A/N Thank you everyone :)
Daryl's at the door! We're going to step back just a little at the beginning of this chapter to see how Daryl got to this point.
Enjoy!
00
The big blacked-out motorcycle couldn't be running any smoother. It's a finely tuned machine any biker would be proud to own. And polished? Daryl keeps it looking like it just rolled off the showroom floor.
That doesn't mean he's not working on it.
The man derives a lot of pleasure from fiddling around with that damn bike, but that's not the reason he's got tools, shop rags and parts spread out on the shop floor today. Truth is, he's got the bike half taken apart because he needs to stay occupied, otherwise all he does is sit around and think about Beth.
Shit, all he does is sit around and think about her anyway. Fuck him.
He's trying though, trying to clear his head and trying not to think about Beth, so he goes about fixing things that don't need fixing. He's just about to wrap it up, put everything back together and get his tools put away when he hears it approaching. There's no mistaking the sound of his brother's tow truck when it pulls in the gate.
Daryl walks from the building, absentmindedly wiping his hands on a red shop rag, while Merle cuts the engine and steps down from the big work truck, "Hey little brother. I got a job in the neighborhood so I thought I'd go ahead n stop by, see what you're up to."
"Not much, just tryin' ta get the bike runnin' a little smoother."
"Shit kid, that ain't possible. I'd give my left nut ta have mine run half as good as yours, but enough bullshit, what's really going on?"
"Whaddya talkin' about? Ain't nuthin' goin' on."
He can protest all he wants, but Merle's never had to do more than take one long look at his younger brother to know whether he's in a good place or not. "Ya got trouble with that pretty little lady?"
"Fuck you, Merle."
"Oh shit, that's it, huh? I thought I was kiddin'. Fuck man, you two were all cuddled up the other night. What the hell went wrong?"
"Nuthin' went wrong. She just ain't my type and I ain't her type either."
Now Merle knows everything he needs to know, "Oh yeah? I guess I can see how that could be true. I had the same trouble with Amy cuz she ain't my type at all, she's the good type and I'm the no-good type. That's why I had ta force myself ta knock on her door. I knew I was nuthin' but a worthless piece a shit who never had, and never would, deserve anythin' good like her in my life. Yeah, that Amy, shit, she's the best, the sweetest and the prettiest and I just knew if I was ta knock on her door I'd be settin' us both up, me ta prove ta myself and the world that I'm the worst muther fucker walkin', and her ta be my brokenhearted victim," he snorts a humorless laugh adding, "But fuck me brother, I knocked anyway, and guess what? Her and me, we're going good. Still, every time I get ta her door I struggle with knockin' on it."
Daryl's stunned, his brother has never admitted this kind of heavy shit to him, and Merle never seems to have a problem coming on to the women. Of course, Merle's had a type, or at least what Daryl thought was his brother's type. Those loose and friendly barflies who enjoy a no-strings one night romance. All Daryl is able to respond is, "No shit."
Merle looks at his brother, shrugs slightly and asks, "Why ya think it's that way for you n me little brother, cuz I gotta tell ya, I think I figured it out. We was raised by the same asshole and he told us over n over again what worthless pieces a shit we are, how we'd never amount ta nuthin', how we ruined his life and the life of everyone we ever went around. It's pretty damn hard ta hear that shit every day n not start ta believe it, ain't it?"
Daryl's head is spinning, shit, he can't quite believe his brother's talking this way, and he's having trouble trying to absorb and process everything Merle just said, then his brother claps him on the shoulder and says, "All right then, that's about all the heart ta heart bullshit I can take for now. Time is money n I gotta get goin' kid, but you think about what I'm sayin', n think about whether ya wanna be a big pussy n prove the ol' man right, or you wanna be your own man n maybe see if you n that little sweetie can make a go of it."
Daryl's in a strange kind of spun up daze as he fixes himself a meal before work, showers and dresses. As he does what he does, he can imagine Beth there with him, her smiling face and the sweet softness about her. Shit, how could he have just walked away like he did? To make things even harder, his brothers words are playing over and over in his mind. Is it really that way? Is he letting that toxic bullshit his father spewed all those years ago come back and fuck his life up now?
Would she ever even be willing to talk to him again after the way he acted the other night? He couldn't blame her if she wouldn't.
Fuck him.
He's behind the bar and going through all the appropriate motions. Pouring shots, drawing beers and hollering to the guys at the dartboard to "quit aimin' them things at each other, dumbasses!"
While he's busy with all that, he's also trying to convince himself to go see her. He's off Saturday, Jesus needed a little extra cash, asked for a shift, and Daryl was good with giving one up. He decided to take that day off and get away from all this bullshit. The plan was to take himself up in the mountains to do some serious cold-water fishing and reset his brain.
