"Tomorrow, our lawyer, Joseph Stanford, is coming by," Emily announced one Friday night at dinner.

Lorelai made a face. "Ugh. Crazy Sissy's dad."

"That's terrible!" Emily exclaimed. "Sissy was a good friend of yours."

"Mom, Sissy talked to her stuffed animals and they answered her. I bet Jules has run into her in the psych ward a time or two," Lorelai quipped.

Juliet frowned at her. "That's not nice."

Lorelai's mouth dropped open in mock horror. "Et tu, Brute?"

"Wrong play, Lor," Juliet said with a smirk.

"If we could continue our discussion of Shakespeare's works another time," Richard broke in. "Your mother was speaking."

Emily smiled at her husband. "Thank you. Now, where was I?"

Rory looked up from her plate. "Uh, Joseph Stanford is coming tomorrow."

"Yes," Emily nodded. "So, Rory, your grandfather and I thought it might be nice after dinner for you to go around the house and pick out what you'd like us to leave you in our wills."

"Take a look at that desk in my office," Richard said proudly. "It's a really fine Georgian piece."

"Why don't I ever bring a tape recorder to these dinners?" Lorelai whispered to Juliet out of the corner of her mouth.

Rory shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "Oh, well, anything you want to leave me is fine."

"Nonsense! You should have what you like," Emily protested with a smile. "So, look around and when you see something you like, stick a post-it on it."

"Okay, you two have officially hit a new level of weird that even I marvel at," Lorelai said, her eyes wide.

"We're all gonna die sometime," Juliet pointed out, glancing over at Lorelai as she took a sip of her wine.

"Of course we are, Whizzer," Lorelai countered with a pout. "But that doesn't mean we have to talk about it."

"We should," Juliet argued, swirling some leftover sauce around on her plate. "Every time a patient dies, their families don't even have time to grieve because they're so busy debating burial versus cremation, because they didn't bother to ask the person while they were still alive."

Lorelai leaned forward on the table, turning to her sister with a challenging smirk. "So, what do you want, Jules? Buried or cremated? Or do you want to be tossed out to sea?"

"Please," Emily broke in, her tone annoyed. "This is no conversation for the dinner table."

"Hey, you started it!" Lorelai reminded her, holding her hands up in surrender as the maid brought out dessert.

Juliet craned her neck to peer into her bowl, smiling when she saw it contained chocolate pudding instead of some fancy French dessert.

"Oh cool!" Rory exclaimed, her eyes lighting up.

Lorelai's brow furrowed. "What's that?"

"It's dessert," Emily answered shortly.

"It's pudding!" Lorelai exclaimed in disbelief.

"It's good pudding!" Juliet added, taking another spoonful. "This is way better than the stuff we have at work."

"Well, it's not as though Lucinda used a packet of Jell-O to make it," Emily pointed out archly.

"I've never had pudding from a crystal bowl before," Rory marveled.

"You like the bowl?" At Rory's enthusiastic nod, Emily leaned in conspiratorially. "Put a post-it on it when you're done."

After dinner, the three younger Gilmores stood in the living room, putting Post-its on various pieces of furniture.

Lorelai stood in front of a giant vase, her brow furrowed in disturbed concentration. "So, what do we think of this?"

Rory frowned. "Where would we put it?"

"Maybe we'll use it to store Jules' ashes after she's cremated," Lorelai quipped, wrapping an arm around her sister.

Juliet gave her a wry smile, raising her eyebrows. "You'll probably die first, since you're older."

"Stop talking about who's going to die first!" Rory exclaimed, her eyes wide with horror.

"Oh good, you're still here," Emily said, her heels clicking as she walked up to them. Placing a hand on Rory's shoulder, she gave her granddaughter a smile. "Any special requests for dinner next week?"

"O-oh! Well –" Rory stammered, looking at her mother for help.

"Mom, Jules and I want to talk to you for a minute," Lorelai began, giving Emily a nervous smile, then addressed her daughter out of the corner of her mouth. "Rory, why don't you go say goodbye to Grandpa?"

