Surviving Malfoy _ Part II : Anger and Depression
She Wants Revenge 'Tear You Apart' – It's Only Just A Crush, It'll Go Away.
Chapter 29:
Knife throwing.
Theo's other idea for me is knife throwing.
I'm reluctant at first, not really wanting to touch that blade again, but eventually I warm up to the idea. It is a comforting thought, having a back-up weapon. But Theo's plan goes deeper than that. As soon as we've both sobered up, he makes me throw the knife with my left hand. I'm confused at first, I'm right-handed, and it takes me a good two dozen attempts before the knife lands anywhere near the training dummy and a few dozen more until it sticks.
But it makes sense. I need my right hand for my wand, and my left is free for the knife. I can throw it and conjure it back immediately. We start using a training knife after I almost slice Theo's arm during my first attempt summoning the thing; same build, same weight. It still scares me. It takes me days before I stop jumping aside when the knife comes flying back and the other inhabitants of the room have taken to clearing the training area whenever Theo and I are at it. Protection charms have been put in place by the room, keeping the knife from flying into the sleeping or dining areas, getting stuck in mid-air instead, held back by an invisible wall. It makes for some funny situation, once eliciting a high-pitched screech from Seamus, who was standing a little too close to the barrier when the knife came flying his way.
It's fun, it's a distraction, it tires me out. Other people start to join after a while, and the room starts providing various types of throwing weapons – knives, axes, darts, stars, bolas and something called an onzil none of us have ever heard of, but that Parvati ends up taking a great liking to. I teach everyone who's interested the numbing charm Draco taught me.
We try keeping the younger ones away from training, at least, that was how Neville and Parvati had run the trainings before we arrived. But when Nigel, a third-year student, is first to ask Theo and I if he can have a go at throwing the knife at the end of our first day, things change. Parvati argues we should keep the kids away from any fighting. Theo argues, that learning a new fighting technique does not mean they ever have to put it into practice, but it will give them an edge if they're ever forced to. Neville, much to Theo's delight, agrees, adding that we don't know how long this war will be, these kids might be grown by the time it ends, and they should stand a chance if it does. Which prompts Seamus to ask:
"Why are you looking for Ravenclaw's diadem?" during lunch one day.
A few people in the vicinity visibly perk up, their eyes darting to me. "To defeat You-Know-Who," I say matter-of-factly.
"Why though?" Seamus continues. "Don't you think it's a bit of a waste of energy to look for a diadem that's been lost for centuries, just to get a bit wisdom."
"Harry doesn't need it for wisdom," I say, putting my fork down. "It needs to be destroyed. Don't ask me why," I cut him off. "I can't tell you. Harry's orders."
A few people exchange looks, and Theo interjects "so what, we just break the thing in two when we find it?"
"It's not that simple," I say. "I can't actually destroy it on my own, I don't have the right tools. I'm finding it for Harry, and he'll handle it from there."
"So, Harry's coming here once you find it?" Seamus asks.
I shake my head, "I don't know. Maybe. He has some other things to handle first."
"What things?"
"Seamus, I can't tell you," I say intently.
"No because, no one has heard a word from him, Ron, or Hermione in months. Nothing is changing, the Prophet-"
"If you believe the Prophet Finnigan, you're much stupider than I ever thought you were," Theo cuts him off and I place a hand on his arm to shut him up.
"Because if You-Know-Who had any idea of what Harry is preparing to do, we'd be done for," I say before Seamus can respond. "If we don't find the diadem before he does, we can't beat him. Please trust me."
Seamus glares at me but doesn't say another word.
"Are you sure it's at Hogwarts?" Neville asks.
"Not a hundred percent," I say. "But very likely yes."
"Can't we just accio it the way we do the knives?" Asks Nigel, sitting a head shorter between Neville and Seamus.
Theo shoots him a look and picks up his wand. "Accio diadem" he says, and we all sit frozen in silence, but as expected, nothing happens. "Worth a try."
"Has anyone found a picture of the diadem yet?" Neville asks the table.
Piles of books have started lining the walls of the room, some brought in by students from the library, the rest are books we have been able to think of explicitly and were then provided by the Room. Whenever Theo and I aren't training, we are reading them, with the help of almost everyone in the room whenever they have a spare minute. But we haven't found a single depiction of the diadem to date.
"Oh!" Luna pipes up, looking around the table wide-eyed until she meets Padma's gaze. "There's a statue of Rowena Ravenclaw in the Ravenclaw common room. I think she's wearing a diadem."
Padma's spoon clatters onto her plate. "Yes! Oh my god, there is, I'm so sorry. I've seen it almost every day for seven years straight, I completely forgot it was even there."
