Thanks to everyone who's faved, followed and/or reviewed this story so far. You guys make all the hard work that goes into these chapters worthwhile. Anyway, Hazbin Hotel is owned by Amazon and Adventure Time is owned by Cartoon Network. Enjoy.

Chapter 4: Doug the Happy Axolotl

(Later that day)

For the first time in what felt like years, Charlie woke up feeling refreshed and reenergized. And why shouldn't she? There were no immediate threats to the Hotel, no personal crises with any of her friends or family, and her love life was all but perfect. True, there would definitely be problems down the road. The Exorcists would return someday and there would always be demons like the Vees trying to shut down the Hotel for whatever reason, but at least for today, everything was alright.

As her eyes slowly fluttered open, the Demon Princess turned over on her side so she could look at her lovely bedmate, only to find that she was alone.

'Huh, that's weird.' She thought confusedly. 'Vaggie must've gotten up early and let me sleep in. That's so like her.'

With that minor mystery solved, Charlie just shrugged, sat up and reached over to turn on the lamp on her nightstand. However, no matter how many times she twisted that little black knob the light wouldn't come on.

'What the hell?'

The Demon Princess took a closer look at the nightstand and realized that not only was the lamp not working, but neither was the alarm clock.

'Power must be out. Oh well.'

Never one to let minor inconveniences ruin her day, Charlie climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom so she could brush her teeth, only the faucet wasn't working either.

'No water? No power? No Vaggie? What's going on here?' she thought as her brain went to work unraveling this strange mystery.

Then she remembered that something like this had happened before. It had been about three years ago, not long after Vaggie had moved in with her. An entire section of the Pride Ring had lost water and power due to an explosion in one of the sewer tunnels, and it had taken the city over two and a half weeks to get it fixed.

Yeah, that must be it. She bet something like that happened last night while she was asleep. She bet that someone in the Hotel had heard the explosion and woken Vaggie, and Vaggie, being the first-rate sweetie pie that she is, probably insisted on letting her sleep in. She bet that if she looked out her bedroom window, she'd see an entire section of Pentagram City blacked out.

And a few seconds later, that's exactly what she did. Only when she pulled back the curtains, Charlie didn't see an entire section of Pentagram City blacked out. In fact, she didn't see Pentagram City at all. Instead, she saw a vast wasteland of greyish brown mud shrouded in a sea of fog. She blinked a few times to make sure she wasn't seeing things, and then she pinched her arm as hard as she could to make sure she wasn't dreaming. But no matter what she did the view never changed.

Whatever this was, it was real.

Needing to investigate this strangeness further, Charlie opened the window and instantly realized that something was off. The air smelled foul, but not the familiar foulness of Hell she'd grown up with. Instead of sulfur, exhaust fumes and garbage, the air smelt of dampness and rotting vegetation. Then she noticed a lite rain hitting her face, only it didn't burn her skin. It wasn't acid rain, it was… rain-rain.

'But that's impossible.' She thought bewilderedly.

Then the Demon Princess looked up, and although the sky was largely obscured by grey clouds, she could see a few stray beams of light peeking through.

Sunlight.

Real sunlight.

This wasn't Hell.

She didn't know how or why, but somehow, they'd escaped.

Somehow, they'd come to Earth.

XXX

(A short time later)

After giving herself a minute to let the gravity of her situation sink in, Charlie raced downstairs like a kid on Christmas Morning in the hopes of finding someone who knew what the heck was going on. Fortunately, she didn't have to look too hard, for all of her housemates, minus a certain radio themed Overlord, were apparently having a slumber party in the lobby.

It was a most unusual scene, even by the Demon Princess' standards. Everyone was fast asleep, either on a couch or in an armchair, still wearing the clothes they'd gone to bed in the previous night. Cherri and Niffty were sharing a spot on the loveseat, the former cuddling with the latter like she was a doll. Charlie might've found the whole thing rather cute, if she hadn't also noticed the giant hole in the ceiling or the scorch marks on the floor.

Something went down last night.

"Everybody, wake up!" Charlie shouted; her emotions too flared up to care about manners.

"Huh?"

"Whuh?"

"Whozzat?"

"Daddy?"

Four of the five of them shot up like Pop Tarts, save for Niffty, who remained limp and unconscious in Cherri's arms.

