V. Big Trouble in Little Middleton

In the distant dark horizon Drakken watched as Shego's car sped off into the distance merging with the service road into downtown Middleton. It was quite a drive, but she was really looking forward to this show. As he tried to remember the name of that club she enjoyed, he received a call on his cell phone. He ripped it out from his robe pocket and flicked it open.

"Dr. Drakken speaking."

"Drew! Pick up!"

"What do you want, Ed?"

From the speaker there were the harsh sounds of garbled music and shouting.

"Oh! Dude! Don't tell me you're just hiding out and sulking at home tonight! The best metal show this month is happening at the Subsonic! RazorRot, Carnage Collector, GearGore, and like, even more dude! Seriously!"

"Oh-ho. Seriously?", Drakken said sarcastically, adjusting his phone, clutching it between the side of his face and his shoulder to have both hands free. He began to tinker with the stove.

"Yeah, dude! For shaaw. And your lil lady just started a pit. Heeelll yeah!"

"That seems about right. Well Ed, don't let me get ya down and keep you from- that."

"Never brotherrr! Always got time to talk to the Drewster."

"Ah, well, the Drewster has to go, bye, Ed."

"Bah! Whatever. Later dude!"

A sharp disconnect was heard through the other end as Drakken sighed. He closed his phone and looked listless. Drakken had a headache and exhaled slowly. He really wanted to try again with his family, to make the most of it- in some capacity.

And, "your lil' lady"? Really? He knew that his cousin knew that Shego was no one's "little lady". Much less his.

Drakken opened the fridge to get something to eat, his frame slumped. He rubbed his forehead with his robe's sleeve. As he searched with heavy eyes and head, he heard a little meow. Jade was hungry for food. She looked up at him and meowed again, her little head bobbing for each meow. Her pudgy body fidgeted as she focused on him.

"You hammy little cat! There is no cheese! You- and I- ate all of it this week. And I am not going to get more for you. You can only have a half-slice a day". Drakken scratched his scalp. His hair was in a very messy state, though usually spikey and voluminous, it took on a disheveled, flat, and clumpy look. He reflected on being in such a malaise, and dramatically pondered what is was to be well. He took momentary glances at Jade, who did not break her stare. She had stopped yowling. He plopped down on a stool on the kitchen island. It had occurred to him that he had been eating a lot less than usual lately and attributed it to the stress he had been under recently. Something about being "good" and pleasant in the public eye, being put under a microscope, had naturally made him quite anxious and frustrated.

Jade's eyes began to glow. Drakken gasped, mortified. He did not know Shego and Amy had given the cat magic. Denying Jade her beloved provolone was not a good move. Drakken felt violently uneasy by Jade's reaction. Jade turned to the side and yowled.

Oddly enough, he was certain she understood it was not his fault- or at least- he hoped.

She snarled and hissed at the air, not taking no for an answer. If the world was going to be cruel to her then she was going to be cruel back. And there was no going back, and through some involuntary genetic magic- there was going to be more than enough cruelty to return. Though Jade was but a cat, and it was odd to impose any type of human complexities and emotional nuances to her feline antics, he did so anyway. Not wanting to invite any undo violence toward himself, he simply allowed her out the door that had been open to the breeze and let her out of his vicinity. He shielded his eyes as Jade dashed out, as fast and as hasty as a cat of her size could. She bounded unnaturally quickly out into the brush, her green light haunting the trees and brush, and her light became fainter and fainter in his view. He felt guilty, but only slightly, and not enough to tell Shego right away or go after Jade himself. He waited listlessly. His cowardice had resulted in yet another major problem for him.

His worry began to build, and though he was not one to feel any remorse for being selfish and careless, much less for malice, he did feel for Shego, who would certainly be heartbroken (and furious), if she found out Jade was missing. He dialed her on his phone. The call sound on the other end reverberated in the large den.

"What do you want?!". The pounding music on the other side reminded him that she was out having fun and did not want him disturbing her. She did invite him, however, and he reminded himself of this fact as not to become frustrated with her.

"I have some bad news, Jade seems to have ran off into the green belt… I tried going after her but she just- vanished!"

"HOW COULD YOU LOSE TRACK OF HER? SHE'S FREAKIN' HUGE!"

"I know, I know, I am sick and I didn't notice her until I heard her."

"Why didn't you run after her?! And you're sure none of the henchmen noticed her?"

"I guess not. I need to fire those- asswipes," his efforts to pass on blame seemed to have worked. She likely would be angry at him later, but that was future him's problem, wasn't it? At that moment, he regretted his refusal of her invitation. Even though he had never been one for clubbing and live music, it would have been loads more fun than this.

She ended the call abruptly.

Those twenty minutes went by all too quickly.

…

"WHERE DID SHE GO?". Shego burst through the doors, within her a dangerous combination of fear, worry, and anger. Drakken tried to match her energy, though his depressed frame was not able to project the same energy. "The Ham ran into the brush! I tried to catch her but I couldn't see her by the time I realized she had disappeared, she was out of my view entirely." Shego did not totally buy his story, but she had greater patience with him as they had grown closer. She calmed herself. "I don't care what you did or didn't do right now. You're coming with me, 'sickness' and all!".

