Meredith came over just long enough to claim Evelyn for herself, and to order me to order the Watch to pull back down Twentieth Street. Then she was off again, bellowing more commands that saw a mixed group of Guards and dwarves of the Stone Watch rush in to take our place in line.

The Qunari seemed to be occupied with their own reorganization, so we got away cleanly.

Heh. Cleanly.

Less than four hours ago, I'd estimated I'd had a hundred and seventy men and women under my nominal command. That included both the Watch itself, along with the various Templars and Guards we'd picked up along the way.

When Nethon came over to talk to me, he quietly confirmed that we had just under forty people still upright and holding onto their weapons.

My utter despair at the numbers must have shown on my face, because the old man tried to buck up my morale. "That's just those still fit to fight, with some rest. Plenty more walking wounded that I sent back to the Alienage, plus wounded who can't walk but should still live. Might be as many as a hundred of those, all told."

We both knew that wasn't true, but I thanked him quietly, then told him to go get some rest.

After that... I forced myself to walk through everyone. To see just what my 'leadership' had resulted in. To look everyone still present in the eye, to see their exhaustion for myself. To see the clear shock in their eyes, the mourning for friends and companions who we'd had to leave on the cold ground.

Near the back I found my temporary squire; Lanamaya was in the middle of trying to covertly wrap a bandage around a nasty cut on her head, hiding behind two of the other surviving Templars. She must have run into the main group on her way to the Alienage, and joined up with them instead of going there like I'd told her to.

"No." I told her tiredly, "Go back to the Alienage and get that seen to properly."

God save me, she actually looked like she was going to cry when I said that, her head shaking once. That motion was apparently too much, and she had to stretch her arms out to keep her balance.

"I... I'm fine." She tried, "I need to stay. I-"

"Are suffering from blood loss, and maybe a concussion." I interrupted, turning to the man she'd been hiding behind. It turned out to be Ser Emeric, whose helm was in his hands to let me see his worn features.

I didn't see Ser Hound, and prayed he'd just been left at the Alienage to help protect it.

"Get her there, along with anyone else trying to hide wounds." I ordered. "And make sure they don't try to sneak back either."

"Lady." He smiled faintly, nodding once. "Come, Squire. You have your orders."

"I can't." She whispered, blue eyes almost desperate. "I haven't... I have to make up for what I did."

Bloody Thedas.

I stepped forward, bringing my hands up to cup her face. I got up on my toes, kissing her forehead before telling her, "Lanamaya. You already did. There will be no more chasing death tonight, you hear me? We're done for the night. You go back, you have Anders close your wounds, and then you protect the Alienage with Ser Emeric."

She did start crying then. Silent tears falling as she let the old Templar guide her away. He found two more walking wounded to take with, their companions giving them up when they tried to conceal their own wounds. One of them was Shina, who refused to go anywhere until I personally went over and told her to get her ass moving.

Then I finished my walk back where I'd begun, near where Merrill, Nethon, and Thrask had found some crates to sit on.

I collapsed next to my girlfriend, taking the small canteen that Nethon offered me. "Water?"

At his nod, I guzzled some of the warm liquid. It soothed my aching throat, but didn't do much to make me feel anything less than totally exhausted.

He must have been counting how many people were being sent off, because he reported. "That makes thirty-four of us left, lady."

"Yeah." I said. "Give me a minute to rest my legs, then I'm going to go find Meredith. Get permission to pull you back to the Alieange. There's not enough of us to make a difference, exhausted as we are. And we've got to protect our wounded."

Nethon seemed to slump in relief at my words, "Thank you, lady."

I waved away his words. I didn't deserve them. This was... fuck. This was worse than the maleficar attack on the Alienage. At least that had been sudden, out of nowhere. Something I hadn't expected. Sure, I should have, and I carried that blame, but I'd at least had... I don't know. A reason for not having prepared the Watch for that level of battle.

I'd known this shit was coming... and I hadn't done enough to prepare them.

My friends would tell me that it wasn't my job anymore. That it was Elowen's, and Nethon's, and Thrask's. That I'd had enough going on in my own life without needing to worry about scheduling extra training, trying to negotiate with people's employers to get them the time for it. That it wasn't my responsibility.

Most of the Watch was dead, wounded, or traumatized because I hadn't done enough.

God.

I closed my eyes, leaning into Merrill's side. Felt her wrap an arm around my mismatched armor, her cheek coming to rest on the top of my head.

I don't know how long we stayed like that. It felt like seconds, but was probably closer to ten or fifteen minutes before I heard a man quietly clearing his throat. I cracked an eye open to see Fenris of all people slowly resting on a knee in front of us, looking me over.

