Tuesday 1 October 2002, Nice, France
"I started to feel more confident with this teacher Layla, telling her a bit more about my life, she was trying toget closer to me, I was starting to feel confident with her too, she was a teacher who was nice to me andeven showed me a bit of her hidden magic, In addition to helping me a lot, I was already memorising thelines I had to say very well and I was also managing to act them out, I was really looking forward to what wasto come, at that time it was my chance to boost my career, where in my book I even congratulate the teacher,but I didn't tell her that I told her a lot."
Phew, I've managed to memorise the whole text, it's here in my head, the script is well saved, good time to start leaving and getting things ready, today is a normal Tuesday like any other, I've already worked, now that I'm back part-time I'll be earning less, which sucks, but at least it's something.
I change and wash my face, I head for the school exit, but before I leave the place the teacher Layla approaches me, I think she wants to say something about my performance today, did I do badly?
"You're to be congratulated Chariot, but I don't want to talk about it today, I want to know more about the girl who's behind this Joanna D'arc, let's go for a walk today, I'll buy you a McDonald's" I even get excited and nod my head in agreement.
"Really? I'd be very grateful, it would do a lot of good, today I wouldn't have to make food" I say happily.
"Sure, come with me, we'll go for a drive" That's marvellous, I'm already getting my things, starting to leave with the teacher.
We go downstairs, I get into her car, and we start to drive around the city, I love it when we drive around like this, I imagine I'm going to be able to gorge myself at McDonald's today, it always brings back great memories, I even remember when I used to pretend to be a little man with my hand jumping over the electricity wires.
"I realised that going to McDonald's always gets you in the mood, you really like going there, it's because of a memory of you" said the teacher.
"Yes, it's because of the times when I was younger, my mums took me for the first time to eat there on the trip when they took me to their house, those were the best years of my life, I had friends, I had loving mums, I had everything I wanted, I never went through any need and I didn't even have to force myself to work to fulfil my dreams" I say to her as I look out of the window.
"What about your father? What happened to your family, girl? You said mums, so that means your mum split up with your dad and is now with a woman, right? I think that's a beautiful thing, they're such warriors, going against everything and everyone for their love" at least one person who doesn't think it's wrong, like my father.
"They are my adoptive mothers, when I was very young, my father let me be taken by them because he thought they were just friends and that one of them would only adopt me, so I was able to move to Edinburgh, I lived there for almost five years, they were the best years of my life, my mothers were loving and attentive people, my father was always absent, he accepted it because he saw me as a burden, so much so that he himself told me recently?" I answer the teacher.
"That's awful, girl, but what made your father change his mind? If you were so happy with them, what made you come here to France? You seemed really happy there" She has no idea.
"Homophobia, but it doesn't even come close to the main factor in all of this, which is money, unfortunately I wasn't welcome in that house either because of the sister of one of my mums, she lived there and she was a very cruel person, she kept blackmailing me and putting fear in me just so I wouldn't stay in that place, One day she succeeded, she was full of money and paid my father to take me away from those marvellous mothers, the threats were very strong, I didn't want my mothers to be arrested, so I had to go back to France, it's been more than two years now..." I explained more about my story to her.
"That's awful, she's just been treating you like a bargaining chip, that woman could go to prison, just like your father" said the teacher.
"They could, but then this woman would get really dangerous, she's a powerful witch, with contacts, as for my father, well I'd be alone, without a home, apart from the fact that I'd put an end to my plan, I wouldn't be able to fulfil my dream of studying in Luna Nova by staying in an orphanage, just as I wouldn't be able to return to my mothers because they're in a very delicate situation" I'll make it clearer.
"Wow, I don't know what to say, I thought your situation was better, but why would going to an orphanage take away from your dream of going to Luna Nova? Orphanages are very safe places, you wouldn't have to work for anything" Exactly because of that.
"I need forty thousand pounds at least, or else I can't study at Luna Nova and I won't be able to if I stay in an orphanage that prevents me from working, so I only work because of that, but obviously my father is against this idea, he makes me pay for everything, I'm the one who provides for the house, while he's swimming in the money he earns from his work and from bloody Daryl" I say clenching my fists.
"This is very unfair, you're only twelve, you shouldn't be doing this, it's family abuse, but I understand your fight for the forty thousand, we're getting there, I want to know a bit more about you Chariot, you seem like a girl with your own peculiarities" said the teacher.
