Sorry for the delay, but RL slammed into me this past October. Three surgeries later, I am on the mend. I had an accident on the way to a party with a friend. I shattered my right wrist and broke my left arm. The awkward impart with the ground also injured my shoulder. Yes, I was a mess. The medication made for interesting recordings as I tried to continue the story. Maybe I should type them up some day because they were very funny. Hopefully now I can get back on a regular schedule since most of the story is blocked out just need to finish the research on multiple births, find the right lead-in be it music, poetry, or proverb, work on the dialog (the hardest part).
Thank you for your reviews and to all that have stuck with me on this story, You are the Best. Now onto the story...
Chapter 30
Amor Est Vitae Essentia
"If I had a flower for every time I thought of you… I could walk through my garden forever."
- Alfred Tennyson -
ME/LE
The lights were burning brightly, later than usual, in the kitchen at the farm as the two older inhabitants spoke of the latest news from the village.
"She is getting bolder. Showing up at the surgery, luckily for Marty's sake, he hasn't been there either time."
"I believe we need to take this situation in hand and find out what Margaret is really after."
"I would like to do more to her than take the 'bull by the horns' Ruth. We will start with our old friend and invite him to the pub for a quiet dinner and a talk."
"Maybe he knows what Margaret is after if not we get Margaret to explain herself and take it from there."
"Marty and Louisa will be away this weekend starting on Thursday after her prenatal appointment, Al is picking Phillip and Morwenna up after surgery hours so we will have babysitters on hand for the evening."
"I'll contact Fred Jenkins and arrange dinner for Thursday night," announces Ruth.
ME/LE
I love the sound of her voice, the Cornish accent on certain words, so different from my London accent. My evenings are so different from my earlier time here, even my London adult times, with the sound of her reading to my son as I cook our dinner. The music playing softly in the background adds to the ambiance. This is different too, I used to prefer quiet while I hid away in private; this is just another adjustment I have made. I chose the Liszt collection of Harmonies for tonight and notice how the music soothes our very active son to sit still on his mother's lap, of what is left of it. Louisa looks larger than she did just before Phillip was born and she has several weeks to go.
"Dinner is ready," I announce.
Phillip quickly slides off Louisa's lap, heading my way. He is always ready to eat.
"Dada, up."
"What do you say, Phillip?"
"Dada up, pwease," he repeats after Louisa admonishes him for forgetting his manners.
I pick him up and offer my empty hand to help Louisa up receiving a smile as I escort my family to the kitchen for the meal, I made just for them.
Later that evening in our bedroom, Louisa finishes packing her weekend bag with her clothes for the cottage while I finish reading to Phillip in his room. I explain that he will spend some time with Gram and Autie at the farm. This news is why I am currently 'baaing and mooing' as we finish his farm book. Upon closing the book, I realize he is asleep against my chest, carefully I lay the book on the table and take a firm grip on his little body lifting him to my shoulder and carry him to his crib. As I pull his blankets securely over him my mind wanders to him as a small infant when the thought of being a father was overwhelming. Now it seemed silly to be afraid but again my anxiety about two more children comes to mind. Can I do this again and not fail them? Louisa asked if I was fine with my new life and as I watch Phillip sleep, my anxiety fades. I can't wait to be a father again; it is all I ever wanted now. I lean in and whisper 'I love you' to Phillip, turn the light off, and walk to the bedroom I share with the most beautiful woman in my life.
ME/LE
"Fred can't make it Thursday evening, he suggested Monday instead," Ruth says as she walks up to the Joan out by the barn.
"A few more days won't hurt. Marty and Louisa will be out of the village until Sunday evening. So, Margaret can visit the village all she wants, she won't see them."
"Did Martin or Louisa say they would call us with information on how the appointment went tonight?"
"No, I don't expect to hear anything from our nephew. The last time they went away to the cottage she came back pregnant, at least that can't happen again," Joan says with raised eyebrows and boisterous laughter.
"That boy needs to relearn where babies come from or he is going to have a very large family," Ruth smirks as she looks down at her great-nephew pulling on some vegetable Joan was harvesting.
