Fran's Secret

by BinBagBrain

Fran has been keeping a secret and has been suffering all alone. Can Max get her to open up to him? *Total soap opera drama! Remember, none of this is real or even necessarily accurate! Have fun with the fantasy! This is a work in progress, so let me know if you want me to keep going!

29. Chapter 29

A couple of hours later, Max was wrapping up his stack of work and Fran was still asleep beside him. Max heard a noise and turned his head to look towards the stairs, then saw Niles come around the corner into the room. He gestured to him to be quiet and not wake Fran. Niles came over to see Fran dead asleep next to Max, and a concerned expression came over his face.

"Is everything alright?" He whispered.

"I think so, she just got really tired all of a sudden and wanted to lie down."

Niles nodded, but was still concerned. "I was just going to ask about lunch- was there anything in particular you both might like?"

"Why don't we get her a shake? She can have something else with it if she wants. And for me, something light. Maybe some kind of salad? Would that be alright? I can start waking her up in a minute. It's not too long before we'll need to get ready to leave."

"Very good, sir. I'll get right on it." Niles took another worried look at Fran, then scurried back to the kitchen.

Max finished up his work and set everything down on the coffee table, then got up and moved over to sit by Fran's side.

"Sweetheart, it's time to wake up!" He said, rubbing her arm gently. "Fran, darling?" Fran moved a little and made a soft grumbling noise. "Sweetheart? It's time to wake up, alright? We need to get some lunch and then get ready to go to our appointment. Okay?" Fran stirred a little and blinked open her eyes.

"What?" She was disoriented.

"It's almost 11:45, darling. You've been asleep for quite a while."

"What? I fell asleep? I didn't mean to fall asleep!" She turned her head to look around the room, and noticed the blanket on her. Max helped her sit up.

"You got really tired really fast. You fell asleep right away. Niles is getting lunch together. I told him to get you a shake, and he may be making a salad, too. We'll take the car at about 12:30. Is that enough time for you?" Fran grabbed his wrist and looked at his watch.

"Geez. I'm so out of it! Oh no! My dress! And my makeup! Oh, my hair!"

"Darling, you're fine! Just a little touch up, nothing major. And you didn't move at all, so your dress should be fine."

"Why did I fall asleep like that? I don't feel like I have a fever." She checked her forehead and neck.

"I don't think you have a fever. Maybe it was just stress. But I do want you to check your temperature before we eat. Do you want to go do that now?" He asked, stroking the side of her face.

"Uh, yeah. I need to get up and walk around a bit. I'll go up and sort myself out, and come back down for lunch. Where are we eating?"

"We can just eat in the kitchen. I figured a light lunch would be good in case Niles is making us a big feast for dinner."

"Oh yeah, the seafood thing. He seemed pretty excited about that. Okay, I better go sort myself out. Should we meet back in the kitchen?"

"Sure, sweetheart. Here, let me help you up." Max got up and moved the blanket off of her and took her hands to help her stand. He held her for a moment to make sure she was steady on her feet.

"Max, can you grab my heels? I think I'm gonna change my shoes in case we do any walking." Max reached down under the coffee table to retrieve her shoes and handed them to her.

"Hold that rail as you go up, in case you're still really tired, okay?"

"I will, thank you, baby. I'll be back down in a little bit." Max kissed her lightly and watched her as she walked to the staircase, then as she held onto the rail as she walked up and disappeared. He slipped his own shoes back on and grabbed his stack of work papers and took them back to his office, then came back, grabbed their bottles of water, and headed to the kitchen.

Niles was chopping several types of lettuce for their salad in the kitchen when Max came through the door. Max set the water bottles on the table.

"Fran's just gone upstairs to freshen up. She'll be down in a few minutes," Max said. He leaned back against the counter and was quiet.

"May I ask how she's doing?" Niles said.

Max looked over at him. "I think she's alright, but I asked her to check her temperature just to be safe. I don't know what happened. We sort of had a- a conversation. A pretty heavy one. And afterwards, I don't know. I wondered if it was from stress, if she'd been carrying a lot of stress from not talking about it, and after we talked, I think she felt a lot of relief. I wondered if she was maybe coming down from stress she didn't realize she had. But she'd mentioned that before she had gotten really tired sometimes. I don't think it always coincides with the fever. I just hope she doesn't have to keep going through this after the surgery. I just want her to get better. To feel better. You know?"

"Yes, sir. Yes I do." They were quiet for a little while.

"Oh, she might have some salad or something, too. I just kind of wanted her to have at least some of a shake, too. Just to make sure she's getting the nutrition she needs." Max was quiet, then chuckled.

"What?" Niles asked.

"I was just remembering… Fran said we have so many things to tell the therapist about that it will make her head spin." He chuckled again, and Niles joined him.

"Well, I'm glad you two are talking about everything now. I know it will make both of you feel so much better," Niles said.

"Yes. It really does." He walked over to the fridge to look for something to drink, but couldn't decide.

"Oh, sir, if you might be interested- I made some iced coffee in there if you'd like any. It's in that small white pitcher there- yes that one."

"That does sound good. I wonder if Fran might like some."

"Well, if she's still trying to wake up, I would say there's a good chance. Here, I can make it for you if you can start by filling two glasses with ice, and then about three-quarters of the way up with ice water."

Max went to the cabinet and retrieved two glasses as Niles took out the cream and a tub of cottage cheese for them to have with lunch. Max headed back to the fridge for the ice and water, and Niles tossed the salad he had made and took out two pears from the fruit bowl on the counter and washed them off, then began peeling and slicing them. Max brought the glasses back to the counter and set them down near Niles.

"Could you get me a long tea spoon from the drawer?"

"Sure," Max said, and then pulled out a spoon and handed it to him. He poured out some of the concentrated brew into each glass, and then seemed to know the perfect amount of cream to add.

"Now, for yours I would recommend two spoonfuls of sugar, but we might wait for Ms. Fine to decide how much for hers, in case she doesn't want as much."

"Oh, alright." As Max got the sugar for his coffee and began to stir it, Fran came down the back stairs, looking a little more refreshed but still a little pale. She smiled at Max and Niles as they looked over at her.

"Here I am! A little more put-together now," she said. Max reached out his hands for her and she hurried over to him and went in for a hug.

"Darling, would you like some of the iced coffee Niles made? I haven't put any sugar in yours yet, but if you don't want it, that's alright, too."

"Oh, I want it! I need to wake up. I've had my nap for the day!" Max finished stirring his drink and put the spoon into her glass, and she added sugar to hers, stirred it, then tasted it. "Oh, Niles! That's yummy! So smooth!"

"Oh good! Glad you like it! Now why don't the both of you have a seat and I'll get you served. Ms. Fine, would you like some salad along with a shake?"

"Yes please! I might only have half the shake, if it's filling. And I can finish it later this afternoon." She took another sip of coffee and went to sit down at the kitchen table with Max. "Oh, Niles, you must keep some of this cold coffee in the fridge all the time! I really like it!"

"Yes, ma'am! I will definitely do that!" Niles went to get the silverware and and grabbed several napkins, then set their places, as well as one for him. He walked back to a cabinet and took out three smaller plates, then scooped out his fresh salad onto each of them, then made a circle of pear slices in the center of each, and finally used an ice cream scoop to put a rounded scoop of cottage cheese on top of the pears on each plate. Lastly, he drizzled each with a sweet raspberry dressing. He brought their plates over first and set them down, then hurried to the fridge to get her shake, came back, and set it next to her coffee. He then retrieved his own plate, grabbed his glass of water, and came back to join them at the table.

"Thank you, Niles," Max said. "This looks really good."

"It does, Niles!" Fran agreed.

"Oh, you're welcome! I haven't made this in ages."

Fran opened her shake and took a swig. "Oh! Niles, I have a question to ask you…" Fran said.

"Sure, what is it Ms. Fine?"

"Are you doing anything two weeks from saturday?" She smiled.

"Two weeks from saturday? Well, I don't believe I've made any plans. Why do you ask?"

"Well, because I just got four tickets to the big bridal expo! Ma's coming, and Val's going to see if she can. So there's one more ticket, and I thought I should ask you first or you probably would never forgive me!" They all laughed.

