Nessie's POV
It was a typical Friday night at Embry's place, where Leah, Jake, Quil, and I had gathered. Claire was off on a weekend trip to Seattle with her parents. Our initial plan for a movie night had taken a back seat as conversations became the main focus instead of the film playing on the screen. Amidst the lively chatter, I found myself in the kitchen preparing another bowl of popcorn and M&Ms when Embry suddenly called out my name.
"Ness! Your phone is ringing!"
Worried it might be my parents, known for their overreaction if I missed a call, I asked, "Who's calling? Is it my parents?"
"Caller ID says Felix," Embry replied.
I dashed to the living room at vampire speed, snatching my phone and promptly declining the call. Jacob, ever the tease, couldn't resist commenting, "Ohhhhhh. Who's that?"
"My ex," I responded.
"You guys still talk?"
"Not really. He tries to reach out every few months."
Leah, always ready with a bitchy comment, chimed in, "Awe, did he break your heart or something? Is that why you play the whole 'I don't date' drama-queen act?" Her nightly snark was getting on my nerves.
"I broke up with him," I clarified.
After looking at me a moment, she grabbed my hand, yanking me out of the house. "Come on, we're hitting the Carver Cafe. Girl's night."
We sped off to Forks, heading straight to the only restaurant in town. Snagging a corner booth, we dove into a mix of stories between sips of our drinks. The night took an unexpected turn as we gossiped, exchanging stories about past boyfriends and embarrassing crushes.
"Mind if I ask you something?" I glanced at Leah, hesitant not to disrupt her surprisingly upbeat mood.
"Go ahead."
"Not that I'm not enjoying our time, but I'm a bit surprised you chose to hang out with me tonight. I always sensed you weren't my biggest fan."
Leah chuckled. "I'm a bit of a bitch to everyone, not just you. But yeah, initially, I wasn't on Team Nessie."
"What changed? Did my sparkling personality win you over?" I teased
She grinned. "It's the way you treat Jake. He's been thinking a lot about the bonfire night.I catched glimpses of it when we phase. You established clear boundaries, you don't lead him on. I respect that."
"Thanks. I genuinely don't want to hurt the guy. It's cool that you're keeping an eye out for him."
"After witnessing how your mom treated him, I was worried you might do the same."
"What?" I looked at her, genuinely perplexed. I thought Jake and my mom were on good terms during her time in Forks?
She continued. "Yeah, it was horrible. Being with him, going back to your dad,back and forth… She played with him like a toy." My stomach sank, the weight of the revelation settling like a stone. It felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the bar at once. My mom... and Jacob?
Leah now looked panicked. "Shit. I mean, I thought you knew." she frantically explained, but her words became muffled as a strange ringing filled my ears. I felt like I was going to pass out or something. Could hybrids even pass out?
Hastily, I dropped my credit card onto the table and abruptly stood up, perhaps a bit too fast for a public setting.
"Here, it's my treat. I think I'm going to be sick. Sorry, I got to go" I uttered while hurrying towards the exit. Once in my car, I sped away, leaving the scene at an almost absurd pace.
Usually, driving had a calming effect on my nerves, but today, it just wasn't doing the trick. My heart seemed to be echoing loudly in my chest, a sensation that caught me off guard. Emotional outbursts weren't my usual style. As time passed, the distress escalated to the point where my eyes became too blurry to drive safely.
I swerved into the nearest exit, ending up in a McDonald's parking lot. I closed my eyes and leaned on the wheel, pressing my lids tightly shut, determined not to let any tears escape. The vulnerability of tears was the facet of my humanity I despised the most. Why did crying have to be so noticeable? It felt humiliating.
Leah's words reverberated through my mind in a disorienting loop. It was unfathomable — he had dated my mom, and now, had imprinted on me. The realization hit me hard, and my thoughts spiraled into confusion. Was he pretending to be interested in me, maybe even romantically, just because he couldn't have my mom? Did he see me as some sort of consolation prize?
Questions swirled in my head, and the distress clouded my ability to think clearly. Why had my mom kept this from me, or worse, Jake? As far as I could recall, she never mentioned dating anyone before my dad. I attempted to force myself to think rationally, but the overwhelming feelings of betrayal and jealousy drowned out any coherent thoughts. I was aware that all of this had unfolded before my birth, and I knew Jake had a dating history. Yet, why did it matter so intensely now?
Normally, in moments like these, I'd reach out to Rosalie for advice. She and Emmett, my godparents, had practically raised me. I was just about to dial her number when a knock echoed on my car window. No scent was required; I knew exactly who it was.