Maybe he should make a new plan like maybe call Beth and ask if she'd see him.
The whole "maybe I'll call her" plan blows up when Merle comes walking in Dirty Dixon's about eight. He's got an arm wrapped across Amy's shoulder, holding her close and Daryl notices that, shit, the couple does look happy as they say their hellos to Abraham and Rosita, then walk up to the bar where Daryl asks, "Hey Amy, Merle, what can I get ya ta drink?"
Merle looks like the happy cat who ate the canary, but he keeps his voice low and serious. What he has to say is only intended for Daryl's ears, "I got holda Jesus n he'll be pullin' in here any minute now. He's gonna work the rest a your shift for ya tonight so you can go visit the little lady. Even if ya don't do nuthin' else brother, ya owe that woman an apology."
Amy's nervous, she doesn't know Daryl at all, not really, but he's the one who hurt her best friend and she just has to say something, "Merle's right Daryl. You were mean to Beth, and you need to tell her you're sorry."
Fuck him, those words coming from this young woman hit him harder than anything Merle could say. He knows he's been a supreme asshole, and he owes Beth an apology even if she kicks his ass out the door for good. He hurt her, hell, he hurt himself, but his feelings don't matter right now. He doesn't overthink it, he's tired of feeling like shit, "Yeah, I know. I'll leave as soon as Jesus gets here," and as if on cue, in walks Jesus.
00
"Let me in Baby, please."
Beth takes in a breath so deep she's sure she can feel the oxygen all the way down to her toes, then closes her eyes and says a quick prayer for strength before slowly opening the door. Not all the way, just enough for her to peek her face out and ask, in as disinterested a tone as she's able to muster, "What do you want Daryl?"
He made up his mind on the short ride over, no matter how angry she is, no matter what kind of names she might call him, and no matter how shitty she treats him, he's got it coming and he'll take what she dishes out. "I just wanna talk Baby, I just wanna tell ya how sorry I am. I know I been a dick."
She has no reason to be afraid of this man, and he's seen her in a lot less than her jammies, and besides, she doesn't want the neighbors listening in on her business, so she offers, "Well let's not talk like that out here, come in."
She opens the door just wide enough for him to get through it, and as soon as it closes behind him he begins raising his arms to take her in a hug. Damn, he's been aching to hold her, but Beth takes a step back, "No Daryl, I'm not falling back into that trap with you."
He's instantly hurt and offended, and he almost barks back, but he catches himself and asks, "Whaddya mean? What trap?"
"The trap where you act all affectionate and loving long enough to convince me we really have something, and that you care, and then you turn your back on me like I've never meant anything to you and I never will. You know, that trap."
He's hating himself because she's right, he did that shit to her. Treated her that way. He's chewing his bottom lip while absentmindedly nodding his head, and he admits, "Yeah, I know what I done. I been wrong, and the strangest thing about that is, how fuckin' much I do care about you Beth. What a fuckin' idiot I am. Shit Baby, you're all I think about day n night."
He steps closer, but doesn't attempt to touch. He's fucked everything up with her twice and he's desperate for her to give him one more chance. If he wants that, he can't hold back, he can't be his usual non-communicative self. "I cared about ya from the minute I first seen ya. Ya had ta feel it. I don't know though, I…I never been all hung up on someone like I am with you, and the thing is Baby, and this ain't bullshit either, sumthin' Merle said made it clear, I don't think I deserve ya. You're too good a person to get all tangled up with someone like me." Then he really lays out some truth, "Shit, n maybe I'm a little scared too."
"What do you mean you're scared? Scared of me? Scared of commitment? Scared of what?"
He's got to make her understand, he's got to honest, and he's got to state his case, "More like I'm scared of how I feel about ya, like I care too much n like if I let myself get all sucked in we'll be happy, then sumthin' bad will happen n I'll lose ya. I don't know what I'd do with that kinda hurt."
She looks right in his eyes and states the simple truth, "Daryl, when you care about people hurt is kind of part of the package." Her eyes cast down when she adds, "I guess you have to decide if you want it bad enough to take that chance."
Yeah dumbass, or if you're just a big pussy. "You're right. I ain't here ta be a crybaby about me n my feelins. I'm here ta tell ya how sorry I am. I'm here askin' ya to forgive me. I'm here ta ask ya for one more chance ta prove I can be a stand-up guy. Lemme wine ya and dine ya and whatever else I gotta do ta prove it. Whatever ya want Beth, I promise I'll work ta earn it."
