Chapter 17
Wait and See
"It Might Be You" by Stephen Bishop
I've been passing time watching trains go by
All of my life
Lying on the sand watching sea birds fly
Wishing there would be
Someone waiting home for me
Something's telling me it might be you
It's telling me it might be you
All of my life
ME/LE
I wake to the babbling sounds from Phillip, I roll onto my back, rubbing my face, I slide away from the sleeping form of my wife and sit up on the edge of the bed, and walk to his room before he wakens Louisa. "Good morning, Phillip. Did you sleep well last night?"
"Dadda," he yells out.
"Shhh… Phillip don't wake your mother, she needs her sleep," I say as I lift him from his cot. "Let's get you changed and see what is for breakfast."
I discover only one nappy in the cupboard making a mental note to buy replacements on my way from the cleaners today. I pull out his outfit and dress him. We make our way downstairs, I put him down near his box of toys and he quickly grabs his train and starts playing. I search through the items I unpacked last night and prepare his banana and cereal. I put the kettle on for tea and pull out one of the special teas I ordered for Louisa. Phillip comes across the kitchen to his chair,
"Up eese," he says as he pulls at his chair.
I pick him up and place him securely in his chair, and place his big scoop bib on him then set his bowl of sliced banana in front of him while I mix his cereal. I am wiping Phillip's breakfast from his face when I hear movement upstairs. I remove Phillip from his chair and put him in his playpen with a few toys, "Be good for Daddy, I need to brew some tea for mum."
Quickly I put together her tea and biscuits, placing everything on a small tray and carrying it upstairs to Louisa. She is walking out of the en-suite bath and I know she was nauseous, "Louisa get back in bed, drink this tea, and nibble on the biscuits. I will be right back. I need to tend to Phillip." I lay the tray on her bedside table, kiss her cheek and hurry back downstairs to our son. Phillip is playing so I take the time for a cup of espresso.
It is nearly twenty minutes later when Louisa comes slowly downstairs. She looks better, the tea must have helped.
"Louisa, come sit here," I say as I move her cushion to the sofa across from Phillip's playpen.
Upon seeing his mum, he stands and reaches out to her. "Just a minute Phillip, let me help her to sit down and I will take you to her," I say. I get her situated and bring Phillip to the sofa and place him next to her. I carefully watch to ensure he doesn't climb onto her lap before sitting in the chair opposite.
"Martin, I think we need to talk to Poppy and see if she is willing to adjust her time to help out for a few weeks until I feel better."
"We will need to adjust many schedules for the coming weeks. Joan and Poppy will be here soon, so we can discuss all the changes necessary." I can see tears well in her eyes, "Louisa, are you in pain?"
She shakes her head and I realize it is her hormones making her react like this, "Martin, we are in this situation because I…"
I stop her before she can continue, "Louisa, we are in this situation because you are pregnant, something we didn't plan so soon but I wouldn't change it for anything. Your injury will heal, faster if we take the extra precautions now to not reinjure you coccyx."
"Please use tailbone, it sounds less medical," she says with a slight smile. "When the villagers hear of the accident and we use the proper word, they will think I'm dying or something."
"Humph… most of them won't know where the tailbone is in my estimation."
"Oh Martin, be nice." Looking down at her son as she cuddles with him she asks,
"Phillip would you like mummy to read a book to you?"
Immediately Phillip wiggles away, sliding off the sofa with his daddy's help, and wobbles over to his bookcase, searching for a book. Finally deciding, with the help again from his daddy, he is sitting next to his mum waiting for her to start the story.
"I'll start our breakfast while you read to him. Don't allow him to climb onto your lap. I'll watch from the kitchen as much as I can." Martin hesitantly walks away; looking back once to make sure everything is fine. I am just placing our meal on the table when I hear a key at the front door, Poppy walks into the kitchen carrying a few bags, "Good morning Doctor Ellingham," she says when she sees me.
"Good morning…What do you have in the bags," I ask.
"Mrs. Norton and I picked up a few items yesterday and I brought Phillip's nappies, and bits of food to hold us till we knew what he needed."
