Not So Heavy Meddle
"Belt? Sneakers without laces? Am I missing something?" Clyde asked Lincoln as they approached the table.
"Maybe." Before sitting down, Loud took the whoopee cushion lying on the bench and threw it under the table. "I guess living with Luan has taught me... to predict pranks."
"Cool." McBride answered, but he realized what he had heard. "Wait, that sounded like bullying!"
"Maybe I'm not sure." Lincoln shrugged. "Someone really wants to get my attention."
"That doesn't sound right." Clyde looked unsure of his friend's statement. "Wouldn't it be easier to just talk instead of trying to pull down your pants or tie your shoelaces?"
"Maybe?" Now Lincoln himself looked uncertain, but he leaned towards his friend. "Clyde, I'll tell you a secret: it's a girl."
"What?" The boy with glasses was confused. "Does a bully stop being a bully if he actually is a girl?"
"Maybe?" Lincoln suddenly began to look puzzled. "I should probably stop saying 'Maybe', it feels like it's not a word anymore." He cleared his throat. "I'm not sure myself, but I think if I asked my sisters, they would say that she has a crush on me. There is a chance that they are right."
"Girls really do know a lot about love." Clyde nodded. "Just like Lori, she gives great advice. She told me to never be myself. I love that woman." Clyde's pupils turned into hearts.
"Nothing ever changes." Lincoln muttered to himself. He started shaking his friend. "Pull yourself together, Clyde! We have an important talk here!"
McBride shook his head. His pupils returned to normal. "Yeah, right. Do you have a plan?"
"Sure I do!" Lincoln raised his hand. "It's called 'Solve the Bully Problem Without My Sisters Even Knowing She Exists, and maybe think of a shorter name for this operation!'" Lincoln smiled. He noticed Clyde's gaze. "Without my sisters, because they always get involved and make everything worse."
"OK?" Clyde shrugged. "What's the idea?"
"I'll kiss her." Loud answered briefly.
"What?!" Clyde shouted.
"You know, you could have fully explained your idea before." Clyde and Lincoln were already walking home.
"I think you're right." Laud smiled guiltily. "I think I was too excited."
"I was already beginning to think that you yourself fell in love with a girl whom you had never even seen." Clyde breathed a sigh of relief. "And I don't know, you'd be talking to her on the phone all the time."
"There's no way I'm going to act like Lori and her boyfriend!" Lincoln chuckled.
"You're too good to act like that villain who stole my precious Lori." Clyde began to imagine again.
"Here are the consequences of the change in the future: one new episode of Clyde thinking about Lori, hopefully the last." Lincoln rolled his eyes.
Clyde came to his senses only when he noticed where they had come. "Why did we come to me?"
"Because you live here?" Lincoln answered the question with a question. "But seriously, I was talking about my sisters, if I met a bully near my house, they would notice. And considering how they... go too far in trying to take care of me, then after the meeting I would risk being surrounded by overprotective sisters. This sounds worse than it seems."
"You could say I'm a backup plan." Clyde was a little offended.
"I would, but sister starting with the letter L took over your mind and you were unavailable." Lincoln looked at his friend reproachfully.
He stood on the path, and Clyde himself near the entrance to the house, the latter looking questioningly at his friend. "Would you like to come in? You know, my dads are always happy to see you."
"A little later Clyde." Lincoln smiled. "She will come soon, don't worry, everything will be fine, go to the house, I'll catch up with you soon."
"Okay..." Clyde opened the door and confidently looked at Lincoln waving his hand and entered the house.
Having placed the backpack near the door, the boy stood by the window and began to watch his friend.
"Oh, honey, are you already there... um, son?" Clyde heard the voice of his father, Harold.
"Oh, hey dad." Clyde turned and waved to his father and turned back.
"Son what... Why is Lincoln just standing there?" Howard noticed his son's friend, he was standing near the house with his back in a pose of power.
"Well... um, it's complicated." Clyde shrugged, showing uncertainty. "I'll try to say what I could understand myself."
"Hare-Bear, the water is almost boiling!" Clyde's other father, Howard, was walking towards them. He noticed his son. "Oh, Sweetie, you're home! Oh, you even brought Lincoln to visit... but why is he standing outside?"
For several minutes, Clyde tried to explain Lincoln's plan to his Fathers, but given that Clyde himself understood little of his friend's plan, Harold and Howard even less so.
"Make peace with the bully...by kissing her?" Harold asked confusedly.
"I do not understand too." Clyde shrugged.
"But, according to Lincoln, he doesn't even know what she looks like... it's just... the wrong way to make peace!" Howard said in shock.
"He for some reason... I think she came!" Clyde pointed out the window.
A girl with dark tan skin, black hair worn in a low ponytail, freckles on her cheeks approached Lincoln. She wears a purple hooded jacket, dark blue jean shorts, a white tank top.
"I think I know her..." Harold muttered.
"Do you know who she is?" Clyde asked in surprise.
"Not really." He shook his head. "I just heard from the director that this girl likes to start fights and pranks on other children..."
"She's not going to beat him up, is she?!" Howard was alarmed.
