Hello everyone, I'm back, before my last AATC fanfic, the last time I uploaded a fanfic in the AATC category was in 2017, and then four years later in 2021, I made a parody called 'Chipmunks go to the movies: Billy Bonka and the ice-cream factory', that was over two year ago, and now I'm back once again, and with a new story, a prequel, which I've never done before in my 11 years on Fanfiction.
Action camera, light up the big screen,
Chipmunks go to the movies.
Hollywood magic, the maker of dreams,
Chipmunks at the movies.
No matter who you are,
You can be the star,
Adventures so classic,
The thrills are fantastic to see.
Bring on the actors, and light up the set,
Chipmunks go to the movies,
Incredible stunts and those special effects,
Chipmunks at the movies.
Imagine you're the star,
No matter who you are,
Come on along with us,
Come sing a song with us,
We've saved a seat for you,
There's always something new.
Cameras are rolling, lets get the shot,
Chipmunks go to the movies,
Feel the excitement, the action is hot,
Chipmunks we'll bring the movies to you.
Inside the balcony of a luxurious theatre, Alvin, Simon, Brittany, Jeanette and Eleanor sat down and relaxed, they turned to the audience.
" Hello again, and welcome to another segment of Chipmunks go to the movies", said Alvin.
" Over two years ago, we made a feature called Billy Bonka and the ice-cream factory, a parody of the 1971 film " Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory", which starred Gene Wilder, and Jack Albertson", said Simon.
" In December 2023, a prequel to the film was released, called Wonka, and it starred Timothee Chalamet as Willy Wonka, Hugh Grant as the Oompa Loompa, it also has well known cast members like Olivia Coleman, Rowan Atkinson, Sally Hawkins, Matt Lucas, Keegan Michael Key, and many more, and since it's release, it became the eighth highest grossing film of 2023", said Jeanette.
" By mid 2023, after seeing the trailer, the six of us gathered together to discuss the film, and decided if we should make a parody of this one as well", said Brittany.
Theodore then arrived, at another dessert tray.
" Never change Theodore", said Eleanor.
Simon then picked up the remote.
" And so without further ado, here is our new feature, Bonka", said Simon.
Bonka.
Starring.
Simon: Billy Bonka (Based on Willy Wonka)
Alvin: Woompa Loompas (Based on the Oompa Loompas)
Jeanette: Nita (Based on Noodle).
Brittany: Bessie the Milk Maid.
Theodore: Mr. Cod.
Eleanor: Miss Green.
It was a cold morning in the ocean, a large ship was sailing, on top of a crows nest, a man was gazing out in the horizon, his name, was Billy Bonka.
" Seven years I've been gone, traveling the seven seas, finding seven hundred ingredients, through the seven continents of the world, and now I am here, ready to start my future", Billy said to himself, he gazed out in the horizon, to see the sun rising, and the shore was shown.
" LAND AHOY", Billy shouted.
Climbing down the crows nest, Billy went into his cabin, grabbing his only possessions, which included, a black top hat, a dark blue over coat, a black cane, and a colorful carpet bag.
Got a tattered overcoat
and battered suitcase,
got a pair of leaky boots
upon my feet.
" Good luck cook", called one of the crew members, wishing Billy the best of luck.
Got to drag myself
up on my one good bootlace,
got to work my rotten socks off
if I want to make ends meet.
He also counted how much money he has, which was only a 20 euro note, and four 1 euro coins, he stuffed the money into his pocket before leaving the cabin.
Once at the top deck, he approached the end, where there was a bridge, and he climbed on, leaving the ship.
I've poured everything I have
into my chocolate,
now it's time to show the world
my recipes.
" GOOD LUCK BILLY", the captain shouted, in which Billy responded with a salute.
I've got twenty four
euro in my pocket,
and a hatful
of dreams.
He then approached a train station, purchased a ticket, with five euro, he gave the ticket seller the 20 euro note, and was given in change, a ten euro note and a five euro note, he looked at the ship he spent the last seven years on one final time, and waved his old friends goodbye before boarding.
Once he boarded the train, it chugged of down the tracks.
Sometime later, the train stopped in the middle of a town, Billy got off the train, and was walking through the town, it was full of shops and market stalls.
There's a famous restaurant
on every street here,
there's Brandino's,
and the bar
golden domain.
" Restaurant map sir, two euro", said a boy, delivering maps.
" Thank you", said Billy, purchasing a map, with his five euro note, and was given three one euro coins change.
Got a little map
to tell me where to eat here.
Started with two dozen euro
somehow seventeen remain.
While looking at the map, he walked past a stall selling china plates.
Want the finest produce,
this is where they stock it.
Not looking, he accidently knocked a small vase over to the ground.
" That'll be four euro", said the shop owner.
Though the prices are so
terribly extreme.
He gave the shop owner the ten euro note, who in return, gave him six one euro coins in change, Billy checked how much money he has left, thirteen one euro coins.
I've got just thirteen euro
in my pocket,
and a hatful of dreams.
However after looking down, he noticed his boots were being polished by a young kid, sighing in frustration, he gave the kid two euro, leaving him with eleven, and then he continued walking, until he enters the heart of the city, the Gourmet Galleria.
" At last, the Gourmet Galleria, I knew one day that I would see ya, it's everything I've ever dreamed, and even so much more, each way that you turn another famous Candy store", Billy sang, looking through the three famous candy stores of the Gourmet Galleria.
