Day 18: Salazzle

(BGM: Route 4 Theme from Sun & Moon)

Me: You know what I wonder sometimes, Lyra?

Lyra: What's that WildCard?

Me: We already know that Game Freak is most likely high when coming up with ideas for new Pokemon…but what kind of stuff do you think they're on when they make an attractive Pokemon?!

…

Lyra: I'm nowhere near as depraved as you are, so I'm not even going to attempt to give a response to that question.

Me: Hey, I'm not depraved!

(Lyra holds up the following fics that I've written: 'Summer Lovin'', 'Love Potion Lunacy', and 'Lusty Tales from the Steam Room'. As she does, she raises an eyebrow at me)

Me: Oh, that's just not fair.

Lyra: Deal with it, smutmonger.

Yeah, for reasons unknown, and for some reason, Game Freak feels the need to make a Pokemon attractive. Every generation has at least one, you name it; Gardevoir, Lopunny, Delphox, Tsareena, Primarina, Zoroark, and who knows how many others. Hell, it's gotten to the point where fans have taken Pokemon that ordinarily wouldn't be attractive and make them attractive…hello again, Vaporeon copypasta *angry face*!

Now, with all of this in mind, I have to wonder one thing about when Sun and Moon was initially released…

…

How much of a field day did DeviantArt and Rule 34 have when Salazzle hit the scene?!

(Insert Salazzle cry here)

(BGM: Team Skull Grunt Battle from Sun and Moon)

Oh, boy, you thought Lopunny and Gardevoir were the most sexualized Pokemon in existence, wait until you read some of Salazzle's Pokedex entries.

'For some reason, only females have been found. It creates a reverse harem of male Salandit that it lives with.' - Sun

'Salazzle lives deep in caves and forces the Salandit it has attracted with its pheromones to serve it.' - Ultra Sun

Yes, what you read is canon. We have a Pokemon that can create a reverse harem! This is Pokemon, a kid friendly franchise, and just the thought of Game Freak making a Pokemon like this just makes me burst out laughing every single time I think about it. I can weirdly see a child and his parent having an interaction that goes something like this.

(BGM briefly changes to Celadon City theme from Fire Red and Leaf Green)

Kid: Mommy what's a reverse harem?

Parent: Junior! Where did you learn that term?!

Kid: From Pokemon.

Parent: I knew those video games were bad news. (Throws the kid a book) Here, read a book! You'll get more out of that than a stupid video game.

Kid: 'Flowers in the Attic'? That sounds lovely!

(Kid leaves to read the book, but when he does…)

Kid: What the fu-

(Back to the Team Skull Grunt Battle Theme)

Okay, funny skit time is over let's get to talking about what makes Salazzle so awesome.

Well, first off, it has a very appealing and slick design, with the bits of magenta on its body going well with Salazzles darker colors. I also really like the magenta flame pattern on Salazzles chest and stomach to show how this poison type has a fiery side too…seriously Salazzle was the only Poison-Fire type before Iron Moth came along.

Poison-Fire, however, while a unique type, isn't the best defensive wise. With this typing, Salazzle is weak to Water, Rock, Psychic, and Ground moves, the latter of which she has a quadruple weakness too.

Her stats also aren't that great defensive wise, making Salazzle a bit of a glass cannon…but damn, does she do a good job at it!

Where Salazzle lacks in defenses, she makes up for in spades with speed and special attack, and Salazzle gets a lot of great moves to take advantage of the latter stat. Some examples include classics that you'd expect her to have like Flamethrower and Sludge Bomb, but other moves that might pique your interest would be Dragon Pulse, Heat Wave, Hyper Voice, Overheat, and Gunk Shot.

Unfortunately, it doesn't get a lot of other Special Attacking moves to take advantage of, but for what we got, I'm pleased. And the Physical Attacking moves that it gets like Poison Jab, Dragon Claw, Leech Life, Acrobatics, and Body Slam have their own uses as well.

I'm very willing to excuse all of Salazzle's shortcomings for one reason, though, and that reason is its ability…Corrosion! With this ability Salazzle can poison anything…and yes, that includes Steel and other Poison types! And, what's this? Salazzle can learn Toxic naturally and Toxic Spikes through HM?

Oh, ho, ho! Me likey!

Sure, Salazzle could also have Oblivious for a hidden ability, which prevents you from being infatuated by another Pokemon but…why would you ever go for that? Corrosion is clearly the better ability.

In conclusion, Salazzle, while it falls short in the defenses and doesn't get too many special attacking moves to play with, I'm willing to forgive because of the great attacking moves it does get, along with its amazing ability.

I'm no scalie, but this is one lizard that I'd like to have by my side anywhere, anytime.