Chapter 2: Laser Light Cannon
We go to a fast food district of the beach where Dedede, Steven and Amethyst are running towards the counter of a building called Beach Citywalk Fries as the owner of the establishment is entering the building
"So this is the place that sells fries and owned by a man named Mr. Fryman, impressive." Dedede said
"Hey, Fryman, give me the bits!" Steven said
(flips a "We're Closed!" sign) "Steven, we're closed." Mr. Fryman said
(disappointed) "Aww, what?" Dedede asked
(hits the counter) "Give 'em the bits!" (chants while continuously hitting the counter) "The BITS. The BITS." Amethyst started chanting
(Dedede and Steven join in on the chanting.)
(all chanting) "The BITS! The BITS! The BITS!" Dedede, Steven and Amethyst chanted (banging on counter)
"Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya?" Mr. Fryman asked (goes to retrieve the fry bits)
"Yes!" Steven and Amethyst said (hi-fives each other as Dedede pulled them into a hug laughing)
"Who's your friend? I've never seen him around before." Mr. Fryman asked
"This is Dedede, he's a king from an unknown world that not even Garnet knows about." Steven said
"A king huh? Never thought a king would come here." (empties the bits into a paper bag) "I can give you actual fries if you want." Mr. Fryman said (hands the bag to Steven)
"Just the bits, please." (takes the bag) "Thanks!" Steven said (he, Dede and Amethyst start walking away while eating the bits)
"These bits aren't bad." Dedede said
"Yeah, but what's really amazing is the sunset, my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, the second sun gets bigger and bigger in the sky." Steven said
(bursts out laughing) "Yeah, that big hot second su—" (long gasps, noticing a strange orb in the sky) "Oh no, what is that doing here?" Amethyst asked
"Huh? What is it?" (Amethyst picks him up, causing him to drop the bag of bits while dragging Dedede along by the sleeve.) "Ah, my bits!" Steven shouted (Amethyst carries them away.)
The scene changes to the crystal temple where Garnet and Pearl are looking through a telescope observing the strange orb in the sky.
"This is bad." Garnet said
"Look at the size of it, I had no idea these things were so big!" Pearl said
"Garnet! Pearl!" Amethyst shouted (running towards them carrying Dedede and Steven)
(visibly annoyed) "We saw. Some of us are trying to protect humanity. Where were you?" Pearl asked
(let's Dedede go and puts Steven down) "... Eating fry bits." Amethyst said (Pearl groans.)
"Oh, can I see?" (peers through the telescope) "Woah." (The orb rotates and opens into an eye.) "It's a giant eyeball! Awesome!" Steven said
"Giant eyeball!?" (pushes Steven out of the way and looks through the telescope to try and find something else.) "where's the rest of its body!?" Dedede asked in disgust
"It HAS no body! It's a Red Eye!" Pearl said
"A red eye?! It's going to infect us all!" Steven shouted
"I don't wanna get it!" Dedede said in panic (covers his eyes.)
(slaps Dedede's hands off of his face.) "That's pink eye, Steven." Garnet said (Amethyst laughs.)
"It's going to crash into and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it." Pearl said
"What are we going to do?" Dedede asked
(adjusts her visor) "The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a that belonged to ." Garnet said
"My mom?" Steven asked
(groans) "If Rose were here, this would be so easy." Amethyst said
"I know, but she's not, and the cannon is missing. We'll have to find another solution." Pearl said
"If it belonged to my mom, I bet my knows where it is. He can help us save the day!" (The are speechless.) "Huh? Ehh!?" Steven asked
"Greg is... nice, Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon." Pearl said
"Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven." Amethyst said (puts her hand on Steven's shoulder)
"Amethyst!" Pearl said
"I'm just sayin', even if she did leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now." Amethyst said
"True." Garnet said
"Come on, not everyone is that clumsy." Dedede said
"He's right, I'm sure he's just keeping it somewhere safe. I'll go ask him." Steven said
"We can handle this, Steven." (to Amethyst) "Ready?" Garnet asked
(Amethyst nods. Garnet picks her up, leaps into the air and tosses her at the Red Eye. Amethyst hits it with no impact at all and falls into the ocean. Garnet and Pearl are dumbfounded.)
"Ugh... I'm gonna go." Steven said
"Me too." Dedede said
"... Okay, good luck." Pearl said
The scene changes to where Dedede and Steven are running to a van in front of a car wash building called It's a Wash.
(banging on the back doors of a ) "Dad, it's me! Dad, are you in there?" (starts ramming into it) "Wake- UP! We have to save the WORLD!" (climbs onto the van and start stomping on it) "Dad!" Steven shouted
"Let me try!" Dedede said (takes out his hammer and about to swing it at the van from the side.)
