In the streets of Hell, a person was strolling along without attracting the attention of the locals.
The person in front of her was a young man who looked to be barely 20, with a normal build for a man his size. He was wearing a black Rocker suit with a white gothic floral brocade shirt. Over it all, he wore a black cloak with various white embroidered motifs, and a hood pulled up, concealing his face from the eyes of demons and sinners.
In his left hand, he held a sword as if it were a walking stick.
The sword was short, light and simple, similar to the Chinese Jian and housed in a red scabbard of more refined Western design. The scabbard was wrapped with a black ribbon, leaving some areas free, showing three shurikens embedded in it.
His walk lasted until he saw a TV inside a bar broadcasting some kind of newsflash, he looked out of a window and then saw a tall, slim demon girl with long blond hair and red eyes and cheeks, she was presenting a hotel for sinners to go to heaven, many laughed at her idea but the stranger didn't laugh, in fact, he considered her opinions noble. Then she began to sing.
(Insert Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow here.)
I have a dream,
I'm here to tell.
About a wonderful, fantastic new hotel
Yes it's one of a kind, right here in Hell
Catering to a specific clientele !
Inside of every demon is a rainbow,
Inside every sinner is a shiny smile!
Inside of every creepy hatchet-wielding maniac,
Is a jolly, happy, cupcake-loving child!
We can turn them 'round!
They'll be heaven-bound!
With just a little time down at the Happy Hotel!
So, all you junkies, freaks and weirdos,
Creepers, fuck-ups, crooks, and zeroes,
And downfallen superheroes, hope is here!
All of you cretins, sluts and losers,
Sexual deviants and boozers, and prescription drug abusers
Need not fear
Forever again
We'll cure your sin
We'll make you well, you'll feel so swell
Right here in Hell, at the
the Happy Hotel !
There'll be no more fire
And no more screams,
Just puppy dog kisses, and cotton candy dreams,
And puffy-wuffy clouds, you're gonna be like "Wow!"
Once you check in with meeeee~!
So, all your cartoon porn addictions,
Vegan rants, psychic predictions,
Ancient Roman crucifixions
End right here!
All you monsters, thieves and crazies,
Cannibals and crying babies,
Frothing mouth that's full of rabies,
Filled with cheer!
You'll be complete! It'll be so neat!
Our service can't be beat! You'll be on easy street! (Yes!)
Life will be sweet at the Happy Hotel~! YEAH !
He was touched by her song, finding it wonderful, while the demons laughed as he heard the presenter call her Charlie.
He wanted to meet her and help her.
Then he heard an explosion that snapped him out of his thoughts and he decided to check outside.
He arrived on the scene to see a one-eyed girl throwing bombs with a white guy with several arms holding a machine gun, they were fighting an army of eggs in suits with a cobra-like guy dressed like a mafia guy.
"Okay, this place just keeps getting weirder and weirder." Declaimed the stranger.
He then saw an egg coming towards him and he then hit it using his sword as if it were a golf club, the two parties got closer and there they saw the egg pass between them, they looked to the right and saw the stranger.
"Well, now, do you know me?" sighed the stranger.
"Who's that guy?" Asked the multi-armed demon, confused.
"So what have we here, another wannabe trying to take back this territory from Sir Pentious, well too bad." Says Sir Pentious, then pulls out a rocket launcher and fires it at the stranger.
The latter drew his sword and the shockwave from the cutting edge cut the rocket in two, which exploded, surprising all three of them and sending Sir Pentious fleeing to the other side of town.
"Boss." Said the eggs, and they chased after him.
"Well, that was interesting, but sorry, you still have to face Cherry Bomb." Cherry Bomb said as he threw a bomb at her, the stranger then jumped over and landed behind her, she turned but received a punch to the face, sending her against a wall. She got out and spat dirt. "Is this what you want to play bitch?"
"Leave it to me." Said the multi-armed demon before firing at him with the submachine gun but he dodged the bullets or intercepted them with ease with his sword have bounced off him, shocking him as he ran out of ammunition.
"Is that all?" Declared the stranger.
