Connie and the B-Team: The Reboot

Author: Feraligreater328

Chapter 4: Oops

At the hospital…

Doctor Priyanka Maheswaran sat in her examination chair and gave her daughter a long, hard look. She crossed her arms over her chest and frowned. "You got blasted in the face by…a steam vent?"

Connie, still blind, nodded as if she had just admitted to the most standard thing in the world. "Yes ma'am. That's exactly what happened."

Dr. Maheswaran turned in her chair. "And you can corroborate this?"

Lapis was slumped in her chair. She groaned and squeezed her bicep, unable to look the doctor in the eye. "Y-Yes ma'am. I'm…so sorry that we got your daughter hurt…"

Connie was quick to speak up. "No! This isn't anyone's fault, Mom! It was just an accident while we were trying to stop a volcanic eruption in Little Homeworld."

Dr. Maheswaran sighed and rubbed her face. "I'm not blaming anyone here. This is pretty tame compared to some of the things I've seen since you and Steven got married. Just give me one second…"

The doctor turned in her chair and began to rummage in a small biohazard refrigerator beneath the counter. As she did, Connie turned to Lapis and shot an "okay" sign. On the other side of the room, Lapis cocked her head. "Connie, why are you saying okay to a wall?"

Connie flinched, blushing hard and turning around. "N-No reason."

Her mother returned and ran her fingers over her daughter's scorched eyes. She sighed. "I'm going to be a white-haired witch before I see my first grandchild…"

Connie flinched, looking mortified. "M-Mom!"

Priyanka shook her head. "Sorry. That was an inside thought, dear. Now, let's fix your eyes…"

Lapis was confused. "How are you going to do that?"

The doctor twisted a lid off of a small vial, pulling out a cotton swab and dipping it in. "I keep a small vial of Steven's spit handy just in case of any grievous injuries that modern human medicine cannot fix. If I didn't have this, Connie would be permanently blind."

Priyanka began to swab the frigid saliva over her daughter's eyelids. "Though, this sample is a bit old. So…it might not be as potent as we would like. I'm not sure of the expiration date on Steven's saliva, but I guess this is as good a time as any to stress test it…"

After a few more moments of swabbing across Connie's eyelids, Priyanka forced them open and swabbed just a bit directly onto the eyes themselves. Connie shuddered. "God, this is weird…"

Priyanka nodded. "Welcome to my world, honey."

Lapis was uncomfortable, trying her best to squeeze herself into a tiny ball in the chair. Finally, the sound of a plastic lid slapping against the wall rang out and Priyanka tossed the used swab into the hazard bin. She turned in her chair and jotted down a few notes before turning back to Connie. "Okay, so now we're in observation. You and Lapis can go sit in my office for the next hour, listen to some calming music, and we'll see how things work out. Hopefully, your vision returns. If not, we'll call Steven and get a fresh saliva sample."

Connie groaned. "W-Well, let's hope that this one works…"

Hearing the tone of Connie's voice, Lapis was taken aback. Just what was that she heard there?

In Dr. Maheswaran's private office…

Connie and Lapis sat in Dr. Maheswaran's office, a quiet melody of smooth jazz playing in the background. All was quiet as the two sat there, Connie laying on a small loveseat with her arm over her eyes and Lapis in a chair. Finally, after a long enough pause, Lapis found the courage to speak up. "So, is everything good with you and Steven?"

Connie flinched in her spot. "Wh-Why do you ask?"

Lapis responded. "Because, when your Mom mentioned reaching out to him you reacted in a weird way. I remember you saying, when we first ran into each other, that the Gems and Greg were visiting Steven. And that you decided this was as good a time as any to visit your parents. You sounded happy then. But, now…"

Connie frowned. She didn't so much as murmur a response. Lapis nodded. "Touchy subject?"

This time, Connie did respond. "Yeah. Touchy subject."

Lapis sighed. "Okay…"

Another long silence. Lapis spoke up again. "Well, I hope this isn't a touchy subject, but I'm curious. That ring you're wearing…"

Connie smiled. "It's my wedding ring~ You were there when I got it."