"Wait, don't!" Steven shouted (makes Dedede trip and miss the side of the van with his hammer only to hit it with his head setting off the van's alarm, which he smiles at while Dedede held his head in pain)
(bursts out of the van) "Who's there?! I have a waffle iron!" the man shouted (wielding a waffle iron)
"Dad, it's me!" Steven said
(turns around and sees him, as he drops the waffle iron and shuts the van alarm off) "Steven?" (Steven jumps down from the van and hugs him.) "I almost waffled your face! What are you doing up so late?" (looks up to see Dedede and holds Steven close in fright.) "And who's that!?" Steven's dad asked in fright
"Dad, this is Dedede." Steven said
"You must be Greg, nice to meet ya." Dedede said
"You too." Greg said
"And what do you mean? The sun just went down an hour ago." Steven said
"Oh, heh." (embarrassed) "It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what's up? Just needed to see your old man? Pal around? Learn some lessons about life?" Greg asked
(blushes) "No! We need the light cannon that belonged to Mom, to blow up that eyeball!" Steven said
"Eyeball?" Greg asked
"That!" Dedede shouted (points at the Red Eye)
(Amethyst is seen flying and yelling towards the Red Eye, hitting it, and falling back into the ocean again.)
"Wait, is that a magical thing? The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff. It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what's left of my hair." Greg said (rubs the back of his head)
"But they need Mom's cannon. You've gotta know where it is, like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress, or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean!" Steven said
"Even if it's buried in the ground somewhere!" Dedede said
(Greg picks up the waffle iron on the ground, throws it into the van and shuts the doors.)
"Well, I don't know about all that. But I have an idea where it might be." Greg said
The scene changes to the three heading to a storage building in a big area called U-Stor with Steven running ahead of them.
"A magical storage unit!" Steven said (runs towards the storage building)
"Ha, not exactly. But some would say there's magic inside." (winks at Dedede and Steven, who looks at him cluelessly) "It's just a shed I use to keep things that don't fit in the van. If it's anywhere, it'll be in here." Greg said
(Greg opens the door and reveals a shed filled to the brim with boxes and clutter. Dedede tries to make his way in, but the first few boxes collapse in front of him while one hits him on the head.)
"OW!" Dedede shouted in pain
"If I'm going in there, I'm gonna need some gear." (ties a flashlight to his head with a nearby sock, and an electric cord wrapped around his waist) "Here I go." Steven said
(holding the other end of the cord with Dedede's help) "Good luck!" Greg said
"Stay safe kid!" Dedede said
(crawls into the shed) "Woah, cool! It's like a dad museum." (ventures deeper and notices a long object on the floor) "There it is!" (pulls it out, revealing it to be a golf bag) "Do you play golf?" Steven asked
"Eh, I'd like to think of myself as someone who would play golf... eventually." Greg said
"I play golf." Dedede said
(sets the golf bag upright and notices another slender object) "Hmm, yes!" (sweeps off the various junk on top of it) "A drum." Steven said
"Drum?" Dedede asked
"Forgot I had it." Greg said
(pats it once and continues rummaging deeper) "No, no..." (gasps) "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this—" (shoots a cannon-like object, the projectile unravels into a shirt) "Buy ?" (notices a box full of CDs near him) "Hey, there's a bunch of copies of your old CD!" Steven said
"Huh. Oh, man, I couldn't give those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country." Greg said
(chuckles as he keeps one of the CDs in his pocket) "I know, Dad." Steven said
"You used to be a one-man band?" Dedede asked
"When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up except—" Greg didn't finish
"An ALLIGATOR!" Steven shouted
"No, it was your mother." Greg said
"Hahaha, I know." Steven said (crawls deeper into the shed)
"And we were always together after that. Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I don't know what a magic lady like her saw in a plain old dope like me." Greg said
(accidentally steps on a photo frame of Greg and Rose and gasps) "Uh, Dad, I broke a photo." Steven said
"It's okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs." Greg said
"I'm off hot dogs, they began to disagree with me one day and it was not pretty." Dedede said
"Yuck! You didn't have to tell me that!" Greg said
(something begins to glow near him) "Huh?" (gasps) "The light cannon!" Steven said
(looking at Red Eye, nearer than before) "Oh boy, that thing's giving me the willies." Greg said (scratching his chest)
"Steven and I thought it was a second sun when we saw it." Dedede said
"Not everything is what you think they are, Dedede." Greg said
"Dad, I found it!" Steven shouted
"Really?" Greg asked
(ties the electric cord around the cannon) "Get the van!" (With the other end tied to his van, Greg pulls the cannon out of the shed, along with all his other possessions, which collapse afterwards.) "This thing could save the city, we've gotta get it to the beach!" Steven said
"How? It's too big for the van." Greg said (a wagon rolls by)
"Huh, fancy that." Dedede said
(Greg ties the wagon to the van with the electric cord. Dedede, Steven and Greg lift the heavy cannon.)