"Well I'm very flattered you would think of me! So there's going to be a bridal expo? Where is it?"

"It's at that same place where they have those toy shows- but I don't think it would take up that much space. They probably have it separated down to a smaller section, but still! It should be huge."

"But wait- two weeks? Might that be too soon for you to be going out and doing things like that?"

"I told her that my one requirement would be that she goes in a wheelchair, Niles. I don't want her on her feet that much. But that would also mean someone has to be pushing the wheelchair- she can't be trying to do that herself either."

"Oh, goodness, no. But I'm surprised you're asking me, I would have thought you would want to take Margaret with you."

"Well, that's still a possibility, if you or Val don't go. But I know you'd probably like to be involved in some of the planning, so this seemed like the perfect opportunity." She took another few sips of her coffee and went back to her salad.

"Oh, my goodness, though! I still can't believe all of this is really happening! It's just so wonderful! Can I give you a tentative yes, and then I'll make sure there isn't anything else I may need to do that day?"

"Sure, Niles. Oh, sweetie, we need to find out where we can rent or borrow a wheelchair. Maybe the hospital does that sort of thing?"

"Oh, sure. Yes, I wouldn't be surprised if they did. Niles, by any chance, could you perhaps look into that? If the hospital doesn't arrange things like that, then I'm sure there's some kind of place that can rent them. We'll make sure you have something before then."

"I can absolutely look into that for you. But might I ask, won't you be going with Ms, Fine to the bridal expo? I mean, it's your wedding, too."

"Well, I could, but I just thought since she'd probably be cooped up in the house for quite a bit by then, that Fran might want a fun girls' day out. Oh, no offense, Niles!"

"None taken! I totally understand. And you might be right, that seems like quite a fun outing for you, Ms. Fine. So you asked your mother already? What did she say?"

Fran wiped her mouth. "Oh, Niles! She was flipping out! I don't know which one of us will have more fun, me or her!" They all laughed again.

"So how did you find out about this expo? I haven't heard anything about it."

"The ad was in the paper today. Max was teasing me about it because he saw it first, and of course it was in the arts and entertainment section, which is the only section I look at, but I just looked at the funnies and the advice columns, and it was right before that. So he said it was too bad I didn't read the whole section, and he was being weird, so I was like, why are you being weird? And then I had to get the paper back, and I went through absolutely everything. I thought it was some article about maybe Barbra was coming to town or something, but there wasn't, and then I saw it! I was flipping out! And Max got his credit card out and said go get four tickets, so I did! Isn't it wonderful!" She reached for Max next to her and put her arms around his neck and kissed him.

"Oh it is wonderful, Ms. Fine! What a wonderful thing to look forward to!" They were all smiles and went back to their lunches, and savored their iced coffees, and Fran drank as much of the shake as she could. When they were finished, Max started gathering up the dishes and brought them to the sink. "Oh, sir, let me clean up the lunch mess. You two need to leave here in a minute, so leave the cleaning to me, won't you?"

"Alright, Niles. Fran, do you have everything you need for the appointment?" Max asked, rubbing her shoulders as she sat.

"Yes, unless- do you think we need to bring any papers from the doctor? I mean, I guess we don't need to prove anything to her. Do we?"

"No, I'm pretty sure that's something she would take our word on. But you are bringing your prescription aren't you?"

"Yep! In my purse!"

"Okay, then, if you're finished, maybe we should go get our coats and wait for the car?"

"Sure. Niles, do you need anything while we're out? I don't know what stores are around where the therapist's office is, but we might walk around a bit down there before we come back."

"Oh, I can't think of anything I may need. But you should keep an eye out for any books or magazines or even games or something that will keep you occupied while you recover."

"Yeah, I need to remember to do that."

"Well, okay then- let's get going, darling. Oh, Niles- I'll have the cell with me in case you need to reach us, but our appointment is for two hours, so I'd just ask that there not be any interruptions during that, unless, of course, it's an emergency," Max said.

"Very good, sir! And I'll be busy all afternoon working on dinner, so I'll be here if you need to reach me. And I promise to not sneak a look at the photos until after you two have seen them…" Niles smiled.

"Oh, my gosh! I can't wait! Did you finish writing the announcement?" Fran asked.

"I'm nearly done. I thought I would see if Brighton could type it up on his computer so we could have copies, and give a typed version to the newspaper tomorrow morning."

"Oh, gosh, I can barely stand it! Everyone's going to know by sunday! Oh, I can't wait to see the pictures!" Niles and Max smiled, and Max helped Fran get up from the table.

"Alright, Niles, the house is all yours until Brighton comes home. Hopefully we'll be back before the girls get home, but we'll see," Max said, taking Fran's hand.

"And thank you for the lunch, it was just the right amount!" Fran said.

"Yes, thank you Niles," Max agreed.

"Well, you're very welcome! And we'll see you when you get back!"

Max followed Fran through the door to the dining room, still holding her hand. They headed through the hallways to the front stairs, and Max looked out the front windows.

"I don't see it yet, but should be any minute now," he said. "Here, let's get your coat on," he took her long, dark coat out of the closet and helped her on with it, then grabbed his own coat and put it on. He helped her button up, and she helped him, then they both put on their gloves and sorted out their scarves, then Max looked outside again. "There he is! You ready? Got your purse?"

"Yep! Oh, hang on! Let me run and grab that paper with the ticket info for the expo on it. I don't want to lose that in case the tickets don't show up." She hurried over to the coffee table to retrieve the paper as Max watched, and then she hurried back to his waiting hands.

"You look a lot less tired than earlier. How are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling alright. I think that coffee helped. I'm just hoping that that fatigue doesn't kick in again, otherwise I'll have to fight it pretty hard. But right now I feel good. Let's get going!"

Max opened the door for her and they hurried to the waiting car and got in, and they were whisked away off to their therapy appointment.

They entered the therapist's office, and were directed to take off their coats and have a seat wherever they might feel most comfortable. They chose to sit on a lush purple velvet loveseat near the center of the room, and the therapist sat across from them in a mid-century modern cream-colored leather-and-metal chair, with soft, curving lines. Fran loved the way the office was decorated, and how well the seemingly mis-matched furniture actually seemed to go well together.

"I really love the decor in here! Did you pick out all this yourself?" Fran asked.

"I'd like to take all the credit for it, but I did have some help from a decorator. I showed her a lot of pictures and color swatches, and she ran around the city to find the right pieces. I like how it turned out, too," the woman said. Max and Fran sat down on the sofa after removing their coats and scarves and gloves and draping them over another chair. "So, before we start, and especially since this is a long session, if you two might need anything to drink, at any time, there are water bottles and sodas, tea and juices in that small fridge over there." She pointed to a mini fridge against the wall on the other side of the office.

"I think I'm alright for now, how about you, Max?" Fran asked.

"I'm fine for now, thank you."

"Okay, then. Let's get started! What is it that brings you two here today?"

Fran looked over at Max and squeezed his hand. "Well, we were kind of joking that if we told you everything that's been going on recently, it would make your head spin."

"Really? So I take it at least some of the things that have been going on must be causing both of you some stress? Why don't we start with the biggest issues, and we can fill in any gaps along the way. Would one of you like to be the one to start?" Fran and Max looked at each other.

"Why don't you start, dear? You can start with the most pressing concern, then I can speak about the past. If you want."

Fran nodded. "Well, okay. Um, I am facing some urgent health issues right now. Specifically, I'm scheduled to go in for surgery Monday morning to have a tumor in my abdomen removed. I've been going through some fevers and fatigue. Last weekend I had a pretty high fever and Max almost had to take me to the hospital. And, uh, this morning I got hit with a bout of fatigue or something and fell asleep on the couch. And, well, from what the doctors said, it looks like I may have been dealing with this tumor for maybe two months or so, and it's a fast growing tumor. I hadn't been feeling well off and on, then started getting fevers. Sometimes I can get some discomfort in the area where the tumor is. I've only known for about two weeks that it was a tumor. I went to the ER by myself a couple weeks ago because I wasn't feeling good at all, and I was a little concerned that it could be appendicitis. They did an ultrasound and found the tumor. I didn't tell Max until Friday night. You see, our relationship has been a little complicated. But after we talked about all of this, we just kind of got everything out in the open, and Max asked me to be his girlfriend. And then," she smiled and looked at her rings, "Then he proposed to me. So, let's just say that our relationship progressed pretty fast. But in a way, it wasn't so fast, because we've known each other for several years and we - well, we've crossed the line quite a few times, but- Max, do you want to take over?"