"Mmm… thank you," I finally say, "Louisa is in the sunroom with Phillip, if you could watch Phillip while we eat, I would be grateful."
"I would be happy to help. Has he eaten this morning?"
"Yes, he ate cereal and sliced bananas. He seemed satisfied. I was going to give his rusk biscuit and juice while we ate."
"I'll help him with that and you and Mrs. Ellingham enjoy your breakfast," she says as she walks towards the sunroom.
As Poppy walks in, Phillip is moving to get off the sofa and Louisa is holding his hand to steady his slide to the floor. Poppy quickly moves to help and Louisa is thankful as she realizes the extra weight from a moving Phillip hurt, hopefully, Martin didn't notice. 'I need to be more careful' she mumbles to herself.
I noticed sudden movement around Louisa, Poppy, and Phillip but couldn't see any problems and Louisa didn't seem to be Phillip. I watch as Poppy picks Phillip up, softly talking to him and a huge grin crosses his face as she walks with him to his chair. I walk in and help Louisa up, grabbing her cushion, taking hold of her hand as we move to the kitchen for breakfast.
ME/LE
Louisa is walking around the ground floor as I finish in the kitchen clearing the morning dishes when Joan comes in loaded with two baskets,
"Martin, help, I'm come bearing booty," she says with puffing sounds as she hurries in.
I take both baskets from her and place them on the kitchen table while she closes the door. Louisa is coming down the hall on her way to the kitchen, pausing to drink water from her glass on the table. I noticed the amount and estimate her hydration level and was satisfied she was staying hydrated.
Joan interrupts my thoughts, "I brought plenty of vegetables fresh from the garden. Al has a greener thumb than I do and was busy these last week's planting, harvesting, and taking good care of the animals. Martin, thank you for insisting Al come to work with me at the farm. I don't know what I would have done when you called for my help that night. My veggies would be dead along with the chickens and sheep. It felt so good to come home and see everything running well, like a good working tractor," she announces as she empties the baskets onto the table. "I made sure to pick the iron-rich vegetables fresh this morning," she added.
Watching Louisa as she walks away, a thought comes to mind,
"Can you stay with Louisa for a while? I need to pick up a few things at the chemist and drop off our cleaning."
"Yes, I planned on staying for a while. Al is taking care of things at the farm so I can help here. Go, go, I will watch Louisa."
I find Louisa standing in my study looking out the window towards the sea and the school, immediately knowing what she is thinking. We have a few hard decisions to make today that will affect Louisa medically and emotionally. The village is her family, the children at the school are her children, I will need to help her more than I think I am capable of.
"Louisa, I need to go to the chemist and pick up your vitamins and order a few items."
She turns with a questioning look, "Martin, you'll not buy my prenatal vitamins from Mrs. Tishell are you?"
"I buy all my medical supplies from Mrs. Tishell. Why wouldn't I?"
"Husband," she says as she walks up close to me. "I would like this pregnancy to be our secret for a bit longer. Everyone in the village will know in a manner of minutes the moment you leave her shop our secret if you buy the vitamins and put them on your personal account. I can't walk into her shop and relive the comments she made when I came back pregnant with Phillip," she says as she walks back to the window staring out once again.
"Louisa, what did she say to you?"
I do not recall any gossip about Mrs. Tishell and Louisa, but I usually do not listen to gossip. Louisa remains silent as she looks out the window. Walking up behind her, I wrap my arms around her and nuzzle her neck inhaling her scent, "Louisa what did she say?"
"That I got what I deserved when I lured into my bed," she says emotionally and tries to pull away from me.
"Louisa, you didn't lure me into your bed, I willing wanted to since the day I met you on that plane. I remember you said I had a problem, but in reality, I had no idea how to talk to such a beautiful woman. I remained quiet even when you told me off." I hug her closer and kiss her neck, "Louisa, I didn't realize those things were said by her or anyone else. I will see what I have at the surgery and replace them when I order your maternity belt. I do need to drop off the cleaning. Is there anything you need while I'm out?"