"Easy does it." Greg said (They drop the cannon onto the wagon, and its base breaks from the cannon's weight. Dedede, Steven and Greg are speechless.)
(Later, Dedede, Steven and Greg are driving to the beach, dragging the cannon with the damaged wagon.)
"Is it gonna be okay?" Steven asked
(shrugs) "If every pork chop were perfect—" Greg started
(chimes in) "We wouldn't have hot dogs!" Steven said
(watches the Red Eye getting bigger) "That thing's getting huge, it's freaking me out!" Dedede said
"Can't the van go any faster?" Steven asked
(steps the van accelerator) "This is faster!" Greg said
"Don't worry. Come on, let's put on your CD." Steven said (holds up the CD he retrieved earlier)
(embarrassed) "What? Really? Come on, you've heard it." Greg said
(chuckles) "You come on." Steven said (inserts disc)
("" starts to play. Greg is visibly embarrassed. Steven starts to bounce and sing to the song as Dedede joins along. The van drives past others who were looking at the Red Eye, which has turned the environment into a red hue. The song continues to play in the background as they drive up next to Garnet and Pearl at the beach.)
(gets washed back on shore) "Throw me again, I think I'm cracking it." (notices Dedede, Steven, Greg and the cannon) "Is that...?" Amethyst asked
"Hey, guys!" Steven said
(gasps) "He really had it!" Pearl said in shock
"We're SAVED!" Amethyst shouted
"Woah!" Pearl, Amethyst and Garnet yelped
(Destruction begins to ensue as everything is being pulled away by the Red Eye's gravitational force, such as the , electric poles and the Beach Citywalk Fries.)
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy!" Mr. Fryman said (The building's sign gets ripped off, and Mr. Fryman dodges out of its way.)
"We have to use it now." Garnet said
"I don't know how it works, it was Rose's!" Pearl said
"Dad, how do we use it?" Steven asked (Greg shrugs.)
"What are we gonna do!? We're done for!" Dedede shouted
(grabs Steven's shoulders) "Steven, this is serious!" (epiphanous) "The gem. You have Rose's gem!" Pearl said
"That's it!" (lifts Steven and starts rubbing him against the cannon) "Ahhh, come on!" Amethyst said
"Stop that." Garnet said
"It's no use." Pearl said
"Fine, forget it. Throw me again!" Amethyst said (jumps onto Garnet's arm)
"That's not going to work." Pearl said
(The gravitational pull intensifies and starts to pull the van and the cannon too.)
"I got this." (unties the cord from the cannon, as the van continues to be pulled) "Ugh, wait, nope, maybe I don't!" Greg said (gets dragged along with the van until Dedede grabbed him by the feet)
"I got ya!" Dedede said
(starts banging on the cannon) "Please work- unlock- activate- go- please! Everyone's counting on you, you can't just be useless! I know you can help." Steven said
"It's okay, Steven. We'll figure out something else, something even better." Greg said
"R-r-r-right, if every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs." Steven said
(The cannon starts to glow and activate. Steven loses his grip and falls onto the ground.)
"It's working!" Pearl said
(The cannon's hinges unlock and the barrel falls onto the ground. The Crystal Gems gasp as it begins to prime itself. Steven tries to lift the cannon himself, and the Crystal Gems help in.)
"Steven!" Pearl said
"This is it!" Amethyst said
"BRACE YOURSELVES!" Garnet shouted
(The cannon fires a rose-shaped beam at the Red Eye, shattering and destroying it. Shrapnel from the blast began to fall around the beach and destroyed parts of the city boardwalk.)
"Steven, you just saved most of Beach City!" Amethyst said
(to Mr. Fryman) "Sorry about that!" Steven yelled
(yells back) "What?" Mr. Frymand asked
"How did you get it to work?" Pearl asked
"I just said that thing that Dad always says." Steven said
"That thing about pork rinds?" Pearl asked
(pats on Pearl's shoulder) "Hot dogs." Garnet said
"Rose..." Greg said (wipes away a tear)
(The tide suddenly raises in and everyone starts laughing. Greg notices his van getting washed past him by the tide.)
"My van!" Greg shouted
"It's okay, Greg, if every pork chop were perfect—" Dedede didn't finish
"I live in there!" Greg shouted (rushes towards the van)
"Wait up!" Steven said (chases after with Dedede following behind)
"Oh geez, wait, wait, wait!" Greg shouted
(Greg, Steven and Dedede slowly track through the water towards the van, slowly being washed towards the ocean. The camera then moves upward revealing the mysterious knight holding a cup of tea in his hand, The star iris zooms in on the mysterious knight who takes a sip of his tea, ending the episode.)