"Sure, I can do that. Let's see… well, just some background- I am a widower with three children. I lost my wife to cancer about seven years ago. Things were very difficult for a good while after that, I just sort of detached from everything. I could have lost my business, and the children weren't doing so well. Niles, our butler, was taking care of everything to do with the household, plus he had to take care of the children. And when the day finally came where I was able to focus on work again, I tried to hire a nanny for the children so Niles wouldn't be so burdened. Well, it was one nanny after another. I don't know if it was solely because my son was scaring them off with his antics, or if it was other reasons, but no one wanted to stay and build a relationship with the children. Maybe it was more work than they wanted to do.

"So one weekend came where I was having a big party at the house to try to gain some new backers, and I had no nanny and no one to watch the children. And here comes Fran. She was selling makeup door to door, and things sort of transpired that she tried for the nanny job. So I gave her a trial run that weekend. The children loved her immediately, but I was a bit of a jerk and I- I uh, fired her right after the party ended. Then I had to swallow my pride and go beg her to come back, and she's been with us ever since. Well, things happened now and then, and we sort of developed feelings for each other, but it was complicated. She worked for me, so it felt like I was taking advantage. That's what my father is like, and I said I'd never be like him. And it wasn't just that, I hadn't dated at all since my wife passed. It just didn't feel right, it felt like cheating. I should have been in therapy back then, but I wasn't. Fran's taught me a lot, she's taught all of us a lot. And it was hard not to fall for her.

"So, I noticed a little bit that something seemed to be off with her. She was avoiding us, avoiding me especially. I wish I had found a way to talk to her sooner, but she was never around. There was always some reason or excuse that she would have, then she would be gone. So last Friday, my son was going to be spending the weekend at his friend's house, so she decided to take the girls out that night and have a sleepover at her mother's house. But something was just- different. Really different. Niles and I talked about it, and he was worried, too. We wondered if she might be in a depression, her behavior was so different than usual. So after Niles and I had talked, and my stomach was in knots by then, I called her friend Val to see if she had any insight. Val said she noticed the difference, too. So then all three of us were worried. So Val ran over to Fran's parents' place to see if Fran would talk to her. Then Val calls me and says to come get Fran right away. I did. That was a difficult night, but Fran showed me the medical papers from the hospital. And we just talked a lot, about so much stuff. And we stayed with each other that night. She had a fever that night, so I finally got to see what was happening. We've been together ever since. She had another, really bad one Sunday night. It was pretty awful, and she couldn't take her medication for it, because of testing they had to do. She had her follow up appointment on Monday, and they told us she was on the schedule for surgery this coming Monday, that they don't want to wait. They won't know what kind of tumor it is until it's removed. So, I've taken a bit of time off from work to stay with Fran. We sort of adopted that idea that life is too short, all that excess just isn't important when someone you love is suffering. I had to get over myself and my issues fast. I knew I loved her, and that was what mattered. We don't want to waste any more time."

The therapist had been taking notes rapidly as he talked, and looked up to nod in understanding every now and then. She leaned back in her seat and thought for a moment.

"That is a lot to be dealing with. So you two discussed your feelings for each other less than a week ago?" They nodded. "And how did you both feel once you knew you both loved each other- once you said it to each other?" Max looked over at Fran and smiled.

"So much relief," Fran said. "I mean, I guess you could say in the back of my mind I knew he did, but for him to step up and say it, and show it, too, it was like all the weight I'd been carrying around was gone. I wasn't dealing with everything alone anymore, and it felt so good. And it kind of felt like opening the floodgates, I guess you could say." Max chuckled and nodded his head. The therapist looked over at him.

"Yes, it has felt like that. But it felt good that it was that way. I'd been holding things back for so long, and finally telling her that I really love her- I really needed to do that. I was so worried about her. I decided right then that I wasn't going to be that repressed jerk anymore. It was too hard. I felt guilt about having treated her the way I had. I still feel guilty about it. But we talked about that, too, that I was afraid. I still wore my wedding band, for goodness sake. I probably didn't grieve the right way, I probably didn't get closure. Because it wasn't like I had gotten a divorce and could be mad at an ex-wife and then it would be easier to separate myself from that. I told Fran that I hadn't expected her. I didn't expect to find my best friend, and fall for her, and that the children would be the ones to teach me how to do that. How to love her. She's a part of the family, she always has been. And finally allowing myself to open up to her- that was everything." He squeezed Fran's hand in his and she rubbed his arm.

"He's been really wonderful to me. He's been taking care of me really well, and the other night, when I had the really bad fever, he had to get me to the tub to get cold water on me to try to bring my fever down. I wasn't waking up. I can't imagine how bad that had to scare him. I had no idea what was going on, I was out cold. Luckily I had my doctor's appointment the next morning, so we let them know what happened. I just hope once I have the surgery, that all of that will stop. That all I need to do is heal and everything will be fine. But we know the possible outcomes, and I think maybe we both are scared of that. We're stuck in this limbo, we don't have any control over it."

"May I ask what kind of possible outcomes there could be? What it is that you're both afraid of?" The therapist asked.

"Well, they did an MRI, and another ultrasound. The tumor had already grown more in like a week and a half. It could turn out that it's an aggressive cancer. They didn't see any evidence of other tumors, which is good, but I will still have to be monitored in the future to make sure I don't get another one. Because if I do, it could be anywhere. Right now I'm lucky because it isn't invading my intestines or any organs, but it could if I don't have surgery really quick to remove it. Once they remove it, it goes straight to the lab so they can make sure the wall of it wasn't compromised- so they know that it couldn't release cancer cells, or even benign tumor cells. Then they'll biopsy it and figure out what created it. If it's cancer, and if there could be more cells in me, there's a chance of having to go through chemo. And, uh, going through chemo would mean it could destroy my ability to have a child. They gave us some information on that at the doctor but I hadn't looked at it yet. But this morning- that was what Max and I talked about before I had that sudden fatigue. I think I was afraid that Max didn't want any more kids, and I do want children. So we got that out in the open, and he said that he would like children with me. And if it comes down to it- if I have to freeze my eggs, or embryos, and even find a surrogate- he'd help me figure that out. I felt a huge weight off of me after that, too. Maybe I was carrying around some stress from worrying about what he might say- I wondered if that was why I came crashing down so hard that I ended up falling asleep. But it could just be coincidence that it was just another wave from the tumor. I don't know, but I know it really made me feel so much better, talking to him about it like that." Max put his arm around her and pulled her to him.

"Well, that's great to hear that you talked about it. That is a pretty huge deal. And if your relationship is pretty new, that can be a really difficult thing to figure out how to talk about. But it sounds like you two are creating some new patterns of behavior to try to make sure you don't have those old problematic issues coming up again. Do you feel like that's what you are doing?"

"Yes, absolutely. We even talked to the kids about it. I apologized to everyone for not going to anyone for help, for keeping things to myself. We made a promise to talk to each other more, about everything. I won't keep secrets about my health, and everyone else is supposed to find someone they can talk to as well. We told them therapy is on the table, if anyone is having a hard time, or just needs to talk. No more secrets. No more trying to handle things alone," Fran said.

"I'm glad to hear that. And Fran, I know you will need some time to recover after your surgery, and it might be difficult to get out of the house and go to a therapy session, so if you need to talk to me or anyone, it may be possible to arrange something by phone if you need it. You can't know the future right now, so things may come up that you don't necessarily expect- and it could be easy to get caught up in it and forget to say you need help. So if you want to schedule a post-operative appointment, we can do that. It might be a way to help relieve any lingering tension you may have and still weren't aware of. And there could be new things that come up that you have to deal with. So would you be up for scheduling a followup? Maybe next week? We can talk over the phone, that won't be a problem."

