STARGATE ATLANTIS

Star Man – chapter 1

SGA SGA SGA

John Sheppard writhed on top of the covers of his bed where he had fallen exhausted onto it fully clothed. They now stuck to his skin with sweat. The laces of his boots had been loosened, but they were still on his feet. His weary body had just fallen down and slept before he could consider removing them.

Why?

They had returned to Earth with Atlantis. He had spent days organising the mass evacuation of Military personal, civilians, and, yes, aliens, to their new respective homes and assignments – that had been challenging to say the least the last few days.

John came awake eyes wide knowing fear had gripped his dreams. He sat up and put his head in his hands and sighed. Tomorrow was going to be tough.

SGA SGA SGA

Homeland Security, the IOA, and the all the powers that be had decided that they wanted Atlantis left to float at the bottom of the ocean alone and unattended until they decided what to do with her for a permanent base. Its shields protected it from detection and harm, but every day she stayed there Sheppard grew more and more anxious for the great ship he considered home.

Every day prior to today, he had been part of the staff that was giving daily tours to all department heads for the military and Presidential aides, until it had started to wear him down. He hated seeing his home treated like she was nothing, a museum piece…that they had all been through nothing!

Lt. Colonel John Sheppard was not happy.

He did not want his home to have the life sucked out of it as was happening with increasing speed. He had fought them to have residency; to keep at least a contingent of trusted ones there on a full -time basis, including his team, Radek, Lorne and a few others. But no. One by one they had had to leave him there standing alone in the gate room as they were ordered off Atlantis. Then it had been down to his team and one other – Todd.

Ronon and Teyla were to stay at Cheyenne Mountain until they could be debriefed and then they could go planet side. Rodney, although reluctant to leave Atlantis as well, could hardly wait to share his findings with scientist rivals that were now in the loop – and boy was he looking forward to it. Still, it was with a heavy heart he turned away from John to walk towards the 'gate. He was the last civilian to walk through it and back to Earth. He hesitated just a second going through, moving his head slightly to the side and catching the bowed head of his friend. Rodney turned around and walked back down the steps towards him. Ronon had hugged each and every one of them, Teyla had lowered her forehead; Rodney noticing just how much longer her and John had shared the moment. Tears were in her eyes as they were both escorted off Atlantis. John had clenched his fists so tight his nails had drew blood on his palms. Ronon just stared at him and gave him a quick wave and a 'catcha later' look – and he? Rodney had pretty much ignored what a huge moment this was for the Military Commander of a floating city that was now deep in water instead of space. Rodney quickened his pace until he was stood in front of him.

"John?"

He caught the surprised look and cock of his head as he looked up at him. "Rodney, what's up?"

"Not you, it seems. You – you are looking …down! Are you okay?"

"M'good." The standard reply, but… "…gonna miss." He wafted his hand. "…y'know…"

And Rodney did know. A montage of their previous missions, captures, tortures, successes, loves and losses flashed in his mind. At the centre of every one of them had been John Sheppard. He had been a rock, friend, and dare he admit it; brain behind most of their missions. He also flashed on the jokes they had played on each other and the private thoughts that John had trusted him to keep to himself. An all-rounder, John WAS Atlantis – Rodney should have paid more attention to just what coming back to Earth would mean to him. How his lively hood was now gone and he was no longer in command – hell, he hadn't even stopped to consider where he would go onto next, too wrapped up in his own successes to think of the others. Suddenly, Rodney felt sick with guilt. He swallowed, shook his head and looked up at his friend once more.

And there, Lt Colonel John Sheppard - and best friend, stood with a wry grin on his face and, hell, he was saluting him. Rodney gulped, and incredibly, blinked back a single tear that threatened to appear from a place he had thought was as dry as a bone.

"It's been a blast." He heard as if though a tunnel it had been whispered so quietly. But, he had heard him. He had heard the melancholy tones in his voice also. He sucked in his top lip and took a step closer, enveloping the lanky man into a surprise tight embrace. They partook in a mutual tap of their backs, and when Rodney stepped back again, the salute was still there. John quickly snapped his hand away from his brow and broadly smiled with Rodney following with a cocky flaunt of his own hand.