"Oh, you think that's crap. Come on Angel, let's get him." Cherri Bomb said before they charged at him. The stranger then began to dodge their attacks as a camera crew approached to film the battle.
Charlie was now fighting presenter Katie Killjoy in a bare-knuckle fight, then they saw the turn the battle with Cherri Bomb and Angel Dust was taking against the stranger and stopped.
"What, what's he doing?" Said Vaggie angrily at Angel Dust.
The stranger jumped over Angel Dust, landing a little further behind him.
He brandished his sword in the air, then spun it around to reveal a ring of energy that glowed brightly. The ring released pieces of armor that attached themselves to him, endowing him with golden armor and red eyes. The golden armor resembled a wolf with gaping fangs and an animal-like growl. This stranger was a Makai Knight known as the Golden Knight Garo.
"Well, now, this can be fun, Goldy." Angel Dust said with a smile.
"We'll see." Garo replied, throwing the sheath of his sword at Angel Dust, who failed to catch it and took it to the head. Ending up stunned by the impact.
Then he quickly grabbed a chain lying in the debris and with a simple throw, wrapped it around the spider demon, shocking everyone again.
Charlie then discarded Katie and looked at the screen to see Garo then fighting Cherri Bomb, he was now hitting her several times with his free fist or his sword in his sheath. It was clear to everyone watching that Garo's sole aim was to neutralize her.
The fact that he was obviously holding back angered her, taking it more as an insult than an act of charity.
She pulled out a large bomb and lit it.
"Take this."
She then threw it but he threw it back using his sword as a baseball bat, rendering her stunned as the bomb exploded in her face. She fell to the ground unconscious.
Garo then moved towards her and Angel Dust.
"That was interesting, but I won. declared the Golden Knight.
Angel Dust struggled to her feet and looked up at him.
"Who are you?"
"I am a Makai knight. The Golden Knight Garo." Garo replied as the pieces of his armor detached and disappeared, revealing the stranger whose hood was still up. "Andrew Ozawa."
"Okay... Now what?" Angel Dust said, confused.
Just then a limousine arrived and the back door opened to reveal Charlie and Vaggie.
"Get in here." Vaggie ordered.
"Okay." Said Angel Dust as he wriggled free of the chain before settling on the other side of the seats.
"Uh... do you want to come with us?" Charlie asked.
"Sure." Accepting Andrew before entering, he went to sit in a seat between the girls and Angel Dust, while the limousine resumed its journey.
He looked between the two groups with Charlie smiling at him while Vaggie glowered at him and Angel Dust while Angel Dust played with the window like a child.
"So why did you help me?" Andrew asked.
"Well, you kind of stopped Angel Dust from doing any more damage." Said Charlie.
"Oh yeah, it wasn't because you wanted to see him." Says Angel Dust.
"Would you shut up, you've already ruined the hotel's reputation with what you've done." Declared Vaggie.
"So, what's your name?" Chalie asked Andrew.
"Andrew Ozawa. Current holder of the title of Garo." The knight introduced himself.
"So, how did you do it?" Charlie asked.
"Do what?" Andrew declared.
"You know, all that stuff with your sword, and making that armor appear." Said Charlie.
"Oh, that, well, you might not believe." Said Andrew.
"Try me." Insisted Vaggie.
"Okay, why are you so mad at me?" Asked Andrew.
"She doesn't like men, plus she's jealous that her girlfriend wants to meet you." Said Angel Dust, which made her growl.
"Okay, well, I'm not a sinner." Says Andrew and that gets their attention.
"Go on." Said Vaggie.
In response, he simply lowered his hood. Revealing a human face, rather average by human beauty standards, blue eyes and mid-length black hair tied back in a low tail.
This surprised the three residents of hell in the limousine.
"Okay, I didn't see that one coming." Said Angel Dust, who was the first to open his mouth.
"Oh this is incredible! A human alive and well in hell!" Said Charlie excitedly, thinking that if a human can come to hell, then it really is possible for souls trapped in hell to ascend to heaven.
"Yes, in fact, I am a human, I was able to come before a portal I found closed." Andrew declared.
"And the rest? The sword, the armor." Said Vaggie.
