Erin decided to not only drive Jay to the district, but to walk him inside too. She unbuckles the baby from her car seat and scoops her up into her arms, "You don't have to walk me inside. I'm old enough to cross the street by myself." She looks at him from over the baby's head, chuckling in a low murmur before leading them across the street and up the stairs of the precinct. Emma lays chest to chest against her, and Erin whispers her thanks to the officer that holds the door open for them.
Jay jogs to catch up, "You know you can't go upstairs unless I buzz you in."
"…or Platt could have let me in. I had options."
"Hey Er," he catches up to her, tugging her elbow to turn her around, "I'm going to be okay, I promise. And if I'm not, I'll call you." His hand gravitates from her elbow to her hand, squeezing it reassuringly before stepping forward to give her a peck.
"I believe you and I'll take you for your word," he senses a but and seconds later he hears it, "but now that I'm here, I feel like I have to show my face, at least to say hi. My dad would kill me if he knew we were right here and I didn't come see him especially because I have the baby with me, he doesn't think he sees her enough though I keep reminding him that he's capable of driving while she's not so the ball's in his court."
Jay nods, knowing full well she's right, and besides, Voight is always in a lousy mood and maybe seeing Emma will lessen the blow he'll receive for defying his orders and coming in. He doesn't say another word, instead he scans his hand to unlock the gate preventing them from going upstairs. He shuts it behind him and his hand hovers behind Erin's lower back, guiding her up and counting down the steps since she couldn't see them. With Emma laying directly against her chest, and the control of her neck getting stronger and stronger, she occasionally holds her head up, obscuring Erin's view and to ensure neither one of them falls -or at least if they did, he'd take the brunt of it- he walks partially behind them.
"Malik Hill's alibi is airtight; he was at the gym an hour before Milah was killed, he checked in on the app which GPS has him in the gym for an hour, and I looked at the surveillance footage, he was there the whole time and realistically speaking, he wouldn't have made it from the gym to the office in the time span the coroner said Milah died in." Atwater updates the team on one of the therapists.
"The medical examiner has a time of death already?" Jay's voice alerts the team to his presence, "when did that come in?"
"…about an hour ago. Sarge over here," Ruzek thumbed in Voight's direction as if no one would know who he's talking about, "made a call. The autopsy isn't complete, probably won't be until tomorrow but we at least got a time frame. Body decomp puts the time of death between nine and midnight factoring in the drop of temperature at night." Their sergeant rolled his eyes unimpressed.
"What are you doing here?" He frowns, the lines on his forehead creasing when he averts his eyes to Erin, "but more importantly, what are you doing here?"
"I was the Uber driver, figured since I was here I'd come in and say hi."
Hank simply huffs, showing no indication about how he feels about their unexpected arrival. He grumbles under his breath and moves to relieve Emma from her arms. It's interesting, he's such a mean and grumpy older man, too stubborn to retire with a hardened exterior based off nature and nurture but for some reason when Emma's in his arms, it softens him up. No one questions it. He turns back to the board, noticing a checkmark placed beside Malik's alibi and he turns to the rest of his team, "Next."
"I verified Dennis Howard's alibi, he was at a dance recital for his granddaughter and went out to eat with family afterwards to celebrate. Waitstaff remembered him and family could provide photo evidence. His is also airtight," Olinsky confirmed.
A lot had been accomplished in the three hours -time had flown- since he was sent home. Voight had divided the team, sending them out into the town to check on alibis. Jay starts to feel better knowing that Voight was true to his word, they're working, nothing slowed down just because he wasn't present. An identical check mark appeared next to Dennis's name, which puts them closer and further away from finding the person responsible. Jay pulls out his seat, silently offering it to Erin who quietly observes the underworkings of an investigation. She doesn't speak, just silently studies the board as Dawson steps forward, tapping the next photo in the line up, "Nina Delgado says she was at home all night, battling the flu, and hadn't been in the office in the last three days. I reached out to Victoria and she confirmed."
"That alibi still isn't as airtight as the others, Was anyone there with her?"
"She says no but her girlfriend did swing by and bring her some soup around eight but she didn't stay, says she didn't want to get her girlfriend sick."