I push my plate aside and pull the marauder's map towards me, laying open as always in the middle of the table.
"You're not seriously considering going to the Ravenclaw common room," Theo says incredulously.
"Of course, I am."
"I don't know how accurate the bust is," Padma says. "Rowena Ravenclaw died a thousand years ago. There's no plaque on the bust-"
"It's a depiction of it," I interrupt her. "It's a start."
"I'll come with you," Luna says, leaning over the map.
"Me too," Theo says.
"And me."
"Hold on," I say, holding up my hands before any more people volunteer. "We can't all go. I can't have fifty people traipsing through Hogwarts trying to stay undetected. I'll take Luna, she'll get us into the common room, and Theo, he's the best dueller here."
Padma, who had volunteered last, sinks into her seat. "But then you three will be the only ones who know what it looks like."
"I'll try and make a drawing," I say.
"That'll take way too long," Neville counters and then he gets up, looking around the room. "Colin?" He calls.
Colin Creevey, one of three muggle-borns hiding with the DA in the Room of Requirements, pokes his head out of his hammock. "Yes?"
"Do you have your camera on you?" Neville asks.
"Sure," he jumps out of the hammock and walks over to us, an old-fashioned muggle camera in hand. "What do you need it for?"
"I need to take a picture of a bust in the Ravenclaw common room." I get up to walk towards him, stretching my hand out for the camera.
"I'll come with you," Colin says, holding the camera close to his chest.
"That's way too dangerous, Colin," I say. "We can't risk getting you caught, and we're already three people. Would it be ok if I borrow it? It won't take more than an hour, I promise."
Colin glances from me to Neville and back. "It's just… It was my father's and…"
My heart sinks and I turn back to Theo, who, meeting my gaze, gives me an almost imperceptible look of exasperation. "One more, that's it," he says. "But I want someone causing a distraction somewhere else in the castle."
Seamus smirks, "I'm sure we can handle that. We wanted to glitter-bomb Carrows office anyway, it's far enough away from Ravenclaw tower."
"Glitter-bomb?" Theo asks frowning.
"Sort of," Seamus shrugs. "Fred and George sent some interesting stuff. They've started selling Glittervape. It comes in a muggle spray-can. It's invisible and when you spray it onto an object, it starts spewing glitter all around the room when you touch it and it won't stop unless you know the counter-spell. We have enough to cover the entire office. I've been dying to try it."
Theo raises his eyebrows and turns back to Colin and I. "Can we go snap a couple pictures of that first?"
I roll my eyes at him. "You can go help Seamus with the glitter and I'll take Luna and Colin to Ravenclaw tower, how about that?"
Theo presses his lips together, visible torn. "Ravenclaw's more important," he finally says.
"I'll go with you, Seamus," Padma says.
"Are you sure you want to come with, Colin?" I turn back to him.
"Yes, I want to help." He straightens, looking at me intently.
"Ok," Neville says, pulling the map towards him. "That means we'll be running two operations at once. You four," he points at Theo, Luna, Colin and I, "will need to wait until Carrow has set off the glitter inferno in his office. Padma and Seamus, you should probably go while Carrow is at dinner. She eats fast, you'll only have about twenty minutes."
"That's plenty of time," Seamus interjects.
"Once she makes her way back to her office, you guys should probably go. You'll only have to worry about prefects and only a couple of those have dark marks. If you're seen by any of them, stun and obliviate them if you can. That goes for everyone."
"We know, Neville," Seamus says, as if he's heard this spiel a hundred times.
"We don't," Theo says, shooting him a look. "That means we'll have to leave the room before these two get back, doesn't it?" He asks Neville, who nods. "So, you should stay here and coordinate the whole thing with the map. You can alert us via coin if we get too close to any prefects."
"That's a good idea," Neville says, and Theo's ears turn a little redder, the corner of his mouth twitching.
"Do you know when Carrow usually goes to dinner?" I ask.
"Half six roughly," Neville says. "Then she locks the front gate at seven, heads to her office, sleeps until about midnight and then patrols the castle for the rest of the night. She has at least one Death Eater prefect on patrol between seven and midnight, so either Malfoy, Goyle or Crabbe."
My stomach churns at the mention of Draco and I notice Theo glance at me from the corner of my eye, but I ignore him.
Seamus pulls the map towards himself, "does anyone know where the Room let's us out today?"
"On the third floor, in the armoury gallery next to the trophy room," Alice chimes in before immediately returning to her food.
"Thanks," Seamus tells her.
"Students are sent straight back to their common rooms after dinner, right?" I ask Neville, who nods. "Seven thirty?" He nods again. "Where is Carrow's office?"
"Next to the muggle-studies classroom, first floor."