Lapis nodded. "I was, but I didn't get the memo that it gave you Diamond powers. That's a heck of a thing to just casually drop like that…"

Connie sighed, rolling onto her side. She cracked her eyes open, now able to make out the blurry shape of her hand. "The Diamonds helped Steven make it. It was constructed using the essence of his Gem. So long as I wear it, it allows me to access Pink Diamond's powers if I find myself in a pinch or in need of some extra strength…"

She gripped her fist. "When Steven first showed it to me, he only made it half-way through the explanation before he started crying. He said he loved me and he would always love me and he was so happy we were getting married. And, to be fair, he's never gone back on that once. Every day has been an adventure, we've been together most of the time, we've gone everywhere, to different planets and different star systems…"

Connie closed her eyes. "We watched a star explode together and he said if wasn't even half as beautiful as I was…"

Lapis snorted. "What a cornball…"

Connie nodded. "My cornball…"

Lapis frowned. "So, what's going on then? Did you two have a fight, or…?"

Connie rolled over, putting her back to Lapis. She pressed her hand to her tummy and sighed. "Like I said, it's a touchy subject…"

Lapis nodded and the silence returned once more. After a while, Connie turned over and opened her eyes again. She could make out a fuzzy blue blob behind a curtain of milky fog. This time, Connie spoke. "So…Jasper. Is that a touchy subject?"

Lapis nodded. "Always. But…"

She cracked her neck. "...I'm annoyed to have her around. I'll never not be annoyed to have her around because, to be honest, I hate her guts. But…she was helpful during the recent crisis. So, I'm willing to put all of my personal feelings aside long enough for Bismuth to recover. Once Bismuth recovers, we'll ask her to help build Jasper a proper house on the outskirts of Little Homeworld that won't fall apart like the last one did and…"

As Lapis continued to speak, Connie heard her voice becoming more and more frantic. It was clear that she was upset about having to show any good will to her old tormentor. Connie sat up in her seat, her vision clearing more and more. Finally, Lapis finished her thought. "...I just…have to be strong…be the adult in all of this…for just a bit longer…"

Connie's vision was still blurry, but it had healed enough that she could make out the sight of Lapis, looking quite small in the visitor's chair, wistfully staring down at her wrists.

Back in Little Homeworld…

Peridot sat in her little nook, in her even littler hammock, and furiously tapped away at the screen of her tablet. The recent catastrophes had thrown her off of her schedule more than she ever thought they would have and now she was stressing. It had been two weeks since she last posted a chapter of her Camp Pining Hearts fanfiction and she was horrified at the thought that her loyal readers might move on! Or forget about it! Or start thinking she had quietly canceled it again! Peridot groaned and started to type even faster. "Nyeeeeh…"

Luckily for Peridot, all seemed to be quiet for the moment. Lapis and Connie had gone to the doctor, and their boorish house guest was nowhere to be found. For the first time in a while, Peridot finally had the peace and quiet needed to-

The door suddenly slammed open and the sound of rustling plastic bags filled the New Barn. Peridot stifled a second "Nyeh" and glared out of her little niche as Jasper flopped onto the couch, setting down an 18-pack of that foul-smelling beverage she enjoyed, dumping five family-sized bags of Chaaaaps! on the cushions next to her, and turning on the television to one of those inane combat shows she enjoyed watching.

Peridot glared with disdain at the sight of two meaty humans taking turns tossing each other around a canvas ring. And then, she shouted at the top of her lungs. "Would you turn that ceaselessly loud trite off?! Some of us are trying to create something art here!"

Jasper looked annoyed, shoveling two handfuls of potato chips into her mouth and following that by downing an entire beer. She belched as loudly as she could and crushed the can against her forehead. "You're a real mood killer, you know that?"

Peridot glowered. "Better a mood killer than a slovenly, noisy houseguest, you CLOD!"

Jasper shouted back. "What am I doing wrong?! I'm just trying to watch TV! I haven't said a word to you in three days!"

Peridot snapped back. "You're annoying! You're in my personal space! Stop it!"

Jasper was taken aback. "Stop what?! Existing?!"

Peridot snarled. "YES! STOP EXISTING IN MY PERSONAL SPACE! BE NEAT! BE QUIET! BE INVISIBLE!"

Jasper growled and rolled her eyes, turning off the television and tossing the remote across the room. "AH HORSESHIT!"

The hulking orange Quartz flopped onto the couch, crossing her arms in a huff. Peridot narrowed her eyes and then scuttled back into her private space to continue her writing. Jasper reached over to grab a handful of chips, but then she pictured Peridot coming out to yell again and stopped short. She was annoyed, but she knew her position. Lapis and Peridot hated her, but they were willing to put her up while she was technically homeless. Jasper had to try and be a good houseguest.

