Something Stupid
Don't let what you can't do interfere with what you can do
They wouldn't lie and say the past four years hadn't provided some of the more challenging times they'd had in their relationship, they'd broken up and got back together more times than they'd care to remember, but it was never anything serious enough to keep them apart for more than a week. Now things were changing for them again, school had finished, the last summer had happened, and Sam had taken a college placement in New York studying Art and music, while Mercy had qualified for her dream and gone off to Los Angeles to pursue music and drama.
Four months ago, when they first got what they wanted there was no one more excited for them than they were, but now summer was over, autumn was setting in and everyone was buzzing with the excitement of taking on the next step in their lives, but sad about severing relationships.
Sam and Mercy; against all odds were saying good luck, not goodbye, they'd decided what they had could last the distance, so they were going for it, they'd got engaged in the summer, had a massive party to celebrate their love to the envy of some of their friends, and now they were ready to test time.
"Just go" she lay on her bed leaning on her elbows with tears running down her face telling him "Just call when you get to the airport"
"I will" he stood in the bedroom door smiling "I miss you already" he wiped his wet face
"I miss you too" she smiled "Now go before you make me cry again"
"Just…" he rushed back to the bed and kissed her, both falling onto the bed with the force of it "Don't forget me" he pulled away begging her
"Never, I'm going to be Mrs Evans remember?" she waved her engagement ring at him "You don't get more stuck with me than that"
"Two years" he smiled
"And every holiday in between" she reminded him
"Every holiday" he agreed "I'm glad you're not coming to the airport, I wouldn't leave"
"Go" she frowned, watching him get up to leave again, he stopped at the door to smile at her "No" she snapped at him taking a picture of her "Safe journey babe" she giggled at him snapping even more, giving him a cheeky reveal at the last second
"Safe journey to you too babe" he stood looking at her for a second before he turned and walked out the door closing it behind him, she could hear him talking to her parents for a minute or so before the door shut, and he was gone
Sam's POV
I jumped in my car and took the seven minute drive home, we both lived in a fairly affluent part of the city, afforded by our parents careers, with only seven families living in the ten mile radius, it meant everyone knew everyone. Weekends were generally centred around someone's house for an impromptu den party with no alcohol of course, and very little else except good music, some first base make out sessions, and the usual party games. I smile at the fact that I was finally heading into adult territory today and when I eventually arrived home I'd be a full grown man, ready to take on the responsibility of a wife and maybe a family
I was leaving within the hour, my parents were taking me to the airport, they'd helped sort my accommodation, topped up my all-important allowance, there was due to be some food delivered on my arrival, and between Mercy and I we'd managed to sort me a part time job in one of the recording studio's one of her uncle's owned just ten minutes from the apartment, it was all falling into place. The aim was to save enough money to get a deposit for a small apartment or something in town once we'd graduated, so we could work and live together, neither of us fancied going back home after we'd finished college
I got to the airport, in more than enough time, unloaded the boot, and my dad shocked and surprised me with a new guitar, the moment was emotional as he told me he shared my dream of big things, and that he knew I had it in me. That was a really big thing for my dad he was well known for his hard face and ruling iron fist. My parents weren't fans of the engagement initially, they thought we were too young, hadn't experienced enough of life yet to make such a life changing decision, but by the time we had the engagement party, Mercy was their daughter-in-law and the two families had gelled well.
Every part of the journey to New York was a frightening, exciting moment, the fear of leaving everything I'd ever known behind, the anticipation of everything that was to come, I missed everything and everyone already and the plane hadn't even lifted off yet. Mercy and I had cried more than once in the fourteen hour journey, and as soon as my feet touched New York soil she was the first one I'd called absolutely excited for the bright lights and big city, it was everything we'd always dreamed it would be. She wasn't here with me, but I was determined she was going to share every experience with me through my phone so of course I became the tourist, pictures, and videos of everything.
It might not have been the first thing I saw when I got out the cab and walked towards the apartment block, but as soon as I walked into the building I zoned in on the notice for musicians wanted and that was definitely me "Grab every opportunity" I smiled at our pact humming in his mind. I took a picture, ripped the notice of the board, and went in search of my apartment. Mercy and I had been down a month previous with my parents in tow, we'd brought furniture, books and left most of my clothes, so I was already familiar with what home was going to be like for the next two years.
I got in, put the last few items I'd brought with me away and accepted the groceries before I decided to venture out to see what was going on at the campus, which was only a three minute walk away. There was music playing everywhere, people dancing, singing, playing, it was like one big free for all, like glee club on a massive scale. I held my phone up and took a live shot of the hall sending it to Mercy as I marvelled in the excitement of being a student in the college I really wanted to be at.
