Chapter 18 [Physician's Chambers]
An elderly man shuffled about his sanctum. Tomes lined bookshelves along the walls. Lab apparatus, glass vessels and candles sat on a chipped oak table. Balinor reclined on a cot to his right. "Praise be! I cannot believe you are alive!" He examined the prone man's wounds. Despite Healing's efforts, Infection festered and burned at the gashed right side and leg. Sweat beaded on his forehead and soaked his hair. He confirmed Gawain's earlier suspicions. Wine and rose water attempted to clean the wounds.
Balinor set his jaw. Firm Resolve refused to waver. "Cen…red's raiders. Mmm! Gawain and Lancelot found me." A deep breath pushed from his mouth. Chill numbed his arms and legs. Effort became more and more necessary for him to move. "Master Wyngate, I…need to speak with the King and Prince Rodor."
"Rodor is now our King, Sir Balinor." Wyngate patted Balinor's hand. "He understands why you left. His gratitude and appreciation are well known. Sir Ywain will bring him and the Princess up here." Consideration determined the proper elixir. He shuffled over to the patient's side.
Balinor nodded. A terse grunt hissed through clenched teeth. Resignation knew the Cailleach lurked nearby. Necessity and Conscience dictated last words to his Prince…now King. Regret hung over his head. Lament wished for a last ride to the Essetir…and a certain village there….
…to Hunith…
Pained sigh deflated Balinor's lungs. He slumped back onto the cot. Memoria took him back. Diplomatic journey to Mercia's court ended sooner than expected. Leisurely return took him south. Unfortunate ambush left him wounded. Kind villagers found him. Hunith tended to him. Care and concern turned to friendship. Warmth ignited Amor's flame. The couple drew closer. He and she consummated their feelings just before his departure. He promised to return.
Alas, Reader! Promise unfulfilled….
Hunith had to have found someone else. A woman of that quality stands above all others. A smile cracked across Balinor's face. Surely, she has a man and family to care for her. If anyone deserves that, it is Hunith. He shook his head. Kilgarrah must hate me if Uther has not killed him.
"Preserve your strength, Sir Balinor. Take some of this." Wyngate held the elixir to Balinor's mouth. He eased the lime green fluid into the other's mouth. "My apologies. It is bitter."
"I know your medicines are good, Master…Wyngate." Balinor swallowed hard. Coughs echoed from his mouth. "At least…I can…give allegiance once more. I…I…wish there'd been…a son to pass…mantle on to." Pain stabbed through his side. Grimace twisted his mouth.
Where is Ywain? He knows Balinor's state! Wyngate dabbed Balinor's forehead again. Desperation shot his eyes toward the door. His own frown deepened. "Uther gave you little choice." He heard the door swing open.
"Master Wyngate?" Ywain hustled into the chamber. "I found them! There is someone else with them. The King wanted Merlin here as well."
"Merlin?" Wyngate's eyebrow arched. "Arthur's servant and Gaius' ward?" His eyes narrowed. "If that is King Rodor's wish." He stepped off to the side. "Sire! Sir Balinor awaits you!"
"King…Rodor?" Balinor braced himself up on his arm. Effort pushed him onto his good side. "Pardon me,…Sire. I…I cannot kneel…." Despite Age's frosting of Rodor's hair and beard, he recognized his friend and liege. "Thank…you for seeing me. I…abandoned…."
Rodor hustled to Balinor's bedside. Joy warmed him over the latter's return. Wyngate's eyes and posture, however, alerted him to the grim outcome. "You sacrificed for Nemeth. You abandoned no one! Father and I kept your place. It will be all right, Sir Balinor. I wish we would have been at full strength. Queen Taene, our children and I appreciate your sacrifice. There are two others you need to meet." He turned toward Merlin and Mithian. "Daughter, Merlin, please come in."
"Daughter? Merlin?" Balinor watched Merlin and Mithian enter the chamber. "Princess…Mithian?" He studied Merlin. "Did Master…Wyngate say Merlin is Gaius' ward…Arthur's servant? He…serves Camelot?" His eyes narrowed. Suspicion darkened his thoughts. "Uther…send him?"
"He does because his mother sent him to Camelot, Sir Balinor." Mithian edged her way up to Balinor's bedside. Admiration overwhelmed her. "Father and the others have told me so much. Your deeds are preserved downstairs in the Hall of Heroes. Your service and sacrifice are well known. It is an honor to meet you." Chill assaulted her senses. "Thank you."
"Well said, Daughter." Rodor rubbed her shoulder. "Nay, Sir Balinor. Uther did not send Merlin. He accompanied Princess Mithian back here. He is also one of Nemeth's heroes. He is important to you."
"Important?" Disbelief pressed a cough from Balinor. "H…How is that boy important to me?" He regarded Merlin anew. "So, Merlin is it?" He ground his teeth. His throat cleared.
"Aye, Sir Balinor." Merlin drew closer to Balinor. He met Wyngate's, Rodor's, Mithian's and then Balinor's eyes in turn. "Merlin of Ealdor actually. I am told you knew Hunith?"
