The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face
It's been a horrible August 22 here's to life getting better, another month of spew age for you all
Be sure the truth will set you free
Mercy sat on the bed feeling empty, disgusted with herself, guilty, and a tat jealous, there was a time she'd just got everything she'd ever wanted, up to 6 weeks ago she was happy, life was good and the man she was in love with loved her back. Today she was watching the love of her life putting his clothes back on after a romp that shouldn't have happened, he wanted it, she needed it, but they both knew it was wrong
"I guess you'd better go?" she broke the silence
"I don't want to, but…"
"You better go"
"I'll see the children first" he turned to look at her "They'll be in soon yeah?"
"Half an hour" she looked at the clock on the wall "I don't want to confuse them"
"They won't be confused"
"Don't tell them" she stood up with tears in her eyes
"I won't" he huffed "I'm not even…"
"Don't" she held her hand up "Don't start dissecting what we just did"
"I'm not about to make any excuses for that, I just want you to know I didn't mean for any of this to happen, I regret it deeply"
"But it's happened, and I can't be that… this woman" she stood up "I can't just be that other woman"
"No matter what happens my love will always be wherever you are" he looked around the bedroom "I still feel the same way I felt about you the first time ever I saw your face"
"Don't" she turned and walked into the bathroom, that man was going to be the death of her, literally, telling inside jokes like that at a time like this. When she came out he wasn't there, and her mind was in mommy mode again, her priority, getting the children something to eat when they got home from their top security school. Making her way downstairs to the kitchen she thought they needed a treat, her mind was made up by the time she got there, they were having lasagne, lucky for them she'd made bulk. She took one out of the chest freezer, placed it in the oven and sat flicking through the channels on the television.
"What did you just do?" she asked herself grinning at the memory of the pleasure
The feeling of being back at stage one in this relationship that could no longer be, rested heavy on her, but how the hell was she supposed to say no to the only man she'd ever known, that had known every button in her there was to press, that knew her body better than she did, that had her heart forever, from the first time they'd locked eyes on each other. She closed her eyes praying for anyone who knew the answer to her dilemma to come forwards and give it to her.
I don't want no man to take me for a ride, just someone to hold me and keep me satisfied
And give me good loving…
Mercy's Back Story
I came from an ordinary family, I was born in America, Compton to be specific, but when I was 9 years old, due to my father's work, we moved to London, England, there I'd gone to an ordinary school, had pretty near ordinary friends and eventually figured out that my bright future was going to be in the fashion industry.
I'd got to Senior school untainted, swam through year 7 still focused on getting a good education and that job and the life I'd pictured for myself. But then suddenly in year 9 my Dad's job fell through, by which time we'd invested so much of ourselves into living, we didn't have the means to just pack up and go back to America, besides we'd left nothing to go back to.
That year my peers were moving fast towards adulthood, I was somewhere in the middle, I'd got the spots, I was constantly lethargic, and was what my mother termed quietly attractive, whatever that meant. Eventually I thought it must have been a good thing because my social group expanded, boys were in my DM's and sexually I was feeling pressured.
"You're the one to be scared of?" Damien one of the boys from my year came up to me at break asking
"Why do you say that?" I asked surprised, he'd never really taken the time to speak before, he'd liked a few of my pictures on my socials but so had lots of other people
"I heard how you handled Rory when he stepped to you" he laughed holding his hands up "Don't worry I'm not stepping"
"Rory's a fool" I laughed
"A chewing gum though" Damien laughed with a cheeky grin on his face "You're real cute though, I like a girl who knows her worth" he stood touching his chin in consideration "Laters" he smiled and walked away, leaving me smiling, his comment stayed with me
I dived into college, earning my place at the best University for fashion and textile, where I joined a study group run by a guy called Ben, I'd thought he was cute from the off, then one day I turned up for study group to find it was just the two of us "Sorry" I giggled nervously for seeing him alone "I thought…"
"It's just the two of us taking this study group serious" he laughed so cute I was smitten "They'll regret it when they walk away with thirds" he chuckled "I notice you're putting the work in"
"That's for sure" I smiled
"You have a beautiful smile"
"Thank you" I giggled like a 10 year old "Now can we get down to study I have a first I need to get"
"We can" he sat back down waiting for me to take a seat "Mercy isn't it?"
