T/W Talk of drug use and sexual content.
There may not have been binding ropes and improvised gags last night but you did wake up feeling sore. The marks of last night's endeavor etched into your skin with every cut from his nails and every bitemark. You traced your fingers down the path of destruction he had left on your body, shivering at the thought of his hands exploring your body again as it once had. The way he would grip your chin, kiss your lips, and grab your hips, pulling you into him. His focus is entirely on your pleasure and yours alone.
You head into the bathroom, take a washcloth, and clean around the parts of broken skin. Then with a cotton ball, apply carbolic acid. You get dressed and make your way down for breakfast. Alastor was already at the breakfast table, George had plated him up some eggs on toast. You were still on half a grapefruit and black coffee. You had noted you had gone up a dress size since Alastor moved in. Perhaps the two of you sharing time in the kitchen, cooking with one another had been the cause. They do say when someone is in a happy relationship that they gain weight and as you think about it. You had become happy with Alastor. It had not been the life you had dreamed of but instead offered so much more than that. No love, but instead a true understanding of your needs. A freedom to be yourself and do as you please as long as it would not tarnish his name or reputation. He offered you devotion and care that you had never had before. He had few expectations of you but because of this fact, you always felt the need to go above and beyond what you normally would. Just to please him because you had grown to realize that you craved his praise.
"Our guest is awake, my dear." Alastor said, peering over the newspaper. "Is that a subtle hint at me going down there to subdue him again?" You inquired. "Well it's going to need doing and since you've more skill in such things. I figured it best that you did it. I would not wish to accidentally give him an overdose." You could feel the smile that grew on your face, stretching your cheeks. Alastor placed the morning paper down on the table and raised a brow to you. "What about that statement has you so cheery?" He asked, sounding as though he already knew the answer. "You said I was better at something!" You exclaim."Have I ever led you to believe otherwise?"
You thought about his question, he had never outright put you down, only opting to build you up at every opportunity given. "I guess not, I just always feel inferior in comparison, not something I'm all that acquainted with. You cook, you can dance, you play piano, you read so many books and seem to know so much on a variety of topics." You sighed out. "And yet since we've lived together, you've produced beautiful meals and even more beautiful music. But every skill you learn needs to be pursued with passion. For so many years you have been beaten into a box of what people expected of your title. Never truly allowed to become passionate about a topic, only now are you able to spread your wings and explore such things. I have noticed the medical field seems to be one of particular interest to you." He said, giving you a knowing wink and you knew he had found your books. However, the game was up, you no longer needed to hide such things from him.
"I suppose you make a valid point." You replied. "I usually do." He said wryly. "Alright, don't get too cocky in the morning. Did you know women are more prone to murder through poison? And you did just say how much you've been enjoying my cooking. It would be so easy to slip something into your meal since we rarely eat the same food." To your statement, Alastors expression drops. He rises from his seat and walks over to you. "And don't forget how much trust you put in me when I slip my hands around your throat." He now extends a hand and coils his fingers around your neck as if to put emphasis on his point.
"Well, I guess that is the beauty of this union is it not? Either one of us could kill the other in a heartbeat and not feel any sorrow. Yet we choose not to." At this Alastors grip tightens. "You think I would not miss you, that I would feel no sorrow?" He inquires but you are only able to nod, unable to vocalise anything. He releases you and now crouches down to be face to face with one another. "Oh, darling I would miss you terribly. I don't think I would find another partner that is even a fraction of the woman you are." He stands up once more, placing a tender kiss on your cheek, and grabs his jacket for work. You did not know what to say in response to that, no quip or retort to be had. "I do look forward to seeing what you make for dinner tonight although I will be suspicious if I taste almonds." His voice chimes out with a chuckle as he takes his leave for the morning.
