Tales from the Temple

Chapter 11: Grief

Anakin strolled the huge corridors of the Temple with angry strides. He was enraged, fury clouding his whole aura, making even the most seasoned Jedi scurry from his path. His determined steps were not fueled by a clear destination but by the conviction that he would avenge Obi-Wan's death. Rakko Hardeen would pay for taking his brother from him.

His determination faltered, though, when he realized where his subconscious had led him.

He was standing in front of Obi-Wan's quarters.

His rage evaporated in an instant, and heavy sadness settled on his whole being.

Tears clouded his vision as he punched the familiar code into the panel, and the door swooshed open to the darkness behind. With a deep breath, he entered and took in the familiar surroundings, hoping to find solace but only encountering aching emptiness.

He grew up in these quarters and kept coming back when everything got too much. But it'd never been about the place, he realized, standing in the darkened room, but about Obi-Wan's welcoming smile, his exasperated eye-rolls, and annoyed yet affectionate scoffs. About their shared laughter.

It was all empty now... except for a silhouette by the window.

On instinct, he reached for his lightsaber before realizing that he knew that silhouette, the unmistakable montrals recognizable anywhere. Master Ti.

She didn't move, eyes fixed on the night traffic of Coruscant, her Jedi robe wrapped around her shoulders. However, she must have been aware of his presence even before he entered the room. Anakin was stunned for a moment, arm falling next to his body. What was she doing there?

"I was seeking solace in his lingering presence," Master Ti's gentle voice rang out in the silence, answering his unvoiced question. "As you are, Anakin." She turned her head slightly, though her body remained facing the Coruscant night.

"Did you find it?" Anakin asked, walking up to her. In the city's artificial light, Anakin realized that it wasn't her robe around her shoulders but Obi-Wan's favorite blanket, the one he always used when he was reading. The one that was as old as his first memory of the man. Master Ti must have noticed him staring at the blanket as she shifted slightly, unwrapping it from her shoulders and gently wrapping it up as if it had been the most precious thing in the galaxy. She looked at it for a long time before offering it to him.

"I am still searching," she said in a voice laced with sadness that was alien to her usually serene demeanor. Anakin looked at the blanket, then at her face, and he recognized his own loss and grief on her shadowed features. The knowledge that they shared the same grief hit him in the chest. His eyes stung again as he reached for the blanket. Feeling empty, her arms wrapped around her slender torso.

"I miss him, Master." His voice was shaking as he admitted. "He was so much more than a master to me."

"As he was to me," she acknowledged with a sad smile, reinforcing which Anakin had been suspected. "But Anakin," She stepped closer and touched his cheek. Anakin looked at her. "We have to learn to let go." Anakin looked taken aback, but Master Ti only smiled. "We must remember him fondly and hold those memories close. But we have to accept that he is gone. You understand me, Anakin?"

After a long silence, Anakin nodded. Satisfied with his answer, Master Ti dropped her hand from his cheek and looked down at the blanket in his hands. Anakin followed her gaze and smiled.

"I remember this blanket."

"I was still a knight when I crocheted this," she told him with a sad, reminiscing smile as she ran her fingers over the old blanket. "Togrutas are known for their artisanship. I'm afraid I am not particularly gifted," she chuckled, looking at the funny-shaped blanket with the missed stitches.

"He's always loved this blanket. Now, I know why." He held onto it just a little bit tighter. "I can still feel him, Master Ti. It's as if our bond hadn't been completely severed."

For a moment, she looked confused. Anakin guessed she felt the same. After all, she and Obi-Wan must have shared a bond, too. But the look was gone as quickly as it came, and her features cleared. She was right; it was not possible. Obi-Wan was gone, and with him, his comforting presence in the Force.

"I believe," she started, "that sometimes, those we love remain with us. He may not be here physically, but his presence lingers," she told him, gently lifting his arms and pressing the blanket against his chest.

In the quiet moment they shared, Anakin couldn't help but think that it was a comforting thought.

THE END

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