"Yeah, that's right" I looked at him impressed, ready to get my flirt on, we talked about everything and nothing
"Sorry" I felt the urge to stop the conversation "Did you say you'd left a girl at home?"
"Yeah" he smiled "And before you judge, I just like female company, I enjoy the flirt, but I love my girl" he looked at her "I've had sex many times before, but when you find someone to make love to" he smiled to himself "It means something"
"And she's alright with the flirt thing?"
"She knows what she's worth to me, a good woman always knows what she's worth"
"Ben" an annoyed voice interrupted us "I've been waiting"
"And I've been busy in my study group" we looked up at the girl obviously vexed as she flicked her extra length weave off her shoulder, staring back at him "This" he looked at me smiling "Is flirt"
"So, what would be the difference had it been love?" I enquired eager to understand
"She wouldn't have been waiting" he smiled before he got up and grabbed the girls hand
I sat thinking about the conversation, I walked away knowing I wanted to be that woman, the one that was sat at home waiting for my man to come home, the one he loved without questions, the one he thought about when he thought of having a family, the number one.
That part of my life ended with me walking into a job at Harrods, it was a start, I knew where I wanted to be, and it wasn't behind a counter selling designer outfits, I wanted to be the one making them, doing fashion shows of my own, being the person on the end of everyone's tongues when they wanted quality, and I was going to get it.
Four months in and I was shocked and surprised when Mrs Anderson walked into the store and ordered to see a few lines, I put myself out there, grabbed the pieces from the other assistant and marched out in front of the woman "Miss Anderson here we have the activewear selection, these are of course bespoke and the benefit of these are that they can form for you a capsule wardrobe, one of your choice, we have the capacity to do this with our eveningwear, junior and oversize lines" I grinned
"Oversize?" Mrs Anderson asked interested
"Yes Mrs Anderson" I smiled
"Send me some pieces and I'll have a look" Mrs Anderson directed Mrs Taylor; the floor manager, I felt like the cat that had the cream
Two months later I got a promotion to assistant to the assistant manager of the Anderson contract, giving me a little part of heaven in the store, I'd meet regularly, as part of a team, with Mrs Anderson to discuss the line, have a bit of say in what went out and as far as I was concerned I was on my way up. Life was sweet, I was meeting the right people, in the right place, at the right time, and then one day, while behind the scenes preparing the models for the show, I met the designer of Swan, the bridal company that made gowns for celebrities and the like.
"Which one is Mercy Jones?" I heard Mrs Evans the CEO of the Swan company asking Mrs Anderson
"Mercy" Mrs Anderson called waving her hand at me "Someone wants to meet you" of course I dropped everything and went over to the two women, she was nice.
A month later I was at a show, dressing ladies, when a clumsy delivery boy, bumped into me, well we bumped into each other really, and at that second the energy in the room shifted, we just stood staring at each other, I couldn't move. It was as if I'd seen something abstract for the first time and was stood staring at it trying to make out exactly what it was
"We've met before?" he finally asked
"No" I brushed my hair off my face "I don't think so"
"Sam Evans Jr" he smiled holding his hand out for shaking "Son of Anne Evans, the CEO"
"Shit" I hissed, wiping my hand down my dress before I shook his hand
"I don't want your hand" he stared into my eyes smiling "I want your lips"
"I beg your pardon?" I gasped aware everyone was watching
"Your lips" he smiled "Give them to me"
"Sam" Mrs Evans called "Leave the girl alone"
"I can't this girl is going to be my wife one day mother" he told her, the mood turned an instant cold dull blue
"Don't be ridiculous" Anne shouted, giving me a look that told me I needed to disappear, I immediately knew my place, and it wasn't beside her precious son
Of course, Sam wasn't one to take no or rejection well, he went in full pursuit of me and within a month he'd worn me down, I was totally smitten with him, surprising myself at how easy it was to fall into bed with him. And just like that, we'd started our secret relationship, he'd brought a house for us out in the country, helped me up the career ladder, then after two years of courtship the twins Emerson and Ellyse arrived, cutting my career short. For eight years the four of us had lived a blissfully happy life, grown used to the secrecy, settled into the quietness of our time together, until six weeks ago.
