Hi guys, this is my first attempt at a Sherlock fic, any comments are greatly appreciated :)
Chapter Four
"Well? Your silence isn't very reassuring," Molly and Meena were lazily winding their way across the Millennium Bridge of the River Thames, the two of them having taken their free Saturday to meander the streets of the bustling city. Molly had spent the last half hour explaining her chance encounter with Professor Gordon and the opportunity he had presented her with.
Meena was an incredible listener. Attentive and courteous, knowing exactly when to nod her head, precisely when to gasp in surprise or offer a reassuring pat on the arm. However, she was yet to comment, and this was unnerving Molly to the point of distraction. She huffed loudly and stopped suddenly, Molly turning to face her,
"This feels like you're running away."
"What? No!" Molly's voice was a little more forceful than intended, but the stress of the situation was rising. She had never once considered this viewpoint, to her, she was turning her back on a distressing series of events in favour of a relief brough on by a familiar link to a place outside of her comfort zone.
'Damn…That pretty much does sound like running away…' She thought suspiciously, internally kicking herself for her transparent stupidity,
"Okay…So maybe a little," She turned and began walking again, looking straight out ahead of her at the bank on the other side of the bridge, acutely aware of her friend beginning to move again also, "Look, I just can't stand this ever – present shadow hanging over my head. It's everything. The flat, Sherlock and his entire damn family, even just closing my eyes at night. It's all sat there. All the time, inside my head."
Meena caught up to her and fell in line with her step,
"I'm only going for the three months, give myself a break. They probably wont even know that I'm gone." Meena took hold of her arm,
"Molly…How can you think so little of yourself? Of course, people would notice if you just suddenly weren't around!" She felt a pang of guilt and chewed on the inside of her cheek in frustration. Meena just didn't understand how she felt at all. The thought of escaping, even just for twelve weeks, a new adventure beckoning her over the horizon was almost irresistible. She wanted the getaway.
"I'm going to get rid of the flat anyway, and I can't live with you forever. I can go away for a few weeks, get things straight and when I come back, I can have a new place for me and Toby," She smiled at Meena, a warm and genuine one, "It'll do me some good." Her friend considered her for a moment, and then gave a heavy nod, seemingly resigning herself to Molly's decision, "I just need you to do one more thing for me."
~x~x~x~
It was peaceful in the park as Molly waited patiently on a bench for Mrs Martha Hudson, John and Rosie to appear. She had text him earlier that day and requested that they accompany her to Radnor Gardens to which he had graciously obliged with the intent on commandeering Mrs Hudson on his way. She had decided she would tell them that she was leaving, she was, after all, Rosamund's godmother and wanted to assure John that she was not skipping out on her duties. And Mrs Hudson had become family to her over the years of knowing the Baker Street Boys. To say that Molly had minimal blood relatives, the elderly lady had always gone out of her way to make sure there was a cosy heart and cup of tea to warm her if she so needed it.
Rosie was two years old now and bursting with energy, babbling away to anyone who would listen, playing with her toys and giggling to herself. And this is how she greeted Molly, waddling her way across the gravel path, her father in tow, hurriedly shuffling behind her and urging her to slow down for fear of hurting herself and Mrs Hudson who was chirping on about ordering new furniture for her recently renovated property. Rosie threw herself into Molly's arms and she swept her up into the air, spinning her around as she cried out in pleasure. John was breathing heavily when he reached them, a large bag swinging from his back and hips. He looked considerably better than when they had last met and had obviously taken some time to recuperate himself and straighten the shambles of his life out.
"Hey, how are you?" John asked gruffly, sitting down next to her and sighing with relief, Mrs Hudson hurriedly moved to her other side, embracing Molly and making herself comfortable.
"Yes, yes. I'm fine, you know, tottering along," She gave him a wide smile and waited for him to remove the bag and seat himself a little better. They exchanged kisses to the cheek and then settled back in to watch Rosie run around in circles, cackling to herself and singing a vaguely familiar Nursey Rhyme – Though which one it was Molly couldn't quite say.
"And how are the two of you after..?" She started, faltering as she didn't quite know wat to say to finish her question.