"Wow" I gasped at seeing the one and only Stormzy singing on stage as I walked into the main hall "Deja Vu" I smiled, holding my phone up to film it for Mercy, our engagement party had rocked to this song, it was on repeat about four times we were all so up for it
..Oh, girl, you're shining, you know you're my diamond, you need reminding, this moment of timing when your, soul needs aligning
It's me you confide in, seeking and hiding, you know where to find me, babe,
Feeling (I can feel it) pressure, pressure (don't you get that) diamonds (you know where to find me, babe)
Feeling (I can feel it), pressure (feel the pressure), pressure, diamonds (you're my diamond, oh)…
I stood singing along bringing back the memories of my girl rocking the hell out of it to please me, as I filmed it, I swung round to do a pan view and my eyes met with a blond girl who seemed to be focused on me, I looked around hoping she was looking at someone else before I looked back and smiled at her, I needed to make friends, but she was giving off some vibes with all that eye contact as she sang, I knew straight away she was someone to stay clear of
….What we looking for?, let me search now, take your shoes off, put your purse down
How you going to tell me that it's never going to work now?... 'Hide & Seek' by Stormzy
I smiled again and dismissed the situation, returning back to the song and the mood of the crowd, the song finished, and I stood watching another band jump on stage, these guys were much younger, students maybe, I bit the bullet and went up to them, watching as they set up
"Hey" I smiled at one of the guys "Are you this band?" I took the flyer out my pocket
"Yeah" the guy smiled "What do you play?"
"Guitar"
"Can you tune that one?" he pointed at one leaned against the speaker
"Yeah" my eyes widened at the offer
"Consider this your audition"
"Alright" I smiled grabbing the guitar thanking god for my dad pushing the instrument into my hand at the age of five, I can't lie, I played the hell out of that song, and the other five that followed, the handshakes that followed afterwards sort of told me I'd got the job. I didn't know how I was going to fit it in between everything else I'd already committed to, but what I did know was that it felt good to be up there.
"Hi" someone approached me from the back, tapping my shoulder to get my attention
"Hi" I spun around to see it was the girl from earlier stood grinning at me
"I'm Brittany"
"Sam" I smiled offering my hand
"We" she looked at some girls stood behind her, without taking my handshake "Sort of follow the band, if you're going to be one of them you should come to the party tonight at Chase house" she smiled "That's their house, we can't have parties"
"Yeah, I kind of know that" I rolled my eyes at the obvious
"So" she grabbed her hair and started playing with it "Will I, I mean we, see you there?"
"If I'm invited" I turned to look at the guy who'd invited me into the band
"You're invited" he held his hand out "Spencer" he smiled "Ryder over there and that's Joe" he pointed at the guy behind the drums, we nodded acknowledgement, at each other "Ten or there abouts, bring your guitar"
"Will do" I agreed before taking another memory picture and walking away, happy with myself for bagging that on the first day, and how proud Mercy would be of me
"I'll look out for you" that Brittany called after me, still being polite I turned and smiled, because I was up for playing that game and my girl fights dirty
I went to the party it really wasn't what I expected everyone was just sitting around playing music, singing along and smoking pot "Hey" Brittany sat beside me, she seemed to appear out of nowhere "Do you sing with the band?"
"I don't, but I can sing" I smiled at her handing me a half full cup "I don't drink either"
"It's juice" she smiled at me
"Oh" I smiled sheepishly and took the cup before strumming my guitar again
"I love this song" she hummed, I wanted to stop because it was personal, but I didn't want to explain anything to this stranger, so I carried on strumming she smiled at me and started singing. People started to look and suddenly I was in a spot, either stop playing and walk away, or sing this intimate song with this random girl and think of my girl.
Brittany: All I knew this morning when I woke is I know something now, know something now I didn't before
And all I've seen since 18 hours ago, is green eyes and freckles, and your smile in the back of my mind making me feel like
I just want to know you better, know you better, know you better now, I just want to know you better, know you better, know you now
I looked around sized up the situation and smiled at this random singing and decided to do the gentlemanly thing and not blow this girl up
Both: I just want to know you better, know you better, know you better now, I just want to know you, know you, know you
Cause all I know is we said hello, your eyes look like coming home, all I know is a simple name, and everything has changed
All I know is you held the door, you'll be mine and I'll be yours, all I know since yesterday, is everything has changed
"You two sound great together" Ryder sat on the couch beside us raving "You should link up for the half term concert" he suggested
"That would be great" Brittany smiled "We could practice that for our signature song" she giggled "It's going to be great working with you"
"I" there was a lot I had to say, but nothing I wanted to explain to this girl "I look forward to it" was all I found before I got up and left the party, I was feeling like Judas having omitted the existence of my fiancé three times in less than twenty four hours. I didn't stop there I carried on digging that hole when I got in that evening excited to tell Mercy about everything that had happened still omitting the fact that I'd agreed to sing a duet with another woman. I don't actually know why I did that as I had no intention of anything happening between that girl and me, I was probably reacting off how I would have reacted had she given me that information while I was so far away from her.
