fear the Dead, Fight the Living
A/N: Just a heads up I am skipping the episode after that last one just so no one's lost.
We walked for days after the events that just happened, we lost Beth and then we lost Tyreese. Daryl was hurting and I could see it, he didn't talk to me or look at me, he wasn't mad at me or anything he just shut himself down. We were tired, hungry, only had a little bit of water left that we took it easy on. We had a long ways to go still, but we held on, we always will
"We're out, just like the other one." Abraham says as the last car we found sputtered then dies
"So we walk." Rick tells us and we get out continuing our journey. We look back and see a small herd of walkers way behind us, "We're not at our strongest. We'll get 'em when it's best." Rick says to Daryl as they walk in front of me and my mom with the others behind us, "High ground, something like that. They're not going anywhere. It's been three weeks since Atlanta. I know you lost something back there." He tells him and I looked at Daryl then my mom held my hand, I gave her a sad smile then Judith fusses
"She's hungry."
"She's okay. She's going to be okay." Rick tells him
"We need to find water, food."
"We'll hit something in the road. It's gonna rain sooner or later." Rick points out
"I'm gonna head out. See what I can find." Daryl tells him and started to walk away
"Hey, don't be too long." Rick told him and my mom squeezed my hand
"I'll go with you." She says walking towards him
"I got it."
"You gonna stop me?" She asked and they headed off and I reached my hands out for Judith so he didn't have to carry so much and he handed her to me
Daryl POV...
"Anything?" Carol asked me while we walked through tall grass
"No, it's too dry. There ain't nothing here."
"Maybe we should start back." She says
"You go."
"I think she saved my life." Carol told me, "She saved your life, too, right?" She asked and handed me a knife, "It was hers. We're not dead. That's what you said. You're not dead. I know you. We're different. I can't let myself- But you... I know you. You have to let yourself feel it. You will." She said then kissed my head, "Just do me a favor, don't shut Phoebe out, okay? She needs you, more then you know and you need her."
Phoebe POV...
We stand at a small bridge getting ready for the walkers as they get closer, we didn't want to use to much of our strength so we just decided to let them fall down the hill, I pushed one down and slipped but Glenn caught me and I nodded my head at him when suddenly Sasha breaks away, "Stay in line." Rick told us grabbing his machete out and I grabbed my knife as she holds onto a walker then stabbed it, "Flank her. Keep it controlled." Rick says
"Plan just got dicked." Abraham pointed out as we continued to kill walkers, then as I turned around and killed one another one grabbed me then I feel it get pulled off and Daryl kills it, I catch my breath and look at him then looked over at Michonne and Sasha and followed them as they walk away.
"Dad, look." Carl says and we see a couple cars up ahead
"I'm gonna head into the woods, circle back." Daryl says
"May I come with?" I asked him
"No. No, just me." He says and walked away, I sighed and feel my mom's hand on my shoulder but I moved away walking with the others as we search the cars but didn't really find anything.
We took a break sitting on the side of the road when we hear branches snap, I looked up grabbing my knife then saw Daryl walk out, I put my knife back and and leaned my head against the tree
"So all we found was booze?" Tara asked
"Yeah." Rosita answered and I see Abraham take a drink of whiskey
"It's not gonna help." Tara pointed out to her
"He knows that."
"It's gonna make it worse." She adds
"Yes, it is."
"He's a grown man. And I truly do not know if things can get worse." Eugene says
"They can." Rosita says
Just then we hear rustling and growling as 4 dogs walked out of the woods, I grabbed my knife as they stood there growling at us then I hear silenced gunshots as Sasha shoots them. Then we sat there and cooked them, it felt wrong but we needed it, I sat there looking at the flames when my mom came over and handed me a bottle of water.
"Give it to Daryl" I tell her looking back at the fire
"He told me to come give it to you" She says and I look at her then glance at Daryl who looked away, I grabbed it taking a small sip then handed it to her, "It's gonna be ok" She tells me and I just looked forward
"I'm just happy I didn't lose you too" I tell her and she pulled me into a side hug and I rested my head on her shoulder.
As we continued walking I hear rustling behind me and I looked to see Daryl walking away, I looked at Abraham and he held up his hand telling me he went looking for water, I nodded my head then looked back forward, I just needed to let him heal, then maybe he'll come back to me.
We stopped walking when we saw a bunch of bottles of water sitting in the road, Daryl came back and Rick handed him the note, from a friend, it said.