You gathered your supplies, measuring out a slightly higher dose of morphine. John had been fighting in the basement, but the ropes still held him firm. You knew at some point you would need a more permanent solution to this, it would be unfortunate if his gag should slip out at any time. George was still unaware of what had transpired last night or even any of the other nights. Alastor was most likely correct in the fact he would have no reason to enter the cellar but should John manage to get his gag out then questions would be raised that you were not ready to answer just yet.
You had buried your unseemly urges for so long now but they were coming to the surface and despite the endless support and encouragement of your husband. There was a part of you that was still struggling to come to terms with the violent manner of your actions. Maybe if you'd had a healthier home life, and more understanding parents then you wouldn't have come unglued. If you hadn't been restricted and silenced then...A thought crossed your mind a beautifully twisted and dark little thought. You finished up in the cellar, taking a few notes for Alastor. He had not asked you but you figured he would appreciate it. You had once said if he indulged in your desires, you would indulge in his. This would be a little thank you for last night.
"Robert!" You chimed as you stepped into the quaint bookshop. "Lilian, you're back again. How is the training coming along?" Robert stood to attention as you walked in. "Oh, they're..." You fumbled for the words. "They're so much harder than I thought but I'm still keeping at it. It's actually why I am back." For everything you had done in recent months, you felt the most guilty for lying to him. "Oh of course dear, what do you need?" Robert inquired. "I am looking for more medical books, maybe something that has information about laryngectomy?" Robert did a double-take when you said that. "That's a big word, sounds surgical. Whatever would you need a book detailing such things like that for?" He had stopped looking through the piles of books at this point. "Well you know me, I have to be perfect. If I am not overqualified for this job then I'm not qualified at all."
Your answer seemed to be enough as he picked through a couple of shelves. "You know, I bet you're already more than good enough to be a nurse and you're just being too hard on yourself dear." Robert beamed out like a proud parent. You gave him a bashful smile as he continued to look, eventually pulling out one dusty, leather-bound book. "You know if Mary had a nurse like you I'm sure she would still...Well god rest her soul." He lamented. "Oh Robert, I am so sorry." You didn't know what to say to him. Mary had been a short and stout, little woman but for what she lacked in height she made up for in personality. She was the life of the party and the two of them had been smitten with one another for as long as you'd known them. You could not imagine the pain he must have been in at losing her. You thought about how torn apart you would feel if anything should happen to Alastor, how your world would come crashing down at your feet. That was nothing compared to the love he'd had for Mary and certainly did not compare to all the years they had spent together, the life they had shared, and the memories they had made.
Robert waved his hand as if to wave off your concerns. "She led a good life and the kids came to visit before she passed. I'm sure it won't be long till I kick the bucket." You could still hear the pain in his voice as he spoke of her but he was old fashioned, believing it was not a man's place to cry, even when grieving the loss of a loved one. "So what will you do with this place?" You asked, trying to change the topics. "Tell you what, I'll leave the books to you if you like?" He asked. "Oh, I simply couldn't. You've gotta save something for Daisy and Mike." He scoffed at your response. "I'll be leaving them the bricks and mortar but they're not interested in sitting behind a desk all day. Business is slow and it'll be more of a burden for them to clear it all out than it will be a profit and you've got a big house with a library. I'd like to think these books will go somewhere they'll be loved." His words pained you to hear but you graciously accepted his offer.
You had thought about going through with the procedure that day, having it as a surprise for when Alastor returned home. But if you were going to do this right, you would have to put in the same level of care into this as he put into his kills. You looked at your hands, shaking at the thought of what you were planning or maybe just too excited by it. You could not allow yourself to get too excited. Should you fail you could not imagine it would be easy to bring someone else back to the house to try again. This would be a delicate operation, more so than just cutting out the organs.
You spent that day in the cellar, swapping between keeping notes on John and reading your new book until 4 PM. Flipping through the pages and mimicking the motions you would need to make. Practicing over and over again until you were certain you could do it. You struggled to contain your excitement over dinner and Alastor commented on how giddy you seemed that night. You had brushed off his comment, just saying you had a treat in mind. He had tried to pry the secrets from your lips. Making his way across the dining room and proceeding to turn on the charm.