Balinor stiffened. "Aye. I knew her for a brief time…a too brief time. It was long ago. You are from that village? You must know her as well." He relaxed slightly. His eyes locked in on Merlin's. Affirmation sought out any clue…any trace of Lie or Deceit in the younger man.
Merlin bit his lip. Balinor's acknowledgment answered his first question. "I know Hunith very well. She is my mother." He exhaled a deep breath. "She would never tell me about my father." He shook his head.
"Your…father?" Balinor narrowed his eyes. "Hunith…must have remarried. She…"
Merlin shook his head. "She and I are all the family we have. She never married." He studied the dying man. "She remains strong. I wish…I…." He bowed his head.
Skepticism faded ever so slightly for Balinor. He could see Reverence in Merlin's demeanor. Furthermore, Merlin's age corresponded to his time in Ealdor. "I…I…am glad someone was there for her. I am…am sorry it could not be me." Sharp breath rasped through his teeth.
Merlin nodded. "King Rodor and Princess Mithian have helped me to understand. I wish Mother could be here. She should be." Recriminations burned in his brain. Demands lay on his tongue. Balinor's regret, however, silenced those things. Instead, Determination pressed to know more from him.
Balinor scoffed that notion off. "She…thinks I deserted her. I deserve that. Listen to me. Cam…Camelot…is dangerous, Merlin. Af…After my death, you must take great care. If you are my son, you will receive my gift. Uther will kill you for it." His hand seized onto Merlin's. "Do you hear me?"
Merlin stiffened. Uther's threat remained constant to Gaius and him. That shadow fell across Morgana as well. Harassment and execution awaited any captured sorcerer. Despite Duty and Life Debts, Merlin held no illusions. Penalty remained constant….
…Uther and Aredian together made that doubly so…
"Gift?" Merlin guessed at Balinor's intent. Still, he needed to know for sure. "I already have magic. Were you a sorcerer?"
Wry sniff and cough served as Balinor's replies to him. Once more, his throat cleared. "Nay, Merlin. As King Rodor…and Princess…Mithian have said, I am a Dragon Rider. Ability…passes…" He wheezed. "…passes from father to son upon the elder's death….I…I am going…." He reached out to Wyngate. "Water please."
"Sir Balinor, you should relax. Merlin, I am sure…." Wyngate handed him the cup. Concern knitted itself across his brow. He shook his head at Merlin. He wanted his friend and patient's comfort not to be uptight or harassed.
Balinor drank another mouthful. He shook the notion off. Exhaustion weighed on his limbs and shoulders more and more. "Nay. I have to say this to Merlin. If he is my son…he…he must know." Another cough punctuated his response. "Merlin, listen…well. Dragon Lord has to be strong…has to have purpose. No doubt. Look the dragon in the eye. Remember, the Dragon's heart is on the right side. You will be…that one's brother. You will be bonded to each other. He or she has to listen to you. You also should listen…" Coughs spewed forth. Phlegm and droplets of blood dribbled from his mouth.
Merlin dabbed Balinor's mouth with a rag. "I…I understand. I have to free Kilgarrah. He is the last."
"Kilgarrah…lives?" A tear sparkled in Balinor's eye. "Uther killed…dragons…and other riders…."
Merlin rubbed his forehead. "Nay."
Rodor placed his hand on Balinor's shoulder. "Uther has kept the Great Dragon chained under Camelot in a cave. Merlin found him."
"He called out to me when I arrived there. He sensed my presence," Merlin affirmed.
Balinor nodded. "Then, you are my son. Our…our bond was already manifesting…manifesting in you. When I…I…pass on, you will…will be the last Dragon Lord. It will be you…and our heirs…to carry on line…Please, Merlin…."
Merlin nodded. Purpose steadied him in that heartbeat. Once more, he looked to Rodor and Mithian. "I will. I promise."
"Promise me that you'll free Kilgarrah. Give…give my best…to Kilgarrah. I have…asked Ywain to do so as well. Tell your mother I never…forgot…her. I am…am…sorry for ab…abandoning…her and you." Balinor grabbed Merlin's hand harder still. "Be that servant…serve others not… just… Pendragons…"
"He is that, Sir Balinor. I can assure you. He has already saved Nemeth from Cawdorian incursion." Rodor placed his hand on Balinor's arm. "We will be watching as well."
"We will be friends and support as we can be." Reverence spread a smile across Mithian's face. Purpose weighed on her shoulders. Unlike other men and previous suitors, Interest stirred her. Belonging drew her toward its Lodestone…toward its center…
…Merlin….
Her hand squeezed Merlin's. Instinct seemed to override conscious thought. Heart beat faster…and faster still. Her eyes drifted up toward the Warlock's. As we can be, Merlin. As I can be….
Her grip jarred Merlin. Telepathic affirmation further pressed him. Loyalties pressed him. Camelot and Nemeth. Protection of Sovereign vs. Protection of Heart.