"That alibi won't hold," Voight mutters, bouncing the baby in his arms.
"No, but with how sick she looked, it's no way she killed Milah and didn't leave behind some type of trace evidence. I'm waiting to hear back from the lab."
"Did you mask up?" Jay asks, and while one might take it as a joke, his kid was in the room and the last thing he needed was for her to get sick.
"Yeah definitely, and she did too, the last thing I need is for my own kiddos to be sick, their mom would probably force me to stay home if I'm the one that triggered it."
Erin continues to quietly stare at the board, she's so quiet that if not for Emma's cooing, they'd forget she was here. Jay sees she makes no move to leave, appearing comfortable with remaining where she's at, and if Voight wasn't distracted with dividing his attention between the baby in his arms and snapping his fingers at Mouse for the next update, he'd probably be sending her home.
"Michelle Fowler was at home with her husband and three kids. All confirmed and the ring camera on her door showed that once she got home, she never left."
Voight presses his lips against the baby's forehead, turning to Ruzek with a pleading look on his face, "And Victoria? Tell me you have something."
"Sorry sarge," his words deflate Voight's shoulders, "Victoria Holt was out with two of her roommates. Bartender confirmed her presence and she didn't leave until midnight. All the staff is cleared. That leaves her clients."
"…and people in her personal life." Jay chimes in, "when the death notification was done, did anyone mention any loved ones? Any concerning clients?"
"No, family said she didn't talk about work. Her son couldn't give us much but we do know she has an ex-husband. Son says his dad lives out of state, Kentucky, but that doesn't mean he couldn't have come to town to kill his ex-wife."
For the first time since she got here, Erin rose to her feet. She silenced the chatter around her as she moved closer to the whiteboard. She spots the crime scene photos, and to an outsider, it may be hard to digest but in her line of work, she's come across her fair share of crime scenes. She reads the comments, written in marker scribbled around the photos, "No cameras," she whispered. Jay stood close enough to hear.
"They were down from the storm."
Erin thumbs her lip as she turns to face her dad, "either the person that killed Milah is the luckiest person in the world or they knew about those cameras."
Voight shifts the baby, "And no one is that lucky. Whoever killed her frequented that street. Did the staff know about the cameras?"
"All the businesses on the block did." Atwater answered, "and the staff has solid alibis."
"It has to be a client," Jay mumbles only to repeat himself, "it has to be a client!"
"Jay-"
"I know we have to get a warrant to get those files but hear me out. They frequented the street because they frequented the business. If it was a store owner, no one would run the risk of killing her so close to where they are, or at least they wouldn't leave her that close. It'd be dumb because they'd know we'll question everyone in the vicinity of the crime scene. They could have easily casually asked about the cameras or overheard someone talking about it, shit, I found out a week ago Milah had to hire a plumber because the sink in their staff lounge had gotten clogged. She was on the phone with the plumber when I was checking in for my appointment. All it would take is one conversation around the wrong client."
"We need a rush on that warrant," Voight looked at Dawson, hinting for him to take care of that. He gave his granddaughter one final kiss before giving her back to her mom. Erin could tell things were picking up and knew pretty soon she and Emma would be overstaying their welcome. Before it got to that point, Erin tugged on Jay's hand, silently suggesting he walk her out. He nods, tossing his arm over her shoulders, signaling to Voight that this relationship has progressed further than he thought. His head tilts as he watches them depart until he could no longer see them.
Erin pauses at the bottom of the stairs, stopping him before he opens the gate. She rests her hand against his chest, looking up at him worriedly when she sighs, "if this case becomes too much for you, no one will judge you if you backed out. Milah was important to you, it has to be hard knowing what happened to her, but Jay, we can't afford for you to make any dumb decisions and take any stupid risks. At the end of the day, I need you home and so does Emma."
