Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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Where the Lines Overlap

Season 2 - Looking Up

How perfect is perfect?

Olive skin, chocolate brown eyes with long eyelashes, dark brown long curly hair...

She was a beauty.

Her face was delicate and flawless, adorned with a snub nose and rosy full lips.

I stared at her from above. I was under the odd impression that I knew her. Then it dawned on me that I was still holding her close to my body and our stuff was all over the floor.

She was way shorter than me, around Bella's height, maybe a little less, so she had her head, that reached my chest, tilted up to look at me, and I suspected she was on her toes.

"I'm sorry." I said as I released her arms and took a step back. "I was distracted."

She seemed a little stunned at first, her eyes unfocused, but then she shook her head slightly and smiled timidly.

Her smile was really pretty.

"I was kinda inattentive too, don't worry." She shrugged. "You're Jasper, right?"

She knew me. So my impression wasn't unfounded. I frowned a little, trying to remember her.

How could I not have noticed her before? She was very noticeable.

"Do I know you?" My doubt was clear in my tone, and I tried not to seem smug, as that question usually sounded.

"We're in the same chemistry class." She spoke lightly. "But you're not supposed to remember me, you got in late on the first class so you missed all the fun we all had when Miss Cherlon made us introduce ourselves like third graders." Now she sounded a little ironic, and she rolled her eyes and laughed a little.

"Not late enough." I grumbled and smiled. "I still had to do it when I got in."

"That's how I know your name." She explained. "You probably didn't see me, I was sitting in the back."

"Actually, your face is very familiar…" And stunning.

Suddenly there was this awkward silence and we simply stood there, in the middle of the hallway, staring at each other.

"Uh, yeah, I'm Alle, by the way." She offered kinda hesitant. "It's short for Allegra."

I smiled at her and offered my hand. She took it and we shook hands.

"Nice to meet you, Alle." I chuckled. "I'm Jasper, but you already know that." Her smile widened and I felt my cheeks warming up. "You can call me Jay. I'm sorry for stumbling into you."

It was her turn to release a soft chuckle.

"No, problem."

"Here, let me help you."

I gathered her books while she picked up my bag and my basketball shoes.

"Thanks." We said together as we offered the respective stuff to each other.

We chuckled once again and she looked at me through her long eyelashes. I felt a subtle pinch in my stomach.

"Don't mention it." I smiled.

We exchanged our belongings while the weird silence came back in full force.

"So… you're in the basketball team?" She pointed to my basketball shoes.

I nodded.

"Yeah." And it made me look at my watch. "I'm actually late for practice." I mumbled pensively, but she heard me.

"Oh, please don't mind me." Her tone was a little apologetic right then and she moved from before me.

I took two strides without turning my back to her and smiled again.

"See you around?"

She smiled back at me.

"Sure. Probably on Monday."

I chuckled a little.

"Probably." I agreed. "Bye, Alle."

"Bye, Jasper… uhm… Jay."

We smiled at each other before I finally looked at the way I was going. But I only took three or four steps before I turned my head instinctively and looked back. She was walking in the opposite direction but had seemingly turned back to look at me at the same time I did. We smiled at each other again before I turned to the gym.

It wasn't until I entered the huge court that I realized there was a silly grin plastered on my lips.

A stab of guilt made my heart seem small all of a sudden, and I got abruptly serious.

I had a boyfriend, a perfect one that I loved with all my heart and wouldn't leave, trade, or hurt willingly for anything. I had just left him at home after having the most amazing moments with him… and now I was feeling affected by a girl I had just stumbled into…?

I scolded myself and felt very ashamed.

I didn't do anything, but I couldn't deny to myself that I felt something, there had been some tension between us, something I was very well acquainted with. It wasn't strong, but it was real. I felt it very briefly but, it had been enough for me to identify that it was attraction, and I couldn't say otherwise.

Shaking my head and trying to convince myself that it meant nothing, I put my bag on the bench and went to the center of the court where my mates were listening to our coach.

It was time to play. I put all thoughts aside.

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"E?" I called him kinda eagerly as I got into the apartment that Saturday evening. I was much more anxious than usual to see him.

Maybe it had to do with the guilt I was still feeling…

"In here, love." I turned my head to the kitchen, from where his deep voice came, and I saw him beaming at me.

God! I loved him so freaking much. Just seeing him made my heart feel bigger in my chest. I didn't need or want anybody else. How could I have felt affected by that girl? Edward was everything I would ever long for, he was essential to me, he was my life.