ME/LE
The drive was uneventful as I pull into a parking space at the hospital. We escaped the village just as I noticed PC Penhale setting up his speed trap and refused to stop as he waved frantically for me to stop, or maybe slow down as I was exceeding the speed limit. All I wanted to do was to get as much distance between us and the village to start our holiday.
While Louisa went to provide the different items to the nurse, I took the time to talk to Doctor Rawle. He was standing with another medical colleague I didn't recognize.
"Doctor Ellingham, I would like to introduce you to Doctor Anthony Tonkin, the Paediatrics* Specialist for multiple births. Anthony this is Doctor Martin Ellingham, husband to the patient I mentioned."
"Doctor Ellingham, a pleasure. I have knowledge of your expertise in the medical field and will enjoy our time working together."
"Yes."
I look towards the door Louisa disappeared through hoping it would open and she can join me. My plea is answered before I finished it, as the door opens and Louisa exited, looking around the room as I am no longer in the seat, she last saw me in.
"Louisa," Doctor Rawle calls, "Won't you join us."
I take Louisa's hand as Doctor Rawle introduces Doctor Tokin and we make our way to the exam room. Louisa laid down on the exam couch and rolled her shirt up and her pant waistband down in preparation for the ultrasound.
"Let's take a look here," Doctor Rawle states as he applies the cold gel and begins to move it around spreading it over Louisa's belly.
"There," Louisa says as she smiles at me.
"Yes, that is baby A. Let me get some measurements.
The mechanical dinging as the measurement is set and reset are the only sounds until Doctor Tonkin speaks,
"The baby is a good size."
"This is the larger of the two but once again is shy and I can't get a look to establish its' gender. Okay, have finished here so let me slide the wand over here. Yes, here he is."
The sound of dinging starts up again and Doctor Tonkin once again provides a comment.
"This one is a good size also, but yes, his measurements are a tiny bit smaller. But you know that doesn't mean too much when both babies are healthy looking. I can't see any problems other than from what I read on your chart on the back injury," he says but notices that I want to say something. Holding his hand up, I stop and wait for him to continue. "I see it has healed but I would recommend we discuss options when Doctor Rawle finishes. These are only my suggestions for those two lovely children."
After a few more minutes Doctor Rawle hands me a few towels to clean Louisa's belly off and invites us to his office. On the way, Louisa excuses herself to go to the toilet.
She returns and I take her hand and we sit for the news on the twins.
"The twins are doing fine; each has gained weight – weighing around two pounds. Baby A, our bigger foetus is one point one kilogram and Baby B is point nine zero kilograms. They are about the same length now at thirty-three centimeters with Baby A equaling that measurement, and Baby B is thirty-one point 5 centimeters. Both are within the margin for weight and height."
"Did you notice any problems?" I ask.
"None, at all. Louisa is carrying them well and they are growing. Louisa is probably having more issues than the foetuses. Is the extra pressure on your bladder causing you any problems?"
"It feels like I'm going all the time. I wake Martin up a few times during the night, but he is being great about it," Louisa says as she squeezes my hand and smiles at me.
"She complains of being bloated and constipation, so I have adjusted her diet to help with these symptoms. You haven't had any heartburn lately, have you?" he asks not noticing the looks of the two other doctors in the room.
"No, the tea and the change in diet have helped."
"What tea?" asks Doctor Rawle.
"Martin searched the internet for teas that I could drink while pregnant since he didn't want me drinking anything with caffeine in it. One of the teas is formulated for pregnancy with herbs traditionally used to soothe occasional heartburn. I drink it before meals and before bedtime."
"It is a mellow mint blend of marshmallow root, lemon balm, chamomile, and some other ingredients. Louisa will be able to continue drinking this particular tea when she starts breastfeeding and is having heartburn symptoms," I state.
Once again, the two doctors look at each other in surprise.
"I didn't have too many issues with morning sickness either. Martin found a different tea for me to settle my nausea."
"When Louisa enters her third trimester, she will drink a labor prep tea that will help balance her hormones for labor, delivery, and postpartum issues," Martin adds to our conversation.
"What made you think of all these different teas, doctor?" asks Doctor Tonkin.