Fran looked at Max and he nodded and stroked her back. "Okay, we can do that. I don't know how long I have to stay home before I can go out, or even walk up and down the stairs at the house. I do have to go back to see the doctors after the surgery, but I don't know when yet. So, yes, let's do that. Keeping in the spirit of open communication and all."

"Good, good! And Max, this means you, too. I know you're carrying a lot of worry about her right now, and I'm sure that will continue after the surgery. You might be worried you might hurt her, or someone else might. You'll probably want to be the one who does everything for her. So I want you to have a follow up to address all those things, alright?"

"Uh, yes, sure. I can do that." Fran smiled at him and patted his hand. The therapist wrote a few more notes on her notepad.

"Now, tell me about the children. I'm assuming they know you two are together now? Why don't you tell me about them." Fran looked up at Max, encouraging him to start first.

"Well, Margaret is the oldest. She's going to Columbia. Before Fran came, she was a shy wallflower, not many friends. She was a sort of surrogate mother to my youngest, Grace. Now she's very popular at school, she has lots of friends, goes on lots of dates. She's really grown up, she has lots of confidence. Fran gave her that. All three of the children are much more confident now.

"Brighton, he's the only son, he's in the middle. He started high school, and I know he's very worried about Fran. He's even doing a study project at school to learn more about her tumor, how it happens, all of that. Before Fran, I think it was his coping mechanism to be the class clown, he got into trouble a lot. I was really worried he'd meet someone who would lead him own a really bad path. But Fran stopped that right away. She let him know he couldn't get away with anything with her, so he stopped getting in trouble. Now all of his pranks are just with his sisters, just what a brother is supposed to do. I know he loves his sisters, so that's how he shows his affection. He's still pretty shy with girls, but I think it's because he hasn't met anyone his age who is like Fran, because I know he had a pretty big crush on her. He's also- he uh, has this facial tic that came back after Fran talked to them about what was going on. And Niles and I remembered that after his mother passed, he had done the same thing. If it doesn't go away after her surgery, we may need to get him into counseling. I think it hurts his feelings when he hears that Fran might be suffering. So we're keeping an eye on him, but we don't want to embarrass him by calling attention to it. We asked Maggie to keep an eye out for him, too.

"And then there's Grace, she's the youngest. She'll be turning ten. She's been in therapy since about the time we started trying to find a nanny. She doesn't have memories of her mother, but I think because of how the rest of us were dealing with the loss, that it affected her negatively, and she started having a lot of issues. But maybe she would have had those issues anyway, it's hard to say. I'm pretty sure she's the smartest one in the family, and I know people with high IQs can have quirks and social difficulties. Fran thinks Grace is a genius. So we're just trying to make sure she has help when she needs it. And Fran has helped tremendously, by helping her learn to just be a kid sometimes. To not be so serious, and even to be goofy and silly. I've seen them with her dolls, when they're playing with the dolls and making elaborate stories. I know Gracie loves that. She adores Fran, she wants to be like her. Fran really is like a mother to her. To all the children. I'm really grateful to her for that." They all got quiet, and the therapist jotted down a few more notes.

"Well, would the two of you mind if I split you up for just a little while? So we can have a one on one chat for a bit, then we'll come back together to see what else we may need to go through?"

"Oh, uh, sure. I guess that's fine," Fran said. "Who do you want to-"

"Max- if I might. And Fran, if you need to grab a drink, and could you wait in the other room until I switch you two out? There's a nice view out those windows, too, and tons of magazines you can look through, if you want. It shouldn't take too long."

"Okay, sure. Let me just grab a drink. Max, do you want one?" Fran asked, getting up from the couch.

"Oh, thank you, water would be good. Thank you, Fran," he let go of her as she headed to the mini fridge, grabbed a fruit juice and a bottle of water, and then walked back to Max to give him the water. She squeezed his shoulder.

"I'll be right out there, okay?" He smiled up at her and patted her hand on his shoulder.

"Alright, I'll come get you when it's time to switch."

"Okay, sweetie," she leaned down and kissed him quickly and then headed through the door to the waiting room to wait her turn.

Once Fran was out, the therapist turned to Max.

"Okay, Max. I wanted to talk to you privately first, because I can only imagine what you are probably going through right now. Having been through a similar situation before, and one that didn't have a good outcome. And now, you allow yourself to fall for someone, and it's deja vu. Can you talk a little bit about that? About how the conversation went when you found out what was happening with Fran?"

Max went a little pale and settled back on the couch, then took a sip of his water before he began.

"Well, I got the call from Val to come get her. I guess Fran wouldn't even talk to Val. That scared me. But if Fran was willing to come back home with me, I was going to stay with her as long as she wanted me there. Whatever it took. I was getting scared. My stomach was in knots. And when I got there, Val brought Fran down to me. Fran just looked- crushed. Not well at all. She's always so resilient and strong, you know? She's the one who lifts everyone else up. Even if she has a rough patch, and maybe needs a hug, she can turn right back around and be fine. But she wasn't fine. That much was obvious. But she was willing to come home with me instead of staying at her mother's, or talking to Val. So I knew something was up. All sorts of things went through my mind. Horrible things. So I got her in the car and we headed back. She couldn't look at me, she looked like she was holding back tears. But she held my hand. That meant a lot.

"We got home, got our coats off. I just wanted to hug her, you know? It really hurt to see her that way- so defeated. And tired. I just wanted to be there for her, however she needed me to. So we went upstairs and got ready for bed, and we went to my room. I figured we could just hang out together, watch TV maybe if she couldn't talk yet. She had a hard time talking at first, so I asked if maybe there was a way she could show me, or write it down or something. She went to her bedroom and got the papers from the hospital, it had the lab reports, and the report from the ultrasound. And so she started explaining them to me- told me what she had been experiencing. And that she had gone to the emergency room alone. That really- that upset me. I guess I understand why she did it, she kind of thought maybe it would be nothing, she didn't want to bother anyone with it. But they had to put her on fluids at the hospital. She was admitted until her fever came down, until she wasn't dehydrated. And when the doctor came to talk to her about what they found- I hate thinking about that. She was all alone, and had to carry that. And try to keep it from everyone because she didn't know how to talk about it. And all the times she wasn't well, all the fevers, trying to get sleep. She would hurry out of the house and try not to run into anyone, and would go to her parents place and try to take a nap in her old bedroom. Part of me understands why she didn't want to tell us- because she knew it would hurt us, and scare us. But she didn't even tell Val. If she had told Val or her mother, I know they would have called me right away, I know they would. But the doctor had told her to bring someone with her for the followup appointment- the one we went to on Monday. She said she knew then that she was going to have to talk about it, so she could find someone to come with her. That caused her a lot of stress and upset, trying to figure out how to do it. So I'm glad I called Val, and we got things moving in the right direction. If Fran and I hadn't talked that night, I don't know what would have happened." Max got quiet, and the therapist let him process things. "She was scared to tell me because she knew it would hurt. I know she's scared that it might be cancer. So am I. The children are upset, too, because it's not fair. And of course I feel guilty that I pushed her away so much before. If I hadn't, then maybe we would have been together already, and maybe we would have dealt with it together, so she wouldn't have had to suffer alone. You know? We've talked about all that. She doesn't want me to feel guilty, and I don't want her feeling that way either. So we told each other that from now on we all talk about things, no more hiding or trying to protect anyone. We deal with it in the open."

"Well, I think that's a very good start. And a very good way to set an example for your children. Now, I'd like to talk about something else. You had mentioned that when your wife passed, that maybe you didn't get the closure you needed, so you could have another relationship without feeling that guilt that you might somehow be betraying your wife." Max's eyes lowered.