As I placed my bag and my shoes on the floor beside the couch while gazing at him, I forgave myself for my brief slip. I hadn't done anything really. And I wouldn't, so…

Smelling a delicious aroma of spices and meat, I walked slowly to where he was standing and wrapped my arms around his waist once he was within my reach.

"I missed you."

He chuckled sweetly.

"We were apart for only the afternoon, hon."

"It doesn't matter." My voice sounded serious. "If I could I wouldn't leave your side for a second."

He brought his fingers to my forehead and fondled the skin between my brows. That was when I realized I was frowning. He cupped my face in his hands and lifted it a bit more.

"Did something happen?" He looked at me intently, his eyes narrowing and the gray in them getting darker as they roamed around my face. "You seem a little… wary." His tone was concerned, not demanding, and it kinda made me feel a bit worse.

"Nothing happened." I lied, and I immediately berated myself internally. "I just…" I heaved a weighty sigh. "I get overwhelmed by what I feel for you sometimes."

He softly sighed and pulled my face to him.

"I love you very much too, Jazz." He stated seriously before he ended the conversation with a hard kiss.

It got soft once I accommodated my body inside his arms, and he assured me, through the way his lips were molding with mine, that this, us, was very real, I didn't have anything to worry about.

I released a relieved breath once we got apart. Edward rubbed his thumbs on my cheeks and smiled lovingly at me.

"I have a surprise for you. Are you hungry?" His tone was suddenly a bit mischievous.

"I'm starving." I assured him. "What smells so good?"

"Go take your shower. I'll just set the table for us, dinner is ready."

I frowned and smiled at the same time.

"Did you cook?"

He simply nodded, his cheeks getting slightly pink.

"It's a surprise, don't ask. Just go clean yourself and come back once you finish."

"Okay."

I made a pretty quick job of showering and getting dressed, all the while contemplating how lucky I was for Edward to love me and for things between us to be so great. I didn't want to ruin that, so I had to start being more attentive and aware of what I was doing.

Soon I was walking in the corridor. I smelled the very familiar aroma in the air again as I neared the kitchen, and once I entered it, I grinned like a child spotting a whole bunch of presents under a big adorned tree on Christmas.

"Frito pie?" I asked as I saw the beautiful dish in the center of our small table.

Edward grinned from his seat and nodded effusively.

"And pecan pie," He winked at me and I beamed. "but that's for dessert."

I sat and he served me seeming very anxious. I guessed he was somewhat apprehensive, probably expecting my approval.

I ate slowly, carefully trying not to give away at once how tasty the dish was.

"Won't you eat?" I asked him nonchalantly, kinda teasing him a little.

"Won't you say anything?" He was freaking out. I stifled a laugh. "I'm dying here, Jazz."

"Uh-uh." I shook my head. "Eat." I demanded.

Then we ate in silence, and Edward seemed to resign himself.

I could see the nervousness in his gaze, though, and I hated making him wait but, it would be worth it. I knew the best way possible to show him my gratitude and appreciation.

When we finished, I waited for him to excuse himself from the table and walk to the sink. As he put his plate there I stood up and went to him.

I held the marble edge on both his sides, effectively trapping him between the sink and my body, which I leaned flush with his back.

"You're gorgeous, you have a killing body, you're the best kiss I've ever had, you drive me insane every time you touch me…" I whispered slowly in his ear feeling his body shivering subtly. "You're freaking intelligent, sweet, honest, and caring… you're the best person I've ever known, and you love me as much as I do you." I held his waist and made him turn kinda forcefully. His eyes were hooded and his face was blushed. "I constantly think about how you can be so fucking perfect, and then you cook for me, which is already great in itself, but you not only make the effort, you excel at it." He smiled timidly and his eyes were glowing. "That was damn awesome, darling. It was even better than my mom's…" He bit his lower lip, probably feeling a bit self-conscious due to the overload of compliments I directed at him. I pulled his lip from between his teeth with my thumb and fondled it. "Keep spoiling me this way, and soon you'll have a monster to take care of."

He chuckled.

"My monster." He whispered while staring at my lips.

I laughed lightly a bit, but then the tenuous fun was over. I covered his lips with mine and kissed him.

And then we forgot the remaining food on the table, dessert, the dirty dishes, and the lights that were all on…

We stumbled to my room, then we were in bed… we were bare… our hearts and bodies were in sync… our souls were connected…

And the night unfolded… and our love enveloped us in its intensity.

