustible supplies. What are the odds ?" Said Chapelle, morphing back into the high priest.

Dainty pointed at the two Dopplers.

- "Can I ask you something ?"

- "Yes." They replied simultaneously.

- "I see a fantastic economic opportunity there. What if I become the next producer of combustibles for the Eternal Flame and my Doppler becomes my associate ?"

- "I already know how to do it. I copied the formula from the mind of the current producer. We just need the workspace and some good workers. I guess that we can make a tiny investment to settle this."

- "If you make a little price favor for the north, I can help." Said Chapelle with a cornered smile. "I can put a little name on the citizen's list. But you will need to choose another shape."

The Doppler looked at the gnome and then morphed into another one. Dainty gasped.

- "He is the perfect mix between my cousin and my brother but in blond !"

- "You are quite a skilled Doppler." Said Chapelle with an admirative expression. "Rare are those who can mix memories and create new shapes. I like it. What name should I put on the registers, if we make a deal ?"

- "Tellico Dudu Lunngrevink is my name, Sir."

- "If everyone is happy with this solution."

From the guards to Jaskier and Dainty, everyone approved. Geralt was more reserved because of the experience he just had, facing the Doppler.

- "If you promise to behave and become a perfect citizen here, I am ok with your shenanigans. I don't care much about everything you spoke. Economics, religion… This is not my concern. I tried to take you down only because you seemed a menace under the Eternal Flame's aegis to the local population. I am a witcher, I protect."

Geralt saw the hint of crispation in Jaskier. The young man didn't like him saying those kinds of things out loud as it implied him possibly throwing his life away to save people. But this was an unmovable truth.

- "I promise, Sir witcher !" Replied Tellico quickly. "I aim to be exemplary. I want to live and I don't want to hurt anyone. I swear."

- "You would have to learn to refrain your defensive instincts then and learn the rules of the world you wanna be part of. Races that try to hide in the human world have to make twice the effort to be accepted. Because Chapelle seemingly succeeded, it doesn't mean that would be the same for you. I am not going to hunt you down, as long you fit and mostly not hurt people."

Tellico nodded. It was clear he felt bad for the troubles he caused and even what he did to him during their fight, playing with his deepest thoughts and insecurities. Geralt gave him his hand and the new gnome took it with a shy smile.

- "That settles this then." Said the witcher, softening.

- "Oh that is a brilliant end to that story and that lifts my soul." Jaskier said, putting a hand on his heart. He had some tears in his eyes. Always so emotional.

- "I don't know how to thank you." Said Dainty joining hands.

- "What about a good dinner and afters for those who like it ?" Proposed Jaskier with a suggestive wink. "I remember a crazy night with you and I currently wanna refresh those kinds of memories."

Geralt got that his friend needed a strong distraction for whatever happened in Oxenfurt. Tellico was without a doubt right about him. The thing his friend had to do and muted was about Julian and Jaskier always wanted to forget everything that was about Julian. It showed in the car. It was showing now.

Lost in his thoughts, Geralt let everyone plan the rest of the day and found himself included in a very socializing program for the evening and night, which was not to his liking, but seeing Jaskier shine again was soothing. Also he had something to prove to himself... and that might be the perfect way. Everyone moved out, except Tellico who approached him, probably feeling what was brewing underneath.

- "I am really sorry for what I did to you." He said, visibly pained.

- "It's ok. You used every card you had. And digging in one soul is in your nature. But that's what you will need to temper once you would have chosen who you wanna be here."

- "Yeah… I am aware and I am ready to face this challenge. But there is something I need to tell you."

- "What is it ?"

- "When a Doppler take someone shape or memories, it makes its own and for a moment our self is secondary. You can bet after six months, Chapelle is now almost more Chapelle then the original and I will learn to compose with that for myself, but... What I saw in you and your friend is unsettling, especially you." He licked his lips nervously. "You seem very satisfied with the idea that this is all true. I mean. The lack of feelings. The impossibility to love. Because this is all that you knew for decades. Like me you are a creature from an ancient time. We don't belong here and now. But even the oldest things evolve. Even the highest mountains erode. Even Dopplers adapt. That's a slow process and not always visible, until it is. So maybe an old big white wolf, who thinks he only bites hands approaching him, because they usually hurt him, has learned to appreciate hands that pet."

The metaphor wasn't fortuitous. Geralt understood that the Doppler was probably saying that Jaskier had somehow tamed the beast or something else more deranging to him.

- "Witcher don't love." He said quietly. "I adapt to this world but that won't change."

- "If you say so. I believe you." The Doppler bowed slightly before joining the others outside.

That short conversation made him uncomfortable. Jaskier was his friend and he didn't want to think otherwise. He knew that there was that muse concept he didn't quite catch but the young man never got further in his seductive approach than what he did when they met. He always respected his boundaries. They were sharing a lot of things like brothers. They had a strong attachment, a well being when they were together, but this wasn't love. He was sure of that. After five years, seeing what love looked like through the eyes of his friend, he could tell he never experienced something similar.

Geralt took his hat on the ground, and removed the dirt before putting it back on his head. He followed the group outside and leaned on the wall of the warehouse. He watched and listened to them from afar. They were speaking of things he didn't care much about. His eyes drifted on Jaskier who was participating actively. All seemed normal, all seemed good. But the words of the Doppler were floating in his mind.

Yeah... there are pretty f. up, the both of them lol. But the twisted part is in the next chapter and it will be mature. I feel weird about it ^^'.

Notes : I hope the pronouns thing isn't a problem. I used "he" for Dudu (Tellico) when Geralt identified it as a he and "it" mostly when he was seing the genderless creature. I based a lot my Dopplers true forms on the Changelings of ST DS9.

See you soon.