"I'll no doubt see you in a couple of days." John said quickly.

Rodney briskly nodded his head and stepped back. The 'gate would be shutting down soon. He had to leave him. "No doubt. Hell of a story." Rodney turned away and then stopped suddenly remembering something. He whirled around. "Hey, what about Todd?"

Then came the look on his friend's face he never did get to the bottom of whenever the Wraith's name was spoken. "He's next." He said, stone faced, and gone was the warmth.

"What will happen to him?"

John shrugged. "They won't tell me – exactly."

"Huh?"

"Classified and all that." This time he shoved his hands into his pockets and looked thoroughly dejected.

"But…but, heavens – you are the one that SHOULD know. They will need you to act as a go between. After all you have gone through with him…"

"Doesn't matter." John grimaced, clearly at odds with his feelings on the matter.

"Right." said, Rodney and the tone of his voice said he knew he wasn't kidding anyone. But Rodney didn't push it too much. "Perhaps they'll tell you now that we have all left."

"Yeah, I thought that." John pseudo agreed, nodding his head.

A voice that was not one of theirs, but a member of Stargate Command bellowed out loud. "'gate closing in 2 minutes."

"See you on the other side, then." John said as he watched Rodney, now reluctant to leave so fast, reach the shimmering pool.

"Don't be too long in leaving her." Rodney called over his shoulder. He sighed and stepped away from Atlantis and back into Earth leaving John alone and chewing his bottom lip as was his habit.

"Sir?"

John turned to meet who was speaking to him and went back to business. He immediately regretted not telling Rodney where Todd was going. He did know after all, but it was …classified – even to his team mates. The less people that knew the better.

He turned to meet the glass coffin-like container with the all the tubes coming out of it and that were to keep the occupant alive. He thought six marines walking behind it: guarding it, was a bit extreme given the Wraith inside was in a chemically induced coma and unaware of his surroundings.

He had an urge to reach out and touch the domed lid, but the IOA would be waiting on just the slightest opportunity to catch him out; thinking that he was a sympathiser of their captured enemy.

Instead, John acknowledged its departure with a nod of his head and remained unmoving as the coffin passed by him and moved towards its destination: Puddle Jumper No: 1. where more Marines awaited its delivery. He wasn't even allowed to fly the cloaked craft to McMurdo, which he took as a personal insult. The final nail in the coffin.

A hand on his shoulder and John jerked slightly at the touch.

"Easy, Colonel. Didn't mean to disturb your thoughts."

"Carson. Hey there. You didn't. I was just…y'know; thinking…"

"I know, lad." The doctor knew his friend would be a bit touchy at the Wraith's departure.

"I'm glad you are going with him to the base."

"Only to settle him in, unfortunately. Then I don't know."

John was instantly agitated. "But I thought you were assigned to his welfare."

"Carson sighed. "So did I, John. But it seems they don't know what to do with me seeing as my family back home in Scotland think I died years ago. I've to be given a new identity and…"

"Shoved somewhere out of the way." John sighed. "You were integral to the smooth running of Atlantis, Carson. There is no way I am going to stand back and see your contribution to our successes swept under the carpet." John clenched his fists and the walls took on a red tinge.

Carson was opened mouth and had a sad look on his face. He reached out and tightly gripped his arm "It was me, John…I want a quieter life. It was my idea."

John looked at Carson's hand on his arm and then at his kind face. "I can understand that." He lightly laughed. "The things you went through…"

"Not just me!"

"…we all went through things – but you, Carson. You fixed us up, and against things that were all new and unwritten before. You should be given a medal of the highest order. In fact…" John wagged a finger in his face, "…I'll make damn sure it says Carson Beckett on the bloody thing too!"

Carson really did laugh at that and pulled the Colonel in for the tightest hug. John did not pull back. The man knew every inch of him, he had a right to hold him, and John felt himself mellow into and return the embrace.

Eventually they broke apart and John was smiling.

"I am going to miss you, Doc."