Later, when the waning moon was high in the sky, I was still awake, watching him sleep. I was praying to the forces of the universe, something I didn't do often, for them to protect what Edward and I had, for it to last as long as we lived, and for me to be the best partner I could for him, so he would never have a reason to leave me.

I was scared… I had the most precious thing in my hands, and I was afraid I would ruin it with my inherent stupidity.

I knew that focusing on fear would only nourish it… but I simply couldn't stop myself.

Such a huge love like mine for Edward was heavy, and I felt small and helpless before it, 'cause I knew, I was utterly conscious of the pain it would imply if I lost him.

I interlaced my fingers with his, and he squeezed them unconsciously.

"Jasper…" He sighed my name.

My heart swelled in my chest and I closed my eyes.

"You're the love of my life, Edward." I whispered, knowing that he couldn't really hear me, but hoping it would reach his subconscious and soul.

A single tear trickled down my face before I finally let myself dive into an exhausted sleep.

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Three weeks later, I was sprawled on the floor at the campus gym after an intense drill.

"Great practice, guys! Great practice." The coach's shout-out reached me, confirming that Wednesday's training was over.

I stood up, took my jersey off, and wiped my face with it while walking toward the side of the court. I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder and turned.

"Sweet slam dunk there at the end, Hale!" Brandon, the power forward of the team, congratulated me with his huge smile.

"Keep it up, man." Mark's voice came from my other side, and I looked at the best basketball center I'd ever played with. "We'll win this fucking game."

I simply nodded.

Both of them were taller than me. Much taller. Brandon, a slim, but pretty strong black guy with impressive light brown eyes, was 6'7 tall, and Mark, the bulky ginger boy with sad icy blue eyes that didn't match his lighthearted and playful personality, was 6'9 tall. But I didn't feel, at all, "small" among them or my other mates, even though I was the shortest one in the team.

It wasn't a problem. Being the shortest player never stopped me from being one of the best on the court. I learned to give the best of myself and trained hard just so my skills would matter more than my height. And since I made the first string being a freshman, I was very confident of my abilities.

Besides, the boys were great. Since the beginning, all of them welcomed me with open arms. Brandon and Mark were the first friends I made on the team, but Troy, Freddie, Aaron, and Kyle were also pretty nice and the seven of us were kind of a group. There were the other mates, Preston, Quinn, Oliver, Nolan, and Jammal, and they were also great and fun, but I wasn't as close to them.

"Nice assists, Hale." The coach said as I passed by him. "Keep up the good work. We'll need it on Saturday."

"I'll be on my best form, Coach." I assured him and he smiled while nodding.

"Hey, can I bring someone to the party?" Aaron asked Mark as we entered the locker room.

"What party?" I asked him while stopping in front of my locker.

"Earth to Hale?" Freddie shouted from behind the wall of lockers and then he appeared on the corner, grinning like usual. "Wake up, man! The party after the game. We were talking about it yesterday."

"He was texting his girlfriend, he wasn't even listening." Troy laughed from behind me, and I tried to maintain my nonchalant facade.

I was texting Edward, which made my friend not that far from the truth, but I wasn't prepared to come out to them yet.

"I don't have a girlfriend." I stated, smiling forcefully. It wasn't a lie.

"You were texting someone, and you were grinning like a fool." He pointed out with a sneer. "Whoever it was, you've got it bad, man."

All of them chuckled and I chuckled along, but just so they wouldn't notice my apprehension.

Yeah, I've got it really bad… for another boy. I wondered how they would react and treat me if they knew I loved and dated a guy…

I wasn't willing to find out anytime soon, but the game was coming, and Edward would be there. I would have to introduce him to my friends and I didn't know how I was supposed to do that.

I need to call Bella. I thought to myself.

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"Hey, Jay!" I heard Allegra's voice as I left the building.

I stopped and waited for her to reach me.

After we stumbled into each other three weeks ago, we kinda naturally started talking and sitting together in class. We ended up becoming lab partners, which made us talk a bit more, but that was pretty much it.

"Are you playing on Saturday? Some friends have just invited me to watch the game." She seemed enthusiastic.

Her joy was contagious, and I felt the urge to smile broader as my heart lightly warmed up and accelerated a bit with mirth.

But I refrained myself. It was not okay for me to feel this way.

"I am." I answered simply.

"They told me about this… party afterward." She seemed a bit disconcerted. "Will you be there?"

"I kinda have to, the team is throwing it and I'm part of the team, so…" I shrugged.

"I was… wondering if…"

Just then my cell phone went off in my pocket.