She's a great person, we drive past, she lets me take whatever I want and she always tells me that I can take a lot of things, I'm so happy, and then we drive to the beach, where we sit looking at the seafront, setting up chairs, with the rest of the snacks that we still have, watching the Mediterranean.
There's at least one good thing about this town and that's the landscape, this place is truly marvellous, apart from anything else and the fact that it's the best place I've lived in France
"So, why do you dream of studying at Luna Nova? I studied there when I was younger" Woah, really? That's so cool.
"Really? That's really cool, teacher, I want to study at Luna Nova because that's where my mum went to school and also so I can have a better chance of realising my dream, I want to enchant the world with my magic, I want to be a stage entertainer" I say getting up and starting to dance with a stick.
"They studied there too, that's interesting, I went there around 1989, I graduated in 1992, my dream was to be a witch, also to work in the theatre with magic, but the world of witches slammed the door in my face, it's quite annoying, so remember that you're going to have to go head-to-head, by the way, what are your mothers' names?" Asks the teacher.
"Laura McLaren and Bernadette Cavendish" When I say that, she's stunned, like I've released a ghost.
"Were you adopted by them? Girl, do you have any idea how respected those two witches are, despite all the scolding, Laura McLaren was the most skilful witch at the academy in years, she won the broomstick relay three years in a row, she's a moonlight witch, so is Bernadette Cavendish, they went head to head and showed everyone that they're a couple, even though the teachers picked on them, I was one of the ones who protested to them about it, your adoptive mothers are incredible women, you were brought up by the best witches this world has ever seen" I had no idea how important they were, it's something that great.
"Above all, they were marvellous mothers, but because they were the way they were, I always knew that the world saw them in a different light"
"My respect for you was already enormous, but now you've really impressed me Chariot, I can see in your motivation that you can get there in your dream, I believe in you, now it makes sense for you to have entered the theatre school and the ballet school, you're only increasing the range of skills and learning more to increase your future performances, great, but how are you going to get into Luna Nova, there's an entrance fee, plus the tuition, it's not going to be easy to find a lot of money for that" I know... That's why I'm trying.
"I've already got £25,000 saved from my attempts, but as something always happens to stop me, I have to get at least £40 by 2005, but it's going to be difficult with my father being his way" She's shocked.
"The cookies really got their revenge, didn't they?" How does she know that? I'm shocked.
"How did the news get here?" I say impressed.
"I read the Luna Nova Times, they talked a lot about your Cookies, I knew it was you, but try not to show too much of that side girl, witches are very conservative, they like everything about magic to be serious, believe me, I tried to do theatre mixed with magic and they wanted to reduce my efforts as much as possible, so don't ever give up girl, stand up and show these witches who you are, you've already shown that you have potential, if they tried to reduce your first effort, it's because they're afraid of the way you are, they know how you captivate people, now you've really got me marvelling at you, a golden girl like you out in the world, going through all this, I'll do my best to change your life" said the teacher with her hand on my shoulder as I looked at the horizon.
I hope she can really improve my life, I've finally found a wonderful person, well, I think my life can go to another level, then we get in the car, after talking by the beach, she takes me home, I wave to the teacher, smiling a lot and going home, I already know I'm going to have to listen to a lot of rubbish coming from my father, but that's okay.
If the teacher was my mum instead of my asshole dad it would be much better, would it be worth doing this kind of thing? I don't think so, I'd be wasting a lot of time and money staying at the orphanage, I'd better just carry on until I'm forty thousand, then I'll make sure my dad loses custody of me.
[...]
Sunday 15 December 2002, Paris, France
"I was revealing more things to Professor Layla, she was really getting closer to me, it was all so perfect, Icouldn't believe that after everything I was getting my chance, I'd been thinking about it since the day sheadopted me, I thought the chances were growing, so much so that I was really excited to impress her evenmore, I practised my role as Joanna D'arc every free moment I had, at home, at school, at work, in dramaclass, I polished that role wonderfully well, the day came and I was ready, that performance was going tochange my life, I wanted to impress everyone, especially the teacher".
The time has come, I'm all made up, it's time to start as the peasant Joanna D'arc, to get to the great warrior, I've staged this play in the best way, with everyone, we've really got along, I've made a point of telling everyone that we're going to give our lives, that friendship is important.
I'm Chariot Du Nord and anything is possible, let's change the world and show what this witch has to show," I take a deep breath and soon the narration begins
"Go on, Chariot, remember everything we taught you" said the teacher.