"My darling, I simply have to know what has you in such a joyous mood." He purred out. "My lips are sealed." You taunted but saw that devilish smirk spread across his face as though you had presented him with a challenge. "Is that so? Are you certain of that?" He took a hold of your chin and pressed his lips to yours, running his tongue along your lower lip. A signal that often meant for you to part them and without thinking, you did. "Hmm, they don't seem to be very sealed. And how about your legs are they remaining shut as well?" His hand now traced up your thigh and you felt your body flush. "I hope you're not hoping that silvery tongue of yours is going to work. It's a surprise, can't you just wait?" You insisted but your voice led into a whimper as you felt his fingers slide inside you.
"But a suprise is just like a secret and I thought we didn't have those between us?" His voice was low and velvety, whispering in your ear before his lips found your neck, gently suckling at the sensitive flesh as he continued to provoke you. You rocked your hips on his hand as he slowly pumped two fingers back and forth. "I promise you'll like it." You gasped out as he continued to stimulate you. Your fingers grab onto the arm of the chair. "I think I'd like to know now." He whispered, his free hand tugging at the neckline of your dress, exposing your breast to which his lips latched onto, nipping at the bud. His fingers, were deep and vigorous in their movements and you couldn't help but let out a moan, one he quickly silenced with a kiss. "Shhh darling, you wouldn't want George to walk in now?"
You nodded and leaned into him to deepen the kiss but as you did, he pulled back. His thumb now gliding over your clit as his hand picks up pace in its movements. "So you were going to tell me what this little secret is?" You could feel yourself on the verge of climax. "I know what you're trying to do and I'm sorry I'm just going to have to disappoint you tonight and insist you wait until tomorrow." You managed to breathe out between stifled moans. Just as you nearly reached your peak, waiting for the sensation of pleasure to overwhelm your body. He withdrew his hand. You let out an audible whine of dissatisfaction. "Well, it looks like we both will have to be disappointed tonight." He licked the slick from his fingers and made his way to his seat once more. "I..." You started and he stopped in his tracks. "Yes mon cherie?" He said, looking over his shoulder at you. "I'm still not going to tell you." You sighed, angry at your own stubbornness.
"Darling, I would love nothing more to throw you on this table, rip off that dress of yours, tie you up, and mark your body with my kisses. To spread your legs and fill your thoughts with nothing but my name. I would make you scream in such ways that even a gag could not silence you and then when you think I am done. When you are quivering at so much as my breath between your legs. I would slide inside you and proceed to take you gently, you would be so tender from just my touch and my tongue but I would ensure you savor every part of me as much as I would savor every part of you. No part of your body would feel neglected, your pleasure would be my priority and I would not stop until you tell me so."
Alastor had always spoken like a gentleman. Whilst he may not act like a gentleman in the bedroom you had never heard him speak so vividly about such things, the mental image his words painted in your head left you speechless. "So are we still keeping secrets?" He finally asked after moments of silence from yourself. You wanted to cave, you wanted him to take you in such a way but you were still strong in your resolve. "I will be keeping your surprise until tomorrow." You said through gritted teeth. "You are a vexing little thing at times." You could not tell if there was anger in his voice and his expression gave little away. "Well, I do have something for you."
You produced the sheet of paper from this morning, your notes on how John had responded to the morphine. "I've noticed I've had to use larger doses throughout the day, he seems to be building up a tolerance to such things. I have looked into it and perhaps something such as chloroform would work." Alastor took the paper, the doses you'd given, and the times they had managed to keep him unconscious for. "You have been busy." He noted, still reading through the information. "I also looked into cocaine. Administered through the eye, it can leave a person unable to feel, however, it would not render him unconscious. There is also nitrous oxide and ether but I feel chloroform would be the easiest to acquire." Alastor nodded. "I suppose you know where to find some?" You let out a chuckle. "I might just happen to know where to obtain some."