Something In The Orange

Kit hesitated before knocking on Tess's bedroom door, involuntarily glancing down at the folded up piece of weatherstained parchment in his hand, feeling like it was a stick of dynamite he was carrying. Earlier, when Daisy had distractedly handed him the envelope marked with his name in bright green ink, he hadn't expected its contents to contain this. Michonne had urged him to wait until the morning, but Kit knew he wouldn't be able to sleep, not with this weighing upon his mind. Going on his customary evening jog outwith the walls hadn't steadied him like it usually did, not even when he'd headed further out to exhaust himself. He was still just as keyed up as he was before he'd left. At hearing Tess tiredly calling 'come in', he took a deep breath before pushing open the door, heart sinking at the bombshell he was about to drop on his niece.

Upon seeing her uncle's sombre face, a confused Tess slowly put down her knitting on the bed, where she had been sitting crosslegged for the past couple of hours, sporadically working on a blanket for Judith inbetween studying the anatomy and function of the ear canal. On reflex, she pushed her old plush unicorn, Sparkles, further underneath the pillows, even as her uncle already knew she still slept with it. But Kit didn't even notice, looking dead on his feet, the sight quelling her repressed resentment at being disturbed. It struck her afresh at how old and tired he seemed lately, losing his characteristic boyishness. His silver beard was bordering on unruly; dark circles etched under his grey eyes, Imogen's eyes. Kit was nearly fifty now, even as he carried himself like a much younger man, his dark curls becoming increasingly flecked with white, much to the detriment of his secret vanity.

After Kit had finished mending Cassidy's wardrobe door, Tess had gone out to call Carl in case he'd already arrived at the Commonwealth, but the temperamental radio had thrown another fit, forcing her to give up. Parts were scarce and in great demand, as were those who had experience in the maintenance of communication equipment. The Commonwealth was unable to help for once, leaving Alexandria to make do in the meantime, and sending for Eugene wasn't really an option right now. Aaron had then come over from Kit's with Gracie and the girls, allowing Tess to escape upstairs. Having time to herself was rare and it was something she struggled to prioritize. Even when the opportunity arose, she didn't always take it.

Since Daryl's departure, she'd managed to maintain the schedule of sorts that allowed her to haphazardly balance her medical studies and personal responsibilities, her aunt and uncle intensifying their assistance. The fact their help was probably the reason why she could cope was something Tess didn't want to face. Out of habit, Tess still consulted with Carl on occasion, and he more or less deferred to her decision-making - or at least appeared to despite being the elder, Tess knowing he was probably just humouring her. Sometimes she just suspected though he couldn't be bothered with the boring minutiae of their lives and as long his sisters were safe, he didn't want to know.

But her aunt and uncle were different, always checking in and keeping tabs on Tess, wanting her to run everything past them first. The issue of Cassidy's broken wardrobe was a case in point, Tess feeling Kit didn't think she had been capable of fixing it properly in the first place. Finding freedom from such scrutiny was part of why moving to the Commonwealth was so appealing. Yet it didn't occur to Tess she would come under the same kind of stricture from Ezekiel and Carol, Tess blindly believing they would be more liberal.

When it first became apparent Imogen's absence had spiralled into something else, the community had swiftly rallied around with words of support and casseroles left on the doorstep. They still didn't know the real reason why she was gone, believing the lie she was leading a diplomatic legation regarding concerns of the Commonwealth, an extended mission that gone unexpectedly awry. Before Imogen had departed, he neighbours had sprung a surprise party to celebrate her new job, Imogen having remained resolutely behind Alexandria's walls for so long now, seeing it as a fresh start for her. Tess would always tense at the memory; how they'd had to pretend to be happy their mother was leaving. Then Imogen's calls came less often, with letters taking longer to arrive before coming to a stop altogether. As time passed, the community's concern had faded into pitying looks and awkward silences, nobody daring to say what they were all thinking. In the end, life had gone on, and Tess felt it all came down to her to keep everything ticking over.

There were still days though when it all almost came tumbling down around her ears, but she kept on. As an experiment, she had also begun pulling together an alternative agenda, drafting a rough rota of sorts designed to help make it easier for her to run the house by assigning suitable chores to her sisters, spreading it out across the week so she wasn't always rushing around. As her mother would have said, they were now old and ugly enough to start taking on extra responsibilities, Tess determined to abide by the old maxim many hands made light work. She wasn't going to keep carrying them. Imogen had raised the girls to be self reliant and clear up after themselves, but it had always been an ongoing battle which Daryl and now Tess was taking on. But sometimes it was just easier and quicker to do shit herself than bawl her sisters out if they didn't bother their ass sometimes or forgot. Earlier, she had just given in and put away Judith's roller skates after all despite telling herself she wouldn't, too tired to even think about chivvying Judith into doing it instead.