"I'm not gonna miss you, you bugger." Carson joked. "…the heart failure you've given me over the years! I can sleep at night now without worrying if you are going to be alive the next morning." Carson stopped then because it suddenly dawned on him he really would have no idea where he would be the next morning and if he ever got wounded again. It was his turn to gulp.

"John…I…?"

"I know, I know. It's going to be tough. I'll be busy to begin with, but I hope we can all get together again at some point."

Carson nodded. "I hope so. I know that Ronon has threatened to run if he doesn't get to work for you still."

This raised one of John's eyebrows. "He did?"

"Aye, and Teyla. Rodney…well he's off on a high!"

John laughed. "I gathered that." His face fell again. "I have requested they stay with me, but I don't have the final say. Nothing has been confirmed yet."

"Aye, aye. Sorry, lad."

Suddenly the 'gate closed down and with it the blue that shimmered over the top of the glass coffin blinked out of existence, and suddenly the 'gate room itself felt like a tomb.

"Lorne's already on board. At least he gets to fly my 'jumper!"

"Aye. It's shame though it's not you. Did the others find out where Todd is going?"

"Nah. I think Rodney presumed it would be Roswell. He thought it fitting." John laughed. "I'll see you later. I've just got to turn off the lights and I'll be back on Earth myself in no time."

"Are you here again tomorrow?"

"No. I have several debriefs and then I have to report to Washington for an audience with the President."

Carson grinned broadly. "Ah, wish I could be a fly on the wall at that."

John grinned again and stuck out his hand. Carson took it and they shook vigorously. "Bye, John. It's been a pleasure. I'll hopefully see you soon."

"Bet on it!"

John watched Carson follow the back of the marines until they disappeared down the corridor. He looked up and nodded to Woolsey who was watching above in his office…old office.

John watched him nod and then walk towards him until they were the only two left in the 'gateroom following the departure of all the other SG Command staff.

"So? Only us two left, huh?"

"Richard." John acknowledged his presence, then looked at his feet for a long minute.

"They are going to bring in a team without me being here." John finally admitted to Woolsey.

"I wondered that. I was told to leave as well, John. If I had stronger connections, it might be different." He coughed.

John went to put a hand on his shoulder but he waved him off. "The laugh is we have the strongest connections – but even they have stronger ones!" He coughed again. "Damn, come back to Earth and I pick up a bug!"

John grimaced and felt his own throat tickle in sympathy.

"Colonel?"

"Yup."

"Can I ask you something … I want to know for sure?" His voice was quiet and studious.

John bit his lip, hating someone with his calibre wanting an honest answer he might not be able to give freely. But he nodded his permission.

"Would you have rather stayed in the Pegasus galaxy … in Atlantis…as we were? Fight the Wraith and all that?"

So he could give an honest answer after all. "On the money." He faintly smiled. "She is an amazing city. Nothing will ever feel the same again."

It was quiet for a moment as they turned their attentions to operations and closed all but essential lighting in the 'gate room.

"That's her asleep then. Just like the first day I stepped through from Earth." John was suddenly hit with sadness. He ushered Richard forward and they walked towards the 'jumper bay and into another 'jumper that was allowed Earth side, John starting her up.

Woolsey sat in the seat next to him that Rodney usually sat in – a fact that did not go unnoticed by either John or Woolsey. He looked straight ahead. "I would have too." He said finally.

John's hands stopped dancing over the controls and paused for just a second. He didn't turn to look at him, but closed his eyes for a brief second before answering. "Good! It would never be the same without you. You were needed there, Richard. You were an excellent leader."

The two men sat in silence during the flight upwards towards the deep water. The automatic shutters would seal the area as soon as the left, the shields would come up, and only those with a special code could ever enter that way again. They would be very few. John Sheppard was the only one from SGA.

As if the 'jumper realised it was leaving the 'mother ship' the lights dimmed for a moment as it entered the water leaving the two men in a dusky grey light that, thankfully, hid dew drop pearls of water on each of their cheeks.

"I'll be through the 'gate again in a couple more days, will I see you around?" John broke the silence.

