Hello One and All in Interweb Land!
HOLY DONKEY BALLS WRITER'S BLOCK SUCK SO MUCH!
Seriously, this chapter just giving me so many walls to hit I swear my face is flat as a board now. But I got it through it and I'm happy how it turned out, thank whatever higher powers for that.
I also want to give a shoutout to Maksell for your review/comment/slightly ranting text. Thank you for your interest in my story and I know it's kinda on the slow side but like I said in the introduction chapter till more info on Hazbin Hotel comes up I'm kinda dragging ass. And thanks for taking the time to leave a review on this story, hell, thanks to ALL who did that. Its nice to know this story isn't a complete wreck and does have potential. I hope over time I'll get better in this and give you guys some good quality stories in the future. You guys and girls rock!
Alright no more of the sappy kissassness, let's get into why you are all here for!
Our favorite sexy creepy radio host is putting a scheme in the works and it revolves around screwing with Godzilla. And you can already guess how that'll end…or do you?
Ok no more vague bull hockey let's just see the insanity of awesomeness happen!
THE RADIO SPOTLIGHT OF THE KING, SHIT IS GOING TO GET NUTS SO HOLD ON TO YOUR BUTTS!
Within the many rooms of the hotel we see the lair of one of the most feared Overlords Hell has ever seen, Alastor. A demon of near absolute terror, he has forged a reputation as one of sadistic and masochistic nature all the while acting polite and sporting a dashing, albeit creepy, smile to all around him. He is a contradiction in a suit, well-mannered and kind one moment and pants shitting terrifying the next, you never know when he'll flip on you. This makes everyone that has ever came even close to him feel uneasy with never knowing what he'll do next. Even other Overlords must keep a good distance from him.
Indeed, Alastor is a fearsome Demon that has ever set foot in Hell. So feared in fact that he is now planning a rather fiendish plot by doing squats wearing some 20's exercise clothing…while a steady tempo emitted from him…making it look like he was more of…an old timer dingus stuck in the past…wait…
"And a one and a two and a three and a stretch!" Alastor spoke in a chipper tone.
…Is this dude doing morning exercise!? Holy Hell he IS a flip-flop schmuck! Going from a scary fucker to…this! Pick one and stick with it dammit!
Alastor was doing his morning stretches getting ready for the day. Though he has nothing planned at the moment he always holds the notion that one should be ready for a day like no other since you have no idea what it holds. After 20 minutes of his squats he did one final stretch letting out a content breath wiping a few beads of sweat from his brow.
"Nothing like a good heart pumping squats to start your day. Now then, let's clean up and get this day going!" He grinned heading to the showers for a quick washdown.
After 30 minutes he came out fresh and clean sporting a proud smile. He casually walked over his closet to pick today's cloths. Opening it he was greeted with a row of his usual suits, all the same style with no difference from one another. He went through each one looking for the right one.
"What should I wear today? Not this one, this one is so last month, not the right time, wow I still have this old thing?" He went to each one as through they're were different clothing.
"Aha! Perfect!" He took out the suit and in a swift motion put it on in a blink of an eye.
He walked over to a mirror to inspect himself making sure everything was perfect.
"My what a handsome devil I am, wouldn't you say?" He asked his shadow who gave him the thumbs up agreeing.
"Now then, let's see what the others are doing."
Alastor left his room and with a hum and pip in his step walked to the stairs and walked all the way to the first floor. Once on ground level headed to the dining area with a calm smile on his face. The Overlord enter the room and saw everyone was at the table doing different things. Angel Dust was eating cereal looking through his phone with a board expression. Godzilla and Niffty were sharing a meal together that had some eggs, ham, sausage patties, toast, and what looks like some fish. The King didn't have a problem sharing his meal with the little cyclops since Niffty wasn't talking too much so he was cool with her now.
Charlie and Vaggie were next to them eating their own meals with Charlie occasionally making a happy hum sound when she looked over at Godzilla and Niffty finding it cute that they were sharing a meal. Moe was hovering by the group of four with a screen out in front of him with unusual writing going over what appears to be data. Razzle and Dazzle were also eating at the table next to the two owners. But what really got Alastor's attention was he also saw Husker eating his meal. The Cat Demon was normally out cold from his usual night of drinking a butt ton of booze and would only pop up later in the day. So it was a small surprise for Alastor to see him and he capitalize on it.
"Well look what the cat dragged in, surprise to see you old Husker buddy." Alastor walked over to him with a small shit eating grin.
"Don't go there asswipe, I'm not as drunk as I'm usually am so I decided to get something to eat. So fuck off!" He snapped at him.
"That's even more astonishing! Hello ladies and gentlemen, we have some breaking news from the Hazbin Hotel. Our resident drunkard is sober enough to join all of us for breakfast, what a surprise! A rarity indeed! Only at the Hotel do such wonders can happen, continue to stay tune as more of these come to light!" Alastor spoke in his microphone cane with energy as different sound effects played.
Godzilla looked at the display and cocked his head to the side wondering what he was doing. Alastor saw this and with a smile decided to explain.
"You've heard me being called the 'Radio Demon' yes? Well it's more than a title, I run a radio broadcast throughout Hell so everyone can listen in on whatever is happening. And that means I've been also broadcasting the events of what has been going on since I got here from the drama, the shenanigans, hijinks, and tomfoolery of the day to day activities here." He explained.
"You've been doing WHAT!?" Vaggie screeched in stun anger.
"You heard right my Banshee Belle; I've even been letting my listeners know all that has been going on including what the 'King' has been doing, what he has done, and what he could do."
"Alastor are you crazy?! We can't let people know that Godzilla is here, who knows what insane nutcase will do if they learn he's here, especially with the bounty on his head just gone up!" Charlie was having a mini freak out attack.
Charlie feared the worst, not for those that might showed up but what Godzilla will do to them. He wasn't known for giving the light touch in situation like those. In fact, the 'light touch' would be him putting Demons in the hospital for months from just pushing them away.
"He has a bounty? Hold a sec, let me see where it is…ok got it. It looks like it's now…400 MILLION BUCKS! Hot Damn we have a potential gold mine folks!" Angel said with the money sign in his eyes after he looked it up from his phone.
"…You're not thinking what I think you're thinking…are you?" Dazzle asked in slight worry while his twin also looking worried.
Holy Crap forgot these two where part of the Hotel staff!
