A\N: I've always toyed with the idea about doing a Willicia oneshot where Alicia lies to Will about not loving him anymore, then he acts like she doesn't exist because he's too broken hearted this time. This won't be like my usual tragic romance Willicia oneshots because it will have a slight twist. I hope you enjoy this one, Angels.
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It was raining the night she got lost 6 months ago.
She remembers it like it happened last night:
She's getting out of the car with Peter's help when they hear a familiar voice shouting her name.
"Alicia!"
She looks up and sees Will standing in the pouring down rain. She sighs as she looks at Peter who is looking irritated at her former boss. Not that she blames him, seeing Will tonight wasn't part of her plan either. "Go on upstairs, tell Zach and Grace to get the ice cream out, I'll be up in a few minutes, I'm sure he only wants to speak about work." She tells Peter who sighs before kissing her cheek and heads inside the apartment building but not without throwing Will a look and leaving the former lovers alone in the pouring down rain.
"What are you doing here, Will?" She asks him. Will looks at her like she's grown a second head, his eyes are wide and angry, the only emotion she sees in his eyes when she looks in them nowadays.
"Why?" Is Will's reply to her question. She's confused but before she can ask what he means, he's speaking again, every syllable coated in anger as it leaves his mouth. "Why are you back with him?" Will asks as the rain gets heavier. "You ended it between us because you needed to focus on Zach and Grace, which I understood, but why are you back with him after everything he did to you?" Will questions her, his voice is as angry as she's ever heard it, even when he discovered that she and Cary, and the other fourth years were leaving, he had been angry but he had also been betrayed. But all she hears now is anger.
"Will, now is not the time for this, I have to go. Peter and the kids are waiting." She says. She can't do this tonight, she can't do this anymore. "Just answer me this: do you love him?" She looks at him.
"What kind of question is that? Of course I love him." She lies to him, Will shakes his head, rain flying from his hair. "No you don't. You don't love him, at least not in way you used to five years ago before his sex scandal was revealed." Alicia can't believe what she's hearing: Will has to be drunk, he has to be because sober Will wouldn't show up unannounced outside her apartment building in the pouring down rain ready to ambush her as soon as she gets out of the car and ask her these questions.
"Will, stop, we're over, I'm with Peter." She says, Will shakes his head again.
"Oh come on, Alicia, I know you, you seem to forget that: I know you and I know you don't want to divorce him because you don't want Zach and Grace to be like you and Owen, but they're not going to be like you and Owen, Leesh. You don't love Peter and everyone can see it."
The name 'Leesh' sends a dagger into her heart. It was a name he called her at Georgetown, and it stuck when she came to work at Stern, Lockhart and Gardner, into their affair and until she, Cary and the others left. The name reminds her of happier times between the two of them.
"Will, stop it! I don't love you, I never have!" Alicia shouts over the rain, the dagger pushing further into her heart as she shouts these lies at him.
His face is no longer full of anger but now it's full of pain as she says the words. His face changes from pain into an emotionless mask.
"Fine. We're done, as of this minute, we're done, our friendship is gone. It'll be like you never existed. Goodnight, Mrs. Florrick." Will says coldly before he turns away and walks away, the rain preventing her from watching him walk out of her life. Forever.
Tears flow down her face, mixing with the rain so it's impossible to tell which are the tears and which are the rain drops running down her face.
The next six months were like Will said: after that night in the rain, he'd been treating he like she doesn't exist. Every time she and Cary came into Lockhart/ Gardner, Will walked right past her without saying anything to her, whenever she said his name, he pretended not to hear her, when they were in meeting, or in court, he didn't look at her once, and she's sure both Cary and Diane have caught onto whatever was going on between the two former friends/lovers.
It was taking a toll on her she began to feel lost without Will in her life and wasn't sure how much longer she could handle not having him in her life in some way.
The day it became too much for her was only hours ago, after he lost in court to her and Cary.
"Will can we talk?" She asks as he passes her outside the courtroom. Will walks right past her, his gaze locked on his phone.
"Will, please!" She begs, tears beginning to fall down her face in the middle of the courthouse.
Will leaves the courthouse without speaking to her, breaking her heart.
She leans against a wall to support herself. Someone puts a hand on her shoulder and she looks up through teary eyes and sees Diane.