In the midst of all this, Michonne sometimes stepped in, knowing she was treading on unsafe territory. Tess had taken over when Imogen had spiralled after finding out about Rick, but she'd then been forced to fall back, Imogen making alternative arrangements. Daryl had assumed sole guardianship of the girls, with Kit and Michonne helping him. He had made the effort to work alongside Tess, respecting she was now an adult, but he'd also made it more than clear he was the one in charge. But with Daryl now gone, the dynamic had changed, with Tess constantly trying to assume authority instead, leading to conflict. However, as time passed, Michonne had come to allow Tess to take the lead on occasion but not too often; happy otherwise to let Tess run the house as she pleased albeit with a little nudge here and there.

Recently, Michonne had become concerned that Tess had no hobbies or any kind of creative outlet beyond drawing brachial plexus and the like, Michonne firmly believing in the benefits of artistic self-expression, and she'd thus started guiding Tess in this direction. After messing about with different mediums, Tess had surprisingly taken to knitting, finding she had a knack for it. Plus it was portable and practical, allowing her to pick it up and put it down whenever she wanted. Knitting also helped soothe her jangled nerves, Tess losing herself in the monotony of the needles clicking together. She was now currently making blankets in different colors for each of her sisters, with poppy red for Judith and carnation pink for Daisy, before finishing with foam blue for Cassidy. She'd already made a bright butter yellow blanket for Sophia, which was now lying folded up in her bottom drawer, waiting to be posted.

But in the wake of Sophia's sudden removal to the Commonwealth, Tess couldn't bring herself to touch it, scared Sophia wouldn't live long enough to see it if her condition continued to deteriorate. She couldn't even correctly judge the severity of the situation but it had to be bad or near it at least if Carl had been moved to contact the Commonwealth in the first place. Now Tess had to keep constant control of herself, fighting the urge to up and leave Alexandria so she could be by her sister-in-law's side. But all Tess had been able to do was fire off terse notes to Carl, Sophia and Carol, and helplessly await their answers.

Forcing herself to focus, realizing she'd become lost in her head again, Tess then got up off the bed. Unbidden, her green gaze abrubtly fell upon the piece of paper Kit was clutching so tightly in his hand. Caught offguard, she froze, all the blood draining from her face. Swaying dangerously on the spot, she grabbed the upholstered headboard for support, holding herself upright. "Is it mom!?" she choked out, her reaction startling Kit. "Oh my God, it's mom!"

Kit stared at Tess, startled. Then he gathered himself, appalled at his own carelessness. Of course she would jump to that conclusion. "No, it isn't," he said quietly, motioning for her to sit down on the bed again, "it's nothing like that at all."

"Sophia!?"

"No."

At this, Tess finally obeyed, gingerly perching on the edge of the bed this time, heart feeling like it was going to thud out of her chest. With wide eyes, she watched as Kit drew up a chair, before sitting down with some difficulty, being almost big for it. Wordlessly, he then handed her the half empty glass of water from atop the bedside cabinet, indicating for her to drink it. Half out of her mind now, Tess all but blindly obeyed, its almost stale taste making her wince.

Kit nervously leaned back in his seat, ignoring its warning creaks beneath him whilst kicking himself again for being so careless. A little color was coming back to Tess's face now, easing his anxiety a fraction. For a moment, he studied her, tiredly noting yet again her strong resemblance to Negan. She was sporting a strong tan thanks to the unseasonable heat they were having; her long dark hair now recently cut to shoulder-length. Growing up, it had been down to her waist, Tess never allowing it to be cut except for the smallest trim. Now, she had decided otherwise, tired of it always getting in the way. When she impatiently tucked it behind her ears, Kit could see where they stuck out exactly like Negan's, throwing the resemblance into relief all over again.