"No, but I'll be there in Washington when you are there. John…?"

John knew by his tone that what he was going to say next was going to upset him. "Yeah?"

"I thought it should come from me. I have to tell you that they don't want you with your, erm, team. I'm still trying my hardest but, well, they are aliens after all."

"I know. I came to that conclusion on my own, Richard. I'll keep trying though. I'm owed one!"

"Or two!"

They laughed.

"But I'm also going to take them home one day." John said to the screen in front of him and just catching Woolsey's worried looking reflection. "If not on the Daedalus, then it will be in Atlantis herself."

SGA SGA SGA

Pain.

There was pain everywhere throughout his body. He imagined it felt like being born, maybe. But then it felt like his skin was being stripped from his body. Electric shocks jerked his limbs as he lay on the bed sweating profusely. John remembered a time when he had woke from surgery quicker than anybody had expected and the relief of waking to someone who cared for you enough to run and inject painkillers into an arm was not there. He thought he yelled out in excruciating pain. His head felt like it was going to explode as suddenly it was his head where all the pain was directed.

Heavy and uncoordinated arms tried to reach his head and hold it still, but the pain was building to a climax. He felt his body spin in mid-air. Fireworks boomed and the burst of tiny pieces of gunpowder fell on his exposed arms and legs and burned through the dermis. He yelped, screamed more and tried against hope to open his eyes to see what was going on.

Where was everyone?

"Why was this happening to him?" He doubled over in a coughing fit and thought he was awake.

"Sh…Shep-pard…?"

Suddenly he heard his name being called in the background. It sounded dull and weak.

It also sounded like Todd.

"Todd?" His imagination leaked out without his lips joining.

Pain was thrown his way again and he blanked out. It wasn't until it abated again did he realise that Todd was weakly calling out to him. In his mind he held his aching head still and tried to reply but his lips did not exist. Panicked he thrashed about on the soft but sweaty sheets underneath him.

"Use your mind." Came Todd's urgent voice. "Please, I need you to hear me this time."

"Wh…whaat…?" John thought through blinding agony that wanted to suck him back under again.

"LISTEN!"

Even knowing he was having another dream, the urgent tone of Todd's voice got his attention. "What is it? What's wrong?" He asked because he had to see the dream through even though he wanted to force himself awake and not feel the imaginary pain any longer.

"They woke me up. It hurts, John. They have taken me. Taking me far away. I…I think they will kill me. They do not understand."

A vice was squeezing his head tight, but John gritted his teeth and took note. "No they won't. You are in a safe place deep asleep." He wanted to reassure the dream Wraith.

"No longer, my friend Shep-pard. They woke me up. I never reached where I was to go. I heard them talking too early for them to realise I was awake. You must listen to me, Shep…John. You must listen."

At the 'John', John stopped writhing and was still. Todd had never called him by his first name before, and like Rodney using it occasionally, it always caught his attention. This must be important. Even dreams could invade the conscious.

"Go on." He mustered with imagined gritted teeth against the pain that continued to hover.

"I am sorry to cause you this pain, Shep-pard. I know you must be feeling it. But you did not know that I could communicate with you this way…"

"What are you talking about?"

"I once told you that you do not know Wraith. We can do many things you know nothing of. When I gave you the gift of life, I made a…connection with you. I can…in extreme circumstances only, dig deep within me for the q'lelle…using that strength I can enter your mind and speak."

"Wha…?"

"John, please. I know the pain I cause you is bad. Your brain is the only path I have to use to communicate with you. Please, I do not have long. Concentrate."

In a dream that wasn't a dream, seemingly, John must have nodded.

"Come get me. I do not wish to harm your world, John, but I am hungry."

"Where? Where did they take you" John suddenly believed that somehow what was happening was not a dream so he didn't want to waste any more time. He fought through the agony that was his head exploding and listened.

"I believe I am in desert surroundings. I do not know for sure where I am..."

But John did.

"I know where they would have taken you…it's a far cry from the snow and ice you were going to."