"I ... I can't do this anymore, Diane." Alicia sobs before leaving the courthouse, tears still falling down her face. Lying to him, telling him she's never loved him was the biggest lie she's told. Lying to him is the biggest mistake she's ever made, and one she won't be able to correct.
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Diane Lockhart didn't know what occurred between her partner and his ex-lover six months ago but she could see it wasn't good, and it became apparent that it was taking a toll on Alicia and she couldn't take it anymore.
She may have felt angry by her and Cary's leaving but she still liked the woman and to witness her tears didn't sit right with her.
And her partner was to blame for Alicia's tears.
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The last six months were hell on earth for Will, they were nothing like the six months he was suspended from practising law, because at least he still had Alicia in his life in some capacity.
His heart was ripped out of him when she told him she never loved him, but he knew she was lying, he could see it in her eyes.
The door to his office was banged open by an angry Diane who looked like wanted to strangle him for something.
"Fix it!" She demanded of him. He had no idea what his partner was talking about: fix what? Before he could ask, his partner had started talking again.
"Fix whatever is going on with you and Alicia." He sighed, he should've known that it was about Alicia, it was always about Alicia.
"There's nothing to fix, Diane." He said to her. Diane rolled her eyes as she fixed him with a death glare that promised hell for him if he didn't do what she demanded.
"Bullshit," she snapped. "fix whatever is going with you and Alicia, and fix it today." Diane took a seat in the visitors chair in front of his desk.
"It can't be fixed, Diane." He told her quietly, he dropped his eyes to the paperwork in front of him. Diane picked up his baseball and started to throw it up in the air.
"What happened between you two 6 months ago, Will?" Her voice was soft as she asked him the question. He met the eyes of his partner and sighed.
"She said she didn't loved me, never did." Will muttered. Diane scoffed and rolled her eyes. "That's a damn lie and you know, that woman loves you." Will shook his head. "She told me 6 months ago." Diane stood up and stared at him. "Fix this, Will and fix it today because I won't witness her crying in the courthouse again, not because of you."
And with that, Diane left him alone.
Will lent back in his chair and groaned, running a hand up and down his face. He regretted saying that they were done, that their friendship was gone, and that she no longer existed to him because if he was being honest with himself, which he was, Alicia would always exist in his life weather he wanted her in his life or not.
He stood up, grabbed his jacket, phone, keys, wallet and left his office.
He had Alicia to find before he lost her forever.
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Will Gardner was in a panic: Alicia wasn't at home, her front door was locked, her car wasn't in the underground garage, and he gave back the spare key she had given him three years ago. He knew Peter and the kids were in Springfield for the weekend, and that she wouldn't be going with them, he had heard Alicia tell Cary as he passed her in court a week ago, so they wouldn't know where she was, and Cary just said she was taking an early weekend and asked not to be interrupted unless the firm was burning to the ground or someone needed her urgently. Will sat in his car in silence. He needed to find Alicia and fast. Where was she? He asked himself before a crazy idea entered his head: it was a long shot but it was the only shot he had. If it didn't fire, then he'd get Kalinda on it.
Will rode the elevator up, his mind played the events that had occurred in this very elevator two years earlier. He found it hard not to smile when the doors opened to the designated floor of the hotel. He was here to find Alicia, not to relive the past.
The door beeped and turned green and he opened the door quietly, stepping into the darkened suite. He knew Alicia was here before he set his eyes on her: he'd know that perfume anywhere. He shut the door just as quietly as he opened it. The room was dark, but he didn't need light to locate Alicia:
She was asleep in the bed, dressed in her clothes with her boot still clad on her feet. He gently unzipped her boots and took them off before he found a pair of pyjamas and dressed her in them before he slid her underneath the covers. How she didn't wake up at all was a testament to how tired she was which didn't surprise him.
He stripped down to his boxers and joined Alicia in the big bed and fell asleep with the aroma of her perfume floating around him.
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A hand was around her waist when she awoke, but it wasn't just any hand, she knew this hand, it was Will Gardner's hand. She sat up abruptly, her hand was still encased in Will's. She was underneath the covers, dressed in her pyjamas, with Will Gardner spooning her!
She looked over her shoulder at the sleeping Will. She always loved when she got to watch Will sleep: he looked so peaceful.
Will found her when he lost her.
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A\N: This has been sitting in my note book for a few weeks, though it's longer than the handwritten version. I hope you enjoy this one Angels.