I was hoping it was Bella, I had just sent her a message saying I needed to talk to her about everything that had been happening.

"Hold that thought." I asked Allegra with a kind smile. It was Bella! "Hey, sweetie!" I greeted her merrily while turning around and lowering my tone.

"Hey, Jay!" It was great to hear my best friend's voice after a week without talking to her.

"I miss you." I said in a soft tone.

"I miss you too. I got your message. How are things?"

"It's been a bit hard lately. I need you."

"Did something happen?" She sounded worried all of a sudden.

"Kinda a lot is happening."

"Anything bad?"

"Not really, no, but…" I sighed. "I just wish you were here. It would be easier with you around."

"I wish I was around too, honey. I don't like how your voice sounds." She was concerned, I could tell by the strain in her tone. "When is it a good time for me to call you? I can't really talk now, I have a class in five minutes."

"I can't either, I need to run to the bookstore. What about tonight?"

"Is seven okay?"

"Seven is good." I would be getting off work and it would give me time to talk freely before I needed to be at home. "So we catch up later."

"Okay. Be good, alright? Everything's gonna be fine."

"I hope so. Love you."

"Love you too. Bye."

"Bye."

As soon as we hung up I turned to Allegra. She seemed oddly despondent, the extreme opposite of her demeanor from minutes before. It got me puzzled.

"Sorry, I had to take that. It was kinda important." I justified my rudeness.

"It's okay." She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

Her unusual and sudden downcast gaze made me feel immediately dispirited.

"You were saying…" I gave her the cue to resume, hoping her pretty smile would resurge.

"Oh, uh… I actually forgot." She chuckled but it sounded weird. "Anyway, never mind. I'll call you about the lab project later." She concluded kind of absently.

"Okay." I said, frowning involuntarily.

"See you at the party." She replied with a half-hearted smile that bothered me.

And then she turned and walked away without looking back.

I felt somewhat uncomfortable, my chest kinda heavy, but I shook my head and pushed the sensation away, and went on with my day.

She wasn't supposed to affect me like that. I wasn't supposed to let her affect me like that.

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"Who is Alle?" Edward asked in a light tone just as I turned off the phone.

It was the end of the day and the very first time I'd been distracted to the point of not feeling his presence before he arrived.

I turned to the apartment door where he was standing.

His face was placid, but I knew him better than that. He was more than simply curious about who I was talking to.

Thing was… I hadn't said anything about Allegra to Edward.

I told myself that the reason for such a dumb attitude was that I saw her once a week, she was just a classmate, and we'd only talk about class-related subjects. There was nothing much to tell him.

But the truth was… I'd been fearing his reaction. I knew he would feel threatened by the simple fact that she was a girl, and if I was to be honest with myself, I was afraid he would be able to tell how she affected me even though I'd been trying my best not to let her.

I took in a deep breath, as discreetly as I could, before telling the truth… or most of it.

"That's Allegra. We take chemistry together. She's my lab partner and my peer for the semester project. I need to take some prints with me early tomorrow, we have a deadline to meet." I clarified in a linear tone, although I was a little nervous. "We were discussing some matters about it."

Edward's countenance seemed neutral, but I could see clearly that he was holding back some emotion.

"Oh." He uttered, moving his head in a short nod just before he averted his eyes from mine and walked away.

My stomach churned.

I inhaled slowly before I followed him to the kitchen. Edward opened the fridge and looked absently at the inside contents.

He was trying hard to be cool about it, pretending he wasn't affected, surely for my benefit. But I knew him enough to read the fear in his eyes. And I wasn't having it.

I encircled his waist from behind and kissed his neck.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked in a low voice, as lovingly as I could.

He closed the fridge door without taking anything from there, twisted out of my embrace slowly, and directed himself to the cupboards.

"Why would I?" He scoffed.

As he took the pot with the coffee grains, I walked to him and stopped at arm's length.

He was being difficult, but just 'cause that was what he did when he felt threatened, it was a defense mechanism. Lucky me I knew him enough to recognize it.

"Edward, please, don't do that." It was a soft plea.

He continued to take the grains from the pot and put them in the coffeemaker, not even looking at me.

"What am I doing?" His tone was forcibly placid.

I hated having to corner him, but he was giving me no choice.

"You're acting like you're not, but I can see you're jealous." I tried to make my voice sound caring instead of terrified like I was feeling.

As soon as the word reached him, he dropped the spoon in the pot and planted both his hands on the counter, exhaled heavily, and bent his head. He sighed before turning his face to me.

