This should also be known as the chapter where Shaymie refused to shut up and also treated herself to some nice self-indulgence. Hope you lovelies enjoy! ~Shaymie

Molly

Halloween's officially less than a month away, which means that it's officially time to bring out the decorations.

Molly adored the later half of the year. Warm colors were her favorite, and fall fashion had a lot of them. She also loved baking this time of year. Thanksgiving prep gave her joy like no other. The feel of it was just different. Angela and Kasey thought she went a bit overboard with how many pies she made (she always tried to come up with a new recipe for Thanksgiving every year), but they didn't complain when she let them try each and every one so she could get their opinions. Their Thanksgiving tradition is going to feel a bit weird without having Jack around. He might be Kasey's best friend but he also felt like another older brother.

The Sawyers in general just felt like an extension of the family. Kasey told her that the twins basically adopted Jack as their uncle without a second thought, which only made her feel more validated for seeing him as an extra brother. He's been there for everything. How could she not see him that way? Kasey and Jack's friendship was something truly special. They just met one day in kindergarten and have been best friends ever since. She couldn't think of a time without Jack in her life. He was even in a good portion of pictures in their family albums.

I can't wait to see pictures of his baby, Molly thought with a smile, finishing off her tea. Andrew Adam Sawyer, first name after Muffy's father and middle name after the Parker patriarch, was bound to be adorable. All babies were in her opinion. She didn't think there could be anything cuter than watching a baby learn new things. They're just cute, clumsy, chubby blobs. She was embarrassed to admit it but sometimes she wondered what her own children would look like. That was obviously a long way away (her body's still recovering from the damage she'd done to it and it worried her a bit every month she didn't have a period) but it couldn't hurt to dream, could it? Just because her big lifetime dream was forever out of the picture didn't mean that her entire life was over. It didn't hurt to remind herself of that.

Moving here was a nice change of pace. She always used to get caught up in how fast everything was and never took time to herself. Now that she didn't have constant rehearsals, she could dedicate some time to her hobbies. She practiced her photography by taking pictures of the fields and spent hours sitting around with her animals sketching them, but the only time she really got to practice piano was at the bar. She was beginning to regret selling her old keyboard. It may have been a gift from Mr. Jacobs, but it's still a stupidly expensive thing to have to replace. She might have been a bit rash in selling it. She was just eager to cut all ties with him. And even now looking back on how everything went down, she thought about how he could have prevented everything. If he paid more attention to Chelsea, if he'd stood up to her, then maybe...

Thinking about what could have been wouldn't help in the slightest. Besides, she can always save up for another keyboard if she really wanted to. For now she was content with practicing at the bar. It meant that she got to see a lot more of Chase.

Her face warmed at the thought of him. The picnic was a nice surprise. Angela kept calling it a date even though it clearly wasn't. Molly's denial of it being a date didn't stop Angela from going out and buying her an entirely new outfit that felt a bit out of place for a picnic. Julius somehow caught wind of the picnic and came over to do her hair, showing off some fancy new hair curler that didn't use heat. He even gave it to her since the company messed up and sent him two of them. She felt bad for accepting such an expensive gift but he insisted she take it as a thank-you for taking the time to befriend Mira. She didn't think that was something she needed to be thanked for. Then again, who was she to judge? She thanked Chase for being friends with her. But she just gave him some fruit and a goofy note, not a really expensive piece of technology!

She didn't think she and Julius were even that close to begin with. She only really spoke to him when he happened to be visiting his aunt when she came over for tea. Which, now that she thought about it, was quite often. Mira seemed lonely so Molly made sure to stop by whenever she had some free time and wasn't too tired from work. She's seen first-hand how painful losing a spouse could be. Dad never really got over Mom's death. Even Molly could tell that he wasn't really all there most of the time. She didn't doubt that he loved them but there were times when he felt like a shell of a person. It got worse around her birthday and the middle of fall, when Mom started getting worse before...