Terrance Trufflesnout's Terrific Treats.
Francis Finnywig's Fantastic Flavors.
Salazar Snakesworth's Sizzling Sweets.
As he looked at each store, he began to imagine, how his store will be like.
Here's my destiny
I just need to unlock it,
will I crash and burn
or go up like a rocket,
I've got eleven euro
in my pocket,
and a hatful of dreams.
Billy imagined himself, selling every chocolate, marshmallow, beverages, ice-cream, and so many other candies to the customers, as they all joined in the dance.
Little did he know, a police officer was watching him, noticed he was daydreaming, dancing, the police officer approached him, and tapped him on the shoulder.
" No daydreaming", said the police officer, pointing at a sign, Billy turned to look at it.
NO DAYDREAMING, PENALTY: 6 EURO.
Sighing, Billy gave the officer six euro, leaving him with only five.
It became dark, and Billy was walking past to buildings, hoping to find a hotel.
In this city
anyone can be successful,
if they've talent
and work hard
or so they say.
But they never mention
how it'd be so stressful,
just to make two dozen euro
last more than a day.
" Excuse me sir", a pale old beggar said, sickly, approaching Billy, " Could you please spare some change".
" Here, take all you need", said Billy, handing the beggar four of his remaining five euro.
" Bless your kind heart", said the beggar, before limping away.
I've got one single euro
in my pocket,
and a hatful of dreams.
He placed the remaining coin into his pocket, however, it fell out of a small hole, and it bounced off the ground, into a small storm drain.
Billy sighed sadly, although tomorrow he already has a plan to make more money, he'll have to get through the night, without any problems so he can be able to make his accomplishment.
Billy sat down on a bench, pulled out his carpet bag, and opened it, pulling out a blanket, and a cup.
" A nice hot chocolate before bed is very soothing, and a story", Billy said to himself, pulling out a book the title of the book says "Alice's adventures in Wonderland".
He also pulled out a small pot, and pot out hot chocolate and warm milk into the cup, before stirring it.
It was then he discovered a dog approaching him.
" Oh hello there", said Billy, only to noticed the dog growling and getting closer.
" Woah, easy, stay, sit, back up", Billy said, panicking as the dog got close to his leg.
" Nibbles, sit", a voice growled out from the shadows, the dog, Nibbles, sat down, Billy looked to see two men approaching Billy.
" I hope you don't minds Nibbles, she seems to take an interest in you", said one of the men.
" It must be these pants, I got them from a man in America", said Billy.
" Oh really, where in America", said the second man.
" Uh, North America", said Billy.
" I mean what state", said the second man.
" Oh, uh, I think Kentucky, I got it from some guy named Sanders, and it must still have the smell of chicken on it, which explains the dogs interest", said Billy.
" You're not planning on sleeping the night there are you", said the first man.
" Don't worry, it's just for one night, tomorrow I plan to make my fortune", said Billy.
" It's very cold out here, and it won't be dawn for another 9 hours, by then you'll freeze to death", said the second man.
" I'll be fine", said Billy, pulling out the spoon from his cup, only to discover that the milk is frozen into a popsicle and is stuck to the spoon.
" Okay fair enough, but sadly, I'm not able to afford a room", said Billy.
" That's a shame, well, I guess it's a good thing we crossed paths with you", said the first man.
" We know someone who can help you out", said the second.
" Do you", said Billy.
Billy followed the two men down a dark alley, until they came across an old building.
The voice of an old woman called out to them.
" HAGGIS, BOGUS, DID YOU TWO BRING IN THE GIN", the lady shouted.
" We bought something better Agatha", said Haggis.
" We bought a guest", said Bogus.
The door opened, revealing a woman in her mid 40's, skin wrinkly, yellow teeth.
" Oh why didn't you say so", said the woman, Agatha, grinning, showing her yellow teeth.
" Welcome to Crinkle's, guest house and wash house, me casa is you casa", said Miss Crinkle, welcoming Billy inside the house.
" Thank you Ma'am, much appreciated", said Billy, entering the house.
" I'm Agatha Crinkle, but feel free to call me Miss Crinkle, Make yourself at home, and warm yourself by the fire, any chance of a glass of gin", said Miss Crinkle.
" Oh, well", before Billy could respond, Miss Crinkle called out from behind.
" Nita, get off your book, and fetch us a gin, this poor man is frozen", Miss Crinkle called out.
" You and your brothers have been so kind to me", said Billy.
" It's the least we can do for a stranger in need, if only more people we're more generous and kind", said Miss Crinkle.
It was then, a young girl approached the counter, with a tray containing four glasses of gin, Haggis and Bogus picked up a glass, while Miss Crinkle grabbed the third glass, allowing Billy to take the fourth glass.
" Cheers", said Miss Crinkle.
Billy took a drink from the gin, only to cough and wheeze from the strong taste, and how it made his throat feel dry, causing Miss Crinkle to chuckle.
" You can run cars on that", said Miss Crinkle.
" If only that were true, there'd be less fossil fuels to use up, but we'd have to grow more juniper berries", said Billy.
" So what can I do for you", said Miss Crinkle.
" I'd like to rent a room for the night, but unfortunately, well, I'm short of money", said Billy.
" How short", said Miss Crinkle.
" Below one euro", said Billy.
" 99 cents", Miss Crinkle guessed.