End of Mercy's Back Story
"Shit" she jumped up, the children would be arriving in a few second, she checked the oven and went out to get them "Hey" she smiled at them running towards her "Had a good day?"
"The best" Emerson; who's middle name was enthusiastic, pulled out something that might have started out as a clay something, but looked more like something that had been rolled around the floor "It was supposed to be the statue of liberty, but…" the eight year old smiled "I'm my dad's son" he laughed
"The cuter parts" Mercy laughed with him, giving him a hug "Five for effort though sweetheart"
"The worst" Ellyse stood at the car door waving her arms about, her middle name was dramatic "I had to walk around school hearing how much of an idiot he was for making that thing, isn't there a way you can change his face or something so we don't look so much alike, then I could maybe disown him"
"Lyse" Mercy laughed "You love him really"
"I didn't say I didn't love him, just that I needed to disown him sometimes" she hugged her mother before walking into the house
"Daddy said family's family no matter what, so sorry" Emerson grinned at his sister
"Lasagne tonight" Mercy clapped her hands
"Is daddy here?" Ellyse asked running into the house, Mercy rolled her eyes, remembering it was Sam's favourite, she'd done that without thinking
"No Sweetheart, daddy's not here"
"Will he ever live with us again?"
"I don't know sweet" Mercy answered truthfully
"I wanted to meet you guys coming in" Sam's voice filled the hall
"Daddy" the children rushed to him, he was just as happy to see them, it had been three days since he'd been able to get away
"Hey" he bent down to get their hugs "Are you guys looking after mommy like I asked?"
"Yes" they both looked at her
"So, I guess you deserve these" he took their sweets out his pocket, laughing at them cheering
"Can I have two?" Emerson asked
"I don't think Mommy will…"
"I'll share a secret" he quickly told his dad
"What secret?" he smiled watching Mercy roll her eyes and walk through to the kitchen
"Sweet" Emerson held his hand out, smiling at his dad dropping another sweet in it "Mom's doing lasagne" he covered his mouth at disclosing the secret
"Does that mean you're coming back home?" Ellyse asked
"Not yet Sweetheart" he gave the agreed response
"Don't you love us anymore?"
"Of course, I do" he picked her up and sat her on his lap "You guys and mommy are the loves of my life, you know that poppet" he kissed her forehead
"So why can't we all live together again?" Emerson asked
"Hopefully we will soon" he hugged them
"Sam" Mercy walked back into the room, feeling the need to warn him against making promises he couldn't keep
"I guess I'm needed in the kitchen" he smiled at them, frowning at her walking back into the kitchen "Watch some TV" he watched them sit on the couch and went off to see Mercy, he wasn't looking forward to it "Babe" he grabbed her waist and kissed the back of her neck, and for a second she fell into it before she remembered their dilemma
"Sam" she pulled away from him "I called you because I thought you were getting into something with the children, I don't want you to lie to them"
"This whole thing could be over in a second if you'd just let me introduce them to the family"
"You saw the look she gave me; you heard what she said, there's no way Anne would accept them, she hates me"
"Well, I'm not willing to sit back and let the alternative happen"
"What choice do you have?" she turned to look at him "You know your mother, she gets what she wants, every time"
"And you know me, I get what I want every time" he pulled her to him "And I want you, our family"
"She's announced your freaking wedding Sam" she snapped at him, pulling away
"I didn't ask her to, or agree it"
"You didn't tell me about any of the dinner parties, family gatherings that she hooked you up with that bitch at either" she huffed "You had a whole affair behind my damn back"
"It wasn't an affair, nothing happened, I just played the game for a while"
"You two played that game so good everyone thinks you two are getting married"
"We're not…"
"I…" she looked into his eyes "I know my worth Sam, I just thought you knew it too, I refuse…"
"…I do babe, you'll never come second to anyone, I promise you that, I'm working on it, I think…"
"Please" she held her hand up stopping the conversation "Could we not do this right now, the children?" she hissed under her breath "Could you?" she nodded at the table, watching him grab the plates angrily to get ready for dinner "Are you staying?"