He did not protest beyond a tired groan as he put on his boots and trench coat, tying his hair into a ponytail. Out the door into the dark they went. Drakken snapped and one of his drones followed him, the light from it's "eye" functioning as a torch. The outside was foggy and the sky was clear, and into the brush they began their search. From behind them a few henchmen watched on, then, confused, they turned to each other. They grumbled and went back in.

"One would think it would be quite easy to find a cat of her- ", he paused, "-rotundity".

Shego shook her head and continued her search, making kissing sounds. He refused to make those sounds and called her name with her.

"Jade!" "Jade!" "Jade!" "Jaaade!" "JADE!" "Jade!"

There was rustling nearby, and eagerly, they both approached the bush. A neon green glow radiated from within it, covering both of them in eerie, dappled light, creating a truly surreal atmosphere. The glow faded and the rustling moved to another area. Shego lunged forward to grab at Jade. She fell flat, and there was no kitty. Suddenly, they heard a strange chattering sound. But it came from above.

"OH WHAT HAVE I DONE! JADE! I'M SORRY! I SHOULD HAVE BOUGHT MORE- PROVALONEEE!", Drakken cried. He was utterly shocked, as was Shego. Jade was levitating, her eyes glowing, and her paws alight with green plasma. She hissed at him but moved on. It was possible that under the magical mutations within her that now overcame Jade, Jade still was her cuddly self. Jade floated past them towards the greenbelt, closer to the nearby neighborhood. She then picked up speed and flew with an incredible speed. Her flight, though short, was strange...

Shego laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed. "AH HA HA HA HA! What the hell is going on with her?". Drakken, still in a state of utter shock and terror, remained frozen in bewilderment. "Shego, how is that funny?". "She looks like a cat balloon!". He paused and held his chin thoughtfully. "Ha!... Ah Ha Ha! That she does!" He pointed upwards gesturally.

Jade glided further into the large brush, looking forward blankly, her eyes totally glowing with rage. "Uh- where is she going?" Drakken asked uselessly.

"How the hell should I know? We probably aren't much good on foot- lets get in my car, I left it parked over there."

"Wouldn't it be faster to take the hover craft?"

"And scare Jade off, where she'll run further near the populated areas?" Shego replied. She always made it seem as though it was common knowledge, and that she was correct. Admittedly, this was often the case, and in recent times Drakken began to understand her attitude. Shego grabbed his wrist with a harsh jerk, and he followed behind her, running towards her new car. His heart skipped a beat as he silently admired her strength. While he wasn't sickly or horribly out of shape, he wasn't nearly as athletic and adept as her.

She elegantly leaped in the driver's seat, and started the car, fumbling her keys a little bit. He noticed she was panicking, which was incredibly rare for her. Nervousness was just not Shego. He awkwardly tumbled over the door into the convertible, his feet in the air for a brief moment before he righted himself, in doing so bumping into Shego. She was annoyed by his clumsiness as per usual. Just before he had fully sat up, adjusting his hair, the car lunged forward and violently stopped, causing his head to slam into the dash.

"GOT-GODAMIT, SHEGO!"

Shego laughed as he rubbed his head. He snarled at her.

"Just go! Follow the damn cat!"

"Jade is over there!"

Just then, she leaned over him to look closer at the passenger side view. He smelled liquor on her breath, taken aback by it. He knew she liked to party- so it wasn't a surprise, he just really did not want to die tonight with her behind the wheel.

"Oh, AHCK! Shego, you've been drinking! Get out of the driver's seat."

"Hell no! I'm not letting you drive my baby. You're not much better sober!"

"SHEEG-"

She took it out of park and slammed on the gas, ripping out of the back drive way of the lair. Even the incredibly well-engineered car tipped slightly as it slipped to turn sharply at such a speed. He clicked in his seat belt and noticed she wasn't wearing hers.

"If you're going to do this, at least wear your bloody seatbelt!" he shouted over the buffering air.

"Fine! Just- can you do it? I'm trying to look out for Jade!"

He swallowed. Something about that request made him uncomfortable, though it nonetheless needed to be done. Just then he spotted a glowing, flying Jade, who's radioactive aura had surrounded her feline form. Jade was now a round, cat-shaped spec in the sky, and sharply turned further into the brush. As Shego swerved this way and that, slightly impaired, Drakken was not allowed respite from the terror of falling off the bridge over the river and felt himself clutching the dash. He cried out when she went into the other lane, threatening their safety again.

His arms still reached in vein toward Shego's seatbelt to get her buckled in. He readjusted himself and resigned himself to the idea that he would have to get much closer to her. He felt his torso twisting over the middle console to reach across her. His form strained to completely reach the other side of her with the hectic speed of the vehicle, the buffering deafening him as he moved. He grabbed the seatbelt from her shoulder, ducking underneath her view as she shifted to the side to see the road. He dared not linger in this moment, but felt lightheaded from the brisk air, and pulled it across her. He tried not to think too much of it any longer, and clicked the belt in. Thank goodness for that…

"Thanks Drakken!".