" No, I mean no money at all, but that's about to change, you see, I'm somewhat of an inventor, a magician and a confectioner, and tomorrow I plan on going to the gourmet galleria, to present one of my creations that will leave everyone speechless", said Billy, taking off his hat.
" Prepare to be amazed", Billy then took out what was revealed to be...
" A cup", Miss Crinkle said, looking at the red cup in Billy's hands.
" No, that's not it, bear with me, aha, here we go", Billy then yanked out a bunch of carrots.
The girl who was watching giggled.
" So that's where they were, I don't understand why the rabbit didn't eat them", said Billy.
" Wait, I think I have it", said Billy, pulling out different colored handkerchiefs, yellow, green, orange, blue, red, pink, purple, and a pair of stripped underwear.
" Huh, how did these get in there", said Billy, however he stopped, and patted down his waist, and realized something awkward, eyes widening, he stuffed the hankies and underwear into the hat, chuckling nervously.
" Don't worry Mr Bonka, I can see you're a man with great ingenuity, and I have just the thing for ya", said Miss Crinkle.
Miss Crinkle pulled out a large parchment.
" The entrepreneurial package is what it's called, the price is five euro a night, however, you don't have to pay until 6 PM tomorrow evening", said Miss Crinkle.
" That's wonderful, that should give me more than enough time to earn some money", said Billy.
" Excellent, now, once you sign here, you're good to go", said Miss Crinkle, giving Billy a pen as she placed the parchment onto the counter, revealing it to be a contract.
Removing the lid from the pen, Billy was just about to sign his name, when he saw a girl nearby, trying to get his attention.
" Read the fine print", she whispered.
" Pardon", Billy said.
Miss Crinkle the turned around, and saw the girl, and approach her.
" Thank you Nita, that'll do", She growled, closing the door.
" Hang on, what was that she just said", said Billy.
" What did who say", Miss Crinkle said, trying to act stupid.
" The girl back there, she said 'read the fine print', and by the looks of it, this contract is very long", said Billy, unfolding the contract, revealing it to be very long.
" Oh, that's just Nita, you don't want to listen to her, she's been dropped down a chute as an infant", said Miss Crinkle, folding the contract again.
" How awful, poor girl", said Billy.
" I know, but for the goodness of my heart, I took her in, but sadly the damage is done, she now sees danger and conspiracies anywhere, left in the nature of superstition, she's become paranoid, but in all fairness, who could blame her, such wickedness hiding among the crowd, how hard it is these days to tell the good eggs from the bad eggs", said Miss Crinkle.
" I see", said Billy.
" But if you want, you can check the contract, before signing, just your standard terms and conditions", said Miss Crinkle, thinking Billy wouldn't bother wasting his time looking at it.
" Well, in that case, I would like to have a look", said Billy, looking into the contract.
Miss Crinkle turned to her brothers, and they slowly approached Billy, only for Billy to turn to Miss Crinkle and say.
" Well, that should be it, all in order", said Billy.
" Wait, really", said Miss Crinkle, as her brothers hid their clubs behind their backs.
" Well, in that case, welcome to Crinkle's", said Miss Crinkle, after Billy signed his name onto the contract.
Little did he know, it was a huge mistake, he'll soon regret.
" It's just up these stairs, across the hall", said Miss Crinkle, leading Billy to his room, up some stairs, until they came across a small room.
" There's a bar of soap, lavender scented, and a mint on the pillow", said Miss Crinkle.
" Thank you Miss Crinkle", said Billy.
Once Billy entered the room, and the door closed, Miss Crinkle turned around, to look for 'Nita', as she has a bone to pick.
" Oh Nita", Miss Crinkle called out in a sing song tone.
" Yes Miss Crinkle", said Nita, knowing if she hid would just anger Miss Crinkle even further.
" I've been looking for you", said Miss Crinkle.
" What do you want", Nita said.
" I wanna teach you a lesson you little wart", growled Miss Crinkle as she grabbed Nita by the hair, causing the girl to yelp.
" Ow, what did I do", cried Nita.
" YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID", growled Miss Crinkle.
Miss Crinkle then threw Nita inside a bird coop, and growled threateningly.
" If you ever interfere with my business again, you'll locked up in here all week without food, do I make myself clear".
" Y-yes Miss Crinkle, sorry Miss Crinkle", said Nita.
" I should think so to", growled Miss Crinkle.
She then closed the door, leaving Nita all alone in the dark.
The next morning, Billy left the wash house, on his way to the Gourmet Galleria.
Billy began walking past some houses, when he noticed a maiden tiredly carrying crates of empty milk bottles into a cart.
He approached her, putting down his bag and cane, " Need some help".
" That's very kind of you, but, I'm nearly done, thankfully I have the day off in a couple of days", said the maiden.
" That must be very tiring to do", said Billy.
" If you think that's bad, I have to get up every morning at two o'clock just so I can head to the barn where the cows are kept, and milk them, before dawn, and then afterwards, I have to deliver them all across town, as well as collecting any empty bottles, to send to the wash house, to be washed, sanitized, rinsed and polished so they can be reused again", said the maiden.
" That must suck", said Billy.
" I never even wanted to be a milk maid, do you want to know what I truly wanted to be", said the milk maid.
" What", said Billy.
" A singer, and a dancer, I want to perform, have my name in lights, shining in capital letters, B-E-S-S-I-E", said the milk maid.
" Is your name Bessie", said Billy.