(AN: Real talk though, it's kinda hard for me to write these two since not much is given about them. Like all the other characters, I'm somewhat winging it here.)
"Why not? We can say we 'capture' him, bring him to whoever is handing out the massive reward, let the Big Guy bust out of there, and we laugh all the way back here with the dough in hand. It's the perfect plan." He explained.
"…that…might work." Husker said starting to see the idea as possible.
"Oh no you two don't, you assholes are not going to pull something that asinine off! What makes you think that will even work? Hell, how do any of us know this 'reward' isn't some trap for anyone dumb enough to actually do this?" Vaggie asked.
"She does have a point; it could be some sort of trick." Niffty agreed.
"Then we won't lose much. If it turns out to be a trap than me, Husker, and Godzilla here will beat their asses to the ground and take what they have. It's a win/slight win deal no matter what." Angel smiled at his logic.
"You will do no such thing! This will hamper your chance of getting redeemed, not to mention the obvious fallout that will happened. Besides, using Godzilla like that is both wrong and basically impossible. Do you really think he'll go along with that?" Charlie asked pointing out the biggest flaw.
Angel looked over to Godzilla who was giving him a hard glare obviously against the idea of being used. He doesn't like that for obvious reasons.
"…Ok yeah fare point…so much for getting rich." He huffed.
"Ooo, a fatal blow to moral! Looks like the get rich quick scheme was shot done before it was even put to play. I must say folks, I was hoping to see that in action. Oh, the carnage and death it would have brought. Alas, not all ideas can come to light. But around here another one will come soon and I personally can't wait to see!" Alastor spoke in his cane.
"You know, it probably wouldn't work anyways since he has been talking about it on the air since you suggested it." Niffty pointed out.
"…Fuck." He said in a low voice.
"Al, I wish you would have told me you were doing this. This is not the type of exposer I wanted for this place. Not only does it paint the hotel as some run of the mill crappy sitcom but it demoralizes everyone here." Charlie looked at Alastor with a frown.
"Now my dear, if I remember correctly, you ordered me to help your establishment in any way possible which means using all at my disposal to get the word out. And as you can guess, my radio skills do just that, spreading the word far and wide to all in Hell. And if I may reiterate our conversation from before, I will help 'for as long as I desire' as long as I get the joy of the entertainment I seek." He replied in a snarky tune with his grin becoming more sinister.
"I knew it! You backstabbing bastard used her good nature to trample and abuse for your own sick and twisted ways!" Vaggie vented at him with her spear out ready to go all out.
"Now ain't that the truth…wait a minute, if you've been broadcasting the dino since he got here, then how come no one came looking for him here?" Husker asked.
The question left the room quite as he brought up a good point.
"Hey yeah, he's been here for about a week or so yet we haven't even seen a freaking Peeping Tom outside the window. And with the dough that is being placed on his head you can bet your left nut at least one desperate loser would try their luck. So what gives?" Angel asked.
"…Actually, that's a good point. I would have thought we would see some suspicious activity around here but it has been rather…calm for that." Alastor said with a curious look on his face.
"That would be my doing." Moe chipped in.
"What do you mean?" Charlie asked.
"I've been blocking all outgoing information when it comes to the King here which includes radio." He explained.
"…You…what?" Alastor asked in a low tone.
"Allow me to elaborate. When the Princess first brought Godzilla and me here, course she didn't know I was there, and asked for him to wait, I detected unique radio waves coming from inside. I did a quick scan and concluded that a living being was using the waves to transmit information much like a radio does, which I find highly fascinating! Once I deduced what the signal was and what purpose if could potentially have, I alerted Godzilla about it. I gave him a brief summary of what they are and what it means and as you can guess, he wasn't happy with the possibility that anyone can find him so easily. Keeping a low profile was essential so he asked me if I could stop the transmissions. I told him I could monitor the outgoing signals and isolate any that even remotely has him in it. He said do it and I have since then. So any and all info on him outside this hotel is not possible." He went further.
"So as far as anyone is concerned, no one knows Godzilla is here?" Vaggie asked.
"From radio, T.V., Internet, cellular and hardline phone along with any similar broadcasting types. I can't guarantee others forms of information's has been leaked such as word of mouth or photography."
"Well that's good to hear at least. Now Al I want your…Al, you ok?" The Princess looked at the radio host and notice something is off about him.
Alastor stood silent the whole time with his smile not as bright as before. The feeling of uneasiness was felt by everyone as the silence seemed to carry a foreboding sense to all.
"So…you are telling me…you censored my work…this whole time?" He finally asked still in a low eerie tone.
"In regards to Godzilla yes, I am indeed sorry to do that but it was essential that it was done. The less others know about that particular knowledge the safer it'll be for all." Moe said with what appears a sorry icon in his optic.
"…You know my little metal contraption…it's not every day I come across someone or something in this case that's…oh what's the word I'm looking for?" Alastor slowly moved to Moe playfully tapping his chin though you can feel the air getting real tense.
"It's on the tip of my tongue…oh yes that right, someone like you who does something like what you did and that somewhat INFURIATES ME SO!" His voice suddenly changed dramatically.
Alastor's form suddenly morphed making him look more demonic and monstrous than before as the area around him seemed to change as well. Little red signs of unknown origins seemed to float around the distorted area. The unmistakable feeling of malic, vileness, and sinister taint was heavy in the air. His smile was filled with such haunting evil as a black substance seemed to drool in between the teeth make it even more unsettling. The other residents were both unnerved and scared of what will happen to the robot but seemed to be stuck in place for the same reason.
"Uh oh." Moe saw this was going to get ugly.
"To have my work altered by a machine is most unbecoming. I would have thought something like you, a little info digging mouse, would have been smarter knowing with all you have on me that doing this would result in this. But it seems I'm mistaken, perhaps I should enlighten you on what happens to those that have the gall to do what you did!" He spoke in a distorted radio-like voice.
Of all the things Alastor can't stand, one of them is when some fool decides to mess with his work. It was one of the biggest grips he has. He was going to teach Moe a lesson he'll never forget. He saw the little robot was shaking a little with a caution icon in his optic blinking rapidly which made him chuckled darkly at the display. He does love is so to see his victim's fear, it gave him such vigor. Suddenly his vision was replaced by a wall of dark green scale and the sound a deep growl. Alastor turned his head a little before his gaze met up with the harden golden glare of Godzilla.