"So technically she can't run into us on our way to Ravenclaw tower," I say.
"I'll still keep an eye on her," Neville says. "She might run straight to Snape once she starts setting off the glitter. You should maybe leave a bit earlier."
I exchange a glance with Seamus. "Do you think it would be safe to leave at the same time?"
"I won't be able to keep an eye on everyone at once," Neville says. "Ten minutes for you guys to get to Carrow, then you lot can leave." He points at the respective groups.
We spend the afternoon training and once wit's done, Theo hands me Bellatrix' knife back and an arrangement of black leather straps I can't make anything of.
"What's that?" I hold it up between thumb and forefinger.
"A holster," Theo says. "it goes around your waist and thighs, left side is for the knife, right side for your wand." He grins at me. "I had the idea during lunch, thought it might come in handy later. I asked the Room for it, and it made a couple more for anyone else who might want one." He points at a heap of leather on the ground.
"They're brilliant, Theo!" Luna says, looking through the leather straps on the ground and picking out a pair with three sets of leather straps on one side, fit to hold three throwing stars.
He beams at her and picks out his own set, holding darts. "Poisoned darts," he whispers to me. "Not sure what kind of poison, but I trust the Room."
"I feel like we're using it too much…" I tell him.
"Are you kidding?" Theo says. "It clearly wants us to fight. Anytime I have any vague idea of a weapon, it provides instantly."
"You scare me," I say.
"Good," he grins.
He helps me pull on the leather straps. They fit snuggly around my upper thighs and waist, all held in place together by two leather straps running from waist-strap to thigh-strap along my hip and upper thigh, that hold the respective holsters. Bellatrix' knife fits securely into the left one, my wand into the right, just as Theo had planned. It all fits so tightly I have a feeling I shouldn't have a look at myself in the mirror or I'll have another go at Theo for his cheek.
"You look like a couple of Guerrilla fighters," Colin smirks when Luna and Theo finish putting on theirs.
"That's exactly what I was going for," Theo says. "Are you guys ready?"
Seamus and Padma left a few minutes earlier. Neville, along with Parvati and Lavender, is sitting down, the marauders map open on the table in front of him. "Carrow's at dinner as planned, the corridors are pretty much empty. It's Malfoy on patrol tonight, with Tracey Davies. They're on the second floor at the moment, so you should be safe still. Looks like they'll be going up the west staircase. Take the east staircase up. Luna, you know where to go."
She nods with a smile and motions for us to follow her. Theo, Colin and I follow Luna out of the room, the door opening up to the third-floor Armoury corridor, directly opposite the Trophy Room. It vanishes as soon as we close it behind us. We take a left turn, round the corner and go up the eastern staircase all the way up to the fifth floor, where Luna abruptly stops and consults her golden coin.
"Prefects are on the third floor now," she whispers. "Our common room is on the west side. Neville says Peeves is in the Hospital Wing corridor. It'll take a bit longer, but it's safer if we go by the Clock Tower from here. I'd really rather not run into Peeves."
"The little shit can't stand the Carrows either," Theo whispers. "I doubt he'd rat us out, but I don't want to risk it either. Lead the way, Luna."
We follow her, first I, then Collin, then Theo, away from the Hospital Wing and towards the Clock Tower. We make our way through it without running into anyone. Luna leads us to an inconspicuous little door that opens onto a very tight spiral staircase. We climb it up in single file, emerging in front of a simple wooden door, with nothing but a bronze, eagle-shaped doorknocker. It awakes when Luna knocks it.
"What is so fragile that saying its name breaks it?" It asks in an eerie, sing-song voice.
"Oh, I've had this one before!" Luna says and turns to us. "Anyone want to guess?"
"What's the answer, Lovegood," Theo says sternly.
She frowns at him, but the smile doesn't leave her face, and she says "Silence."
"Very good," the knocker says and the door swing inwards.
"You had to do this every day?" Theo asks indignantly.
"Of course, it's much safer than a password," she answers. "You wouldn't have gotten in, would you?" She winks at him.
Theo blows her a raspberry and quietly says to me, "imagine just wanting to get to bed after double potions and having to answer a damn riddle first."
"Sh," I make, even though the room is entirely deserted. It's light and airy, perfectly circular with high, ornate, arched windows all around and a fireplace in its centre, open at all sides. Behind it, in a nook in the wall directly opposite the entrance door, stands a large marble statue.
Luna points at it, "That's her."
"Colin," I say needlessly, as Colin already has his camera in hand.
"We're definitely all clear?" I ask.
Luna checks her coin again, and nods. "Draco and Tracey are on the fourth floor, we should take the eastern staircase again."