His hand goes to her face, cupping the outline of her jaw, urging her to focus on his eyes. He brings his forehead to hers, inhaling because he's never had someone care for him like this, or at least show it in this way, "You have my word." Erin tilts her chin up, pressing her lips against his before backing away, "don't wait up for me, it'll probably be a long night," she nods and he kisses her again, "send me videos." She knows he means videos of Emma so no clarification was needed. He opens the gate for her and doesn't shut it until she's gone. Erin's shoulders relax when she feels his gaze no longer on her. Her grip tightens around her baby, holding her a bit tighter today because of the reminder of just how fragile life can be, "it's just me and you tonight kid," she whispers against her child's head, "I'll swing by tomorrow to bring them breakfast."
Erin makes a mental note to do it before she goes to work, which only means her day will be starting much earlier and she'll need to let her mother know to get to her apartment sooner than normally scheduled. She gets home, and the day trickles by, and if someone asks her how many times she checked her phone for a call or text from Jay, if she said once or twice, she'd be lying. It's sad about what happened with Milah, but Erin was worried for Jay, she hoped this didn't set him back, she hoped this doesn't change him, and she hopes he doesn't blame himself for this. The day goes by drastically slowly, and Emma seemed to notice her dad's absence because it had been hard to put her down that night. By the time morning comes around, Erin is awoken by her phone, ringing minutes before her alarm was set to go off, "Hello," she grumbles. Her eyes remain closed and she presses the phone against her ear. She didn't bother checking the caller id, she was too tired to open her eyes. She hears a muted voice and realizes her cell was upside down, and after adjusting it, she repeats, "Hello."
"Hey Er, it's me," she sits up at the sound of Jay's voice, a renewed sense of energy penetrating her body because though it's been less than 24 hours since she saw him, she missed him.
"Hey, are you okay?"
"I'm trying to be."
Erin puts him on speaker and cancels her alarm, choosing now to be the time to start getting ready. Her mom will be here in half an hour, and she still intended to pick up breakfast for the unit before heading into work. Erin carries her phone into the bathroom, "Did you come home last night? I don't think I heard you come in."
"Nah, I stayed here. I slept for like an hour in the breakroom, but I didn't want to go home. I'm waiting to hear back to see if we got a warrant. I've been reviewing a lot of what we do have to see if we may have overlooked anything. I feel like we're missing something."
"You need to come home today. You don't need to spend another night there. I'm going to pick you up when I get off from work. We can grab dinner on our way home."
He doesn't argue. He knows it's pointless and he doesn't have the energy in reserves to even attempt it, "I'm waiting for the team to come in. I was hoping you can take my mind off things."
She looks down at her phone, the noticeable silent pause and hesitation in his voice as if he feared she'd say no and hang up. Instead, she facetimes him and when he answers, she smiles and props the phone on the bathroom countertop before starting her morning routine, "Do you remember Julia and her son Asher," she sees him nod then continues, "I met them for brunch yesterday, Asher and Emma got to meet. I'll have to send you pictures." Before starting the process of washing her face, she shoots off the pictures, giving him something to look at, to smile at, while she's briefly distracted, "Asher's sitting up on his own now and he could not stop staring at Emma. Julia jokes and says he has a little crush on her."
Erin transitions to brushing her teeth, and notices in her peripheral, Jay is staring, either at her or the picture of Emma and Asher she sent him, "Where's Emma now?" He clears his throat.
"She's asleep in her nursery, Milo is in there with her."
"I wish I was there."
"You can be," Erin spits out the toothpaste, "I'm sure Hank wouldn't mind you calling out."
"I know he wouldn't, but I'd just go crazy at home. Milah has helped me so much, I gotta do this, I have to catch her killer, Er. You saw the photos, that shit was personal. She suffered."
"I know," she whispers, pouting in sympathy, "I know, and I'm really sorry Jay." He bows his head, accepting her words for what they're worth. Erin rinses her mouth and briefly steps out of frame, and when she reappears, he notices her robe had been discarded, it's probably hanging on the hook outside of the shower, and she's left dressed in her nightgown, the pastel blue decorated with orchids scattered around the cotton fabric. A joke desperately wants to fall from his tongue, but he bites down to suppress it, "I am hot," she pinches the fabric and waves it to create a breeze, "I feel so bloated and look so huge in this gown."
"You look perfect."
"Okay, let's not lie now." The two of them fall into a comfortable silence with Jay looking at Erin, gazing at her admirably as she continues to get ready for work. Soon enough he stares up at the evidence board, staring at it for the umpteenth time this morning and only averting his eyes back to Erin when she clears her throat, "Okay, how do I look now?" She's now in her bedroom.