Molly couldn't help Dad, but she could help Mira just by being around and talking to her.

"...insane, Kasey!"

"Kathy's the insane one! I barely even know her!"

"Maybe if you got out of the house more—!"

Molly could hear Angela and Kasey's bickering before they even came through the door. Unlike before, this was a good kind of bickering. Apparently they sat down and talked things out so she didn't have to worry about awkwardly tense dinners anymore. She walked to the sink to wash out her mug as her siblings burst through the door. Angela held it open for Kasey while he carried in a box of fall decorations he had lying around his house. It's a miracle he didn't leave them in storage back in the city. Molly was a bit disappointed to hear that he wasn't planning on decorating his house but she understood why. He's still adjusting to everything. Kasey's the kind of guy who's slow to accept change. She didn't think that was necessarily bad or anything.

"Did Kathy do something?"

"I don't want to talk about it—" Kasey started to say before Angela cut him off, directing a scowl in his direction.

"Kathy asked our dear brother out on a date and he turned her down because he's 'still getting over Jill,' which is complete bullshit and I think even she knew that."

"I'm not ready to date anyone right now." Kasey's tone grew defensive, his eyes narrowing as he gave Angela a warning look. He was someone else Molly didn't want to end up like Dad. He was dedicating everything he had towards raising his kids which was fine for right now. She just didn't want him to lose himself in the process. He always had a bit of sadness in his eyes when she saw him and instead of dealing with it, he tried to help everyone else.

"Fine, you're not ready to date. I can get that. But then she asked if you wanted to hook up and you still turned her down! Kasey Marcel Parker, you are an idiot." Angela scoffed and sat down at the dining table, plucking an apple from the bowl Molly set in the center earlier. The apple harvest was bigger than they expected so she decided to keep some of the extras. Angela took a moment to examine the apple before taking a crunchy bite. "Kathy's like one of the hottest women around! How could you pass up a night with her? We'd totally be down to watch the kids so you can have some time to yourself."

"I'm just... not all that interested in sex," Kasey mumbled, leaning against the door. Angela looked like she thought that was some kind of blasphemy. "I always had to force myself to do anything with Jill even before shit went bad between us. I think she knew I wasn't into it."

Molly set the mug in the drying rack and dried her hands on the towel hanging from the stove. She wasn't really sure if she could contribute anything to the conversation. The only experience she had was with Selena and that wasn't really anything she could offer advice from. Selena meant it when she said she wanted to teach her a lot. It felt a bit... weird to still be doing things with Selena when she knew she liked Chase. But she liked the way she could make her feel. Now Molly could understand why Angela went out so often to seek out that feeling. Calling it nice would be an understatement. It was incredible, especially after years of bottling up so many of her emotions. She wanted to be like her mother so much that she locked away anything she thought would be out of character. She worried so much about putting on her perfect persona in front of everyone.

It was just nice being able to feel something because she wanted it, not because she was trying to please other people.

"But you were willing to hook up with Lumina even though you had just met her?" Angela asked, raising an eyebrow. Kasey's face flushed as he went to set the box down and started pulling things out. Molly cracked a small smile at the sight of her favorite stuffed pumpkin. Dad bought it from some craft store and it was love at first sight.

"That was a drunk fluke or something. I've never wanted to sleep with anyone else—oh, sorry Molls. You probably don't want to hear this."

"She's 21, Kase. I think she can handle a little sex talk. Besides, she's more grown than you think." Angela gave Molly a wink after saying that. They've both decided that it was best if Kasey didn't know about her deal with Selena. It's none of his business and he didn't need anything else to stress himself out about. He's already having a hard enough time coming to terms with the idea of her being an adult. It scared him. Angela took another loud bite of the apple and turned to Kasey. "Are you telling me you spent ten whole years faking it with Jill?"