To answer this question, Andrew took out a briqué and a calligraphy brush, which intrigued the trio. He lit the lighter and, with a flick of the brush, the flames came to life, forming illustrations in an old Japanese drawing style.
"Where there is light, shadows lurk and fear reigns. Yet by the blade of the knights, Mankind was given hope." Said Andrew, so the flames ended up depicting an abstract version of Garo swinging his sword before the flames disappeared.
"And what's that supposed to mean, this two-bit prophecy?" Angel Dust asked, unwittingly breaking the mystical mood Andrew had set.
"I'm part, or rather was part, of an order called the Makai Order. Our mission is to fight and kill creatures called Horror. Creatures living in the Makai, a world parallel to the human world, perhaps even heaven and hell." Andrew explained.
"Why's that?" Charlie asked, now a little worried that she'd welcomed a human version of the angel exterminators.
"Because they come to our world by possessing humans through objects, then they feed by killing humans. Our mission is to protect humans from the Horrors. And for that we have no choice but to kill them with Soul Metal weapons and armor, the only material that seems to be able to hurt them." Andrew explained, looking at his reflection in the blade of his sword.
"If that's the case, then why did you come here? There are no humans to protect here. Just a collection of dead freaks in the human world." Angel Dust retorted.
"Because I think it applies here too." Andrew retorted, again surprising the demons. "For a human to be possessed, there are two criteria that must be met: an object that can serve as a bridge between the two worlds or in which the Horror resides, and a host succumbing to the darkness."
This answer worried Charlie and Vaggie.
"And people who have succumbed to the Darkness are practically the only ones here." Vaggie muttered.
"Right now it's just a theory on my part. I don't know if it's possible in hell." Said Andrew, trying to appease the two women. "But the Order hasn't wanted to study this hypothesis."
"And you'd rather take the risk of being stuck here until you die, or even for eternity, just to prove your theory?" Angel Dust asked skeptically.
"Not only that. I've also had enough of certain Makai Order rules."
"What do you mean?" Charlie asked.
"We have laws, like the one about only going after Horror. So if a normal human does something questionable or reprehensible. We don't have the right to attack them. We could protect mankind while guiding them towards a bright and hopeful future, without taking away their free will. But because of these laws, we're forced to let humans who spread despair get away with it." Andrew explained, squeezing the stitches. "And I've decided to fuck those laws. I'm tired of letting bad people drag others down. I want to help..."
"That was his main source of conflict with the Order." Said a voice that seemed to come from nowhere.
"Who said that?!" Angel asked, checking everywhere in the limousine.
"It was me." Said the voice as Andrew raised his hand to reveal a ring with a skeletal face. "My name is Zaruba. I'm Garo's Madogu. Pleased to make your acquaintance."
"A Madogu?" Vaggie asked.
"It's a conscious piece of jewelry created to assist a Makai knight. Most of the time, they're used as Horror detectors." Andrew explained.
"It's a bit of a crude explanation, but that's what it is." Zaruba confirmed.
"All explanation of who I am aside, I heard about your hotel from the interview earlier." Andrew declared.
"Oh yeah, you must have thought it was ridiculous." Said Charlie with her head down.
"Well, he made us look like a fucking joke." Says Vaggie, pointing at Angel Dust.
"No, no, jokes are funny. I made you look sad and pathetic, like an armless, legless orphan with progeria." Said Angel Dust.
"Well, you're more of a joke than they are after I kicked your ass." Andrew retorted.
"Hey!" Said Angel Dust.
"So, do you have any rooms left?" Andrew asked, surprising them.
"What?" Said Vaggie.
"Really?" asked Charlie with a smile.
"Yeah, I don't think there are good guys on one side and bad guys on the other. People have had to go to hell because of a bad decision. From what I understand, every year some angels decide to do a mass murder session. And I don't appreciate that. Some demons or sinners deserve a chance to go to heaven. Since that's your goal too, I want to help you." Said Andrew.
"Oh my God, then allow me to welcome you to the Happy Hotel." Said Charlie, holding out her hand, which he shook.
"Well, at least she's happy again." Vaggie declared. "But after that train accident with Angel Dust, it's hard to imagine anyone else coming to the hotel."