"Yes" he smiled cheekily
"For dinner I mean" she rolled her eyes at him
"I don't like this anymore than you do babe, and I am sorting it, I promise"
"Dinner's ready" Mercy called to the children, smiling as they appeared at the table "Wash your hands and sit down" Sam sat smiling watching her, she could say it all she wanted, but he knew she wanted this as much as he did.
Sam's Story
I was the ordinary want for nothing rich kid, my world had totally changed when I clumsy bumped into Mercy, well we bumped into each other really, and in that second the energy in the room shifted for me, we just stood staring at each other, I can't even remember if I wanted to move. It was as if I was stood looking at something abstract for the first time trying to make out exactly what it was
"We've met before?" I finally asked, aware I'd been looking at her lips too long, they were drawing me in, and I didn't want to resist it. All I knew was I didn't know her right then, but I was going to and for the rest of my life "I want your lips" came out before my heart beat twice, I think she was going to give them as well, until we were so rudely interrupted, my mother went off on one in front of everyone.
"Don't be ridiculous" Mom snapped, I looked at the girl of my dreams she was frightened, that was the first impression she was going to have of me and that made me mad as hell
"Mother" I hissed "Can we have a word?" I turned and walked out the room before she could answer "I didn't appreciate the way you just treated that girl out there" I hissed again before the door closed behind her
"And I didn't appreciate your announcement, you're Sam Evans Jr, you can't marry a common girl"
"She's working with you" I threw back in her face
"Because she's top bar when it comes to designers, but she's not marriage material, not for you"
"I can marry anyone I want" I smirked at her
"See that's where your wrong" she walked towards me "Your father and I agree on that at least" she tugged at my collar "You marry the right girl, or you get nothing"
"I don't want anything"
"Except that girl out there?" she smiled at me "Who just happens to be trying to climb a ladder I hold the rungs to, so you play ball, or she doesn't climb another step" she flicked my collar "Do we understand each other?" I didn't say anything, she's curve balled me with that, I didn't have anything to come back at her with, I just cut my eye at her and walked away.
At that moment I realised what the game was, they thought they'd control my life forever, I badly wanted to walk away from it all, I'd said at the time I didn't care about the money, but without it they'd made sure I was nothing. They'd allowed me to mess up at school, I'd never been any good with books so they didn't encourage it, but my practical skills couldn't be touched, creative drawing was my thing, which they used to their full advantage in the firm.
So, I was a designer in the family business, paid well above an average wage, because of who I was, they knew I'd never find that in another company, my parent had trapped me into the life they wanted for me in the family business, and I was happy to do that, until I met Mercy.
Mother was never having the last say on my life, so I let things lay for a few days before I went in pursuit of Mercy, it took some talking, and a lot of resistance on her part, but by the end of the month, we were having our first date. The little Caribbean restaurant she introduced me to, soon became our cosy spot, our love grew in that place, they'd always play that track 'Gimmie Good Lovin' by Natural Touch for us. I'm convinced it was on the first time we slept together, we woke up with a pregnancy on the table, of course Mercy was infuriated, she understood the dynamics of our relationship, maybe more than I did at the time, but I convinced her that everything was going to be alright, so we had the babies.