I follow Colin as he walks over to the statue. The diadem doesn't look particularly noteworthy, even if it wasn't made of marble. It doesn't look like it is adorned by gemstones of any kind. According to this statue, it consists of a single, flat band, braiding itself tightly over the forehead of its wearer. It looks simple, almost plain, yet it's striking in a different way, strangely familiar. Colin's camera clicks away as a wrack my brain. There's a whisper of a tiara like crown, but digging for it is almost painful. It's too hazy to dig out, and it bothers me.
"I got all angles," Colin whispers and pulls me out of my mind. "Let's go."
I stay rooted to my spot in front of the statue. "Pollux?" I hear Theo say quietly, but I raise my hand at him. "I have an idea," I say. "You guys go back, I'll only be a few minutes."
"You're not going off alone," Theo says sternly.
"It's better that way." I don't look at him. "Luna, who's the Ravenclaw ghost?"
"The Grey Lady," she says.
"Can I have your coin?" I ask her. She gives it to me without protest. I wave my wand over it, asking Neville to look for the Grey Lady.
"That's smart," Theo says appeasingly. "But you're still not going alone."
"Theo, I need you to get Colin back safely," I say. "And I need you do to it now. The Ravenclaw students are going to come up here in five minutes. It'll be much easier to hide on the way back if it's just me and I don't want to overwhelm the Grey Lady. Please."
He raises his finger at me, "if we had time for this argument-"
"Plus, I can handle Draco if I run into him."
Theo presses his lips together. "Creevey, Lovegood, let's go." He says and they follow Theo out of the door.
I wait another minute or so before following them down the dizzying staircase to the fifth floor corridor, vanishing into the nearest nook. The coin glows hot in my hand with Neville informing me that the Grey Lady is in classroom 5B, one corridor over, Draco and Tracey are making their way up. I have to be quick. I make a run for it, trying to be as quiet as I possibly can. The door to the classroom is closed and I quickly push through it, letting it fall shut softly.
The Grey Lady, tall, wrapped in a floor-length cloak and with long, silvery hair, freezes when I enter. She straightens herself, looking down at me. "Students shouldn't be roaming at this time," she says haughtily.
The Grey Lady is about to vanish through the blackboard. "No!" I yell. "Please, I just need five minutes."
She stops, stares down at me.
"I need your help," I say. When she still doesn't say I word, I say, "I was wondering if you could tell me anything about the lost diadem of Ravenclaw."
Her eyebrow shoots up. "My mother's diadem would not be permitted during exams. If you seek good grades, study," and she turns back towards the blackboard.
"My brother needs it," I say quickly. "To defeat You know Who. We need to find the diadem and destroy it or we'll never be able to beat him." She doesn't move and I take a few steps towards her, around a few student desks, stopping a few feet from her, "please."
"I don't see how the diadem could help you in that endeavour either," she says, with little conviction behind it.
I debate quietly for a moment, whether I should reveal to her, that we will need to destroy it, but ultimately go for, "do you know if You-Know-Who knows where the diadem is?"
The coin in my hand glows hot, but I ignore it. She lowers her eyes for the first time since I entered the room and her arrogance crumbles just the slightest bit. She nods.
"He used it," I continue.
"Not for its intended purpose," she says quietly.
"I know," I say. "But we can fix it. We're trying to, at least."
She purses her lips. "This diadem has destroyed a lot of things, Miss Potter. In the wrong hands, it could do extraordinary damage."
"That's why we're looking to destroy it," I say firmly.
To my amazement, she smirks. "It's in the castle," she says and my heart leaps. "If you have to ask, you will never know. If you know, you may only ask."
Before I can ask "what?" she has already vanished into the next room. I take a few steps after her, ready to scream for her to come back, but before I can do so the classroom door creaks open behind me.
I whip around, pulling my wand out of its holster in one swift, quick motion and point it straight between Draco's eyes. He freezes, his eyes fixed on mine, perfect, unreadable mask in place. We stare at each other for what feels like minutes, my heart thumping in my chest, my stomach doing summersaults as he holds my glare.
"What is it Draco?" A female voice from the corridor makes my blood run cold.
I raise my finger to my lips, indicating for him to keep his mouth shut. Finally, he blinks and gives me the tiniest of nods, before leaving the room and closing the door. "Just Filch's bloody cat," I hear him say to Tracey.
I keep my wand pointed at the door for another thirty seconds, just in case, before giving the burning coin any attention.
MALFOY IS COMING. It reads, and I purse my lips at it.
I'm fine. I send back, and then pull my own coin out of my pocket, the one I use to communicate with Hermione. We have a breakthrough.
Excellent, stay put. She sends back almost immediately, and then: Gringotts in a few days.