"Listen, Merlin." Balinor turned to Mithian. Surprise and Realization took their turns in his mind. "You have your grandfather's gift…Princess. Destiny and goddess work here. Already, Transition is at…work. Thank…you…Princess. Thank you…Sire. Merlin, tell Hunith…tell her…I…I love her…." His eyes fluttered but remained fixed on Merlin. Defiant sparks belied his increasing weakness even as Eyelids covered them. His hand sagged and drooped. Last breath gasped from his lungs.
Merlin shook his head. Denial burned at him. His fingers probed Balinor's wrists and neck for Pulse's sign. "Father? Father! Come on!" Tears burned at his eyes. "I need you! I need…." He bowed his head. Mourning sagged down across his heart.
"He is with your ancestors now, Merlin. He has earned a measure of grace." Rodor set his hand on Balinor's brow. "Good bye, my Friend. Be at peace. Know that you did not abandon us. You saved Nemeth from war and destruction through your sacrifice. We will do what we can for you and yours. That I promise you." He glanced at her and motioned to Merlin.
"Your father…Sir Balinor…was a true hero. His deeds are remembered in the Hall of Heroes. Perhaps, you might like to see them?" Mithian turned to Rodor. "Surely we can show him?"
"Certainly. I would like Merlin to know about Sir Balinor's feats. He should understand his heritage and his opportunity." Rodor patted her hand. Merlin's situation fit within the Capability Laws. Balinor's revelation and hereditary knighthood opened Opportunity's door to Merlin. His spell disrupted Cawdor and Mercia's advance. He'd faced Meleagant and nearly died. He'd saved Prince Kay without hesitation. His service to Camelot and Nemeth in spite of Injury's duress stood out. Proof was irrefutable.
Malodius rubbed against Merlin's leg. Purrs attempted to ease his fellow being's suffering.
"I will get the window." Wyngate ambled across the chamber. His eyes kept turning between that window and the bedside scene. He unlatched the window and pushed it open. "There!" He turned toward the others. He noted Mithian's drawing closer to Merlin. Mixed feelings tightened inside of himself. Class Distinctions and Attitudes slammed into his thinking. Disapproval unsettled him to say the least. Unspoken disagreement with Rodor burned at him.
"I should be getting back. I cannot leave Morgana to face Aredian by herself." Merlin ground his teeth. Impulse and Emotion wanted to lash out. Tears welled up in his eyes. Once more, Mourning and Death swamped him. Freya's passing chilled him. Balinor's loss hit him harder still. Efforted breath followed efforted breath. "King Rodor? Princess? I am sorry. I…."
Rodor shook his head. "Merlin, your father has just died. I believe you have due reason to mourn his passing. Any servant is still a human being. There are needs to consider. We like to consider ourselves to be just and fair in that regard. Aredian is not someone to face with any less than a clear mind. Do you hear me? Princess Mithian and I admire duty. You have nothing left to prove to us. If you were not Uther's man, I would free and make you a knight right now. You have the required tasks for Nemeth and for Camelot as well. Uther and Arthur are blind to that. You suit their interests in your servile role. Consider your role in the greater expanse of things. Do not run into danger without full capabilities."
Mithian stared at him. Her hand hovered in the air mere inches from Merlin's. Desire and Friendship pushed her to take his hand. Admiration wanted to support Merlin further…in spite of Royal Propriety and all of that. Rodor's eyes, however, burned at her. Awareness made abundantly clear Rodor's and Wyngate's presence in that regard.
"Thank you." Merlin felt Mithian's warm support. "I appreciate it." He regarded Balinor. For years, he and Hunith had formed their own nuclear family. They'd interacted and lived alongside families with both parents and children. War, pestilence, hunger, famine, and Cenred's raids on the Essetir claimed neighbors and friends. Hunith conditioned Merlin to deal with the current situation. Will's loss made Balinor's absence seem more regular than an unusual occurrence. Hunith's close call years before exposed him to this loss. Freya's death tore his heart.
Balinor's corpse drove the point home.
He ground his teeth. Mourning's flood swamped him. He doggie-paddled through emotions. Breaths rasped from his lungs through his mouth. Tears drizzled salty trails over his cheeks.
"You are human I believe, Merlin. You have the right to mourn and cry for your father." Mithian rubbed his arm. Once again, Instinct pressed her to embrace him. Friendship and Amor wanted to comfort him. Expectations, however, kept her rooted in her role. "We are here, Merlin. Remember that." Her eyes met his. You are not alone. You are *never* alone. Never again. She stepped back. "Father, we should see to Lady Elaine. She is still in the dining chamber with Princess Josiane."
"Aye. We should indeed." Rodor assessed her with Merlin. Change seemed to dawn over her. With all but Accolon, Courtesy yet Restraint ruled her mindset. Accolon drew her interest. Before Negotiations' failure, Hope seemed plausible. Her look and manner with Merlin struck the same chord.
Granted, Aredian and the current situation loomed. After that, however, Opportunities awaited for Father, Daughter and Dragon Lord alike.
Opportunities and Crossroads alike….