"I know that's probably normal, I'm not the only one who went through something like that. But it was like I used it as a shield to keep people away. I kept my wedding ring on. Fran said it was because I just wasn't ready. Maybe I wasn't. But I also know I didn't want to be a part of that dating scene, going out with whoever, whenever. I'm not really that kind of guy. I had a marriage, a family, that I was really proud of. It was supposed to stay that way. The rest of our lives. Things were going just fine. Then Sarah got sick. That's her name- Sarah. It happened fast. And it was something neither of us could control. They had her on chemo fairly quickly, and that made her more sick. She couldn't do anything. It wasn't like we had a chance to come to terms with her losing her life. We just kept trying to fight, and then we saw it wasn't helping. There was nothing left that they could do. I was angry. I guess I felt like we were robbed of whatever was left that she had to give, you know? That maybe if she didn't go on chemo, she wouldn't have been as sick, and maybe we would have gotten more time with her, better time. Maybe we could have made peace with it- with what was about to happen. I don't know. I can think about it logically, like of course we wanted to fight it with everything we could- she had children. She had me. She should have been able to fight with everything she had. And maybe she did, but in the end, it wasn't enough. It just went too fast. How do you get ready for something like that? She was there, then she was gone. It took a long time to face the world again. I was useless. Eventually, when I could get myself out of bed, I realized that work was the only thing that it seemed like I could focus on. It was tangible, I could focus on the financial side, or reading scripts, or hiring people. So that's what I did. I built my business back up until it was profitable again. But I neglected my children. That was wrong, and I regretted that. And none of the nannies mentioned that when they worked there, that maybe the children would be better if I spent more time with them. No one mentioned it, until Fran. That was the first thing she worked on with us. She wasn't about to be a servant, it was like she knew she had to be a partner with me, a partner in raising the children. And that's exactly what happened. You know, in a way I'm glad I kept my wedding ring on, because it probably did fend away some women. But when I started realizing I had feelings for Fran- I kind of wish I had taken it off then. Maybe that would have helped me open up to her, so she could feel like it was okay to come to me when she wasn't feeling well."

"Does Fran hold a grudge against you for not opening up?"

"I don't know. Probably not now, since we're together. I know it frustrated her in the past. I know it hurt her. I'm sure I made her feel like she wasn't good enough for me. But I think she understands, if I really wasn't ready. If I was still scared. I just- I should have gone to counseling because of it, but I chose not to and let it just drag on. And then it takes another big scare like this to make me grab onto her for dear life. I can't lose her. I can't. The children can't. She's my best friend and I love her, I'm crazy about her. I've missed too much time with her, and I don't want to miss another second."

The therapist let him settle himself down a bit and drink some more water. She could tell how much he loved Fran. There was no hiding it.

"Max, I want to talk about closure for a minute. There are a number of ways that can help people gain that sense- that helps them feel like it's okay to move on, and that it doesn't involve forgetting about the lost loved one, or disrespecting them in any way. Can I ask you something?"

"Uh, sure."

"When your wife passed, how were things handled? I mean, was there a burial, or cremation?"

"Burial." She jotted down some notes.

"Okay. Did the children attend the funeral?"

"Not my youngest. Brighton and Maggie were at the funeral, but I didn't want them at the graveside. I was worried that would be too traumatic."

"Probably a good idea. How old was your youngest at the time?"

"She was only two, she didn't know what was going on."

"Did your wife get to have time with the children before she passed?"

"Every day. I made sure of it. She was in a hospice care facility. I had wanted her to be at home, but she was afraid that if she died there, it would leave bad memories for us. For me. She didn't want that to happen. So Niles would bring them over every day after school, and often we'd have dinner together there, if she was feeling up to it."

"Well, that sounds very thoughtful. I'm sure she enjoyed that." Max nodded. "Can I ask you something else?"

"Sure."

"Have you visited her grave since the funeral?" Max looked at the floor and shook his head.

"No."

"So I would presume the children haven't either?"

"No."

She let that sink in with him, that maybe that one act was something he might consider. He didn't know what to say, and she wasn't saying anything to him. The silence was making him squirm. He took another sip of water.

"Would you?" She asked. Max thought some more.

"I don't know. Maybe. It just- I just- it's hard to think about. That last time I was there, I didn't handle it well. I kind of went on a downward spiral. I don't really remember much after that, the next few days at least. I drank a lot. Slept a lot. Or tried to sleep. Avoided everything. It seemed easier to stay away from that cemetery. I didn't want to bring back all of that pain. Her parents took care of having the headstone made and installed. Maybe that was part of it, that if I went there and saw it- saw it written in stone, then that would be it. I'd have to acknowledge it."

The therapist nodded thoughtfully. "It's possible it could stir up emotions. But do you think the children have a right to go visit their mother's grave, if they wanted to?"

"Sure, I suppose so. But that would worry me, too. That it would be too much for them. Especially Gracie. But maybe it would be too abstract for her, if she doesn't have memories of her mother. Maybe it would be harder for the older children."

"Have you ever talked to them about it? Just to gauge if that's something they ever thought about doing?"

"No, we never talk about that. I guess I just figured- maybe when they were adults, they could go if they wanted. But I guess I never thought I would go. I don't think I could decide if that seemed disrespectful to Sarah or not. I mean, I know she's not 'there' so it shouldn't matter so much, to have people visit your gravesite when you're gone. But why else have one, right? It is a memorial, after all. Maybe it should be acknowledged by the living. Do you think if I did that, that I might get a sense of closure?"

"I can't guarantee you would, but I think it could be a start. I get the sense that your grieving was stunted, for whatever reason. Maybe getting back to work, and burying yourself in your work, it gave you something else to focus on that didn't hurt so much. If you filled every minute of every day with something else, you wouldn't have time to let your mind try to process everything you had just been through. It was definitely a coping mechanism, and you probably really needed that at the time. Maybe your work saved you, or helped pull you back up and get you engaged with the world again. But by keeping that ring on and keeping your distance, it kept you out of harm's way a little longer. You weren't going to give your heart to just anyone. And now here you are, facing the potential of love and loss again. But you know what I think is pretty impressive?"

"What?" Max asked, confused.

"You didn't run away. When all the cards were laid out on the table, you stayed with her. And it sounds like you told her everything you needed to tell her. Hopes and fears. All of that. She knows she can rely on you, completely. And from what she said about what happened this morning- the talk you both had, she really needed to have that talk with you. And you let it happen. It seems like it did you both some good."

"Yes, it did. It really did. I mean, I guess I felt bad that she worried about bringing it up, she worried what I would say. But we talked, and it went well. And we both felt better. So we have to keep doing that, no matter what it is we need to talk about."

"Exactly. You were there for her. Let her be there for you."

"What do you mean? You mean- about Sarah's grave? I should talk to Fran about… about visiting Sarah's grave?"

"I'm saying- you love each other. You're best friends. You made a commitment to her. You both want to be able to talk to each other about everything. And she loves your children, too. She wants what's best for them, and to help them through the good and bad in life. If paying a visit to their mother's grave can help them, too, then it's worth considering, isn't it? Maybe Fran can be your rock to help you get through it. And once you're on the other side, after you visit the grave, you won't have to fear it anymore. Maybe that will be another huge weight off your shoulders."

"Maybe. But thinking about it makes my stomach do somersaults."

"Of course it does." They were quiet again as the therapist wrote her notes. Max twiddled his thumbs and looked at the floor. "One more thing before I let you swap places with Fran so I can talk to her for a little bit- I know you've had quite a lot happen in less than a week, and a lot of things can't be resolved until Fran has her surgery. Have you done any preparation for the future, for the two of you? Regardless of the results of the surgery?"

"You mean like plans for the future? We've talked a little bit about some things we want to do. And this morning in the paper there was an ad for a big bridal expo coming up in a couple of weeks. She got tickets for that, so now she has that to look forward to, and then planning the wedding. We've also talked a little about a vacation, when the children have their Spring Break. So we have thought a little about the near future. I think once we talk to the doctors on Friday about how the surgery will go, then we can make some plans for how to care for her when she is recovering. And once she has the surgery, we'll have more answers. Then we can really make plans."

"You mentioned the wedding, and the bridal expo, that Fran is really looking forward to that. Is that something you will be involved in?"