"Does that mean I don't have any free rooms?" Angel Dust declared.
"Oh, come on. We don't know things are over yet, in fact, we're out of help for the hotel, so there's still hope." Charlie said, which made Vaggie smile.
They then arrived at the hotel, entered and saw that the place was empty with a few welcome signs, Vaggie headed for a sofa while Andrew looked around.
"Well, it's comfortable."
"And a bit run-down." Zaruba commented before taking a flick from Andrew. "Ouch!"
Angel Dust walked over to the fridge, grabbed a box of ice cream and took one out.
"Hey, it's probably a good idea to find real food in this place." He said to Charlie, who was sitting in front of a crate. "You know, to feed all the rebellious souls you have here!"
He laughed, but then saw Andrew shake his head. He saw that Charlie was looking down and went to sit on the sofa. Andrew knelt down beside her.
"Hey, it's okay, sometimes it takes a while." He said while her eyes were still downcast. "You know, I saw you singing on the news."
"Did you make fun of me too?" Charlie asked.
"No, I loved it." Said Andrew, surprising all three as she looked up at him. "You've got talent and unlike the rest of this place you're like a light in this abyss."
"Well, it looks like you've got some competition for her." Said Angel Dust to Vaggie with an amused glance.
"Cállate bastardo." She said between her teeth.
"Thanks Andrew. Says Charlie.
Then they heard a knock on the door, they were confused and Charlie went to answer it, she then opened it to see a demon dressed in a red suit with a big smile, he then opened his eyes.
"Hel..." he began, before Charlie slammed the door in his face.
She looked to the side for a brief moment before opening the door again.
"... Lo." He finished before Charlie closed the door again.
"Hey, Vaggie." Said Charlie.
"What?" Asked Vaggie.
"The radio demon's at the door." Said Charlie.
"What!?" Said Vaggie shocked.
"Who?" Asked Angel Dust and Andrew.
"What should I do?!" Asked Charlie who was overwhelmed by the situation.
"Don't let him in!" Said Vaggie immediately.
Charlie thought about it but then opened the door.
"May I speak now?" He asked.
"You may." Charlie replied, to which the demon quickly reached out his hand.
"Alastor! Pleasure to be meeting you, sweetheart!" He said as he pulls Charlie towards him. "Quite a pleasure!" He said as he entered the hotel. "Excuse my sudden visit, but I saw your fiasco on a picture show, and I just couldn't resist! What a performance! Why, I haven't been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929!" He said before laughing as he plays with his cane. "Sooo many orphans..."
Vaggie then pointed a spear at his face.
"Stop right there. Cabron, hijo de perra! I know your game... And I'm not going to let you hurt anyone here! You pompous, cheesy, shitty host." She said.
"Oh come on, if I wanted to hurt anyone..." Said Alastor, moving the spear, before his face became more frightening. "I'd have done it already." Then his face returned to normal. "No, I came here because I want to help."
"What did he say there?" Charlie asked.
"Help! Hahaha, hello? Does this thing work? Test, test!" Said Alastor, tapping his microphone, which opened one eye.
"Well I heard you loud and clear!" Said the microphone.
"Um, you want to help? With...?" Charlie asked before Alastor teleported behind them with its shadow.
"This ridiculous thing you're trying to do! This hotel! I want to help you run it." He said.
"Buuut... why?" Charlie asked.
"Hahaha, why does anyone do anything? Sheer, absolute boredom! I've lacked inspiration for decades. My work became mundane, lacking focus, aimless! I've come to crave a new form of entertainment! Hahaha " Said Alastor.
"Okay, this guy smells trouble." Andrew declared.
"So does that mean you think it's possible for a demon to redeem himself?" Charlie asked.
"Of course not! It's absurd! Redemption, oh non-existent humanity! No no no no, I don't think there's anything left that could save such repugnant sinners!" Said Alastor, looking at Angel Dust, who shrugged. "Their chances were given to them while they were still alive, and they deserve to be punished. We can't do what's already been done!"
"So, why did you want to help us if you don't believe in my cause?" Andrew asked, arms crossed.