"What else are we gonna do?" Tara asked
"Not this. We don't know who left it." Rick tells her
"If that's a trap, we already happen to be in it. But I, for one, would like to think it is indeed from a friend." Eugene says
"What if it isn't? They put something in it?" My mom asked and Eugen bent down grabbing one
"Eugene." Rosita says
"What are you doing, dude?" Tara asked him
"Quality assurance." He says and before he could take a drink Abraham smacked it out of his hand
"We can't." Rick tells him then we hear thunder and shortly after it rains, I look up and smile with joy because man it feels good, I look over at Daryl, Maggie then Sasha as they just stand there, "Everybody get the bags. Anything you can find." Rick tells us and I reached into mine grabbing out my water bottle then walked over to Daryl reaching my hand out for his and he handed it to me and I turned away filling it up then the rains increased, "Let's keep moving." Rick says
"There's a barn." Daryl told him
"Where?"
We follow Daryl through the woods coming up on the barn, Rick opened the door and we walked inside looking around while the others waited then we let them in.
That night as we waited out the storm I sat away from everyone playing with some hay when Daryl sits down next to me, I looked at him then back at what I was doing. He grabbed my hand and I looked at him again, "I'm sorry."
"For what?" I asked him
"I shut down, shut you out"
I turned and faced him putting my hand on his face making him look at me, "Don't be sorry, you needed the time so I gave it to you."
He put his hand on mine and sniffled, "I need you, I need you to pull me back"
"I will always pull you back, you're my home Daryl, let me be yours" I tell him and he kissed me
"You've always been mine" He says and I kissed him again then he pulled me into a hug
"For better or worse, remember that" I tell him and he nodded, I smiled as we hugged, he wasn't fully there, but it was progress. He pulled away and I held his hand then noticed a burn mark, "What's this?"
"I needed to feel" He said and I fought back tears as I lifted his hand up and kissed the burn
"Did you feel that?" I asked him
"I always feel you, even when I'm not with you, that's how I knew you were still alive" He tells me and I smile, "I mean it, Phoebe I don't ever wanna go through the pain of losing you, it might just be what kills me. I love you more then you know and you filled every empty part of my heart with the love you have for me."
"That's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me" I tell him through happy tears
"I mean every word, I'm gonna show you each day how much you mean to me."
"Just you being here with me is enough baby, all I need is you, it's all I've ever needed" I tell him and he hugged me kissing my head
"You're to perfect for me"
"Oh hush" I giggled and looked over at my mom who smiled at us.
We moved over to the others and Daryl tried to keep the fire we started going but he sat back down wrapping his arm around my shoulder and I leaned my head on his shoulder, "I'll try." Glenn told him
"No, too wet."
"He's gonna be okay." my mom tells Rick as I see him look at Carl who's asleep next to Rick cuddling with Judith, what I wouldn't give for a camera right now, "He bounces back more than any of us do."
"I used to feel sorry for kids that have to grow up now. In this. But I think I got it wrong. Growing up is getting used to the world. This is easier for them."
"This isn't the world. This isn't it." Michonne told him
"It might be. It might." Glenn tells her
"That's giving up."
"It's reality. Until we see otherwise, this is what we have to live with. When I was a kid... I asked my grandpa once if he ever killed any Germans in the war. He wouldn't answer. He said that was grown-up stuff, so... so I asked if the Germans ever tried to kill him. But he got real quiet. He said he was dead the minute he stepped into enemy territory. Every day he woke up and told himself, "Rest in peace. Now get up and go to war." And then after a few years of pretending he was dead... he made it out alive. That's the trick of it, I think. We do what we need to do and then we get to live. But no matter what we find in DC, I know we'll be okay. Because this is how we survive. We tell ourselves... that we are the walking dead."
"We ain't them." Daryl says after a moment then got up again trying the twigs again
"We're not them" Rick says to him, "Hey. We're not"
Daryl stood up, "We ain't them" He says and reached his hand down to me, I grabbed it standing up too, he grabbed his crossbow and we walked over to a horse stall and we sat down, "You should sleep" He tells me
"Lay with me" I tell him and he set his crossbow down then laid down with me and I eventually fall asleep. I got woken up by a loud thunder crack and noticed Daryl wasn't next to me, I got up and walked out of the stable and saw him bracing himself against the door, I ran over and leaned on it too hearing walkers then everyone else came over to help as the storm and wind increased, I looked at Daryl then kept pushing on it.
Daryl POV...
I sat next to the hay bail me and Phoebe were at, she was sleeping with her head in my lap and I watched her until Maggie came over sitting next to me, "You should get some sleep." She told me
"Yeah."