So, not being allowed to snack or watch television, Jasper fell back on the last thing she had left to hold her attention. She moved the pillow she had been laying on and pulled out that weird black object that she had found in the magma vein. No one else had given a moment of consideration to this thing when Jasper had erupted out with it, the filter, and that Bismuth she had found. Ever since, she had been fiddling with it and trying to figure out just what the heck it was. Jasper thought she recognized it, but that was little more than a vague recollection.

After nearly thirty minutes of prying at the thing, Jasper threw her head back and groaned in frustration. "Ugh…I wish that stupid Bismuth would just reform already…"

Peridot shouted again. "Would you quit groaning?! I…"

As the little green Gem stormed to the edge of the upper barn loft, she looked down at the object in Jasper's hand and cocked her head. "...what the heck is that?"

Jasper shot her the stink eye, grabbing the object and shoving it under the pillow. "It's mine. Back off, twerp."

Peridot sneered. "And how do I know that?! How do I know that you haven't been rummaging through mine and Lapis' stuff?! I know that doesn't belong to me, but I wouldn't put it past you to steal from Lapis!"

Jasper was instantly angry. "Are you calling me a thief?!"

Peridot retorted. "No, thieves are indiscriminate! I'm calling you a stalker!"

Jasper growled. "What the hell are you talking about?!"

Peridot leapt down, marching right up to Jasper without a hint of fear. "I've seen the way you stare at Lapis. I don't like it, either. Not from you, you Clod! Lapis has told me all about what you did to her!"

Jasper flinched. "Th-That's in the past. I-"

Peridot held out her hand. "Give it to me. You can have it back once I confirm you didn't steal it as some sort of demented keepsake."

Jasper snarled. "No! You can't have my shit you little brat!"

Peridot thrust her hand forward. "Give! Now!"

Jasper narrowed her eyes. "Do I look like a dog to you?"

Peridot narrowed her eyes right back. "Yeah. A desperate, little mutt actually."

The two Gems sneered at one another, neither giving any ground to the other. Peridot growled. "Give. Last chance."

Jasper responded without thinking. "Bite me, runt."

A brief pause. And then Peridot lunged at the couch, plunging her hands beneath the pillow and grabbing the object. Jasper's temper immediately snapped in two and she grabbed Peridot by the hair, flinging her back and simultaneously snatching the object. "Leave my stuff alone, you little bitch!"

Jasper squeezed the object tight and, to her surprise, it suddenly shifted. The Quartz turned her attention to the object and watched as it finished its three-quarters turn. She flinched. "What the-"

Peridot roared and launched into Jasper's face, grasping on with insect-like tenacity and unleashing a series of kicks to Jasper's eyes and nose and mouth. Jasper snarled. "Stop it! Get off of me!"

She dropped the object and it went tumbling across the floor, twisting and turning again and again and again as it did. The Quartz snatched Peridot off of her face and, without thinking, heaved her to the ground on top of the black object. Peridot ragdolled and crashed into a massive shelf covered in meep-morp, bringing it crashing down on top of her.

Jasper picked up the black object, watching with curiosity as five miniature pillars jutted out of it and each gave an eighth-turn, the square shape twisting to look like miniature diamonds. The Quartz grew concerned at the familiar shape, but then her attention snapped to the clumsily shifting rubble of the former shelf. She gasped, running over to the wreckage. "Peridot!"

Jasper knelt down and shifted the largest part of the pile. "Are you-"

Two cast-iron skillets came shooting out, battering Jasper across the face as it attached to the fists of a skilled boxer. Peridot was manically angry, not able to vocalize anything other than a furious "Nyeh!" as she continued to wail on Jasper with her ferrokinesis. Jasper dropped the black object, bringing her arms up to defend her face. She didn't notice that, as the device went tumbling, the section with the black pillars twisted four more times.

Peridot snarled. "STUPID! ABUSIVE! UGLY! SMELLY! LOUD! IRRITATING! DAMAGING! FOUL! LAPIS-HURTING! CLOD!"

Each word was punctuated by the ringing sound of a metal pan smashing into Jasper's head. She was trying in vain to defend herself, but each hit came accompanied by more force than the last. Peridot was stronger than Jasper would have ever given her credit for. See was still stronger, of course, but she knew just how easily her strength could damage a smaller Gem. And, in spite of her annoyance, Jasper had no desire to hurt Peridot or Lapis any more than she had in the past.