"What are you planning for dinner?"
"I thought I would walk over to the fishmonger. I haven't had fresh fish for more than two weeks. Why would you like something different?"
"No, I would love some fish but maybe later this week can we have liver and onions? The liver is iron-rich," she says as she reaches up and tickles my ear with her hand as it moves to play with the back of my neck just at the hairline.
"Mmm… liver is not a meat that pregnant women should eat. The liver has an excess amount of vitamin A and can be harmful to the unborn baby. I can look for lean cuts of beef to intermix with the chicken, pork, and fish." I kiss her tenderly on the lips as she releases me.
"What about lamb chops? Are they bad for me too?"
"Lamb is high in cholesterol and saturated fats, but cooked in different ways could be beneficial, but we can't have lamb too often. I'll research some lamb recipes. I know you hate having fish every night, and it isn't healthy for a pregnant woman due to mercury levels in certain fish, I believe with a bit of research I can provide meals and snacks furnishing all the nutrients required throughout this pregnancy."
'That's my husband always the doctor. I wouldn't want it any other way; well, most times I wouldn't.'
ME/LE
My return from the village, delayed by everyone I met with questions about our personal life and why I left in such a hurry. I retrieve the vitamins from my storage cupboard at the surgery, slipping them among my other purchases before Morweena noticed. I discovered that the locum that Chris found on short notice is a bit lazy, and Morweena is upset with him canceling patients each day for no good reason other than he left to go to the pub, and she is tired of redoing the schedule constantly. This news only added to the questions I formed from earlier bits of conversations I overheard at the cleaners about the 'new doctor' spending his evenings in the pub. My first call is to Chris Parsons to first thank him for his help when I desperately called him late that night. Requesting him to remove the lazy locum and find another to work with me for the next few weeks. Why I will need part-time help for the foreseeable future will require further explanation.
"Chris," I announce into my phone when I hear his voice.
"Mart, how are you? How is Louisa?"
"I am fine. She is recovering and healing. We drove back from London last night and the drive took longer due to Louisa's coccyx injury so she is resting." Louisa is doing well, considering her injury and her pregnancy so should I tell him?
"Good, that's good. Mart, I'm sorry to hear about your Dad. I would have come, but Tracy is with her youngest sister that's about to give birth any day now and I couldn't leave our children," he says in an apologetic voice.
"No, quite alright, if you had gone my mother would have harassed you and I wouldn't wish that on anyone."
"Your mother was there! Why did she show up, I thought she was happily divorced and living with some fella in Portugal?"
"No, she showed without her lover… she thought she was inheriting money from my father's estate. She didn't and was very angry the last time we spoke. Do you ou remember John Rasmussen from Imperial? She didn't like something he said and caused a scene after the funeral. There shouldn't be any more issues with her in the future as she more than likely went back to Portugal to brood."
"Yes, I know John, he's attending the NHS meeting in Truro at the end of next month, and the same meeting I wanted you to speak at regarding lack GP filled positions in Cornwall."
"Chris, you are far better representative to talk to the paper pushers. What I would say would most likely upset them."
I need to change the subject before Chris talks me into attending the conference. "Chris the reason I called beside to thank you is in regards to Louisa's health and my need to be near her. This summer is going to be difficult with her injury and we will make extra trips to Truro for her specialist visits. I will need a reliable locum to cover my surgery and I don't want the current one, a replacement sooner than later to benefit the village."
"Your current covering locum was called on short notice he was the best I could do. What's wrong with him?"
"If you call spending more time in the pub than the surgery, it would be considered good medicine and then the village has no problems. He cancels more patients per day than he sees. Morweena is having a difficult time finding appointment spaces for actual sick people when he cancels them. I looked at the appointment book today, he doesn't open the surgery until half nine, closes for lunch at half twelve and reopens at half two, and closes for the day at half four. I have decided to be in the surgery tomorrow morning and open per my usual time and I will see patients until he shows up. That should help with the backlog of actual sick villagers. I'll work through his lunchtime and again when he leaves. Morweena is setting appointments up now. She knows this village to discern which are whiners and real patients."