My life changed when they were born, I didn't want to be an absent father, so I became a busy one instead, working hours were easy, I brought us a home in a little village forty miles away from the city, where I'd spend my nights, passing by the big house in the morning to start all over again, then six weeks ago everything fell apart
We'd had the best night, I was trying to get her to agree to extending out family, we were in bed conversing when without warning, the announcement was made "Mr & Mrs Sam Evans Senior announced the engagement of their son Sam Jr and…."
"What?" Mercy sat up in bed asking me "You're engaged?"
"No" I looked at the TV shocked "I don't know anything about this"
"You don't?" she pointed at the TV showing pictures of me and this newfound fiancé at dinner together, at an event, in a car "You weren't there for all of that?"
"That isn't what it looks like"
"So, you're not engaged?"
"Mercy…"
"Get out" she jumped out of bed telling me "Get up grab for shit and get out" she screamed
"Mercy" I looked at her, I was angry as hell but not with her, I needed to sort this out "I'll be back" I got up to grab my clothes, dragging my trousers on
"No, you won't" she hissed at me
"The children…" I gasped
"Don't exist remember" she stood looking at me
"I'm coming back" I snapped, pulled my shirt on, and left
And since that day, I've been on a mission, going back home at every opportunity, Mercy had given up everything when the children were born, financially they depended on me, but that wasn't as much as I depended on them emotionally and physically.
Today had been a breakthrough for me, she'd let me back in to our bed, which meant there was hope. I'd spent the past six weeks productively, I'd moved some stuff around, got my affairs in order, and I was finally at a place confident enough to say what my parents want doesn't matter. True I was taking a pay cut, but I'd got more than enough saved to soften that blow.
End of Sam's Story
"Can I put them to bed before I go?" Sam asked testing the waters
"Sure" she smiled happy the children were getting something of a normal evening
The night went as planned, when Sam came downstairs Mercy was standing at the front door, obviously telling him she had no further use for him "Can I just…" he grabbed her hand
"Sam" she tried to pull away from him "I meant it, that can't happen again"
"It can happen whenever we want it to, please just hear me out" he grabbed an envelope out his pocket "Sit down" he looked at her "Please?"
"What is it Sam" she rolled her eyes and sat down, staring at him
"I think we both knew, the first time we saw each other we knew this was meant to happen, and that hasn't changed for me, has it changed for you?"
"No" she smiled "But it's not about…"
"Listen" he stopped her "You know I've been working on us being together for a while"
"Eight years" she rolled her eyes again
"Well, these past few weeks I've been putting the work in, and we're there" he smiled "It's all legal and above board" he assured her "Could you sign this for me please?" he pulled the paperwork out of the envelop and placed it on her lap
"What is it?" she looked at it
"Everything we have, well at the moment it's everything I have, but I'm signing it all over to you"
"Why?"
"So, they can't touch us" he smiled "By tomorrow morning, they'll know what I've done" he smiled at her "Sign it"
"You chose us?" she grinned
"Always" he pushed her hair off her face "I love my family" he kissed her cheek
"Thank you" she whispered taking his kiss "For seeing our worth"
"I've always known our worth babe"
"Sometimes it didn't feel like it" she frowned
"I'm sorry about that, but I had an agenda" he pushed his bottom lip out at her "Plus I really want to add to our family"
"Was that your idea of a proposal?" she laughed
"Did it work?" he laughed
"Maybe" she grabbed a pen and signed the paperwork
"You just inherited 1.5 billion" he laughed
"How much?" she gasped
"So, now we can afford it, will you marry me?"
"How do you expect me to answer that?" she laughed
"Yes"
"Yes" she grinned pulling him in for a kiss
"Tomorrow morning we're going to break the news" he told her "All four of us"
"Are you sure?"
"There'll be five of us if I have my way tonight" he smiled
"I feel a fifth coming on, the prospect of telling the truth has surprisingly set me free"
"Me too" his kissed pushed her to lay on the couch "All you need is some loving yeah?"
"Yeah, some good, good loving" she grinned running her fingers through is hair