"I hope not, Howie. She already has enough problems, one more and..." He noticed his husband's amazed look, Howard was looking not at him, but out the window. Looking out the window, Harald's mouth spontaneously opened in shock, Lincoln kissed the girl, right on the lips.
"He actually did it!" Shout out Clyde.
Breaking the kiss, Lincoln wanted to take a step back, but a second ago the shocked girl hit him, and as far as the McBrides could tell, right in the eye.
"Great good heavens!/Oh my God!/Lincoln!" They ran to the boy lying on the ground and holding his sore eye.
"Aw, aw, aw, aw!" Lincoln groaned in pain. "This hurts more than I thought!"
Without saying anything to each other, Howard and Harold took Lincoln and hurried into the house, Clyde took his friend's backpack and ran after them.
"How are you?" Clyde Lincoln asked as they sat on the couch, Loud holding ice on his eye.
Howard was in the kitchen, and Harold was nearby holding a first aid kit.
"It hurts a little less." Lincoln sighed. "But otherwise, everything went as I wanted."
He said it loud enough to make the whole house jump with a triple "What?!"
"Did you know that she would hit you?!" Clyde grabbed his friend by the shoulders.
"Lincoln, this is not the right way to resolve conflicts!" Howard ran into the living room with mittens on his hands.
"Knowing this troublemaker, it could have been worse!" Harold shouted.
"Guys!" Lincoln stood up from the couch. "Everything is almost settled. There is nothing to worry about."
"Almost settled?" Harold approached him. "Lincoln, no quarrel is resolved if one person simply lets himself be hit by the other. Especially here... when you kissed her, but she shouldn't have hit you... and... why... did you even do that?!" He was too confused to speak more.
"I know what needs to be done." Lincoln smiled uncertainly.
Unable to bear the stress, Howard fainted, his husband caught him and carefully laid him on the couch.
"I'm going to call your parents and explain the situation. And then I'll demand that the principal deal with this hooligan."
Howard had already pulled his phone out of his pocket and began dialing one of Lincoln's parents until the boy snatched the phone from the man.
"Mr. McBride, please! Trust me! I have everything under control! I knew what I was getting into! We'll be okay, I promise!" Noticing the adult's hesitant look, he continued. "If... I turn out to be wrong, I will tell you everything myself. I beg you..."
Harold looked from Lincoln to his son, who also couldn't make up his mind. McBride Sr. of course, did not know Loud as well as his son, but he definitely understood that Lincoln did not believe in his plans without reason. He sighed. "Okay, Lincoln. Whatever your plan is, I hope it works."
"Oh, Linky, you're home!" The first person to welcome the boy home was Leni.
"Yeah. Was at Clyde's." Lincoln smiled, hiding something behind his back.
"Oh, I remembered that!" Leni nodded in agreement, but suddenly, she narrowed her eyes at her brother. "Is there something wrong with your eye?"
"Uh... no?" The smile became nervous, boy tried to sound as convincing as he could.
"Oh, okay, I guess its just my imagination!" She hugged her brother. "Dad will cook dinner soon, don't forget!"
"Eh, yes, of course, I love dad food... cool!" Lincoln quickly walked up the stairs. "Who knew that flour was capable of such a thing..." He whispered to himself
"Daddy will be so happy to hear this!" Leni didn't hear last one. She smiled without noticing note and steak in Lincoln's hands.
Fulling the Case
"You really think you're going to win, Lincoln?" Clyde asks, while wiping out heart drawled by Lincoln.
"With what I have planned, I'm a shoe-in." Lincoln nodded.
"The last time you said that, you got punched in the eye." Clyde was doubtful.
"Clyde, how many times have I said, this was part of the plan! Grab your camera."
"I hope we don't have to humiliate ourselves for the sake of something small and insignificant..." McBride mutter to himself.
"Uh... why is Lynn playing soccer when there are about... five... 23... 68 rakes around her?" Clyde asked while he and Lincoln were hiding in the bushes. "And why are we hiding?"
"I bet Lynn that if she couldn't bounce a ball two hundred times while running around the backyard full of rakes." Lincoln smiled as he filmed his sister. "Don't ask where we got so many rakes, I don't know myself."
(Meanwhile)
"Suddenly I felt that the rakes I bought at a discount came in handy!" Lynn Sr. spoke happily.
(Meanwhile somewhere else)
"You're a genius Flip. Who would have thought of selling a bunch of unnecessary rakes at a 99% discount?" He held 15 dollars in his hands.
(Back to Lincoln and Clyde)
"And the main thing is that if I win, I'll get her lucky... something, I don't really understand what exactly she's suggesting. And If I lose... then nothing."
"Nothing?" Clyde asked in surprise.
"Yeah! She was too interested in the challenge that she even forgot that she was supposed to get something." Lincoln smiled widely. "So, I'm a winner anyway!"
"Cool... But why are we filming exactly this?" Clyde thought about it. "I thought we'd do something cool, I don't know... a pool full of diet soda?"
"Sorry, Clyde. Stunts are so last year." Lincoln sighed. "If we want to win, we need comedy... or something very exciting. Comedy is Luan's territory, so hopefully my sisters can do the right thing."
