Chapter 3: Dynasties and Falls
Recoomended listening: Sirius - Alan Parson's Project
Sanae took a deep breath to calm herself down, she was already a bit high off the gummies but was told to curb her addiction by various people including her landlord, the pizza boy, the milk man and her former employers, Kanako and Suwako.
Of course, being told to curb her marijuana addiction by a damn hat-wearing loli and some old hag wasn't a very nice experience, so she had fucked off to the real world to escape into the bliss of weed, sex and self-discovery.
By self-discovery, she was yelling at the TV again as she had fucked up her parlay again and again... she had a bad habit of risking it all in hopes of striking it rich, she was a hopeless green-haired gambling weed addict.
"Man fuck the Washington Wizards, ever since those fuckers drafted J.R. Ballard 1st overall, they've been fucking the NBA with a god-damn cactus!" Sanae ranted angrily, why wouldn't she be angry when the Washington Wizards had seemingly monopolized the NBA after that fateful draft night.
What was once a shitty, bottom-tier, no-good poverty franchise was now on its twentieth title in the past 25 years, not only destroying all intrigue in the NBA... but also surpassing the Lakers and Celtics as the premier NBA franchise.
The TNT half-time crew appears on the screen, the old bodies of Ernie Johnson, Shaquille O'Neal, Kenny Smith and Charles Barkley still dominate the TNT Halftime show, they spoke about the "Series of the Century" where the two greatest teams ever, the 2044 Washington Wizards and the 2017 Warriors were to face off.
Despite being billed as the series of the century, as the series to determine the GOAT NBA team... it was a one-sided beatdown with J.R. Ballard and Wladimir Pavlovic eating Draymond Green alive in the post and with unguardable mid-ranged shots.
Sprinkled into the mix was Seth Davidson, the 6'7 Forward out of Richmond who possessed the agility of Russell Westbrook with the shooting of Steph Curry, combined with the passing of Lebron James.
"Fuckin' hell, this game is atrocious... Series of the century my ASS, this game should've been between the 2044 Wizards and the 1996 Bulls, bet Jordan would've given the damn Wizards a better challenge."
Sanae ranted bombastically, she was very high off the strawberry Cannabis gummies that she couldn't even think of anything more than hot-takes off of twitter, so she ranted without a thought in the world.
"How do you think the Warriors can come back from this 30 point deficit in the second half of the game?" Ernie Johnson spoke, he was trying not to fall asleep.
"Well... they have to feed the big man, let him eat..." Shaq responded, he was still tall and imposing despite being an old man now, Charles Barkley responded to his foolish response with renewed fervor.
"Are you fuckin' stewpid Shaq? The Wizards have the 6'11 Ballard and that tall fucker, Wlad guarding the paint and Draymond's yee-yee ass offense ain't scoring on that 7'4 motherfucker" Charles responded, Kenny watched the two old men argue about NBA philosophies as he suddenly shouted at the top of his lungs.
"BUT HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT AFFECT LEBRON'S LEGACY?! I DON'T CARE IF DRAYMOND CAN'T SCORE ON PAVLOVIC, NONE OF THESE TEAMS MATTER BECAUSE THEY CAN'T AFFECT LEBRON'S LEGACY!"
Sanae recoiled in disgust at this pathetic excuse for sports commentary, she turned off the TV by thrusting her remote control into the monitor and she responded.
"This is why nobody watches the NBA anymore, why bother with this when you can watch the NFL? Then again, that old fucker won another super bowl at the age of 90+"
Sanae thought about the Superbowl this year, Tom Brady had unretired and joined the Patriots, winning a superbowl at the age of 90+ against an equally old Patrick Mahomes and the Kansas City Chiefs.
(What's that? That Superbowl is impossible because both teams are in the AFC... well too bad, this is fiction so fuck that nonsense)
"Eh... sports are overrated, the Dodgers always sign all these free agents then get their butts kicked by some random team... and the Superbowl is always the same fucking teams!"
Sanae miraculously turned on the broken TV and she spoke to herself in solitutde.
"I wonder if those geriatrichs are still arguing about Lebron's legacy, I get he's scored 100,000 points by playing until his 80s... but still hasn't won another chip outside of the damn bubble ring" Sanae snickers, thinking about the 2020 "Mickey Mouse" ring and how it was played during the Covid season.
"Then again, the Dodgers title doesn't count either... at least the Buccaneers had preseason games and at least the motherfucking Washington Wizards played actual seasons with a salary cap during their 30+ year dynasty..."
As the program continues, Shaq has the audacity to speak out some of the corporate garbage he was supposed to be shilling for... Sanae, coked out of her mind... snickers.
"If you picked a FanDuel bet on Kenny Smith talking about LeBron's legacy, you win a $300 dollar payout."
Sanae snickers and snorted some rainbow crack from her pocket, relaxing as she took a snort.
"Easy pick-up, of course that motherfucker couldn't resist talking about LeBron's legacy, ESPN has been milked dry of content when the superior league, the NFL isn't on... they might as well broadcast some TLC shit for all I care!"
With that, Sanae turned off the TV and looked at herself in the mirror... she saw a hot chick who could've been so much more had she not've fallen into drug addiction... all because she listened to that bitch 10 years ago... that motherfucking rainbow MILF, Ragyo Kiryuin.