I go in all calm and I'm already going through the curtains, starting to embody Joanna D'arc, I see the audience and it's simply huge, I've never seen so many people, it was much more than in Annecy when I sold the Cookies, woah, so that's what you mean by fame? They've really made a point of calling the audience, and I'm already starting my performance, showing tranquillity above all else.
[...]
I'm already in the last parts, about to be burnt, wow, I've really given my life to this role, I'm getting tired from all the acting I've had to do, but I haven't made any mistakes and I haven't felt any white noise, it's just going, that's really good, I've managed to concentrate.
"What are your last words?" Said the priest with the torch in his hand.
"I would rather die than do something that I know is a sin, or against God's will!" The torch is thrown into the fire, making a fiery effect, and it was even playing tearfully, bringing the whole performance to a close as the curtains close.
Then everyone who performed in our show appears, they join in, the curtains reopen, we thank the whole stage and the applause starts to come, there's a lot of it, people are loving my performance, I've given my blood for this, I can't believe I could do so well, I'm even holding myself back from crying, but I think I'm starting to feel like letting it all out.
I've done it, I've impressed and charmed people, I've really done marvellously well, life is so wonderful, this is perfect, I love it all, it's perfect, I want this for my life, to become the great stage entertainer, that's my dream. The curtains close again and I run to hug Professor Layla.
"Oh Chariot, you did very well today, you really surprised me, congratulations on being able to show everything you have to offer, that's an impressive performance, you were marvellous from end to end, you really were the best Joanna D'arc, she herself would be delighted if she saw you face to face" she said and I get emotional.
"I couldn't have done it without your help, teacher, you've been the best person I've met in all the time I've been here in Nice" I say all emotional.
"I'm honoured by that, now let's get ready, it's going to be a long journey from here, we're going to catch the train home, you've all been excellent" I hope this creates the relevance that I hope it ends up creating.
And we're leaving that theatre, going to the hotel, I'm amazed, the people cheering us on, I've never heard so much clapping directed at us, my performance was really perfect, all that effort was worth it, I've never felt
so happy, I have a lot to enchant more people for sure.
As we get on the van to the hotel, I look at the scenery and also at the teacher, who smiles at me, she's such a lovely person, she's always treated me very well, I really want her as a mum, even if they find it strange that I'm a white girl with a black adoptive mum, she's wonderful.
[...]
Thursday 20th February 2003, Nice, France
"As I said, Nice was the place I stayed the most in France, I simply had a lot of ups and downs, but myhopes of one day gaining an adoptive mother, even if only for a short time until I entered Luna Nova, alreadyhad me enchanted, what I didn't expect was that the day would come when I would receive the greatest gift, Iwouldn't have imagined that Professor Layla would give me that proposal, it was like a gift, greater than whatshe gave me as a gift."
A busy day at work, now it's back to theatre school, I'm even relieved that since October I no longer pay the monthly fee for theatre school, it's as if the teacher is paying for me, now I'm going to class and I'm sure I'll have a better day, at school it was already that forgettable thing, nobody remembered that it's my 13th birthday, at home my father doesn't even know when my birthday is.
First of all, I'm picked up by my teacher's car, she comes round asking me to get in the car and I get in and she's so happy, she remembers that it's my birthday.
"Did you really think I'd forget Chariot? Today you turn 13, I mean... 17, Antonia... Hahaha, we're already in the car, never mind, today's going to be special for the working girl, you haven't celebrated a birthday in a long time, have you?" I nod my head in agreement.
"Since I was nine years old, since I turned ten when I was living in France, thank you teacher, you have no idea how happy this makes me" I tell her and she strokes my head.
"That's why I'm taking you to celebrate, there won't be any lessons today, we're going to celebrate your 13th birthday" said the teacher.
We arrive at the theatre school very quickly, I'm walking up the stairs, I'm very happy, today is the perfect day, I get inside the school and there's simply a party all ready, people are welcoming me, all the students are gathered, I'm even moved to tears, the teacher comes up behind me and touches me on the shoulder, I was there free to celebrate, I didn't imagine there would be all this.
"Happy birthday, Chariot!" They all said.
"Wow! You did all this for me?" I say all moved to tears.
"I've even asked your boss to let you go early today, so we can enjoy it for longer, I've invited everyone from the theatre school to this day, after all this girl deserves it, you're the sunshine of this theatre school, you make everyone glow" I hug the teacher, all moved to tears.