"I'm seeing a new therapist." He gave a sharp nod of his head, not taking his eyes off his daughter,
"Preferably not one that's going to try to drown you in a well this time," Mrs Hudson interjected, not looking at either one of them as they turned to face her. Her short hair was windswept from the crisp afternoon air and she had a soft, ephemeral smile etched into her aging features. Molly had always held an admiration and respect for her no – nonsense attitude and determination.
The snort that John released was short, sharp and forced,
"I do suppose that's always a good start,"
"And you Mrs Hudson? How are the renovations going?" Molly enquired, lacing her fingers together, a sense of peace and normality washing over her. This was how her life was supposed to be, calm and tranquil, spending time with the people that she loved and enjoying lazy days in the park. Her stomach tightened considerably as her mind finished the thought,
'Listening to Sherlock spout off about his latest crimes solving spree,' She recoiled into herself in internal embarrassment,
"Oh yes dear. They're almost finished now, wonderful what they can get done in such a short space of time these days," Mrs Hudson replied aloofly, bringing Molly back into the present with them both, "I'll be needing some new furniture, but at least there'll be a few less bullet holes in my walls."
"That may not last very long," Molly commented flippantly, Rosie suddenly shrieking loudly as a bird swooped over her head in readily close to her. She dispelled into raucous laughter once more and threw herself into the dirt, pulling up tufts of grass as she went and ramming it into the pockets of her large, fluffy red coat.
"Well, you know Sherlock, always making a mess-"
"So, come on then," It seemed as though John had finally lost patience with the polite chit chat that they had fallen in to in order to avoid actually talking about why they had all gathered there, "What's all this about then?" He turned to look directly at Molly, and she squirmed a little under his gaze.
She hadn't practiced this part of the conversation in her head and a limp formed in her throat, her lips dry and hands itching. Her insides writhed as she sighed heavily,
"I...I...You see the thing is...I'm going away for a while,"
"What?" John's face fell in shock and he picked up Rosie as she toddled over to them, sitting her upon his knee securely,
"Oh, a holiday! I'm taking a trip to South America later in the year, should be lovely a warm-" Mrs Hudson rattled off, Molly suppressing a small smile. In a way, her flippant attitude soothed her, in another it only increased her anxiety, knowing she would have to further explain,
"That's not it," she drew in a deep breath, "There's a placement going, it's only for a few weeks. It would be a fantastic opportunity for me, and I think I need the break. It's not forever, l, just temporary."
"And where is this then?" John demanded, his voice laced with worry and apprehension,
"John...It's at a university, in Australia, with a Professor I used to know from my time at Cambridge."
"Australia? You have got to be joking Molly, that's insane, that's-"
"My decision surely?"
He silenced immediately, concern and fury etched into features as he stared back at her. Mrs Hudson had been surprisingly quiet during this time and Molly wanted desperately for the ground to swallow her whole,
"That it may be," John continued, breathing heavily and shutting his eyes tight for a few seconds, "What about Sherlock?"
Molly have an all too obvious twitch and gulped,
"We agreed to put everything behind us, and we've been having space to process everything, try to move on from the whole embarrassing fiasco. This is just an extension of that. He doesn't need to know where I'm going."
"You can't keep this from him, Molly,"
"It's twelve weeks John, I'll be back before you know it. I-"
"I think you should do what you need to do." Mrs Hudson finally decided to enter the conversation and both of her companions turned to face her. Her features were soft and knowing and she have them a gracious upwards twist of her lips, "Sherlock will survive and you will heal and everything will be back to normal before you know it,"
John was staring at her in disbelief. Molly on the other hand had a sudden rush of emotion towards the older woman as warmth overtook her and a swelling in her chest threatened to push tears from her eyes. John sighed heavily and drew a hand down over his face, staring intently at his daughter apparently in deep thought.
There was a long silence as the three of them watched others who traversed the gardens, happily meandering along in their lives, oblivious to the torrent of emotions festering upon the little bench.
"I will go and see him before I leave. But there isn't any point in telling him and making a big goodbye fuss. By the time he realises I've gone I'll be back, and he knows that I need the space to get my head straight." The sinking feeling had returned and was constricting Molly's insides painfully,
John considered her and Mrs Hudson stood,
"I could do with a coffee," She swept Rosie into her arms, plucking her directly from John's lap, "And you need a snack," Without even waiting for a response she began to walk away from them, chuntering away to herself as she went.