Beth's head and her heart are having a battle. Her heart wants this man, never has she desired another human the way she desires him, but her head keeps reminding her, this guy has flaked out on you twice in like a week and a half. Why the heck would you trust him? Why would you set yourself up to be hurt again?
It's a good time to try and lighten the mood just a little, "I know you don't care for my furnishings, but let's sit."
He's smirking, "Hey now, it ain't that I don't like em, I just never seen anythin' so…shit, I dunno, so girly. You seen what my place looks like."
"Daryl, I like pretty things. I love flowers, is that wrong?"
"Nah, nah, and I never meant ta act like it is. I was dumb, it's just, all this, it's just another thing that proves how different we are."
She lets out a frustrated little sigh and notes, "We're supposed to be different Daryl, you're a man and I'm a woman, and don't call yourself dumb. Whoever taught you to think that was wrong. Now I'm going to sit down, you can keep standing there all night if you want to."
He likes this feisty side of her, and he smiles, "Okay, I'll sit my ass down and you tell me how it's gonna be."
Her brow is furrowed and Daryl can tell the thoughts are running through her mind just like they've been running through his, then she speaks, "I want to say I'll give you another chance because I really do care for you Daryl, but how can I put myself through this stuff again? Do you realize I ate half a half-gallon carton of ice cream tonight? Not to mention a dozen or so Oreos? I can't live that way. I need to know I can count on you."
He's been confused many times in his life, but never quite this confused, "I don't get it, I mean the part about the ice cream n cookies." What does that have to do with anything?
"Amy called when I got home from work today, and when I told her what was happening and how sad I was she had Merle bring her over here, and she brought a half gallon of rocky road ice cream and Oreos for me to drown my sorrows in. I ate and cried and told her everything. Merle was at the café having his dinner all alone, poor guy."
He's a little intrigued by her story, "Merle's fine. Did ya feel better after ya done that, ate ice cream and cookies?"
"Yes."
"You're a lot smarter'n me. Shit, I shoulda tried that instead a what I did. I drank a bottle a whiskey that night I left here, it took me two days ta get right."
They both have a laugh over that, and it helps to ease their nerves, but then Daryl becomes very serious and promises, "I wouldn't ever do that again, ya know, act like I acted n walk out on ya that way, no matter how sad, mad or scared I get. I won't do it. Ya got my word. I wasn't bein' a man Beth, and there's nuthin' I want more than ta be a good man ta you Baby.
They're quiet for a moment as they both think about what he just said, and then Beth asks, "So what now? If I did take a chance and try this one more time, where do we go from here?"
He smiles, "Let's spend some time together, real time, havin' fun n talkin', but not about shit like this. More like, I dunno, gettin' ta know each other n whatnot. I'm off Saturday, how bout we go for a bike ride? Not city ridin' n stuff, we'll keep it mellow. We can head out in the country a little. We'll stop at this little place I know n have some slaw dawgs or chili burgers, whatever ya like. I'll take it real easy with the bike, be nice n safe. Ya want to?"
Two weeks ago she would have said never in this lifetime to an offer like that, but tonight she says, "I'd love to." She means it too. Maybe it's time she stretched her wings a little.
She yawns, and as much as he hates to, Daryl stands to go, "I better let ya get your rest. I know ya got an early day tomorrow."
She stands too, "Well at least it's Friday," then smiles and says, "What do I need to do to get ready for this ride?"
"Just be here when I get here, how about nine Saturday mornin', is that too early?"
"No, I'll be ready."
"Alright, you'll need your jacket and a helmet, we can stop and get ya the helmet before we leave town."
She has another idea, "There's a motorcycle dealer just a couple blocks over from my work. I could just stop there after work tomorrow and pick one up."
"I dunno, are ya sure? I could take ya Saturday mornin'."
"If I go get it after work tomorrow we won't be giving up any of our Saturday fun time."
He snorts a laugh and nods while he's digging in his pocket, and says, "Alright then," and hands her some bills, "Make sure ya talk ta someone who knows what they're doin' so ya get one that fits right and's comfortable. Don't worry about what it costs."
"Okay. Thank you."
He smiles at her and asks, "Before I go, ya think there's any way I could get that hug?"
She smiles back, "Yes, I think so."
Once his arms wrap around her he feels instant relief. He's happy, and feeling a whole lot better about life than he did when he first showed up. He makes a move to kiss her, and she lets him, then he promises, "I'll see ya Saturday mornin' at nine, and I'll be on time, k?"
"Yes, Im excited for this."
"Ya sure you're okay with goin' after that helmet yourself, we could just go get it when I get here."
"No, it'll be fine, and like I said, that way it won't cut into our day together."
He nods, smiles and says, "Yeah, good. All right then. I'll see ya Saturday." There's one more long deep kiss and he's gone.