As Tess finished drinking the last of the water, Kit glanced distractedly around her bedroom, its deep purple tones still striking him as depressing. It had once been a bright cheerful place, with its cream walls and three large front-facing windows letting in plenty of light. But when Tess was fifteen, Imogen had finally given into her daughter's demands for something different. She had painted the walls a dark lilac and hung up purple polka-dotted curtains, Daryl scavenging a matching rug for the bare floorboards. The curtains had long since been replaced with purple and white striped ones, whilst a vintage lavender and gold tapestry bedspread had been nailed up in a far corner to create a marquee effect, the old rug relegated to somewhere downstairs instead.

"Is – is – it Uncle Daryl? Tess then asked, gripping the glass like grim death. "What did he say?"

Kit glanced at Tess's trembling hands. "It's not Daryl either," he said, leaning over and taking the glass from her. "It's… it's about your dad, Teresa."

"Rick!?"

"No, no - I mean, Negan," Kit said, hesitating before handing the piece of folded up paper over to her.

Confused, Tess opened it up, brow furrowing. Spreading it wide on her lap, she smoothed out its worn lines, only to inexplicably see her father's face looking up at her. WANTED. In a daze, she read the rest of the print, their contents barely registering apart from a few words jumping out at her here and there. DO NOT APPROACH UNLESS ARMED. The portrait was rendered well enough for her to recognize Negan. But the longer she looked it, the more it strangely appeared off somehow. EXTREME VIOLENCE. Yet she could still see something of herself in the picture across the eyes; in the cast of his nose and chin. DO NOT TRUST HIM. No, she never had, not even when she had most wanted to.

Kit watched Tess study the WANTED poster, noting how her hands were now violently shaking, leaving him helpless to help her. There was nothing he could do but be here for her, and even that wasn't enough. If only Imogen was home… But she was gone, and sometimes he thought she'd never come back. It had taken a lot of effort to work up the courage to come over here in the first place, knowing how much it would hurt Tess despite the apparent indifference she displayed whenever Negan was mentioned. Maggie hadn't written to him for a while now so when he'd seen the envelope in Daisy's hand, he knew trouble was in the wind. He had gone straight to Michonne, opening the envelope in front of her, needing her support. Inside, Maggie had also included a brief apologetic note, but the WANTED poster was more than enough to explain Negan's abrupt absence.

Months ago, during a radio call, Kit had mentioned in passing to Maggie that Negan had uncharacteristically dropped out of contact with his daughter, and that he suspected Negan was up to his ears in shit. He had warned Maggie should be on her guard in case Negan showed up in her neck of the woods, looking for a bail-out. After the fall of the Commonwealth, Negan had deliberately kept away from the communities he'd once enslaved and anyone connected to them. His only contact had been with Tess at all times. Kit had consequently come to suspect Negan had cut off Tess for a reason; to protect her from whatever folly he'd found himself in, the WANTED poster only serving to confirm his suspicions.

"Has Annie ever implied Negan was in trouble?" Kit then asked, making Tess glance up. "Anything at all?"

Tess hesitated, remembering Michonne's warning about jumping to conclusions, realising too late her aunt was perhaps right. "No, not once," she then admitted. "She just acts like everything is okay when we both know it isn't."

"Sounds to me like she's hiding something."

Tess tilted her head back, exhaling sharply. "Maybe, probably, yeah. I mean, Dad stopped writing around the same time Annie started moving around, but I just thought he'd fucked everything up with Annie; that she'd left him and taken the baby," she replied. "It's not like I can write and ask her either. She's constantly moving from pillar to post and I have to guess where she is from the postmark – but then she's off again, so that's no help."

"Well, maybe your dad is with her," Kit suggested, resting his palms on his knees. "It would hold up that he was, especially with Annie moving around so much. If Negan's on the run, it would stand to reason he'd take his wife and son with him. Maybe that's why she writes, and he doesn't, not wanting to leave a trail."

"I don't know, maybe," Tess said wearily, "but then again, maybe he sent them away to be safe. Maybe Annie's moving around so the law don't find her. Or maybe she just kicked my dad to the kerb, took off and she doesn't want to tell me why."

"Perhaps," Kit admitted. "She might think she's protecting you that way."

Tess stared at the WANTED poster still on her lap, mouth curling down in the corners. She didn't have any real relationship with her stepmother beyond a written one, having only met her in person a handful of times. She hadn't even met her baby brother yet, only watching him grow up from afar through blurry photographs. But they were her family regardless even as Negan had apparently ripped them apart. "Where did you get this?" she suddenly demanded, holding the poster aloft.

Kit hesitated. "Maggie," he then admitted, spreading his hands wide, "she… she sent it to me today – it was inside Daisy's letter."