"You look terrible." He said, blunt as ever.

"Feel it." I replied tiredly. "Varric?"

"Still in Hightown, wounded." At my sharpening attention, he quickly waved off the worry. "Nothing major, a shallow hit from a crossbow. He was drinking potions and complaining that the Mothers tending to him wouldn't let him get up when I left."

That sounded like Varric. "How's the rest of the battle? Where's Bren?"

He sighed, resting his hands on his knee. "Confused. I'm not sure either we or the Qunari truly know what is going on right now. Meredith brought the vanguard here, and left Brennan to continue supervising transferring men down from Hightown."

I let out a quiet grunt. "What's the plan?"

"The Guard will replace the Templars as they arrive, allowing Meredith to consolidate here." He replied. "Or at the southernmost point of our lines, which I believe is here. Then she will personally lead the push to drive the Qunari west and north."

I was about to say that they'd better hurry, because the Qunari would probably make another attempt to break for their Compound, when the Knight-Commander's exhausted squire came staggering down the street. She waved to us as she approached, slowing to a stop near our little group.

"Lady." She rasped through her helm, "The Knight-Commander needs to speak with you."

Not all that surprised, I'd nodded, getting up. Fenris apparently felt like coming with because he rose as well, Merrill following suit a moment later.

"You can stay." I said quietly to my lethallan. "You don't-"

She leaned in, shutting me up by way of pushing her lips against mine. It was an enjoyable way to lose an argument, even amid all of the awful crap going on around us. A part of me wanted to tell Meredith to fuck off, just go back to the Alienage with everyone. Wall ourselves in, find some heavy food, and then just collapse in the nearest bed with Merrill's arms wrapped around me.

Part of me wanted that... but the rest of me knew that I had responsibilities.

Fenris making an amused noise in his throat would have made me blush in any other circumstance. Since I was too tired for it, I just gave him a rude gesture before we all turned to follow little Trevelyan.

He gave her his own canteen on the way, letting her tug her helmet up enough to drink some water, her hand passing it back just as we neared the corpse filled plaza once again. There we found that the Stone Watch had formed up into armored blocks, and were already moving west, while the mixed group of Templars and Guards were pushing Qunari corpses to try and create grim barricades of their own.

Orsino was helping with that, the unpleasant taste of his magic making my nose wrinkle as he worked.

For her part, Meredith was at the Chantry doors, surrounded by a small group of lightly armored Templars. More junior squires playing messenger, I thought. She'd pulled her helm off, letting me see just how deep her scowl was as she listened to one of them give a report.

"She know about the battle mages and that asshole leading them?" I asked Evelyn.

"She already sent a runner to Hightown." The girl replied quietly, "With orders to execute Knight-Captain Adams for cowardice and desertion on the spot, and to bring the entire force into Lowtown at once."

I was just snorting at that when Meredith noticed the four of us approaching. Waving off her men, she stalked over at once, taking me in. Merrill got a harder glance, but apparently now wasn't the time to discuss the obviously Dalish mage walking beside me. In comparison Fenris must have done something to impress her, because he got a short nod of acknowledgment.

Up close let me see something I'd really rather I hadn't; Meredith's pupils were dilated to hell. Whatever she'd taken was letting her move more freely than I would have expected, but I didn't doubt it was going to be rough on her system tomorrow.

Hell. It might be doing a number on her brain even as we stood around, but even a drugged up Meredith probably had more tactical skill than anyone else in the city, so I wasn't about to say anything. I'd ask her what she'd taken tomorrow, if we both lived through the night.

My salute made my tired arm ache, and I was grateful that she returned it quickly, letting me drop the limb.

"Status of the Watch?" The Knight-Commander asked without preamble.

"Thirty-four of us still upright." I reported, "But I think we're done, messere. I think they'll fight to protect the Alienage, but... we took too many losses. Morale is shot, and we're exhausted and starving, even if our souls were still willing."

A single sharp inhalation was the only reaction she seemed to allow herself, then she nodded once. "Very well. Inform the Watch Captain to remain in place to guard our rear until Guard Captain Evighan arrives with additional forces, then he is to withdraw to protect the Alienage."

I gave her a tiny bow, "Thank you, messere."

Meredith's smile was small, but genuine. "Tell them I am proud of them. They fought well, and stopped the heathens long enough for us to arrive. I will ensure all are taken care of when the battle is one."

"Thank you, messere." I repeated myself, then asked, "What do you need from me?"