"Thank you for everything, Professor Layla, you've been like a mum to me" I say to her as she caresses me.
"Oh... I'm flattered by that girl, come on enjoy your day, we have a lot to celebrate, today you turn thirteen!" Said the teacher.
I'm walking round the party, picking up the pies and food, already a bit hungry, I didn't realise I was going to have everything, this, they're hugging me, wishing me a happy birthday, after a hard day's work I can finally have my rest, this is wonderful, I never thought I'd be so well and happy here, it's not so bad in Nice.
[...]
The party was very lively, we sang Happy Birthday, it was the first time I'd heard it in French, I was surprised, also at how I'd finally been able to have a party for my birthday, I was really happy about it all, and then Professor Layla brought me a present, it was a huge box, wow, and there was another box that was also a considerable size.
"It's all yours, enjoy your present, I bought it so you'll love it" she said.
On opening the present and tearing open the paper, simply the largest box is a Mahoutendo Spheregame, I can't believe I've won a Spheregame! I've won a video game! It's marvellous, it's the best present of all, I
open the other present and there are lots of games, I cry.
I hug Layla tightly, thrilled, while she caresses me, this is the best present I could ever get, it's the kind of thing only my mum would give me, this is a wonderful present, perfect.
"There's more to come, but we'll talk about this present later, it's something I'm going to need your help with" she said.
"That's marvellous, Professor Layla! It's an expensive present! It's the best thing I could have ever got! I'm going to love spending every moment with this thing" I say tearfully.
"Of course you will, now let's go, I have to talk more about the next present" I nod my head in delight.
We're leaving the theatre school, with me holding that huge box, I can't wait to get home and play on it. I only had my old MagicStation 1, which I play from time to time, and I'm very attached to it because it's the video game I first got from my mum, and now I've got it from my teacher Layla.
[...]
We arrive at the beach, as usual, we get out of the cars, leave the chairs on the sand, it's a very cold day, but it's not so extreme, at least here in Nice it doesn't snow as much as it does elsewhere in France, it only snows here once in a while.
The teacher holds my hand and I get a little warmer, then she puts her hand on my shoulder and takes a deep breath.
"Chariot, we've spent many months together, I've got to know you better and I've been thinking here, I'm still quite young, still single, I want to enjoy life with someone I've grown to love and attach to... I've been thinking about it and I want to adopt you, I know I won't be the same as Laura and Bernadette, but I can give you a better place to stay" I'm shocked, in such a short time she's already forming this attachment to me.
"Really? But don't you think that's going to be impossible?" I ask her.
"We can't give up, right? I want that magical little girl you've shown yourself to be to be able to still live in you, that's why I want your help, you'll tell on your father, he'll end up being arrested for child abuse or something like that, he'll lose custody and you'll go to an orphanage, I'll offer to adopt you and soon you'll be in a new home, we'll enjoy a lot here in Nice, until you're old enough to go to Luna Nova, I'll make sure to give you the missing 15,000 Euros" said the teacher smiling at me and I hugged her again.
"Professor, that would be marvellous, I'll certainly try, I'll find a way to catch my father being an abusive jerk and get some abusive words out of him, then we'll enjoy the time together, I'd be very grateful for all of this" I say more emotionally.
"You deserve a home where you can live with dignity and love" said the teacher.
"I accept the plan, I'm going to start doing it today, that's for sure, mum-to-be" I say as I wipe away the tears that have started to flow.
"I know you will" she said, hugging me.
[...]
"How naive we were, my father had been suspicious ever since the presentation in Paris, he started talkingto Daryl to keep an eye open for Professor Layla, to the point that he learnt about this conversation andimmediately told Daryl, but I, a fool, was just finding it hard to get any more abusive words out of him, But onthe contrary, the bastard turned up out of the blue with the rent paid, the bills paid, everything for him, I didn'tneed to spend my money and I was already starting to get weirded out, I was trying to talk to the teacherabout it, she was also a bit suspicious until the worst could happen..,"
Monday 10 March 2003, Nice, France
I think my father knows everything, it can only be that, he's suddenly putting food on the table, paying for the house, he's even taken a leave of absence for a few days, it's very strange, on the one hand it's marvellous, I just managed to earn a couple of thousand euros on it, recovering a lot of the loss I made on the move, now he's taken another leave of absence for a few days.
It's time to go to the theatre class, he knows that the water is hitting his ass, it's fear, that's for sure, but it
won't take long, he'll come to his senses soon, I hope, I arrive at the theatre school and see that it's very quiet, the teacher is there, but Layla isn't there
"What about Professor Layla?" I ask him.