That night is the first time in several nights both Daryl and Beth sleep well.
00
Even though the motorcycle dealer is just three blocks from work, Beth can't imagine walking back to her car with a big helmet in her hands, she drives over. She walks in the showroom, and my gosh, there's no denying how beautiful the wide array of bikes look. For such big, loud machines, they're very pretty. She's scanning the store when a woman about her age approaches, her name tag says, "Enid."
The woman smiles and asks Beth, "Hi, can I help you find something?"
"Um, yes please, I need a helmet. I was told to be sure and get something for street riding with a full face shield."
Enid nods, "Sure, that sounds perfect, the helmets are on the wall at the other side of the store. Let's have a look."
There are so many of them, but Beth quickly finds the one she likes and gives it a try. Enid points out that the size can easily be adjusted, and the inside lining removed and washed, "That will keep it nice and fresh, here, give it a try."
Within fifteen minutes Beth has settled on her new helmet, and she's smiling to herself wondering how Daryl will feel about the pink flames. She's startled from that thought when Enid suggests, "How are you fixed for riding clothes? We got some really cute gear in today, and you're built just right for the leather pants I just hung on that rack over there. Let me show you."
Not only are there skintight leather pants, and very sexy women's boots, there are also lots of ladies leather jackets, oh my gosh, and plenty of bustiers. She can't bring herself to do the bustier though, she's just too modest, but a black tank top, the leather pants, the leather jacket and a pair of boots, wow, she doesn't even look like herself.
She stands in the dressing room for several minutes, looking at her reflection in the mirror and debating what to do. Does she look hot? She's pretty darn sure she does. Phew, Mama and Daddy would faint. Does everything fit just right? Oh yes indeed it does. Does she think Daryl would like the look? Yes, its just the kind of thing the women at Dirty Dixon's would be wearing.
Daryl has said it about them many times, that they're very different people from very different worlds. She knows that concerns him. And last night he tried so hard to be accepting of her style, her flowers and "girly" things. Shouldn't she "give" a little too? Shouldn't she try fitting into his world a little?
It sure isn't cheap though, my gosh, $500.00. She'll have to put everything on a credit card, and then deny herself for the next few months so she can get it paid off. Gosh, she's never done anything like that, but that's okay, she's changing, right? She's compromising and he's compromising and that's good.
She pays for everything except the helmet on that shiny, almost new, credit card she's only used one other time.
He arrives at her place ten minutes early, that's okay though because Beth is ready. She has on her new skintight leather pants, her tight black tank top, sexy motorcycle boots, and her black leather jacket. Her new helmet is sitting on the little dining table.
He knocks and she opens the door and Beth could swear she sees his jaw drop and his eyebrows raise as he asks, "Whoa Baby, what's all this?"
Beth's all smiles and pink cheeks when she answers, "If I'm going to hang out with a biker I thought I should probably look the part."
He nods, "Uh huh? Well ya look hot as fuckin' fire, that ain't no lie." He nods, chews the side of his thumb and asks, "I got a question though, did ya buy all this cuz ya like it n ya wanted ta dress this way, or cuz ya think I'd like it?"
Honesty. She takes a breath and admits, "I would never wear this anywhere if you weren't with me, but you always talk about how different we are and I just thought you'd appreciate me fitting into your world a little better."
His arms begin to circle her and his hands come to rest on her hips, and he's honest with her, "I do appreciate it Baby, like I said, ya look hotter'n fire, but it ain't what I expect or even what I want. I'm like Beth Greene. I like the way she looks. I like the way she dresses. I like everythin' about her. This ain't her and I don't wanna change her."
"Oh. Oh…well thank God. I'll put on something else."
He's smiling a little now, yeah, he just knew it, that look is not what his girl is about. Wait, "his" girl? Maybe, hopefully, "Wait, before ya do, let's take one a them selfies," he's laughing and she'd laughing, and then they're kissing. He draws back and they do take a couple of selfies, and then he says, "I like that pink sweater ya wore the other night."
She smiles, "I like it too. The pink sweater it is then."
"I'll step outside while ya change, then we'll return all that stuff before we head out, ya probably spent a lot."
"Okay, if you're sure."
"I'm real sure. I like ya just like ya are." He kisses her one more time for emphasis, then shrugs and suggests, "Maybe just keep them boots. I'll buy."
00
A/N It looks like they've made up, and now they're going riding. Please leave a comment. There's a chapter photo on my tumblr blogs, gneebee and bethylmethbrick, complete with Beth's boots. Have a look. I'll be back next week for our ride in the country, I hope you'll be back too. Until then remember, I love ya large! xo gneebee