"Very smooth," Juliet remarked sarcastically as Rory left the room. Lorelai just narrowed her eyes in response. Deciding to get the ball rolling, Juliet turned to their mother. "So, uh, Mom, you know how Rory's birthday is next Friday?"

"Yes," Emily replied, dragging the word out warily.

"Yeah! Um," Lorelai tugged on the hem of her sweater anxiously. "We were thinking that maybe we could push our dinner next week to Saturday."

"What are you going to do on Friday?" Emily asked, a falsely sweet smile on her face.

The sisters exchanged a nonchalant little smile, and Lorelai shrugged at their mother in reply. "Oh, I don't know."

"Well, perfect. You'll come here and we'll have a little party," Emily decided, as though she'd come up with the perfect solution.

A muscle twitched in Lorelai's jaw. "I was just hoping we could do it another night."

"Well, why come on another night when her birthday falls on the exact night that you do come here?" Emily goaded, folding her hands primly.

"Mom, please?" Juliet beseeched, pulling out her patented 'baby of the family' eyes that hadn't worked since Rory was born.

Emily shrugged in mock apology. "I'm sorry. Friday nights are my nights. That's what we agreed on when you borrowed money for her school. The rules haven't changed."

Juliet and Lorelai exchanged an exasperated look, and Juliet broke in, sensing her sister's self-control wearing thin. "Mom, come on. It's not like she's asking to cancel dinner. We just want to reschedule."

"Juliet, this does not involve you," Emily warned, her voice beginning to simmer.

Juliet resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "She's my niece."

"And she's my granddaughter," Emily contested, smiling smugly at them both. "So. Either be here on Friday for Rory's birthday, or you can find another way to pay for Chilton."

Lorelai blinked at her mother, looking like a million retorts were at the ready. Juliet stepped slightly closer to her sister, barely touching her elbow with her hand. Lorelai took a deep breath. "Fine. We'll see you Friday."

She took Juliet's arm and marched her out of the living room, leaving a trail of steam behind her.

"And dress appropriately!" Emily called after them gaily.

"She's gonna need that will real soon," Lorelai hissed in Juliet's ear.

On Wednesday, Juliet plopped into the driver's seat of her car after another grueling shift, resting her forehead on the steering wheel. After a minute or five, her cell phone rang, and she let out a groan, hoping it was the one person she could tolerate a conversation with right then.

"Hello?" Juliet answered.

"Your sister and I are going shopping tomorrow," her mother informed her without greeting.

Juliet's head jerked back in surprise, momentarily jolted out of her exhaustion. "You are?"

"Don't act so shocked, Juliet. It is not at all unheard of for a mother and daughter to go shopping together. Some women even enjoy shopping with their mothers."

"Sorry," Juliet backtracked, trying to explain herself tactfully. "You and Lorelai just. . . have different tastes."

"Of course. Lorelai's so stylish, while my taste is frumpy and old-fashioned," Emily lamented bitingly.

Juliet ignored the obvious manipulation tactic, grateful her mother couldn't see her eye roll through the phone. "So, you guys are going shopping tomorrow?"

"We are. For Rory's birthday. And since you and Lorelai can't seem to function unless you're attached at the hip, I figured I'd invite you along."

That was disarming too. Emily tended to go for the 'divide and conquer' approach when interacting with her daughters.

"Um, okay," Juliet agreed, too surprised to question her mother's motivations. "That's actually great, because I haven't gotten her anything yet either."

"Oh. Well, good. We're meeting at Damion's at three," Emily informed her.

Juliet scratched her nose, mentally running through her work schedule. "That works. I'll be coming straight from work, so, I'll um. . . I'll be in scrubs. Just so you know."

Emily sighed, as though Juliet had told her she'd be covered in bodily fluids too. "That's fine. I'm sure your sister will show up in a firefighter's uniform or something equally ridiculous. They'll build a Spirit Halloween around us."