"Oh, Charlie, you're up." Vaggie said in a hollow attempt to act like nothing was wrong.

"Yeah, I'm up." The Demon Princess replied frantically. "I'm up, the Hotel's wrecked, we're in a swamp and you all look like Hell. Now what in God's name is going on here?"

"Charie… Ugh… Hon, just calm down and I'll explain everything." The Fallen Angel said, loudly wincing as she forced herself to stand up.

"Vaggie, are you okay?" Charie asked as her panic gave way to concern.

"Yeah, I'm Ugh fine."

"You're lying."

"It's nothing."

"Show me your chest."

"Hon, I really don't…"

"Do it!"

With a defeated sigh, Vaggie obeyed her girlfriend and lifted up her nightgown so she could see her bare skin. And what she saw made her gasp in horror. A single, massive bruise covered every inch of skin between her breasts and naval.

"Oh my God…" Charlie squeaked out as she began to tear up.

"I swear, it looks worse than it is."

"Who did this to you?"

"We're not sure." Husk interjected bluntly. "Some guy broke in last night and tried to hurt Niffty. He worked us over pretty good before your dad chased him out."

"Whataya mean us?" Angel asked the Bartender brusquely. "I didn't see you jumpin' to my rescue when that freak had me on the ceiling."

"Hey, ease up, mate." Cherri spoke up. "We were all lookin' for ya. Vaggie just got there first."

"Alright, alright, I'm sorry." The Spider Demon said weakly. "Sigh… Long fuckin' night."

"Wait, wait, wait, back up!" Charlie rejoined the conversation. "Who broke in last night?"

"We don't know." Vaggie answered as she carefully sat herself and her lover down in the nearest chair. "He never told me his name, but he wasn't like any demon I've ever seen before. We fought for like two hours and he didn't get tired, and my spear broke when I tried to stab him. If I had to guess, I'd say he's at least as strong as one of the Sins, maybe stronger."

"Good God." The Demon Princess muttered in disbelief. "But why would someone like that go after Niffty?"

"Maybe it's a revenge thing?" Angel suggested. "I mean, Niff's the one who offed Adam. Maybe Heaven hired this guy to take her out?"

"No, I don't think so." Vaggie replied skeptically. "Angels don't hire demons to do their dirty work. That's the whole point of the Exorcists."

"You sure about that, Kid?" Husk asked frankly. "I mean, no offense, but you've been outta the loop with Heaven for a while now. Who knows how much has changed up there since you've been gone?"

"Maybe, but something still doesn't add up." The Fallen Angel responded. "If someone in Heaven had hired this guy, they would've sent him after all of us, not just Niffty. But he only wanted Angel out of the way, and he only fought with me because I attacked him first. No, there's something else going on here. Something weird."

"Well, did anyone try asking Niffty?" Charlie asked, trying not to sound condescending. "I mean, maybe she heard something that you guys didn't."

"Maybe, but there's not much point in asking." Cherri replied matter-of-factly. "She's been out cold since I found her smoking in a closet."

"Wait, you're saying cigarettes made her pass out?" the Demon Princess asked confusedly.

"No, I mean her head was smoking, like she'd just been on fire." The Aussie clarified, making Charlie wince. "I don't know what happened to her, but it's like her brain shut off."

To demonstrate her point, Cherri Bomb gave Niffty a few quick knocks to the head, and the little maid didn't even twitch.

"See what I mean?"

"Niffty? Are you in there, sweetie?" Charlie asked concernedly, before leaning over to poke her in the cheek.

Suddenly, Niffty's limbs began to flail about wildly and she started muttering in her sleep.

"Mazza… Mansa Musa de Fa-Fa!" she babbled incoherently. "Ima Hungee Squirrel!"

Then her body went limp again and she fell silent.

"O…kay…" the Demon Princess said, not really knowing how to respond to such a display. "Let's just… let her sleep for now and try to figure something else out. Like where we are and how we got here."

"Well, that's definitely the Sun out there, what little we can see of it, so we must be on Earth." Husk surmised, matching Charlie's own theory. "As for how, well, safe money's on Lucifer."

"My Dad? But why?"

"Who else has the mojo to pull this off?" Angel said bluntly. "Besides, it happened right after he chased that creep out. After he watched him piledrive your girlfriend through five floors. He probably did it to keep that freak away from you."