"You always look beautiful to me."
"I'm usually sporting pjs and t-shirts with stains all over it, let's be honest here." She spreads her arms and slowly turns around to show off the newest outfit she purchased.
"Honestly, you look gorgeous," she notices the sincerity in his eyes, "and if I haven't told you already, I'm so grateful for you. You've been an angel in all of this."
"Thanks," a blush darkens her cheeks, "the saying is true I guess," she moves to the mirror hanging on the back of her bedroom door, "you feel beautiful when you dress beautiful." She's out of frame but he knows she's admiring her look. He wishes he was there to admire it as well.
Erin moves back into the camera just as she's putting her earrings in when there's a knock at the door. It startles him, forcing him to straighten his posture, "You expecting company?"
"It's either my mom or Kim."
"Check who it is first before opening the door."
"Yes dad," she jokes, grabbing her phone to carry it with her out of the room, "hi Milo buddy," she rubs the top of her dog's head as he beats her to the front door. He starts barking, leading her to quickly check the peephole before opening the door to let him look for himself. The last thing she needs is for him to wake the baby up, her mom would never forgive her. Erin lifts the phone, flipping the camera around to show him it's Kim, "lower your weapon, Jay."
He sighs, a bit on edge since everything that happened with Milah. The team starts pouring in minutes later and Erin lets him go to get back to work. She hangs up then turns to her friend.
"Why would someone kill Jay's therapist?" Kim skips all forms of greetings and gets right to the point. Ruzek must have told her because otherwise she'd have no idea.
"That's what they're trying to figure out. It could be one of her clients, past or present, it could be family, an ex-lover, a current one, it could be anyone."
"Why would a client murder her?"
Erin leads her friend into the kitchen, "Why does anyone do anything?" She grabs a bottle out of the fridge and places it in the bottle warmer, preparing it for when her mom arrives.
"…but from how Adam described it, it sounds personal."
"Yeah it's obvious she knew her killer, I heard the attack left her completely unrecognizable."
"…and she had a kid?"
Erin pauses, finger hovering above the on button, then she slowly nods and resumes what she was doing, "A teenage son, 16 years old I think. His whole world has just been upended, would probably need to withdraw from school and move states, his dad lives in Kentucky."
"That's horrible, he lost his mom and now he's gonna lose friends too? No relatives here can take him in." Kim sounds worried; the social worker in her wanting to desperately step up.
Erin knew the answer, only because as a favor to Jay, she looked into it last night, "his mother was an only child and her parents are deceased. Dad's from Kentucky, his roots are there so he'll be surrounded by family when he moves. He won't be alone."
"I'm glad he has family but it just sucks."
"Big time."
"I just hope he's okay…all things considering."
"...all things considering," Erin repeats.
Emma's voice fills the room, blaring out through the speaker of the baby monitor. Kim doesn't hesitate to go get her, with Erin staying behind to wipe down the counter,"They need to hurry up and get that monster off the street before he or she kills again." Kim reenters the room with the baby in her arms. Milo moves from the nursery to his spot on the octopus tentacle.
"It kind of puts things into perspective, a scary one at that like if something happened to me and Jay, what happens to my baby? My parents are only getting older and my brother's gone and Jay's brother is not even an option and don't get me started on his dad and-"
"Hey, hey," Kim reaches out with her free hand to grab her friend's wrist, hoping to calm her rambling down, "you already know that if anything happens at all that makes it impossible for you and Jay to care for Emma, I got you."
"I know we entertained it briefly a while ago, long before Emma was here but this is different Kim, she's here now."
"You didn't have to emphasize that, it's pretty clear she's here and what makes it even clearer is the fact that your kid just used her diaper." Kim fans the air in front of her nose, wafting the scent away. Erin must be more immune to the smell because it doesn't affect her in the same way.
"Emma spending one night with you was hard." Erin deadpans.
