Disclaimers: I do not own Invader Zim

Author's Notes: And now we return to Zim's dark past! Thank you for reading, and please enjoy Chapter 19!

(Back with Zim; 141 Years Ago...)

[Location: Planet Vort]

Months had passed since the first day that they had met, and he was shocked that today marked the one-year anniversary of his time on Vort. Lard Nar was just so likeable, he made it easy to forget. Forget that he was Irken, a tool, a means to someone else's end.

He wasn't a monster, a green insect out to get them. No! He was a person, he was Zim, a friend, a companion, someone whose opinion mattered to them. He was welcomed to their table to eat meals, and study in the labs, and before he knew it Zim was spending less and less of his time with his peers with each passing day.

And boy did it feel great!

It was like this great big weight had left him, like he was no longer baring the whole weight of the Irken Empire on his shoulders. He could be himself with no fear of judgement, or scorn!

And now one year later Zim was thriving as one of the most trusted allies on the planet, and his peers praised him for it. They seemed to mistake his behavior for acting, saying his skills would definitely land him top of the class for sure. Zim felt a sour taste in his mouth whenever he was praised by them. It made him feel filthy to betray them. He told Lard Nar about this feeling.

"Do you think they are right?" Lard Nar asked.

"My programing says they are." Zim said as they continued on their latest project. Through Lard Nar, Zim had learned that he had a knack for inventing things. Zim found this weird since he was not coded to be a scientist. However, he enjoyed doing it all the same.

Lard Nar taught him how to make blueprints, and how to drawl up to scale, and how to mathematically figure out how much material he would need to cover the projects. Today they were working on a force field strong enough to protect an entire planet from attacks from space.

Zim was so proud of their work that he told Tallest Myuki all about it in his report last week. She appeared please to hear this information and it made him glad.

"Yes, but what do you think?" Lard Nar asked him.

"I do not have an opinion." Zim answered robotically.

"Come now we both know that's not true." Lard Nar said. "What do you think of this?" He pulled up a blueprint of a large ship.

Zim was amazed. "It's massive." He admitted.

"Yes, it's a gift to your leader." Lard Nar admitted. "My leaders want to show them gratitude for our alliance."

"Tallest Myuki would be pleased." Zim told him. "She loves being recognized by her allies."

"Yes, how do you feel about her?" Lard Nar asked.

Zim is confused. "What do you mean?"

"Do you think she is a fair ruler?" Lard Nar asked.

"Fair is a made-up word." Zim answered. "Nothing is fair, an Empire cannot work off of fairness."

"We Vorts seem to manage." Lard Nar countered.

"Why do you do this to me?" Zim asked. "You make me question my people, why?"

"Zim, you don't know how cruel your people really are." Lard Nar told him. "They have brained wash you all to think a certain way. It is wrong."

Zim didn't say anything else, but he did repeat those words to his leader, Tallest Myuki was stunned that her allies would try to sway him away from her. However, she did not call Zim a liar. She simply told him that the Vorts did not understand the importance of their programing. It protected them from the hard truth that their allies would have to learn on their own.

Life was cruel, and only the strong survived.

More months passed, and Zim could tell Lard Nar looked on edge, like something horrible had happened. He tried his best to ignore the obvious fear in Lard Nar's eyes but one day his curiosity got the better of him.

"Lard Nar what is wrong my friend?" he had been talking so freely to him now that the word friend wasn't a lie anymore.

"I…" Lard Nar looked unsure, but he seems to think Zim is trustworthy because he continues. "Emeka overheard Tallest Myuki speaking with cadets Red and Purple." He said. "They are plotting to betray all their allies."

"What?" Zim was poled. "No, she would never."

"She is." Lard Nar said. "She thinks we are influencing you to think poorly of your laws."

Zim froze, was this his fault? Sure, he told Tallest Myuki that Lard Nar tried to sway him, where his peers' escorts doing the same thing?

Had this been their plan all along.