She regarded me for a long moment, clearly evaluating me. Then she shook her head, pulling her helmet back on.

"Remain here to protect the Chantry doors." Meredith ordered. "You will continue that duty even after we renew our advance."

Standing around and protecting a Chantry while she ran off and did the rest of the fighting? That sounded fine to me, even if I'd have preferred to have gone back with the others to the Alienage.

I saluted her again, a gesture she returned before striding off, her coterie of bodyguards and messengers in tow. "Ma vhenan? Could you go tell Nethon the plan? I promise I won't go anywhere."

"Of course." She pecked my cheek, then told Fenris. "Keep her safe, Fenris. She's been even more reckless than usual tonight."

His chuckle came with my scowl, his deep voice replying, "I will do my best."

Then she was trotting off back the way we'd come, leaving Fenris and I to wander over to the Chantry doors. I pulled one just open enough to look inside, and found a veritable sea of Humanity inside. People sitting on the pews, on the ground, huddled under ratted sheets. I saw the Revered Mother and her lay sisters trying to pass around cups of water, and the old woman saw me.

She began picking her way over at once, leaving me to sigh and patiently wait for her to arrive.

"Elf." Her tone made her opinion of my species clear. "What is going on out there?"

I forced myself to be sort-of polite in my response. "We held, and Meredith is out there with her personal guard. I think she's waiting on Cullen to get here with more men, then they'll be continuing the attack. I'll be staying here to make sure no one gets into the Chantry."

"The Knight-Commander cannot leave someone more qualified to do so?" She demanded.

I twitched. "No."

And then I stepped back and yanked the door close in her face. It wasn't as cathartic as a proper slam, but it made me feel a little bit better all the same.

"Fucking gratitude would be nice." I muttered, turning to lean back against wood. "How many of our people died so you could be a racist bitch?"

Fenris shook his head, leaning in beside me. "Those thoughts will lead you nowhere good, Maeve."

"None of my thoughts are leading me anywhere good right now." I countered.

I thought he grunted quietly, his armor creaking when he shrugged. "That is the nature of battle. I cannot say my thoughts were ever positive when I was in Seheron either. Still, the Qunari must be tiring and running low on men as well. It will soon be over, one way or another."

It was my turn to grunt inaudibly, doing my best to relax.

He had a point. Our best guess had the Qunari at about six hundred men to start the day with, though that hadn't included Tallis and her people. Maybe another thirty or forty there... ugh. Now that I had a moment to think, I had to wonder just how the hell they'd gotten into the city so quickly.

Eh. That would be for later. For now I had to keep my eyes open and up, watching for said assassin bitch in case she tried to sneak in behind us. Again.

I watched as Meredith got her troops more organized. The Guard and Stone-Watch were formed up against the street that we'd tried to hold, while the Templars had move left, protecting the western entrance. Meredith's personal guard stayed back near her in the middle of the plaza, clearly ready to go wherever they were needed.

My mouth was just opening to ask Fenris what he thought the Qunari might be up to when they decided to answer for themselves.

A flare of light to the left made my head snap around, and I was dimly aware of every Templar doing the same thing after another second or two. Everyone of us reacting to the surging magic in the air, even if I was the only who could literally see the spells coming together.

Blue, red, green, orange, yellow, purple; too many colors assaulted my eyes, making me recoil physically, clapping my hands over my ears on agonized reflex when a cacophony of noise rolled over me. I felt Fenris grab me, pulling me back, sheltering me as he realized what the Templars and I were reacting to.

"Smite-"

Meredith didn't finish giving the order before a literal firestorm turned night into day. Three of the buildings to the north and west didn't go up in flames so much as they simply exploded into shards of stone and splinters. The Guards and Dwarves holding the nearest entrance began screaming, all of them retreating in a complete panic as the out of control spells boiled into the open. As blows of force threw aside the bodies that had been crudely piled up.

The Templars managed few reflexive Smites that saved most of them. Only a few went down howling, rolling to try and bat out the flames.

The mixed group of the Stone-Watch and City Guard weren't so lucky.

One moment there'd about forty, maybe fifty of them. The next moment there was about half of that still able to begin a panicked retreat; the rest were dead on the ground, or else screeching as they were cooked inside of their armor by the rolling flames.

Meredith's shouting for order, to stand fast, went ignored. Those poor men and women hadn't been professionals anymore than my Watch had been. They'd been medieval police and militia, and being roasted by mages wasn't what any of them had signed up for.