"Daisy!?" Tess snapped. "She knows about this!?"

"No, no, no," Kit backtracked, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. "It was inside a sealed envelope. She gave it to me, unopened. Maggie sometimes does that when she writes to your sisters" –

- "What the hell for!?"

"To be careful I guess, I don't know."

"What, she's having my dad watched then?" Tess pressed, angry now. "How long has she known about this?"

"She's not been having your dad watched," Kit flared up, "at least not until I told her he'd dropped off the radar."

"You warned her!?"

"Of course I damn well did," Kit snapped. "The Hilltop isn't that far from where Negan pitched up to play house, Tess."

Tess's jaw tightened. "Are this NBF poking around the Hilltop for him, then?" she asked uncertainly, studying the official red stamp of the New Babylon Federation authorizing her father's capture. She didn't know much about the territory except they had been granted emancipation from the Commonwealth. But the Hilltop was now based near Manhattan which was in the NBF's vicinity, so it was a feasible fear on her part.

"I don't know," Kit said slowly, "perhaps in a generic capacity – you know, interviewing everyone in the local and surrounding areas. Maggie didn't mention anything about it - doesn't mean to say it hasn't happened in the meantime. Those posters apparently only started getting put up around the New Babylon area a couple of weeks ago. Someone from the Hilltop was doing a supply drop-off there and brought it back. I'm deducing whatever crime he committed occurred inside New Babylon's jurisdiction though."

Tess didn't respond, merely staring down at the WANTED poster, looking as if she wanted to tear it apart.

Exhaling sharply, Kit ran his hand across his bearded face, feeling like a thousand years old. He wasn't sure how much more Tess could take with the way things were going. Something was going to have to give. And whatever was happening in New Babylon was bound to have repercussions that would ripple all the way to Alexandria. As leaders of Alexandria, Kit and Michonne kept abreast of current events, and had long known New Babylon was a thorn in the Commonwealth's side. Alexandria was not a colony of the Commonwealth, but it was its staunch ally regardless, and this latest development would have to be reported to Ezekiel if Maggie hadn't enlightened him already. But with the radio down, an express would have to be sent by outrider. He was already expecting an answer from Ezekiel over a matter pertaining to Imogen's absence, Michonne not knowing about that either, Kit keeping it to himself for the time being.

There had already been a few minor political skirmishes between the Commonwealth and the New Babylon Federation, Ezekiel not appreciating the brutal way the marshals dispensed justice and how they employed spectacle to get their point across on occasion. Despite Ezekiel emancipating the territory and accommodating them at every turn, he suspected they just saw him as a genial fool they could rook. Intel had reported rumors of them secretly planning to expand their borders at the expense of the Commonwealth's, with an eye specifically fixed on their resources. Despite now trading and existing alongside each other, New Babylon was getting greedy, overreaching itself instead of remaining equal.

"There's a good chance the marshals might come to Alexandria, Teresa," Kit then said, making her glance up at him again. "They might not, and I hope so, but it's very probable they will. The marshals aren't going to leave any stone unturned searching for him. I believe that's why Negan cut off contact with you so you wouldn't be dragged into his mess. Maybe he sent Annie away for the same reason. I just don't know. But if someone lets slip he has a daughter out there, then that's it."

"But I haven't heard from Dad for months," Tess said, confused. "Wouldn't they have shown up by now if somebody blabbed? I mean, why it has taken so long in general? He's been AWOL for months and they're only looking for him now!?"

"It looks as if Negan's thoroughly covered his tracks when it came to you – all we can do is hope it holds out. Whatever happened though, maybe they couldn't pin it on him back then," Kit said uneasily, "but now they can. I don't really know. Maybe they have a witness" –

- "Or, maybe Maggie's sold him down the river and she's playing innocent by sending you that poster."

Kit stared at Tess, unable to credence what she had just said. "She wouldn't do that, Tess," he then said, straightening up, "despite the temptation to, I grant you."

"Why wouldn't she though?" Tess challenged. "Like you say, she has every reason to, right?"

"For your sake, she wouldn't."

"Well, I just don't think she'd turn down the chance to fuck me over to get even with Negan" -

- "Teresa!" Kit reprimanded, face paling. "That's enough!"

"And I've heard enough!" Tess yelled back, getting to her feet. "Quit the bullshit, man!"

"Park your arse!" Kit ordered. "NOW!"