"Consider it a purely personal investment! I want to see the scum of the world struggle to climb the hill of redemption only to stumble repeatedly and fall into the fiery abyss of failure! Besides, I'm quite curious to know what a Makai Knight is doing here." Alastor tells him.
"How do you know about us?" Andrew declared, preparing to draw his weapon.
"I was almost eaten by a Horror once, but a member of your order saved me. I admit I have a certain respect for people like you. You have such a talent for killing, given your fighting skills. It's a shame I didn't get to meet more of them or be possessed by a Horror before I died." Said Alastor and angered Andrew, especially the mention that the demon would have wanted to become a Horror in his lifetime.
"Good thing that didn't happen." Said Andrew, looking him in the eye, but Charlie pulled him towards her and Vaggie.
"Charlie, you can't trust him, he's a manipulator, he can't be redeemed and he's most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we're trying to do." Vaggie declared.
"I... we don't know that! Look, I know he's evil, and I know he probably doesn't want to change, but the point is to give people a chance! To have faith, things will get better! How can I turn someone away? I just can't. It goes against everything I'm trying to do. Everything I believe in." Charlie declared.
"Charlie whatever you do, don't make a pact with him." Said Vaggie.
"Don't worry, I learned one thing from my dad!" Charlie said before imitating her father's voice. "Gotta show the demons who's boss!" She said before going to where Alastor was.
"Who's her father?" Andrew asked.
"Oh, that's right, you don't know, her father is Lucifer, the ruler of Hell." Said Vaggie a little proud that for once since their meeting, he was the one who was surprised.
"Okay, so, Al. You're sketchy as fuck and you clearly see what I'm trying to do here as a joke." Said Charlie as he turns away from Alastor, as bright red symbols begin to appear next to him that quickly disappear after Charlie turns back to Alastor. "But I don't. I think everyone deserves a chance to prove they can be better. So I'm taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no... tricks or voodoo strings attached."
"So, it's a deal then?" Said Alastor as he spins his cane and presents his hand for a handshake as green energy erupts throughout the hotel before Charlie refuses the handshake.
"Nope! No shaking! No deals! I... hmm... As princess of Hell and heir to the throne, I, uh, hereby order that you help with this hotel. For as long as you desire. Sound fair?" Said Charlie.
"Hmm... Fair enough!" Accept Alastor.
"That could have gone better." Andrew commented.
"So, where's your hotel staff?" Alastor asked Charlie.
"Uh, well..." She replied, pointing to Vaggie who was staring at him.
"Ohohoho, if you ask me, you'll need more help." Said Alastor, adjusting his monocle before walking towards Angel Dust. "And what can you do, my effeminate fellow?"
"I can suck your dick!" Said Angel Dust without the slightest shame.
The sounds of a microphone can be heard in the background as Alastor tries to process what Angel Dust has just offered him.
"HAH! No." He replied as he walked away.
"Your loss." Said Angel Dust in a mocking tone.
"And you, my dear Chevalier Makai?" Alastor asked Andrew.
"Well, I suppose my skills, I can provide security." Andrew declared.
"Good, and I can cash in a few favors to liven things up." Said Alastor before snapping his fingers, a new fireplace had replaced the hotel's worn one as he approached it and picked up the mysterious soot-covered figure, who then opened his only eye and stared at the trio behind him before the figure blew away all the soot in one fell swoop.
She was a little Cyclops demoness, with short but fluffy pink hair with a yellow tinge. Her outfit was 50s-themed, wearing a dark pink scarf, a white shirt with pink polka dots and a pink skirt with a poodle pattern and yellow dots.
"This little lady is Niffty!" Alastor introduced, dropping Niffty.
"Hi, I'm Niffty! Nice to meet you! It's been a while since I made any new friends!" Said Niffty before looking around and noticing how dirty the place was. "Oooh my god, this place is filthy! It really needs a woman's touch!" She said as she pulled out a feather duster and began to quickly clean the entire hotel.
They looked at Niffty as a voice from an unknown demon could be heard nearby. It looked like a cat and a flying monkey sitting at a poker table and it seemed confused.