"I'd like to get ahold of Mycroft as well, do you know how? I don't have a number for him or anything," He frowned at her, clearly unconvinced of any reason as to why she would need to contact the eldest Holmes sibling, though choosing not to peruse it.
"I may be able to get hold of his assistant Anthea, tell her you want to speak to him. But I can't promise anything," His voice was full of disappointment and the stabbing pain she felt in her chest was growing with each passing moment. She took his hand suddenly and looked directly into his face,
"Thank you, John. This won't change anything you know. I love you all so much, you're like family to me, this is just something I have to do. For me,"
He relented and sighed heavily, giving his head a small shake and then finally returning the pressure in her fingers,
"Doesn't mean I have to like it though,"
~x~x~x~
Strolling down the corridor of St. Bartholomew's Hospital towards her office Molly sighed heavily, a warm beverage clasped tightly in her hand and a pounding in her head to accompany it. She had just spoken to Greg and Mike simultaneously, told them if her plans to take a sabbatical and had been pleasantly surprised at how well they had taken the news.
Mike had smiled at her warmly and out an arm around her shoulders, assuring her she would be missed and he already couldn't wait for her return to impart all her new found knowledge on others studying at the hospital. Greg equally gave her a reassuring nod, and insisted she buy him a pint as soon as she returned in penance for depriving him of her skills in the morgue.
The relief had been overwhelming after having received such poor reception from Meena and John.
And now she just had one more to go. The man who was currently sat in her office pouring over reports and files and hurting himself in his work. Her heart rate was rising at an alarming rate as she reached her door, the feeling of dread that had become so familiar to her recently seeping into her skin and deep down into her bones. Biting her lip furiously she gave herself an internal shake and stood up straight, turning the handle and forcing her feet over the threshold.
He didn't even look up, his head in his hands, fisting at his hair furiously. He must have been thinking hard as he continued to mutter to himself, coat thrown over the back of her chair as he paced behind her desk, shirt unbuttoned slightly and sleeves rolled up.
Molly could have slapped herself as her skin flushed brightly at the sight of him. Anxiety and lust blending into one, she tried to pull herself together, knowing it was either speak or run away.
"Sherlock?" He ignored her, continuing with his pacing. "I don't mean to disturb you, but I wanted to talk to you about something." She said confidently, her voice completely masking how she really felt,
"Can't you see I'm busy, John?" He huffed in her direction, not even looking at her. Her emotions flatlined immediately.
"It's Molly."
He stopped suddenly and rounded on her, seemingly confused by her sudden appearance. Before he could speak any further, she placed the cup on the desk and he stared at it momentarily before drawing his eyes back to her,
"Black coffee, two sugars."
Again he didn't respond. It was as though she had caught him off guard and he didn't really know how to process the new and unexpected presence in the room. She wasn't sure she had ever seen him like this, perhaps he just didn't know what to say for how their previous meeting had been left, didn't want to hurt her feelings any more than he already had.
"I just wanted to let you know, I've got a bit of work experience coming up, so I won't be around," She shuffled uncomfortably, fully aware his gazed had zoned in on her, "I...Well, just thought you should know, is all." He nodded slowly and she licked her lips, and cleared her throat, her mouth suddenly drier than a dessert.
Molly couldn't quite work out what was going on in his head and the tension in the room was reaching unbearable heights. This was not what she had expected. She had been sure he would have questioned her thoroughly, deducted and ridiculed her before leaving her in floods of tears and second guessing whether she should leave or not. But he didn't and Molly felt an even bigger resolve. She had to do this. For herself. And she would not let him dictate to her any longer, not that he seemed to be even considering it. Perhaps he had taken he words of moving past the phone call as gospel, was respecting her wishes and putting her needs before his own for once. He had changed so much since they first met, he had grown into a man rather than a petulant and demandingly selfish boy.
"Okay, well, that was it then," She shuffled from one foot to the other and for a moment felt that she needed to say something else, especially as a flash of emotion swept across his usually stoic features and he parted his lips momentarily. He seemed to think better of himself and remained silent.
Unable to bear to any long, Molly turned and left, closing the door behind her firmly.
Japan's Arc Angel x