Godzilla quickly got in between the two in order to spar Moe from being scrapped. He wouldn't say it out loud but he has grown to see the little robot as a good ally to have and he would help him in his time of need. The Kaiju King was not fazed by this display and with no fear got up close to Alastor ready for whatever he would dish out.
"So you don't like me messing with your little metal pet? But are you willing to fight me to save him from his punishment?" He asked.
The sound of a low hum growing louder as his spikes started to glow brightly with a neon-blue light was all the answer he needed.
"Shit is about to hit the fan…this is so going on the web!" Angel got his phone out and started recording the two.
"Guys please, this doesn't need to get out of hand!" Charlie tried to reason the two but they seemed to ignore her.
Both just stood there neither budging from their spot. This was a Will of Playing Chicken, who would faulter first, the infamous Radio Demon or the King of the Monsters? The others were on edges waiting for the fight to break out and the bloodshed to happened. Charlie wanted to stop this from escalating any further but she knows she wouldn't really be able to stop it without making it worst or adding to the pain. She didn't like this feeling and just wanted this to end.
"As much as I would like to go against you, to see your power unleashed…I'm afraid our lovely Princess wouldn't like that too much. So another time." Alastor finally spoke as he reverted back to his normal look.
Seeing this, Godzilla also doused his spikes seeing no need to continue this. Godzilla also didn't want to deal with another blubbering Princess going out on him for doing things like this. He's trying to avoid such headaches as much as he can. Charlie let out a sigh of relieve seeing it didn't go any further than that. That was a load off her mind.
"Dammit! What a rip off!" Angel huffed feeling he got cheated again.
"Good, this place wouldn't survive them going at it like hot blooded males hyped on steroids." Vaggie said to him.
"Or us if we got caught in that shit storm." Husker added.
"Sorry to end this act abruptly but it seems we must put a pause in this, we'll continue this some other time. Till then!" Alastor suddenly vanished in an instant.
"…That can't be good." Vaggie said feeling this will get worse.
"It ain't. I know that prick, when something like this happens, he'll pull some bullshit way to piss you off as a 'warning' as he puts it. I say we watch it, especially you two. You never know when he'll pop back up and fuck you over." Husker warned Moe and Godzilla.
"Like the sound of that." Angel giggled a little at the last part.
"Oh shut up you perv." Vaggie growled at him.
"Noted and thank you for the warning." Moe said while Godzilla just snorted.
"You're not concerned what he could do?" Niffty asked Godzilla and he shook his head no.
Whatever plan Alastor would pull Godzilla will face it head on and overcome it like so many others.
"Not a real surprise there…but let's try not to think about that now. I'll be heading to my office so if anyone needs me, I'll be there." Charlie excused herself and left the dining area.
As she walked to her office the Princess let out a tiring sigh. Things around here haven't been going exactly as she thought they would. Everything seemed to just be getting worse, little by little the melting pot of frustration and aggravation seemed to be adding up to the point she feels it'll overflow soon. If it's not infighting its these sudden unexplained circumstances that are popping out of the woods like crazy. And of course, some of the residence seemed to just be making it worse either making the problem, unintentionally adding to it, or just pliantly not caring enough to solve it without destroying something or causing a new problem. This cause her much worry for the prospect of the hotel's future.
But her greatest worries was Godzilla himself.
From her perspective it seemed the Kaiju was not integrating into the ways of living here as she hopes nor did it seemed he was actually willing to go along with the change. Though hard to tell on the surface, she feels the main factor of this it seems everyone here is grating his patience to the ground, including herself. Charlie feels that Godzilla's patience might be running thin which would result in something that can't be fixed. She was grateful for his 'mellow' behavior and patience has lasted this long but she knows it's only a matter of time before that all goes out the window. Charlie knows she needs to act fast before it's too late and she has an idea or two that could work. One of her main idea's is to pick up the pace for finding a possible solution for the King to be able to leave Hell. Believing if Godzilla sees this then he would restrain himself from doing anything irrational a bit longer.
While still wishing to give him a taste what a good life can be, she realizes at this rate that could take too long to accomplish. The idea of it never being a possibility was also in the forefront of her mind. As much as she doesn't want to, she might need to shelf that idea…perhaps permanently. Charlie felt she was failing him on this but was beginning to think that her idea of giving him a better life will never happen. He just wrestles with everything she and the others try. Anything and everything they bring to him, whether it was a good or bad idea of a thought, activity, item, even words, he basically says no. Every step is a fight from him, never willing to even give it a chance or meet in the middle. It either needs to make sense to him or it was shit to him.
Being called a 'Stubborn Ass' wouldn't even come close to the Kaiju huh?
"Maybe it was asking too much from him. He has made it more than clear he doesn't want a different life and even though I believe he could really need it…perhaps that's the problem. If I push it too far than it would seem I'm forcing it on him and I don't want him to feel that. I guess I should just put that on hold and focus on how he can leave here."
With that in mind, Charlie enter her office to begin her research.
WITH ALASTOR
We see Alastor walking calmly down the streets of the city not really having a destination in mind. He just wanted to take a stroll letting his mind wonder a bit, mainly with what happened back at the hotel. His little 'ruffle' with the King was not only entertaining as hell but fun! It was both exhilarating and heart-pumping exciting thing he has done in years! Such a rush he felt in his blood that it was almost akin to a drug rush in the system. The feeling of adrenaline sweeping through his veins, the tingle of his spine slowing going through his back, his senses on max as if awaiting the next thing, and the millions of possibilities that ran through his imagination.
It was beyond a thrill; it was damn near ecstasy and he wanted more!
Alastor stopped himself, though he wanted to see more he wouldn't let himself to be easily swept away in the excitement as what almost happened back at the hotel. If Charlie didn't speak up as she did than who knows what could happened. As entertaining as it was, he knows doing anything blindly will end pretty much as bad as one would think. If he tries anything obviously against Godzilla, who would perceive it as a challenge, will most likely kill him. Alastor holds no illusions that he could take him head on, the King was far too powerful to fight. Hell, he figured he might last maybe 3 minutes at best.
Yeah not good odds.
"Oh what a dilemma I'm in. On one hand I wish to experience more of what happened yet on the other I'd be ashes and dust in no time flat! Truly a pickle indeed, what can a poor Radio Demon do…mmmm…perhaps there could be a way." Alastor began scratching his chin as a thought appeared.