"Why wouldn't I look for all means for the health of my wife and children? There isn't a thing I wouldn't do for them. I know I have driven her mad by taking her blood pressure daily, but she is at risk with this pregnancy, and I will do all that I can as her doctor and husband to control those risks. By adjusting her intake her BP is currently not an issue. She will not have double the risk of gestational hypertension with this pregnancy. I take a sample of her urine every day to test for protein. Gestational diabetes shouldn't be an issue either with her current diet and our lifestyle. Her weight is within the margin, actually on the lower side, once again because I watch her health."
Louisa is now tapping her fingers against my arm trying to gain my attention to calm down. But I am in what she calls doctor mode and can't understand these doctors are questioning why I have done what I am doing for my wife and children, so of course I continue my explanation.
"Doctors, what I don't understand is why you question me?"
Clearing of throats by both, with looks of amusement Doctor Tonkin, explains.
"Doctor Ellingham, we are not questioning you on why you have done what you've done but are surprised..."
"More than surprised," interrupts Doctor Rawle.
"We know your reputation as a doctor, surgeon – your thoughtfulness is just out of character for what I have heard regarding you. With that said, everything you are doing, if I didn't know who you were - would be of a doctor doing his best for his wife... you just surprised me and for questioning you, I apologize."
The silence in the room became disturbing.
"Martin, I understand the doctors are happy with your treatment of my pregnancy and they don't see any problem with it," Louisa says as she pulls my attention towards her. The rolling of her eyes towards the doctors is my cue to…
"I accept your apology," I say.
Another clearing of a throat by Doctor Rawle before he speaks adds to destressing the room.
"I see in Doctor Gee's notes that he is satisfied your coccyx injury is healed and shouldn't be an issue with the rest of your pregnancy until you go into labor. He states there is a chance that the delivery of both foetuses could be an issue and recommends a cesarean instead of natural delivery."
"I agree," says Doctor Tonkin, "but for a different reason. With multiple births there is always complication during labor; especially if the first foetus is not in a favorable presentation. Your size Louisa means you are small in size and may develop problems during labor. I read your notes on your first pregnancy; your labor and delivery were normal, but it was noted you were exhausted and stayed in the hospital longer than normal standards. If you have difficult labor and delivery, you are at risk of complications."
"Martin and I have spoken of the risks, and we have decided I am having a cesarean when the time comes."
With Louisa's declaration, the three doctors discussed the impact on Louisa and the twins when the time came. Doctor Tonkin informed us what his role would be during delivery and the months following. He departed sometime later after issuing a hopeful statement,
"I don't want to see you before your thirty-six-week Mrs. Ellingham. Let the children 'bake' as long as you can and make my job easier," he said with a smile.
With the departure of Doctor Tonkin, Louisa decided to ask a few questions regarding the everyday problems a pregnant woman has and received the same answers that I gave her.
Dr. Rawle changed the conversation to sex with interruption by Marin growling and then blushing and Louisa giggling.
"We visited Dr. Gee last week and he gave us the go-ahead," Louisa says while looking at her embarrassed husband, "And we have already performed satisfactorily if I must say so."
This only makes me blush more if that is possible. "Louisa, that statement is not necessary."
Keeping his smirk hidden, Rawle continues his advice ignoring both comments.
"As you remember with your last pregnancy sex is fine; your developing babies are protected by the amniotic fluid and the strong muscles of the uterus. I don't see any underlining complications such as placenta problems. However, pregnancy itself can change comfort and desire levels. As long as you are comfortable, most sexual positions are fine. I would like to limit those where your husband… Mmm… where Doctor Ellingham puts his weight on…"
His commentary is disrupted by my outburst, "Surely you of all people would know I am not some uneducated idiot…"
But I stopped my outburst when I felt Louisa's hand touch my arm. Glancing down to look into her eyes, with complete understanding, I look at Doctor Rawle, "My apologies."
With a nod of his head, Doctor Rawle continued. "Now let's talk about precautions. These symptom's I need to know about immediately – unexplained vaginal bleeding, if you start leaking amniotic fluid. Sometimes overstimulation can cause uterine contractions, which include breast stimulation, an organism and hormones from your husbands' semen will cause false labor."*
Clearing his throat Doctor Rawle looks at Louisa. "With twins, there are more complications caused by intercourse and most likely it will be the last thing you will desire in the coming months."