" How'd you guess", Bessie said, sarcastically.
" Just a hunch", Billy responded.
" What about you, what's your name", said Bessie.
" Billy, mam, Billy Bonka", said Billy.
" You're not from around here are you, are you a newbie", said Bessie.
" No, I'm a Libra", Billy answered.
" I mean, are you new from around here", said Bessie.
" Yes, I just arrived yesterday after leaving a ship", said Billy.
" Ship, you mean, are you a sailor", said Bessie.
" Well, I've spent seven years out at sea, spending 93% of that time on a ship, 6% of it on land, 4% in hotel rooms and inns, and 2% on a hot air balloon", said Billy.
" That doesn't make sense, in total that's only 105%", said Bessie.
" Well as I've spent most of my time the last decade on the ocean, then I guess I am a sailor", said Billy.
" You know", Bessie then leaned back on the wagon, looking at Billy seductively, " I have a thing for sailors".
" That's uh, good to know..", Billy said.
" So where are you off to", she said.
" The gourmet galleria", said Billy.
" Oh, that's where all the fanciest of stuff it, the fancy dresses, jewelry, footwear, hats", said Bessie.
" Confections", said Billy.
" So how about you, any reason for going there", said Bessie.
" To seek my fortune, and become a confectioner myself", said Billy.
" Ain't that fascinating", said Bessie, approaching Billy, placing both hands on his shoulders.
Billy then placed a toffee inside Bessie's mouth, who swallowed it, and coming to realization.
" What was that", said Bessie.
" I call it Tempt Toffee, it's to help overcome temptation", said Billy, taking a bite of a piece of toffee himself.
" That was pretty delicious, what else do you make", said Bessie.
" I'm heading to the gourmet galleria to show off a good one of mine, why don't you tag along", said Billy.
" I'd love to, but I have so much work to do, maybe a different time", said Bessie.
Billy then left for town, and Bessie watched him go.
She turned around and realized something.
" He didn't come out of Miss Crinkles wash house didn't he, and I hope he didn't sign the entrepreneurial package contract", Bessie thought.
Billy stood in the center of the city, opening his carpet bag, he pulls out a large board, laying it flat, four legs sprouted out from the corners, turning the board, into a table.
He then places three bottles of lemonade onto the table, as well as a tub of his made ice-cream, with some marshmallows, cherries, and bottles of syrup.
Once he was ready, he called out to the audience, raising his hands, snapping his fingers, sparks flying out.
" LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE GOURMET GALLERIA", shouted Billy.
" My name is Billy Bonka", he said, introducing himself.
" And I have traveled around the world, for seven years, gathering ingredients, perfecting my work, and I have quite an interesting treat to show you all, so settle up, and listen down", said Billy, only to realize what he just said, " Nope, strike that, reverse it".
The audience all gathered, interested in what this man has to say.
" Ice cream of so many different flavors, and to wash it all down, how about a nice drink of my own favorite brew, fizzy lifting lemonade", said Billy.
In the jungles of Fiji
there's this sweet old lemon tree,
with lemons ripe and
makes you hyped to
have a taste of three.
And so I pinched a few,
and made myself a brew,
of Billy Bonka's lemonade
for me to give to you.
Meanwhile in three separate buildings, three men looked through three different windows, curious to see what all the commotion was about.
One of them was overweight, and has a face of a pig, and was drinking a cup of chocolate milk, the second one was short, about four feet, and the third one was lean and scary looking.
So with my lemonade,
you'll floating round all day,
give it a try
and you will fly
each and every way.
The beverage is sweet,
that it just can't be beat,
come buy yourselves a bottle
and you will be in for a treat.
The three men had the same concerned expression, meanwhile the crowd got even more interested to try out the lemonade.
Well there's lemonade,
and there's lemonade,
but only Bonka's type
brings music like a serenade.
Grab your money,
do not daydream,
come and buy
some Bonka Ice-cream,
come now I insist.
You've never had
ice-cream like this,
No you've never
had ice-cream like this.
The crowd applauded and cheered.
Meanwhile, the scary looking man from one of the window's decided he's seen enough, turned to his secretary, and asked her to call the police, before leaving the room, meanwhile the other two men also left their offices.
Outside, Billy bowed to the audience, thankful for their applause.
" Well, who wants to try some", said Billy.
Before anyone in the crowd could say anything, one voice called out.
" We will".
Billy Bonka turned to see three men approaching him, the crowd all stepped back realizing who they were.
" Terrence Trufflesnout", Billy said as he saw the first one, who was overweight, and with a face that almost looks like the snout of a pig, wearing a brown suit.
" Francis Finnywig", Billy then said as he turned to the second man, who was short, about 4 feet, wearing a grey suit.
And finally Billy turned to the third and final man, who looked tall, and quite possibly the most scary looking person in town, wearing a black suit.
" Salazar Snakesworth", Billy finished.
" It is finally an honor to meet you three at last, ever since I ahh", Billy then wince after accepting a handshake from Snakesworth, the latter having a really tight grip, nearly breaking the formers palm.
" Don't mind the pain, it's a business handshake, it means I mean business", said Snakesworth letting go.
" Okay, I can see that", said Billy, holding his wrist in pain.
" So I hear you're a confectioner yourself", said Snakesworth.
" Oh, uh, yeah, I was just...", Billy was cut off.
" Not need to say anything, let us try this ice-cream for ourselves", said Snakesworth.