The idea was this, does he need to be physically in the line to get the entertainment he graves? Now as to why he was even thinking of doing anything that would piss off Godzilla was a rather simple thing.
He was fucking bored!
As with anything he does including this new scheme in the works he is motivated out of boredom. It is also the reason way he is 'helping' at the hotel; it could be a great source of fun, shenanigans, excitement, and joy for him to see and experience. But it was going rather slow for his liking. Yes there was the few odd times that made him grin and chuckle but they were akin to eating crackers and not the full blown five-star meal he wanted. And dammit he wanted that meal.
And to get that 'meal' he figures he would get it through different means, at least a good portion of it. What if he got someone else to…lend their services to him in this, a proxy if you will and have them rail up the Kaiju to unleash his might on them. Now this wouldn't be like him doing it but seeing it would be a damn close second which he was fine with. Plus if he was being honest with himself, this will also send a message to both the King and Moe what happens when someone fucks with his broadcast like they did.
Alastor knows that was a bit vain and childish to think this but when you have something you love doing, something that you took the time to create and made with your own hands only to have someone do what Moe did…well he couldn't help feel a little payback was in order. While it was Moe who wronged him, it was Godzilla who gave the greenlight to do it. And for the fact Alastor didn't think he could directly get to the little robot with Godzilla looking over him. So this indirect way of saying 'don't fuck with the Radio Demon' will be just as good.
Now the question, who would be retarded-I mean brave enough to even think of going after Godzilla was a bit of a conundrum. With the title he has and the display of power he showed many demons, even some Overlords, would be hesitant to try anything against him. The bounty was a good start but Alastor believe there needed to be a deeper drive, something that would give anyone the necessary 'courage' to go after Godzilla. Revenge is always a great motivator but who would have a grip with the Kaiju? Thinking about it for a minute Alastor let out a low dark chuckle as he remembered something.
"Perhaps those three fellows from the 'Show and Tell' can kindly lend their services. It would stand to reason they would want a little payback, or at least one of them…this will most likely kill them but so be it! I am willing to make such a sacrifice…now then, onward ho!"
Alastor suddenly turned into a shadow-like form and in a blink of an eye disappeared. He reappeared in another part of the city on top of a building. This one section of the city looked rather familiar, it was a little run down with the area not well kept that had a seedy feel to it from both sight and smell. This is the same area Godzilla visited when he first came to Hell. The Radio Host came to this place to 'recruit' the few Demons that might have a big enough gripe towards the Kaiju that they would do anything to get back at him. Now Alastor doesn't really know if this would actually work or not but figured what's the worse could happen?
Plus it'll be fun seeing their faces when they meet him.
Snapping his fingers, a dozen shadow figures appeared around him different shape and forms came around him. With a wave of his hand, the shadows all went in different directions looking for their targets. Alastor stood on the roof waiting patiently for them to return. He was confident they will find them soon, despite the area was rather large, with them searching it won't last no longer than 30 minutes at worst. He hummed to himself rocking back and forth slowly looking at his nails in faint interest. About 15 minutes later, three bodies suddenly pop into existence about 7 feet in the air and slammed into the roof with a heavy thud.
"Holy Fuck Berries!" A purple scorpion screamed in surprise.
"Get off me you…wait what!?" A three-eye demon blinked looking like he was fighting off something.
The third one didn't say anything mainly cause the large one was sleeping holding his pillow close to his head snoring like no one's problem.
"What in the-Bruce, what the-where are we?" The demon asked the scorpion.
"I have no idea Cross; I was watching this great action movie I saw when I was a kid and then I'm here. You?" Bruce asked.
"I was getting some cigs when these fucking black things came out of nowhere and jump me. I was trying to fight them off but then everything went black and next thing I know I'm here. What the ever-loving-wait Tub, he's here too?" Cross points to the sleeping demon.
"Seriously, he even sleeps when being kidnapped? Goddamn he can sleep through anything. HEY LARD ASS, WAKE UP!" Bruce yelled kicking him hard in the gut.
"OOF! Hey what the fu-Bruce? Why are you in my room kicking me?" Tub asked in annoyance.
"We're not in your room idiot, look around!" Cross pointed out.
Tub looked around and saw indeed he was not in his room.
"The hell are we?"
"That's what we're trying to figure out. I think someone snatch us and brought us all here. Why I haven't got a clue." Bruce explained.
"You think it was Gwen, she was pretty pissed with us two days ago with that whole shipment we lost." Tub asked.
"Hey that wasn't our fault!" Cross said quickly.
"Yeah, it was your fault." Bruce corrected.
"Me!? How was that my fault?" He asked with narrow eyes at the scorpion.
"You were trying once again to look like a badass to that slut and while that went nowhere and she insulted you, you had the brilliant fucking idea of throwing a rock at some dudes who not only kicked our assess but took the shipment with them as 'compensation' making us look pathetic." He explained looking mad at the whole experience.
"Don't call Ronnie a slut asswipe! And I was this close in getting her to go out with me too if it wasn't for you complaining about your claw." Cross retorted back.
"Oh, so it was my fault you failed in getting her in bed? News flash Cross, you ain't a catch nor with the way you act exactly like an X-rated Johnny Bravo will you get ANY bitch to fuck you! Plus of course my claw still hurts thanks to that lizard that basically made my claw useless. And it didn't help when those guys jumped us it made it even worse. AND to top it all off we know have a pissed off Gwen that wants our balls snipped off for losing her stuff. So yeah, YOU FUCKED up because you wanted to FUCK that bitch and we inter got completely FUCKED up by those assholes and now we're FUCKED even worse from Gwen who thinks we FUCKED her over that now wants to FUCKING kill us!" Bruce basically yelled at Cross.
"Yep, that's the gist of it alright." Tub agreed.
"…ok fine…I messed up and now it seems we're going to get it hard up the ass it seems…wait hold on, I don't think Gwen is behind this. I've never seen those creatures before nor do I believe Gwen has anything near like those things under her thumb." Cross suddenly realized.
"You got a point there…for once…but if Gwen isn't the one who napped us… then who?" Bruce asked.
"Perhaps I can enlighten you on that." Alastor finally spoke up getting the three's attention.
"What the-who are you and how long have you've been standing there?" Tub asked.
"You may call me Alastor and I've been on this rooftop well before you came dropping in. Greetings good sirs!" He bowed a little.