The look in Louisa's eyes, that internal eye-rolling expressing what she thought of his comments on desiring our time together, if her last pregnancy was an example.
"We will take your comments under advisement Doctor," I respond.
ME/LE
Meanwhile in the village…
Margaret makes her way around the village, stopping at different points and listening to conversations near the pub, outside the vegetable stand and fish market, and finally making her way to the Large restaurant for lunch. She discovered that the owner loved to gossip, and she needed information on her son.
"The Doc doesn't live…"
"Dad, Sarah needs your help in the kitchen," Al announces loudly stopping his father mid-sentence.
"Sorry, needed in the kitchen. When you are ready to order tell my son what you need," Bert says.
Al follows his dad into the kitchen, shutting the door behind him.
"Gossiping with your audience again dad. Do you know her and why would you tell her where the Doc lives?"
"She asked, my boy."
"You know the Doc doesn't deal with tourists at his home. I don't understand why you have to tell everyone things that are not your business. Doc and Louisa deserve their privacy; you and Mrs. Tishell are always telling their business to everyone in the village. How do you know she isn't… a part of a gang to abduct Phillip?
"She is too old to be part of a kidnapping. She has been here before and asked about our Doc for a medical issue and I told her he worked right up the hill."
"I have seen her at the surgery, but she left before seeing him. There is something strange about that woman, dad. Don't tell her anything else. If something happens with the Doc, I will make sure PC Penhale knows what you told her."
Al turns and walks out of the kitchen, bypassing all the diners as he heads for the surgery to talk to the Doc before he leaves for the day. His anger with his father came to light when Morwenna reminded him that Doc and Louisa left for the weekend, and he was to take Phillip to Joan.
Margaret waited for Bert to return and when he didn't return from the kitchen, she left the restaurant in search of someone else to get her information. It didn't take long before she saw the crowd of women in the chemist's shop talking and laughing together.
She pulled open the door and nonchalantly glanced around the shop, picking up different items as she listened to the women.
"May I help you find something," came a sing-song voice of the woman behind the counter.
"No, just looking to see what you carry," Margaret said waving her hand in a stay behind the counter don't bother me type of wave.
Her ears perked up and she moved a bit closer when she heard them say something about Martin, his wife, and a cottage get away.
One was saying, "He's taking her to the same cottage that they went to in late February."
Another said, "Where is the cottage?"
The first woman says, Trevorrow's place near Perranporth."
Lady behind the counter states, "Not Pearce Trevorrow place, is it?"
The first woman again, "Yes, he was going to sell after his wife passed but found out he could make a few pounds by renting it out. From what I heard the Doc loves the place and plans to use it each year."
Lady behind the counter again, "I remember the place, a very secluded spot about a km from the end of the public beaches. I don't know why he would take her there. Their place is secluded enough."
The only man in the shop states, All I need are some field glasses and I can see their secluded back gardens easily. He wants privacy and the Trevorrow place is the place for that."
Margaret has lost count of who was saying what when the next question was asked, Clive, how do you know that field glasses can see into their back garden?"
At this question, before the man called Clive could answer the woman behind the counter broke up the discussion when she enquired what I needed once again.
"No… nothing here that I can't buy closer to home," Margaret responded to the woman and then turned and walked out with the tingling of the bell announcing her exit.
Now that she knew where her son was, how to go about finding this place? 'Map, I need a map and get directions. I need to call Fred to let him know I will be away a little longer.'
Margaret walked along the lane towards the water, trying to decide where she could lay her hands on a map. Startle by the sign in the window, 'maps for sale' caught her eye. She quickly walked in and once again started browsing the contents of the shop, hoping nobody was paying attention to her. Slowly moving towards the display holding the maps, she realized she had no idea where Perranporth was; probably another god-forsaken village. She pulled the one that looked helpful, scanning for the place on the cover with other named places she had no idea of their location either.
"May I help you," announced a middle-aged man with a huge grey beard.
"I… I lost my map that has my friend's home location was marked. I have no idea if it is north of here or any other compass direction. You see, I'm from London and don't know the area," Margaret lied. "My husband usually drives but didn't want to travel today."