"...Yes? No? God, I don't know, Ange. I mean, it was fun at first and it made her happy so I was fine with it. Then I realized she was getting more out of it than I was. I know I should've talked to her about it but I was scared of offending her or something."

"I think faking it in bed is more offensive than telling someone you're not into it. Especially for as long as you did. Not like there's anything you could do about it now, though." Angela shrugged and leaned back in the chair. That seemed to mark the end of the discussion. Molly felt a bit bad about not having anything to say, but all of this was new to her. She's painfully inexperienced and she doubted anything she came up with would be helpful. Kasey seemed like he wanted to drop the subject, anyway.

They got to work decorating the house after Molly prepared some sandwiches. She had a lot of bread to get rid of and luckily Angela and Kasey could eat enough for five of her. She should probably start shifting to pie mode soon. The thought of using crops she grew herself in her pies was exciting. She wanted to go all out for Thanksgiving. Angela's already booked their hotel room in Oak Tree so it's official. They're going to visit Aunt Dee and Fritz. Molly's excited but also just a little bit scared. She hasn't seen them in so long and she wasn't really at her best the last time they saw each other.

Most of the time after Dad's death was a blur. Fritz was an occasional burst of light in her life, when she was willing to let him in. She wouldn't even let Ash in most of the time. Part of her envied Ash because his father was still around. He just refused to speak to him after his parents divorced. Lashing out at him like that would always be one of her biggest regrets, especially considering how easily he forgave her. She felt like she didn't deserve his forgiveness for that. He was just trying to help. Everyone was trying to help and she acted like a spoiled brat, like she was the only person in the world who's ever lost someone. Angela told her that she wasn't a burden but she had to say that. She's her sister.

Angela and Kasey's lives would be simpler if she wasn't so needy. She was a big part of why they stopped getting along in the first place. She put a lot of pressure on Kasey and Angela didn't know how to deal with it. It only made sense for her to not want to come home. Molly didn't want to deal with herself most days. She knew that Angela loved her but she's also aware of how frustrating she was to deal with. It felt like it was always something with her. Anxiety clung to her like a stubborn raincloud. Some days it was hard to hold herself together even when nothing was going on. It was annoying. She hated having such bad nerves.

"Do you think the little rat will listen if you tell him these aren't for him?" Angela asked, hands full of little plastic spiders. They were meant to go in the fake spiderweb Kasey was currently stringing up. Molly looked over at Pretzel, who was currently dozing off in his plush bed. He didn't really mess with anything he wasn't meant to but he also loved eating bugs that wandered into the house, so she wasn't too sure.

She'd like to think he was smart enough to know the spiders were fake...

"Maybe we should put them up higher than normal. Just to be safe," she decided. No matter how much of a genius she thought Pretzel was, at the end of the day he is still a cat. Better safe than sorry.

Kasey still looked deep in thought while they decorated. Angela kept glancing over at him but didn't say anything. Normally she would try to pick his brain a bit. Molly wondered if she was scared of breaking this fragile peace they had. They're getting along now but it certainly isn't perfect. They had over a year of issues between them. That wouldn't just magically go away because Kasey sort-of apologized. Angela refused to accept anything remotely close to the words "I'm sorry" so he had to make a compromise, which was certainly better than nothing. It could be worked on. They needed time to work on it.

Which was why Molly offered to pick the twins up from Marimba Farm so Kasey didn't have to leave. After giving Pretzel a few scratches behind the ear and buttoning up her new favorite cardigan—a gift from Candace, the people in this town are really too kind—she set out on the long but peaceful walk. She's glad she didn't get as winded as she used to making her way around Castanet. Maybe she had the brief time she spent exercising with Angela to thank for that. They've been meaning to get back to their morning jogs for some time but Molly was almost always exhausted after work. She's started to lose most of her afternoons to naps. The afternoons that she didn't sleep through were either spent with Selena or working on tweaking her recipes.