"…That name…that seems familiar." Tub rubbed his chin trying to figure out where he heard that name before.
"Did you get snatched up like us?" Bruce asked.
"Hardly, you can say I had a hand of your sudden relocation if you will." He smiled brightly.
"YOU kidnapped us!? Then your ass is grass!" Cross jumped at Alastor claws out.
Alastor was one step ahead and disappeared just as Cross was a foot away making him eat roof with his face. Alastor reappeared sitting on the edge of the roof with a calm smile like he didn't care he was attacked.
"There's no need to be hostile, I mean you no harm what so ever." Alastor said with a calm voice but it felt off to them.
"Bullshit!" Bruce spat out.
"Don't trust me, then allow me to speak my attentions then you can judge from there. Sounds fair?"
"Alright, why have you taken us against our will and brought us here?" Tub asked going up to him trying to intimidate him with his size.
But all Al did was smile a slight wicked grin that gave all three Demons a chill down their back.
"I knew you were reasonable folks, now as to the why of your inquiry, I personally sought you out for a particular opportunity you all might be interested in. You have no doubt heard of the creature known as the Angel Slayer, yes?"
"Oh for fucks sakes, can't I go one day without hearing about that damn lizard!" Cross got all heated looking ready to strangle someone.
"Pardon?" Al asked a bit intrigued by that outburst.
"Don't pay him any attention. He's just sore about that dino getting all the attention, especially for a certain slut we know." Bruce waved it off.
"Don't call Ronnie a slut asswipe! And its more than that, after that video went on the air showing that fucking lizard killing all those Exterminators all everyone talks about it like it some big thing. It's like that thing did some unimaginable miracle that no one has ever tried and now it seems everyone wants to suck its dick for that reason. Big fucking deal." Cross retorted.
"Cross man, it IS a fucking deal. I've been here for a while and rarely you hear someone taking out that many Angels at once. A few sure but hundreds? That's unheard of for as long as I've been around." Tub explained.
"Don't bother Tub, he ain't going stop bitching till he fucks the slut or the dino is dead, neither of which will happen." Bruce added annoying Cross even more.
"Maybe not, what would you say if I told you I can give you the chance to go after the creature with the ability to take it on?" Alastor said getting their attention.
"Oh I can say a lot about that, mainly you talking out your ass, but the biggest one is why us?" Bruce asked.
"I've recently came into my possession some interesting info that all of you might have a grudge against it and hearing everything you all been talking about I was right." He explained.
"Yeah so what?" Cross huffed.
"Then that gives you the edge over everyone else!" Alastor spoke with exactment in his voice.
"Dafug you talking about ya stringy creep?" Bruce asked with a raised brow.
"Nearly everyone in Hell is looking for the creature yet either couldn't find it or went to the hospital in the vain attempt to take it down. In every case it was for the money they went after it but greed alone didn't give them the win. Revenge however..." He walked around them in a smooth and fluent motion but suddenly stopped when he got to the last word of his sentence.
"Oh revenge is a much greater motivation than what greed can give. I can't tell you how many stories I've heard about the lengths people go and what they've done all in the name of revenge. That will give you the extra to overcome it." He finishes with a coy smile.
The three Demons looked at him in dumbfound stupor for a little bit before looking at each other with confusement written all over their face. They had a hard time really understand what he was trying to get at.
"So…wait…you…you want us to go after the dino cause we have beef with it?" Bruce finally spoke putting it together.
"Indeed!" Al responded joyfully.
Silence fell on them before they burst into laughter.
"…Not exactly the response I was looking for…but I'll roll with it. Did I miss the punchline?" He asked politely.
"I say, you think we're that stupid? Last time we fought that thing we got our ass handed to us and that dino wasn't even trying. We even tried to get others to go after it and they had their ass kicked too. So yeah no thanks, one ass beating from it is more than enough for me." Tub said after he calmed down enough.
"That goes double for me, I nearly loss my claw to it so fuck going after that thing." Bruce added.
"And as much as I want to kill that thing even I know I have zero chances." Cross surprisingly agreed with his friends.
"Not exactly the sheep I thought but no matter, I do love to add more flare in my performances." Alastor thought.
"In your current state you are correct. But with my help that'll be but a trifle thing."
"Oh yeah right, look at the hotshot here boys. He thinks he's some high and mighty Overlord or something!" Cross mocked.
"Hey Ala-tard, if you are that powerful than go after the lizard yourself. We ain't no one's errand boys." Bruce snickered.
The three turned away from him still laughing but when they looked, they saw he was right in front them as if he just appeared from thin air. The demons stopped, looked back at where he once stood, then back at him confused.
"How'd you do that?" Tub asked.
"Oh that simple parlor trick? Just one of the many things I've learned over the years, nothing special really." He said nonchalantly.
"Ok now this is starting to annoy me even more. Get out of our way dipshit!" Crossed reached to the Overlord.
Alastor suddenly stopped the hand from touching him with his cane and with a swift motion with said cane had Cross flat on his back. It was such a fast motion that it took a good ten seconds for the demons to register what happened. Alastor just hummed acting what he did was child's play.
"Personal space if you would, thanks!" He said cheerfully looking down at the demon.
"Now you've done it skinny dick!" Bruce rushed in with Tub following close.
The two jumped in the air fist and claws ready to strike the radio host but Alastor stood calm and composed. He snapped his fingers as black clawed hands came from seemingly nowhere and caught the two just as their attacks were but an inch from him. The two blinked in surprised at the sudden appearance of the hands as all Alastor did was chuckled lightly and wiggle his fingers in that comedic hello motion at them before the hands slammed them both to the ground rather harshly.
Cross saw the whole thing and was unsure what to do as a slight fear crept in him. Before he could even think what to do, a third clawed hand grabbed and dragged him to his friends as all three are now held in the air. The hands held them firmly so they couldn't move no matter how hard they struggled. Alastor let them squirm a little more so the point of them getting out was not possible sink in. After a few minutes he slowly walked up to them with a grin that made them wary as to what he'll plan next.
"As fun as that was for me, I would like to get back to our conservation. I hope I have your full attention now." He asked them.
"…Fine…you made your point…what's this horseshit thing about us going after that fucker?" Cross asked in a low disgruntle voice.
"Excellent!" Alastor snapped his fingers and the hands disappeared making the three dropped on their butts.
"To make a long story short, I am here to help you take down the creature. You have the drive, I have the means, such a perfect combination wouldn't you say?"