The assault briefly stopped and Jasper slightly shifted her arms. "Peridot, listen-"

Both pans came flying in and smashed Jasper right in the nose, causing a hairline crack along the surface of her Gem. The Quartz stumbled back and Peridot shouted. "I don't care if you don't have a place to live in anymore! Get the hell out of mine and Lapis' house and get the hell out of our lives you big, orange nuisance!"

Jasper's vision went red. Without thinking, she reached forward and grabbed Peridot by the throat. Jasper summoned her helmet onto her head and pulled back for a massive headbutt. Peridot cringed. "LAPIS!"

Suddenly, all at once, dozens of water chains burst into the room, locking themselves around Jasper's wrists, ankles, biceps, thighs, torso, neck, and all of her fingers and pulled her into a cruel, strict hogtie. Peridot fell to the ground, rubbing her sore neck. Connie, wearing a newly minted pair of glasses, ran up to check on Peridot. "Peri! Are you okay?!"

Jasper struggled in her bonds, finding herself unable to even budge. She looked up at the captor, a furious Lapis Lazuli, and started to speak. "La-"

A band of water tightly wrapped around Jasper's mouth, cutting off even a hint of sound. "Quiet."

Jasper gave one last brief struggle, but then she looked into Lapis' cold, pitiless eyes and gave up. She closed her eyes and waited until it was her turn to speak. Lapis turned to Peridot. "What happened?! Did she attack you?!"

Peridot stood, having calmed down, and grabbed the black object, cocking her head at how different it looked. "She was messing with this thing. I didn't know whether it belonged to you or not and she refused to stop messing with it. So…"

The little green Gem looked ashamed. "...I lost my temper. I…started it."

Lapis took the device, holding it up and glaring at it in confusion. "Whatever this is, it's not mine."

Peridot flinched, pressing her fingers together. "O-Oh…"

Connie frowned, giving Peridot a consoling pat on the back. Lapis looked over at Jasper, unclenching her fist and allowing some slack in the chains. Jasper was still restrained, but was now able to move her arms and legs. With a swipe of her hand, Lapis removed the gag and spoke bluntly. "What is this thing?"

Jasper wistfully rubbed her hand over her mouth, remaining silent for just a moment. She looked up at Lapis, a nervous blush on her face, and shook her head. "I dunno. It came shooting out of the magma vein alongside me, Bismuth, and the filter. It looks familiar, but I don't have a clue what it is…"

Lapis scowled. "Not a weapon?"

Jasper glanced up at her. "Why would I bring a weapon in here?"

Lapis took a deep breath and sighed. WIth a flick of her wrist, she removed most of the chains from Jasper and sent the water back to the fountain outside. Jasper groaned in relief, tenderly gripped her wrist. But then, a chain shot out from the liquid ring around her neck and Lapis gave it a harsh yank. Jasper shot forward and landed on her hands and knees. Lapis spoke in a deadly serious tone. "If I ever see you with your hand around Peridot's neck again, I'll freeze you in a block of ice and put you in the deepest ocean trench I can find. Got me?!"

Jasper shuddered, unable to lift her head. "Y-Yes ma'am…"

Feeling petty, Lapis dropped the black object on the floor. "Good."

She dispersed the final water chain and, as she sent the water back to the fountain, the black object hit the ground. The midsection gave one final twist and then, to the shock of all four present, it cracked open and exploded into a massive rainbow of light. The light beam surged forward and out the door, evaporating Lapis' water as it shot over Little Homeworld, over Beach City, over the ocean, and, finally, over the horizon.

It all happened so quickly that Lapis, Peridot, Jasper, and Connie could do nothing to react. The black object immediately lost all of its luster, going totally dim. Peridot reached down and picked it up, flinching as it turned to dust in her hands and showered to the floor.

After a while, Jasper was the first to speak up, voicing a thought that everyone in the room nodded in agreement to. "That feels like something that's gonna come back to haunt us…"

Meanwhile, on the Gem Homeworld…

In a small cubicle in a large office building in the White Diamond district, an alarm went off on a single console guarded by a single Gem. The Gem pressed her hand to the console and pulled up a report, growling with disdain. "One of the Prism Void Prisons has been unlocked. On…"

Coldwater Agate snarled in disgust as she regarded the source of the report. "The Earth."