...Was it odd that hooking up with Selena has become a bit of a routine? Back in high school she always thought that her first time would be magical, with someone that she loved. She learned the hard way that life couldn't be the perfect fairytale she wanted it to be. If that was the case, then she would have woken up from the fall like nothing happened. She wouldn't have that ugly scar at the back of her head that she's grateful her hair hid. She would've maybe spent a little bit of time in the hospital and gotten to go right back to ballet. She knew it wasn't something she could do for the rest of her life, and she was fine with that as long as she got to retire gracefully.

But... nothing about what happened was graceful. It was pathetic and ugly. She's been trying to face her feelings more lately so she wasn't afraid to admit to herself that she hated what happened. She didn't realize just how angry it made her until she mentioned it to Chase. She managed to keep her cool and change the subject before she said or did something to ruin the picnic. She didn't want to be a downer when she finally got to see more of Chase's smile. She wasn't quite sure how to describe it, but he felt different that day. More relaxed. He would have probably talked a bit about his family if she asked. She felt selfish because it seemed like they only ever spoke about her issues.

Sometimes she worried that she was using him as a stand-in therapist. She couldn't really speak to Dr. Kane and her appointments have been at a standstill for months now. She hadn't been fully comfortable with the idea of therapy from the start. She only did it because Kasey thought it would help. And it did help at the start, really it did, but it was impossible to talk about the more difficult things over the phone. Therapy was easier before she moved here. She was beginning to wonder if it was even worth paying for if she was just tense the whole time. She's never been comfortable speaking over the phone. Would it be right for her to stop going to therapy, though? She didn't want to upset Kasey—

...Is that a flute?

Molly paused just outside of Chase's house and tilted her head, turning her eyes to his open window. She felt like a bit of a creep just standing there and staring, but it felt like doing anything else would break the spell. She's never seen Chase so... at peace. Or without his hair clips in. His peachy bangs were in his face but he didn't seem bothered by it one bit. And the rest of his hair was beautiful, haphazardly tossed up in a half bun and looking as soft as ever. He mentioned during their picnic that he normally didn't let his hair get this long but he couldn't be bothered to cut it just yet. She hoped he kept it like this a little bit longer. She really liked it.

Standing outside her crush's house listening to him play music was weird, right? She could stop by and say hi after she picked up the kids. But then he might stop playing and she wanted to hear more.

"Aunt Molly!" Mara's tiny little voice brought her out of her trance. She heard the music stop and scurried over to Marimba so it wasn't completely obvious that she was lurking around Chase's house. Hopefully he didn't see her. Molly instinctively started to smile at the sight of her niece. Kasey found some of her old clothes when he was packing up the house and decided to give them to Mara since she liked them. She looked absolutely adorable in Molly's old clothes. It was shocking how much Dad kept from their childhood and how much of it was still in good condition. Gideon also had a ton of Kasey's old clothes. Most of the twins' old wardrobe was designer clothes that they didn't particularly care for but had to wear because of their controlling grandmother.

While Gideon would have kept going until he ran into her legs, Mara stopped in front of her. Molly's smile fell off when she noticed the distressed look on her niece's face. She immediately started checking her over for any injuries (the other kids often forgot how much smaller Mara was than them and could play too rough and bruise her) but there wasn't anything out of place. Craig stormed out of the house before she could ask what was wrong, followed by an angry Anissa holding the hand of a deflated Gideon. Molly could see Ruth and Taylor watching from the open doorway. This didn't seem good. Craig looked so angry it was downright scary.

Mara squeaked and moved her rose-colored headphones from her neck to her ears. Molly should have taken that as a sign of what was to come.

"Where's that brother of yours?" Craig spat out furiously as he stomped over, looking past her shoulder like he was expecting to see Kasey behind her. She frowned, her nerves immediately set on edge.