"What's your stake in this? Why even do this?" Bruce asked.
"Boredom." He said simply.
"…Seriously, you kidnapped us, brought us here against our will, make us look like fools, tell us you want to help us get back at the lizard…all cause your bored?" Tub went down the list trying to make sense at this thought process.
"Why yes, what other reason does one do anything in life or afterlife?" Al said like it was a natural thing.
"…Guys…I think we're in the presence of a complete nut case here…we're fucked." Bruce said with a little grim tone in his voice.
"No need to worry, this is no true ploy on my part. And I can indeed help you."
"And what kind of 'help' are you suggesting?" Cross asked very skeptical about this whole situation.
"I have made contacts throughout Hell and a little beyond. I know someone that can outfit you gentlemen with the tools you'll need to go toe to toe with the beast." Alastor explained.
"Unless these 'tools' are like made from sci-fi tech ancient God power super magic that can blow up a world than I don't think any tool can help. Those Exterminator Weapons did shit against it and they are suppose to kill anything in Hell. What is better than those?" Bruce asks.
"This individual has weapons that you can describe at being…that whole nonsense description you just use and more." He answered.
Alastor saw they all were still apprehensive at what he was saying so he uses his tried and true method getting anyone to agree to him.
Use their Pride, Ego, Greed, Hate, and Selfish Desires against them.
"Still hesitant are we? Think of all the perks and benefits this will bring when you triumph over the creature. You will be the Demons that brought down the mighty Angel Slayer, a feat even those Exterminators couldn't do. The fame and fortune alone will make your lives signifyingly better. The Reward itself can get you anything your little black heart's desire, perhaps even smooth over whatever 'product' you lost to this Gwen character with said money you'll get. You'll be elevated to such a high status in our lovely society that I wouldn't be surprised if they give you the title of Overlords…not to mention you'll get the complete and desirable attention of a certain lady that has your eye."
As Alastor went over every enticing thing he used his shadow manipulation to show them what 'could' be making it all the more alluring. Such an enticing thing was making even the more pragmatic of the friends to really think hard on the prospect of doing this. The three huddles together and whispered among themselves of what Alastor said. Said Demon just smiled a slightly creepy grinning knowing he had them. Though he already knew he would, he has crafted his words and phrases to near perfection when it come to the art of the deal that made him so known and feared. Such an ability to use honey words and bombastic performance has netted him many souls in his grasp. So many he actually has forgotten how many he ensnared in his games in all his years of weaving deals. After what seemed like forever they finally looked back at him with some seriousness in their faces.
"If we actually do this, can guarantee you can give us what we need to go after that thing? The best of the best, top of the line, almighty powerful weapons to kill it?" Cross asked crossing his arms trying to look serious.
"I can give you all the tools you'll need but it will be you to actually accomplishes this. Deal?" Alastor stuck his hand out to shake.
The three looked at each other before nodding and Cross reached out and shook his hand. It was short and to the point with nothing weird on Alastor's part. Now this wasn't an actual deal on his part mainly cause he knows this will in all likelihood fail tremendously. He knows he won't get anything out of this so he wasn't going to go into his usual deals like with so many. Plus he truly believes that nothing short of Lucifer himself has an actual prayer of taking on Godzilla and making out alive. The King was just too powerful for any in this realm to take on, including himself. Besides, it'll be just as fun seeing them fail so no loss from him.
"Wonderful! Now with all that out of the way let's get you boys geared up for battle!"
Alastor snapped his fingers and a portal suddenly appeared beneath the three making them fall through screaming bloody murder. Alastor walked up to the edge of the portal got into position as if he was diving into a pool and jumped in.
LOCATION UNKOWN
In a small building somewhere within the city was a room filled with different types of weapons of all types seen in as a comfortable light illuminated the walls and floor showcasing the weapons on display. Behind a desk was a Demon that had a head that looked like the skull of a ram that had no jaw with spiral horns and blacken sockets with little pink dot like eyes in the middle. Its general body was almost like an anthropomorphic lizard with slim arms a four finger claws and thumb. It had four scorpion-like legs and a tail with a snake skull at the end. In fact, parts of its body had bones on it. The body was purple but the bones, including the skull, was blue with the only exception was the horns, they were blood red. It was around seven foot tall and looked pretty wicked looking. Almost like a badass metal cover.
But what it was wearing was a somewhat contradiction to its own body. It wore a traditions Scottish Kilt, a brown bowler, and rimless glassed. It was reading the paper as no one else was in the store but it, it was a slow day which was a major shift when it had droves of Demons and Sinners coming in and buying out nearly all its stock of weapons days before. It was at the point it had to do a major rush order to refill all its product to accommodate the next surge of buyers. But it has been rather quite the last two days. It has a board expression on its skull face though it was hard to tell as it reads the pages.
"What a boring day its been, not even a window shopper has come in. Might close early today, oh hey there's a sale on bowler hats today. Buy one get the second half off, not a bad deal. I might go over there today." It said in a deep male voice filled with age.
Just as he said that, a portal opened near his desk and popped out Alastor with a grin making a showy land.
"What a perfect exit if I do say so myself. Ah there's the very Demon I'm looking for; how have you've been Boris?" Alastor asked the demon with a polite tone in his voice.
"Not too bad. Kinda surprise to see you around these parts. Been what, at least 11 or so years since I last saw your deer butt?" Boris asked unfazed to see Alastor popping out of nowhere.
"More or less."
"So how about we get to brass tax and get to the why you're here?" He asked getting to the point.
"What, no time for a friendly chat?" Al asked with a fake hurt voice.
"With you, I rather get this done and over with. No offense Al, I like you and all but I know you too well that if you stay just long enough then I'll be regretting it for at least years to come. So what can I do you for?"
"Fair enough. I come in today with these fine gentlemen to acquire some of your finest acquisitions of the fire power kind." He said in showmanship voice.
"I see…and are these gentlemen invisible?" Boris looked over Alastor's shoulder.
Alastor looked a little confused at that and turning his head like an owl going 180 degrees looking around the room and as Boris said there was no one else. The Overlord blinked a few times realizing what happened and that made him chuckle a little.
"It seems like I left them in the pathway, easy fix." Alastor poke the edge of the portal that was still open.