Tess stood there for a long moment, before finally obeying for once, face sullen. "Don't tell me what to do," she complained even as she complied, "I'm not a kid anymore."

Kit didn't even bother to deem this with a response. "Maggie isn't playing some kind of mind game with you, Teresa," he snapped. "She's just trying to protect you from your scumbag of a father, not bloody score points!"

"She's protecting me!?" Tess scoffed, unable to believe what she was hearing. "My dad killed her husband! He's the reason Glenn is dead! It's my fault, Uncle Kit, all of it!"

Kit stared at her, shocked. Immediately all his ire left him in the face of such an unexpected admission. "Tess… it's not your fault," he said slowly, kneeling down in front of her, taking her trembling hands in his. "None of it is or was. Ever. How on earth did you get that idea into your head?"

"It's not in my head," Tess protested, suddenly sounding like a little girl again, "it's real. I know it's real. I could see it in Maggie's eyes every time she looked at me."

Kit leaned back on his haunches, still shocked. He knew there was tension between Maggie and Tess. And of course there would be. As Tess put it, she was the daughter of the man who killed Glenn, a living, constant, reminder. But not once had Maggie intimated she held Tess to account for being her father's daughter. She'd only expressed hurt that the little girl had drawn away from her, the distance between them only growing as Tess matured. Every year she would faithfully send Tess birthday and Christmas presents that would remain unopened and unacknowledged by Tess. Otherwise, there was no contact between them, Maggie reluctantly respecting Tess's unspoken desire to be let alone. Yet Tess seemed to think Maggie was the one who had cut cords, her tormented mind twisting the truth.

"Tess, your aunt cares about you" –

- "No, she doesn't!" Tess snapped, tearing her hands out of his. "How can she after what my dad did!?"

"She does, Tess!" Kit pressed, grabbing her wrists this time, forcing her to fall still. "She always has!"

"Stop defending her!"

"What, did she say outright it was your fault?" Kit snapped, tightening his grip as Tess made to move away once more. "Did she ever tell you that?"

"No, she never said anything," Tess said, still trying to pull herself free, "but she didn't have to."

Kit suddenly let go of Tess, causing her to fall back. "Maggie thinks you hate her," he said abrubtly, startling her. "That you've hated her for years. That you picked a side she never asked you to. Yes, your dad killed Glenn, but she understood he was still your dad" –

- "Did she tell you she came to kill Negan that day Rick blew up the bridge?" Tess blurted out, shocking Kit again. "That she would have if mom hadn't stopped her? She and Uncle Daryl had it all planned out. But mom found out, covered it up. She didn't know I heard them. Mom begged Maggie to think about me, but she didn't care. She didn't care I was having nightmares about mom having my dad executed. I didn't want anything to do with him back then, but he was still my dad and I… I didn't want him to die. Oh, I know Maggie's went for him a few times. But that was the worst. And for years afterwards, I'd always tell myself that Maggie was in the right that day. And she was. But she didn't care about me that day or any day since then, Uncle Kit."

Kit absorbed this revelation, the anguish in Tess's eyes making it impossible for him to see it as anything but truth. "Tess… I didn't know about this," he said wearily, carefully sitting back down on the chair, "your mother never said anything, never even hinted…" He paused, remembering the dark days that had followed after Rick had blown the bridge up. "But whatever Maggie did then, she… she had good reason and you know that. I'm not going to insult your intelligence, Tess, and lie. What Negan did was heinous. Maggie… Having to suffer knowing Negan was alive - seeing him swagger around here, acting like the big shot, making up to your mother? How he got to walk away and start over? To have a life? And all right on her doorstep? God, Tess, Maggie had every right to come here and do what she did, each and every time. I'm just sorry about how it's impacted you. If I could take all that on myself, to spare you, I would. But it's not because she blames you."

But Tess just shook her head, refusing to hear him, not wanting to.

"Tess, all this between you and Maggie has to stop," Kit said abrubtly, making Tess stiffen, "it has to. There's no other way around it."

"It can't though!" Tess said incredulously, shocked into speaking. "You can't change the past!"