"He's helping Angie with something. Is... something wrong? Did the kids get into a fight?" Molly gently guided Mara behind her as she spoke. If it wasn't so far, she'd tell her niece to head to the house. She didn't exactly understand Mara's condition but she knew enough to know that Craig's yelling wasn't at all good for her. Hopefully those headphones could work miracles.

Anissa tried to calm Craig down but he completely ignored his daughter as he pointed a finger towards Gideon and practically growled out, "Men shouldn't have on nail polish, let alone little boys. What the hell are you city slickers trying to pull?!"

Oh. Craig's one of those guys.

Add that to the small list of things Molly hated. She despised people like him, guys that spewed out toxic masculinity and bullied anyone who didn't fit into their perfect bubble of what they thought a man should be. It's guys like him that hurt Ash and made him think he'd never be good enough. That he'd never be a real man. It pissed her off like nothing else. Why couldn't people just keep their rotten, outdated opinions to themselves? How are there even people that still think like this?

"With all due respect, sir, it's just nail polish. It doesn't mean a thing. Gideon saw me painting his sister's nails and wanted to do the sam—"

"Like hell it doesn't mean anything! It's a damn rainbow!" Molly felt her hands clench and took a deep breath, trying to will herself to calm down. She can't hit him like she'd hit Chelsea. Anger was still something new to her so she wasn't sure how to deal with it. Her siblings can't save her now so she's on her own.

"First of all," she started, struggling to keep her voice steady and not let her temper get the better of her, "it's not a rainbow. It's a bunch of colors that Gideon liked. Even if it was a rainbow, it still wouldn't mean a thing. I don't know what your problem is but I'd appreciate it if you didn't terrorize my niece and nephew over something as silly as nail polish."

Anissa smoothed down Gideon's hair and whispered something to him, giving his hand a small squeeze. Molly's glad she didn't seem to take after her father in the slightest. Maybe she should try to be friends with Anissa. The other woman was just so pretty that it was kind of intimidating to think about actually speaking to her.

"My problem? Isn't it obvious? I don't want you turning my boy gay!"

"Are you serious?" Molly couldn't stop herself from laughing at how utterly ridiculous Craig sounded. Laughter clearly wasn't the proper response. Craig's face seemed to get ten times redder. She probably shouldn't poke the bear right now but could you blame her? He sounded so... so stupid! She couldn't even understand the logic behind that! But then again, people like Craig never made sense. They just needlessly hated. "You're ridiculous. I could call Kasey if you really want but I can guarantee he won't be as nice as I am right now."

"Mind telling me what you're all doing hanging around my house?" Molly felt nearly all the tension leave her body when Chase exited his house with a familiar scowl on his face. It was purely directed at Craig, though she noticed his eyes softening for just a moment as he glanced over at her. He did that a lot, she's noticed. He could be in the crappiest mood and perk up just a bit when he saw her. It always did funny things to her, like make her heart skip a couple beats or make her stomach do flips.

She definitely had it bad.

"None of your damn business!" Craig glared back at Chase. Molly took an anxious step back towards the house. Something about that was the final straw for Mara. The poor girl burst into tears, shaking her head and clamping her tiny hands over her headphones. Now it's gone too far. All of this over some nail polish? Gideon tugged his hand from Anissa's grip and ran over, giving Craig the meanest glare Molly's ever seen from a four year-old.

"Leave us alone, you... you asshole! I'm gonna tell my daddy to beat you up for making Rosie cry!"

Molly blinked in stunned silence. She wasn't sure if she wanted to scold Gideon or praise him for standing up for his sister. Should she leave it to Kasey? No, that might make Gideon think he can get away with things around her. She opened her mouth to respond, only to get distracted by Chase... laughing? He burst out into laughter. Real, serious laughter, nothing like the little chuckles he'd let out when Luke stumbled into walls when he drank too much. Gideon's glare faltered as he looked over at Chase in confusion. He let out a little huff and walked over to Mara, doing his best to comfort her. Molly smiled. Maybe she could let it go just this once.