In a few seconds the three Demons slammed on the ground as they hold onto each other looking like they saw death. They were mumbling like crazy obviously scared shitless at what they experience when they were temporary stuck in the portal pathway. Alastor closed it once they landed on the ground looking amused at what he was seeing.
"I might have overcooked them in there, oh how irresponsible of me. I'm so ashamed." He said dramatically obviously faking his concern.
"Oh yes, you must be tearing up inside of how awful you feel. Looks like these boys are out of commission but I think I can fix that." Boris moved from his desk and up to the terror-stricken Demons.
Going up to them and, with a swift motion, bitch slap the ever-loving crap out of them till their sanity came back.
"GAH! What the-what happened to us!" Tub exclaimed looking bewildered.
"That actually worked?" Alastor asked looking at Boris rather surprised.
"Sometimes it takes a good slap to bring you back to reality. How's it going boys, had a good trip with Al I see?" He asked sarcastically.
"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! The hell was all that!? Are you trying to kill us in there!?" Cross yelled at Alastor.
"Yeah man that was-wait, how can we die? We're already dead?" Bruce asked.
"Not the point here Bruce, who do you think you are pulling shit like that on us?"
"Well he is an Overlord so is it any surprise he does this? The whole 'Radio Demon' title should have made it clear to you three." Boris said like it wasn't anything new.
The room fell silent when he said that. The three's face turned into a paler version of their skin tune looking as if they once again saw death itself. Boris was a little confused by this.
"Seriously, you boys didn't know who Al was? I thought all Overlords were known?" Boris turned to Alastor.
"Not always, you'd be surprised how many in Hell don't know who is an Overlord or how many. Plus I rarely show my face to the masses, I do prefer the airwaves then the picture show." Alastor explained.
"Ah." Boris nodded seeing the logic in it.
"…Y…Y…Your t-t-t-the Radio Demon." Bruce asked in a small fearful voice.
"I've been called that yes." Alastor confirmed.
"…Bruce right…we're fucked." Tub said with the same tone as the scorpion.
"Now don't feel down my good sirs, this should only strengthen in what I said earlier. Now that you know who I am my words hold more weight in the task at hand." Alastor said in an upbeat voice.
"And I'm guessing what you've told them has something to do with me 'outfitting' these boys, right?" Boris asked.
"Yes indeed! I need you to set them up with your finest and best grade weapons you have for they are going to go on a mighty hunt like no other!"
"I suppose I could. Alright boys, take a gander at what I have here and pick your poison. Take as much as you think you need. I know you can foot the bill for anything I have in my showroom Al so they can go hog-wild." He gestures to the weapons in the room.
"Oh sweet! I call dips on this beauty!" Bruce was about to take a large shotgun but Alastor stopped him.
"I'm afraid these won't do, what they need is something with more power than these." Al said.
"That so? Well I did get a few new shipments of military grade weapons the royal army use so you can take a look at them in the back. In fact, I have a great deal on some RPG you might like." Boris pointed behind him and started to head to the back.
"As good as those are, I was thinking more of your…unconventional weapons you have in a special dimension you keep them in." Alastor said with a grin.
This made Boris stopped in his tracks and just stood there in silences. The three Demon were puzzled by this wondering what the fuck Alastor was talking about. Boris slowly looked back at Alastor before letting out a dry humorless chuckle.
"I would ask how you know about that but since it is you, I can hazard a guess or two. But just cause you know about that doesn't mean you'll get them. You don't have the strings to the pull, the money to use, or the title to get even the weakest of that stash. Hell, not even the Goetia Demon royals can't get them without paying a harsh price for them. And you damn well aren't anywhere near their level of influence, power, or financial backing so don't even bother." He said looking straight in his eyes with a tone of him being dead serious.
"Oh I had a feeling so I come to make a trade I think you'll find most interesting." Alastor said with a voice almost matching Boris.
"Doubt it but go ahead, what can you offer that not even the Goetia royals can pull on me?" Boris asked leaning on his desk.
"Two things really, the first is this." He held out his hand and an object appeared.
It was a little black gem-like item the size of a soda can with strange ruins all over its service.
"And what the hell is that?" Cross asked.
"Is that a Summoning Gem? Haven't seen those in centuries, well your right that I'm now interested in that. Let me look at it." Alastor handed the gem over.
He examined the gem to make sure it wasn't some fake and after a few minutes found it was indeed the real McCoy.
"Not a bad start, but this alone won't get you access to my stash. What was the other thing your putting up for bargain?" The Skull Demon asked.
"I owe you three favors." This made the Demon looked at him with a sound that can be described as confusement.
"Three favors from you plus the Summoning Gem…now that is an enticing carrot your luring me in…Mmm." Boris mused on the deal a little bit.
"…Am I the only one lost in all of this?" Bruce asked his friends in a quite tone.
"No I'm pretty lost myself. How'd we got from getting kidnapped to meeting the Radio Demon to this is…yeah what the fuck is going on?" Cross was scratching his head trying to figure out the situation they three were in.
"Normally I would ask for more…but considering your giving me such a rare item in such pristine condition and to have not one but three favors from you…I think we can make something work here."
"I was hoping you'd say that." Alastor smiled a bright creepy one.
"Indeed you would, alright chaps, follow me for your gear." He motions them to follow him.
The three where a little hesitant but they figure they cam this far, might as well go all the way. The four followed Boris through the back room filled with some pretty badass looking weapons but move passed it to another room that looked like a large storage closet where the Skull Demon stopped by the back wall. Boris ran his hand one the wall as if he was searching for something before a small opening no bigger that 6x6 box could fit revealed itself. He then pulled out a wicked looking dagger from it that was curved with jagged teeth on the blade. The metal was deep red and the handle was dark brown with what looked like an ornament eye that was orange with a black slit in the middle. The three were getting kinda nervous as to what that was going to be used for, it was giving off an uneasy arura they didn't like the feel of. Alastor was unfazed by it but was curious none the less.
"And what pray tell is that unusual blade is for?" He asked.
Instead of answering, Boris took a few stepped back to them without turning and jabbed the blade right in the middle of his skull head. It shanked deep into the skull as sickly dark purple blood oozed from the wound. He made a mild grunt in pain has he moved the blade back and forth digging it deeper. The action made the three friends moved back in shock and disgust.
"Ok what the actual fuck are you doing you sick freak!" Cross cried out in disgust and slight fear in his voice.