"Well, to a certain extent. I mean, I'd be fine with a small ceremony, but I know Fran wants a big wedding. She's wanted one her whole life, and I want to give that to her. It makes me happy thinking about how she'll be able to make all those choices, and plans. I know she'll ask my opinion. Maybe I'll go with her for a few things. But I thought that going to that expo with her mother and friends, or maybe with my oldest daughter if our butler Niles doesn't go, that it would really be fun for her. I'm sure I'll be smothering her once she comes home from the hospital, so she might enjoy a break from me."

"You don't think she'd want you to go to the expo with her? Or work on plans together?"

"Well, sure, to some extent. But you have to understand- fashion and design, that's her passion. She worked at a bridal shop before coming to us. She probably has multiple plans worked out already, and color schemes, and flowers, and food. Everything. I might just get in the way of their fun if I went with them to the expo. But of course if she wanted me to go, I absolutely would. I loved seeing how excited she was this morning when she saw the ad, and when she called in to buy the tickets. And then thinking about my son taking portraits of us this morning- we'll get to pick one out this afternoon to use for our engagement announcement. It should come out this Sunday. We're both really excited about that. But of course, she has to get the doctor's O.K. before she can go to the expo, and she has to use a wheelchair, I told her I don't want her walking all that time she's there. I'm sure she'll be feeling better by then, but it's a pretty major surgery to go through. I don't want her taking any chances and hurting herself."

"So it's not just about finding things to plan a wedding with, it's also a fun outing she can have, and have some good times with other people, which she may need by then if she's been cooped up indoors since the surgery."

"Yes, exactly. That will be a good experience to gauge how well and how fast she's recovering."

"Okay, I get it. Now, you're both thoroughly in this relationship, emotionally and physically close?"

"Well, yes."

"May I ask about your living arrangements?"

"Oh, um, well, we're sharing a room now. Sharing a bed. We don't want to be apart. And I worry about her, after last weekend and what happened, I couldn't handle it if she had been by herself then. Something bad could have happened. I don't want to think about what could have happened. So she's moving her things in to the master bedroom, little by little. I've made room for her things, and we aren't rushing it too fast, so we both can get used to the change. And we talked to the children about it, that she was staying with me now. Gracie said she was fine with it because we love each other, and Fran needs someone to watch out for her. So the children are fine with it. But of course, if anything comes up, I told them that we should talk about it."

"May I ask about intimacy? You've gotten pretty close pretty fast, has intimacy been a part of that?"

"Well, um, we haven't actually, you know, but we did talk about it. She worries that if we don't - if we haven't, you know, before the surgery, then it could be a long time before we're able to be together. And I admit I do have concerns about being physically intimate with her, right now- that if there's a chance it could harm her, that worries me. We talked to the doctor about it. He said it's fine if things are, uh, gentle, you know? We're trying not to rush there, but to just take some steps because we want to be close to each other. We're crazy about each other. It's possible we may, before surgery, but only if we both feel it's right."

"Are you concerned about when she comes home from the hospital? I mean, like, about intimacy later on?"

"Well, I'm not going to expect that, of course. Whatever the doctors say, we'll abide by. I'm not going to push that. But Fran and I talked, I mean- we're know we're crazy about each other. And we really love each other. We're in love, too, and it's like we've been holding back so long, you know? And we talked about how right after the surgery that intimacy wasn't going to be possible, and we don't know for how long. And I'm sure she was thinking about the what-ifs- if something happened during the surgery. You know? She didn't want to wait until after she recovered for us to be together. And I guess I don't either, but I wasn't going to let that happen unless the doctor said it was okay, and he said it was, and he talked about how things like this can be difficult for couples, how they may really feel the need to be intimate like that, to show each other how much they love each other, to have that closeness. And we do need that. I need her to know how much I love her, I need to show her. I guess I have been having anxiety when she's not with me. Like at the hospital when they had to take her away to have the MRI. That was hard. And I know being away from her when she has the surgery- I don't know how I'll get through that. I just hope they let me stay with her that night. She has to stay overnight at the hospital."

"It does sound like your communication is very good right now, and I recommend you keep up with that, even after the surgery. Make sure you remind yourself about that."

"I will. We will."

"Okay, then, why don't we swap you guys out now and I'll talk to Fran, then I'll talk with you both again to wrap up our session."

"Oh, okay, I'll go get her." Max got up from the couch and went to the door, opened it, and found Fran looking out the window at the city below. She turned and smiled at Max when she saw him.

"My turn?" She asked, walking towards him.

"Yes." He reached for her hands and gave her a few kisses.

"Okay, I'll see you in a little bit, baby," she whispered. She hugged him and kissed him again, and he watched her go through the door and shut it behind her. He was feeling anxious again.

Fran walked over to the couch and sat down, and the therapist flipped the page over on her notepad.

"Hello again, Fran. I was telling Max that I thought it would be good to have a brief conversation with you both alone, just to address things you are going through on your own, outside of the things you're going through together. I guess what I'll start with is how this whole health scare may be affecting you. I'm assuming you've never been through anything like this before, with either yourself or any close family or friends?"

"No, I haven't. I know it's not just affecting me, my parents are worried, and I know Max is scared. I think that's why I didn't talk to anyone right away. I had to be sure, first. That it wasn't nothing. And I was really surprised when the doctor came and told me what was going on. It was hard to take in, you know? I guess I was mostly scared to tell Max and my mother. I knew it would crush my mother, but she would probably try to take over and protect me, probably smother me. But with Max- I wasn't sure how he might react. I think I knew he still had some unresolved things going on in him, having to do with relationships. And with our history, I knew he had feelings for me. I was scared to tell him. I guess I worried he'd run away, or that it would just hurt him too much. I didn't want to put that burden on him. And the kids, too. I know I should have said something to someone, but I was kind of frozen. Maybe I could have gone to Val first, but I know she wouldn't have kept it a secret, and maybe that's why I didn't tell her. I was still trying to comprehend it myself. And all that was on top of not feeling well. The doctor gave me medication to help with the fevers, but there are times, like this morning, when I can get really bad fatigue, and sometimes I lose my appetite, my insides don't feel so good. I have to sort of watch what I eat, make sure everything keeps moving, you know? I have different pills to try to help with that."

"Oh, I see. I'm sorry that you're going through this, but I'm glad that you've finally been able to talk to everyone, and you see that you have a lot of support around you. That has to make you feel a sense of relief."

Fran smiled. "It does. But I feel bad, too. That I didn't talk to anyone."

"Is someone mad at you that you didn't tell them sooner?"

Fran thought about the question. "I don't think so. If they were mad, I think the worry outweighed that."

"What about Max? Do you think he was upset with you that you didn't tell him?"

"I think- I think maybe he thought that there were other reasons that I didn't tell him. That maybe I was mad at him, or I didn't trust him, not so much that I was trying to protect him."

"Mad at him?"

"Yeah. Well, a couple of months ago, before I started feeling any symptoms, it seemed like things were getting nice between us. We had a couple of those moments, and he gave me a really nice gift for Hanukah. I don't know, maybe it was the holiday spirit. He seemed more relaxed. We'd gone out to lunch with the kids on a Saturday, and it was one of those days where it was warmer than it usually is in December, so we walked back home. The kids were in front of us, having some kind of excited conversation. They weren't picking on each other or arguing like they can do. It was nice. And sometimes Max, he lets me hold on to his arm when we walk, you know- he's very much a gentleman. But this time, he took my hand, almost holding it, but he had like my two little fingers hooked in his little fingers. It was really sweet. It was different. We walked home like that. I don't think the kids noticed, but I wasn't paying attention to them. It felt like Max and I were having this secret communication with each other. We got home, and put our coats away, and the kids ran upstairs. It was just us in the living room. We were standing close to each other and we started talking- I don't even remember what about. I think we complimented each other, and then it was that spark again. You know, when you can't ignore that attraction. It felt like we were trying to hold back, but we didn't have a reason to. So we kissed each other. It was wonderful. Butterflies. And then we hugged each other, kissed some more. Then the damn phone rang. It was right next to us. It messed up everything. Niles wasn't home so he didn't answer it, the kids didn't answer it. So Max went and picked it up, and it turned out to be some kind of urgent thing for work. It ruined the moment. He said sorry, he had to go, and that was that. And he was gone the rest of the day, and I just kind of had to stew. I know I avoided him after that, or pretended like nothing happened. And he had to keep dealing with work, it wasn't just a one day problem. I think it made me feel like second fiddle. We never talked about it. It just kind of kept going like that, I'm sure I made him feel bad. Maybe he was afraid to talk about it with me, I don't know. But then I started having the symptoms, and all my focus went to that, and trying not to let anyone see that I wasn't feeling good. It just kept going like that, until the fever sent me to the ER. Then I really kept my distance."