"I'm so sorry about my father," Anissa apologized, cutting off whatever Craig was about to say with a sharp glare. She hauled him off towards their house with a promise to have a nice, long talk with him about his behavior. Molly shuddered at the look of hatred in Craig's eyes as he left. Maybe she should suggest the twins have their playdates at her house from now on. She just hoped Kasey didn't kill Craig before then. She doubted telling him about this would end well. He may have a slow temper but there were some things that could set him off instantly. Mara and Gideon were at the top of his list of priorities.

Chase whistled lowly and gave the twins a side-glance. Mara was quieting down thanks to Gideon putting on his big brother hat and comforting her. He really did take after Kasey in the best way. She was so occupied with checking over the kids that she almost didn't notice Chase speak up.

"Wanna help me really piss Craig off?"

Calm down, Molly. You're just... holding Chase's hand.

It turned out that his big idea for messing with Craig was painting his nails. He asked her to help him with it since he hasn't painted his nails since high school. She wondered if it's also been that long since he's worn any piercings. His ears were pierced but he never wore anything. She'd probably die if he had any cool piercings like Angela. Practically everyone she knew told her that she was obvious when she had a crush, but she didn't think so. If she was then Chase would have called her on it. He wouldn't let her live it down.

"It's a good thing Angie had some nail polish left, huh? I don't think pastels suit you much." Angela hasn't painted her nails for a while now. She couldn't stop picking at the polish and couldn't really be bothered to deal with the upkeep. Molly's tongue poked out from the corner of her mouth as she focused on applying the black polish to Chase's nails. Red, black, and dark blue were the only colors Angela had, and she was currently applying the blue to Luke's nails at the dining table. He wanted in after hearing what they were doing. Apparently he thought wearing nail polish would make him cool.

"Why do you enjoy such irritatingly bright colors anyway?" Chase asked, looking towards the rack where Molly kept her aprons. Angela thought it was silly to have a collection of aprons but she liked choices. His cheeks looked flushed, though she couldn't pin down why. It's not too warm in the house. "Are you trying to replace the sun? It's blinding looking at you sometimes."

"Dad always told me that I look good in them. He said I reminded him of Mom, and I always wanted to be like her..." Or did I just want Dad's approval?

That's a whole can of worms she didn't want to open up right now. She cleared her throat.

"And Ash always told me that earthy tones made my eyes stand out," Molly murmured, pulling Chase's hand a bit closer so she could get a better look at his pinky. She heard him take in a sharp breath and looked up at him. Was his face... pinker than before? Angela let out a short laugh from her seat across the room that only served to confuse Molly further. She chose to ignore it. Maybe Luke just made a face at Angela that she happened to miss. He was always doing things like that to make her smile.

"Why, uh... Why did you and him break up?"

Oh. She wasn't expecting Chase of all people to ask about that. She's surprised Maya hasn't asked about it yet. Molly carefully finished applying the second coat to Chase's pinky and set his hand on the table.

"We didn't end on bad terms or anything, if that's what you were wondering. Things were just a bit complicated and confusing after the accident and I needed time to myself to recover." She grabbed Chase's other hand so she could start on it. She didn't want to talk about how Ash's worry over her grew nearly obsessive because he blamed himself, or how much she worried that she broke his heart. Those days in general were still painful to think about. She wished Ash could have been there every step of the way but she could tell how much he hated seeing her in the hospital. It was better for both of them that she reached out after she got a bit better. She didn't want him destroying himself for her mistake.

"...Sorry." She looked up at Chase with a frown, confused as to what he was apologizing for. "Feels like every time we hang out, you end up talking about some heavy shit."

That did seem to be a pattern, huh?

"Meanwhile you barely ever share things about yourself. Maybe I should try to be more like you. It would be nice to have some secrets." Chase scoffed and leaned back in his seat, careful to keep his hand still.

"Trust me, Freckles, you don't want to be like me."