"Mart, I don't understand why you will be here in Truro for medical consults for Louisa unless she requires surgery that you didn't mention. Is there something you're not telling me?"
I thought I could keep my private life… well private. It is difficult to talk about private events even with a friend like Chris… I argue with myself the pros and cons of telling him, the main pro is he is my boss, "Hmm… Louisa is… pregnant… with twins," I stammer.
"Congratulations Mart. That's wonderful… oh I can where your problems lie. Who is her Obstetrician?"
"I would like to have Doctor Rawle be Louisa's OB since he is an expert with this type of pregnancy and he knows Louisa's medical history. Doctor Thyring at St. Mary's recommended him and planned on calling him, I need to find out if he will take Louisa's case."
"Mart, I'll go down and talk to him. When do you want to see him?"
"I would like Louisa to see Doctor Rawle as soon as possible. I appreciate your help once again."
"What are friends for, and don't you worry. It is our job to take care of Louisa and I can't wait to see two more of your children running around, especially if they are anything like Phillip. Mart, you will have your hands full with three children under the age of two," he says through his laugh. When he finally stops laughing, "I will do what I can with another locum, but it will take some time. Would you like Doctor Ledford again if I can hire him?"
"Doctor Ledford," I don't recall any doctor by that name, "Who is Ledford?"
"Mart, the locum that covered for you last summer, I don't recall any complaints from you in regards to your patients."
"Yes… He should be adequate."
"Good, I will see what I can do. Is there anything else you need?
"No, thank you again, Chris. Good-bye."
My next call is to Doctor Gee, to set up Louisa's appointment and ensure her medical file has been transferred from St. Mary's. I am surprised as we talk that everything is in order and we had an appointment the following week.
Before I do anything more I need to check on Louisa and Joan. I open my study door follow the sound of music to Louisa's room and find Louisa on the floor doing her pelvic exercises modified for her injury. She is staring at her laptop where I can see a person and Louisa is replicating their movements with it all set to music. The sight brings back the memory of last summer when Louisa was working on losing the baby fat, as she called it, the sight then and now stirs that strong male response in me, and like last time I need to leave the room. Just like last time Louisa comes into the kitchen to find me in almost the exact spot drinking a glass of water. She smiles but doesn't say anything because we are not alone, Joan walks in behind her and now I am truly embarrassed.
"Would like a glass of water?" I believe it is the same question I asked Louisa last time.
"Yes, I would, Joan would you like a glass of water," Louisa asks allowing me time to gather myself.
"Yes, a glass would be good. I can't believe I am exhausted just moving my body that little bit," Joan says.
I think for the moment, I don't recall seeing Joan in the room and doing any exercise, my eyes only on Louisa and my mind lost in lust. I fill two glasses with water and place them on the counter, still thinking of the scene when I looked in, my face must have shown confusion as Joan burst into laughter. "Marty, what's wrong with you?"
"You said you were exhausted, were you exercising with Louisa?"
"Yes, why do you ask? You don't think I can do those exercises? Even injured Louisa is better than I am, but I was doing the pelvic exercises right along with her."
"I… don't recall you in the room, well you weren't in the room on the floor exercising," I state.
"Martin, Joan was exercising with me, but she may not have been in the room just then. I think she was in the room under the stairs when you came in to watch," she says with that glint in her eyes when she knows why I'm hiding behind the counter.
This past year, Louisa and I learned quite a bit about each other. Our communication has improved significantly especially since the occurrence last February. Her teasing eyes, now help to relax me and my response I now understand is a normal man, husband, and usually, I am not embarrassed but with Joan in the room, standing there drinking her water, I can't look at her because then I'll become embarrassed because my aunt knows me so well and I will feel like an oversexed teenager.
"Oh, that explains it," Is all I can say as I turn back to the sink to refill my glass? "I have a few more things to finish before lunch," I say as I take my glass and leave the kitchen.