"That's not surprising though, I mean Emma spending the first night with you when she came home from the hospital was hard, it doesn't mean you didn't get used to it and adapt. Erin, none of us are going anywhere anytime soon so I won't have to put my money where my mouth is but just know for the slight chance that something does happen, I have Emma, you don't have to worry about her. I'll love and protect her enough for all of us."
A silence falls between them. An overwhelming sense of emotion filled her body, and if she didn't put eyeliner on her eyes, she wouldn't be fighting so hard to hold in her tears. Erin throws her arms around her friend, and inadvertently her baby, "I love you."
"I love you too," Kim returns the hug, patting her back and kissing her friend's cheek, "now let's do something about this diaper please." Erin chuckles, and rolls her eyes as she slips the baby from Kim's arms. The morning was off to a pretty good start and because of Jay's call, she had an earlier start to her day. As Erin takes care of the diaper, Kim starts a pot of hot chocolate and as she waits for the milk to heat up, she gets both she and Erin some water. Erin finds her lounging on the couch, sipping her glass of water by the time she finishes with Emma. She lays her down on her blanket and despite being dressed and primed for work, she lays next to her. Kim disappears to the kitchen and returns moments later with two mugs of hot cocoa. She lays both on the coffee table to cool off and then returns to her glass of water.
Erin rolled over onto her side, bottom resting uncomfortably on the floor as she stared at her baby, lying on her back, hands and feet kicking relentlessly in the air, smiling every time her mom boops her nose with her finger. The pink bows clipped into the very few strands of Emma's hair makes it appear like she's sporting two pigtails, "Can you say Ma-ma?" Erin enunciates the syllables, "mama, say Ma-ma."
"Do you really expect your three month old to speak?"
Erin rolls her eyes at Kim's remark, "she's been hitting so many of her milestones early, I figured why not try?" Erin boops the tip of her daughter's nose again, earning another smile. This little one has been smiling plenty and her parents do not take any of them for granted.
Kim lowers herself to the ground, laying opposite Emma, "Little E, can you say Auntie Kim?"
"Her saying mama is far fetched but saying Auntie Kim isn't? You're making it unnecessarily complicated. And I'm just saying, I've been researching, all the articles I've read talk about repeating words and enunciating them slowly so they'll eventually pick up on them when they're ready to speak. So I'm just getting ahead of things because I need mama to be her first word."
"Okay Mary Poppins, you're on top of it."
Abby watches, face scrunching together when her vision is obscured by Milo's tongue, he licks the camera, making the lens blurry. Her phone runs hot, she's kept it on the app since she got back home, out of fear, out of paranoia, she's scared because her anger got the best of her. She looked up at the enlarged photos she had made months ago, all of them hung up around her home, all of them trashed, and cut and drawn over because that's how she has to channel her emotion now. She cannot afford for that to happen again. Abby hits her head because what the hell has gotten into her? It was an accident. She didn't mean to do that. She just wanted to hurt her until the anger had left her body, it just so turned out that it only left her body when Milah was dead. Abby feels herself start to hyperventilate every time Milah is mentioned, the reminder of what she did, of taking her away from her family, away from Jay haunts her. She hits her head in a desperate attempt to get the memory out, she wants to forget, and she starts banging her head against the wall until the comforting sound of Camille's voice fills the room.
She moves away from the wall, and eases towards her phone, lifting it to see the now clear image -since Milo's drool had dried- of Camille lifting her grandbaby. She's happy to see her, the love clear in her eyes, and she wishes, she hopes, she can be loved like that. Normally, she'd have closed out by now, since both Erin and Jay are gone, but she finds herself drifting off to the sound of the lullaby Camille is humming, dreaming of happier times, times before Emma was even thought of, times before Erin was sleeping with her boyfriend and times before Jay had moved to Illinois. It was that one decision that ruined her life, that started the domino effect to get her here, to get her feeling envious over the lifestyle of an infant. Abby wakes up, she looks up at the ceiling, pressing her eyes closed to swallow down the tears, only snapping back into focus when Camille starts talking, "I actually just fed her and put her down to sleep."
"Thanks again for coming early mom, sorry we had to rush out and couldn't stay longer." Abby recognizes the sound of Erin's voice.
"You wanted to do something nice for Intelligence, it's the least I can do, and besides, spending extra time with my favorite baby is like a cherry on top."