"No, she would never, she thinks you're wrong, but she would never attack you for your opinion." Zim sounded so sure.

"What happens to those of you who have their own opinion?" Lard Nar dared to ask.

"We get reprogramed." Zim says simply.

"That's wrong Zim you should have your own opinion." Lard Nar tells him.

"It's for our safety, opinions lead to harm!" Zim hissed.

"And if reprograming doesn't work?" Lard Nar dared to ask.

Zim is confused. "What do you mean?" he snapped. "They continue to be reprogramed until it does."

Lard Nar shook his head. "Ask you leader what happens to those she calls defective."

Defective, Zim did not know the meaning of the word back then, this is because defective Irkens are not spoken about. They simply disappear one day, forgotten, never to be seen again. Still, he asked Tallest Myuki the next week during his report.

"Defectives?" She asked.

Zim nodded.

"How old are you now Zim?" She asked.

"18 years my Tallest." He answered.

"And who told you about defectives?" she asked.

"Lard Nar did." He answered truthfully.

"Still trying to sway you, is he?" She asked.

Zim nodded.

"Well, I suppose you are old enough to know." She told him. "A defective is someone who resist the programing no matter how many times it's re-downloaded." She explained. "They think for themselves, and that as you know is dangerous."

Zim was visibly shaking; he was a defective! Sure, he knew he was different, that he thought things that weren't allowed, but he never knew what it was called. "What happens if they can't be reprogramed?" Zim dared to ask.

"Zim you are an adult now." Tallest Myuki said softly. "Try to understand, some people cannot be helped, and like a virus they must be eliminated in order to spare the rest."

ELIMINATED!

"As in death?" Zim asked, chokingly.

"Oh, Zim you must understand we are giving them their best hope." Tallest Myuki told him. "Imagine how much it must pain them to feel so indifferent from the rest of us. It must pain them to have such traitorous thoughts."

'It must? As in she doesn't know for sure?'

Zim seems to look at his leader for the first time in his life. "That's so awful." He said honestly.

"I know, but it's like a very sick three horned beasts, why let it suffer more than it should?" Tallest Myuki asked.

Suffer, was he suffering?

Did he need to be put down like an animal?

"Do you understand Zim?" She asked.

Zim went on auto pilot. "Of course, I just wish there was another way."

"We all do Zim." Tallest Myuki assured him. "Now be a good little invader and find out what that Lard Nar is up to, and I'll make sure you get the highest score in the class."

"Yes, my Tallest." Zim answered.

"Be sure to notice everything, we must put an end to them and all our allies before they infect the rest of us with their defective ways."

So, she was plotting to attack their allies, and Red and Purple were helping! "Goodbye my Tallest."

"Goodbye Zim." She said. "I am so glad we had this talk."

He waited for her to end the call before crying his eyes out.

How could she speak so coldly of her own people, they were sick, and she treated them like they were a different race entirely.

Zim stood up and looked at himself in the mirror as if seeing himself for the first time. "What's wrong with me?" he asked. "So, what I think differently, I'm still a good student, a good invader, a good Irken!" he thought out loud. "I'm just like the rest."

But it's a lie, and he knows it the moment he says it.

"No…they are cruel, they stomp all over each other, climbing to the top. They plot behind the backs of their allies; they kill their own."

'I'm not sick, they are!' His programing screams at this thought, but for the first time ever Zim ignores it!

"There is nothing wrong with me!" He says out loud. "It's not criminal to be an individual!" and to his surprise the words do not tastes sour, they tasted right.

He storms out of his bedroom, to find his friend.

It doesn't take him long to find Lard Nar, he was sitting at his desk in the lab working on a blueprint. "Lard Nar…" He whispered.

"Zim!" Lard Nar turned, suddenly, hiding his work. "I didn't hear you come in." He pauses as he notices his tear-stained face. "Zim have you been crying?"

"You're plotting against her, aren't you?" He asked.

"Zim you must understand." Lard Nar began, but Zim stops him.

"I want in." He said.