John felt like he had been stabbed suddenly in the head and he woke up for real, immediately vomiting over the side of his bed. He flung himself backwards after and wiped his mouth, breathing fast and deep for air.

He wiped the sweat from his forehead and the cobwebs from his face. That had been some dream.

"Please, John. Hurry."

John was off the bed like a shot when he heard the words, but his room was empty. Kicking his boots off and sitting on the edge of the bed, John placed his elbows on his knees and tried to breathe normally but he had a residual ach from the 'dream' and his head ached big time.

"John?" The voice was quieter this time, but John had no doubt now that it was certainly Todd's and he sighed and closed his eyes.

"I'm on my way." He whispered out, but got no verbal reply, just a muted groan.

It seemed what the Wraith ally was trying to tell him was true. Somehow John knew this. He also knew what to do.

He made his wardrobe in two steps, flung it open to check that he had still not unpacked his bags since being given the room when he arrived at Cheyenne mountain. Still he knew there was a change of clothes there. Civilian clothes as well. Good, they were what he needed.

John stripped off his sweaty BDU's and made for the shower. Todd's message had been frantic, but he afforded himself this time to regroup, and being clean and prepared could only go in Todd's favour.

So dried off, dressed, small bag packed: including some emergency drugs he knew he might need, John went to touch his ear as had been his habit for so many years. No radio. No Team! Dammit!

John had been told to take a couple of days off. He had initially refused, but the fact that he reported in he was now taking them, would not, unnecessarily, be suspicious to start with. Wanting the release of Ronon and Teyla, together with wanting Rodney along too; would.

He did the only thing he could do, and having no time to radio – he emailed Rodney and put the only words that would goad him into action in the reference section: ''Gift of life."

In the space to write he had to be cautious: 'Team. Locate. Desert? Don't ask questions, just do!'

He hated the fact that he had put Rodney in this predicament, but he had a few things to do first in the mountain, so as to not bring any attention to himself. Todd's message – although painful – had been loud and clear. Somebody was taking him away for their own purposes, and he had reached out to him in a way they had not known before.

True, Todd was an enemy.

True, John really didn't have the clearance for this mission, and doubted he could actually tell SG command.

True, he was going it alone without his team – he just hoped they would catch up with him and help retrieve Todd.

True. He faced a court martial for this. What the hell did he care? He didn't want the 'office' job he knew they would throw his way. Somebody, somewhere wanted the Stargate exhibition wiped clean.

'"Shit!" John shouted aloud to the walls. He thumped his thigh, but grabbed his gear and purposely strode out into the long corridor, and without too much delay signing forms etc, the outside world of his home planet was revealed.

Being a Lt Colonel was not without it perks after all, and after calling in a few favours, one shiny helicopter was waiting on him a few miles north where he was now headed.

Fighting a headache that was gnawing away in his brain big time, John arrived at his destination, and after a quick pre-flight he was airborne and constantly checking his emails.

Rodney had replied.

Flying safely, he opened the file.

'BASTARD!' in the subject line. John couldn't help but grin. He coughed and read the rest of the message.

'But I'm a genius. Be with you shortly. This better be good, Sheppard!'

John leaned back in his chair and sighed. What had he just got his friends and team into now?

The terrain flashed under him and the sun trailed his cloak behind him.

Reluctantly, John set down for a moment as his headache raged. He tried to reach out with his mind to Todd. Let him know he would save him soon, but he got nothing in return.

Sighing, John shifted in is seat. He felt warm. Reaching up a hand to his forehead he was surprised to feel it cold and damp with sweat. His clothes stuck to him uncomfortably. John reached for his flask and took a long swallow of water. He found it did not sit well with him and he clutched it tight through a coughing fit. Perhaps Richard had 'shared' his cold with him. Great!

John had flown over the area for the first time. Taking note of a river in the north east and several lakes as he flew by; otherwise it seemed barren in places, but he had found a gully just wide enough to hide the craft in and not was not immediately noticeable from the air. He shut her down and grabbed his supplies; ready to set off by foot.

He had a friend to rescue.

SGA SGA SGA

To be continued.