" Sure", said Billy, handing each of the three, a cup of ice-cream, and a spoon.
The three men took took a spoonful, and had a taste, only for their eyes to widen.
" The ice-cream, tastes unusual, not just that, but, the marshmallows taste unusual as well", said Snakesworth.
" Correct, they're harvested from the mallow marshes of Egypt", said Billy.
" The syrup that you use, it's caramel, but it's salted caramel", Finnywig.
" My own made salted caramel, caramel salted from the salty Pacific oceans of Australia, or is that the Atlantic", said Billy.
" And the cherry on top", said Trufflesnout, plopping the cherry into his mouth.
" Picked from the cherry pickers of the imperial gardens of China", said Billy.
" Mr Bonka", Snakesworth called out.
" Yes", said Billy.
" I believe I speak for all three of us, that after working so many years in this business, out of all the ice-cream I have tasted, this one had to be, without a doubt, 100%, the absolute, worst", said Snakesworth.
While the crowd gasped in shock, Billy cheered to everyone.
" You hear that everyone, an endorsement from Mr Sna... wait a minute, the worst", Billy said, coming to realization of what Mr Snakesworth just said.
" We may be the three fiercest of rivals, me and my two comrades, but, if there's one thing the three of us will gladly agree on, and it's that a good ice-cream should be simple", said Snakesworth.
" Whereas what you've made, it's just...", Finnywig started.
"...absolutely weird", Trufflesnout finished.
" Well, I guess if you hate my ice-cream so much, I suppose you need a drink to wash the taste out of your mouth", said Billy, holding out three lemonade bottles.
" Indeed we do", said Snakesworth, as he and his comrades each snatched a bottle from Billy's hands, and took a drink from them.
" And if you three think my ice-cream is weird, you are definitely going to hate what happens next", said Billy.
" What are you talking about", said Snakesworth, only to find himself lifted off the ground, Trufflesnout and Finnywig following shortly after.
" What in the blazes is happening", shouted Trufflesnout.
" You three have just consumed a brew that I have made, and I call it Fizzy Lifting Lemonade, it fills you up with gas, and lifts you off the ground", said Billy.
" We're going to float in space", shrieked Trufflesnout in panic.
" You won't, above you I can see a glass ceiling, and saying that as a man, that's weird, also, the process isn't permanent, in about half an hour, the gas will wear off, and exit out of your throats", said Billy.
" You mean we're going to burp to lower ourselves to the ground", exclaimed Finnywig.
" You are out of mind Bonka, who in their right mind wants a beverage that makes you fly", shouted Snakesworth.
" Well, there's only one way to find out", said Billy.
He then started pulling out dozens of bottles, and placed them on the table, and then he took out a large jar, and placed it on the table, with the bottles.
" Who wants a Fizzy Lifting Lemonade, for only 50 cents a bottle", said Billy.
The crowd cheered, and started gathering, placing a handful of coin into Billy's jar as they then consumed the beverage, and started floating.
" Keep the change", a woman said, placing a 5 euro note into Billy's hand before she floated up.
" Thank you Miss, enjoy your flight", said Billy, placing the five euro note into his pocket.
Meanwhile, Nitta, who saw the ordeal, was astounded by what she witness, Billy noticed her, and tipped his hat to her, while she waved back, when suddenly, the police arrived.
" Nothing to see here, just a bunch of people defying the laws of gravity", said the chief, he then went past Nita telling her, " Beat it kid".
Nita left the area, worried for Billy.
The chiefs partner, approached Billy.
" It's just the side effects of the fizzy lifting lemonade, but it doesn't last long, one burp and they'll slowly lower back down again, it's perfectly safe", said Billy.
" We've been getting complaints that you've been disrupting the trade of other businesses, I'm afraid I'm going to confiscate your earnings", said the officer.
The chief then took the jar of money Billy was holding onto.
" Wait, hang on", Billy exclaimed.
" Don't worry about it, it'll go to a good place, an orphanage or some sort", the chief said.
" Rules is rules I'm afraid", said the partner.
While the police officers left to bring down everyone who's floated up, Billy placed his hand into his pocket, glad that he still has the five euro note, from that kind lady who told him to keep the change, at least he has enough money to pay off for last night at Miss Crinkles, he's going to try and find a way to make more.
At twelve noon, Billy arrived back at Miss Crinkle's wash house, after a devastating failed attempt at the Gourmet Galleria.
" Back so soon, I take it your business didn't go so well", said Miss Crinkle.
" I'll say bittersweet, sweet as in my customers loved my brew, bitter as in my profits confiscated", said Billy.
" You still have six hours until the deadline for you rent", said Miss Crinkle.
" But do not worry, I do have five euro for last night, as it said in the contract, tomorrow, I'll look for a job, and see if I can make some more money", said Billy, handing Miss Crinkle the five euro note.
" Well, that's just for the room, during the last 15 hours you were here, there were a few extras", said Miss Crinkle.
" Extra's", said Billy.
" Well, first off there's the electricity then there's the water, there's also the gin that I gave you last night, and that time you warmed yourself by the fire, there's also the walking upstairs fee and walking downstairs fee, and that's per step, as well as getting through the door, using the blankets and pillows, and there's also the mini bar", said Miss Crinkle.
" Wait, there's a mini bar", said Billy.
" A mini bar of soap, near the sink, you used that didn't you", said Miss Crinkle.
" N-no", stuttered Billy.