Keeping a facade of composure was crucial. My outburst of panic at the bar was already embarrassing enough, and I didn't want to let Jacob in on how deeply the revelation had affected me. I unlocked the car, and he slid into the passenger seat.
"Ness… Leah told me what happened. You have to let me explain."
I stared straight ahead of me, refusing to meet his eyes. I had a feeling that if I did, I would start screaming at him, or even worse, cry.
"We're just friends. I guess, It's none of my business who you dated or not," I replied coldly.
"We didn't even date. I swear, we kissed once. That's it."
What did he expect, that the fact they only kissed instead of dating made it okay? I shot him a look of disgust.
"I don't care. If there's any other of my relatives you've also made out with, I don't want to hear about it either" I retorted rudely. His jaw clenched, frustration written all over his face.
"Don't give me this "I don't care" shit, I can clearly tell you've been crying. We need to talk about this," he insisted.
That comment was my last straw. I whipped around, my voice escalating to a scream. "Oh, now you want to talk about it! A bit late, isn't it? Where was that energy before ?! " I stopped, panting, my chest heaving with anger and hurt. Jacob's expression softened, and he reached out to touch my hand. I jerked it away, my gaze fixed on the steering wheel. The air thickened with tension as I struggled to regain composure.
"I'm sorry, I didn't tell you before, I really am. Truth be told, I didn't even think about it, it was so long ago… It's not like I still had feelings for her, and then met you. I moved on years ago. I didn't think a single kiss would have mattered."
I scoffed, bitterness creeping into my tone. "Maybe not to you. But it matters to me, being the second choice."
"It's not like that, you're not—" Jacob started, but I interrupted him.
"No, Jake, I've been second best to her my entire life," I admitted with a heavy sigh. "People always compare me to my mom. She's kind of a big deal in the vampire world, with her self-control and her gift and all that. And I just know, no matter how I try, I will never be as pretty, as flawless, as talented. I'm loud, I'm opinionated, it took me years to master my talent, and I have so many human flaws."
His eyes softened, a hint of understanding flickering across his face. Still, my frustration fueled the words pouring out. I had never spoken about this out loud, but Jake always had this weird effect on me. Only with him was I ever capable of articulating my deepest most embarrassing thoughts.
"I know it's stupid and immature, it's not like it's a competition or anything… I just.. I guess… Growing up around flawless-looking vampires sucked. If she was a big part of your life, I will never compare."
For a moment, silence hung heavily between us. I could feel his gaze on me, and when I finally looked at him, his eyes held a mix of regret and understanding.
"Ness, I never meant for you to feel like a second choice. I get it, I really do. But I could never compare what I felt towards Bella with my friendship with you. Since I met you… well, I've never felt happier. I don't want to play the victim or anything, but it was kinda horrible, the way she treated me back then."
"Did you love her?"
I took one good look into Jacob's eyes, knowing I would see right away if he was lying.
"At the time, Yeah, I thought I did. I was 15, and a little bit of a drama queen. As I grew up and dated other girls, I realized it was never love, not the real thing, no."
As the weight of Jacob's words settled in, bittersweet clarity crept in. The whole situation sucked, but deep down, I knew being mad at him wouldn't change the past. He seemed to regret it, and it wasn't like he could've known he'd end up imprinting on me when he was fifteen. There was probably no point in holding on to this anger.
"Alright," I gave Jake a soft smile, the heaviness of our conversation gradually dissipating.
"Alright?"
"Yeah... I mean, it might take me a while to fully wrap my head around this... but it won't kill me." I winked at him, a silent agreement to let go, at least for now.
"So... while we're here... You wanna get McDonald's?" Jacob gave me a sheepish smile.
"Really? I love McDonald's. It's my comfort food."
"Me too! The pack always gives me shit about it; they think it's gross."
We wrapped up the night with a visit to the drive-thru. I stuck to my tried-and-true combo – a cheeseburger, an Oreo McFlurry, and a Coke. Meanwhile, Jacob seemed determined to order every item on the menu. We parked, indulged in our fast-food feast, and then, at Jacob's request, I chauffeured him to his sister Rachel and Paul's house.
Mischief struck me like lightning as we entered the house. Without a second thought, I bolted toward an unsuspecting Rachel and planted a big kiss on her mouth. Turning to Jake, I playfully shouted, "Family for family! Now, we're even, Black!" before making a swift exit. Sprinting back to my car, Jacob's booming laughter echoed behind me.