For the six weeks of practice with the band and Brittany I could definitely feel the band coming together, what felt worse was the fact that Brittany seemed to be getting attached. I hadn't said or done anything to make her think it, but at the same time I hadn't mentioned Mercy either. All the guys had ditched their girls before rocking up to college and I just didn't want to be known as the odd guy out, I was sure that news would bring more pressure from Brittany to mess my shit up.
So, it was the day of my first graded performance, and I was nervous as hell, my parents were coming in, then after the concert we were going out for food, they were only staying the night because dad had to get back to work, but I was grateful they'd took the time. I was sat on the phone to Mercy walking her through everything that was going on, she was calming me down and getting me to focus, telling me the nerves would disappear once I got the first note out. I heard my name; I heard Brittany's, and I knew it was on, we walked onto the purpose built stage and started the intimate song. I was having fun we'd practiced the hell out of the song, the band was on point, we were sweet, I looked up into the crowd for my parents, I needed to see proud I guess, but I was met with Mercy's thunderous stare, shock wasn't the word, but all I could do was carry on singing
Sam: …And all my walls stood tall, painted blue, and I'll take them down, take them down, and open up the door for you
Brittany: And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies, the beautiful kind, making up for lost time, takin' flight, making me feel like, like
Both: I just want to know you better, know you better, know you better now, I just want to know you better
Know you better, know you better now… 'Everything Has Changed' by Taylor Swift & Ed Sheeran
I couldn't get of the stage quick enough when the song finished, every clap seemed to take an hour, eventually we walked off stage
"What happened?" Brittany asked aware something had happened for me halfway through the song
"I got to go" I backed off and rushed away, through the back and round to where my parents were sat "Where's Mercy?" I asked my mom as I slid into the seat she'd been sitting in
"Where do you think" mom snapped at me, I deserved it, I got up and went to look for her
"Mercy" I walked through the corridors checking every bathroom on the way to the entrance, as I got there I could have slapped myself for wasting time as she drove off in some random car "Mercy" I attempted to do that Will Smith thing and run down the car, but it just wasn't my day, if she looked back I didn't see it. I called her phone a couple of times, but I really didn't expect her to answer, I just needed her to know I was thinking about her, the thing I was running from had suddenly hit me in the face and there was nothing I could do about it
"Sam" Brittany was standing on the college steps shouting me, I walked towards her looking like a wet rag "What's happened?"
"I" I looked at her before sitting on the step "Can I trust you?" I huffed
"Yes" she smiled "What's happened?"
"I didn't tell my fiancé I was singing with you, she turned up today, assumed the worst and now she's drove off, hasn't even given me time to explain"
"Why didn't you tell her?"
"Because if she was telling me something like that I'd have burst a blood vessel"
"You mean because you thought I liked you like that?" she asked
"Don't you?" I looked at her shocked, sure I was reading the signs right
"You're a great friend, actually I was attracted to the fact that you didn't hit on me" she laughed "And my wife would have more than something to say about it if you had"
"Wife?" I smiled and rolled my eyes "I feel like such an idiot"
"We refused to wait until after college, we got married two months ago, still very much in love, daily Skype sexing like it's going out of fashion" she laughed "What do you say we go get our grade and then you go get your girl?"
"I can do that" I smiled, because I could, I wanted to
I smiled politely when they told me I'd passed my piece, said a quick hello to my parents and went off to the airport to find my girl, rushed through the crowds like someone possessed, searching for her, I looked up at the departures and realised I didn't even know if she was going home or back to college. I contemplated doing one of those mad dashes past security and down to the departure area, no musician worth his or her salt hadn't had a run in with the law, but the vision of my dad's disapproving face telling me I wasn't ready for a serious relationship, put a stop to that one, I sat in the arrivals area feeling helpless
I flooded her phone with calls saying nothing at first then messages begging her to come back, then I went into sending angry one's damning her for not trusting me, the last message ended with a fuck it and I couldn't take it back because I'd been mad enough to send it already.
I don't know how long I sat there but when I finally looked up I saw my parents coming towards me "Mom, dad" I got up "I thought you were staying till tomorrow?"