"Layla left, you didn't hear, your registration was cancelled too Chariot, I'm sorry to tell you that, I know how attached you were to her?" I know how attached you were to her. What do you mean she left? What's going on? I have a lot of questions.
"Did she leave? But why? There's no reason for her to leave, at least she said so" I'll ask the teacher.
"From what she told me, she had an offer she couldn't refuse in Montreal, so she had to leave on the spot, a shame, isn't it?" That's a lie, what do you mean she left out of the blue? I'm starting to cry.
I leave the theatre school and start calling the phone, I have the teacher's contact number, but nothing, just nothing, no one is answering, this is very strange, why is something like this happening? Damn it, this can't be real, for the nine witches.
I'm running around with my mobile phone to my ear, but it keeps falling into voicemail, I get home and there's a lorry right in front of our building and it's taking our stuff, which makes me a bit angry, I go up the stairs, back inside and I see everything is empty, my dad's come home.
"What's this, Dad? We're not moving!" I say angrily.
"I knew all about it, girl, your little plan with the teacher, now we're going to leave, but don't worry, I won't charge you for anything, I think I've made a good living out of it, as long as you don't keep taking jobs, we'll move" he says and I walk up to the damn guy and he just shrugs his shoulders.
"What did you do to Layla? What have you done to her!" I'm starting to fight.
"I didn't do anything, I just followed the plan to move, don't complain to me, because I don't know anything, I just passed on the information to the person you know who it is, now come on girl, the taxi is waiting for us, we'll go to our new house, it's a bit far, but that's what it's for" I'm all disbelieved, with all this, my world just fell apart.
"And you think I'm going?" I ask him.
"You're going, there's nowhere to live, here in Nice everything is empty, I've already taken your safe and it's in the lorry, it's either that or stay there begging, which you choose, I guarantee that from now on I'll be less worse, you don't have to work to give me money and help out around the house, from now on you'll be a normal teenager, but if you think about getting extra money I'll immediately cut you off and we'll go to another town, so be an obedient and decent girl and obey your father" I cry angrily.
"You're a monster! I hate you!" I say, hitting him on the chest with my hands.
I walk down the stairs in a rage, getting into the taxi, without much choice, I can't believe I've seen all this go down the drain, my big chance, bloody Daryl won't stop being a bastard to me, it's not enough that she upsets my mothers, she's still coming after me, a bunch of bastards, they're making my life a living hell, but when I'm older they'll just see, I'll show them the whole truth and I'll be old enough to go wherever I want. The phone soon starts ringing, I answer it, it's Professor Layla, she's calling me, her contact details are saved, how wonderful, I'm so happy.
"[Hello Chariot, it seems your dear little teacher had to go for a walk, but don't worry nothing bad will happen to her, this was just a warning, don't try anything funny, obey your father or the consequences will be the worst, you don't want to hurt these people do you? I know you don't, now I'm going to say goodbye, you don't like talking to me at all]" She hangs up the call and I'm left with an expression of shock, at the same time pure hatred.
"Don't get angry like that, we're going to a beautiful place, you're getting the chance to get to know France better now, we're going to enjoy the beauty of Bordeaux" Said my arsehole dad, I have an overwhelming urge to just fly in the bastard's face, and just get rid of it all.
I got very angry, I'd rather not say anything, this is very unfair, I can't believe I'm fighting all the time against everything and everyone just for my right to have a comfort, I have to live in shit all the time, my dad is just an arsehole, I don't know how my mum ended up with him, it could be anyone, but him... Ugh, just wait until he sees something.
"It was to be expected that Daryl would do everything to get me away from Layla, after that I never saw heragain in my life, but she didn't die, she just ended up moving far away, every time I tried to chase after her asan adult, they always said she'd moved, so it didn't work, she was neither in France nor in Canada, whereshe has both citizenships, anyway? I moved to another place in France, my fourth city Bordeaux, which ismore tolerant of witches, but that's it, I couldn't work, my father put a huge restriction on it and here beginsthe year full of changes, there are places that I didn't even stay for a fortnight until my father caught meworking and moved on the spot, the good thing is that it didn't come out of my pocket anymore, he was theone who had to spend it, since now the old man was more attentive to me and knew that I could end upmaking him worse off, on the other hand I couldn't accumulate money that much anymore."
See you, teacher witches...