Again, he said nothing as he slowly removed the blade from his skull letting out a sigh. The blood dripped off the blade like thick molasses before he made a slashing motion in the air splattering the blood on the same wall he took the dagger out. The blood moved down the wall as gravity took hold. Boris then started chanting in this unknown tongue that sounded old and slightly creepy. Soon the blood on the wall came to live and started moving it what appeared to be a pattern of some kind. After a few minutes the blood made a pentagon with symbols of what looked like drawings like you see on cave paintings. Then without warning the paintings started to move like a puppet show before the whole thing exploded in a blinding light that made the four cover their eyes from such a harsh light. It soon died down and what was there now was a pathway that lead to a large open room.
"Ok, let's head on in to get you boys the toys you'll need." Boris finally spoke and enter the pentagon doorway acting like the whole thing was just something normal.
…God fucking dammit that was both cool and weird as shit wasn't it? What kind of Twilight Zone shenanigans did they step into?
"My that was a spectacular performance there! I had no idea you were a showman yourself Boris old boy."
"That? That's just a simple ritual to get into this pocket dimension. I've been using those for damn near anything I want to stay hidden. I found this particular method to have a better protection field then most types to access pocket dimensions like these. Harder to get into you know?"
"I can see…are you three going to stand there mouths gapping? It is rude to stare you know." Alastor told the three shellshocked Demons who had their jaws on the floor unable to process what they witness.
"I can always slap you boys silly if you don't get your asses in here. I don't have all day!" He called out to them with a mild aggravation in his voice.
That seemed to knocked them back to reality as they shook their heads from their stupor and cautiously enter the room. The room itself was about the same sizes of a gun shop but the walls were 'alive' as it were but it was hard to call it walls as it was more akin to a void with no end in sight. Same with the ceiling as it was just like the walls. Floating above were these ancient looking lanterns that lit up the room rather well. And what the light shown was an array of weapons unlike any they saw.
Many looked like the came from movies and games, those sci-fi looking things that can never be made real that had ludicrous power to end an enemy's life. Some looked like guns, others like bladed weapons, and the rest to weird to describe. Each one in their own little bubble barrier just floating a few feet off the grey ground. There were hundreds, possibly a thousand or two all lined up orderly and neatly. The three were flabbergasted at the display of what they saw.
"Ok enough looking shock. This is my special stash of weapons I've purchase, traded, stole, or otherwise over my years as a Merchant. These weapons here all are dangerous and powerful. Some from ancient and lost times and others from far off technological worlds that you can barely understand. Each is far more powerful than even those Exterminator weapons, some even can seriously harm a God in one way or another. Even kill. Each of you will take one, and I mean ONE weapon, pick carefully on what you'll need to do whatever it is you lot have plan. And don't try to pull any bullcrap on me cause I have ways to deal with those who tried to stiff me or rip me off…and believe me…you don't want to get on my bad side!" He said the last part with a low demonic voice looking straight at them with a gazed that almost made themselves crap their pants.
The three nodded nervously knowing he ment it.
"Good, now find your favorite and we can go from there. On the side of each weapon there's a sign that says what it is and what it does. Now get moving and find a weapon you like. And be quick about it, I got a sale to get to." The Demons nodded and went to find a weapon.
"My what a collection you have here, some look like one of those fancy sciences fiction comics I've seen in my life. Care to say how you got them all?" Alastor asked Boris.
"You know I'm a Merchant from another realm, I've travel to hundreds of worlds before setting shop here. And over that course I made deals in getting these things, there great bargaining chips for some of the rarer things I can't get here in Hell. Now then, why do you need these types of weapons? You going after some Uberdemon or something?" Boris asked with a small chuckle in his throat.
"Oh the prize is much more dangerous than any demon here, these fine fellows are going head to head with the Angel Slayer itself."
"That thing…now I feel sorry for those boys…there going to get slaughtered." He spoke in a soft tone.
"What seemed to change your mood?" Alastor asked somewhat confused by the sudden change.
"Unlike the majority here, I actually know what that thing is…and in all honesty, I don't think even these weapons can put that thing down. Some call it a force of unequal power and damn well there's a reason its called that. I've heard that thing taken on Gods and actually kill them. So yeah these boys are deader than dead at this point."
Alastor didn't show it but he was surprised to hear Boris actually heard about Godzilla or at least some of his reputation. But he supposes it wasn't that much of a stretch giving Boris has traveled around a lot like he said so the possibility of him at least hearing about Godzilla was factor. Deciding to dig a little more to see how much he knows about him.
"You don't say, what else do you know about it?"
"Not much from rumors and stories I've heard. Couldn't tell you if they are real or not. But if at least a quarter of what I've heard is true then as I said, these weapons might not be enough to take it down. In fact, I'll throw in some high-grade military weapons plus a light armor vehicle as well, no extra charge."
"My how unusually generous of you, so certain they will fail are you?" He asked with a playful tone.
"Like I said, these boys are as good as dead if they are going after this 'King of the Monsters' as I've been told its been called. I might as well give them at least a few short minutes of limited time they'll have. Once they get the weapons here, we'll go to the military section to grab a few of those. Then you can go on this suicidal mission of yours. We'll discuss the final details of our deal at a later time…provided you don't wind up dead."
"I never said I was going after this thing now did I?"
"No you didn't." Boris chuckled at that.
The two stood there waiting for the three to get their new toys. In the comfortable silence Alastor was thinking that his earlier thoughts were indeed correct. There was no chance in Hell these dudes would have an even a Vegas Winning chance against Godzilla. Now even more thanks to what Boris said. But again, he knew they had zero chances of dealing with Godzilla as all of this was meant to send a message to him and Moe.
And he couldn't wait to see the reaction from both them and the three decoys once it all plays out.
Oh what fun indeed!
And cut!
Looks like things are going to get spicy folks! Our good old boy got Cross, Bruce, and Tub to go into this suicidal task.
Man, I feel sorry for these dudes, they don't stand a snowball's chance in hell…heh…pun so intended.
Next time we see how the newly armed Demon fodder will handle against Godzilla? I want to say they will last…maybe five or so minutes, give or take a few seconds.
I also want to point out I might have miss a bit on what Alastor can do but I figured it was pretty close enough that I shouldn't get to much flak on this though I will hear out to those that say 'you fucked up on his character' and will take it to heart if needed.
Whelp I hope you all like this one. Please let me know what you think and I'll see you all in the next one. OUT!