They routed, streaming backwards, forcing the Templars to beat a quick retreat of their own. Theirs was a disciplined one, rallying near Meredith's position just as the Saarabas themselves began to come into view

I caught my breath, recovering from their coordinated assault in time to see them charging in. Their chains had been loosened but not removed, sending up sparks where they dragged on the ground. Each was encumbered by something on their back, something I couldn't make out until the first one threw itself onto the blades of the Templars who met its rush...

...letting me see a wooden barrel tied to it shoulders.

"Get back!" I screamed so loudly that I felt my throat start to give, "Gaatlok! Get back!"

Just a few yards away, Meredith seemed to be the only one to have heard me. That or she recognized it as well, her own voice rising to a bellow. "Back! All men back!"

I don't think her men heard her, or me. Not when the Qunari mages kept trying to throw out spells, causing men and women to cry out prayers to the Maker and Andraste as they smothered the magic before it could take form. As the Saarabas were cut down one after the other, their deadly cargo seemingly unnoticed by most.

Only a few of Templars seemed to realize it. I heard more of them screaming for the others to get back, that it was a trap.

The Qunari didn't give them the chance.

Men became visible in the smoke, slings whirling above horned heads, hurling grenades into the chaos of the mages' suicide charge.

Explosions rippled up and down the line. The heavy blasts of Saarabas being blown apart, taking Templars down with them. Fragments of their bodies joined with the shrapnel from the grenades to scythe down more, the entire formation buckling nearly as one. Even the leading members of Meredith's guard were hit, recoiling in pain and shock at the assault of weapons few had ever truly seen.

The whole thing had taken twenty seconds. Thirty at most.

Our formation was a wreck when the Antaam's horns blared, and their soldiers made their own charge against stunned and reeling knights.

I realized Merrill had returned when the taste of her magic washed out that of the Saarabas, a Rock-Fist hammering down one of the leading Qunari, but her rush to my side became a stagger from the cost of the spell. She was tapped out again.

We were all tapped out.

The first Qunari arrived wielding ax and sword, cutting down what few Templars had stayed upright. They died fast, barely able to defend themselves.

And then it was just Meredith and her personal team, a dozen or so hardcore warriors already retreating toward the Chantry in step with one another, their leader in the center. Fenris was off like a bolt a second later, moving to lengthen the line on the left, and I found myself rushing in just as the Antaam reached them.

The man on Meredith's left died first, one of those damned axes biting deep into his neck. I lunged past his corpse, opening the guts of the man who'd done it with my blade, protecting Meredith's left. Her own long-sword was flashing, a dozen runes lit up along its length, making the air shimmer as she parried, then killed her own first opponent.

I recovered myself, barely deflected a spear, Merrill's staff jabbing over my shoulder as she protected me as best she could.

"Back!' Meredith roared, "Step!"

We all rolled backwards at her command. Swords and shields flashing, deflecting, defending. Cutting when we could, stabbing those few chances we had.

Another Qunari fell. Then another Templar. One Kossith. Then two more Templars.

They were just too many of them. All pressing in, abusing their size, their height, their reach. Staying too far back for my little arms, my slender blade. I could do nothing but defend, desperately trying to stay alive, trying to protect Meredith's side.

She cut down another, bellowing for us to step back again. Then again. Then again.

I knew when we'd reached the Chantry because my back hit Merrill's chest. That she must have stopped because she'd had to.

"Open the door!" Meredith called, "We hold the entrance in the Maker's name!"

Fenris blurred past, more ghost than person, leaving two Qunari to strike nothing when they tried to cut him down. I parried another attack, then a second, then heard him shout into my ear. "It's open!"

I felt Merrill pull back. Saw the last Templar on my left go after her, but Meredith didn't move, and so neither did I. A thrust at my heart was frantically deflected, my riposte cutting open an arm. One step back caused the man trying to swing at me to strike the side of the building instead, weapon scraping on stone, leaving him open when I lunged in at his groin.

He went down, two of his fellows pulling him back, leaving another to take his place, swinging at Meredith's hip. I got my sword out, deflecting the attack, protecting her.

She lunged that way, ramming her blade into the spearman's chest before he could try again, twisting to take a glancing blow from another, making me realize it was just the two of us out here now. Two of us standing in a doorway as the Qunari kept swinging...

...and then they all pulled back, letting men with those enormous shields slam them down, creating a wall of metal not more than five yards away.

Behind them, smoke began to twirl as the slingers with their black powder grenades began to wind up once more.

I felt my heartbeat start to slow as I stared, then felt a hand grab my shoulder.

Meredith half-threw me into the Chantry a second later, turning her back on the Qunari just as their grenades came in.