"Right thing? Did you have a bet with the others too?"
"Let's see: Luna's amazing performance in which she literally became a human orchestra. Lori ventriloquizing with rubber boots. Lola's acrobatic dancing with ribbon. And Lisa who accidentally created a mud monster because of Lana." Lincoln listed while holding a laptop. "They did everything right, now all we have to do is apply a little editing magic and we already have victory over HamstaCam!"
"Given that 84 people have already voted for him, it will be hard." Said Clyde, who was sitting next to him. "Lincoln, are you sure your sisters don't mind?"
"Well, of course!" Lincoln nodded vigorously. "We didn't film their... any bad moments or shameful secrets, what could go wrong?"
The next day, many people expressed surprise at Lincoln's video, from his amazingly precise comments to the sheer amount of editing and his sisters' amazing skills.
"Well, there really seems to be nothing wrong." Clyde thought.
"LINCOLN!" Loud scream in Lola's voice quickly caused the boys to doubt the favorable outcome.
"Oh no..." Lincoln squeaked in fear.
"That's where you are!" The pink princess stood in front of them. "My beautiful ribbon dance was supposed to be my secret weapon in the competition! You ruined everything and I won't be able to beat Lindsay Sweetwater!"
"Lola... um... what if we think from a different point of view?" Seeing his sister's questioning look, Lincoln calmed down unbearably and continued. "Your dance amazed everyone who saw it, didn't it, Clyde?" He waited for his friend to nod. "See? That means the judges, too, will probably just be impatient to see your dance live. The anticipation of the start of the competition will pique their interest even more."
Hearing her brother's answer, Lola began to think, her growing smile and frequent "uh-huh" instilling hope in the boy.
"You are right!" The princess chuckled. "You're a genius, Linky!" Lola kissed her brother on the cheek and began to whisper in his ear. "Just the next time, if you want to show my beauty to the world, ask me first, okay?"
"Of course, Your Majesty!" Lincoln smiled nervously, giving a thumbs up.
Lola just looked blankly at her brother's strange nervousness, shrugged her shoulders and walked away. Lincoln sighed tiredly, wiping away the sweat that had formed on his forehead, and noticed the look of "I told you so" from Clyde.
"I get it. Always ask permission."
"Lincoln got a trophy. Lincoln got a trophy!" The twins sang joyfully while looking at their brother's award.
"Congratulations, older brother." Lisa slowly clapped her hands, she looked completely uninterested. "Your creative skills have earned you a reward. I just hope that next time you can do without filming my failed experiment."
"Well done!" Lynn smiled and slapped her brother on the shoulder, almost knocking him to the floor. "The only thing missing is the inscription "Earned with the help of Lynn Loud Jr.!" Everyone ignore that.
"This explains why, out of everything I could find, I found rubber boots." Lori crosses her hands in displeasure.
"There's a bright side Lori, you've found a new friend!" Luan handed the rubber chicken to her sister, who just threw the toy on the floor. "Ugh, party pooper. Speaking of which, Linс, you did a pretty good job of making Lori's boots sound like ventriloquism!"
"I envy him and I'm not even ashamed to admit it!" Mr. Coconuts spoke next.
"Dude, you could have said you were going to post this." Luna looked embarrassed. "Few of my moves were too... radical."
"Sorry girls..." Lincoln looked at the floor. "I just... wanted to win way too much..."
"Whatever." Lori said as if she didn't care. She walked right up to her brother. "But don't even think about doing something like that again, or I'll make a human pretzel out of you!" She went upstairs, making phone calls along the way. Her much kinder tone made it clear that she was talking to Bobby.
"Don't listen to her!" Lynn put her arm around her brother's shoulder. "The main thing is victory! You are the winner, which means you are the main player."
"You shouldn't feel guilt." Lisa said, still uninterested. "Everyone thought the monster was just a CGI, so there was no reputational damage." Her watch began to ring. After looking at them, she silently left.
"I still miss Muddy." Lana said, sadly. Lola rolled her eyes.
"It's nothing, bro, really." Luna ruffled Lincoln's hair. "Like I said, just give me a warning next time."
"Stop blaming yourself, put the trophy in the case already!" Lola pressed the award into Lincoln's hands.
He was just about to start, but he noticed something. "Wait, where are Leni and Lucy?" Lincoln only now noticed the absence of his two sisters.
"Leni somehow managed to drag Lucy on a shopping spree." Lynn shrugged. "Come one put the trophy in its rightful place!" She nudged her brother forward.
With his sisters' encouraging words, Lincoln opened the case and placed the trophy on the shelf with his name on it. It was no longer empty.
There was the sound of a festive whistle. It was Luan who had already put a party hat on her head.
"I'm inviting everyone to celebrate... except Lori, her sour face will ruin the cakes!"
After waiting for the rest of the sisters to go into the kitchen, Luan stopped her brother. "Guess this is partly my fault, I should have taught you that you need to ask permission first if you are going to post a video with another person." She sighed. "But you have already managed to understand everything yourself from your own experience." She smiled. "I think you deserve twice as many pieces of cake, Link!"
"Heh, thanks Luan." Lincoln hugged his sister.