"We are sweet" the way she looked back at my dad; I knew something else was coming
"What did she say?" I asked
"She.." mom looked at dad, her eyes asking for help "She asked us to give you this" she held her hand out producing Mercy's engagement ring "I don't like to say it son"
"But you're going to say it anyway" I snapped
"Sam" dad snapped back at me, they loved their I told you so moments, and to be honest on this occasion I was going to have to suck this up "Your mother's right, you two were much too young to even understand about relationships let alone get into this marriage thing"
"So, you guys aren't up for it then?"
"Of course, we are, she's like a daughter to us" mom snapped "Why didn't you just tell her, are you seeing that girl?"
"No" I snapped "I'm not seeing anyone other than Mercy, we're engaged to be married, how could you ask me that?" I raked my hands through his hair with frustration "Where's she gone?"
"Lima" dad told me
"We're just friends who decided to do the concert together, nothing else"
"It looked pretty real to me" mom frowned
"We're being graded on it, it needed to look real"
"I'd say you earned that grade son" dad patted my shoulder like I'd done something great in losing Mercy
"I've got to get to Lima, I need to sort this out" my intentions were to gab some clothes and catch the next available flight
"Son" dad stopped me in my tracks "Mercy would be even angrier to hear you hadn't finished the semester, remember the plan?"
"I guess" I rolled my eyes at my dad's truth "I'll go the end of the week, will you tell her I'm coming, and I'll explain everything"
"We can try, but you know your girl"
"Which is why I don't want this festering for a whole week" I knew there was nothing I could do until I saw her, she wasn't about to answer my calls, but that didn't stop me trying all week, and on Friday afternoon I caught the first available flight home.
End of Sam's POV
Arriving late that night didn't stop him from jumping in his car and going straight over to her parents' house, his life was on the line "Mrs Jones" he smiled as she opened the door "Before you say anything she's got it all wrong, I'd never do anything to disrespect her"
"Whatever this is, you two need to sort it out, I've spent a fortune on this wedding already" she laughed "She's not here" she stopped him coming in "She's at the school, Quinn was down there, she's not long gone, you'll catch them if you hurry"
"Thanks" he smiled leaving to make the journey, the place was still full of fresh memories, something happened in every corner of it that was smile worthy. He got to the school and walked through the gates and round the back to the music studios, stopping as he got to the ball court
"Dude" he smiled at seeing Puck shooting hoops
"Dude" Puck knocked fists with him "What the hell?" disappointment in his voice
"She's got it all wrong" Sam defended himself
"Fix it"
"Why do you think I'm here"
"They're in studio one, go" Puck told him watching him leave
He burst through the door and stood listening to her crying as she spoke to Quinn, it had been a week and she was still crying, "Mercy" his voice a broken whisper, the two women turned to look at him "Can we talk" he watched her give Quinn the go ahead to leave, he expected it, so he took Quinn's disapproving look, then took a deep breath before he went to Mercy
"Before you say anything I need to say something" she looked at him
"Babe"
"Please babe just let me say this" a tear fell down her face "I realise it was an impossible thing to ask of anyone, we were stupid to think we could survive through two years apart, I'm not going to lie" the tremble in her voice making his heart break "It's going to kill me to let you go, but I know it's the right thing to do"
"Babe" he covered her lips with his finger "I don't want to hear that" he hugged her and let her cry "I admit I should have told you about Brittany, but if this had been the other way round I'd have busted a blood vessel and maybe his damn face" he rubbed her back "Call that another Evans move, it was wrong, I did something stupid and I apologise"
"Did you sleep with her?" she moved away from him to ask
"What?" he jerked with the shock of the question "No, why would you think that, no I didn't, I'd never…" he grabbed her hand "She's married" he frowned "And I'm sure her wife would have something to say about me making a move on her, even though that would never happen"
"A wife?"
"A wife" he confirmed "I love you"
"Still?"
"This duet" he looked into her eye "Is never going to end"
"Are we sure?" she looked at their mingled fingers "I mean the first sign of trouble, I'm running to the hills, got you in bed with another woman, and calling the wedding off, I suck at this"
"You're my suck at this and I missed you" he put his arm on her shoulder "All this drama I need it" he laughed
"You purposely pissed me off?" she tilted her head asking
"No, I mean I need you to keep loving me"
"I do love you babe" she leaned in and kissed him "And I'm sorry I didn't ask questions"
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you from the off" he frowned "We're allowed to mess up sometimes right?"
"As long as we work on fixing it" she agreed "And I promise I'll do that in the future"
"We'll do that too"
"Did you pass?"
"Of course," he laughed "And we have a week"
"All that matters is that we get our grades" she hugged him "I have to trust you"
"I have to trust you too"
"No more secrets?"
"No more"