"It's okay to rest now." She says and I looked over at Sasha
"He was tough." I told Maggie
"He was."
"So was she." I said talking about Beth, "She didn't know it, but she was." I reassured her and she smiled at me then looked away, I grabbed the music box and handed it to her, "The gearbox had some grit in it."
"Thank you." She said and got up walking over to Sasha, I took off my vest and slowly lifted Phoebe's head off my lap, she shifted opening her eyes briefly as I laid down and she cuddled into me. I meant every word I told her last night, I'll always show her how much I love her and what she means to me. She's my everything
Phoebe POV...
The next morning after we all woke up I sat on the floor by Rick playing with Judith while Daryl fussed with his crossbow, "Hey." Maggie called from outside the door slowly pushing it open and I see her and Sasha walk in with a random guy, "Everyone... This is Aaron." She says and I stand in front of Judith as we raised our guns at him and Rick picked her up, "We met him outside. He's by himself. We took his weapons and we took his gear." She says and Daryl moved to the door looking outside then patted Aaron down
"Hi." Aaron says to us and Judith cries, Rick handed her to Carl, "It's nice to meet you." Aaron says moving forward but I moved up still pointing my gun and he stopped
"You said he had a weapon?" Rick asked Maggie and she walked over handing Rick the gun, a small gun, Rick tucked it in his pants, "There something you need?" He asked Aaron
"He has a camp, nearby. He wants us to audition for membership." Sasha says
"I wish there was another word. Audition makes it sound like we're some kind of a dance troupe. That's only on Friday nights." he joked but we all looked at him, "Um, and it's not a camp. It's a community. I think you all would make valuable additions. But it's not my call. My job is to convince you all to follow me back home. I know. If I were you, I wouldn't go either. Not until I knew exactly what I was getting into. Sasha, can you hand Rick my pack?" He asked her and she brings it over to him, "Front pocket, there's an envelope. There's no way I could convince you to come with me just by talking about our community. That's why I brought those. I apologize in advance for the picture quality. We just found an old camera store last..."
"Nobody gives a shit." Daryl tells him and I looked at him
"You're absolutely 100% right. That's the first picture I wanted to show you because nothing I say about our community will matter unless you know you'll be safe. If you join us, you will be. Each panel in that wall is a 15-foot-high, 12-foot-wide slab of solid steel framed by cold-rolled steel beams and square tubing. Nothing alive or dead gets through that without our say-so." He informed us and Rick handed me the pictures, I looked at them and to be honest it sounded to good to be true, "Like I said, security is obviously important. In fact, there's only one resource more critical to our community's survival. The people. Together we're strong. You can make us even stronger. The next picture, you'll see inside the gates. Our community was first construc..." He got cut off when Rick walked up to him punching him in the face knocking Aaron out
"So we're clear, that look wasn't a "let's attack that man" look. It was a "he seems like an okay guy to me" look." Michonne says to Rick
"We got to secure him. Dump his pack. Let's see what this guy really is." He told us
"Rick."
"Everybody else, we need eyes in every direction. They're coming for us. We might not know how or when, but they are." Rick told us and I looked at him
"Me and Sasha, we didn't see him. If he had wanted to hurt us, he could've." Maggie says
"Anybody see anything?" Rick asked us ignoring her
"Just a lot of places to hide." Glenn says
"All right, keep looking." He tells everyone and walked over to me while I looked through Aaron's bag, "What did you find?" He asked me and I handed him the flare gun, he nodded then walked back over to Aaron as he regained consciousness
That's a hell of a right cross there, Rick."
"Sit him up." Rick says to Maggie
"I think it's better if..."
"It's okay." Aaron tells her
"He's fine. Sit him up." Rick said again and Michonne sat him up
"You're being cautious. I completely understand." Aaron tells him
"How many of your people are out there? You have a flare gun. You have it to signal your people. How many of them are there?"
"Does it matter?" Aaron asked him
"Yes. Yes, it does."
"I mean, of course, it matters how many people are actually out there, but does it matter how many people I tell you are out there? Because I'm pretty sure no matter what number I say... eight, 32, 444, zero... No matter what I say, you're not going to trust me." Aaron says
"Well, it's hard to trust anyone who smiles after getting punched in the face." I tell him
"How about a guy who leaves bottles of water for you in the road?"
"How long you people been following us?" Daryl asked him moving up next to me
"Long enough to see that you practically ignore a pack of roamers on your trail. Long enough to see that despite a lack of food and water, you never turned on each other. You're survivors and you're people. Like I said, and I hope you won't punch me for saying it again, that is the most important resource in the world."