"I hate to say it, but Angel's probably right." Vaggie interjected. "Whoever that guy was, he was dangerous. I would've done the same thing in his position."

"Yeah, I guess that makes sense." Charlie replied, still feeling that there was something off about this whole situation. Then she noticed another member of her 'family' was missing. "Wait, where's Alastor?"

"We don't know." Her girlfriend answered plainly. "We looked around, but I think he was outside when Lucifer sent us away."

"Oh God…" the Demon Princess muttered under her breath as she tried to think of what she was supposed to do next.

When suddenly…

Rumble.

The whole room began to shake, as if something very large and very heavy had just struck the Hotel. It only lasted about a minute, but it was enough to put everyone on edge.

"Oh great, now what?" Angel asked with equal parts fear and annoyance.

"I'll go check it out." Vaggie volunteered, only to stop and wince when she tried to stand up.

"No, I'll go check it out." Charlie said, using her 'in-charge voice', as she stood up without issue.

"Hon, I don't think…"

"Excuse me." The Demon Princess interrupted. "But the last time I checked this was my Hotel. You all did your parts and I'm very proud of you, but now it's time for the Boss to step up."

And with that said, she stood up and walked confidently to the front door to see what all the hubbub was about. However, that confidence faltered a little when she stepped outside and remembered she was still in her pajamas, and thus not wearing shoes.

Muddy hooves are no picnic.

"Ugh! Gross!" she said as her cloven feet sank into the damp earth, but for the good of her Hotel, she forced herself to push through it.

Charlie looked around the foggy marshland and at first saw nothing that would explain the mysterious shaking from before. Then she turned around and her heart nearly leapt out of her chest.

Standing at approximately half the height of the Hotel was a creature unlike any the Demon Princess had ever seen before. It looked sort of like one of those weird newt things that people on the internet think are cool, Axo-somethings, only its skin was dark purple and black, and it was standing on its hindlegs. Even more astounding than that, it was dressed in a dark blue and orange tracksuit with matching sweatbands. Thus far, the creature hadn't noticed her, for it was too busy trying to tie its sneakers, which is why it was leaning against the side of the Hotel for balance.

"Um… H-H-Hello!" Charlie called out to the massive creature after finally finding her voice. "Excuse me, Sir!"

This seemed to get the mega-newt's attention. It looked around confusedly for a few moments before finally noticing the much smaller princess.

"Oh, hello there, dear." He said in a pleasant voice that really didn't match his appearance. "Can I help you?"

"Y-Yes, uh… I don't know if you've noticed this or not, but you're kinda leaning up against my Hotel and the shaking is scaring my friends."

"Oh, I'm sorry." the giant monster replied, sounding genuinely apologetic, which was a welcome change of pace. "I was just on my daily fog walk and I thought this looked like a good spot to tie my shoe. Didn't realize this heap was still in service."

"Well, it is." Charlie responded, choosing to overlook the 'heap' remark. "So, could you please be a little more careful from now on?"

"Sure, no problem." The mega-newt said politely as he finished tying his shoe and stood back up. "I'm Doug by the way."

"Charlie. It was nice to meet you."

"Same. Well, gotta get back to my walk. See you around, dearie." Doug said jovially, before powerwalking off into the fog, singing a silly nonsense song as he left.

A-Chooba-Chabba-Cheeba~

Chooba~

Chabba~

Cheeba~

A-Chooba-Chabba-Cheeba~

And then he vanished into the mist.

Despite how calm and collected she might've appeared during that little exchange, inside the Demon Princess was freaking out. Nothing about this situation made any sense and her already beleaguered brain was struggling to come up with a rational explanation. When none came to mind, she did the only thing she could do. She took a deep breath and then walked back into the Hotel without saying another word.

"Charlie!" Vaggie called to her as she rejoined her friends in the lobby. "Are you okay? What happened out there? What did you see?"

Charlie chose not to answer.

Instead, she just walked over, sat right beside her girlfriend, and with a blank expression on her face, she said the only thing she could bring herself to.

"Yeah… We're definitely not on Earth."

End Notes:

Next chapter is where things should start getting good.

Thanks again to everyone for reading and I'll see you in the next one.

Peace.