What?" Lard Nar was stunned. He wanted in. "Why?"

"How long have you known?" Zim asked. "How long have you known I was defective?"

"So, I guess she told you." Lard Nar said.

"How could she do that? How could she be so cruel!" Zim screamed. "They're all monsters, I hate them; I hate them all!" he screamed.

Lard Nar nodded. "We can stop her, together Zim." He tells him. "Together we can show your people that she is wrong. That violence and war is not the answer. That they can think for themselves and do whatever they want. They can be free!"

Free!

The word had a strange attraction to him.

He hardly knew the meaning of that word, but if it meant a world where he was accepted, and not killed then he wanted it!

The next weeks to come made him feel like he was stepping on broken glass. Full of secret meetings with Vorts planning to betray his leader, his people! And yet, no one questioned his loyalty. Zim was one of them! And he was very vital to their cause. He'd spy on his peers for them, tell them things Tallest Myuki said.

With everyday their plan grew, and within another year they had a forcefield strong enough to cover the whole planet of Vort. They even told Zim that he could live with them, that he could leave Irk and be his own person with them here.

"Not return to Irk?" Zim asked.

"Think about it." Emeka said. "You could be free."

"But my people need me." Zim insisted. "They need me." He repeated.

"We understand Zim." Lard Nar assured him. "Just please don't let them change you."

Zim nodded and left to go to his quarters.

"We must strike first Lard Nar." Whis insisted.

"No, we cannot, violence is not the answer." Lard Nar answers. "We are a people of peace."

"And if this force filed doesn't work?" Chu dared to ask.

"Yes, if it fails so do, we." Tally agreed.

"You've all already started something haven't you?" Lard Nar asked.

"Please understand Lard Nar." Tec said. "Our leaders will force us to take the peaceful path, and we will parish for it."

"What did you have in mind?" Lard Nar dared to ask.

"Chop off the head of the beast and the body will fall." Whis said.

Lard Nar's eyes widen. "You don't mean?" He asked.

They all nodded.

"Are you daft? We cannot kill Tallest Myuki!" he exclaimed. "It will infuriate the armada! It will start a war for sure."

"It must be done." Emeka said. "Don't you see a plan is already in the works, tomorrow Tallest Myuki will be here to discuss new trade opportunities with the rest of our allies."

"That's when we'll strike!" Tec declared.

"No, I will have no part of this!" Lard Nar insisted. "There is another way!"

"It's too late, the order has been given." Tally said. "Tomorrow at noon a wanted assassin will kill Tallest Myuki, and no one will blame us."

"And Zim?" Lard Nar hissed. "what about him? He trusts us! We told him that we were just building this forcefield to protect ourselves. How do you think he will feel when this happens!"

"He may turn on us." Tec realized. "We might have to deal with him too!"

"Do you hear yourselves!" Lard Nar screamed. "You all sound just like them, you all sound just like Irkens!"

Red and Purple back away from the door that they had been hiding behind and snuck back towards their rooms they had to warn Tallest Myuki, and Zim! They were in grave danger.

"No, I will not be part of this!" Lard Nar repeated. "We are done!" Lard Nar shouted as he took the blueprints for the forcefield and threw then into a nearby shredder.

"Lard Nar, we needed that!" Tally screamed.

"Now you can't hurt Zim!" He shouted. "Because those were his plans, only he can remake them."

"You fool!" Whis hissed.

"Maybe, but Zim is my friend, and he would never betray me." Lard Nar insisted.

"I hope you're right." Tally said. "We'll call off the assassination."

"We will?" Whis asked.

Tally nodded as she sends the order. "Yes, Lard Nar is right this plotting has changed us, I see that now."

The others soon agree with her, and Lard Nar breathe a sigh of relief, but it's far too late, the damage is already done, and tomorrow they will all be dead.

-To Be Continued

End Notes: Oh no what will happen to Zim and his new friends? Find out next time in Help! My Boyfriend's an Alien!

Until next time this is Emily signing off 😊