She served onto the highway, crossing three lanes in a row.

"So this is how it ends," he muttered, silenced by the violent buffering of the air. His face had become flat and somewhat defeated, despite all of his adrenaline coursing through his body. There was nothing he could do, he was quite literally in for the ride. That damn cat was probably back home anyway.

Was this such a bad way to go out, though? Beside his partner in crime, on this beautiful night, knowing that while she was angry with him, she needed him by her side. His thoughts, as they often were, were cut off by action. Just as the next exit appeared and she rapidly decelerated the Corvette, a bright glow began to grow on the horizon. It was green, bright, like the inferno that came from Shego's hands. A supernatural power. A massive fire had broken out, in the green-belt, the autumn trees, bare and already in hibernation, were now on fire. Drakken gasped.

"BWAHAHA! JADE IS ONE OF US!"

Jade was a supervillain, just like her owners.

"OH MY GOD!", Shego shrieked, "JADE!"

Just then Shego noticed a sharp thumping and buffering overhead in another direction. A helicopter appeared above. It was from Global Justice, the symbol across the body of the vehicle ominously over them. Shego sped quickly off onto the service road, nearer to the brush, and on the way towards the inferno. Drakken gasped, within that helicopter he could have sworn to have seen his old nemesis.

In the blistering heat, almost too hot to stand, they stopped askew and got out of the car to look for Jade. The lights from the helicopter became closer and closer. Out of fear Shego began to panic, frantically searching for Jade. Drakken had an idea. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small mechanism, which emitted a laser, a small dot. He circled it near him and Shego, and she watched in desperation for Jade to appear. She felt profound despair, as the thought of Jade being dead crossed her mind in terrifying ways.

From the flames, the chubby form of Jade emerged. She darted playfully toward the spot. Drakken slowly moved it to the back seat of the convertible. Somehow, and rather fortunately, Jade tired after leaping into the car, scratching the seats just to get in. She fell still in the back seat, at peace in front of the grand destruction she had caused.

"Shego, get in the passenger seat!" Drakken shouted.

In a rare display of obedience, Shego ran and got inside, grabbing Jade with a groan, and petting her while securing a grip on the portly kitty. She smacked Jade on the bottom lightly in disappointment. "You naughty cat! Uh-uh! Bad kitty!" Drakken jumped into the driver's seat and cautiously began to get onto the road again. Shego's face relaxed. "I can't stay mad at you baby girl. But don't do ANYTHING like this again!". Jade meowed cluelessly.

She turned to Drakken, who seemed to be detached from the situation. She noticed his strange colouring in the blue moonlight, and how bizarre it was to everyone else. This side of his face had not been disfigured by a scar, and so remained it's angular self. She looked at him for longer, and he noticed, awkwardly turning to her slightly, his eyes still fixed forward.

"All this over some bloody cheese, did you know that?"

"Yeah? What a greedy kitty, yes you are!"

"Little glutton."

"Well, we need to help her get into shape, huh?"

"Shego, she's your cat. Puddles is as fit as a fiddle."

"Aw, come on, I need you on my side!"

He looked at Jade, then at her. He felt himself not wanting to look away. He didn't know what to do with that feeling. She was, to most anyone, conventionally beautiful. And she certainly was to him too.

"This is a pretty sweet ride!"

"Yeah. Pretty neat."

He smiled slightly.

The helicopter retreated as firefighters and state authorities moved in. Shego watched on intently as they moved further and further back towards the lair. She held Jade upright and cuddled her tightly. She nuzzled Shego and snuggled to her softly, fidgeting now and then as the air blew in her fur. Shego was so glad she was okay. Her worries were for no one else but the cat, and as though nothing had happened, they slowed down in the vehicle as Drakken had resigned himself to obeying traffic laws when he could.

"So, how was the uh, show?".

"It was pretty great. Your cousin Ed was there. He asked me how you were doing. Oddly enough, he seems to be less… pushy these days. He actually really wants to see you. Though, I might argue it might just be his way of trying to apologize for himself to me, but-"

Something softened in Drakken's visage as he lost himself as he drove. He looked a bit regretful, and somewhat contemplative. "He does, doesn't he?". This time he felt something else he didn't like to feel, a longing to have a friend, to have a family. And more profoundly, a happiness that his cousin really wanted to spend time with him. But he stopped after that.

"Did you two have fun? All that moshing- and shouting, and what-have-you? I think I might enjoy that metal stuff too."

"Oh, yeah, yeah, until this shit happened. And, you might, it's a good way to let loose."

"Yeah, well, it happens. I guess."

How Jade had travelled so far in so little time was strange enough, though the more unsettling questions revolved around the power to destroy that Jade had within her. Was this DNAmy's doing?

A/N

I think I might be creating one of the longest single stories for the Drakken and Shego ship. I wanted their romance to be very introspective and slow-burn style! :3 I think they are just the cutest. I wanted to weave in some things concerning their respective families in this, because their emotional states were so fun to write about!