"Okay, I'm getting a better picture now. It makes sense. But it sounds like you two have really turned the corner on all of that- he seems grateful that he was the first one you told, and now you're his priority. He may still be carrying some guilt over all of that, just like you carry some guilt over not telling anyone what was happening with you. But you've both made a commitment not just to each other, but to having better communication. A commitment to talking about anything and everything that may come up. And that's really good. I can see how much you two care about each other, how much you love each other. The best way to get over these lingering feelings of guilt would be to talk about it when that feeling comes up, and to show each other the love you feel. And it seems like he's really stepped up, he's shown you now that he needs you, and he won't let anything get in the way of your relationship."

"Yeah," Fran smiled. "He's been amazing. He's done so much. And he wants to be the one to take care of me, and that makes me feel good. It really helps with that trust. Not just me trusting him, but him trusting me. You know- him trusting me with his heart."

The therapist smiled and nodded. "You know, aside from the health stress you're going through, it really does look like your relationship is on pretty solid ground. Maybe just getting past this communication hump was all you needed to do. You've both been dancing around the biggest issues for so long, and now you aren't. Now is the time you needed each other most, and all those other things don't matter. Maybe it did take something like this to put it all into perspective."

"Yeah. Maybe. I just wish it hadn't. It's a pretty scary thing to have to deal with." They were quiet for a moment and the therapist wrote down a few notes while Fran grabbed a sip of her juice.

"Fran, I'd like to go a little further back with you, before you started working for Max. Did you have other relationships that had this pattern of communication problems?"

"Uh, like what me and Max kept doing? I don't think so. I mean, before I started working for him, I just got out of a long-term relationship. And not a good one. A pretty stupid one, actually. My ex, Danny, I'd been with him since high school. And I probably should have dumped him back in high school. He was a commitment-phobe. He was a cheater. But he was also my boss, and I lived with him. I guess I relied on him for money and shelter and all that, so I wouldn't have to go back to my parents. It wasn't the most- empowering situation- I guess you could say. He owned this bridal shop in Queens, and that's where me and Val worked, too. That day- I happened to bring up how we weren't engaged or something, and then he has something to tell me. And I'm thinking, oh, he's gonna propose! Finally! But he didn't. He says we should see other people, because he found some hussie he liked better. And not only do I have to move out, but he's firing me so he can give her my job. I should have expected something that stupid from him, and got out before it happened. But in case you haven't figured out, I act like I have a lot of self esteem, but I really don't. Where I come from, in Queens, girls are taught to find a husband, and maybe a job, too. Make some extra money to get ready to have kids. And then that's pretty much it. My mother molded my father, he relies on her for everything, except for work. They were a match, there's no way they could be with anybody but each other. Maybe I thought I could fix Danny. That maybe in time he'd grow up. But he didn't. So there I was, no boyfriend, no job, no place to live. It was humiliating. I had to go back to my parents. So I tried to vow to myself that I'd never be dependent on a guy like that again.

"The only work I could find right away was a door to door sales job, selling cosmetics. Most of the girls that did that stuck to their own neighborhoods, and I guess didn't stay long because it wasn't a great job. But I said- to hell with my neighborhood, nobody's got any money there. I was going to aim for the top, and if that didn't work out, then there was plenty underneath to tackle. So I thought, where's the top? So I went to Park Avenue. I had only hit a few houses, and couldn't even get past a 'Hello, my name is Fran,' and the door would be shut in my face. But then I get to the Sheffield house, and Niles ushered me right in. He had mistaken me for an applicant for the nanny job. And somehow, I managed to talk my way to getting hired. Max was pretty desperate. Looking back on it, it didn't seem like a coincidence. You know? How those things happen that at first just seems like a weird series of events, but then if one little thing was changed, everything else would have fallen apart and it wouldn't have happened. So I know I was supposed to go there, to meet all of them. And this thing with Max, it couldn't happen right away. I know that. We both had a lot to learn. And I can be a bit impulsive. I had to learn to tone that down, and he had to learn to take chances, to be spontaneous. And to ease up a little, you know, with his control issues. I had a lot to learn about that lifestyle, too. And he had to learn how I was brought up- no money, but a very loving family. He had money, but didn't have the loving family. If he didn't have a nanny that loved him and raised him, I'd hate to think of how he would have turned out. Sometimes I can still see that scared little boy in him, and it makes me want to take care of him and comfort him. I see that little boy now. I just want to help him feel strong again, you know?"

"Yes, very much, and that's a good quality to have. But for him to have that vulnerability with you- that's actually a good thing. It means he can open up to you, that he wants to be open with you. He trusts that you won't harm that little boy. And honestly, it sounds like that boy has had a pretty big crush on you, for quite a while. I expect that you both did have a lot to learn, about each other, and about yourselves. You needed a partner who would be loyal and faithful to you, and he needed a partner that he could be loyal and faithful to. He needed the time to allow himself to move on. You needed the time to make sure you didn't make the same relationship mistake again. And I think you both have gotten there. Neither of you need to live in the past anymore, you have a present and a future to work on."

Fran smiled and got a little teary-eyed. "I'm very lucky to have him and the children in my life. And Niles, too." She took another gulp of juice.

"Now, Fran, I think your relationship with Max is on solid ground, but this health situation- do you mind talking about that for a moment?"

"Sure, yeah. I mean, it's the one negative thing that's going on, and it affects more than just me."

"Yes, it does. But my concern is how it's affecting you. You haven't been through anything like this before. Have you ever been in the hospital before? Had surgery?"

"Uh, yeah, just once, for my tonsils. A couple years ago. They were all there for me then, too. I was a little scared, but mostly over being put under, not so much them removing my tonsils. But now, it's a very different kind of procedure. They have to be really careful, so they don't puncture the tumor, or even my intestines. It's something that's completely out of our hands. I'll be nervous and scared going into it, but I can't imagine what everyone else will be going through while I'm in the operating room. I won't be able to comfort anyone then. That makes me sad."

"That's understandable. You can't control that part, but is there something you can do before the surgery? Or even afterwards, within reason, of course."

"Well, I can spend time with them, I suppose. Talk to them. Tell them I love them."

"And that's probably all they'd ask for. A little time, and some understanding. That's something everyone wants. And afterwards, it might be difficult for you to give much, but even a minute or two can help. Just a chance for people to lay eyes on you and say hello. And if you aren't feeling great at the moment, don't be afraid to say so. That's part of the communication thing. And Max might need to let others help, too. Not because he doesn't need to be doing everything, but because they all are going to want to feel useful somehow. If he's going to be the one you want near you the most, then let everyone else take care of other things. If you need something to read, or want to watch a movie. And when you are feeling up to having different company, try to get Max to take a break, even just to go for a walk, or to go get a movie for you. He will very likely have some separation anxiety to deal with, so watch for that. He may need reassurances now and then."

Fran let out a chuckle. "Yeah, he does need reassurances. I think he questions himself a lot, like he isn't completely sure what he says or does is the right thing to be saying or doing. He was raised in such a bubble that I think it was partly freeing for him to move here, and partly terrifying. But I think it was really good for him to learn how to navigate everything with different kinds of people. When he's confident, he doesn't question himself, but like this situation, when he gets scared, or if he thinks he hurt someone, it just crushes him. I don't like seeing him like that. It makes me want to just hold him and tell him it'll be okay."

"Well, get ready to do that at least a few times."

Fran smiled. The therapist jotted some more notes. "Okay, Fran. One last question before I have you bring him back in."

"Okay."

"What are you scared of? Right now?"