Abby clenches her fist, her grip around the phone so tight she nearly breaks it. Anytime she showed up at the precinct, he always turned her away and he'd even go so far as to get upset with her just showing up. But, Erin is a different story for him. Erin is apparently welcomed, and that's another thing on a long list of things that isn't fair, that fuels the rage building and has her taking a knife and drawing an X through her eyes on the blown-up image. It doesn't make her feel better, and that scares her more than anything. She's become more impulsive, and she knows that's the primary reason she killed Milah. She couldn't control herself, she couldn't talk herself out of it. She brought the knife to scare her, but the more she spoke about what Milah did and how her role affected her relationship with Jay, the more she became blinded by rage and the rest of the night became history. Milah's gone. Abby killed her. And now Abby feels bad, she's soaking in misery all while Erin is happy, balancing breakfast in her arms and getting it set up.
By the time the team returned to the bullpen from following up on a lead, Erin had placed a coffee on each desk, catered to each detective's taste bud. All of them were grateful, no one more than Jay. He needed this, the stale coffee in the breakroom was starting to dull his senses. It was a fine time they all had a break, the case was weighing heavy on their shoulders, Jay more than anyone because he wants to use his job to help Milah like she used her job to help him. Erin pulls a seat up to Jay's desk, planning to use it as a table. Everyone settles down to do their own thing as they eat, all muttering thanks and appreciations to Erin for the meal, "Where's Kim? I thought she was riding with you."
"She did. She's here," at the mention of his girlfriend's name, Ruzek raises his head and glances around, "She had to step out but might be back now. Platt needed a social worker, cops were called to a residence for a welfare check, found the dad inside dead and a tender age child. Kim rode with the responding officers when they heard a child was involved so she's probably downstairs, making calls, looking for permanent placement until we locate a family member."
"Damn," Dawson pouts, "how'd dad die?"
"It looks like an accident, dad hit his head stepping out of the shower."
"Damn," Atwater repeats Antonio's earlier assertion, "how long was he there?"
"A little over a day, dad owns his own business and when he didn't show up for a second day straight, one of the managers called it in. It's really sad, I think he was a widower and from what Platt updated me on about the case so far, his wife died in childbirth."
"Damn," and now it's Olinsky's turn to repeat Dawson and Atwater, "how old is the kid?"
"Four," she whispered, the age of the little guy breaking her heart.
The focus of the conversation turns when their food starts to chill. No one wanted to eat cold breakfast food. All split up to do their separate thing as they eat. Dawson scrolling on his phone while taking bites of egg, Ruzek occasionally responding to texts from Kim as he nibbles on bacon, Olinsky on the phone with his daughter as he pours a salt and pepper packet into his grits and Atwater resumes a tv show he'd been binging on Netflix as he pours maple syrup onto his pancakes. That leaves Erin, Jay and Voight, each of which silently sit and eat their food.
Voight watched in bewilderment as they wordlessly switched things on their plates. She set down an extra piece of bacon on his plate, he settled an extra slice of toast on hers. He used the remainder of her syrup to put extra on his pancakes knowing she wasn't going to use the rest. She, an extra packet of grape jelly, swapped with him for an extra packet of strawberry. All done with not one word shared between the two of them. The way they sat closer than was customary, the knowing looks, and when they did start talking, the softer timbre of voice when he addressed her than he used with others around the bullpen. He was acting like they were together, far more than just co-parenting for their daughter's sake.
"When'd this start getting serious?" Voight pops their bubble, reminding them that they aren't in the comfort and tranquility of their home.
"…it's uh," Erin searches for the best word, "new."
"It doesn't look too new. The two of you seem pretty comfortable with one another, like it's more than just a new thing. Just make sure you keep Emma in mind."
"Dad," Erin groaned, her voice sounding reminiscent of her teenage years, "we know what we're doing. We've kept Emma in mind the whole time."
"Just don't break my grandbaby's heart, and you," he points his fork at Jay, "don't break my daughter's heart." Halstead nods. And silence surrounds them again as they eat until their break is over and Intelligence jumps back into their investigation as Erin and Kim leave for work.