"Hah! Read 'em and weep, boys! Full Ho..." He said as he lays poker cards on the table before illusions temporarily distort the environment. "...tel? What the fuck is this?" He asked looking around and saw Alastor, causing an angry purr as he pointed at him. "You!"
"Ah, Husker, my good friend! Glad you could make it!" Said Alastor.
"Don't you "Husker" me, you son of a bitch! I was about to win the whole damn pot!" Said Husker, showing the jackpot disappears.
"Good to see you too!" Said Alastor.
"What the hell do you want with me this time...?" Asked Husk.
"My friend, I am doing some charity work so I took it upon myself to volunteer your services! I hope that's okay!" Said Alastor.
"Are you shittin' me?!" Asked Husk, clearly annoyed by what Alastor just did.
"Hmm... No, I don't think so!" Said Alastor.
"You thought it'd be some kind of big fucking riot just to pull me out of nowhere?! You think I'm some kind of fucking clown?!" Asked Husk, clearly disturbed by what Alastor did.
"Maybe!" Said Alastor smiling as if he was about to laugh.
"I ain't doing no fucking charity job." Retorted Husk.
"Well, I figured you would be the perfect face to man the front desk of this fine establishment!" Said Alastor, showing the bar he's done his magic on. "With your charming smile." He said, pulling Husks' lips together in a forced smile as he walked towards the bar. "and welcoming energy, this job was made for you! Don't worry my friend, I can make this more welcoming! ...If you wish." He said as a bottle of "Cheap Booze" appears out of nowhere.
Husk stared at the beer for a few seconds before moving closer to the bar.
"What? You think you can buy me with a wink and some cheap booze?!" He said as he grabs the bottle and looks at it. "...Well, you can!" He said as he starts to drink the contents of the bottle and stands behind the bar counter.
"Well, he's an interesting fellow." Said Andrew and Alastor approached him.
Vaggie was about to protest, but Andrew made an interesting point.
"A bar wouldn't be a problem. Just don't go overboard." He said, which made Vaggie sigh in agreement.
"Yes! Angel Dust said enthusiastically before moving towards Husk to flirt with him. "Hi~" He said seductively.
"Fuck you." Said Husk.
"Only if you look at me!" Said Angel Dust, holding Husk's face so he'd look at him before being pushed aside by the hotel's new bartender.
"Oh my goodness! Welcome to the Happy Hotel! You're going to love working here!" Said Charlie, trying to shake her hand with a smile up to her ear and stars in her eyes and a big grin.
"I lost the ability to love years ago." Said Husk before continuing to drink his beer.
"So, what do you think?" Alastor asked.
"That's amazing!" Charlie replied, rubbing her cheeks in excitement.
Then suddenly, the hotel door exploded, carrying Niffty away until he was lodged in a wall. They all looked out to see Sir Pentious' warship standing in front of the hotel.
"Hah! Well, well, well. Look who's housing the striped monster and the swordsman! We meet again, Alastor!" Said Sir Pentious upon seeing Alastor as everyone present exited the hotel to see what was going on.
"Do I know you?" Alastor asked, offending the snake demon.
"Oh, yes! And this time, I have the effect of... SURPRISE!" Said Sir Pentious as he pulled a lever causing a large cannon to appear right in front of the Happy Hotel staff.
With a snap of his finger, Alastor opened another dimensional portal with tentacles and shadow demons emerging from it, destroying Sir Pentious's ship while he was inside. Alastor can then be seen finishing him off by clenching his fist with a few drops of blood dripping from his hand as the ship exploded.
Alastor then flashed a menacing smile of satisfaction for a moment as the others looked on in horror and shock.
" ... Well, I'm starving!" Said Alastor breaking the tension. "Who wants some Jambalaya? My mother showed me a wonderful recipe for Jambalaya. In fact, it almost killed her! Hahaha! Ohoho, I'm boiling hot! Yes, my friends! Great things are going to happen! Now..." Said Alastor before using his magic to change the sign at the top of the hotel from "Happy Hotel" to "Hazbin Hotel".
Late at night, Andrew looked out of the window and saw all hell breaking loose. He could then see a huge clock telling the sinner when the next extermination would take place, and this is something Charlie was trying to prevent with the hotel, so he'll just have to help him.