Fran looked startled, then went a little pale as she thought over the question. She took a deep breath and exhaled. "I'm scared of… of the surgery." She got quiet again.

"Anything specific about it, or just in general?"

"Everything about it. Being under anesthesia. Having a tube down my throat to breathe, and if that could damage my throat. The scars I'll have, if they'll heal. And then if something happens during surgery. And if the answers we finally get- if they aren't good answers. But mostly, I think it's thinking about going into surgery, and going under. I'm scared about that, and I think I'm afraid to show that to Max."

"That's understandable. Have you told him this?"

"Not in so many words. I think we're both scared about Monday. We go to the doctor on Friday to talk about the surgery, but I don't know if they can tell us anything that will make us feel better."

"I see. Do you trust the doctors?"

"I guess so. I mean, I don't really know them. But the oncologist has been very helpful, making sure to talk to us very directly. He's very matter-of-fact. And today they're supposed to be meeting with the surgical board to go over the surgery and make sure every possibility has been thought through. That part makes me feel better."

"Oh, good! That's a start. And Friday, you can ask about the scars you may have. Maybe they have some pictures they can show you of another patient, so you have an idea of what to expect, make it a little more tangible. And since you've had surgery before- you've been under anesthesia and didn't have any issues coming out of it, did you?"

"No, everything went fine."

"Okay, that's something. And you can ask them about the tube- if you'll be intubated and what that will be like, if there are risks, or what to expect afterwards. And if you feel any concern for anything, if you feel you don't have enough information, be sure to say something. That's what the meeting is for, to go through everything and minimize your concerns, and Max's. Will there be anyone else going with you?"

"Yes, my parents, and Brighton. He wants to know more, and he's been doing some research for us. If it turns out to be cancer, then he'll research the type and find out more for us, so we can make more informed decisions. And my friend Val, she wasn't sure she'd be able to get time off from work to come. She wants to be there on Monday during the surgery, so it will probably just be the five of us."

"Okay. Well, it sounds like that meeting on Friday might be of some help. Bring whatever you need with you- any questions you and Max, and even the children, may have. It sounds like you'll be about as prepared as you can be."

"I hope so."

"Well, you ready to go get him?" The therapist asked. Fran's eyes lit up and she jumped up from the couch.

"Yes!" She hurried to the door, opened it, and ran through to find Max sitting in a chair by the window, flipping through a magazine. He grinned when he saw her come through the door, and jumped up from the chair and held his arms out to her. They hugged each other and kissed, and Fran took his hand to lead him back into the office. He set the magazine on the table as he let her lead him back in. Max shut the door behind him, and they went back to the couch and sat down.

"Okay, kids! I understand why you wanted to get in so quickly. You do have a lot on your plates right now, and have gone through a lot of changes in the last week. I will say, as far as your relationship goes, that I am encouraged by how much work you both have already done, and how aware you are that you need to work on your communication. Being more open with each other, being honest about your feelings, that's exactly what you both need from each other. So no more dancing around the issues, hiding your feelings, any of that. Start building that confidence that you can tell each other how much you care for each other, how much you love each other. And show it to each other, all the time. Get used to that, especially in front of other people who may not be used to seeing it. It could feel weird or awkward at first, but I have a feeling it won't. It sounds like everyone important to you both is completely supportive of your relationship. And might I add, congratulations on your engagement!"

"Thank you!" Fran said, squeezing Max's hand and smiling over at him.

"Yes, thank you very much!" Max said. He switched hands with Fran so he could put his arm around her.

"Now for the other important matter you two are dealing with- I am sorry that you're going through this. Max, I was telling Fran that it might be good to be as prepared as you can be for the meeting with the doctor on Friday. Make sure you go in with every possible question you can think of. Fran has some that she needs to ask." Max looked over at Fran and clutched her a little tighter.

"Alright."

"I also think it would be good for the two of you to try to treat this time like a mini vacation. You'll be dealing with a lot of tension and stress leading up to the surgery, and while Fran is in the hospital, so spend time every day trying to relax. Do some stretching, meditate, have some real quiet time together, without any plans or distractions, or the TV on, or even a radio. Give yourselves a chance to hear your own thoughts, so in case anything you have concerns about pops into your mind, write it down, and talk about it. Okay?"

"Okay. We can do that." Fran looked at Max and he gave her a smile.

"And Max, when Fran comes home from the hospital, let other people help. You don't have to do everything for Fran, and you shouldn't feel like you have to do everything. And by letting other people help, it will make them feel better, too. A lot of people close to Fran may be feeling helpless, so anything they may be able to do to help can go a long way to making them feel useful, too. Can you remember to do that?"

"Yes. I'll try to do that. I can't promise it will be easy, I know I might be a little greedy when it comes to her. But I understand. I know everyone will want to visit with her, so we'll have to figure out how to handle that. I want her to be able to see everyone, but not if it exhausts her. But we'll figure something out."

"And make sure you get some sleep, too, Max. And Fran, too. Even if it's during the day. Whenever you can get it, until you're feeling better."

"Yes, definitely. I'll follow whatever the doctors want. I want to recover quickly, I don't want to do anything stupid and mess that up."

"Good, good. Now I would like another followup next week. I understand that it may be difficult for you, Fran, especially since we don't know exactly what to expect. But Max- I would like to put you on the books for a phone call a week from today, in the afternoon. Do you think you can do that? That way if anything new comes up, we can discuss it then."

"Yes, I can do that. Would I just call you, or you call us?"

"I'll let you call here, let's say at one in the afternoon, next wednesday. Here, let me go put that in the computer and I'll give you a card with the info." She got up and walked over to the other side of her desk, set down her notepad, and began typing on the computer. Then she grabbed a business card and wrote down the appointment information, came back around the desk, and handed it to Max. "Okay, you two, I'll let you get out of here, unless you have any questions for me. Just remember to make it a habit of writing things down, and setting aside time to talk about things, especially when things are getting chaotic."

"Okay, we'll do that," Fran said. Max and Fran got up from the couch and went to retrieve their coats. Max helped Fran on with her things, then put on his own. They shook hands with the therapist.

"Thank you so much for seeing us today. I think it really helped," Max said.

"Yes, it did," Fran agreed. "And I'll make sure Max calls you next week, and we can give you an update then."

"Yes, please do. I'm rooting for you, and it sounds like you are in good hands. Just make sure you stay on top of asking questions, and don't let yourselves feel like you're being coddled at all, or that information is being kept from you. Work on ways you can feel more empowered."

"Okay. We will. Thank you again!"

"Have a good rest of your day! And go celebrate that engagement!"

"Oh, good idea!" Fran said, tugging on Max's arm. They waved goodbye to the therapist and headed out of her office. They were all smiles as they headed for the elevators and Max pressed the button. He turned to Fran and they buttoned up each other's coats, then fixed their scarves and put on their gloves. They got into the empty elevator and Max put his arm over her shoulders.

"Well, that went well, I think," Max said.

"It did. Only mildly difficult, subject-wise. But I think that's because we had quite a bit of practice before we went in there."

"True. Did she ask you any really tough questions?"

"Well, she seemed to know what her target was, what things she was expecting me to say. But it was okay to talk with her. It wasn't like we had to go way back into our childhoods and give her our whole life story. Since it was kind of an emergency meeting, I think once we told her what had happened, she knew what to pull out of us to make sure we were dealing with everything."

"Yes, I got that feeling, too. About our anxieties, our fears. She was very direct."

"She was. But not rude. She asked me what I was scared of, right now." Max looked down at her, a little concerned.

"Wow, that was direct. Is that something we should talk about later?"

"Yeah, we can. But don't get yourself worked up over it, okay. That's why she mentioned asking questions on Friday, and writing down as much as we can. To try to feel empowered, and get all the answers we can." Max lifted her chin and kissed her lips.

"Okay. Do you want to go straight home, or see what shops are over here?"

"Shops! I'm feeling pretty good right now, and if we stay home tomorrow, then shopping now is good."

"You got it, darling! Shopping it is! But not too long, we've got photos to look at when we get home!"

"Oh, yea!" The elevator doors opened on the ground floor and they got out, headed through the lobby of the building, and out the doors to the street.