It left her silhouetted just as the bombs began exploding all around her. I hit the ground just as she staggered, enveloped by the dark smoke. Felt the air ripple as more fragments raced past, hitting the men and woman behind and above me.

But all I could see was Meredith taking one more step, sword slamming into the ground to stop her fall.

All I could see was the blood running down the gaps in her armor.

I thought I heard her roar one last time, turning just as the Antaam moved into finish us off.

Saw her batter aside one last blow, burying her weapon in her attacker's chest.

Then she jerked... and fell off of the spear that had gone through her neck.

Meredith Stannard's body struck the floor of the Chantry, and I could only stare in shock. Barely noticing her killer striding in to meet the berserker charge of a Templar screaming in grief filled anger.

The man dying when he met a wall of spears, a Qunlat war chant beginning to sound in rhythm.

Fenris saved our lives. He'd somehow gotten to one side of the door, avoided the grenades. Hadn't gone into shock like I was. He blurred in, his massive sword breaking the spears of the leaders, driving them back through the narrow gap. The last Templars, some absent part of my soul prayed that one of them was Evelyn, rushed to help him, forming the narrowest wall of steel.

Meredith was...

"...Merrill?" I rasped, finally pushing myself up, trying to find her. We needed her magic. Blood or lyrium, it didn't matter at this point. We were dead otherwise. "Merrill!"

She gave me a woozy wave, slumped against a pew. A hand pressed to her side where blood was visible. Bits of her frayed magic trying to patch the wound.

I stared at her in horror. Heard the clash of steel. Turned to see Fenris stumbled over Meredith's still body. Saw him barely avoid being beheaded. Saw the Templar on the right kicked back, screams erupting all around when they were driven back into a group of the cowering civilians.

Right. They were here too. And screaming. They'd been screaming. I just hadn't noticed.

Meredith was dead.

Merrill was wounded.

We were dead.

"...no." I heard myself hiss, getting my legs under me, "No. Fuck. That. Shit."

Longing's name was on my lips, in my thoughts, when everything seemed to lurch sideways for a moment, then slow down.

I felt a single beat of my heart.

Felt my mana begin to surge through my veins.

Felt my exhaustion washing away.

Felt myself beginning to walk forward, though I couldn't remember standing.

I reached the doorway when the last Templar collapsed, when it was Fenris alone trying to hold them back.

A light turn let me side-step the first spear thrust at me, my advance not slowing as I got in close, ramming my blade up and under the enormous man's sternum. A whisper of magic slamming him back into the rank behind him, buying my hunting partner enough time to gather himself. To reset his stance properly.

"Stay close." I ordered, somehow making my voice perfectly audible against the shouting and screaming all around.

Anything he could have said was swallowed up when the Qunari pressed back in. When I brought my sword up, and poured magic into it.

Poured light into it. Turned my little nightlight spell into something greater.

I don't know how I didn't blind myself, only that I somehow knew that I wouldn't. Deep bellows of shock cut through the higher-pitched screams of women and children, the Qunari universally recoiling when I came at them with a sword the color of the fucking sun in my hands.

Spears fell, shields rose, trying to protect their eyes.

My golden sword lashed at their knees, their waists, anywhere that wasn't protected by armor. I cut tendons, left their guts to tumble out of their bellies. Left a half-dozen screaming, collapsing before they knew what had hit them.

Fenris was behind me, his own sword flashing, cutting the throats of the wounded. His feet carrying him after me as I advance back out of the Chantry, stepping over the men I'd lamed to find the Qunari pulling back as they tried to figure out just what the hell they'd run into. Why there was a sunrise at midnight stabbing into their eyes.

A shouted order had the slingers start to wind up, trying to throw while shielding their eyes.

Right. Those were the fuckers who'd killed Meredith, who'd wounded Merrill.

I snarled, flicking my sword in an arch, hissing in time with each grenade I saw being loosened, "Schwert! Schwert! Schwert!"

I didn't waste the time trying to direct the bombs. I just hit them with enough force to detonate them right above the Antaam... and suddenly it was the Qunari's turn to reel as explosions went off all through their ranks.

Then the replica was complete when the deep blasts of a horn sounded a charge, and a cry of 'For Andraste!' filled the air.

A turn let me see Cullen's lion helm in the lead, more Templars and Guards hot on his heels as they bull-rushed the Qunari from the flank.

Some part of me knew that I should drop the spell. That I needed to.

But in that moment... I just poured even more mana into my blade, the golden light illuminating the entire squire.

Then I charged in right along with them, Fenris at my side.