"How many others are out there?" Rick asked him again
"One." Aaron tells him and Rick lightly shook his head, "I knew you wouldn't believe me. If it's not words, if it's not pictures, what would it take to convince you that this is for real? What if I drove you to the community? All of you. We leave now, we'll get there by lunch."
"I'm not sure how the 16 of us are going to fit in the car you and your one friend drove down here in." Rick mentioned to him
"We drove separately. If we found a group, we wanted to be able to bring them all home. There's enough room for all of us."
"And you're parked just a couple miles away, right?" I asked him
"East on Ridge Road, just after you hit Route 16. We wanted to get them closer, but then the storm came, blocked the road. We couldn't clear it."
"Yeah, you've really thought this through." Rick told him
"Rick, if I wanted to ambush you, I'd do it here. You know, light the barn on fire while you slept, pick you off as you ran out the only exit. You can trust me."
"I'll check out the cars." Michonne told Rick
"There aren't any cars."
"There's only one way to find out." She adds
"We don't need to find out."
"We do. You know what you know and you're sure of it, but I'm not." She pointed out
"Me neither" Maggie added
"Your way is dangerous, mine isn't." Rick told Michonne
"Passing up someplace where we can live? Where Judith can live? That's pretty dangerous. We need to find out what this is. We can handle ourselves. So that's what we're gonna do."
"Then I will, too." Glenn agreed
"Abraham." Rick calls to him
"Yeah. I'll walk with them."
"Rosita?" He asked
"Okay."
"If there's trouble, you got enough firepower?" Rick asked Glenn
"We got what we got."
"The walkies are out of juice. If you're not back in 60 minutes, we'll come." I told them as they start to head out
"Which might be just what they want." Rick says, "If we're all in here, we're a target."
"We've got the area covered." Daryl tells him and nudged me to go with him and the rest of them
"All right, groups of two, find somewhere safe within eye shot."
"This, this is ours now." Rick says to Aaron as we look at he food
"There's more than enough."
"It's ours whether or not we go to your camp." Rick pointed out
"What do you mean? Why wouldn't we go?" Carl asked him
"If he were lying or if he wanted to hurt us... but he isn't, and he doesn't. We need this. So we're going, all of us. Somebody say something if they feel differently." Michonne defended and I looked at Daryl
"I don't know, man. This barn smells like horse shit." Daryl says and I put my hand on his shoulder
"Yeah. We're going." Rick finally said and I smiled at him, "So where are we going? Where's your camp?" Rick asked Aaron
"Well, every time I've done this, I've been behind the wheel driving recruits back. I believe you're good people. I've bet my life on it. I'm just not ready to bet my friends' lives just yet."
"You're not driving. So if you want to get home, you'll have to tell us how." Michonne tells him
"Go north on Route 16."
"And then?" She asked
"I'll tell you when we get there."
"We'll take 23 north. You'll give us directions from there." Rick told him
"That's... I don't know how else to say it... That's a bad idea. We've cleared 16. It'll be faster."
"We'll take 23. We leave at sundown." Rick persisted
"We're doing this at night?" Sasha asked him
"Look, I know it's dangerous. But it's better than riding up to the gates during the day. If it isn't safe, we need to get gone before they know we're there."
"No one is going to hurt you. You're trying to protect your group, but you're putting them in danger." Aaron says to Rick
"Tell me where the camp is, we'll leave right now." Rick tells him but Aaron stayed quiet, "It's going to be a long night. Eat. Get some rest if you can" Rick said to us and I nudged Daryl to follow me and we walked outside
"What are your thoughts on this?" I asked him
"I don't know. Sounds to good to be true" He says and I nodded then looked down but he lifted my chin so I would look at him, "But if it's a chance for us to survive, and I would know you're safe with a roof over your head then I'll do what it takes."
I smiled at him then kissed him, "I need you safe too Mr. Dixon" I tell him and he kissed me again
"Then maybe we can start trying to work on that family again, Mrs. Dixon" I smiled as he pulled me into a hug, I never would have thought that this rough and tough man would be so willing to want a family but he is and I loved it. Problem is we tried for months at the prison and I never got pregnant, I kind of began to doubt if I even could have children.
That night I sat in the RV as we followed the others, I was in the back sitting on the bed when my mom walked up to me, "Penny for your thoughts?"
I looked up at her and smiled as she sat next to me, "Just thinking"
"About what?"