" I don't believe you, that stutter says otherwise, and if we add all that together, your debt is now 1,000 euro", said Miss Crinkle.
" What, you're joking", said Billy.
" It's all in the fine print", said Miss Crinkle.
" Isn't it technically 995 euro, I paid off five already", said Billy.
" True but no matter, you're still in a huge debt regardless, to pay it off, how about working in my wash house, to work the debt off, for every hour you work, one penny will be taken off your debt", said Miss Crinkle.
" That means I have to work 99,500 hours", said Billy.
" As you will be working 14 hours a day, seven days a week, every week, your debt will be paid off in exactly nineteen years, six months, one week, two days and two hours", said Miss Crinkle.
She then pushed Billy back, and he fell down what looked like a laundry chute, he screamed as he went tumbling until he found himself in a large basket, filled with dirty laundry.
Climbing out of the basket, Billy turned to see a group of people looking at him, two in particular approached him.
" You must be Mr Bonka", said the male worker.
" You know my name", said Billy.
" I am Conrad Cod, and this is Gillian Green, we as well as the others failed to read the fine print of that contract, we all made the same mistake, and have to pay the price", said Mr Cod.
" Every morning we all arrive here at eight o'clock in the morning to begin work, for every minute we are late, they'll add an extra euro to our debt, and we remain in here, day in, day out, until ten o'clock at night, it's noon now, so you'll only be here for another ten more hours today", said Miss Green.
" There's got to be a way out", Billy muttered, looking around.
" I know what you're thinking, and no, there's no way out, we've all tried to escape ourselves, it's no use, the windows are nailed shut, wooden planks surrounding them, the dog, nibbles, is guarding the door upstairs, and even if you get past the dog, there's still Haggis and Bogus, if they catch you trying to escape, they'll make you regret doing so, and even if you do get past them, there's still the contract, and the roll call", said Cod.
" Roll call", said Billy.
" Every morning at eight, and every night at ten, Haggis or Bogus will do a roll call, to make sure we're all accounted for, if you miss roll call, Miss Crinkle and her brothers will be searching the place to make sure you haven't run away, and once they're certain you've escaped, they'll call the police, and will have them come looking for you and bringing you back here, and Miss Crinkle will add another hundred euro to your debt for the inconvenience", said Mr Cod.
Mr Cod then grabbed a few bottles, and threw them into a large barrel of warm water.
" First you grab yourself
a bottle,
with a grasp or grip
or throttle...", Mr Cod sang.
" Scrub scrub", the ensemble sang.
Miss Green also started pouring the bottles into the water.
" Then you rinse it
in the water,
filled with soap just
by a quarter", Miss Green sang.
" Scrub scrub", the ensemble sang again.
Mr Cod and Miss green then grabbed a pair of brushes, and put them into the bottle.
" Then you grab
yourself a brush,
and stick it in,
no need to rush", Mr Cod sang.
" Scrub scrub".
Once finished, they moved to the next bit, drying and polishing.
" And when we sing this song,
the day is not so long", Miss Green sang.
" Scrub scrub".
" But don't get your hopes up, the day's still long regardless", said Mr Cod.
Approaching the next bit, Billy, Miss Green and Mr Cod began polishing and drying the bottles.
" Got to give them
next a polish,
any stains
we must abolish", sang Mr Cod.
" Rub rub", sang the ensemble.
Once finished, they began to stack the clean bottles in crates.
" Got to do it
like they told us,
or they'll scold us
and withhold our...", Sang Miss Green.
" Grub grub", sang the ensemble, finishing Miss Green's sentence.
Once finished they begin again, with the next lot of dirty bottles to, soak, wash, rinse, dry, polish, and put away.
" We all signed the bottom line,
now we have to do our time,
scrub scrub", sang both Miss Green and Mr Cod, and they, Billy, and all the other workers lined up when the clock struck ten that night, and Miss Crinkle, Haggis and Bogus finished role call.
" And if you don't agree", Miss Crinkle said.
" See clause 6", said Haggis.
" Section 9A", said Bogus.
" Paragraph 17", said Haggis.
" Part E", said Miss Crinkle.
" Which says", said Bogus.
" SCRUB SCRUB".
Billy entered in his new room, where he'll be staying every night for the next two decades, it was all dusty, and the lights kept flickering.
" Ten hours down, nineteen years, six months, one week, one day and six hours to go before I'm out of debt", said Billy.
He then hears a knocking sound, and he turned to see Nita approaching him.
" Room service", said Nita.
" You're the girl who warned me about the contract", said Billy.
" At first I thought you didn't hear me, but, if you heard me, why didn't you read the fine print", said Nita.
" I did, well at least I tried to, these glasses aren't as good as they used to be", said Billy.
" Why didn't you buy new ones, or got the old ones fixed", said Nita.
" I may have spent the last seven years mostly at sea, but even I am aware that finding a cheap pair of glasses is hard to come by", said Billy.
" At least you only have to spend twenty years here, I overheard what Miss Crinkle said to you this afternoon, you owe her 1,000 euro do you not", said Nita.
" I actually owe her 995 euro, well, actually, it's now 994 euro and 90 pence", said Billy.
" Compared to me you're lucky, I have 3,000 euro in debt, and counting, I'm expecting myself to be here for at least 60 years, but by the looks of it, I'll probably be stuck in here for the rest of my life", said Nita.