"Mom!" Juliet chastised.

Static crackled in the phone at the force of Emily's sigh. "What, is Lorelai the only one allowed to make jokes? Nothing that comes out of my mouth could possibly be funny?"

Juliet rubbed at her eyes, too tired to come up with the type of response her library of self-help books would advise. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She quickly hung up the phone, blinking back tears of frustration. Why was talking to her mother so hard? Emily was right: mothers and daughters often shopped together and enjoyed it, while the closest Juliet came to a positive interaction with her mother was the lengthy discussions she and Lorelai had about her.

At 2:55 the next day, Juliet walked through the automatic doors at Damion's, looking left and right for her mother. Not seeing her yet, she took the time to quickly shake out and finger-comb her hair, wanting to give Emily as little ammunition as possible for her little digs.

"Jules!" she heard Lorelai call from behind her, waving madly.

Juliet felt some of the tension leave her shoulders, and hugged Lorelai briefly. "Hey! Look who's early!"

"Well, I don't want to anger Emily Post, do I?" Lorelai quipped, smiling.

Juliet raised a skeptical eyebrow at her sister. "When have you not wanted to make Mom mad?"

"I don't know," Lorelai shrugged, ducking her head a little. "It feels like she's been making an effort lately. Maybe I should too."

Juliet made a face, looking at Lorelai incredulously. "How has she been making an effort? When we talked yesterday, she was just as passive-aggressive as usual"

"The pudding!" Lorelai declared, jerking her hand forward as though that explained everything.

"The pudding," Juliet repeated, raising her eyebrows.

"You really haven't learned to read my mind after twenty-nine years, Jules?" Lorelai sighed, tucking her hair behind her ears as she prepared to explain. "She served pudding for dessert last week because she knows we like it, and she asked for our help buying Rory's birthday gift!"

Juliet considered this for a moment. "You know, it was weird that she invited me along today. She usually likes us better one-on-one."

"See, pudding!" Lorelai exclaimed, pointing a finger in her face.

"Oh! Speaking of pudding," Juliet began rummaging in her purse and produced a pudding cup. "One of my patients didn't want theirs."

Lorelai placed a hand to her heart, sticking out her bottom lip. "And you thought of me?"

"Just making sure you don't replace me with Mom," Juliet shrugged.

"Oh, well, that depends on whether this is chocolate or vanilla," Lorelai teased, peeling off the lid.

"Swirl."

Lorelai gasped, wrapping her free arm around Juliet and smacking a loud kiss to her cheek. "You're my favorite sister."

"Wow, I'm honored," Juliet laughed, leaning her head against her shoulder.

Pulling away, Lorelai ducked her head under the bottom of the pudding cup. "There's no spoon attached!"

"Use the lid," Juliet advised, rolling up the tin into a makeshift spoon.

Lorelai nodded her satisfaction and began eating her pudding happily. Unfortunately, that was how Emily Gilmore found her daughters; one dressed in her clothes from the hospital, and the other eating hospital pudding with a spoon made of rolled-up tin foil and plastic.

"Lorelai Gilmore! You cannot eat pudding in a department store! It could stain the clothes!"

"Ess her faul'," Lorelai said around a mouthful of pudding, pointing at Juliet.

"It is not!" Juliet said indignantly.

Lorelai swallowed. "Is too!"

"Honestly," Emily broke in, rolling her eyes. "You'd think I was shopping with two seven-year-olds from the way you two bicker." She let out a soft gasp. "Oh, look! This pashmina is lovely!"

She held up a royal blue pashmina, rubbing the soft cashmere between her fingers reverently.

"Mom," Lorelai began, glancing at Juliet with an amused smile. "Rory's not much of a pashmina gal."

"But the blue would look so wonderful with her eyes!" Emily protested, hugging the scarf like it was a purring kitten. Lorelai just shook her head no. Emily pursed her lips, dropping the pashmina in resignation.