"If this is real, are we really gonna have a place to go? Or is it a pipe dream?" I asked and she grabbed my hand
"Something tells me that's not the only thing on your mind"
I sighed and looked down, "When you um...when you wanted to have me, and Sophia, was it hard for you to...get pregnant with us?"
I looked up at her and saw her look at Daryl then me again, "At first. I never told you this but before I got pregnant with you I miscarried another baby" She told me and I looked at her, "But yes when we tried not only for that one but for you as well it was hard. How long were you and Daryl trying for?"
"We started after we got the people from Woodbury settled in" I tell her and she grabbed my hand
"That doesn't mean anything is wrong, with you or with Daryl, it could just take time. Rome wasn't built in a day."
I chuckled at her and gave her a hug, "Thank you mom"
"Anytime sweetie"
"Shit!" We hear Abraham say from up front and I went up there followed by my mom
"What is it?" I asked but then I saw a bunch of walkers in the road and blood
"It looks like they drove right through it" Maggie says
"We can't stay here though, we need to double back" I point out
"And where do you suggest we go?" Abraham asked me
"I have an idea"
Me and Daryl stood outside a building we found after shooting the flare and finding the person Aaron was with, "They should have been here by now" I pointed out and Daryl grabbed my hand
"They will be" He says and I smiled at him, "In the meantime, wanna fool around?" He asked and I saw the smirk on his face
"You think you're funny?" I asked with a smile and he kissed my cheek
"Isn't that why you married me?"
"I married you because I love you, not your poor attempts at jokes" I tell him and he lightly shoved me then we hear footsteps approaching then a whistle, we look and saw Rick walking over with the others. Daryl whistled back and I knocked on the door to alert the others, I moved as the door opened then Maggie and Carl ran out first.
"Dad!" Carl yelled hugging him
"Is your sister ok?" Rick asked him
"Yeah"
"Eric? Eric?" Aaron asked then headed inside
"I see you got my message" I told Rick and he put his hand on my shoulder, "I knew it was risky but..."
"You acted on instinct. Thank you" He says and I nodded then we all headed back inside
"Excuse me. Excuse me. Everyone." Aaron says to us walking out of the room his friend was in, "Thank you. You saved Eric. I owe you. All of you. And I will make sure that debt is paid in full when we get to our community. When we get to Alexandria. Now, I'm not sure about you, but I'd rather not do any more driving tonight." He said we all gave a light chuckle, "Maybe we can hit the road tomorrow morning."
"That sounds fine. But if we're staying here for the night, you're sleeping over there." Rick told him
"You really think we got to do that?" I asked Rick
"It's the safe play. We don't know you." Rick told Aaron
"The only way you're gonna stop me from being with him right now is by shooting me." Aaron says and Rick stayed quiet then Aaron moved forward but Glenn stopped him
"Whoa. Rick, he told us where the camp is. And he really was only traveling with one other person. They're both unarmed. One of them's got a broken ankle. I want us to be safe, too. I can't give up everything else. I know what I said, but it does matter." Glenn told Rick who hesitated
"All right."
Daryl POV...
"Seven-card stud. Stares and squares. It's aces, cuatros, neeners, and two-eyed jacks." Eugene says to Phoebe, Tara and Glenn as we sat in the RV the next day.
"So there's 14 wild cards? Are you serious?" Tara asked him
"Serious as two copulating dogs."
"Ok completely inappropriate" Phoebe laughed and I looked over at her, it sure was nice to see her smile again. She looked over at me and gave me a wink and I smiled at her. This place better work, she needs it, they all need it. I want her to have a place to call home.
Phoebe POV...
"Can't win." Abraham says hitting the hod of the RV, "Might as well paint it red, put a ladder on it."
"All we need is another battery." Glenn told him
"Where in the hell are we gonna find another battery?"
"Right over here." Glenn says and they walked over to the side of the RV, Glenn lifted a small door inside by the steps
"How'd you know those were there?" Abraham asked him and me and Glenn looked at each other, I feel my heart twist in pain but I smiled
"An old friend" I tell him and Glenn gave my hand a squeeze then they finished fixing it up then it started, we all cheered and I see Rick walk into the woods. I thought about going after him but then Daryl came down from the RV and wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and kissed my cheek, I turned and smiled at him kissing him on the lips then Rick came back and we took off.
We pull up to a set of gates and I looked out the front, then we all got out walking towards them and I hear children laughing behind them, Daryl grabbed my hand and I looked at him. This was the start of something, for all of us, I could feel it.