" I thought Miss Crinkle took you in out of the goodness of her heart", said Billy.
" And you still believe that, Miss Crinkle is the kind of person who'll never do anything for anyone, unless something was in it for her", said Nita.
" What a monster, a witch", said Billy.
" That's how it works in the world, the greedy beat the needy", said Nita.
" Well, at least I still have my carpet bag, and other accessories, as well as a bed, well old rotten mattress with thin blankets and no pillow, and a table, and hopefully food, she's not going to starve us is she", said Billy.
" Of course she wouldn't, not while we're still in debt, for breakfast every morning, you'll be sent oatmeal, and every night for dinner, you'll be sent fish heads, potato peelings and cabbage broth", said Nita.
" During my time out at sea, I've been eating nothing but gruel, hardtack and table scraps", said Billy, he then pulled out his carpet bag and placed it onto the table.
" Um, what exactly are you doing, if you don't mind me asking", said Nita.
Billy then turned to Nita, " I'm making ice-cream of course, what do you fancy, chocolate, strawberry, peppermint, or would you prefer something nutty, or absolutely dotty".
" I'm not sure, I've never had ice-cream before", said Nita.
" Wait, what, not one ice-cream", said Billy.
" No", said Nita.
" Well, lucky for you Nita, that's about to change", said Billy, as he opened his carpet bag, and then he pulled out a small mixing vat, and a small container of milk, and a mixing spoon.
" Incredible", said Nita.
" But first things first, health and safety", said Billy, pulling out a bottle of hand sanitizer, applying some onto his hands, before rubbing it.
" Now, which one should I make", said Mr Bonka, only to snap his fingers, " I know, Solar Cumulus".
" Solar Cumulus", Nita said, confused.
" Yeah", said Billy, pulling out two bottles, one containing blue liquid, another containing gold.
" Why do you call it that, is it because the ice cream is so soft, it feels like you're eating out of a cloud, and the liquid sunshine gives you that glowing feeling called hope, and lights the dark path of despair", said Nita.
" Kind of, but, I call it that, because it's made out of condensed storm clouds...", said Mr Bonka, showing the blue bottle, and then he showed the gold bottle before finishing, "... and liquid sunshine".
He then pours the condensed storm clouds into the vat, and started mixing it.
" Did you always wanted to make ice-cream", said Nita.
" Honestly, it's not just that, I always wanted to be a magician, ever since I was a little kid, as well as an inventor my goal was inspired by three great men", said Billy.
" First there was Timothee the Terrific, he was a magician, part of a circus that came to my town once, and he inspired me to show off my own illusions after volunteering as his assistant during one of his performances, later that night, he was so intrigued by my own magic tricks that he asked me if I wanted to come along with him on tour, as an assistant, however I turned it down, being too young at the time, but then he gave me this", said Billy, holding out a purple card, showing white numbers.
" He told me to give him a call in case I changed my mind, a great man he was, I almost suspected him to be egotistical and conceited like those stereotypical magicians you see on the screens, but nope, stereotypes aren't a monopoly on the truth", said Billy.
" Then there was Johnny, the inventor, one day there was a convention in my hometown, while I was practicing my magic tricks, I attended one day to see who wins, there were so many contraptions made, Johnny's looked amazing", said Billy.
" What is it", said Nita.
" A machine that cleans and dries dirty clothes by itself in minutes, I was intrigued by it, however, before he could test it, I discovered a few errors, and warned him about it, the shocked look in his face when he discovered I was right, and how much of a disaster it would've been if he didn't listen to me, the errors were fixed, and when he presented his invention, the judge awarded him first place, showing his appreciation, Johnny gave me the original blue prints for his machine, hoping I become an inventor myself", said Billy.
" However, since I wanted to become a magician as well, I was at a bit of a dilemma, because since that day at the convention, I also wanted to become an inventor, back then I believed I had to chose one and let that be the end of it, but then I discovered why choose one", said Billy.
" And finally, Gene the confectioner, he used to be a head cook himself, and then he retired, and worked at my local ice-cream parlor, I remembered those old days, once a week, I would save up to get a small cup of ice-cream", said Billy.
" During those days, I mostly did newspaper routes, shoe polishing and helping clean up shops, the taste and texture of the ice cream was amazing, I would have thoughts of making my own type, but then that would mean giving up my previous dreams, of being an inventor and a magician, Gene noticed my worries one day, and asked what the problem was, so I told him about it, and then he said, why choose one, why not be all three", said Billy.
" He also told me everything that happened in this world started with a dream, before everyone else could see it, somebody had to believe in it, like the telephone, automobiles, locomotives, the light bulb, before they were invented, most people laughed and mocked at the idea of something like that existing, you can just imagine the look on most of their faces, if they somehow came back to life and realize just how wrong they were", said Billy.
" He must've been a great man", said Nita.
" Yeah, he was", Billy said, he then look down, " One day he got sick, and months later passed on, it was then I decided that when I got older, I will run my own ice-cream shop, it was him that told me about the Gourmet Galleria".
" How old are you", asked Nita.
" 25", Billy answered.
" Why didn't you come sooner", said Nita.
" I knew that to impress and amaze the customers, I had to make something unique, and I also knew that I won't be able to find anything in my home town to make my ice-cream unusual, so at 18, I boarded on a ship, as an assistant to the ship's cook, and every voyage, every trip, at every country, I discovered new ingredients, and harvested them", said Billy.