"What is the name of the place?
"I think it is called Perranporth or something like that."
He turned to the display, searching for the right one before pulling it out.
"This should get you where you want to go," he said and turned to the clerk asking for a stamp for his letter. Securing it to his envelope and handing it to the clerk, he turned and left the shop.
Margaret stood in front of the display looking at the map in her hand before she decided to buy it and return to the car park before searching for her new destination.
ME/LE
I pull the Lexus onto the gravel drive of the cottage, allowing a slow breath out to clear my mind. Reevaluating the medical, and the not-so-medical information we received today for the past forty minutes has me confused. I need more time to think, maybe after I unpack the cold pack a walk along the path is required. Turning towards Louisa, her eyes show concern at my silence.
"Let's get in and unpacked… and I… I need some time to think about the medical information we received today."
"Martin, there wasn't anything brought up today that we haven't discussed."
She sees the look in my eyes, "Let us get unpacked and enjoy the warm sunshine on the patio, okay."
"Humm… yes."
I pull our bags from the boot and help Louisa across the gravel path up to the door, "Why don't you unpack while I pull the rest of the things from the car."
Louisa and I make our way upstairs to the bedroom, nothing has changed, everything looks clean, but the air is a bit stale. Louisa seems to notice and starts opening windows as I drop the bags on the bed.
When the last of the cold foods are in the fridge, I pull out the single red rose I requested when I made our reservations. I place it on the table, along with a cold bottle of water and the envelope, propping it up against the bottle, and walk out the back door for a walk down to the sea.
Louisa notices Martin from the window walking slowly away from the cottage on the path they walked so many times as individuals and as a couple, her thoughts wonder what has her husband in such a mood. She makes her way downstairs, into the kitchen where she notices the envelope on the table, but her eyes water at the single red rose laying in front of it. Picking up the rose, and brushing it across her lips, she picks up the envelope and water bottle and sits in the lounge on the sofa.
Slow lifting the lip of the flap, she pulls out the contents and begins to read the letter her husband has given her.
My dearest Louisa,
Before you came into my life I was at a loss for life. Loneliness made me a bitter man for most of my adult life. I realize it was my fault for pushing others, especially you, away as I constructed my prison of contempt and misery. You helped dissolve that prison – forever. I have you in my life and that of the children you have given me – would anyone of my past ever believe that possible? Not if they met you and see the love you share with me every day.
Oh, my beautiful Louisa the happiest that roars in my chest each morning as I realize I am not dreaming, you are here beside me. We should be celebrating our second anniversary, instead, we are on our first. Some memories bind us much longer than our vowels, starting with our firstborn. The kiss between us in your back garden only to be interrupted by my job, I wished it lasted forever, I didn't want to leave. -My heart broke watching you walk down the hill, in your wedding dress, away from me. I berated myself every day for that blunder; my first failure. When you left my life became a quagmire of self-disgust, which I couldn't help thinking was justified. Then I recall our short time together and the disgust faded for a bit. The month Chris introduce Doctor Hayes was the beginning that changed my life. With his help, I would conquer my haemaphobia, return to surgery in London, but most important – find you. Louisa, my love.
I should thank that imbecile in London that decided a pregnant woman an embarrassment as that decision brought you back to me. Opening that door, on that early spring evening, the vision of you made my heart stop for a brief moment and allowed me to fix my first failure. Our conversation gave me hope that I could once again have you in my arms. My subconscious took action that my conscious self could never do. Waking up with you in my arms invokes the memory of our first night together. In my mind, I could visualize our life happily together. As the months passed, you allowed me to touch you, kiss you, and make love to you and the dream started to become my new reality. In my mind's eye, I can see a long life together. Together, a family, something I never saw in my future until you sat across from me on that plane so many years ago. You were so beautiful, that fiery way you talked to me, I was so confused, and sometimes I still am when I do or say things that upset you. I don't do it on purpose, please remember that.
Thank you for Phillip, he is the best gift anyone ever gave me. I can't wait to meet the twins; I feel greedy that two more will love me as I will love them.