"It's not about changing the past," Kit said, voice cracking, "it's about making you understand" –

- "There's nothing to understand that I don't already" –

- "Tess, Maggie doesn't understand either!" Kit exploded. "She has the wrong end of the stick just as much as you do! That woman would lay her life down for you, for chrissake! She stays away because that's what you want. That's why she doesn't visit with Hershel. But she still sends all those bloody presents year after year even as it's an exercise in pure pointlessness." He ran his hand over his face, exhausted. "It just all has to stop, Tess. Especially now with Rick gone and your mother now out there somewhere, Daryl too. We need to pull together and not apart – you can't let Negan ruin the rest of your life - or your sisters' lives either."

His words hung in the air, threatening to ignite the tense atmosphere, Tess more than understanding their implication. Her jaw tightened, thinking of her little brother, how Negan had apparently screwed up his life already. But Joshua was now far away and out of her reach. Her sisters were a different story, not that she was going to admit this to her uncle. "Like I've said before, Daisy doesn't need to go to the Hilltop," she then said, trying to brazen it out, "and that's nothing to do with my dad. She can keep working with the horses here, and later, Carl said he can have her at the Kingdom when she's older. It doesn't have to be the Hilltop. "

"It's bloody everything to do with Negan, my girl," Kit retorted, pointing at her. "You don't want Daisy at the Hilltop because of Maggie, right? Not even on a visit. Because then you'd need to deal with Maggie. And you don't want to because of your dad. That's it in a nutshell, right?"

At this, Tess looked away, caught in the lie.

"I'm not your mother, Tess," Kit said, leaning forwards again, "prepared to let things drag on in the name of keeping the peace. Imogen got into the bad habit of doing that and it's not doing anyone any favors. Personally, I always thought she was just storing up trouble for the future." He pulled out a faded sheet of pink paper folded in half, before throwing it into Tess's lap, who caught it on reflex. "And guess what?" he continued. "I was right."

He paused, watching Tess glance over the content of the letter, all the blood draining from her face. "A while ago, Daisy wrote to Maggie about moving outright to the Hilltop, permanently," he explained. "Behind my back, might I add. Maggie contacted me; passing on the letter in question – what you're holding right now - concerned Daisy would do something drastic. You already know Maggie long promised your mother she'd host Daisy and Cassidy when the time came, but not before then. But as you can see, Daisy is taking matters into her own hands."

Kit took a deep breath, watching Tess crumple the paper in her hand, the sight only serving to stiffen his resolve.

"In the end, we were forced to make a compromise; that I'd allow Daisy to make an extended visit to the Hilltop at some vaguely interminable point in time. I'd hoped we'd be able to put Daisy off for a bit longer, especially under the current circumstances. I don't think it's the right time considering everything. But your sister is now taking us at our word, cranking up the pressure and frankly, Tess, something has to give sooner or later. And maybe it's not ever going to be the right time. I know your mother's out there somewhere, but life carries on regardless. Your sisters are growing up. Things are changing whether we want them to or not. And since Imogen isn't here, I'm the one who has to make the final decision."

Tess stared down at the letter, barely aware now of Daisy's closely scrawled sentences, the black ink blotchy. "You don't have the right," she then said through gritted teeth, "I'm Daisy's guardian now Daryl's gone."

"No, you're not," Kit said simply, "I am. And so Michonne. We always have been. You know that, Tess. And anyways Daryl was only ever merely a de facto guardian."

"Doesn't matter – Daryl's gone and I'm here, so do the math."

"Don't be so goddamn childish," Kit said wearily, closing his eyes. "Especially when you're claiming to be in charge here."

"Well, I hardly see Carl coming to help, do you!?"

"Your bloody mother expected Carl to immediately uproot his family and abandon his responsibilities at the Kingdom to go on what was possibly a wild goose chase," Kit snapped, losing patience. "She couched it badly by not speaking him directly. So of course Carl went off on one. Said she was crazy and insulting his dad's memory. That she was a bad mother, fucking off to chase ghosts. 'Lori never would have'," he mimicked, mincing his shoulders, "and so on. Predictably, Imogen flipped out. I said to your mother that Carl didn't need to come here, that Michonne and I would take care of you and your sisters. But your mother thought we wouldn't be able to cope. Pure folderol. She went running to Daryl putting his back up. In the end, it all got sorted out but by God, your mother was as mad as a box of cats half the time, Teresa."

At this, Tess wordlessly folded the letter in half, reluctantly contemplating Carl's defection. He had stayed away from Alexandria ever since Imogen had dropped the bombshell Rick could be alive, not that he'd ever came to visit often anyways. After Judith had vetoed to stay with Imogen, Carl had more or less kept his distance apart from coming over for the odd Christmas. Daryl hadn't been impressed by Carl's attitude, saying he was acting like a little dick. But Tess suspected Carl was just trying to protect himself by denying the possibility his father was alive. Rick's death had rocked Carl to the core, as well as ripping the family apart for Rick had always been the buffer between Carl and Imogen.