As Lorelai tried to re-fold the scarf neatly, Juliet glanced around the store and then gasped in delight, pointing at a t-shirt a few feet away. "Lor, look! Farrah Fawcett!"

"Farrah!" Lorelai squealed, practically bouncing over to the display. She took the shirt off its rack and held it up to her front. "Get this for her, Mom. She'll love it!"

"Both of you, be serious," Emily admonished. "We're shopping for Rory."

"No, Mom," Lorelai corrected, gesturing between Juliet and herself. "We're shopping for Rory. You're shopping for your imaginary granddaughter, Consuelo Vanderbilt."

"I just want to get my granddaughter something nice," Emily insisted, an edge to her voice. "Am I so horrible for that?"

"Hey, I think this mall has a Barnes & Noble. Why don't we go there instead?" Juliet suggested, wanting to cut through the rising tension.

"Good idea, Jules. That sound okay, Mom? You can't go wrong with Rory and books," Lorelai said in a sing-song voice, smiling enticingly at their mother.

Emily gave her oldest a tight smile and nodded. "Fine."

The three women walked the short distance from Damion's to Barnes & Noble, and separated almost immediately; Emily gravitating toward the history section, while Lorelai led Juliet over to the display of iBooks.

"See if they have it in blue," Lorelai instructed, looping her arm through Juliet's, then giggled at the display that held nothing but blue computers. "Never mind."

Lorelai grabbed the closest one and turned back around, searching the crowded bookstore. "Where'd Mom go?"

"I'm not sure," Juliet said, frowning. "Hey, Rory hasn't read Parable of the Talents yet, right?"

Lorelai shook her head. "No, not yet. But she loved Parable of the Sower, so that's a good idea."

After Juliet grabbed a copy of Parable of the Talents, they found Emily in the display of historical romance novels, studying the back of Julia Quinn's The Duke and I. She looked up, a faint blush tinting her cheeks when she saw her daughters in front of her.

"Uh, Mom," Lorelai began hesitantly, "you're not getting that for Rory, are you? I'm just – I'm not sure it's her thing."

Emily huffed. "No, Lorelai, I am not getting this for Rory. One of the ladies in the DAR recommended it to me, so I figured I'd read it for myself."

"Well – Mom," Juliet warned, exchanging an uncomfortable look with Lorelai. "You know it's kind of . . . suggestive, right? From what I've heard."

"Yes, well, I'm a person too, Juliet," Emily said tightly, avoiding her daughter's eyes as her cheeks turned an even deeper pink. She exhaled, holding up a biography of Anne Boleyn. "Do you think Rory would like this?"

Lorelai nodded vigorously. "That's really good."

"Are you sure?" Emily asked, frowning at the price tag. "It's only twelve dollars."

"It's perfect, Mom," Juliet reassured her. "Rory loves Anne Boleyn."

Emily's eyebrows lifted, a small smile appearing on her face. "Really?"

"Oh yeah," Lorelai laughed. "Ever since she saw Genevieve Bujold's hair in Anne of the Thousand Days, she was hooked."

Emily's smile faded. "The costumes in that film were wildly inaccurate."

"Well then, this'll help her see the light," Lorelai said wryly, tapping the book's cover. "Come on, let's check out."

Emily walked toward the checkout counter, and her daughters followed after a moment.

"Mom's buying porn!" Lorelai whispered in Juliet's ear with a chortle.

"Shhh!" Juliet shushed her, trying to contain her own horrified giggle. "Try not to think about it!"

"I can't believe Mom didn't buy you a poofy dress!" Lorelai complained on the phone later that night.

Juliet raised an eyebrow, even though her sister couldn't see her. "Really? You want a third dress to turn into something that doesn't resemble a cupcake?"

"I guess not," Lorelai allowed, and Juliet could hear the whirring of her sewing machine over the phone. "I will say that this whole 'revamping my dress for the ball' thing is totally making me feel like Cinderella. All I need is a pair of glass slippers. And a prince, I guess."

"Or a duke," Juliet added, snickering.