As we start our second year together, remember you are the essence of all my life desires – you are my bed of roses, and spirit to my inflexibilities – it is you that makes me a better man.
You are the wife that I worship deep in my heart; it is a possessiveness to protect you for the rest of our life. More than ever, I am certain my decision that spring night more than a year ago was the best I have ever made. We are building a life together, a bright one, where you will be in my arms forever. If I haven't said it before –
I love you. Martin
Upon my return to the cottage, I find Louisa curled up on the sofa, as much as a pregnant woman can in her third trimester, holding the letter with tears staining her cheeks; she is beautiful. With a quick visual examination, I know the tears are not related to a health issue and feel guilty that I made her cry with my letter.
"Louisa…" I hesitantly say.
"Oh Martin, come here," she says while waving her arms to gather me in. "Your letter is lovely and captivating… Hmm… Do you really love holding me in your arms," she says as she wipes the tears from her cheeks with my white handkerchief.
"The best part of my day is when I am not kissing you."
ME/LE
Later that evening after an afternoon of cuddling we are sitting on the loveseat on the patio listening to music. I cooked a delicious dinner, we walked the path to the sea as I explained what bothered me about our appointment, and as usual, Louisa eased my mind on my deficiency of thought before my randy actions.
"This piece is by Bedřich Smetana* called 'The Moldau', it is a symphonic poem portraying the movement through sound of the Vitava in Czech and Die Moldau in German." While the music played, I narrated the poem as each movement painted a picture with an instrumental sound. "He wrote six symphonic poems, this is the second part of the collection titled Mà Vlast, My Country or Homeland."
Louisa leans in closer to snuggle into my side.
"The first movement depicts the river's movement from the mountains in the Bohemian Forest. The river beginnings are in two mountain springs; one spring is warm, and the other is cold. The flute and clarinet take turns of the ripple of the water before combining into one powerful river."
As the music plays Louisa listens with interest as I describe different movements of the poem.
"Throughout the entire piece, this thickly orchestrated stately theme repeats symbolizing the mighty river."
"It seems this little one," she starts to say as she places my hand on the pounding on her left side of her belly. "Loves the roaring of the river," she finishes.
I move my hand slowly to the other side and this side is moving but not as quickly. "A music critic," I smirk.
The music changes.
"Farther downstream, the river passes jubilant hunters, portrayed by the horn melody and then with a change of rhythm, I believe a polka, signaled a wedding dance."
We listen to the different rhythms, then they change to serene melodies. "This is where the river enters a gorge, and according to legends there are water nymphs that come out to bathe in the moonlight," I say, scoffing at the idea.
"There is the main theme again, so that means the nymphs are busy elsewhere," she says with a suggestive eyebrow raise.
Suddenly the music breaks into a tumultuous dissonance of sound.
"This is where the river enters St. John's Rapids and into the city of Prague. The sound of arpeggios of regal hymn announces the castle Vyšehrad, once the seat of power for Bohemian kings. The river is nearing the end of its journey for this piece."
Louisa squirms closer, her head just under my chin, with a soft sigh, she kisses my neck.
"The close of the piece issues a loud two-chord rhythmic sequence of sounds repeating themselves," I finish as the music changes to another piece.
"Martin, that was lovely but how do you know so much background on that piece of music? I have never ventured to research the meaning behind any music I enjoy."
"A music appreciation course I took before medical school. I found I enjoy many works of music; they are more enjoyable when you understand what the composer fashioning the notes and rhythm around."
"Your narration made it easy to visualize the river's flow from beginning to end with the music. Thank you, Martin, for tonight's entertainment. But now I think we should retire upstairs and compose our own music," she says as she pulls my hand taking me up the stairs to bed.
End of Chapter
*Liszt Harmonies Poétiques et Religieuses are very relaxing to listen to as background music. You can find the complete list on YouTube.
*Paediatic, paediatrics and paediatrician are the British spelling for pediatrician in the US.
*The hormone prostaglandins in sperm can help ripen the cervix and in high-risk pregnancy it could be an issue for early labor.
*Bedřich Smetana was a Bohemian composer of operas and symphonic poems. He was the first truly important Bohemian nationalist composer. 1824 - 1884