"Sometimes I hate that you can see through me." His sentence was tainted with remorse. "Yeah, I'm jealous. But I know I shouldn't be. I know I have to trust you, you've never given me any reason not to. And I don't want you to feel as if I have a say on who you can be friends with."

"She's just a classmate."

His smile was hard as he turned his body completely to me.

"It doesn't really matter, love. You're not supposed to tell me about every single person you study with. I'm just being pathetic." He shook his head.

I took one step, getting closer to him, and then I held his forearms.

"Hey, you're not being pathetic, okay? I would've reacted much worse. So don't feel guilty about it. You have every right to feel jealous." Exhaled heavily. "You don't have a reason to, this I promise you, but you have the right 'cause I made a mistake. I should've told you about her."

Edward shook his head again.

"Jasper, I'm not your owner. You don't have to report every single thing you do, or each and every person you meet or interact with, to me. I don't want to be the paranoid controlling boyfriend, Jazz. It's not who I am, and it's definitely not who I want to be for you."

"And you're not, you'll never be, E!" I assured him. "It's not like that, it's not like an obligation, we're just supposed to share everything like we've always done." He averted his eyes from mine, his brows furrowed. I understood that he didn't want me to see the disappointment in his gaze but it was too late for that. "And, sure, it's impossible to talk about every single detail of what happens when we're apart, but... we both should know about the people that are closer to each of us, the people that are part of our everyday routine, with which we spend a considerable amount of time." He frowned, seeming a bit more hurt. I hated myself. "And Allegra… she's my partner at the laboratory. I'll interact with her more than with other classmates. You'll probably meet her at some point, so..." I sighed and held his contorted face. "Look at me." I requested softly. "I'm sorry. I don't wanna hurt you, even the slightest amount. I want you to feel confident about me, about our relationship. I should've told you about her before, like I told you about my teammates, so you wouldn't be caught by surprise. It's just… it doesn't justify anything, but I was afraid of your reaction." I shrugged.

He frowned further.

"Why?"

"Because I knew you would feel uncomfortable. It is a delicate matter to you and I didn't really know how to approach it without making you feel insecure and defensive."

He exhaled and looked away once more. I was so angry at myself for causing him this distress. I could've avoided all this trouble if I had just told him about Allegra as soon as we met.

"Babe…" I murmured, trying to make him look at me.

"I'm okay…" He assured in a soft voice before he inhaled deeply and brought his tearful eyes to mine again. "We're okay. I understand why you acted the way you did. I just wish I wasn't so afraid that at some point some girl will raise enough of your interest to make you rethink our relationship or… to take you away from me."

"Nobody will ever take me away from you, Edward." I joined our foreheads and he closed his eyes. "Babe, you're my life. I love you with all I have." I pushed us away a bit and gazed at him intensely. "You have all my heart, you're all I need and want. And this is not changing, darling, trust me on this." I pleaded, feeling so damn afraid.

Edward squeezed his eyes and two thick tears rolled from them as he bent his head. I pulled him to me, placing his head on my shoulder. His arms wrapped around my waist and we pressed ourselves against each other, needing to feel as close as we could.

"I got so fucking scared when I heard you saying her name…" He confessed in a muffled voice. "I don't wanna lose you."

It was so hurtful having him that vulnerable and frightened. He was the most confident of us, the most mature and rational, the one who usually assured our connection. It frequently made me unconsciously overlook how fragile he could be, how much he needed assurances as well, how I was supposed to make him feel safe. I knew he had a very sensitive soul… I should've known better, I should've been more careful.

"I'm so fucking sorry." I stated as my eyes flooded with tears of guilt. "Tell me what to do to fix this, to make you feel better."

After a brief squeeze, Edward loosened his hold on me and pushed me away enough for us to look at each other. Seeing that his eyes were reddish and glossy, made more tears flow from mine. I raised my hands to his face and ran my thumbs slowly, lovingly, across his cheeks.

"There's nothing to fix, love." He spoke in a calmer tone as I wiped my eyes. "I know you, and I know you're being honest with me. I guess I just felt a bit overwhelmed by the fear. It's okay."

I regarded his countenance carefully, making sure he wasn't trying to make me feel better. Once I accepted that he was telling the truth, or something very close to it 'cause I knew he wasn't a hundred percent fine, I pulled his face to mine and craned my neck a little to reach his forehead, placing a soft kiss on it.

We held each other in silence for a while. And I assimilated I needed to do better, or else I would have my biggest fear coming true.