"Gah!" Lorelai cried. "I thought we agreed never to speak of that!"

"Oh Simon," Juliet swooned in an awful British accent. "Marry me so my brother doesn't kill you!"

They both giggled, still slightly scarred by the reminder that their mother was just as much of a woman as Shania Twain.

"Oh, hey, speaking of proposals . . ." Lorelai began.

Juliet furrowed her brow. "We weren't talking about proposals."

"Marriage, proposals. Same category," Lorelai argued dismissively.

"Okaay," Juliet allowed, shrugging. "What about proposals?"

"Luke . . kind of proposed to me."

Juliet, who had been lying on her couch, sat up straight. "Whoa, that was fast!"

"As a joke!" Lorelai added hastily. "He was joking!"

"Wow, I can't believe it," Juliet said, shaking her head in mock wonder. "I'm finally getting a big brother!"

"It was a joke, Jules," Lorelai repeated, her tone exasperated.

"More like a Freudian slip," Juliet said under her breath.

Lorelai sighed. "Okay, new topic, please?"

"So when's the wedding?" Juliet continued teasingly. "I'm your maid of honor, right? And Rory might be a little old to be a flower girl, but I think we could talk her into it."

"Jules," Lorelai pleaded.

"Okay, sorry," Juliet backed off. "New topic."

"Thank God. So, are you gonna call Maaaax?" Lorelai sang, her tone so smug that Juliet could see her smirk over the phone.

"I don't know," Juliet sighed, picking at a piece of lint on her sweatpants. "I mean, I'm not blind. He's an attractive guy. And he's charming and everything, but I just . . ."

"You just?" Lorelai prodded, her tone compassionate.

Juliet bit the inside of her cheek. "I just don't think he likes me, you know?"

"Not this again," Lorelai groaned. "Of course he likes you! He asked you out, not me, didn't he?"

"And that flirty message he left on your answering machine a few weeks ago? Was that meant for me too?" Juliet asked sarcastically.

"He was being polite!" Lorelai protested, her voice high.

"Uh-huh," Juliet said skeptically.

Lorelai sighed. "Look, Jules. We could spend hours on the spinning teacup ride of 'Which one of us does Max actually want?' but he asked you out, okay? That's gotta count for something, huh?"

"I guess," Juliet allowed, exhaling shakily. "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Okay," Lorelai agreed softly. "And when you decide to go out with him –"

"If," Juliet corrected.

"If you decide to go out with him, we'll give Rory a heads-up."

"Sounds like a plan," Juliet nodded. She sat up straighter, shaking her head. "Okay, no more boy talk."

"Deal," Lorelai laughed. "Hey, how many different shades of red do you think I'll get if I give Mom the Bridgerton sequel for Christmas?"

"Hmmm," Juliet pretended to consider this. "Ten, plus the vein in the forehead."

"Ten? I'd guess fifteen, at least," Lorelai scoffed.

"Well, you'll have to give it to her and we'll see," Juliet said with a shrug. "Oh, hey, do you want me to bring anything to your house on Saturday? Wine, chips, ice?"

"Nope! We've got plenty of wine, Sookie's making all the food, and there's enough ice in my fridge to sink the Titanic. Just get your cute butt over here after Mom's party and help us set up," Lorelai said cheerily.

Juliet shook her head disbelievingly. "God, I can't believe Rory's sixteen. It feels like yesterday we were reading Cosmo in the waiting room while you were in labor."

"And you were completely swallowed by the scrubs they gave you," Lorelai giggled.

"You'd think they'd have more than one size!" Juliet griped, but she was laughing too.

"She grew up so fast," Lorelai lamented softly.

So did we, Juliet thought.

Notes:

I'm breaking this chapter into two parts lol. Also, The Duke and I was published in January of 2000, while The Viscount Who Loved Me came out in December of the same year. I hope it didn't come off like I was making fun of Bridgerton in a malicious way, because I love those books so much, and I'm SO excited for Season 3 to come out on Netflix. Let me know what you think!