Yet deep down Tess knew Imogen had asked too much of Carl and had also handled approaching him badly. Carl had his own family to think about, as well as the wider community he took care of at the Kingdom. But Tess and her sisters were his family too and all Carl had done since then was act as if Imogen was on holiday and everything was completely normal; not that their entire existence hadn't been turned upside down.

"Then why did you let mom leave then if she wasn't compis mentis?" Tess then said slowly, casting the letter aside onto her bed.

"Come on, I couldn't have stopped her, even if I'd tried," Kit retorted, "and when was she ever in her right mind anyways? Imogen has been unstable for a long time – we all are. Not one of us is completely right upstairs."

"You still should have stopped her!"

"I had to let her go," Kit reiterated. "It was either that or watch her finally fall apart. You more than know that" -

- "Still should have done something."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, you told her to go."

"Because she had to!" Tess spat. "Dad's out there! If she hadn't gone, I would have! And I still would! It's Dad for fuck's sake! But she and him had to make that dumb promise" –

-"You're not a parent, Tess," Kit cut across her, leaning back. "You don't understand what it was like for them, trying to keep their children safe at the end of the world. No matter what happened, one of them had to stay alive, to go on for your sakes."

"Well, I'm never going to be a parent," Tess said smartly, "and I don't want to be either."

Kit spread his hands wide again, so obviously humouring her, Tess nearly laughed out loud at his arrogance.

"Why are you not out there looking for mom anyways?" Tess then challenged, switching tack. "You could have even gone with her in the first place!"

"I couldn't."

"You could have!" Tess cried. "Instead sitting on your fat ass in front of me right now!"

"Because she bloody made me promise not to!" Kit yelled, finally losing his cool, frightening Tess into silence. "Not just so there would at least still be somebody left to be around for you and your sisters, but so I wouldn't get myself killed. I've always known and so has she that I'm cut from a very different cloth from her. Out there… I'm useless. But here, I'm not. I can take care of you all. Yet I would have gone after her regardless. So she made me promise, Tess."

Tess shrank into herself, the wind completely knocked out of her. "She… she was protecting you," she said in a small voice, fists clenching, fingertips biting into her flesh.

Kit looked down at the ground, suddenly unable to speak, remembering Imogen's angry face as she extracted that promise from him. He used to pride himself on taking care of his family, but then the world had ended, and it had been Imogen who taken care of them, Kit too broken to. But he would have followed Imogen to the end and she knew this. She had been driven half mad with guilt and grief over Rick and the knowledge he might still be alive after all this time. Walking out on her children – she had refused to put it any other way – knowing she might not come back, had been the final straw. She could and would not have her brother's blood on her hands on top of everything else. "Look, I just came here to tell you about Negan," he then said quietly, wringing his hands, "I didn't intend – just it's not the time to have this… discussion"

Tess looked down at the ground, jaw trembling. "Can we just call it a night, man?" she said wearily, wanting more than anything to be alone right now. "I can't deal with all your bullshit right now, not on top of everything about my dad."

Kit hesitated before standing up, figuring Tess was a fight he would never win, even as he would never stop trying to. But he would have to make her understand that Maggie didn't hold her responsible for Glenn's death. That he couldn't let go. But that was a battle for another day. "Michonne and I already decided tonight that Daisy can go to the Hilltop," he announced abrubtly, reasoning he had nothing to lose, not now. "We think it's for the best in terms of helping Daisy figure out her future. But to be honest it's part of a bigger conversation we all need to sit down and have," Kit continued, ignoring Tess's bloodless face. "I know you already raised the idea with Daryl about moving to the Commonwealth and he vetoed it, but it may come to that, especially when considering completing Judith's apprenticeship in security and your own studies. If further down the line, Judith wants to go, she can. And so can you. Alexandria just isn't enough anymore – it can't impart the knowledge that you need to advance, Tess."

With that, Kit then left, seeing Tess wasn't going to listen even as she heard him.

Stirring herself, Tess picked up Daisy's letter again, and then the WANTED poster, holding one in each hand as if she could reconcile two opposing forces.

These things eat at your bones

And drive your young mind crazy…