ME/LE
I return to the kitchen three-quarters of an hour later to find Joan making lunch, Poppy feeding Phillip, and wondering where Louisa is as I look around. As if Joan can read my mind, she points upstairs. I acknowledge her unstated response and turn around to go upstairs. As I reach our bedroom, I can see Louisa surrounded by pillows lying on her side sleeping. The combination of pregnancy and injury must be dreadful for her. Tired as our children grow inside her body and in pain from the injury, along with the ligaments stretching in the pelvis and lower back as her uterus grows and puts more pressure on the injury. I sit down on the bed beside her, looking at my pregnant wife remembering I did not know the last time on how she looked, felt when her morning sickness started - how her body changed and adapted to my son growing in her. I will experience this pregnancy from start to finish and I promise myself to do everything in my power to safeguard this pregnancy and Louisa to the best of my ability as a doctor but more importantly, as her husband.
When Louisa returned last spring, opening that door, the emotions that ran rampant through me were so foreign, with many of the emotions I had never felt before except maybe one the deep feeling of pride that we made a human being together. I recall that same feeling when Edith mentioned she was pregnant, for a split second I felt that same pride but the feeling was quickly squashed by her next words and I remembered telling myself that I never want to feel that again. The hurt was so deep as if I lost a part of me. I come back to the present and I notice Louisa is looking at me with those beautiful eyes, and as usual, I can tell she knows how I feel,
"I didn't mean to wake you," I say.
"You didn't wake me my grumbling stomach did. Is lunch ready?"
"Joan was putting the finishing touches on it when I came up to see you."
"Help a lady up and allow me to go to the loo and then you can walk this pregnant lady downstairs, kind sir."
I see her eyes sparkle as she looks at me and wonders what I have done to deserve such a woman. I help her to a sitting position and then to stand, taking her hand I lead her around the bed with her leaving me as she walked to the en-suite and closed the door behind her. A few minutes later we are slowly walking down the stairs when Louisa says, "When I go up or down the stairs, I feel some pain, I wonder how long until I can do the stairs without pain?"
"Each day should get easier, your body is getting used to the muscles around your injury and this new usage. Remember your first days in the hospital and when we walked around the hotel. You are doing better and the stairs will be easier as you take them each day. I thought maybe before dinner, while Poppy is caring for Phillip, we could go for walk along the footpath and get some good Cornish air," I remark with a small smile on my face.
"It will be good to get outside and not breathe in car exhaust for a change on a walk together."
The smell coming from the kitchen smelled wonderful, but I can see not for Louisa as I turn her towards our downstairs loo, closing the door behind us. I make sure Louisa's hair is out of the way, after several dry heaves, her stomach calms down.
"I'll go and make some ginger tea while you use a cold flannel on your face." I open the door and quickly exit, entering the kitchen to see Joan busy pouring water over a teabag. "Is that for Louisa?"
"Yes, take this to her room and let her drink it and nibble on the biscuit," Joan says handing the cup with a couple of plain biscuits on the saucer.
I sit with Louisa as she finishes her tea and a biscuit, noticing her color returning to normal and her eyes brightening. "Are you feeling better," I ask.
"Yeah, I hate this part of the pregnancy."
"Were you sick like this with Phillip?" This is a question I needed to ask, from what I've read each woman has different reactions to the hCG hormone.
"No, I was only nauseous in the morning when I first woke. If I ate little bits every few hours I was fine, so far that is not working for me this time."
"Maybe more protein throughout the day will help with these symptoms that tend to wane come the second trimester when hCG levels off. This particular hormone is produced by cells in your growing placenta and spurs the release of the hormones estrogen and progesterone, all contributing to the myriad of symptoms such as nausea and fatigue. Are you having heartburn?"
"So, like with Phillip, when I am around fourteen weeks, give or take a week, I should be less nauseated."
She says this with the expression I have learned, she is upset with me because I went into my so-called doctor mode and lectured her. To this day I don't understand, "I thought you would want to know why you feel the way you do," I explain.
"Never mind Martin, I'm feeling better and hungry, why don't we eat lunch. Joan is waiting for us."