" At 21, the cook left, and I took over, and during those last four years, it was a blast, life on the sea was great, and I will miss it, but, I had to leave, to begin my dream as a confectionary", said Billy.
Afterwards, the ice-cream was ready, and was poured into a small cup, and Billy poured some liquid Sunshine, as it drizzled onto the ice-cream, like a syrup.
And finally, after pulling out a spoon, he hands the ice-cream to Nita.
" Here, try it", said Billy.
Hesitant, Nita took the spoon, took a scoop of the ice-cream, and plopped it into her mouth.
" So how is it, you don't like it", said Billy, noticing, Nita's look of disappointment.
" No, it's great", said Nita.
" Now it's going to be a more difficult for me each day, now that I've tasted ice-cream for the first time", said Nita.
" Well then, how would you like a life time supply", said Billy.
" A life time supply of ice-cream, what's the catch", said Nita.
" Helping me with my business", said Billy.
" Well there's not much to do while in here", said Nita.
" I know, so maybe you can help me sneak out of here", said Billy.
" You're kidding right", said Nita.
" Only during the daylight hours, after roll call I sneak out, and before ten o'clock at night I'll sneak back in like I never left", said Billy.
" The only way any of us is getting out of here, is either in a body bag, or in a stretcher taken to a van heading to a looney asylum, like the last guy who managed to pay off all his debt, he was way overstressed by the work, saying scrub scrub in his sleep, and once he finally paid off the whole debt, he just snapped, I still remember seeing him with that crazy look in his eyes, twitching, and laughing a little crazily, while still saying scrub scrub, it was scary, and it's sad too, because that guy was really nice, didn't deserve such fate", said Nita.
" Why not help me anyway, you said so yourself, you owe Miss Crinkle 3,000 euro, while I owe her 1,000, I'll give you 75% of the profits, that way we'll both pay off Miss Crinkle at the same time", said Billy.
" You do realize how much trouble we'll get into if we're caught, unless you have a plan", said Nita.
" Does Miss Crinkle enter the wash house during the work hours, or Haggis, or Bogus", said Billy.
" No, the only time we see them is during role call", said Nita.
" How will we sneak past Miss Crinkle, does she or her brothers have any weaknesses", said Billy.
" Well, she does drink that awful gin every morning, and would pass out in her bedroom until dark, she we wouldn't have to worry about, on the other hand, it's Haggis and Bogus you got to watch out for, they guard the exit, if they see you, you're busted, and will expect another hundred euro added to your debt", said Nita.
" What about weaknesses, do they have any", said Billy.
" No, other than them sharing a brain, but they aren't that stupid, even though last year they were head over heels... huh", Nita's eyes widened when she realized something.
" Huh...", Billy asked, wondering what Nita meant by what she said in the end.
" It's nothing", said Nita.
" Okay then", said Billy.
A few seconds later.
" Huh", Nita said again.
" A double 'huh', you know something that could work, every cloud has a silver lining", said Billy.
" Last year, some can-can dancers came here asking for directions, and the two were just smitten, so lovestruck, they could've ditched Miss Crinkles wash house, and do the dancers bidding instead", said Nita.
" So their weakness is feminine beauty", said Billy.
" But where are going to find an attractive female to divert the two away from the launderette", said Nita.
Billy then grabbed a spoonful of the solar cumulus ice-cream, and ate it.
As soon as he did that, the light above him glowed brightly, at the same time, Billy then realized something, " Huh".
" Huh", questioned Nita.
" Huh", Billy said, again.
" A double huh", said Nita.
" I have an idea, good thing I know someone outside the launderette", said Billy.
" Who", said Nita.
" What times it now", said Billy.
" 10:45, why", said Nita.
" Because in about 11 hours or so, our opportunity will arrive", said Billy.
" You mean Bessie", said Nita.
" Oh you know her as well", said Billy.
" She gives me the dirty milk bottles, while I give her the clean ones, we don't just clean dirty laundry, but we also clean and polish dirty bottles, whether it's milk bottles, wine bottles or any other bottle", said Nita.
" I hear she has the day after tomorrow off", said Billy.
" She told me that as well", said Nita.
" I want you to do something for me, tell Bessie to do me a favor, she's also in a bit of a pickle herself, if we get her in on the action, this could benefit for her", said Billy.
" But what about the workhouse, how are you going to convince the other workers to cover for you, who's to say one of them won't rat you out, doing that it could take out some more of their debt, as it's happened several times, whenever someone's able to get past Haggis, Bogus and Nibbles, there's always that one snitch who sells the escapee out", said Nita.
" Well then, it's a good thing I still have Johnny's blueprints", said Billy.
Simon then paused the movie after Theodore tapped him on the shoulder.
" Everything alright Theodore", said Simon.
" Yeah, I just need to use the bathroom real quick", said Theodore.
" Why didn't you go before we started", said Simon.
" I wasn't busting then", said Theodore.
" Actually, I need to go to", said Alvin.
" Me too", said Eleanor.
" And me", said Jeanette.
" I might as well tag along, I still needed to finish powdering my nose", said Brittany.
" Or are you still trying to hide that wart on your foot", said Alvin, only to get kicked in the shin by Brittany.
" Well I guess we can all use a quick break, we're a quarter into the movie anyway", said Simon, he then turned to the audience, " We'll be right back".
And that's it for now, first chapter done, three to go, next chapter will be out tomorrow, until then, see ya.