"Louisa, don't get upset with me. I am concerned with your health. This pregnancy will not be like yours with Phillip," I say as I help her up, taking her hand in mine, relaxing as we walk into our kitchen.
ME/LE
After our lunch of Joan's wonderful chicken soup and salad, I decide we need to settle a few problems and tell Joan and Louisa about the surgery problems. I clear my throat to gain their attention, "The locum that Chris hired on short notice is not working out. I need to spend a few days at different times of day seeing patients until another can be found."
They look at me with questioning looks as Joan nods and looks to me to continue my explanation.
"Morweena brought the problem to my attention that the locum spends more time in the pub than seeing to the village's health. I spoke with Chris Parsons, to see if the locum from last summer is available. Tomorrow I will go in at my usual time, see patients until the doctor comes in around half nine."
"You mean he isn't seeing patients until late morning, what about villagers that need to get to work?" Louisa asks.
"That is exactly why tomorrow I need to go to the surgery early, and likely the rest of this week to see those villagers. Morweena is contacting patients and scheduling them at eight. I will return a little after half nine but will return at half twelve when the locum leaves for lunch."
"Exactly how many patients does this guy see each day?" asks Joan.
"Around twelve to fifteen, it seems he cancels patients that are too difficult to diagnose. As I was saying I'll work till half two and return for the last time at half four to see the few patients that can't come in earlier. This is only for a few days until the backlog of sick villagers is taken care of and the new locum can start."
"Martin, just fire the locum and spend all day at the surgery until the new locum is hired," suggests Louisa.
"But I want to be here as much as I can to look after you. You would be alone. Poppy would be busy with Phillip. If something happened and I wasn't here I could never forgive myself," I say with my emotions filling my eyes.
"I could help Louisa for part of the day and maybe we could find someone for the other part of the day. I can do my deliveries in the morning, I usually am finished by late morning and can come here fix lunch for us and stay until you close the surgery. This is just a short-term fix isn't it?" Joan asks. "So we just need someone in the morning until I finish. Louisa do you know anyone looking for a job that would be willing to watch you?"
"Yes, that should work if we can find someone. Louisa sees both specialists in the coming week and we will know how the pregnancy is progressing and her healing coccyx."
"You two talk like I'm a child, not even in the room; taking over my life," Louisa bursts out angrily.
"No that is not what I'm doing," I say in a raised voice. "Louisa, it is early in your pregnancy, this time with twins and you could have early labor resulting in a miscarriage. You could become nauseous, light-headed, and faint with nobody here to call for medical help. All we want for you is to safeguard you and the babies. This won't be forever just until I'm satisfied that the doctors taking care of you guarantee your health." I finish in a more quiet tone of voice that starts to crack.
It is quiet for some time as we appraise the significance of Louisa's outburst. I take my time thinking about what I can say for Louisa to understand the health issues that can arise for the next months.
"Martin, I understand what you are saying, but you always see the worst. I just want to take each day at a time and work to it, and that is mid-July, I'll be twenty weeks pregnant and twelve weeks with my injury. I won't teach until we know my options but I can finish my course on the sofa with skype and apply for different grants while I rest at home. I will exercise to include my walking and with the weather improving each day I could enjoy walks outside into the village…"
"But you need to have someone with you for the reason's I mentioned, if not Joan then whom?" I counter.
"I have some ideas to whom. I can swim at the Leisure Center and if they are offering prenatal yoga classes I can register for them. Joan has offered her help some days and we can work out a schedule to get to my goal date. I know my meals cooked by you will contain all the nutrients I need to keep the anemia under control. Martin, I'm not arguing that this pregnancy will be easy, it's that you can't control everything pertaining to me without my say."
I know everything she says makes sense but my emotions and my medical knowledge need Louisa to understand, it's not just her body I'm worried about. Slowly I nod my head, "Right, I'll let you take care of things the way you want." I feel defeated, "I have more phone calls to make. I'll be in my study." I leave the table and walk into my study, firmly closing the door. Settling at my desk, I start my computer and open a web browser to begin my research.
End of Chapter